Part 6 - Crush
Dawn POV
I know a secret.
It's kinda obvious once you know what you are looking for. I doubt anybody else has noticed, but then again, they don't pay quite as much attention to them as I do. I have had a crush on the same two guys for so long, and now they only have eyes for each other.
It's subtle, I don't even think they realise it themselves, but the past couple of months they have been focusing more and more on each other.
Like now. We are all in the living room, relaxing after the meal. I'm sitting on the floor in front of the couch, pretending to look through old photos with Tara and Willow. Buffy is sitting at one end of the couch, lost in thought. Giles is at the desk watching us all with that almost paternal look he gets sometimes.
But Spike and Xander-- Spike is sitting on the other end of the couch and Xander is in the chair across the room, and they are tossing a softball back and forth between them. It's just another way of them blocking out the rest of the world and concentrating on each other. I think the only time I have seen them break eye contact is when Xander periodically throws the ball at Buffy to try and catch her out, and dammit if she hasn't caught it every single time.
Buffy could do with some sense knocked into her. Okay, she's the Chosen One when it comes to slaying vamps, but I don't think she was chosen when they were handing out a clue, 'cause she hasn't got one. She acts as if everything is all better now. Okay, yes, Xander is better than he was. He gets dressed now, he leaves the apartment (when Spike will let him), and he talks to us. That doesn't mean everything is fine. He's still in all kinds of pain, he's just back to hiding behind humour, so Buffy thinks everything is normal.
She acts as if Xander's pregnancy is just for her education and amusement. I mean, Xander's emotions can be all over the place sometimes, and I know he's really self-conscious about the way he looks, but she just thinks it's funny. Like yesterday at the mall when Xander started acting all...well kinda girly, is the only way I know to describe it. He was really embarrassed, and she thought it was such a big joke. She couldn't stop laughing. Willow and Tara just smiled sympathetically to Xander. I tried to give her one of those, 'Hello? Shut-up' looks, but she didn't notice. Oblivious much?
I think that morning was even worse. Xander didn't want to leave the apartment, because he thought he looked ridiculous. In his words, he thought he looked like he'd swallowed a small European car. Willow, Tara and I had just about convinced him that he looked fine, and that under his baggy clothing you could hardly notice he was pregnant. Then Miss Bottle Blonde had to open her big mouth and say that he didn't look pregnant at all, he just looked really fat. I think if it wasn't for the chip, Spike would have hit her. Xander retreated to his room for half an hour, and only came out once Spike talked to him. Buffy thought Spike was mad because he couldn't come along on the mall trip, but really he was mad at her for upsetting Xander...and also because he couldn't come along on the mall trip.
I don't think he likes letting Xander out of his sight for too long. He really is turning into a total worrywart. I think it's sweet. I'm surprised sometimes that he even lets Xander out of his sight to go to the bathroom. Xander doesn't seem to mind though. He gripes about it a bit, but it's half-hearted. In fact, I think inwardly he actually likes it.
It's nice to know that someone cares. I complain all the time the way that Buffy can be so over-protective of me. Okay, she can be a big pain, but I know it's because she loves me, so I guess I don't mind really. But she's my sister. She would think there was something wrong with me if I didn't complain. It's in the little sister rulebook.
It's the little things I think I notice the most about them, the things that no one else pays any attention to. The way that Spike brought the light back into Xander's eyes a little, and how they get just that little bit brighter when he steps into the room. The way Spike's can't stop grinning at the back of Xander's head when he thinks that no one is watching
They touch a lot more now too. Just friendly pats on the back. A casual hand on the shoulder. All lasting just that little bit longer than you would expect of two guys who were nothing more than friends.
"Ten...Nine...Eight...Seven...Six..."
Here she goes, making a joke out of it again. Xander has been having a hard time with this sickness thing. It usually doesn't last too long though, and Spike fixes him some dry toast or crackers to help him. Afterward he comes out of the bathroom and he just gives a little smile and reassures everybody that he's okay. Sometimes he'll maybe make a gross vomit joke.
Yesterday though, after our shopping trip, we went back to Xander's for a while, and he had his usual nine o'clock mad dash to the bathroom. I went to check on him, to see if there was anything he needed, and I was about to knock on the bathroom door when I heard him sobbing inside. It must be so scary for him to just completely lose control of his body like that. I wanted to go in there and hug him better, but I know he wouldn't let me because he always has to be the brave guy in front of me: afraid I'll lose some of my hero worship. As if! Instead I went back and whispered to Spike that Xander might need him. He looked a little surprised at first, and then quickly slipped away to the bathroom.
"...Three...Two...One."
There he goes. Poor Xander. Buffy actually has a proud look on her face, just 'cause she actually managed to time her silly countdown right. Ooh... Spike is giving her one of his 'hurt him I may kill you' looks. I think a part of him wants to go and comfort Xander, but he's probably too embarrassed to act so concerned, with the rest of us here.
"Buffy, leave Xander alone. I think he has enough to go through, without adding your teasing to the mix." I've never heard Giles sound to exasperated with her.
Oh Xander looks so pale. Unsurprisingly I guess. I'm sure I would look pale if I just yakked up the contents of my stomach. Buffy is getting up to hug him. Like that is just going to make everything all better. He's too nice. I would probably tell her to get lost.
Giles is trying to get my attention. I look up and he indicates the softball that Xander and Spike were tossing around. It has rolled next to my feet after Xander dropped it, in his rush to get to the bathroom. I pick it up and gently toss it to him. I wonder what he wants with it?
"Jeez Xan, have you been using the pregnancy thing as an excuse to start eating like a million calories a day or something. You're big as a.....Ow!"
Oh my God! Giles threw the ball at Buffy! She turns away from Xander for a moment to look at the rest of us. The look on her face is priceless. It's sort of a mix between hurt, and wounded pride.
"Hey, who threw that?"
I can't believe how innocent Giles can make his face seem. Butter wouldn't melt in his mouth.
"Spike! You threw that, didn't you?" She's facing Spike now. Her face is bright red, and I don't know if it's more from anger or embarrassment.
"I'm at the wrong end of the bloody room, Slayer. It's a ball, not a boomerang." Spike just looks like he's sick of the whole situation.
"Who threw that?"
"God Buffy, chill, will you? It was just a little softball. Your head's hard enough to take it." It's really hard to keep the smirk off my face.
"Dawn! Did you do this?"
"It wasn't me. I was just saying it was only a joke. Relax." She stomps off to the kitchen in a huff. I'm not really watching her though. I can see Xander whisper something to Spike. Spike looks a little worried.
"Okay people. Me and Xander and off. Thanks for the fun and all that. Bye." With that, he just marches himself and Xander out the door. Does my sister know how to bring a party to a crashing halt or what? I hope Xander is okay. He should be. I know Spike will take care of him.
**End of Part 6**
Story Notes:
NOTES 1: Dawn POV. The series will switch POV as it goes along.
NOTES 2: Buffy is alive and well in this fic. Not sure if she just didn't die or if they brought her back somehow. It's not really relevant to the story so make up your own minds.
NOTES 3: This part covers many of the same events as part 5, just told from a different perspective.
DEDICATION: First off I want to dedicate this part to my dad, because he felt left out of the dedication for part 5. Second, this also has to go out to Mod. Who loves ya? Ummm...me!