Moss, Sable and Jade III by Raven Chapter Six Scarcely an hour later, Alex awoke. He was still pillowed on Sable's chest, the strong arms still securely around him. It was a lovely feeling, better than when he'd held Fitz, this was the nicest way he'd ever left his slumbers. Moving carefully, Alex shifted so that he could look at Sable, really look at the man. In repose, Sable looked younger, the fine lines around his eyes and on his forehead smoothed in the absence of tension. The lashes were long and thick, the eyes nearly almond shaped, a surprisingly feminine touch on such a masculine man. And he was quite masculine. Alex let his eyes drift down Sable's body, starting with the thick neck, the webbed band of scar tissue marginally lighter than the rest of the tanned skin. The shoulders were broad, the muscles solid, a fine balance for the deep chest and powerful arms. He wasn't huge, not like Earlic, but he was quite strongly built. The hands that held him were broad and rough, years of hard labor in all weather taking its toll, yet they were gentle, sensitive enough to feel the faintest movements of an unborn colt. Thinking of Sable's hands brought a flush of warmth to Alex, and he quickly moved his gaze to the hardened, flat plains of Sable's torso. The waist was trim, the hips, too. Sable's thighs were not so trim, a full length of hard muscle, as were the lean calves that followed. The feet were neither large nor small, they were simply the perfect size to support the man. It was an attractive package, very attractive. Alex had seen handsomer, no doubt, his time shopping with the mistress for a new bedslave had shown him male beauty in its highest form. But Sable was real, as real and solid and basic as the horse flesh he tended. It was a strong rugged face and form, and Alex found it fascinating. But more fascinating was the man himself. A soul with convictions, and yet he had his conflicts, too. Sable didn't doubt himself or his role in life, but he occasionally doubted the life itself. He should have been angry and bitter, yet he chose to live in patience and forgiveness. The man had been born a master, by his own admitted past, yet he willingly remained a slave to another. And now, now he was taking another slave to heart. Alex wondered again at what he felt for Sable, for the Master. What had Sable called him, Moss? Sable had pleaded leniency for him, and used the name 'Moss.' It suited the master, but it sounded like a slave name. Why would the master have a slave name? Who had given it to him, and why? What did it mean? Alex was brought out of his musings by the feel of eyes watching him. The body under him had made a subtle shift, from sleep to wakefullness, and now, Alex raised his eyes to meet Sable's. The stablemaster was staring as thoughtfully as Alex had been, and, seeing that he wouldn't startle the young slave, Sable raised a hand to cup his face. "So many questions in your eyes, Jade. So many questions, and so few answers." Alex tensed, his entire being going cold, silently pleading for Sable to be silent. "Easy, little one. Easy." Sable gentled him the way he would one of the horses, and Alex responded in kind, though he didn't really relax again until Sable hugged him closely, saying, "I will ask no questions, Jade, or at least, none you have to answer. I know you will not share who and what you are, not yet. That is not blame, Jade, you cannot share yourself, not yet. I have faith that there will come a day, when you will tell us your truth. I am content to wait for that day." Alex said nothing, only nodded against the warm solidity of Sable's compassion. He knew the "us" referred to the master, and again, Alex felt his heart being seared with the knowledge of what he must do. But not yet. Not yet, please, oh Goddess, give me just a little more time. With the prayer echoing in his soul, Alex closed his eyes for a moment, letting the pain wash over him and away. It was the way he'd gotten through beatings, not fighting the pain, but going so limp under it, that it faded fast, having nothing to cling to. It served him well here, and he was able to open his eyes and meet Sable's with none of his dark terror about. "I'm sorry, Jade. I didn't mean to upset you." Sable's face showed genuine concern, and Alex smiled, gathering his nerve about him and letting his feelings for Sable guide him. He brought one finger up, and used it to trace the stern lines of Sable's mouth. "Forgiven. I'm not upset, Sable, but you do me an injustice." Sable heard the faint tease in that warm voice, and relaxed marginally. "How so?" "You forbid me to think of anything serious, and yet you yourself have them in mind. It is unfair, Sable." "You're right, Jade. You must allow me to make an amends." So saying, Sable parted his lips, capturing the tracing finger's tip in a kiss. Alex stilled, but his eyes showed no fear, and he gave a faint nod at Sable's asking look. Taking Alex's hand in one of his own, Sable proceeded to kiss each finger tip, before pressing his lips to the palm. He was rewarded with a slight gasp as his tongue barely followed the life-line, and Alex's eyes darkened as Sable's mouth moved to his wrist. Exploring the pulse point with his lips and then again, with his tongue, Sable catalogued every shift in breathing, each shade of ever-deepening green, noted that the pulse was beginning to speed, that the handsome young man in his arms was now leaning closer. Abandoning the wrist, Sable drew that lush mouth down to his own, and there was nothing chaste in this kiss, for all its gentleness. It was a lover's kiss, a pure and simple need for the taste, the feel of Alex's mouth opening under his own, and Alex responded with shy hunger. Alex was lost, lost in the feel of Sable's tongue tenderly exploring him so intimately, the awareness of need, within himself, for Sable to not stop what he was doing. In all his years of being used, Alex had seldom been kissed, and now, without those years of fear to hamper the sensation, Alex felt the pleasure of the caress spiral through him. It was the most wondrous physical sensation he'd ever known, and he whimpered as Sable eased away. "Please? More, please?" Alex had no idea the picture he made. Green eyes as dark as the spruce trees around them, huge and full of virgin need, lips flushed to deep rose, his words an honest plea. It was nearly enough to make Sable's head spin, and his resolve to stop them there crumbled. Instead, he raised up on one elbow, laying the younger man down as he did so. Alex was shaking under him, but Sable was careful not to lie atop him fully, only enough that they could go on kissing in comfort, but with a hint of each other's bodies, as well. A quick, necessary check into those vivid eyes assured him that it wasn't too much, and Sable returned to the soft fullness already opening to him. Alex sighed with relief when Sable's mouth covered his again, and without being fully aware, wound his arms around Sable's waist. His hands settled on the man's hips, bringing them marginally closer to his own. It wasn't much, but he felt the length of Sable's erection pressing against the wool of his trousers, and realized that his own penis was just as erect. Alex sent Danally a brief but soulful thank you. He hadn't been sure he could become erect. It hadn't happened naturally in years, not since he'd been given over to the mistress. She could ensure he became erect, though it was often a painful process, and more a learned reaction to avoid worse punishment. When Alex had first begun to seriously contemplate courting Sable, it had occurred to him that he might not be able to become aroused. He hadn't worried overmuch, his only sexual experiences with men assuring him his penis wasn't even needed, so long as he could provide a receptacle. Still, he wanted to do more for Sable, be better for him, and now, feeling his own hardness, he was glad that he could offer this, as well. He wasn't wasting much time thinking, though. Alex was beginning to meet Sable's tongue with his own, the newness of the sensations making him bold enough to even dare stroking his tongue along Sable's bottom lip. This caused the large frame to shudder, and a faint moan that Alex recognized as pleasure escaped the parted lips. Sable began to kiss his way down Alex's throat, nuzzling at the pale column of flesh, making the tiniest of suckles at the tender junction of neck and shoulder. A faint nip, immediately soothed by a stroke of Sable's tongue, and Alex squirmed. Sable eased back, though he didn't want to, and forced himself to breathe deeply of the cool afternoon air. He used the crucial moment of clarity to check on his still shaking partner. "Jade, we should stop, little one. I don't want to, but we must. Gods, but I don't want to stop touching you, tasting you." He proved this by taking another sweet kiss, then forced himself back away. "I-I haven't hurt you, or frightened you, have I, Jade?" Alex raised a hand to the concerned face, and shook his head, his breathing not quite back to normal. "No, Sable. You did neither. Is...is that what it's like? Is that how it feels, when you love someone? There was no pain, and I wasn't really scared at all, only shy of the newness. It felt good, Sable, it was the best I've ever felt. Will it be like that, when you take me? The hurt will have the good feelings on top?" Sable just barely kept himself from reacting at the last question, the thought of taking this lovely creature making the blood pound in his ears, even as it tore at his soul. "Have you never known pleasure, with another?" Sable kept his voice gentle, letting the love in it cover the rest of what he was feeling. "No. There were times when it didn't hurt as bad, but it was never good, never like this. I wanted you to kiss me, Sable. I wanted to kiss you back. Is it okay? Th-that I kissed you back?" Sable smiled down at him, not wanting a moment of this to be spoiled by fear or doubt. "It's more than okay, my Jade. I'm very, very glad that you kissed me back. As for the rest of your questions, yes, it feels very good when someone you love touches you. There might be a little discomfort, but there shouldn't be real pain, or only a bit, for just a moment. And fear has no place at all, none. If I touch you and you're afraid, you must tell me so, right then, no waiting, understood?" "I understand. Sable?" "Yes?" "Will...will you call me that, again?" The thick lashes dropped down to cover the brilliant green, and Sable realized what Alex referred to. Pressing a kiss to the broad forehead, Sable murmured it against the silky pale skin. "My Jade." It wasn't possession or ownership, Sable didn't mean it like that, Alex knew it. But the words made him feel warmed, made him feel as though he were a part of something, rather than alone. "And what should I call you?" It was whispered, for Alex might be feeling more loved than ever, but it was all still shockingly new, and he was unsure quite where the boundaries were. "I'm your Sable, of course." Sable had propped his head up on one hand, and Alex looked up at him with delightful reticence. "Say it, Jade. Please?" "My Sable." The mouth scarcely did more than shape the words, but it was enough. Gathering Alex into his arms, Sable lay back, feeling the sigh more than hearing it. And he would offer thanks to whomever he must, including that charlatan of a feline, if it meant Alex was snuggling next to him, and could sigh with happiness and contentment. They lay for a while, neither man willing to break the connection. At last, Sable regretfully stood, holding out his hands to Alex. "I'm sorry, but we should go soon. It's getting colder, and we have to be back home before nightfall." Alex said nothing, only gave his hands to Sable, letting the man help him up. Once on his feet, Alex looked around again, noticing that Sable had wrapped an arm around his shoulders. He let his own arm rest at Sable's waist, comfortably ensconced. "This is a beautiful place, Sable." "Yes. Wait until you see it in the spring, with all the flowers and grasses. We come in the summer, too, when we have a chance." "Isn't it too hot?" "Exactly. The water stays cool all year, we come to swim." Alex nodded. He knew of swimming. His former master had been fond of it, lazing about in water just too high for the boys to keep their heads above water, without bobbing, and he wouldn't tolerate much of that. Alex himself had nearly drowned, until he'd gone limp, and discovered that if he but relaxed, he would float, and could attend, then sink and rise again when needed. "Do you swim, Jade?" "No. But neither do I drown." The words made no sense to Sable, but looking down, he saw pain in his new lover's eyes, and let it pass. "It is not necessary. We also picnic, and since I know you take great pleasure in eating, we can stay ashore." Alex, hearing the forced lightness, looked up, and realized what had happened. Moved by Sable's concern, and realizing there really would be no pressure for answers until he was ready, Alex turned his face up, reaching to kiss Sable's mouth. It was his first time to initiate a kiss without being asked, and Sable treasured the feel. "Thank you." For letting me be, for giving me more pleasure than I've ever known, and for letting me learn to love, Alex thought. He didn't say it, couldn't, his throat had grown tight, but Sable seemed to sense the rest. "You're welcome, my Jade." A return of his kiss, and then Sable smiled at him, winking to ease his emotions, and turned to their ground spread. They folded and packed, and soon were back on the horses, riding toward the village. They would pass through it to go home, and Alex steeled himself for the experience. It wasn't so bad this time, they were but passing through, and soon, the gates had closed behind them, and ahead of them was Samstar Fields, and home. Home, and the master. "Sable? I-I wanted you to know that you can ask things. I may not answer, as you say, I'm still too scared, but you can ask. I have your example, if it hurts too much, I will say. I do not want you reluctant to ask me, though. And, and I realize that what I say to you will be said to the master..." "Stop!" Sable's voice was an order, and Alex obeyed from instinct, turning curious eyes to the older man. The tone hadn't been harsh, but it had been firm, and Alex saw a hint of anger in the brown depths. Swallowing hard, he blurted out, "What did I say?" Sable calmed himself, seeing the fear and confusion. He reminded himself again that Alex simply didn't understand, and took a moment to move closer to Alex, as close as the horses would allow. He reached out, and Alex gave his hand. Sable kissed the palm, reassuring him, and squeezed lightly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be hard. You said nothing wrong, that is, you didn't say the wrong thing, but something you said was in error. Jade, what you say to me, is to me, and no one else, not without your consent. Do you want me to share with the master to make your burden lighter, then I will happily do so, but only at your wish. I will keep whatever confidence you place in me, Jade, always have. Your work, yes, that I discuss with the master, for that is his concern. Your heart, and what you choose to share from it, is your own. Remember that, little one." "I may tell you things, and you will keep them from him?" "If it does not relate to your work, to our work and home, then yes. Now, do I think you ill or in danger, yes, that I will share also, as I must to keep you safe, but you will know before I go to him." Sable waited a few moments, allowing Alex the chance to wrap his mind around this new concept. When the green eyes showed comprehension, he continued. "The same is true for you, Jade. I expect you to share with your close friends things we do and even some that we say. They are your friends, they will want to know if you had fun, if I kissed you and if you liked it." Sable smiled at the blush that flooded Alex's face. "It is only affection, and right for you to share. Do I tell you something from my heart, that I expect you to hold close. What we share is between us, no one else, and I would not become gossip, Jade, not my intimate moments. The gossip cannot be helped, I have not sought companionship on an off day in quite the while. But they should not know details. Am I explaining this poorly, Jade?" "No, I understand your meaning. I can tell them we went to the village, but I shouldn't tell them you said the master makes you incredibly angry sometimes. I can tell Thomas your kisses take my breath and make the earth spin, but he shouldn't know exactly what we did or how." "My kisses do that to you?" Sable looked slightly stunned at the idea, but extremely pleased as well, and Alex couldn't help a grin, even as he nodded. "Good. I thought it was just me." Alex bit at his bottom lip, looking down at the reins, unable to quite believe he had the same effect on Sable, but thrilled at the possibility. Sable didn't try to hide his smile as he returned to his original point. "Yes, that's it exactly. Privacy is not something you have had much practice with, sweetling. I'll be patient, never fear that a slip will ruin things, it won't. But do try." "I will." Sable used his captive hand to pull him in for a kiss, though the position was awkward and the horses protested. Jessopa even threatened a nip, and Alex pulled her head away just in time. "Jessopa!" At the sound of the surprised scold, the horse ducked her head, but snorted, and Sable chuckled. "First I need permission to court you from the cat and now the horse plays chaperone. Jade, promise me you will not ask Drell for a pup. Promise me now." Alex chuckled, and they moved back into an easy ride. They were another mile down the road, when Alex realized he'd never finished what he was saying. "Sable, I meant it earlier, you may ask things. You understand I most likely will not answer, but you do no harm by asking." "I thank you, Jade. I will trust you and ask, in time. But what prompted this?" "The master. You called him Moss. I wanted to ask about it, and I knew you wouldn't mind, even if you didn't tell me. That made me realize that I wasn't sharing. I've been so afraid of having to answer, I kept praying no one would ask. But now I know I don't have to answer. That changes things. I need to share now, it's only right. The master expects us to give, not just take. Thomas says that's especially true in love. 