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Story Notes:
AN: The damn bunnies have bitten the crap outta me again! They just won't go away. If you made it past the warnings then you know this is going to have mpreg. If it's not your cup of tea then you don't want to read this.

AN 2: Darla and Angel knockin' boots never happened, so no Connor. Spike did get a soul, but it was through a spell performed by Glory. While Spike did love Buffy, it became paternal. He now goes by Wil. Xander and Anya have only ever been friends and never lovers. Spike was chipped and taken in by Giles, but slept in the guest room not the tub. Buffy never sent Angel to hell, Xander did.

Thanks to Edi for the beta.

Author's Chapter Notes:
Spoilers: Shades of The Pack and bits and pieces of all the seasons of both shows. However, as you know if you've read any of my stuff, I don't write canon. I write from my own little world. I know I'm a nut and I'm quite proud of that fact.



*~*~*~*~*


The flare of a match cast light into the darkness and became Xander's point of focus. "Who's there? Where am I?" he asked, gasping at the pain it caused him.

"Don't know, we fell several floors."

"Oh." A harshly indrawn breath and a hacking cough filled the silence. "Wil?"

"Yes, pet?"

"Move closer, please?"

The light went out and a soft rustle of clothing alerted him to the fact that Wil was complying with his request. A few moments later he could feel the vampire settle himself gently beside him. Wil could smell the blood in the air and could hear the boy's body fighting to work. He knew his boy was badly wounded. Among the sounds and smells of the boy he could still smell the demons they had fought and saved. He could also hear the distant sounds of digging and knew his Sire and their family were trying to save them. Wil only hoped that Angel could get to them in enough time. He could feel the older vampire's distress. Wil quietly spoke, hoping his love could hear him. "Hurry, Sire, the boy hasn't much time." His only answer was a sharp pain in his chest. It was the only answer he needed.

Beside him, Xander was reviewing the strange turn his life had taken yet again as he snuggled closer to the vampire. Xander had the strange urge to laugh and he probably would have had it not been for the pain in his chest. Four years ago, if someone had told him that he would trust his life and sanity to two vampires, he would have laughed his ass off. The fact that he counted on these particular vampires was even more surprising. Angel, whom he had hated and sent to hell. Never mind that he was Angelus at the time. He had hated the dark haired vampire when he was still souled. There had been so many mistakes and misunderstandings between them at that time. It was only through time and Angel's resurrection that they had been able to make peace.

Then there was Spike, who he now called Wil. The vampire he had been given to by Angel in a twisted plan that had not worked out. He had been as surprised as Angel when Spike had beaten his Sire back and carried him away. Dru had proved to be enough of a distraction for Xander to escape. The insane vampire had scream that Spike had to release the kitten. Xander figured he was the kitten. There had been several times when Spike took him and he escaped. Then he had helped them go after Angelus. Everyone knew that Buffy couldn't kill the elder vampire, she was still blinded by her love for him.

Now, years later, they were his parents, his family. His life had changed radically over the last few years. It had all started with Jesse's death. Having to stake his boyfriend had nearly killed him. He still woke up some nights crying because of that act. Years passed and Buffy died three times. The last time had been final. That had been two years before. Dawn and Willow had died with her. A car accident of all things. Demons, Gods and Vampires couldn't keep them down, but a drunk driver took them all away.

It had been painfully ironic that the drunk who had destroyed Xander's life had been his father. His father always found a way to rip his happiness away. This time was no exception.

Of course, the bastard survived, and Xander lost control. Anya had had to lock Xander up for two days until she could reach Giles and the LA crew.

When they arrived they could hear Xander raging at Anya to release him from the room. She had called in several of her old demon friends to bring him to the Magic shop and lock him in the containment room.

Flashback//

Anya trembled as she opened the door to the small group. She was so relieved to see them. "ANYA! LET ME OUT! HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO ME? YOU WERE A VENGEANCE DEMON! LET ME GET VENGEANCE! HE KILLED MY GIRLS!" Xander's screams were inhuman and the sound of death rang through it. The last two days had left the former vengeance demon shaken. The gentle and loving boy she knew was gone. In his place was a creature born of pain and rage. She, too, was grieving for the loss of her friends, but she could not allow Xander to go down that path. If Joyce had not been killed by Glory she would have been there to help them. Perhaps then Xander would have been calmer. But Joyce was not there and Giles had moved to LA the year before. Buffy no longer needed a Watcher and the older man had gone to LA to be with Wesley.

Cordelia and Faith stood side by side, silent in their shock. This was not the boy they remembered. This was not a side of Xander that either young woman had seen. Both had dated Xander and had been changed by him in a profound way. The coldness and rage that had lived in both girls had been tempered by the gentleness and love given to them by Xander. He had literally saved them.

For Wil and Angel it was less of a surprise, they both knew what the boy was capable of. They grieved with him and only their souls and their promises to The Powers kept them from killing the elder Harris. They wanted to do something to help him through his pain. They both owed him for the second chance they had been given. After Glory had placed the spell on Spike that had returned Wil, it was Xander that cared for him. It was also Xander who figured out that the same spell could be used on Angel, so that he no longer had to worry about the happiness clause. Xander had also been the one to convince Wil to return to LA with Angel after Buffy's resurrection. They owed their happiness to him.

For Wes and Giles it was equally disturbing. Wes could sense something different in Xander, something he had only had hints of before. The newly developed empathic gifts he had been cursed with were also being overwhelmed with Xander's pain and rage. Giles could feel the return of something he had thought caged. He turned to Anya. "How long has he been this way?" Anya turned tear filled eyes to him. He could see the grief and exhaustion in her eyes. "Two days, ever since the police told him it was his father that killed the girls. I had to call on some of my demon friends to help me bring him here. He was going to kill Mr. Harris."

