DISCLAIMER: Star Wars and all publicly recognisable characters, names and references, etc are the sole property of George Lucas, Lucasfilm Ltd, Lucasarts Inc and 20th Century Fox. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.
Obi-Wan had not slept. He had sat motionless through the long night, staring blindly into the darkness, his thoughts turned inward. Only when the first rays of dawn appeared did he move.
Eidolon had done him a favour, he decided, uncoiling stiff limbs. Exhausted though his body might be, his mind had not allowed him to fall asleep. Not with thoughts of... what the alien had said...going round in circles in his head.
Was the alien telling the truth? Did his Master really feel that way about him? Part of Obi-Wan said no, absolutely not. But the rest, the deepest part of himself that he kept hidden and showed to no-one...that part wondered.
The worst thing was that some of what Eidolon had said was correct. It was true that no Jedi Master had chosen him to be his Apprentice within the allotted time, despite all that he had done to be noticed...despite all his attempts to live up to everyone's expectations. Nothing he had done had ever been enough. If it hadn't been for Qui-Gon, Obi- Wan would be a farmer now. And...as for the rest...
Did Qui-Gon regret his decision? Had Obi-Wan been a disappointment to him? He didn't know -- but the doubts that must have always been inside him had chased themselves through his mind all through the night, until he had thought he would go mad.
"Not dead yet?" A taunting voice interrupted his musings. Eidolon watched him from a few feet away, amusement in his eyes.
Obi-Wan clenched his jaw and did not reply, concentrating instead on dealing with the pain that swept over him as he moved. It hurt. Everything hurt, right down to his eyelashes. Yesterday he had thought nothing could hurt as much as Eidolon's attempt to take control of him; today he wasn't so sure. But at least it took his mind off... everything else.
With a grimace Obi-Wan reached back with his free hand and, using the tree behind him, slowly climbed to his feet. It took a good deal longer than it should have -- all his muscles seemed to have seized up and the pain increased with every movement. Finally though, he was standing, albeit leaning heavily against the tree. Only then did he look across the clearing at Eidolon and meet the alien's gaze.
Obi-Wan looked terrible. When Eidolon had first opened his eyes in the early dawn light, Qui-Gon had felt a sharp burst of dread go through him. His Apprentice was so still, leaning against the tree, his skin the colour of old ashes and his eyes unblinking...but then he had moved and the relief that had poured over Qui-Gon had left him reeling in its wake. His Padawan was alive. For now. But unless he did something soon, he wouldn't stay that way. "Think," he told himself. "Obi-Wan needs you."
For a moment, fury at the memory of what Eidolon had done to the boy the night before swept through him. The Wraith had tormented his Padawan, manipulated his feelings... Qui-Gon shuddered inwardly then he carefully filed his anger away. Anger would not help him. It would not help either of them. He would deal with it...and everything else...later.
Once more his thoughts returned to the moment when Eidolon had flung him aside and usurped his body. The trance. That had to be the key... With an effort, Qui-Gon put his fear and concern for his Apprentice out of his mind, and focused on the Force. And freedom...
It was a little better, now that he was standing, Obi-Wan found. The pain seemed to ebb to a manageable level and, if he took quick, shallow breaths, the roiling of his stomach subsided. Somewhat. He blinked down at Eidolon, trying to ignore the starbursts of pain exploding in his temples.
The Wraith was smiling again -- a cold smile he had never - - ever -- seen on Qui-Gon's face. He was just waiting for him to fall over and die, Obi-Wan realized. "Well, I'm not going to give him that satisfaction," he thought grimly. "I'm a Jedi Padawan. Surrender is not an option." With an effort he straightened his shoulders and stepped away from the tree. It felt as if someone had tied lead weights to his ankles, but he was standing. And moving. So far so good. He spoke, somewhat surprised that his voice sounded firm and confident. Too bad about the rest of him...
"Get up."
Wordlessly Eidolon did so, bracing his shoulder against the rock to gain the necessary leverage.
The Apprentice's eyes narrowed. "Turn around."
As the alien obeyed, Obi-Wan limped slowly toward him, blaster in hand. He checked the cables looped around the other man's wrists then sighed in relief. The bonds were still secure, although from the marks on his skin, Eidolon had obviously tried to loosen them during the night, to no avail. Obi-Wan stepped back, feeling a little better. But not much.