'You can't expect a girl to give you her lips if you never give her your heart,' he said. 'You don't have to love them, and you shouldn't pretend if you don't, but you have to like them and respect them, or it's wrong.' At least, that's what he believes, and it sounded right, felt right to me. Is he right, Sable?" "He's very right. And now I know what makes him so popular with the kitchen girls." Sable grinned, knowing that Thomas might take his pleasure, but would never trifle. It also explained how he could have been linked to nearly all the girls in the keep, and half the boys, without coming to a messy end. "He is popular with them." "Not just Thomas, from what I hear. Isn't there at least one of the kitchen girls with a crush on you?" Sable was teasing it, he'd seen for himself, and been pleased at how it was handled. He expected Alex to pinken, and was startled when the lovely mouth smirked at him, instead. "Aye. And who had two visits from the Widow Timmons this month? If her horse is pregnant, so am I." Sable snorted with laughter, and Alex joined in, proud of himself for catching Sable at his own game. The more he learned of this man, the more it seemed important to make him laugh, to tease and taunt him in shared fun. Alex couldn't say why, but the only thing that made him feel better was making the master laugh. They rode on in content silence for a bit, when Sable's stomach growled. He looked annoyed, but shrugged it off, wondering aloud, "I wonder what Leona's planning for supper." "Roast of beef, seared onion and peppers, corncakes and gravy, cold fruit soup and ginger cookies for dessert," Alex rattled off easily, and Sable eyed him curiously. "How do you know?" "I work in the kitchens now, Sable. I'm mostly outside, and I still don't know much of how things are actually made, but Leona always gives us the week's menus, so Marita and I know what we'll be doing early. Marita read it to me yesterday, for this coming week. I helped spit and cook the beef three quarters done yesterday. Tomorrow I'll strip the sides, boil the bones, and skim broth, then we'll make more of the beef base. I have another beginner's lesson tomorrow, too. I'm going to help with the pounded dough." "Do you like the kitchen work, Jade?" "It's good. I like the stables better, but if the master assigned me to the kitchens all the time, it would be pleasant enough. I'm not fond of scrubbing the pots, but it's satisfying work. I don't know, the only thing that's really seemed like work to me was wood gathering. Everything else, even the hard things, they're so easy. It's all so easy, Sable, and yet..."Alex paused, unsure if he was ready to share this or not. Finally, he took a deep breath and continued. "Yet, I struggle. Not with my work, or to obey, there's no difficulty with that. No, I struggle with myself. I still don't know who I am, Sable. I'm not even sure what I am, not anymore. I know myself to be a slave, but the Master's so good, and my servitude so different than anything before, it confuses me. Yet I know I am not free, either. I have more freedom than most freemen, and yet I am bound more securely to the Master than ever to anyone before. If he sent me away, I would come back, run back to him like a salmon to the stream. I've been beaten until death was a visible pall across my face, and it never made me so desperate to please as does the thought of disappointing our master." Alex paused, taking a deep breath and closing his eyes for a moment. "And you. I have been hurt more by women, it's true, but they usually had a male image in hand when they hurt me. I've been taken more times than I have eaten in my life, and yet when you look at me, touch me, I cannot feel the whore. I haven't been pure since I was fourteen, yet any child bride knows more than I do about what to expect from a lover. I want to be with you, I want to know you, give myself to you, but I worry, Sable, that you can find value in a gift so often given." Alex abruptly closed his mouth, fighting to keep back a sudden swell of tears. He'd not intended to say so much, but he didn't regret being this honest, at least. Sable's hand reached out for his reins, and Alex noticed that they were stopped, and Sable was dismounting. The big man came around, holding up his arms as he'd done before, and Alex didn't hesitate to go to him. Once on the ground, Sable simply held him closely, and Alex gave in to the tears, knowing they would heal. If he'd learned anything since being bought by the master, it was that tears were always allowed. Sable led them to the side of the road, one arm around Alex, holding tight, the other keeping the reins in hand. He secured the horses quickly, simply throwing the leads over a nearby branch and looping them, then turned back to Alex. There was a fallen tree nearby, and Sable walked them to it, seating himself and gently easing Alex to sit in his lap, holding him like a child. "Okay?" Alex nodded. It was nice, actually, sitting in Sable's lap, with the man around him, but he scarcely noticed, letting his fear and shame wash into Sable's cloak. It was a flood of tears, but brief and soon ended. Alex took a deep shaky breath, and felt Sable press a kiss to the top of his head. He was safe, wrapped in the large arms, one broad palm stroking patterns into his back, comforting swirls and stripes. Digging in his pocket, Alex drew out one of his squares, cleaning his face as best he could. "Jade, are you able to listen, really listen now?" Alex nodded, ready for whatever the stabler would say. He'd been honest with the man, he could take the loss now. "Jade, you're wrong. You may have been used, badly and often, but I don't think you've ever given yourself to anyone, have you?" "No, ma- no." The slip was telling, and Sable hugged him tighter for a moment, then spoke softly into the dark hair. "I thought not. So you see, you do not give me a gift grown shabby from many hands. No, you give me something rare and precious indeed, and I do not speak of your virginity, for that is what you are, in every way but the flesh. No, I speak of your heart, your trust, your willingness to open yourself to me. I know how scared you are, how new all of this is to you. And yet, you offer me your hope, your newly discovered soul. There is no more precious gift than that, my little love. It is not your gift which is in doubt, only my worthiness to receive such." Alex was clinging to him now, face buried under Sable's chin, arms tight, uncomfortably so, around Sable's chest. He was almost panting, trying not to shatter under the weight of such wondrous words. "Am I understood, my Jade?" "Yes." Alex choked it out in reply to the whisper, and Sable eased him away, just a bit, needing to see into Alex's face, into his eyes. Sable's dark brown orbs were misty, and the hand that held the side of Alex's face trembled ever so slightly. A kiss, two, a final hard embrace, and then Sable lightly patted Alex on the bottom, urging him to stand. Alex mounted up, wiping a last time at his eyes. He couldn't think, not yet, there was too much to understand, to comprehend, and he was suddenly, despite his earlier nap, tired. "Let's go home, Jade. A good meal and sound sleep will be most welcome." They rode in silence until they were passing the Captain's hut. She was outside cleaning her sword, and she raised a hand to indicate she wanted them to stop. "Is something amiss?" Sable sounded concerned, and she immediately shook her head. "No, 'tis nothing like that. I only wanted a favor. I have some crystals that have come to me from the Sisters, and there are enough to share. Would you mind taking the rest to Fitz for me? I'm eating here tonight, I've some work to do." "Of course." She went into her hut and brought out a small cloth bundle. "Would you like to see them? They're very pretty." She said this to both of them, standing between the horses. Opening the muslin, she revealed six crystals. There was a deep pink stone, very smooth, a jagged white one, a glassy purple, a pale yellowish green crystal and a strong bright blue stone, as well as a smooth pure black. Alex peered at them thoughtfully, knowing they must have some powers, or the Sisters would not use them. "Which do you like for the master, little Jade?" Of its own volition, Alex's hand moved to the rose pink one, hovering above, but not touching. He seemed startled, and looked up quickly. "Very good, blood does tell sometimes, especially fairy blood. And for our lug of a stabler, who thinks them all nuisances to be dug from out a horse's shoe?" This was a tease, and Alex relaxed, seeing it was only for curiosity and not a real testing. He hesitated only a moment between the green and the black, then settled on the black. "Again, very good. And for yourself, young one?" Alex pointed to the purple, and the Captain smiled at him. "Shall I tell you how you did, Little Jade?" Alex bit at his bottom lip, but his natural curiosity got the best of him, and he nodded. "Yes, please, Ma'am." "The pink one that you chose for the master is a talisman of love, all types of love. The onyx, your choice for Sable, is the gem of strength and self-control. For yourself, you chose a stone that sharpens one's visions, shows them more clearly, allows better understanding of what the mind's eye is trying to see. All very excellent choices, especially for one untrained. You haven't been trained, have you?" "No, Ma'am." Alex nearly forgot to be afraid, and his voice was at his usual speaking level. He didn't know how he'd known, unless it was another gifting from the fairy blood. "You have talent, Jade, no little bit of it. You might consider asking the master to give you an apprentice time with Fitz, I think there's more than a little healer within you." "Thank you, Ma'am," Alex murmured, still uncomfortable around this warrior woman, but warmed by her praise. She tied the bundle back, and handed it to Sable, knowing Alex was ready to be away from her. "My thanks, go in peace." "Welcome, and peace to you." Sable said nothing of what had happened with the stones. It was obvious that Alex was completely lost in thought. It was also obvious that he was tired, the day's emotional ebb and tide having worn at him. As they entered the keep, heading for the stables, Sable spoke quietly. "Jade, if you'd like, we could have supper here, in my quarters. I'm going inside, I could get a basket. It's no matter to me, but I thought you might prefer a quiet meal." "I would, thank you. I'll see to the horses." "No, it's your off day. You will pretend you are a guest and hand the reins to the stableboy, then you will wash up and wait for me in my rooms. Not my office, but my rooms. Does that sound acceptable?" "More than acceptable. But you're very bossy, for my off day." It was a light tease, and Sable chuckled. "I'm always bossy. It's just that on your off day, you don't have to do what I say." Alex grinned, and watched as Sable dismounted, giving his reins to Alex. Sable took the empty basket from their noon meal as well as the crystals for Fitz, and headed toward the keep. Leading the horses into the stable yard, Alex handed them to Michael, feeling a touch guilty as he did so. The boy merely smiled at him and led them off to be put away. Seeing the trough, Alex stripped off his cloak, rolling up his sleeves. He washed well, the cold water feeling good to his face, and dried on the cloth hanging from the dowel. Moving into the stable itself, Alex sighed his relief. Home. He was home, and it felt wonderful. Alex slowed as he reached the doors to Sable's private rooms, having long wanted to explore them and now having the chance to do so honestly. Entering, he found things tidy, as expected, and began to explore the small sitting area. Sable's bedroom lay through a doorway beyond, his station granting him two rooms. There were the usual furnishings, but a bit more. A chest, heavily carved from some dark red wood stood against a wall, the saddle that Sable had been working on for months now, atop it. Alex couldn't help a soft smile as he saw it, remembering that first day in the stables, Sable working on the saddle and trying to reassure Alex with the tale of his own past with the master. The saddle was a present for their master, a fact known to everyone but the intended recipient. Running a respectful hand over the buttery soft leather, Alex sighed. There were flowers in an urn, their scent mild, but filling the room. A thick rug was in front of the fire, and a heavy woolen throw across one of the chairs. A book, the place carefully marked by ribbon, lay on the table, and Alex made note of the title, before looking further. There were ribbons and trophies, awards for the horses filling a hutch, and Alex noted that while most bore the name of the master, there were slave awards, too, naming Sable. Alex had reached the archway now, and he peered into the bedroom. The bed was large, nearly twice as big as his own in length, three times the width, and it was on a proper bedstead. Apparently Sable spent his extra monies on luxuries, for not only was the bed worthy of a master, the linens and quilting were rich, a deep berry color, and there were no less than four down pillows gracing the structure. A nightshirt of pale beige flannel was casually tossed across one pillow. Alex pictured the stablemaster wearing it, and little else, and found the picture agreeable. He then thought of Sable in nothing, and gave a hard swallow, quickly turning back to the sitting room. A few moments later, Sable entered the room, a supper basket in hand. Alex helped him set the food out, and after the moment of silence, began to eat. Conversation was minimal, but it was soothing, rather than strained. Alex was feeling much better, still a little tired, but no longer drained. Sable was pleased, glad Alex wasn't genuinely upset by anything from the day. They'd barely finished eating, when a knock sounded. It was the master. Sable motioned for him to enter, standing as he did so. "No, please, keep your seat. I do not mean to interrupt, I only came by to take the collars back." "You aren't interrupting. In fact, I'm glad you're here. I have a confession to make, Master." The hazel eyes saddened, but the man only nodded, readying himself. "Very well. I'm listening." "This afternoon, I called you Moss in front of Jade. I guess we were both too upset to notice, but he heard it. I'm sorry, Master." Lord Fox sighed, rubbing a hand over his mouth in gesture that spoke of weary frustration, then he let his head droop. "I'm not. No, it wasn't your place to share that name with him, but it's only fair that he knows it. Besides, I can hardly punish you for not thinking clearly, when I wasn't either. In more ways than one. I was going to wait and send for you tomorrow, but well, I will ask now. Jade, I would like to speak with you about this morning." Alex darted his eyes to Sable, but was met with a shrug. Seeing that Sable didn't mind, Alex took a drink of his wine, squared his shoulders. "Yes, Master?" "Jade, little one, I am the master here, and as such my word is unassailable, my decisions the law. And like the law, there are occasional lapses. Failures. Jade, I was wrong, this morning. I should not have punished you, not then, not for a single kiss given in that manner. We were alone in a room, it was a safe place, a safe time, and a safe witness. Yes, it was important that you not ever do such again, but you had already learned your lesson, learned it well, your stricken face said as much. I claim to never punish except to teach, and yet I taught you nothing today except that I am only human, and as given to weakness and fear as any man. I am sorry, Jade." The voice trailed off, stopped by regret. The master's face was full of sorrow, and Alex couldn't stand the sight. "Please, Master, do not do this to yourself. If I had erred in this way, you would have said it was a small matter of misjudgement. It was a simple error, Master, you would not want me to grieve over it. Neither must you. I cannot stand to see you sad, Master, please?" Alex had drawn as close as he dared, and now he knelt down, leaning his head against the master's knee. It was an allowable embrace, the only way a slave might show physical affection, unasked, to a master. Alex felt the long fingers of Lord Fox's left hand rest on his head. "Very well, you have made your point, Jade. Stand, please." Alex did, and Lord Fox managed a smile. "I have confessed and apologized. I should like to make an amends, and I think I know what to offer. Jade, when I ran out this morning, I did not go far, merely to the stairs beside the door. I wanted to be sure you were unharmed. You asked Sable why I couldn't love you, or let you love me. With his consent, as my amends, I would explain it to you." Alex saw the master cast a look at Sable that was nearly pleading, and was reassured when the big man smiled gently. "I'm proud of you, Moss. Consent, freely given." The brown eyes held pain, but they were rich with love and pride, and Lord Fox came alive under the look and words, the man coming to the surface, overtaking the master for a heartbeat, before the walls came back in place. "Will that be acceptable to you, Jade?" "Yes, Master, if it is not too much. I...well, I feel this story will hurt you, you and Sable both. In fact, I feel it is nearly the worst tale you have to tell. I would not have you suffer for my sake." "You learn well and quickly, Jade. Yes, it is a hard tale to tell, nearly the worst. Not quite, but nearly so. I will suffer in the telling, as will Sable, but it will be bearable. It is a tale known by many others here, and likely you would come to know it eventually, after a fashion. I would rather you hear it from me, and hear it whole." "As you wish, Master." "Then I will see you on the morrow, after your kitchen time. Now, I have intruded enough. Come, let me take the collars, and I will leave you." Lord Fox reached to his belt, pulling out a small key ring. He fitted the key into the lock, and released