A Fish Tale

Chapter 3

by

Oasis Herself

Granted, Jack was undoubtedly cunning and probably one of the finest sailors he had ever met, but his actual piracy smacked more of mischief than the horrific death and destruction that he had come to attribute to pirates. And now, he thought, playing, when we should be doing something about this abominable condition.

Jack had discovered early on in their exploration of the cove, that if he started out deeply enough, he could swim rapidly to the surface and then leap high into the air before splashing back into the water. He had spent much of the afternoon trying to increase the height of each leap.

Some of the leaps, James acknowledged to himself, really had been quite spectacular. Jack had soared high above the waves, twisting and somersaulting in graceful arcs.

James had even tried a few of his own.

Jack, however, seemed to judge the success of each leap by how much water he could displace by slapping his tail sharply against the surface as he crashed back down.

"James," Jack called now. "Watch this one."

James nodded to him and he disappeared beneath the surface again. James sighed and repositioned himself more comfortably on the rocks. This too had been repeated far too many times. "James, did you see that one—James, watch this one—look, James." It was all becoming quite tiresome, he thought, irritably.

He was gazing out over the ocean when Sparrow popped out of the water beside him.

"You weren't watching, James," Jack accused.

"No, I wasn't," he admitted. "To be honest, Jack, I'm hungry."

"Aye," murmured Jack, mournfully, "I'm hungry too."

They had tried to eat earlier. Had returned to their cave, after their first tentative experiments with swimming, and wolfed down some of the food Jack had stored. They had immediately retched it all back up. Even the rum, much to Jack's horror.

"Tastes like piss," had been Jack's critique just before he lost that as well.

Now he pulled himself partially out of the water and collapsed melodramatically. "I'm knackered." He wrapped his arms around the end of James's tail and pillowed his head on it.

Sparrow still had no respect for a person's body, James thought, watching him. He still invaded at will... only now there was simply more body to invade.

Jack lifted his head and cupped his chin in his hand, though his other arm he kept snugged round Norrington's tail.

"Funny, innit?" he asked, and now he brushed his fingers lazily back and forth across the scales above James's tail flukes, "that you can feel so much with these things?"

"Yes, they seem to be very sensitive," James agreed, twitching under Sparrow's fingers.

"Temperature and tide and current, and even other fish," he continued. He tilted his head down, studying James's tail thoughtfully and still tracing the pattern of scales with a finger. When he tried to wiggle a finger beneath one of the larger scales, James twitched and drew his tail away from him.

"Sparrow, that tickles."

"Eh? Oh, sorry." He pulled himself up onto the rocks and leaned down to examine his own tail. "Listen, I come across a little sand shark down there. Nasty little blighters, eh? Soon as he came nosing around, some sort of fluid started to ooze all along my tail. Seemed like the same kinda oily stuff what's in our pouch. Your pouch is wet innit?"

"Yes."

Jack nodded and returned to his inspection. "Anyway, soon as that shark caught a whiff of me, he turned belly up and kinda floated to the bottom. He came to himself after a few minutes and swam away, but were like he was drunk the way he was moving."

"That's curious," James answered thoughtfully. "I certainly hope that works as well with the larger variety. I had wondered what we would do in that event."

Jack scowled at his tail for a moment and then slowly raised his head, finger poised thoughtfully at his chin. As James watched, he broke into a wide grin and tilted his head back to look up at him. "Sharks, mate."

James looked out across an empty expanse of water and then back at Jack, who was still grinning at him. "Where?"

"Don't ya get it? Fish!"

But before James could ask what he meant, he had dived off the rocks and James could see him arrowing off through the water.

He returned a few minutes later, clutching a small fish, which he presented proudly to James.

"Yes, Sparrow, it is indeed a fish. How astute of you." He did not take the offered fish.

Jack shook it at him. "Dinner, Norrington. Take it."

"I've no taste for raw fish, Sparrow," James told him in disgust. "You can't be serious."

"I'm hungry."

"Yes, but still."

"Do you have a better suggestion there, Commodore? Maybe we could slither up onta the beach and build ourselves a nice little fire and cook it. Shouldn't be too much of a challenge for a couple clever lads like ourselves to flop around gathering driftwood and—"

"You've made your point, Jack."

They both sat staring at the fish in Jack's hand. Finally, James shifted and said, "You first."

Jack raised the fish to his mouth and gave it a tentative little lick. "S'not too bad," he said.

"Go on then," James prodded.

Jack glared at him, and then dutifully tilted his head back. He held the fish dangling between two fingers and poised above his mouth.

James held his breath as he watched. Jack scrunched his eyes tightly closed, made a disgusted huffing noise through his gills and began to lower the fish to his waiting mouth.

"I do hope you don't intend to eat that," said a hissing voice.

Jack's eyes flew open and he stared at the fish in disbelief. "Bloody hell," he gasped. He had just enough time to fling it away from himself before Norrington had caught him by the tail and dragged him into the water

"It wasn't the fish, you idiot," James hissed when they surfaced.

They crept cautiously out of the water to peek over the top of the rocks.