The Apprentice turned and shaded his eyes. Far away, a distant range of hills shimmered in the morning light. There. That must be where the sensors had picked up the power supply. That had to be it. Refusing to consider the consequences if he were wrong, Obi-Wan rubbed his forehead, wondering if he could make it that far. It was taking all of his strength just to remain standing and breathing was becoming difficult. For a moment, despair threatened to overwhelm him, then he hastily pushed it away. He couldn't surrender. Not yet.
Not ever.
"What now?" Eidolon was eyeing him expectantly.
"Now we walk."
"Why am I not surprised?"
If standing was marginally better, walking was infinitely worse. Obi-Wan was certain that every step was going to be his last but he forced himself to keep moving just the same. "I will not give in." It became a chant that he recited over and over. "I will not give in..." Ahead, the chain of hills grew larger. Obi-Wan concentrated on them, ignoring the increasing feebleness of his limbs as the sun began to beat down upon them.
After a while, Eidolon slowed and glanced over his shoulder. "Why don't you just give up?" he asked.
"No." Obi-Wan couldn't spare the breath for a longer reply.
Eidolon frowned. "What is it about you Jedi? Why won't you accept your limitations? The reality of your situation?"
Obi-Wan kept walking. "Because that's what we do," he said slowly. We see what can be, not what is, then we do whatever it takes to change it. I don't expect you to understand."
Eidolon resumed his pace. After several moments he broke the silence. "That's really quite admirable."
"Thanks. I'm glad we meet your approval." Obi-Wan couldn't produce his usual level of sarcasm but he was fairly proud of the effort, given the circumstances.
"I think we could have been friends under other conditions," the alien was saying.
Obi-Wan shot him an astonished look. "Friends?" He snorted, then fell silent.
"I don't see why not. We're really quite similar. We both refuse to accept the status quo. And we're not afraid to do whatever it takes to get what we want."
Obi-Wan stopped and turned to face him. "Let's get something straight." His voice was a little stronger now. "We are nothing alike. You take what you want at the expense of other lifeforms. Their suffering means nothing to you." He drew another laboured breath. "You have absolutely no notion of what it is to be a Jedi, do you? A set of stolen memories and some second-hand emotions, and you think you're an expert. It doesn't work that way. You tried to turn me against my Master last night, preyed on my insecurities -- probably thinking it might help you escape. Well you were wrong. It doesn't matter if what you said is true or not -- it doesn't matter if Qui-Gon is disappointed in me. I'm a Jedi Apprentice. I owe him...everything. And I'm going to find a way to return his body to him, if it's the last thing I do. Understand?"
Obi-Wan ground to a halt, gasping for air.
Eidolon smiled icily, his eyes cold. "It might," he said.
"What?"
"It might be the last thing you do."
Obi-Wan regarded him for a long moment then turned away, resuming his pace. "I know," he said tiredly, almost to himself.
They reached the shadow of the hills by late morning and entered a narrow gorge that ran through the russet-coloured rocks by noon. Around them the air shimmered in the heat while overhead a bird wheeled in the cloudless sky.
The shade helped him a little but Obi-Wan was almost beyond caring. His vision kept blurring at regular intervals and the pain was beyond measure. He had almost forgotten what it felt like to breathe normally and he was finding it difficult to maintain his footing. But somehow he kept going.
"Why haven't you tried to take over my body again?" he said out loud to the alien, trying to think of something besides the pain.
Eidolon laughed briefly. "Don't think I haven't thought about it, Padawan. But right now I'm having too much fun watching you try to complete your mission. And, numb hands notwithstanding, I'd much rather be in this body than yours. You don't look at all well..." He injected a note of cloying concern into his voice.
Obi-Wan didn't bother to reply.
He was close. Very close. As Qui-Gon sank deeper into the trance, sound and light began to recede. "At last..." His thoughts went briefly to his Apprentice one last time before he plunged even deeper into the energies swirling around him.