Alex first, putting the collar, lock and tag all into a pouch. He did the same to Sable, then turned to leave. "Wait, please." Sable said it quietly, but there was urgency in his tone, and it paused the master. Motioning to Alex, Sable moved into the bedroom. When Alex had joined him, Sable bit his lip, but whispered, "Jade, I know this night was to be ours, just us, and it can still be. But I think he needs to tell you tonight, I know how hard it is for him to tell it, and it would be easier for him to do it now. He's half-way there, to have to stop and start again seems cruel. Still, this is your off day and your choice." "I want to know, Sable. I didn't want to upset you, but I wanted to beg him to tell me now." "Good, then we're agreed. Quickly, before he leaves." They emerged to find that the master had, indeed, begun edging toward the door. "Master, please, there is no need to wait. I would have this finished between us. Please stay, and tell me tonight." "As you wish." It was a mumble, thick with dread, but there was relief, too, and Alex knew this was right, that letting the master speak tonight was a kindness. Lord Fox rang for the errand boy, and handed him the pouch and the basket. "The pouch goes in my study, on the desk. Return the basket to the kitchens, please." The boy repeated, and left. Sable had used the pause to see to the fire, and to light a few candles, now that the even had fallen. He continued to sit on the floor, and Alex took a place across from him. The master poured a cup of water, and came to join them, sitting in the chair. It put him above them, and he bit at his lip, before moving to sit on the floor with them, roughly aligned between the two men. "I know, I shouldn't be on the floor with you like this, it is a decided breach in protocol. There will be many breaches before this tale is told, and I will make no apologies for it. The door is shut, we are alone, I cannot tell this and hold myself high. And, to be completely honest with you both, I am tired. Very, very tired." The man's face showed it, and Alex made a promise within himself to find some way to help this man, to ease his burden. "Sable, this is water. Watch me, no more than two cups of wine." "Yes, Master." "Moss. For the rest of the night, I am only Moss, or as near as I can be. Jade, I will start there, I think, with that name. This is not part of my amends, only something I wanted to share with you. You know the Captain named you? She names all who come here, granting the slave name has been her charge since she arrived. There are many reasons for this, but know that each name holds a meaning, often known only to herself, and we use the name she chooses to both give the slave sanction over their real name, and to work as part of a charm, almost. We repeat the name, and whatever purpose the Captain gave it, begins to fulfill. She is one of the Sisters, so her purpose is only good, her motives pure, do not fear." A sip of the water, and Lord Fox continued. "When I secured her for the post, we discussed this, the naming. My father's method of naming slaves left much to be desired. His names, when he granted them, were often cruel and demeaning. My own name is no exception. I joke that my mother called me such because of my nose, but in truth, my father named me, and it had little to do with my face. The circumstances behind my birth are for another night, but know that I detest being called Fox, and since I will not use my father's name, either, I am usually known at court and by acquaintances as Lord Mulder. I explained this to the Captain, knowing she would need something to call me. She looked at me a moment, then asked if I would give her leave to name me, as well. A private name, a way for those that were close to me to call me other than Master. She told me also that I must decide to accept it before she told me it, and that like it or not, I must use it, once given. It would be a slave name, in the sense that I didn't choose it for myself, but had it given to me, and that I would be forced to answer to it. I agreed, thinking anything better than my Christian name. She took my hand, held hers above it for a long moment, and then told me that my name was Moss." The master smiled fondly as he remembered the moment, and his features softened, his eyes growing lighter. "I thought she named me such for my eyes, but she explained that my eyes were merely a reflection for what was present within my soul. It was the deeper things within my nature that led her to the name. It was true it could be applied to my eyes, but only because they reflected what was within. She then laughed and admitted it did make it easier to remember the name, to associate it with a person. I wanted to know more, but she wouldn't tell me, saying it was a secret of the Sisters, and not to be known by a male. At any rate, my private name, the one I hold dear and share only with a few, is Moss. Sable was the first to know it, Leona knows it, as do Fitz, Lang and Frokey. And now you, Jade. You have my permission, when we are alone, and no one is able to hear us, to call me Moss, if the moment is heavy, or you seek to share your heart." Lord Fox looked up, into Alex's face, and there was a shyness that seemed out of place on his strong, assured master, but very much a part of the man he was seeing tonight. "I should like to hear you speak it, if you would like." "Moss." The word felt good on his tongue, and Alex could see that his master had pleasure in the hearing. A brief quirk of mouth, a thank you, and the man lifted his cup to find it empty. Sable, seeing this, stood, taking it from him. "Water or wine?" There was no title, and Alex knew Sable was acting as a lover, not a slave. "Wine, please. It is time to begin the rest." Sable brought it to him, and as he handed it down, took a moment, to just barely rest the back of his hand against the master's face, a tiny caress very welcome, and the master captured the hand in one of his own, squeezing, then kissing the back of it, before releasing it and turning to his wine. Sable took up his spot again, sitting with his legs bent, arms wrapped loosely around his knees, head slightly bent. The master was leaning against the legs of the chair, long legs sprawled in front of him. Alex had his legs folded in front of him, arms crossed, too. After a long pause staring into the fire, the master began to speak. "Jade, this may wander a bit. I haven't told it often, and I have little practice saying such things aloud, so please, bear with me. My father died, leaving me the master here when I was young, only fifteen. But my training for that came years before. Since I was a babe, my father would tell me that I would one day be master, and that I should learn to do this, or not do that. His list of what I need do was seemingly endless, and there was little pleasing the man, not that I tried much after the first ten years or so. My point is that I have always known slaves, known that I was a master, known that the people I saw around me, that made my home and worked my land and raised my animals, that most of them would one day belong to me. That I had, by virtue of my high birth, been given the option to purchase another human being, to make of them a pet, a toy, a possession. They were mine, to buy and sell, beat and starve, abuse and kill, with none to say otherwise. If I chose to buy a child, and raise it to be a mad dog then kill it for being such, I could do so, and the law would only see injustice if the price were wrong." There was a dark anger, a soul-deep anger in those eyes, and they were staring intently into the fire. "My opinion of slavery was formed early, and by more than I shall tell tonight, for some of it is so painful to me, that only one other person on this earth knows. Suffice it to say that I was forced to examine the issue early, very early. It seems sometimes that I have always known what slavery was, and how I felt about it." He paused here, staring off into the distance, face cold, hard, unassailable. The man's face might have been carved from marble, so devoid of life was it, save for his eyes. The usual gentle swirl of soft browns, greens and yellows was changed to a thunderstorm of dark evergreen, near black and harsh gold. There was hatred in them, hatred like Alex had never imagined seeing in the master. It sent a chill down him, a chill the next words turned into a blast of frigid fear through his heart. "It's wrong. There is nothing about it, nothing that is right or good or just. Slavery is wrong and should be abolished. It must be abolished." Alex couldn't help the gasp. He didn't know much about the law, but even he knew that this was treason, high treason, and punishable by death, and a horrible one. Torture to force a recanting, scourging to purge the soul, and finally burning at the stake as an offering to appease. His throat closed over, suddenly dry, even as his eyes filled with tears, heart pounding. Sable was beside him in an instant, and wrapped Alex up in his arms. Alex could feel Sable's heart pounding against his own, and new that despite Sable's outward control, the thought terrified him, too. "Yes, I know what it is I have said, and what I risk in saying it. The consequences do not change the truth, though, and it is the truth. Had I my way, every slave in the kingdom would be set free, and never again would one man own another. But," and now Lord Fox wilted a bit, the righteous fire settling back into a smolder. "As I have been told since I was a babe, I may not always have my way. It has been a hard lesson for me to learn, and do you ask Leona and Sable, they will tell you I have yet to grasp it completely." The humor was weak, but it was an attempt, and Alex felt his pulse begin to slow, returning to normal. "I am not a fool, Jade, never have I been. I saw early what would happen, did I speak my mind about such things. It would change nothing, I would be dead, the slaves still trapped within their bonds, and hope vanquished. Neither could I simply buy slaves and set them free. I'd seen them, slaves suddenly granted freedom due to death of a master or some such cause. They would arrive looking haunted, not knowing how to care for themselves, often wishing nothing more than to be bought again, in order that they might have some basic of home, food, safety. Oh, not all, some had been taught useful skills and found work, but few people will hire a former slave, do they not come papered, and apprenticeships cost a great deal of money. No, simply setting slaves free is nearly as cruel as owning them in the first place. "And so, when I was twelve, I began to think how I could change things, really change them, and ensure safety for myself and my people. First, though it pained me to do so, I realized that I must know all I could about being a master, all of it. I searched the law libraries and writings, and made my own book full of nothing but the laws and rules governing slavery. Every royal decree, every holy order, every single written word that could be used, I gathered into a volume, made into a bible. All the while, I observed. Bad owners, good owners, I learned from them all, making notes. And, the hardest part surely, was the slave markets themselves. I spent nearly a year in the slave yards, watching, listening. My father, not knowing what use I was making of the lessons, was pleased with me for a change, and told the traders to teach me all they could, anything I asked. I took full advantage, making sure they knew I wished to see things as they really were, not fancied or gentled for my aristocratic tastes. They were to think of me as an apprentice, and once they saw there were no repercussions, they did just that." The master had drained his cup now, and kneeling up, reached to the table, pouring himself another cup, this time of water, making a point to show Sable what it was. Sable nodded, then settled back, leaning against his wooden chest. Alex was still resting in his embrace, though he had turned, so that his back was resting on Sable's chest. It was a comfort, a real one, and Lord Fox smiled as he looked at them. "You make a nice image together. It makes me glad." With a sigh, he seated himself and returned to his tale. "That was the worst. Never had I seen such cruelty, such bleakness. I had expected the beatings, the misery from such horrible conditions. It was the other cruelties that I hadn't even imagined in my worst nightmares. I watched a woman give birth, saw the babe nearly torn from her body, and then she was being loaded into a pen, sold to a brothel and the child taken to another. I don't think she even saw the child, knew if it had been a boy or a girl. It didn't matter, it wasn't her child, it belonged to her master, and he wanted neither of them, not anymore. I had known slaves were used, but I did not know how often, nor how mercilessly the rapes happened. I saw a child, arm broken to the point the bones stuck from his flesh, and not a soul tried to help him, nor had the decency to kill him. His pitiful cries went unheeded for days, until the guards grew tired, and saw him doped. They erred, and he died, to the relief of everyone." Lord Fox's jaw clenched, and then he slowly continued. "As I said, the misery and harshness I expected. The pure lack of any sort of human compassion, less than one would give a wounded animal, I did not expect, and that time still haunts my nights. I was ill, physically ill every night there, but I stayed, and I learned. I had them teach me everything. I learned how to test for aptitude, to sense what a slave's temperament was, what sort of handling was required. They showed me the best ways to secure a slave, to restrain them, depending on what use one would be making of them. I learned to check teeth and muscle. I learned how to check the female slaves for pregnancy, for virginity and disease. I learned to breech the males, check for scarring, tearing, internal sores, to feel the sac for lumping or twisting. And I learned one other thing, something I could not have learned anywhere else, the most difficult lesson of all. I learned how to punish." A deep drink, while a flush of shame appeared on the high cheekbones. "You see, I knew that there could come a time, if I was a master, when I would have no choice but to punish a slave. Eventually, I would find myself standing with a whip, the naked flesh of a slave tied and awaiting my wrath. If I went at it with no experience, it would show. My hatred for the act I could hide, but not my lack of skill. People would see, would know, and they might begin to wonder. Also, I had seen the damage an unskilled hand could cause. The slavers could whip, and while they brought pain, they did little real, permanent harm. They could lay on and not even leave a scar. If I learned to wield a whip as they did, I could perhaps be more lenient, and look more severe. It would minimize what I must do, the pain I must inflict, overall. I convinced them to let me practice on a stuffed form, saying I didn't wish to damage a potential profit. They thought this wise, and so I learned on a bag of silk filled with husks and grain. If I landed the blow too hard, it would tear the silk, like tearing skin. A small tear would reveal only husk, would leave a welt but not a scar. A deeper tear and the grain would spill. That would be a blow to mark, to scar the flesh and muscle." Another pause, and this time, wine filled the cup, only half though, the rest was water. A deep breath, and then the master continued, his voice still quiet, a flat tone, empty and weary. "One day, there was a slave that had done something, I don't remember what. It didn't matter, he might have been innocent even, they usually were. He was to be whipped, and my instructors thought this a good time for me to practice on a real slave. The boy wasn't valuable, he was being sold to the bogs for harvesting, he'd probably not live more than a year. I had little choice. He was going to be whipped anyway, and I did need to practice. It would have seemed odd to them if I had not, so reluctantly, I agreed. But I have done few things more difficult my entire life than unfurling that whip and letting it land, by the force of my own hand, against that child's back." A silent tear trailed down his face, and Alex started to go to him, but Sable's grip tightened, and he shook his head, though his eyes never left his master's. Alex got the impression that he needed to wait, and he relaxed, letting Sable know he would obey. Lord Fox ignored the tear, eyes full of horror and revulsion, shame and hate. "It was different...different than the bag. He cried out, and the screams shook me, I had to fight to concentrate. The boy moved, h-he squirmed under the lash the way a bag could not, and my blows fell different than they were intended. Of the ten blows ordered, four of them cut very deeply, having either missed their target due to his writhing and my inexperience, or simply having been landed too hard, the lash finding the bone under the skin and making it tear harder. The slavers were pleased enough, told me that I had a good hand, just needed more time and practice. From then on, for the next two months, if a slave had to be whipped, they were given to me. I learned, oh gods, did I learn, as quickly as I could, trying with all my might to get the feel, to figure out the angle, to modify my swing. I don't know how many slaves I whipped in two months, the oldest one an ancient, the youngest a lad of seven whole summers. I whipped girls not yet into their cycle and women nearly on the childbed. It was easily a hundred slaves, likely more. If I die and go to hell, it will be only justice for those two months." The master paused, swallowing hard despite his drink. "But I learned. After those months, I continued to practice, once a week, on the bags. I added stiff pieces of leather, to simulate bone, and put the whole on a clock mechanism, so that it would move. A thin skin of cheap wine, thickened, under the silk and husk gave me blood, and now, I had a realistic target. Of course, while I was still with the slavers, I continued to punish the slaves as well. Not all of them, I couldn't and wouldn't do that anymore, but one or two a