Two of the mer-creatures sprawled comfortably in the place they had just vacated. They each had long, nearly black hair and brilliant blue eyes. The larger of the two had his arm wrapped possessively around the smaller and their tails were twined tightly together. They were both male and their relationship to one another, much to James's embarrassment, was apparent.

Jack and James looked at each other and then back at the mermen. "Hallo," Jack chirped.

"Hello yourself, Jack Sparrow," the larger one said.

"You've heard of me?" Jack asked. He smirked and elbowed Norrington, obviously pleased.

"You and the Pirate Hunter both, yes," he answered.

James elbowed him back, and then pulled himself up onto the rocks. "You speak English," he said in some surprise.

"We speak all of the world's languages."

The speech was odd, low and accented, and though he spoke with his mouth, the words hissed through the gills.

"My name is Aroo," he hissed, "and this one," he leaned forward and rubbed his cheek against the smaller one, "this one is my mate."

The smaller one arched into his touch and drew the flukes of his tail up to stroke along Aroo's tail before acknowledging James and Jack. "I am Dree," he said simply.

The sensuality of the creatures was stunning and James caught his breath at the open display of affection between them.

He felt a nudge from behind.

"Shove over, mate," Jack said to him, "give us some room here."

James slid his tail out of his way and Jack clambered up beside him.

Dree tilted his head in puzzlement and asked, "It is odd to me that Jack Sparrow and the Pirate Hunter would be mates."

"Aye," Jack answered. "Commodore Norrington's turned out to be a fine fellow, to be sure."

"I don't think that's exactly what he meant, Jack."

"What'd he mean then?"

James was motioning frantically with his eyes in the direction of the two mermen. Jack followed his gaze, frowned and then his eyes went wide as understanding finally clicked.

"Oh... OH! NO, no, no. Wrong kinda mate, mate. Friends, blokes, comrades in arms."

"I see. Then you are not—"

"NO," James and Jack answered in unison. They surreptitiously increased the space between themselves.

"No offense, a course," Jack assured him, "but ya got lasses around, right? Mermaids?"

"We do," Dree told him, "but they are few in number and when they mate—when any of us mate—we mate for life. We have no inhibitions in mating male with male and, of course, not all of us wish to reproduce." A sly smile slid over his features. "I have seen human males mate in much the same way that we do, certainly it is not an uncommon thing for your kind?"

"It does occur," James admitted, uncomfortably, "but it is illegal and immoral for us." He looked away and added apologetically, "Most of us find it... distasteful."

Beside him, Jack sighed loudly and grumbled. "No food, no rum and now, apparently, a shortage of girls."

Aroo hissed out a laugh. "The Ocean is full of food," he spread his arms wide. "There is an abundance of the red sea grasses and you may eat any of the shelled creatures you wish."

Jack brightened immediately. "Oh, good. And where would that be, I'm wonderin'—the food?"

Dree twisted in Aroo's embrace and leisurely kissed him. They reluctantly parted and Dree turned to face Jack. "I'll show you, Jack Sparrow."

Jack cast a sidelong glance at James, who contained a smirk and nudged him with his tail. "Go on Jack... go on with Dree."

"Ah, but what about the plan, James, eh? What about that?"

"Oh, I think I can manage to explain our dilemma to Aroo without you."

Jack narrowed his eyes at him and gave a quick tight-lipped smile before sliding into the water.

"It is possible," Aroo assured him, "you need only return to the place where you found our brother and spill some of your own blood into the sand where he fell. The enchantment will fade after one full lunar cycle." He paused and looked thoughtfully out over the water. "It would probably be wise to be near the shore, when that cycle ends," he cautioned, "your return to human form may be a swift one."

Before James had a chance to question him further, the water around them was suddenly churning with other merfolk. Some climbed up to join them on the rocks. Others swam and chattered in a hissing language that he did not recognize.

Among those who joined them on the rocks was a male, his pouch grotesquely swollen and his movements slow and awkward.

Aroo, noticing James's attention, sidled over the rocks to his side and quietly began to explain his condition. He was listening in fascination when Jack surfaced a short distance out.

"James," he called, "I've found more friends. And look... she's a she!"

Jack darted through the water to the rocks. "Listen, mate, I'm in a bit of a rush here, savvy?" He nodded his head in the direction of the mermaid and winked, "but I've good news, James." He glanced quickly at Aroo and then motioned James to lean closer. "All we have to do is return to Port Royal, make a bit of a blood sacrifice and then scurry back here to wait it out."

"That's what I've been told, as well."

Jack looked up into the sky, marking the position of the sun. "We'll leave at first light, eh Commodore? I don't much fancy makin' the return trip in the dark."

Apparently, James thought, as he watched Jack preening and flirting... food has been forgotten.

He returned his attention to Aroo, only half listening now, as he watched Jack with the female. He was becoming more uneasy by the minute and when Aroo asked him if he was still listening, James swung his attention back to him. "What? What did you just say?"

"I said, that we are not unlike our little cousins, the sea horses, in this."

"Would you...would you excuse me, please?" Norrington darted through the water to Jack's side.

