True Slash

Part 1 - Joxer the Snarky

by Werewindle

 

"We'll make camp here."

Thank the Gods, my feet are killing me. Xena takes the saddle and supplies off Argo before setting off to catch dinner. Gabby starts gathering stuff for a fire maybe she wants a hand? "Can I help?" *Glaring* "Um, Ok I'll just, ah, sit over here out of the way."

Sometimes Gabby can really hold a grudge, I didn't mean to trip. Besides she got all the manure washed off.

Well if I'm going to be ignored anyway I might as well work on my story. Dite told me that writing was a good way to work out you thoughts. She was talking about the nightmares I used to have, especially when I traveled alone. The writing really helped and I don't get nightmares as often. Now that the nightmares are gone it seems I have room for dreams of a different sort. I write these down too. Not because they confuse me or are even frightening, I just don't want to forget them.

Morpheus has favored me with dreams about my god, Ares. In them he lets me worship him physically, offering up my own body in tribute. Sometimes he finds me traveling and takes me away to keep as his pleasure slave. In the best ones though, my favorites, Ares loves me. Cares for me, sees beyond the surface clumsiness. Lets me ramble on with out getting mad, maybe even thinks my song is cute.

Such fantasies right? I mean what would the God of War want with me? I'm not even a very good warrior. I know that, even if Xena and Gabby don't think I do. It s just easier to pretend, after all, putting up with their irritation is better than dealing with their pity. At least I have my dreams, even Ares can't get mad at me for them. Everybody needs dreams, something to strive for, they give us mortals hope.


"Joxer, Joxer! *smack* Pay attention, what are you doing any way? Hey! If that's one of my scrolls..."

"No! Gabby give that back! It s mine, c'mon please... It's not funny Gabby, give it back!"

"Joxer, *giggle* are you trying to write a story? A slash story none the less, with you and *snort* Ares? How pathetic is that?"

"Gabrielle, give Joxer back his scroll."

"But Xena! He honestly thinks he can write romance. I mean what could he know about romance?"

"It's not like you could do better, you gave up fiction writing remember?" Cranky much? Sheesh.

"Joxer, of course I could do better. I am a Bard after all. You are just a fool wannabe warrior."

"Don't be rude Gabrielle. I'm sure Joxer can write just fine. He does have a vivid imagination."

Thank you Xena.

"Delusions, you mean."

"Gabrielle." That's right heel Gabby, heel.

"What?"

"You two will quit fighting, before you give me a headache."

"But Xena"

"Stop! This is what you are going to do. Joxer is going to finish his story, and you are going to write one as well. In a week when we reach Athens we'll go to Dite's temple and she can judge which is better. Ok?"

"Shouldn't Joxer have to start a new one as well?"

"Why Gabrielle? You said it your self; you're a Bard, he isn't. What's one little scroll in a week to a Bard, it's not like it has to have plot or anything.

"Settled? Good. Joxer sit back down. Gabrielle, dinner is burning.

Ok, well wasn't that great. God I can't believe I thought I was in love with that harpy.


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