month, for the remainder of my time there. They expected it, and I improved each time. I still practice, once every few months. I go to the woods, alone, with one of my father's whips, and a practice bag. My skills have improved, these many years. I can now tear the layer of silk off the bag completely, without disturbing the skin of blood underneath. Of course, the bags don't scream, but I remember the sound well enough, the shock of it, the way it cut the air. I-it doesn't bother my aim anymore..." The tears were a stream now, and the man was shaking violently. Sable released Alex, and was beside the master in a heartbeat. He took Lord Fox into his arms, holding tightly, rocking back and forth as though the man were a child. Alex saw the struggle within his master, the body stiff and unyielding, heard Sable's agonized plea. "Moss, for god's sake, please! Let me, Moss, just let me!" And then the master crumpled, sobbing against Sable's broad chest, winding his own arms desperately around his slave, his beloved. Alex, frozen with what he'd heard and what he was seeing, sat for a long time. He was overcome again by gratitude to his gentle master. The man would do whatever it took, Alex had known that already, but to hear the extent of his cruelty, and know the mercy behind it, was nearly too much to bear. At last, he blinked rapidly, returning to himself enough to move, if slowly. He fetched a cloth and cool water, a flannel square from the neatly folded pile he'd seen in Sable's bedroom, and hurried back. Kneeling beside the two men he adored, Alex held out the flannel square. "May I?" The master had regained some control of himself now, and he nodded. With Sable's arms still firmly around Lord Fox, Alex tenderly wiped the handsome face, his touch as gentle as he could make it, then held it to the long nose. The master obligingly blew, and then Alex used the cool wet cloth to bathe the face, boldly smoothing the hair off the forehead with his fingertips. "Thank you," the master whispered, and Alex smiled at him. "You're welcome, Moss." This prompted Lord Fox to reach out a hand, taking Alex's face in his palm, and then pulling the man close. Alex carefully added his embrace to Sable's, knowing that he would likely never be allowed to hold the master so again. He felt Sable's arms atop his own, and savored the threefold hug, trying to memorize every second of it with his senses. Too soon, much too soon, Lord Fox was pulling away from them, a warm smile of gratitude and love on his face, but pulling away. He stood, pouring himself another cup of water. "I think we should pause there for a moment. We'll return to this woeful tale after a brief trip outdoors. I need to see the stars and breathe some night air. I'll come back, I promise." He said this to Sable, but didn't meet the man's eyes. The master stumbled slightly as he walked, his normal grace absent, the shoulders stooped. When he'd gone, leaving his slaves staring after him with frustrated worry, Alex asked quietly, "Is it too much for him, Sable? Should we stop him, there? He doesn't owe me this, it's a punishment for him, not an amends to me. Is it healing, like with Fitz?" "He hurts, Jade, he hurts and he seldom takes comfort. I think he needs to do this, tonight, tell you everything, torture himself with the past, to allow himself to take comfort now. It is healing for him, but not like with Fitz. With him, it's like lancing a boil to drain the poison. With the master, it's like waiting for a blister to burst. Prick it to force the draining, and it only remains raw. Let it swell, burst on its own, and then you can treat it, heal the open skin. Come, he'll have hidden by now. We'll see to our needs, then wait for him back here." They did so, each man taking a different part of the fence line. The master was nowhere to be seen, but Alex trusted his word that he'd be back. Returning to Sable's rooms, Alex stretched, got himself a drink and then looked to the fire. Sable had already returned, and now the stabler came in from his bedroom. He'd taken off his knife belt, put his keys and such away, and his shoes had been replaced by woolen slippers. They looked very comfortable, and Sable noticed the envy in Alex's face. "You could put your things on the table, they'll be safe. And I've an extra pair of slippers, do you wish." "Thank you, I will." Alex quickly changed, so that he was wearing only shirt and leggings, his feet in the looser, softer slippers. "These are nice. I should get a pair. Do I buy them from the seamstress or the weavers?" "Seamstress. The weavers are for large items, throws, blankets." Alex bit his lip, then had to ask. "Sable? Are you sure this is right, letting him hurt like this?" "It's right." The voice was the master's, and Alex turned, seeing that the master had taken a moment to change and unburden as well. "I know it sounds and looks awful, but it needs told, Jade, and I will be better for the telling. Sometimes, you must stir up a demon, in order to slay it." "I know nothing of slaying demons, Master, though I've killed more than a few men." The words slipped out, and Alex held his breath, but the news did not seem to shock either Sable or the Master. "We will listen, when you're ready, Jade. But know that what happened to you before will not be used against you now. Only what you do here, do I judge you for." Alex wanted to believe that, was desperate to have it be the truth, but he only nodded faintly to show he'd heard. "But not tonight. Tonight we are airing my sins, my past. If you are ready, I'll continue." They settled back onto the floor, Alex still unused to furniture and uncomfortable within it, Sable used to working from the floor, treating the horses, and the Master simply needing to be as they were, for a bit longer. "I learned everything I could, and then I stopped, and thought about it all. It took some time, but I began to see a way to change things. It would be slow, very slow, and would affect only a few slaves at a time, but that couldn't be helped. It was the only way, without drawing attention to myself or my cause. My cause, which is to eventually end slavery within the entire kingdom. I had to find a way to buy, train, educate and free slaves, all without breaking a single law. And more, convince others to do the same, all without violating the law. I will not risk any of my people, nor dare I risk myself, not yet. And so, I began simply enough, with my own personal slaves. "Before my father died, I owned three slaves. One of them was Leona. She was given to me as a child, she was my nursemaid, a job she has never given over. Frokey was another, given to me as bodyguard, required by my high birth. Don't let his unusual personality fool you, he is dangerous, and not to be trifled with lightly, was even more so when he was younger. The third was Lang. He was my errand boy, personal servant and occasionally, my whipping boy, though I cost him only three whippings in some seven years, so that is not too bad, I hope. Of course, I was aided in that by the fact that my father had no qualms about me taking my own whippings. It was only my tutors that had restraint." A rueful grin appeared, and Alex got an image of the sober faced child he must have been, could see him wracked with guilt as Lang bore his punishment. "I ramble, my apologies. I owned three, and I began with them. I had told them of my plans, all three of them, knowing I would need the help to make the changes, without being caught. And knowing that they would each give their life to keep my secret, without a second thought. We watched each other, corrected each other, and finally, the groundwork was in place. I began simply enough, a tiny change here, mostly cosmetic, a change there. At times, my father would notice, but I could honestly say that I had broken no laws, and that I would find my own path to mastery. He hated it, had grown to hate me, but there was little he could do save punish me for defiance. Others put my odd ways down to that as well, spite from a son to his father, so I was able to continue. I was laying the stones, readying for the day in the future when I would have a large keep of my own, and could test my methods. But then my father died years before expected, and suddenly, instead of three slaves, I had sixty-two. It was tempting to change everything, immediately, but I knew that would not work, knew I could do nothing until I had established myself as the master, in every way, not just in name. It could be no mere title, anyone that spoke to one of my slaves had to be completely convinced that I was a master not to be trifled with, that I was firmly in control of myself, my holdings and my slaves." Shifting position, the master propped an elbow on the seat of the chair, and his head in his hand. "I struggled some, that first year. I was still so young, almost too young, and despite my grand ideas and moral beliefs, I was worried it wouldn't work. I was afraid the slaves wouldn't accept me, would rebel or worse. A few did. I sold three slaves that first year, handed out more punishments than I cared to, and allowed no slack, from anyone." With that, he looked at Sable from the corner of his eyes. "I told him," Sable murmured softly, not wanting to interrupt, but wanting to let him know. "Good. Then you know I was eventually successful. A couple of years later, things were beginning to be the way I'd envisioned them, better even. I could start to buy slaves, and I knew the ones I wanted to buy first. The ones that were the most in danger. I wanted children. I wanted to save as many of the young as I could, give them a life for death. But to do that, I needed homes. I couldn't raise these children on my own, and that was what had to happen, they had to be loved, cherished, brought up with a sense of their own worth and value. So I looked for families, for older slaves that could learn a skill, that would want to build a life for themselves and a child. Then I began to search for the ones that had spark, something within them that said, despite everything they had suffered, they could be saved. The ones that I felt had a gift to give, a purpose to serve. I used my experiences with the slavers well, and taught Frokey and Lang what to look for as well. Frokey's got the better eye for mining the survivors, Lang for finding children and families. You were one of my survivors, Jade. My best one yet. The first time I heard you laugh out loud, I nearly wept for joy. I know I shouldn't, but I cannot but wish to hold you up to the world as an example of what can be, instead of what is. You make me very proud, little one." Alex felt his lip tremble but kept himself pulled together. "Thank you, Moss." It was thick with emotion, but Alex didn't dare stop the master from talking. It had been an hour already, and he had the feeling there was still much to tell. "Welcome. Now, as I divert course again, my apologies. Let me get a cup of wine, for we have come to the crux, and I shall, at last, answer your question." "A half-cup, Moss." "Yes. Of course, thank you, Sable." The master poured the half-cup, adding water to make a full one, and Alex noticed the faint tremble to his hands. Sable, too, was obviously dreading the next part, and suddenly, something the master had told Alex once, long ago, came back to him. "Sable is the one. The slave you slept with, to save his life, it was Sable."Alex had spoken softly, thinking out loud, not realizing at first he'd spoken his thoughts. Now, he paled as he saw the hurt and confusion in the eyes of both men. "You told him?" they asked in unison, pain obvious. "No! No one told me anything, I swear. The master told me when I first got here that he didn't sleep with slaves, had only done so once and that was to save the slave's life. He didn't even tell me if it was a man or a woman. But I see the way you look at each other, touch each other. I've known you were in love, one with the other, since the second day here. And now, when I saw that you were nearly as bothered by the next part as he was, I saw it as the reason. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say it aloud like that. I swear to you both, by the goddess, neither of you has said anything to me." Both men had relaxed as Alex explained, and now he waited, holding his breath, for the reaction. It was not what he expected. The master began to chuckle. Sable, after a moment, followed suit. Soon they were both laughing, however weakly. "Oh, Jade, sweet Jade..." The master trailed off, shaking his head, and Alex could stand the tension no longer. "Please, I'm sorry. Don't be angry with me, please?" He was talking to them both, and Sable held out his arms. Alex, for once, didn't move into them, not wanting to hurt the master more. "Hush, Jade. We aren't angry, I promise you that." "Sable's right, we aren't angry. You took us unawares, that is all, and now we find that despite our care, a wounded, sick, confused frightened creature took one look at us and knew that we had feelings for each other. It's more than a little annoying to be so glass-like." Lord Fox looked at him kindly, and motioned with his head. "Go to him, Jade, let him hold you. It honestly doesn't do anything but make me happy to see you together." Alex moved then. Sable had stood, and now he picked Alex up, carrying him easily over to a bench. It was solid, easily holding them both, and Alex felt again the deep comfort of sitting in Sable's lap. "I'm sorry..." Sable silenced him with a kiss, just a brief touch of his lips, but Alex felt it through his entire body. "No more apologies. You're guilty of nothing, save being very observant and very smart, neither of which is a crime, especially not at Samstar Fields." "True enough. We've more than our share of bright, observant people. Makes life interesting, if occasionally difficult. Feeling better, Jade?" "Yes, thank you. I'm fine now." "Then I'll continue, for it grows late and I grow weary of talking. I would be done with this." The master settled into a chair across from them, and resumed. "Yes. You are right. It was just before my eighteenth birthday. By then, Samstar Fields was much as you see it now, only small in scale and scope. But everything was running smoothly, the slaves had adjusted to me as master, the village had accepted me, the stables were beginning to show profit, and I was beginning to breathe again. It was time of peace and hope, everything I'd worked for coming to fruition. But I had forgotten one thing, one very important thing. We did not exist on an island. Oh, granted, people had come and gone, there had been diplomatic visits, business guests, and of course, the church had sent their representatives. A night or two and they were gone, impressed with the food, the thickness of the blankets, the order they saw. But we had not yet had a visit from anyone that really knew how things were before, knew my family, and had reason to find fault." The master was standing by the outer wall, looking out the small window, eyes searching the night sky. It was something he did often, Alex had noticed, a habit that seemed to give him comfort. He walked the grounds nightly, Alex had seen him more than once during his midnight talks with the goddess. He seemed comforted now, and his voice was steadier as he continued. "We received word that we would be visited by my cousin, a man of outward civility. But he was cruel, cold, a vicious man. He and my father were two of a kind, and as such, they had entered into many successful business arrangements, yet there was a deep and abiding hatred between them. When my father died, my cousin had sent his condolences, and a carefully phrased threat. If he should find any lacking, any weakness in me, he would not hesitate to use my youth as an excuse to take everything I owned. He didn't say it like that, of course, but it was what he meant. I had only been spared his interference this far because he was given a task overseas, by the King, and had been gone these past few years." Lord Fox turned from the window and returned to sit in a chair by the fire. He was in profile to Alex, attention on the flames before him. "He was back now, and I was his first order of business. He'd sent the notice, but it had been mysteriously delayed, arriving only a few scant hours before he did. I'd called for Frokey, Lang and Leona, had warned them that the Arch Duke was coming, and they began preparations at once. Fortunately, things run smoothly here, and when his company arrived, he must have been vexed indeed to find us ready to receive the King himself. He hid it behind a well-mannered smile, his clean hands and shining nails held out to take my own in a gesture of familial warmth. I would as soon have given my hand to a rabid beast." Alex slipped from Sable's lap, taking a spot beside him on the bench, turning that he might see the master better. One of Sable's arms stayed about him, and Alex leaned into it, feeling the big man's need for a connection. "I bade him welcome, saw him installed on the ground floor chambers, and obliged him with a tour. It was while we were touring that I realized I had forgotten something about him, something crucial. We were in the stables, he wanted to see for himself the horses he was hearing about. A mare had just foaled, and Sable was finishing with the delivery. It had been successful but there was the usual mess. Sable had his shirt off, and he was smeared with blood, his hands and arms, his chest, his stomach, even his face was streaked. He was sweating and filthy and dripping gore, and as he came around the stall, heading for the trough, my cousin saw him. There was lust, a dark, evil hungering in his gaze. It was a look that spoke of greed, of violence, of cruel use, and it was directed at the man I was beginning to hold most dear." The hands holding the cup tightened, the knuckles going white, and a muscle began to twitch in the lean jaw. Anger and jealousy warred with revulsion, and Alex bit at his lip, sure he didn't want to hear the rest of this. "It was then I remembered what had first made me hate this man, distrust him so. I was eleven, and my father had whipped me for being defiant, yet again. It was one of the worse whippings I ever got, for we had fought about my mother, and his switch had drawn blood with every stripe. I was in the kitchens, being tended by Leona, we had no healer at that time. I was lying on the table, a towel for modesty, the kitchen girls sent away. Leona had just begun to bathe me, had done no more than the stripes on my neck, when he came in. He sent her away at once, and she obeyed, but only so that she could summon help. I tried to rise, but he put a hand on my shoulder, pressing me down lightly. His skin stung on my cuts, but I managed to hold my pain. I hadn't cried for my father, I wouldn't cry for him. He looked at me, I was striped from my neck to my ankles, the blood a slow drip, and when he spoke, I wanted to be sick. "He laughed first, a low, ugly sound. 