THE LIGHTER SIDE OF MAUL

by:  Seven O'Nine
Feedback to:  jsolinas@erols.com



DISCLAIMER: Star Wars and all publicly recognisable characters, names and references, etc are the sole property of George Lucas, Lucasfilm Ltd, Lucasarts Inc and 20th Century Fox.  This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment purposes and no money was made from it.  Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended.  Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.  Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.  Not to be archived without permission of the author(s).


[Obi-Wan is hanging over the pit, with Darth Maul standing above him. Obi-Wan glares up at Maul]

MAUL: I have you now, Jedi!

[Obi-Wan doesn't reply. Maul frowns]

MAUL: Aren't you going to drop?

OBI-WAN: No.

MAUL: Are you certain?

OBI-WAN: Absolutely.

MAUL: Well, you know, I can't reach you down there.

OBI-WAN: I know. That's why I'm doing it.

MAUL: How am I supposed to kill you, then?

OBI-WAN: Well, you can't. So I'm just going to hang here and not do anything.

MAUL: Well, that's a bit inconsiderate.

[Maul starts to wander around the pit, then turns to look down]

MAUL: Suppose you came up to fight me?

OBI-WAN: You must be joking.

MAUL: No, really!

OBI-WAN: Look, I can't fight you at all! You just kicked my lightsaber off the edge, and it was the only one I had.

MAUL: (crestfallen) That's true. (brightened) I suppose I could break mine in half and give you one?

OBI-WAN: (interested) What?

MAUL: Yes, it comes right apart.

[Maul snaps his lightsaber in half into two lightsabers]

MAUL: (unhappy) Oh, but you ruined one half.

OBI-WAN: Well, then I'll have to keep dangling here and you can't kill me yet. I don't suppose you could just go away and let me go?

MAUL: Oh, no. My master would be displeased. How's yours?

OBI-WAN: You just stabbed him.

MAUL: Oh, I forgot.

OBI-WAN: Look, I can't fight you.

MAUL: How about if we fight, but not with lightsabers? You could come up and we could arm-wrestle.

OBI-WAN: If I climbed up there you'd stab me first.

MAUL: No I wouldn't.

OBI-WAN: You're a Sith. You don't have honor.

MAUL: (indignant) I do so! I've never cheated in checkers in my life.

OBI-WAN: (quizzical) How do I know you're not lying?

MAUL: You'll have to take my word for it.

OBI-WAN: You're a Sith.

MAUL: Ohhhh... I guess you're right. Hmm...

[Maul appears to be thinking]

MAUL: Where were we?

OBI-WAN: I think you had just said, "I have you now, Jedi!"

MAUL: Oh, thank you! (ignites his lightsaber) I have you now, Jedi!


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