"Maybe you should let him know you're here, Giles." They all turned to look at Graham. The former marine was concentrating on the door that housed his friend. Graham and Riley had joined up with the LA crew just two months earlier. They had come to LA to tell Wil how to remove the chip. They had felt they owed it to him for his help in defeating Adam and Maggie Walsh.

Through their friendship with Buffy and Xander they knew that Wil had his soul returned. They wanted him to be able to defend himself against evil humans. The group looked back towards the door as Riley and Oz came through it. The only ones not there were Gunn and Fred. Gunn had stayed behind to watch the office and to protect Fred. The young woman still would not leave her room. Neither man was given the chance to speak before Xander managed to knock down the door. "I was afraid that would happen," Anya said calmly.

The new arrivals were shocked by the change in Xander's appearance. The dark haired youth was gaunt and his skin was grey. He had two day's worth of beard. It was obvious he had harmed himself; he had blood and scratches all over him. However, it was the feral, haunted look in his eyes that let them know they were not dealing with their Xander.

The young man growled and began to mutter to himself. "Out, got to get out. Harmed pack, must pay. Killed the soldiers, have to avenge. My family, he took them." Giles was alarmed by the words. Fear coursed through him as he realized that Xander's grief had released both the Soldier and the Hyena. They were fighting for supremacy with Xander's own personality.

"Oh dear, this is worse than I thought," Giles whispered.

"What is it?" Graham asked.

"The hyena is out." Cordy and Oz gulped and pulled those around them back.

"So not good," Cordy squeaked.

Xander scented the air and looked around him. He could hear growls and snarls, but he did not realize they were coming from him. He smelled pack around him and it confused him. The hyena also sensed the true father and the one it claimed as mate. Giles gasped when the glowing yellow eyes fixed upon him. He remembered those eyes from the last time he had been faced with the hyena.

Giles was surprised to find himself within the arms of the distraught boy. "Girls gone!" Xander wailed and clung to his father. Giles rocked him and held him close as the boy wept out his grief and pain. As Anya had hoped, Giles' presence helped Xander to cope with his grief, though a part of her mourned the fact that Tony Harris would not end up dead.

It was two days after the girls' funerals that the new Slayer arrived. The small group had been doing patrols and letting the demons know that there was still someone watching over the Hellmouth. Giles was pleased to see that the new Watcher was another outlaw like himself. He knew that the newest Slayer would survive. Timothy Giles would take after his uncle when it came to setting things out for his young charge. Rupert knew that Timothy would make sure that Rose's life was more than slaying.

It was decided that when they left Sunnydale they would take Xander with them. Though the young man was controlling his grief better, it was obvious that the other two personalities were still fighting for control. They would be taking Anya with them as well as all three entities would not leave her behind. The woman was their family. Anya was fine with it as Xander was all she had.

Xander shivered in pain and came back to the present. It had taken nearly a year before he was able to completely merge with both the soldier and the hyena. He became stronger and faster because of it. He also now had the ability to strategize. He snorted to himself, obviously he hadn't been quick enough. He and Anya had a family and a home now and both were content.

He sighed softly and leaned closer to Wil. "Do you think the others are alright?" he asked breathlessly.

"Yes, love, I'm sure they're fine," Wil reassured. He could feel Xander getting weaker and hear his heart slowing. Wil shifted slightly and pulled his boy onto his lap. Cradling the damaged boy in his arms. Xander closed his eyes and pressed his face into Wil's neck. He was so tired, he knew he was dying. He mourned the fact that he would not have the chance to say goodbye to the rest of his family.

Xander also cursed himself for never telling Oz how he felt. They had both ignored the fact that Xander had gone after him the first time he was controlled by the hyena. Then after he had been brought to LA, the hyena kept urging him to take Oz and claim him as his own, but he couldn't. He had loved Oz for so long, but after Jesse he only dated women. In his grief he denied his basic nature and because of it he now was bereft of the chance to tell Oz about his love.

"Wil?" Xander gasped.

"Yes, love?" Wil asked. He was becoming more distraught.

"Would you do me a favor, Wil?"

"Sure."

Xander took another gasping breath before speaking again. "I've written several letters and left them in my night stand along with my Will. Would you please make sure everyone gets their letter and that my wishes are carried out? Would you take care of Fred and Anya for me?"

Wil fought the urge to howl out his denial. "No need, Pet, you'll make it out of here." Xander lifted a weak hand to Wil's cheek.

"Please, Wil, don't pretend. We both know I'm dying. Will you do this for me?" Wil bite back a sob and took a needless breath. His pain was evident in his voice when he spoke.

"You have my word, I'll do this for you."

"Thank you," Xander whispered before succumbing to the pain, and fainting. Wil held the frail human tighter to his chest and wept.

Two hours later....

The last boulder was rolled out of the way and Angel ran through the opening. When he came back out he held both Wil and Xander in his arms. Wil had protectively curled himself around the boy. Angel gently lowered them to the ground.

Giles was about to pull Xander from Wil when they realized that Xander had not moved or made a sound. Tense silence descended on the group, so that they heard the boy take a last, shuddering breath.

In the alleys and the tunnels surrounding the old building demons and humans alike ran from the rage filled sounds and explosions of grief filtering from the building.

=====================================================================

Xander looked around him in confusion and wonder. He was in a beautiful garden filled with sunlight and flowers. He felt at peace for the first time in years, but at the same time he felt he did not belong. "That's because you don't." Xander spun round at the sound of a familiar voice.

"Willow!"
Chapter End Notes:
Disclaimer: I don't own any of our pretty playthings. Joss and a lot of other people do. I just sneak them through a portal and torture them a little.







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