'It seems your father does not spare the rod, boy. And that he knows well how to use it.' I said nothing, and he ran a finger down my back. I bit my lip to keep from yelling, and he sensed it, chuckling again. He held the finger out to me, coated with my blood. 'Such a fascinating color, don't you think? Boys are always better with a bit of blood about them. It makes them so much smarter, so much more amenable, flexible. It eases the passage of manhood, so to speak.' I was an innocent still, but not ignorant, and I grasped his meaning well enough. 'Tell me, boy, has your father made good use of you yet? Or are you still fresh under all this tempting juice?' His hand went to the towel, and snatched it away. His hand was on my back now, and I felt him pinning me down, crushing me to the table. I was but eleven, no strength to match that of his single arm. He began to draw my legs over the edge of the table, parting them with his own. He would have taken me right then, in my father's house, had not Frokey intervened." A faint grin quirked his mouth, but Alex heard the sniffle too. "Frokey knew better than to fight the man, knew it would mean his life. Instead, he made a big show of coming in with about three other men, yelling for Leona, demanding to know where their food was, raging in a group around us, as though they hadn't seen us. He released me, of course, unsure who was actually coming in. When the Arch Duke turned to them, furious at the interruption, they made an equally big show of apologizing, kneeling abjectly, while Leona slipped in the back, got me off the table and hid me in the caves. No one outside Samstar Fields knows of the caves, and we keep it that way apurpose. It took her only a moment to hide me, and when he turned back, we were gone. Frokey took the blame, of course, a fist to the head and a few enraged kicks, but it was too late. I never gave him such a chance again, and while I hadn't forgotten the incident, as the years passed, I had forgotten the catalyst. Blood. The man was driven mad by the sight of it. I know now that it is his method to bite a wound in the neck to suckle while dry raping until the blood pours. He, too, has improved with practice over the years." "Moss, don't." Sable made it a whispered scold, and the master accepted it as such, nodding. "You're right. I divert, yet again. Or rather, delay." Pulling himself together, the master scrubbed a hand over his face, and took another drink from his all but forgotten cup. "So, the Arch Duke saw Sable, and the blood lust was visible. The man scented like a hound, and moved to stand beside the trough, watching Sable wash. 'A shame, the red suits his coloring so well.' I knew then that Sable was in danger, and fully intended to hide the man. Sensing my purpose and, I suppose, my interest easily enough, he turned to me. 'Is he your bedslave, boy? Do I encroach?' I was too ignorant to see the trap. I assured him Sable was mine, that he was reserved for my personal use. 'A pity. Still, it should prove entertaining. You are not of age yet, and with no father to guide you, I must see to my duty. I claim first watching. I trust you have no problem with that?'" Alex closed his eyes, had seen the trap coming. First watching, that ancient tradition whereby a father or elder male would literally oversee a coupling, to ensure that it reached full completion. It was usually reserved for important political marriages, to make sure there could be no annulment later, but the law was open to any coupling. "Goddess and Christ-be-damned bastard," Alex swore softly, and found two pairs of eyes staring at him openly and with a faint hint of amusement, despite the very sober topic. "I have never heard you swear before, little one. You do it well." The master gave a low chuckle, and Alex flushed, but knew his sentiment was appreciated. "Do not say such about him again, Jade, he is nobility." "No, master." "Besides, that's too mild. He's much worse than that. But yes, he was claiming his right. And I had no choice, either take Sable to my bed in front of him, or give Sable to him outright, and that I could not do. I thanked the Arch Duke politely for his interest in me, and assured him I had no problem with it at all. He smirked, turned back to Sable, running his hand over the wet skin of his chest, pinched him, then strolled back toward the keep." The master paused, inhaling sharply, and swallowing hard several times, regaining control. "Sable had the good sense to go still and silent, looking at nothing but the ground. He didn't react, that I could see, to suddenly be claimed as my bedslave, nor did he even flinch at my cousin's touch, but I saw the way his hands flexed, the stain of shame on his face. Worse, I saw the resignation in his eyes. And I knew right then, that no matter how careful I was, no matter if I could manage to give him pleasure, no matter how much he cared for me even, what was going to happen was rape, nothing less. If he went to his knees and begged me to take him, it would still be rape, for one simple reason. He had no choice. He could not refuse any touch, any endearment, any demand I would make on his body. If I were to take him as brutally as a dark trade whore or softly as a beloved virgin child bride, it would make no matter, for the simple fact that he did not have the right to refuse me. No, no matter what we did, how it started or how it ended, Sable, as my slave, could not say no, and that would make it rape." Sable was shaking his head, as though to deny silently what he could not say aloud, but to Alex, it seemed to only prove the master's point. Sable might disagree, might have, in his heart, gone willingly to the Master's bed, but that was simply a matter of convenience. It made it easier, made it nicer, but in the end, it was irrelevant. In Alex's newly found understanding of morals and ethics, the master was right. It was rape. "The pain of that was nearly more than I could manage. I wasn't proud of the things I'd had to do while at the slavers, but never had I played the part so far as to rape. I could hide behind fastidiousness, behind my youth, there are many acceptable reasons for not taking common slaves for a bedslave. Never, never had I imagined that I would be forced to this. The fact that I felt for Sable, thought he felt for me as well, despite the difference in our ages, made it all the worse. Still, I had no time to dwell, there were plans to be made, and I needed to make them quickly. But first, I had to tell him what was happening. I explained what he hadn't heard for himself, and then I asked him if he'd ever been with a man, in that manner. He couldn't speak, couldn't answer me with words, only shook his head. In that, I had the advantage." "A single afternoon's fumbling in a hayloft between two bored youths at court," Sable said quietly, but there was anger in his voice, sorrow and regret. The master looked up, shocked, and Sable nodded, standing to pour himself a drink. "That was the extent of your advantage, Moss. I didn't know it at the time, didn't find out for years after, but it's true. And that afternoon was limited to touching each other with hands. You were every bit as much the virgin as I was, and only a boy." Alex looked from Sable to the master, knowing he was missing something, but unable to figure out what. "Yes, and you were a man, fully grown, a man that had never even thought of another man in that manner! You were not born into your slavery, you were tricked into it, you were a freeman and a minor noble by birth, trained to be a righteous, God-fearing individual. I have always known where my preferences lay, my father condemned me for a sodomite before I was old enough to know the organ had a purpose beyond piss, and the church I have never loved. Besides, it was the only thing I could think of to make it better." He'd started out as suddenly angry as Sable had been, but now his voice ended on a choke, and Sable closed his eyes, sighing wearily. The silence stretched between them, both men gone still, eyes closed, jaws locked, hands clenched into fists. "I don't understand." Alex hated to speak, but he sensed they were near the culmination. The master didn't move, but dutifully resumed speaking. "No, you wouldn't, not yet. I told Sable what time to meet me, and left him there to find Leona. I had no idea what to do, how to make it be anything but what it was. She listened, nearly as sickened as I had been. But she is a strong woman, with a sharp mind. She had but one idea, still, that was one more than I had owned. It was a good one, but would require care on our part. She called Lang, and we quickly gave him a lengthy and detailed message to give to Sable. He did so, and that night, after the meal, the Arch Duke suggested we begin. It seems he was an early riser, and so, liked to sleep early, as well. "I led him to my chamber, bidding him enter. Sable was already in position, kneeling by the bed, head down. He was naked, heavily oiled, and there was but one candle and the fire for light. Lang stood against the foot of the bed, his back to us. When I snapped, Lang moved at once to undress me. I tried to look bored, but I was sure the man could hear my heart pounding from across the room. A quick glance showed me that he was paying no heed to me. His eyes were solely on Sable, the Arch Duke was instantly inflamed, as I had hoped. Once I was undressed, Lang moved back to the footboard, eyes turned from us. The Arch Duke was shaking with his desire for Sable, and I prayed that Leona's plan would work. Yawning, I snapped, and Sable stood." Sable had moved, now standing behind the master, eyes again closed, arms crossed tightly around himself. His chin was resting on his chest, his shoulders hunched. Sable looked like he'd lost a fight, never had Alex seen him so compressed, so tightly wound into himself. Lord Fox didn't look much better in his chair, arms tightly crossed, shoulders hunched even more tightly than Sable's. His eyes were unblinking pools of pain. "The Arch Duke couldn't be fooled completely, he would have to see me penetrate. When Sable asked how I wanted him, I told him to lie on his side. This made sense, he was taller than me then, quite a bit taller, and heavier besides. It was that or missionary, and I wasn't strong enough to hold his legs. It would have been uncomfortable for me, anyone could see that. Willing my voice not to break, I enquired politely as to whether the Arch Duke could see well enough, inviting him to move to the best spot. He tried, he honestly did, but I had chosen his position myself. My bed has two sides against the wall. I had Lang at the foot, a large chest as well, and I put Sable on the inside, his back to the wall. No matter how close he got, he could touch only me, and if he were going to watch the actual taking, he would need to stand so that Sable's face was hidden by the pillows. In short, I would fulfill the letter of the law, he could not cry foul. He was so mad with lust, he scarcely noticed. The firelight was turning Sable's skin red, gleaming in the oil I'd had him apply. I looked at Lang's hand, nearly hidden in the bed curtain. He held up a finger, bent in half." Sable poured the master a cup of wine, handing it out silently. "I've had two." "Have three." It was accompanied by the merest hint of a gentle smile, and Lord Fox took the cup gratefully, drinking deeply before continuing. "That meant that his check of the Arch Duke's erection showed him half-hard. It was easy to see, the man had actually unfastened his breeches on his way through the door. I reached for Sable, and kissed him. I could feel the tremors running through him, the shock of being so intimate, especially with another man, for the puerile interest of another, but he remembered my instructions, lying still as I touched him, caressed him, keeping his eyes closed. A few moments of this and Lang showed me a finger pointing fully. It was my cue, and I tapped Sable's top leg. He raised it, and I spared a prayer to any god listening that the ointment would work. I remembered what I'd learned at the slavers, and I breached him as though it happened nightly. A wince, an aborted flinch, and I was inside him completely, one stroke to rid us both of our virginity. "I could hear the panting of my cousin, and as I withdrew, I made a show of shuddering. I called Lang, had him pull up the sheet to our waist. When my cousin protested, I reminded him that he had seen the penetration, all that was necessary, and that did he wish to stay and see the rest, he'd best allow me to keep warm. He subsided, angry, but too gone in his need to see Sable to fight me. We resumed, with one minor change. Using the sheet as a distraction, I had pulled out of Sable, and now, when we moved, it was Sable penetrating me. I held my breath to see if my cousin would notice, but between the threat of leaving and the business with the sheet, he didn't notice the switch." "This is what you were fighting about earlier." Alex understood now. "Yes. He thinks it was a senseless sacrifice on my part, since he'd already been violated. I feel it was the only right thing I could have done, to apologize and make amends. I had a choice, I took it." The master's eyes were slightly glassy, and Alex knew that he was becoming intoxicated. Not drunk, not yet, but three cups was apparently his limit. "So, it worked. I used my hand on myself to reach completion, an eye on Lang's hand, when it showed me a thumb instead of a finger, I knew the Arch Duke had found his satisfaction, and reached my own as soon as possible. Sable had been watching too, and did his best to match my timing, knowing he'd need to show himself spent. I gave the order and spilled, carefully smearing it on Sable's groin and stomach. He'd managed to follow me, and gave every appearance of a well-ridden slave. I motioned to the wash basin and he drew down the sheet, cleaning my organ carefully, and then wiping his own, and his stomach. He put the cloth back in the basin, and covered me again with the sheet. My cousin congratulated me on a successful coupling, adding that he knew my father would have been most proud, and he left. Lang waited by the door until it was clear, then he left as well. "I got out of bed, dressed, and went into my sitting room, locking the bedroom door first. I kept a long bench there, and it was there that I spent the night. I didn't sleep. I know Sable didn't either, he was too still. At dawn, he dressed and left, being sure to be seen leaving by one of the Duke's men. He went directly to the stables, got a horse and rode to the village, hiding in the guard rooms, a letter saying that he was to be given shelter there on my orders, and protected with the life of every man there. The Arch Duke lingered two more days, but I explained that Sable was not expected back for another week at least, and he finally gave up. He left the next day, reassured that I would not back down from him or from any challenge he put forth. He hasn't bothered us since." The master drained the cup, looking at the empty vessel blankly. "I have not taken a slave to my bed since. Nor will I." "It wouldn't be the same." Sable offered it gently, his face pleading with the man he loved. "Until you have a choice, it is the same. No matter how willingly you come to me, you have not the right to refuse, that makes it rape. It is the same." Alex's brows drew together, and he shook his head. "No, master, you're wrong. It can't be the same, not without the Arch Duke present." Sable and Lord Fox both looked at him as though he were professing to be the Messiah. Shaking his head to clear it, the master asked cautiously, "What do you mean?" "You have said that a lack of choice is what makes it rape. You have said also that you had no choice but to bed Sable, the Arch Duke would have claimed him and his life for forfeit, had you refused. That means you were raped, too. The Arch Duke raped both of you. You were no more guilty of rape than Sable when he took you in turn. He was complying with your orders, just as you were under orders from the Arch Duke. In that moment, Master, you were simply another slave, following orders for the pleasure of another, more powerful master. You were an instrument of rape, to be sure, but you were not the rapist." Another thought occurred to him, and he continued. "Sable, you told me that you had your freedom price, many times over. Why do you not simply pay it and be free? The master would let you stay, and then you would be two free men." It was Sable's turn to look anguished, and his voice came out a pain-filled roar. "I can't!" He took a deep breath, trying to regain control. Lord Fox reached out a hand for him, but Sable shook his head, unable to accept it until this was done. "Jade, you remember I told you about the Earl that kidnapped me, sold me? That he claimed all my holdings, knowing I was safely out of harm's way, presumed dead? Well, he did one other thing to ensure his future. He convinced the court that, as I was only presumed dead, there was a chance I could return. Not wanting to risk another uprising, they agreed to give him a modified writ of execution. It says that if I should ever be found, as anything but a slave, I am to be executed immediately as an enemy of the state. I'm no threat to him as a slave, I can own nothing, hold no property, make no claims, have no justice. The minute I become a freeman, I'm dead." "You could hide, we could falsify the records..." This