"Jack! Come away from there." He grabbed Jack by the arm and forcibly dragged him away from the female.

"What are ya doing mate?" Jack slapped at Norrington's hand. "Let go of me."

"NO... listen to me, Sparrow."

"Make it fast. I think she likes me."

"Look, Jack, do you see that male over there with the swollen pouch?"

"Aye. Looks painful. Now let me go." Jack continued to smile and wink at the female.

"No. And stop that."

"Maybe she has a friend... for you. A really nice friend!"

"Absolutely not. You're to stay away from the females."

"Bloody hell, James... why?"

"Because he's pregnant."

"Who is?"

"He is."

"HE IS?" Jack's eyebrows met his hairline as he spun to stare at the male. "He got that way from the lasses?"

"Yes."

Jack twisted again in the water and watched the female moving languorously through the water in his direction, her eyes fixed on him.

"No, no, no... not good, not good at all," he babbled, dodging behind Norrington and peeking from around his shoulder at the approaching mermaid. "It was a misunderstanding luv," he told her earnestly, "I'm not cut out for Fatherhood... er, or Motherhood either." He sighed mournfully and almost sounded sincere as he added, "I'm sorry; it just wouldn't work between us."

She studied him silently for a moment, the corners of her mouth twitching in amusement and then turned a speculative gaze on Norrington.

"NO! No, I'm terribly sorry miss, but I'm spoken for."

Sparrow frowned. "You are?" he asked.

"Yes, Sparrow," he answered through clenched teeth, "I am... remember?"

Jack drifted around to his side, brows furrowed in concentration. "No, mate, I don't, I really don't." Beneath the water, Norrington's tail snaked out—"Lizzie's gonna marry..."—and pulled.

James tilted his head and smiled pleasantly at the mermaid as Jack disappeared beneath the waves. Tails, Norrington decided smugly, were indeed very flexible and useful appendages.

She hissed out her laughter as Sparrow popped back to the surface, and then held her hand out, pointing to the pregnant male. "That one is my mate," she told them, clearly enjoying the joke she had played.

Jack, James had to admit to himself, was doing an admirable job at fending them off.

At least until one of them caught him unawares.

Jack had just surfaced by the rocks next to James and was handing him some of the sea grass when she came silently up behind him, twined her tail with his and dragged him beneath the water. They surfaced almost immediately but she hissed a breathless "thank you." Jack gave a sickly grin and a "you're very welcome, I'm sure" and climbed up onto the rocks next to Norrington. He twined his tail tightly round James's and refused to leave his side for the rest of the evening.

The pod had eventually drifted off in pairs as the moon rose, and now he and Jack had the rocks to themselves.

James could hear some of their strange haunting song in the distance and now that he knew that their condition was a temporary one, he was relaxed and almost enjoying himself.

He was absently chewing on a piece of sea grass, when Jack nudged him with his tail.

"I'm sick James. I'm well and truly sick."

James looked at him curiously. "Dree said that we could eat these things, Jack. Is your stomach bothering you?"

"Not that... 'tis the other. I've caught the other... thing." He wrinkled his nose and waved his hand distractedly over his pouch.

Norrington barked out a laugh when he caught Jack's meaning. "Pregnancy, Jack? You think you're pregnant?"

"Aye."

"You can't catch pregnancy," he told him, polishing off the last of the oysters they had gathered.

Jack sat up and leaned forward. "Ya know how it happens, doncha, mate?" he asked anxiously.

James paused in his chewing, "Yes."

"Aye, that mermaid explained the whole thing to me," he said, nodding wisely. "Only takes one quick flick of the tails and..." he snapped his fingers and winked, "you're in the family way, as it were."

James was on the verge of telling him the truth when some mischief took hold and instead he reached out and took Jack's hand and declared nobly: "Don't worry Jack. I'll marry you so the child will have a name."

Jack tossed him from the rocks.

"Jack?" There was no answer, but that was as he expected. He rolled over to face him and said, "Fine, you don't have to talk... but just listen to me then."

Jack made a noncommittal grunt and James took that as agreement.

"You know that... that" he paused a moment and took a quick breath (dear God, this was embarrassing), "that knot in your... your nob?"

Jack turned his head to look at him. "Aye."

"Well, the merfolk, they do it just like we do it. Not you and I personally of course, I mean...."

"I know what ya mean," Jack growled. "Get on with it."

"When they... mate... in the usual fashion, that knot gets quite large and hard. It serves to hold the female in place long enough so that the, the egg can be implanted in the male."

Jack was sitting up now and staring hard at him.

"I'm given to understand that the females can be rather vicious during the act and the fluid in our pouches serves to sedate them... somewhat, as well, so that a pregnancy can actually occur. It seems that it takes some time to accomplish."

"Then I'm not... there's no way I could be...."

"No."

Jack huffed out a tremendous sigh of relief and sprawled back on the ledge, pillowing his head in his hands. "Norrington, I swear, if ya weren't a bloke, I'd kiss ya right now."

Smirking to himself, James settled on the ledge beside him.

Jack suddenly raised his head and looked over at him. "You bastard, you knew all along."

"Good night, Jack."