DISCLAIMER: Star Wars and all publicly recognisable characters, names and references, etc are the sole property of George Lucas, Lucasfilm Ltd, Lucasarts Inc and 20th Century Fox. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.
"KENOBI!"
At the bellow, comparable to an exploding ship, Obi-Wan froze. The princess's arm was still twined around his, suddenly seeming like a steel band. I'm dead, he thought frantically. I can't hit him or the treaty with the Republic will go down the tubes...
"Hello," Mirika said with a white smile, batting her eyes at her fiancee.
Obi-Wan unsuccessfully tried to extricate his hand from Mirika's. "Uh, your highness, let me explain-"
Prince Calian's broad face was bright red, almost exactly the color of his beaded vest. His thick arms were bulging as he flexed his fingers, a homicidal gleam entering his eyes. "I am going to tear you apart," he said in a remarkably serene voice. "You sneaking, sniveling, crawling, spying, cheating worm."
Obi-Wan flushed a little and started to reply. Then Calian lunged forward.
Caution gave way to self-preservation. Obi-Wan tore his hand from Mirika's and dodged the huge hands. As Calian turned back to the attack with a roar, Obi-Wan seized his arm and flipped him over his head. A muscle twanged in his side with the effort, but it paid off.
There was a thunderous crash and a bloodcurdling howl of fury. Obi-Wan winced and considered not turning around, but glanced over his shoulder.
The prince was tangled up in a mass of prickly flowering plants, his clothing and skin torn by the huge thorns. He continued roaring and screaming, thrashing around, but mercifully ignored Obi-Wan.
He glanced at Mirika. Her hands were clasped girlishly, and she was looking at him in a chillingly adoring manner. He froze inwardly, suddenly more terrified than he had been with Calian's sudden vicious attack.
"Uh," he stammered, rubbing at his sore side for a moment. "You should... umm... get someone to look after him. I have to go."
Mirika nodded and batted her eyes a little. "Of course, darling," she fluttered. He took his opportunity and ran for it, back into the pristine halls of the palace.
As Obi-Wan sprinted to his suite, his only thought was, "Master Qui-Gon's going to have a fit..."
Contrary to Obi-Wan's expectations, Qui-Gon did not have a fit. He did not yell, or pace, or even rise out of his chair. He simply stared at his padawan, his ashen face taking on a distinctly green tinge, before he closed his eyes and covered his face with his hands.
"Obi-Wan," he said faintly.
"Yes, Master?"
"Did I, or did I not, inform you that getting into any kind of fight with the prince could be detrimental to our very purpose here?"
"Yes, Master."
Qui-Gon finally put down his hands, with an air of great patience. "So why did you fight?"
Obi-Wan wriggled a little, shuffling his booted feet. "He attacked me."
"Why?"
An expression of nausea crossed Obi-Wan's features for a moment. "Because the princess caught me leaving the palace... and she started taking me on a tour of the gardens. I couldn't help going... and when Calian saw me..." Obi-Wan clapped his hands together with a loud SLAP noise. "It was like trying to wade through a tsunami."
Qui-Gon's bearded chin was resting on the heel of his hand. Obi-Wan had never seen him look so completely ILL before. "Well-"
There was a loud knocking at the door, and the white head of King Ajuka appeared in the doorway. "Sorry... am I interrupting?" he asked slowly.
Obi-Wan shook his head, biting hard on his knuckle to keep back a shriek of terrified anticipation. Qui-Gon was looking dully at the king with the air of a martyr.
The king came in, wringing his hands. "Look, I know you two and the other Jedi worked hard on this treaty. But... um, it seems that my daughter and her fiance... no longer have an understanding."
For a moment, Qui-Gon swayed on his chair. Then he gripped the desk as the king continued, looking at Obi-Wan skeptically. "Err... I never really thought of a Jedi as my daughter's type," he said haltingly. "But if she's certain and you're certain... I hope you'll be very happy together."
Obi-Wan Kenobi came closer to fainting than he ever had in his life.