was obviously an old argument of the master's, for there was the same desperate edge Sable's voice had held earlier. "And risk everything you've worked for, your whole life? Risk the lives of everyone here, risk Samstar Fields? What's more, it would risk your life. Your life! How could I do that, Moss? Even if I were that selfish, how could I claim to love you, and do that? No, Moss. I'll live the rest of my life a slave, before I'll do that. Unless we manage by some miracle to get that paper from the Earl, until I hold it in my hands along with my original bill of sale, proof that I was sold into my bondage illegally, I will remain here, as a willing slave. So long as I have you for Master, it's enough." But it wasn't, not by half. They both knew it, it was why they struggled so now. Yes, they would live like this forever, before one risked the other. Alex, knowing Sable was right, the risk was too great, closed his eyes, begging Danally silently for wisdom, for an answer. If only he knew more about such things, but he knew so little. He didn't even know the everyday things, common things. Just yesterday he'd had to ask Marita what a phrase meant... Thinking of his conversation yesterday made him catch his breath with hope. He might have it wrong, Alex had no idea if it would even relate, but it could do no harm to ask. "As for choice and rape, Master, Marita says a woman has not the right to refuse her husband conjugal duty. If that is true, then is every act of sexual union in a marriage rape, even if the man and wife love each other, and come to each other for mutual pleasure?" Sable was staring intently at the master, one fist pressed tightly to his mouth. The Master's face was a study of confusion, of yearning and disbelief at war with hope. At last, after a silence that seemed to stretch for an eternity, the master spoke. "I am a fool. I am a complete and utter fool." He looked dazed, stunned, and now he stood, turning to face Sable. "Do you love me?" The voice was quivering violently, as was the body, and Sable, equally unstable, answered without hesitation. "I do." "Do you want me?" "More than air." "Will you forgive me? For the wasted years? For the anguish I have caused us both through my need to keep you safe, even from myself?" "Forgiven." "Then come to me, for I do love you, too, and I have wanted you since the moment I first saw you." Both men were crying, and now so was Alex, as he watched them move toward each other, hands reaching out as though in a dream, and then holding, holding each other close, so close and so tightly that they lost their balance and fell to the ground. There on the thick rug, with the firelight and a roomful of candles, they kissed, really kissed, for the first time. It was the most beautiful thing Alex had ever seen and he felt humbled to witness it. He also felt his soul weep, for watching them, seeing them like this, Alex knew that he had no part. Not yet, at any rate. It wasn't that he didn't love them, he did, more than ever. And Alex knew Sable loved him in return. Not with the ferocity and depth of his love for Moss, but Sable did honestly love him. The master...the most Alex could do yet was believe that the master did have some feelings for him beyond the love he felt for everyone. Again, the sincerity of their claims to him were not in doubt. But Alex knew that in the face of what the two men would be sharing for a while, his newfound sense of himself would be lost. He simply wasn't strong enough yet, sure enough to withstand the overwhelming love and joy flooding from the other two men. Alone with Sable, the quiet gentle affection and love he'd been given thus far, was manageable, as was the affection from the master. What he was seeing was the strongest, purest, surest love Alex had ever known. He was honest enough to admit that it was too much. It frightened him, made him uncomfortable, simply because it was so overwhelming. Silently, he began to steal from the room. He'd made it to the doorway, when his name was called. Turning, he looked at them both, faces alive with love and relief, with joy at the thought of union, of expressing, at long last, what had lain in their hearts. "Master, Sable, please, I have something I must tell you." Hating to spoil their moment, but knowing he must make this clear between them as soon as possible, Alex shared what was in his heart. He saw the trace of pain in the master's eyes, the stronger smudge of it in Sable's, but Alex could also tell that they understood. "Please, you must believe me, you do me no hurt by this. Honestly, I swear by my love for the Goddess, I am overjoyed to see you touch, to hear you say words you've held back for too long. It is not pain that bids me go, but respect for this moment, for both of you." The master spoke first, his voice a bit raspy and still shaky, but warmer than Alex had ever heard it before. "Jade, I have no words left, none good enough to thank you. But you need not leave. If we have each other, then we have you to thank. You are welcome to stay." "Are you speaking as the master or as Moss?" "Moss, only Moss tonight." This was met by a kiss from Sable, the new freedom to do so making his heart pound like the smith's hammer. Lord Fox smiled at him, really smiled, all the way to his eyes. "Then I have a choice. And I say no. Thank you, but no. Not yet. It is too soon, you need each other for a while. I do not doubt your feelings for me, Sable, and I begin to concede that you might have some care for me as well, Moss. But now is not the time. I beg of you, please, be alone, be together, alone for a while. Then, do you still find you want or need me, come to me, and I will think on it. I want this, I want it more than anything I've wanted, save my freedom. That means I dare not risk it to haste. And neither should you risk each other. You have many years to make up for, and a future as full of new things as my own. It should be enjoyed completely, and savored." Alex paused, sniffling, but knowing he was doing what love demanded he do. "I have at least a year yet, before I earn my freedom price, I shall be here, if and when the time is right." He grinned, to take any sting from it for Moss, then grew serious again. "You say you owe me thanks. I disagree. Still, do you insist you owe me gratitude, then show it by doing this for me, for yourselves. I love you both, with my whole heart, but I am not ready, tonight has shown me this clearly. I am not ready for this yet. I have much healing to do, still. Give me that time, and make use of it to heal each other, as well. Please?" "As you wish. But before you go, I would ask a favor," Lord Fox said. Both men were now standing, the master wrapped up in Sable's arms, and delighted to be there. "Anything. I would do anything, for either of you." Alex knew he was saying too much, being too bold, but he couldn't help it, more affected by their love than he'd known. "I would like very much to kiss you, Jade. May I kiss you, just one kiss?" There was that shyness again, peeking out at him from sparkling hazel depths. "Yes." Alex walked back over, and felt the ecstasy of the master's touch, the arms around him, the scent of him, and with a smile, his face was tilted up and the master's lips were coming down on his own, a kiss of thankfulness, of peace, of beginning love. When it ended, Alex didn't hesitate, but turned his face up for Sable's kiss, as well. The master laughed, a rich sound, richer than ever, and Sable nearly crushed Alex in his hug. "Thank you. I owe you more than you will ever know or I can ever repay." "You owe me nothing. It was you, the both of you that have given me everything. I but hand it back." With a final smile, Alex left, heart a little bit broken, but with his soul singing. Chapter Seven – Special Chapter Notes: Thanks to the usual cast of characters, plus one. Bri, you're one seriously cool man. Thank you for inspiring this wonderful original character, and giving me the green light to use him as I will. I hope you find yourself pleased. [g] The next morning, Alex was awakened by a soft paw batting gently at his cheek. He opened his eyes, and found Danally looking at him intently. "Goddess?" Those brilliant eyes looked at him searchingly, then a paw was laid on his chest, just above his heartbeat. "No, I do not think myself heartbroken. In truth, the thought that they will be together brings me a deep pleasure. It does hurt, some. I was only starting to know what it was like, to want another. I will miss Sable's attentions, his touch. And...and I confess, Goddess, that part of me wonders what would have happened, had the master not joined us last even. I think I might be somewhat different this morning." Danally made a negative sound, and when Alex looked up at her again, she tapped his forehead, then his heart again. "I know, Goddess. My head says one thing, my heart another, and my body is silent with confusion. Last night would have been too soon. But Goddess, I want that. I'm terrified, but I want it, as well. Is it wrong of me, to wish for that? Do I ask too much?" She bumped his forehead with her own, and rubbed for a moment. Then she moved to the table, reaching up and tapping the window above. "Outside?" She made a positive sound, and Alex sat up, trying hard to understand what she was saying. Nimbly, she leapt down, tapped his heart, then jumped back to the table and again tapped the window. "Are you saying I need to open my heart to the outside? To someone outside?" She made another positive "mayrow," and Alex frowned. "Should I seek companionship with another? Is that what you're telling me, Goddess?" She leapt down, sitting in front of him, affirming this with her eyes. "But I love Sable, or believe I do, and the master as well. Would it be right, for me to seek another, when my heart lies elsewhere?" She raised herself and gently batted his mouth. "I must tell them. Goddess, forgive me, but I have just awakened, and may be confused. You wish me to seek out another, tell them that my heart is already given, and then share companionship with them?" Danally gave a vigorous nod and another "mayrow," and bumped Alex's hand with her head, inviting him to stroke her. He did so, lost in thought, and then spoke quietly. "You mean for me to do this, to ready my heart, do you not? Your intention is not to make it harder for me to have Sable, but to make it easier for me to have him, and the master as well. You wish to see me know what it is I seek, and be sure of my heart before I give it a final time. Is that right, Goddess?" She turned, and did something she had never done before. Rising up on her hind legs, she braced herself, front paws on Alex's shoulders, and then her tongue darted out, dabbing briefly on his forehead. Then she was gone, out of his room. Alex smiled, warmed by her pleasure in him, and then stood to begin his day. Thoughtfully, as he bathed and dressed, he considered what he must do. It was only when he was downstairs, and finding his place at the table, that he realized he had no idea what to say to people when they asked him about his day with Sable. He couldn't tell them what had happened later, and Alex wasn't sure how public they were going to make the change. He was thinking on this, when the matter was taken out of his hands. The master entered, followed by Sable. Both men looked happier than Alex had ever seen them. And at peace. The horrible strain that had always been a small, but visible part of both men, was gone now, and though they seemed tired, there was a glow to them that was immediately noticed. It grew quiet as they walked in, and their hands became visible. They were holding hands. Stopping in the middle of the space, Fox waited until everyone was seated and the last sounds had faded away. He was smiling, could not keep it from his face, and his eyes seemed to glow a rich gold. The master looked like what he was, a man in love, and finally unashamed. "I would like to make an announcement, though I cannot think how to say this. For a long time now, Sable and I have cared for one another. You all know this, it is no secret, and many of you know, in part, the reasons why we have not acted upon that...care. Now, however, some of those reasons have been rendered invalid, enough that...well, we..." Alex watched, utterly fascinated, as the master searched for the right words, and failed. He looked at Sable, who shrugged helplessly, and then Fox laughed. It was a bright, beautiful sound, and it filled the space around them, even as Fox pulled Sable close and kissed him fully on the mouth, showing what he could not say. It was not a long kiss, and the master was mindful of the children, but the love and desire were easy enough to see, for the grown-ups. The tables had erupted in cheers and applause, and more than one person was misty-eyed when the kiss ended and Fox turned back. He was blushing, as was Sable, but they radiated happiness. "Thank you. All of you. It will not be easy, always, and in others, it changes nothing." A faint darkening flickered across the master's face, but was gone just as quickly as it had come. "I need not tell you that it is a risk, you know this, and the reasons why we ask for your confidence in this matter. And, rest assured, we shall attempt to be discreet, though after so many years, discretion is likely to elude us for a while." Gentle laughter greeted this realistic announcement, and Sable squeezed the hand he was again holding. "If anyone has any concerns or questions, I shall be in my study this afternoon, you may seek audience then. And now, it is time for the moment of silence." Alex bowed his head, sending his most sincere thanks to Danally, and asking guidance as he searched for a way to obey her. When he opened his eyes, he found that Sable and Fox had taken their usual seats, and were taking breakfast as normal. With the exception that they were sitting close together, and when a tiny bit of jam dripped onto the master's chin, it was Sable that used his thumb to clean it off, only to have that thumb kissed by Fox. A sigh to his right told him Marita had seen it, too, and he saw that she was looking somewhat dreamily at them. Catching his eyes, she blushed, and returned to her food. Moments later, Thomas was taking the empty space to his left. "Jade?" The gaze was warm, full of concern, and Thomas' hand was gentle on his shoulder. "If you need to talk, my friend, I am here." The words were said softly, meant for Alex's ears alone, and suddenly, Alex realized what was being asked and offered. Smiling at the boy, Alex put his own hand atop the one on his shoulder. "I'm fine, Thomas. They haven't hurt me, my word on it. It was my choice to pull back, for a while, to give them time alone. And, well, now Danally tells me I must seek another before I can return to them. My feelings haven't changed, Thomas, neither has Sable's, he's done me no wrong. But he needs this time, they need it, alone. Thank you, but all is well." Thomas took a minute to look deeply into Alex's eyes, then relaxed, smiling. "I understand, and it's right, the wisdom is sound. Still, should you need me, I am here." "You're a good friend, Thomas. I've turned to you before, I shall do so again, do I have need." Satisfied, Thomas started to leave, then turned back, mischief on his face. "Does that mean I may flirt with you and have it mean something?" Alex laughed, knowing Thomas was only teasing, and reached out, taking a hand in his and kissing the back of it. "No!" Thomas winked, and left. Alex turned back to find the eyes of Sable and Fox on him. He could see the touch of unease still there, concern for him, and it brought a rush of warmth. Giving them his brightest smile, he raised his mug to them, in tribute, letting them see again, that he was not hurt, and only wished them the best. They returned his toast, and the smile, and Alex gave his attention over to his breakfast, before joining Marita in the kitchens. As they worked, they talked, and the morning passed smoothly enough. Just before noon, Leona called to him. "Jade, I need you to take this to the Captain for me, please." She indicated a large basket on the floor, heaped high. "She's having guests for noon meal, but they're going to be eating there, as their business requires privacy. It's quite heavy, you might want to ride it up." "Yes, Leona." "Take the food in, take it out of the baskets and set the table for the Captain." Marita had just finished teaching him how to do that the week before, and now Alex was glad he'd asked. "Make sure she needs nothing else, then tell her you'll be back to pick up this afternoon. Repeat, please." Alex dutifully repeated his instructions, and picked up the basket. Leona paused him, made sure no one was looking, and slipped a cookie into his mouth with a wink. He smiled around it, and headed for the stables. He was still chewing when he approached the door. Looking in, he saw Sable standing by the master's side, the two men going over some papers. Alex had seen them do so a hundred times, but this time, when Sable moved to take the papers, Fox moved them aside. He held them an arm's length behind him, grinning at Sable's surprise. The stabler looked confused for a moment, then remembered he was now free to tease. Reaching out, he tickled the ribs on that side, and when Fox drew his arm back sharply, plucked the papers with ease. The master laughed, and kissed Sable briefly on the mouth. Turning to leave, he caught sight of Alex standing in the doorway. "I'm sorry, Jade, I didn't hear you." "That's because I did not knock, Master. It's so right, seeing you together, I wanted to watch a moment. I'm sorry." Fox looked at Sable for a moment, their eyes speaking, and then turned back to Alex, each man holding out an arm. In a flash, Alex set down the basket and moved into the embrace. It was wonderful, feeling himself surrounded by their strength, their affection, and he sighed happily, daring to snuggle close. "I take it I am forgiven for eavesdropping?" "This time." Fox's voice was soft, and it was said with a pat to his rear that let Alex know they didn't mind at all. "Thank you, Master, Sable. I meant it, looking at the two of you together, I've never seen anything more right. Your