//Padawan.//
"Master?" Obi-Wan started and glanced at the man beside him. No. Eidolon, not Qui-Gon. Obi-Wan swallowed and gave himself an inward shake, wondering if hallucinations were the next symptom of his illness. He shook his head to clear it...and the world spun around him. The Apprentice muffled a groan and kept himself from sinking to his knees by sheer willpower. He leaned against the rock face and closed his eyes, trying to quell the dizziness within him.
Obi-Wan never heard him. Soundlessly, without warning, Eidolon turned and lunged at the Apprentice, the frayed and broken edges of the cable still wrapped around the alien's wrists. Obi-Wan jerked upright, but not in time. In one flying movement the Wraith had tackled him, knocking him to the ground. The blaster skittered away out of his grasp and then they were struggling for possession of the lightsabres on his belt.
Obi-Wan gasped as Eidolon's elbow connected with his sternum then his Jedi training...and something else...took over. Suddenly he didn't care that he was ill, in pain, and definitely outweighed. He had had enough of this. Enough of Eidolon's taunts, enough of allowing this usurper to use his Master's body against him. He abandoned his grip on Qui-Gon's lightsabre and doubled both fists together, landing a solid blow to the alien's jaw. Eidolon rocked back then surged forward again, rolling until he was sitting on top of Obi-Wan's chest, using Qui- Gon's superior weight to pin the Apprentice to the ground. Eidolon reached out with both hands for the boy's throat... and squeezed...
Obi-Wan bucked futilely. It was no use. One arm was trapped beneath his body and the other was held down by Eidolon's left knee. He could get no leverage. Urgently the Apprentice tried to reach out for the Force but he was finding it difficult to concentrate. The adrenaline that had allowed him to throw off the effects of the insect bite was quickly fading, and he couldn't seem to focus. Darkness began to encroach on his vision...
Qui-Gon had reached the centre. His centre. The darkness around him was replaced by swirling lights and images. The Force. Thoughts and memories assailed him. A feather- light touch of...something...grazed his mind, beckoning...
Suddenly a sense of urgency clawed at him. Obi-Wan. His Padawan needed him. He had to hurry. Without hesitating, he flung himself into the river of streaming lights.
And then he could see again, through his own eyes. Could see his Apprentice struggling, weakly now, as Eidolon choked the life from him...and he knew. Knew how to get this parasite out of his mind. With a silent echo of an ancient war cry, Qui-Gon flung himself into battle.
The world around Obi-Wan was fading, growing more distant - - the reasons to keep fighting more obscured. It would be so easy to let go, to rest... And then something brushed against his mind...and the shadows were gone. He could see again. Better than that, he could breathe.
Obi-Wan dragged a painful, dust-laden breathe of air into his starved lungs -- and was immediately seized by a fit of coughing. Agony shot through him and his vision clouded. Some driving sense of urgency though, made him ignore his tearing eyes and the pain in his chest, and lift his gaze.
Eidolon still held him by the throat, but lightly now. Obi-Wan blinked, meeting the gaze of the other man. "Master?" It was Qui-Gon...wasn't it? The man did not reply, his whole being caught up in some internal struggle, a struggle reflected on his face...
Relief poured through Obi-Wan. Qui-Gon wasn't dead. He wasn't fighting alone...
But then the brief glimpse of his Master began to fade. Obi-Wan could see...sense...Eidolon beginning to reassert control over the body, could feel the fingers once more beginning to tighten around his throat...
"No!" With almost the last of his strength Obi-Wan managed to free his right arm, stretching out for the blaster on the ground nearby. He could almost reach it...
There. He had it. With the tips of his scrabbling fingers, the Apprentice managed to drag it closer, just enough. And then it was in his hand and he was aiming it upward with shaky hands.
"Damn you!" Eidolon was shouting furiously. "Why won't you just die?!" His grip tightened.
The Apprentice batted weakly at the hands around his neck. "Get off," he managed to choke out, levelling the blaster at the man's chest.
Eidolon wasn't going to obey him this time, he could tell. The alien's expression was wild, his intent evident in his eyes. Obi-Wan hesitated briefly then his finger tightened around the trigger.
"You won't shoot." Eidolon glanced down at the weapon dismissively. "Think of Qui-Gon..."
"I am," the Apprentice whispered, "and I know he'll forgive me." Then he pulled the trigger...