love is a wondrous thing. I feel blessed by its presence." "As do we. And again, Jade, we would thank you. You cannot know what you have given us. We will always be grateful to you, little one. And we want to remind you that you have a place here, with us." This was Lord Fox, and his eyes showed that he was completely sincere. Alex pulled back. This was as good a time as any. "I know. And I thank you, but not yet. I cannot. Now more than ever, I cannot. The goddess says I must seek companionship with another first. She says I must open my heart to someone from outside, before I may try to be with you." "And how do you feel about this, Jade?" Both men looked concerned, and Alex shook his head. "I'm not certain. I-I know it sounds right, and Thomas says it's only wise, but I'm frightened. I don't want to be hurt. Sable would not hurt me, nor you, Master. I have no promise from another." "Maybe that's why Danally ordered it. So that you understand, really understand, before you come to us. It's a part of growing up, Jade, a part you missed. You're no child, but you are innocent, in so many ways. You may get hurt, Jade, you're right, but taking that chance is something you should know," Sable said gently, eyes kind. "Sable's right, Jade. And so is Danally. But, you aren't alone. You may talk to us, to Fitz, to Thomas, to any of your friends. If you have doubts or questions, do not hesitate to bring them to us. Is that understood, Jade?" "Yes, Master." "No, Jade, I was speaking as your friend. We're alone, sweet." "Yes, Moss. Thank you, both of you." He impulsively reached out, hugging tightly again, and kissed each man on the cheek, before stepping back deliberately, and picking up the basket. "I'm to take this to the Captain. It's heavy and Leona suggested I ride it up. May I use Jessopa?" "Of course." With Sable's permission, Alex gave a small bow, and headed for the stall. When he'd ridden out, Fox turned to Sable. "What do you think she meant, 'from outside'?" "Don't ask me, Master, she's your cat." Sable managed to keep from laughing at the indignant expression on his new lover's face, for a whole three seconds. Alex rode quickly but carefully out of the keep, toward the hill where the Captain's hut was. They called it a hut, but it was a full cottage, with a large round room in the front, and a rectangle room in the back, smaller rooms where she did her actual living. The front room was for business. She had a round table in the center, and a low oval table in front of the fireplace. Alex had seen that much from the doorway, but he'd never actually been inside her hut before. There were easily a half-dozen horses tied to the railings by her shed, no doubt the reason the basket was so heavy. Now, as he dismounted, he saw her in the doorway, smiling at him. "Well met, Jade. And the food even more so." "Well met, Captain. Leona says..." Alex repeated his orders, and the Captain nodded, then opened the door wider. "Come in, please. We'll eat in the back, you can set up there." "Yes, Ma'am." Alex followed her inside, lowering his eyes and head as he walked through the main room. He could feel the men around the table watching him as he passed through, and couldn't help a spike of nerves. Taking a deep breath, he focused on following the Captain into a large sitting room. There was a table in the center, and she directed him to set this, while she began pulling chairs around. The men came inside as Alex was setting up, and his nerves grew steadily worse. There was a faint tremble to his hands, and he dropped a utensil. Picking it up quickly, he put it back in the basket, knowing Leona would have sent extra. "Relax, little one. There's none of us that bite, when we are not in battle or the bedroom." It was spoken lightly, but with genuine warmth, and Alex hunched his shoulders a little at having his clumsiness pointed out. "I'm sorry, Sir." A murmured sound of regret, and then that voice was addressing the Captain. "Captain, it seems that my attempt to soothe has gone astray, and instead made matters worse. Perhaps if you made introductions?" "Of course." She came forward, seeing now how scared the young slave was. "My apologies, Jade, I did not think. Here, look up. It's alright, you have permission to meet their eyes. You know you can trust me, Jade." "Yes, Ma'am." Alex did know. He was the master's property, she was sworn to keep him safe, and there were no lies at Samstar Fields. If she said he had permission, then he had it. Taking a deep breath, Alex forced his head up, looking first at the Captain. She gave him an encouraging look, pride in her eyes, and he straightened his posture again. "Good lad. Now, let me introduce you. These gentlemen all work for the master. Lord Fox owns many keeps, and these men have the charge of them, in his absence. He trusts them to watch his people, Jade. What does that tell you, little one?" "That I may trust them, as well. That they are good men, fair and kind of heart." "Very good. The Master will be pleased." She then introduced each man. Alex began to breathe more normally as he saw the same spark of care in each face as he had in the master's that first night. When she got to the last man, there was bit of extra depth in her voice. "And last, but by no means least, may I present Seneschal Alonzo de Singni, of Bluewoods Keep." This was the man that had tried to comfort Alex earlier, and now, as he dutifully met the man's eyes, he felt the last of the tension leave, replaced by a faint tingle. "Well met, Jade. A pleasure." The voice was low, deep yet clear. The hair, a shoulder's length of waving black, grey and white, parted in the middle and was secured at each temple. The features were a touch sharp, the nose as long as the master's, but narrow, the cheekbones high. A forehead that was broad, lips that were a bit thin, but well-shaped between the black moustache and beard and quirking constantly, as though ready to smile. It was an ordinary face, if pleasing, but the eyes captured Alex immediately. They were brown, but not a dark woodsy brown like Sable's. These eyes were nearly coal, and they sparked red, not gold in the light. They were alive with thought, with humor, and sharp as any eagle's. That was what the man reminded Alex of, a bird of prey, intelligent and noble, yet without the coldness associated with those things. This man was warm, everything about him implied heat and fire, and the contrast of cool intellect and hot passion made Alex's mouth dry. His heart was beating like a hammer, and his breathing had gone short again. "Seneschal de Singni, I'm honored to meet you." The words were spoken in a near whisper, as Alex found himself lost in those eyes again. The man seemed to sense this, and with a final quirk of his mouth, directed his gaze to the table. "I've missed Leona's cooking. My cook is a wonderful man, but no one can measure up to Leona. Tell me, does she still make the honey sheets?" The honey sheets were thin layers of dough with raisins, spice and honey between each layer. It was a rare treat, and Alex's favorite. "Yes, Sir." "Next time I visit, I'll have to write ahead. Think you, if I plead prettily, she'd have pity on a former helper and make it?" "You know that once you've been Leona's, you're always Leona's. She would have made it this time, Alonzo, had she known you were coming." The Captain placed a familiar hand on his arm. Alex was stunned. This man once worked with Leona? And he was a seneschal? He had worked the kitchens? Alex picked up the basket, not so lost in thought that he forgot his duties. "Ma'am, I'll return this afternoon. Is there anything else you need?" "No, Jade, we're fine. You did well, thank you." Alex made a deep bow, murmuring his thanks, and then left, feeling the near black eyes on him all the way out. Once on Jessopa, Alex turned to look back, thoughtfully. He realized he could see in the window of the sitting room. The man was sitting in a chair, staring out at him, the gaze hungry and yet, unthreatening. Alex blushed, and quickly headed back. He handed Jessopa over to the stable boy. It was expected, as he needed to get back to work himself, and he hurried into the kitchen after quickly washing. They'd just set the last of the food out, and now Leona took the basket from him, and handed him the iron bar they used to ring for meals. Alex stepped outside, grateful for the cool fall air, and rang the bell heartily. The sound helped clear his mind, and by the time he'd taken his place at the table, he was no longer nervous, merely curious. After meal, Alex helped clear away and washed the heavy pans, then headed upstairs for his lesson. It went well, they had begun some simple arithmetic, as well as learning more formal writing. Alex had his practice ink and vellum, and was beginning to do well with the quill. "Very nice, Jade. Only a few blotches, and those on loops, so it's to be understood. You've been practicing." "Yes, Master, thank you." "I think you're ready to drop this portion of the lessons, and just go on with your numbers. That will free you some time. And, as usual, I have a plan for that time." It was common knowledge that the master had to be doing something every minute nearly, and that he sometimes tried to make sure others were the same. "You ride well, Jade, those lessons are nearly ended, too. And now, with your consent, I have a proposal for you. I know Sable spoke to you of extra lessons, and of defense." "Yes, Master." "I should like you to begin taking training with the Captain." The idea sent a stab of fear through Alex's heart, but he said nothing, merely listened. "Jade, I know you fear women, with good cause, and I do not order this. But I would not see you vulnerable. She could show you how to protect yourself. You know how to survive, Jade, else you would not be here now. But she can show you better ways, faster and easier, so that you may defend yourself with more surety. Yes, you are safe, here and now, but none of us knows what the morrow brings, and should the worst happen, I would keep you alive, Jade. And, in truth, I am glad that it will be a woman teaching you. Just as you had to prove your strength against Marita, so will this help heal those fears. Think, Jade, what would it mean to you, did you know enough to ensure no woman ever hurt you again? To be confident that you could be safe from that, because you'd been taught by a woman what to do, how and where to strike. And by practicing against the Captain, you would soon enough stop seeing a woman, but an opponent only. The fear would fade, little one." The master had come around the desk and was now sitting on the edge of it, looking down at the young man so obviously thinking. Danally entered then, and Fox waited to see what would happen. She jumped onto the chair next to Alex, and looked at him patiently. "We spoke of this, Goddess. I did want to overcome my fears, I just didn't imagine doing it with a sword in my hand. Still, I want to be able to protect the keep." Fox smiled at this, knowing the boy said it without thinking. "Is it your will, too?" Danally continued to look at him, giving no clue that Fox could see. "I know, Goddess, this one is my choice." She continued to wait, still as stone, until finally the green eyes raised again. "Master, I should be grateful for the chance to study with the Captain." "You are so brave, little Jade. So very brave." Fox was looking at him with pride, and Alex responded with a wry shake of his head. "No, Master. I'm terrified, and I want to beg you to tell her how scared I'll be. If we fight, she'll strike at me, and I believe with all my heart that I'll likely soil myself the first time she does. I'll fail, miserably, for a long time, and I'm afraid I'll be a disappointment to you and a waste of her time." Fox moved to the door, shut and bolted it, and then came back, kneeling in front of Alex. He pulled the trembling form into his arms, holding him closely in a movement that was pure comfort. "Shhh, easy, little one, easy. Don't you see, Jade? That's what makes you brave. You have all this in your heart, and yet you take the chance anyway. That's true bravery, sweetling." Alex clung, letting the words lodge deep within him, before easing back. "Thank you, Master." "You're welcome. The Captain is busy for the next week, but after that, you will go to her after our lesson in the afternoon." "Yes, Master." "And I will have a long talk with her, with your consent, and explain your situation. She won't think less of you, Jade, and she'll be patient, my word." "I know, Master. Again, it's not her that I'm so frightened of. It's..." Alex hesitated, but decided it was time for some honesty. "It's the mistress at my former keep. She was very cruel, you know this. But she wasn't my owner. She was his whore, he used her to gain information and power. I was his, but he gave her nearly free rein with me. Her name was..." When Alex faltered, terrified of revealing so much, Danally quickly moved. Standing up, she put her front paws over his mouth, leaving them there. "I don't think she wants you to tell me, not yet." Fox, slightly concerned that he was beginning to see more in her actions than fancy, couldn't deny that he felt it, too. She looked over her shoulder briefly, and made a soft sound of confirmation. Slowly, she dropped back down. "You wish me to wait, Goddess?" A nod, a "mayrow," and Alex relaxed. "As you will. Forgive me, Master, but you're right, she doesn't want me to tell you yet. I don't think I could have anyway. I was too frightened." "There's nothing to forgive, Jade. You shouldn't force it. I'm moved that you thought to share with me. One day, I know I shall hear the whole tale." "Yes, Master." Alex rubbed a hand briefly across his forehead. All the emotional shocks of the last two days were taking a toll. "Head hurt?" "Only a little, Master." "Well, you take that little headache to Fitz, then lie down for a while. I'll send word to Sable." "Or take it yourself?" It was a tease, and Alex was shocked to realize he'd said it aloud. He looked up, but Fox was only chuckling. "Yes, or take it myself. Brat. If you weren't already in pain, I'd beat you for insolence." "Yes, Master. You're merciful, as always." Alex grinned, and Fox shook his head, with mock sternness. "Out. Now." "Yes, Master." Alex stood, heading for the door, only to be stopped, and given another hug. "Thank you, Moss. I'll be fine with the Captain." "I know." Fox kissed the forehead, then turned Alex and sent him off with a gentle swat. Fitz prescribed a powder that worked wonders, and Alex stretched out on his pallet. In minutes, he was asleep. When he woke up, he saw that it was still afternoon, and that his headache was gone completely. After washing his face and combing his hair, Alex went downstairs to the kitchens. "I'm on my way to the stables, Leona. I'll fetch the basket now, if that's okay." "That's fine, Jade, it's a good time." He went to the stables, again using Jessopa. He rode slowly, and was surprised to see that there were only a couple of horses left. One was a medium sized bay, the other a huge black stallion that whickered at Jessopa appreciatively. When Alex tied her to the rail, the big male was instantly next to Jessopa, and the little mare turned soft while Alex watched. Grinning, he knocked on the door. The Captain opened it, and bade him enter. "I'm afraid we got right back to business, Jade, everything is still on the table." "Yes, Ma'am." As he went through the large round room again, he saw that there were only two men left, an older gentleman that ran Piper's Fields, and Seneschal de Singni. Feeling his pulse pound at the sight of the man again, Alex made a polite bow, and hurried to the sitting room. He was packing up, when he dropped a spoon. Before he could pick it up, a dusky hand was offering it up. "Thank you, Sir. That's very kind of you." "Nonsense, it gave me an excuse to stand closer to you." Alex raised his eyes, unsure how this was meant. The man was looking at him with frank admiration, and yet, Alex didn't feel threatened. There was a harmlessness in the dark depths. The eyes promised pleasure, given a chance, but no pressure to give that chance. Risking much, Alex offered a small smile, feeling himself blush as he did so. Turning back to the task at hand, Alex reached for a plate. The next one was held out to him, and he took it without comment. When they'd packed nearly the entire basket, they reached for a dish at the same time. Their fingers brushed, and Alex felt it again, that deep tingle, and the plate slipped from his fingers. Fortunately, it landed safely on the table, and the man beside him picked it up again, putting it in the basket for him. "Tell me, Jade, are you a free man?" "No, Sir. I'm a slave, I belong to Lord Fox." "I see. Then I will bid you good day, Jade, and hope to see again." "It has been a pleasure, Sir." Alex meant it, though he wasn't sure how, or in what way. The mouth curved fully that time, and the eyelids lowered slightly. The voice was a full tease, as the other man said, "Well, that's encouraging." With a wink, he left the room, and Alex picked up the basket, carrying it out in a near daze. When he got back to the stables, Alex turned Jessopa over to Gibson, signing a thank you absently, and then carried the basket into the kitchen. He unpacked it, filling a sink with hot water from the hearth and setting the dishes to soak. Leona came by, and noticed his distraction. "Jade? Are you well?" "Yes, Ma'am. Leona? M-may I ask you something?" "Of course. And I will answer if I may." "One of the men meeting with the Captain... H-he knows you, asked if you still made the honey sheets. The Captain says he used to work here in the kitchens. His name is Seneschal Alonzo de Singni." Her face had shown recognition of the name, and she was smiling fondly, a good sign. "Yes. He used to work here with me. He was a most passable cook. " This was high praise from Leona, and Alex was even more intrigued. "And now, he is a seneschal?" "He worked hard, bought his freedom price, and made himself a future." She saw that this was not nearly enough to satisfy the curious green eyes. "Jade, little one, I'm sorry, but it isn't my story to tell. Now, do you ask me my opinion of him..." She trailed off, and Alex followed her easily enough. "Please, Leona? Tell me about him." "You wash those dishes, and I'll have time to share a few tidbits." Alex immediately rolled up his sleeves and got to work. Smiling, Leona took a much deserved break, sitting on one of the many tall kitchen stools, pulling it beside him. "He was known then as Proteus. He was a slave here before the Captain came, and so was already named. He was a quiet boy, a good boy, Jade, make no mistake. A hard worker and honest. But, there was a touch of mischief to him, as well. He and the master are nearly the same age, and it was only fear of the old master that kept the two of them as careful as they were. Alonzo was always inventing something. I'd come into the kitchen and he'd have a dozen bowls scattered about, pouring and mixing. Once in a while, Lord Fox would be with him, both of them trying to make something happen. Of course, usually all that happened was a mess, but they cleaned it up without being told." Leona paused and now she chuckled. "There was one time, I'm still not sure how it happened, but just as I walked into the kitchen, they poured something in a bowl, and the next thing I knew, there was a ball of purple flame whooshing up to the ceiling. It did no real harm, but it scared the life out of me. They were staring up at it, eyes as round as saucers, and then when it burst like a soap bubble, they cheered. I think the little scamps would have tried it again, if they hadn't seen me standing there." "We would have." The master's voice came from the outside door, and Leona laughed. "You should have seen it, Jade, it was a perfect ball, pale lavender, and nearly the size of the table. I've never seen anything like it." "Nor had I, and still haven't thankfully. They took twenty years off my life." "And you took two inches off our hides, so it was an even trade." Fox had moved to stand beside them, and now he winked at Alex as he said it, a playful pout looking very becoming on him. "I did no such thing. I put you across my knee and spanked you a half dozen times, no more. And as it was the only spanking I ever gave you, you've no cause to complain." "True." Fox grinned, reaching down to kiss Leona's cheek. "I'll leave you to work and return to my own. I'll be in my study until even meal and see you both then." "Yes, Master." Alex watched him go, entranced by the rare look into his master's younger days. It was easy to picture him, long legs and bony knees, but the eyes must have been much the same, even then. It was good to know there were happy memories for his master, as well as the bad. Finished with the dishes, Alex saw that Leona had been called away, and he left the kitchens, heading up to his room. He wasn't tired, not after his nap, but he wanted some time alone, to think. He visited the bathing chamber first, and had his bath, washing his hair well. He left wearing only his towel, acceptable since women weren't allowed in the men's quarter. In his room, Alex stretched out on the bed. He didn't bother to dress yet, was enjoying the faint chill of the room after the heat of the kitchen and bath. Soon he'd have to dress again, for even meal, but he wasn't needed in the kitchens. While Leona was on call all day and oversaw all the meals, that was her choice. The rest of them only worked two meals, to make the labor division fair. As his time was up, Alex was free for the evening, as the night work had begun in the stables as well, and he wouldn't be needed there, either. It was simply a matter of timing. The master had sent him to lie down for the afternoon, and he'd worked a bit later to make up for that, but he was now finished. Stretching, Alex let his mind drift, thinking of the day before. He remembered the trip, riding out with Sable, visiting the village. He thought of the lake, and how beautiful it had been, how nice to lie in Sable's arms and listen to the birds. That made him think of Sable kissing him. It was a pleasant thought, and Alex realized with a start that he was getting an erection. Biting his lip, Alex hesitated only a moment, before gingerly reaching down, and touching the hardening flesh. A trace of pleasure went through him, and Alex gasped. He'd never done this, touched himself for pleasure, it had been strictly forbidden. He'd tried, of course, but while he'd managed to make himself semi-hard, full erection had never happened, and there had been little or no sensation. Remembering that Fitz had told him that his old master had been giving him a drug, Alex wondered if the medicine had been the source of his impotence. Dismissing the thought as unimportant, but feeling hopeful, Alex tried a gentle stroke. He watched, fascinated as the smooth column of flesh filled completely, and that same pleasure returned. With a sense of wonder, and just a touch of embarrassment, Alex took hold of himself, and began a series of careful, slow strokes. His body shuddered, and Alex began to move a little faster, as the pleasure began to build. Curious, Alex used his free hand to rub lightly across one nipple, having noticed that they were stiffened, too. It was good, very good, and he rubbed the other nipple as well, before turning his attention back to his organ. The sensations were lifting him upward now, and without thought, his hips began to lift toward his loose fist. He thought of the master, seeing those eyes, and his body sang. Alex gave a soft cry as his seed spilled hotly over his fingers and onto his stomach. Alex lay there, breathless and boneless, completely overwhelmed with the experience. Was this what everyone felt? Was it always so powerful, the pleasure? Alex had never known anything that felt so good, not on a purely physical level, never had his body shown such a capacity for joy. Rising enough to reach for his cloth, Alex cleaned himself up. But not before he raised a cautious hand to his mouth. His tongue caught a tiny drop of the fluid, and he found it salty, a bit strong, but not unpleasant in its smokiness. Alex had pleasured many men, but only a few times had they trusted a slave with their sex in his mouth. Those times had been bad, choking and gagging on unwashed flesh, and the seed had been bitter, making him want to retch. Yet, he'd known other slaves that found pleasure in the act, both giving and receiving. Now, he thought he understood how it could be tolerable. As for receiving such attention, Alex couldn't imagine what that would feel like. He had the sudden image of Sable kneeling before him, cheeks hollowed as he drew on the organ. A faint echo of his earlier pleasure went through him, and Alex made himself get up, dressing quickly for the even meal. Soon, just as he'd tied his hair back again, the bell sounded. Alex hurriedly rinsed his bathing bucket and cloth out, returned them to his room, and made his way to the main hall. He took his usual seat, trading pleasantries with Drell and Marita. He was hungry, and looked forward to the meal. Fox and Sable entered together, though they weren't holding hands this time, and while Sable seated himself, the master remained standing, holding up a hand for silence. It was granted nearly immediately, and Fox smiled at the fast response. "Thank you. We are honored tonight to have a guest for even meal. He is an old friend, to me and to many of you. He is going to be visiting with us for a few days, as he has business with the Captain, and I know you will all make him welcome. He is staying on the upper floor, the chambers beside my own." This let everyone know the man was to be trusted, that he was safe. Alex, having already been told this once today, felt his face heat. He closed his eyes, as the master finished the introductions. "I would have you know Seneschal Alonzo de Singni, of Bluewoods Keep." Alex opened his eyes to see the man enter. He was dressed in a simple black shirt and pants, but there was a stitchery of red around the collar and down the front of the pants. It was a shock in the midst of so many browns and greens, for those were the colors most of the slaves favored, being the cheapest to make. The seneschal came to stand beside Fox, reaching out to shake his hand, bowing over it slightly. He then faced the tables, and bowed again. "Many of you know me, and it is good to see your faces again. Others do not, so I will tell you that once, this was my home, and your master was my master, for a time. And I will tell you in front of him, that this will always be my home, my heart will accept no other, not even my own keep. And I may address him now as Lord Fox, and take his hand as an equal, but he will always be the Master to me, and that is a very good thing. So please, no ceremony, no fuss. You need not hide the fact that you love him, for I love him still." The man said this with a smile, turning to his host. Fox shook his head, and reached out, hugging the man tightly, before sighing with annoyance. "You swore you wouldn't embarrass me." "I haven't, Lord Fox. I've thanked you, the way I never had the chance to do before." "You're a sneak." Fox pretended to glare, even as he motioned the man to his seat. "Yes, Lord Fox. But not a liar. There are no lies at Samstar Fields, Master, I haven't forgotten." The man looked overjoyed at Fox's flustered state, and took his seat willingly. When he was settled, Fox raised his eyes to the heavens. "And as I pray for patience, we will have the moment of silence. Begin." Alex, for once, didn't pray, instead used the time to get himself back under control. He couldn't think why he was nervous, but when he opened his eyes and found black eyes staring at him hotly from across the room, it began to make sense. And then that mouth curved and the eyes lowered, and Alex wondered if perhaps this was a good thing. The seneschal didn't look at him that way again, and Alex began to relax, enjoying the meal. He saw Thomas staring at their guest with undisguised interest, and chuckled. Somehow he didn't see his friend being startled by those piercing looks. If anything, Thomas was liable to become more determined. It was a most pleasant meal, and Alex watched as the seneschal took his plate over, scraping and washing with the others. The master didn't, but only because he was afraid he'd get caught that way by the wrong person. Sable always took his things, and did so tonight. The master left to do the nightly reading for the children, and Alex noticed a good many people gathering near the seneschal. It seemed he was not only remembered, but remembered well, and there was much hugging and hand clasping. When Leona came out of the kitchens, he swung her up in a hug, while she pounded his shoulder and demanded to be let down, but she was laughing, too. "He's a good man." Sable's voice startled Alex, and he realized that he'd been staring. "I know." "You've been staring at him." The voice was flat, and Alex turned, looking up at Sable with a slight frown. "Are you...jealous?" The big man grinned and reached out, tucking a strand of hair behind one of Alex's ears. "Not really. Maybe just a tiny bit, but only because I do love you, Jade. I've just never seen you look at anyone that way except the master or myself. It's different. But no, nothing bad, Jade. Only a genuine desire that you be happy." Alex, relieved, took a brief hug, then headed out of the main hall. Behind him, he was unaware that two pairs of brown eyes tracked his movements. Going back to his room, Alex sat down at the table, using his practice ink and vellum. He found the writing relaxing, he enjoyed making the precise movements, they seemed to calm him. Pausing only long enough to make a small fire, Alex returned to his work, concentrating on making the loops cleanly. It was harder because he was left handed, he knew this, but he was determined. Finally, when he'd done three clean ones in a row, he stopped. It was nearly time for the master to read, and he headed back down. Sure enough, the children were gone and the adults were beginning to gather. Alex had a glass of the wine, feeling indulgent with himself, and took a spot beside Earlic. The smith was deaf, yet seldom missed a reading. The master spoke clearly enough that Earlic caught nearly every word, and now he nodded a greeting to Alex. "Have you seen Thomas?" Alex shook his head, then grinned. "You could check with our guest." Alex knew Earlic had no problem with his son's many conquests, nor the fact that many of them were male. Now, watching the near-giant make the sign of the cross, Alex could only laugh. "I keep telling myself he leaves in the summer, but then I want to cry." This was said with no shame, and Alex patted the thick forearm across from him. "He'll be sorely missed, Earlic. He's a good friend." "Thank you, Jade." The words were slightly slurred, and Alex knew that Earlic was tired. It took concentration for the man to speak, and when fatigued, he lost some clarity. The shops had been working hard, as it was nearly time for the goods to be sold with the harvest. Samstar Fields bought and sold and traded the year round, but at harvest time, when there was more free coin, they did the bulk of their business. The master would be getting wagon loads together soon, and sending them to the city, while he himself made a required visit to the court. Thomas entered then, coming over to kiss his father on the cheek. Earlic took one look at Thomas and said, "He turned you down." Flushing, Thomas glared at his father, then grudgingly chuckled, nodding. "That's okay, Jade's back on the market." "But not to the general public." Earlic snorted at this set down to his son, and Thomas, drawing himself up to his full seventeen summers, stuck out his tongue. The master entered, and soon Alex forgot everything, left all of it behind, finding that place within himself where the words never failed to take him. When the reading ended, Alex sighed his pleasure, and stretched, reaching for a chess board. He was looking for Drell, hoping for a game, when an increasingly familiar voice came to him. "Is this game promised?" Turning, Alex saw the seneschal standing across from him ready to take a seat on the bench, but waiting. "No, Sir." "May I join you then?" Alex nodded, gesturing to the board with one hand. The seneschal took his seat, and Alex picked up a piece in each hand, hiding them behind his back, and then holding out the hands. Alonzo tapped the back of the left one, and that same spark went through Alex. He handed over the black pieces, and began to set up his whites. "I should warn you, Sir, I'm not very good. I was only taught a few months ago." "And I am out of practice, so we shall both do our best and see what happens, eh?" "Yes, Sir." "Jade, I know that normally you would be expected to stand on ceremony, but I am an exception to that rule. Yes, you must still be polite, but could you please call me Alonzo, not sir?" "I could try. Alonzo." The eyes flared briefly, and Alex swallowed hard, before reaching for his queen. "Nice." Alex looked up, but Alonzo was looking at the carving on the knight, and he relaxed again. "You know, Jade..." the rich voice seemed to caress the shell of Alex's ear, before entering. "The master taught me to play. We used to play many games when we were younger, but chess was one of my favorites." "He taught me as well. My second night here." "And Sable? Do you play with him, as well?" There was something about the way it was spoken that made Alex bite his lip, before saying in a quiet whisper, "I love him. I'm in love with him. But I don't play with anyone, Alonzo, not yet. Though," and now, heart pounding, he forced himself to stare deeply into those fathomless eyes, "I think I'm ready to start." The keep could have caught on fire, and Alex wouldn't have noticed, as Alonzo slowly lifted one of Alex's hands, and kissed the palm of it, before setting the hand down again. "I'll speak to Lord Fox. Until tomorrow, Jade." A bow, and the man strode out, leaving Alex staring after him. Moss, Sable and Jade continued... raven@aeneas.net

Title: Moss, Sable and Jade – Chapters Six & Seven Author: Raven Email: raven@aeneas.net Pairing: As far as pairings go, there will be Sk/K, Sk/M, K/O, K/M, K/M/Sk and maybe some other assorted variations. Rating: NC-17 Author's Notes: While vaguely medieval in nature and setting, this does not take place in any known time or place. It is full of anachronisms at every turn from material things and manners of speech to philosophies that simply were not present in the real Middle Ages. Also, while this is a slave fic and carries some dire warnings, there are very few graphic scenes in this fic. This is not a typical slave fic in that it is ultimately about goodness, healing, hope and love. There may be more dark scenes before the work is completed, but right now, you will find very little of that sort of thing here. It is not a dark piece, nor a harsh story, so don't let the category "slave fic" mislead you. There is nothing wrong with that kind of story at all, I'm simply warning you that this isn't one of them. Additional Author's Notes: This is a work-in-progress. Please be aware that I do not work on this story very often. It has taken over a year to get it to this point, it may take another year before it is complete. It is my pet project and I am writing it solely to please myself, therefore I only work on it when the mood, timing and setting are just right. That doesn't happen very often, I can promise. It's not a matter of inspiration or feedback, it's a question of loving a private world in my own head and playing there selectively, to keep it special. So, if you really, really, really need to know what happens next and just can't wait...please, do us both a favor and don't read it until it's done. [g] Warnings: Slave fic. Angst. References to non-consensual behaviors. Violence. References to Torture. Oh, yeah, and Angst. Summary: Alex is a slave, but his new home and master are unlike anything he's ever known. Disclaimer: The characters within these stories belong to Fox, 1013, et al. There is no profit made or intended from these stories, and they should be considered as being for entertainment purposes only. back to top

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