In the Summers' living room the Slayer sat with the Scooby gang who had gathered to offer Buffy their support at her resent loss. They sat quietly, just being there for their friend. Quietly remembering Joyce, just being together. It was into that still tablaeu that a quietly crying again Dawn entered. Concerned for her supposed to be sister's well being Buffy started to quiz her as to what was wrong with her.
"Dawn? Where have you been? What have you been doing? You didn't go near Spike again? After I told you to stay away from him! I told you he'd hurt you. What did he do? I'll kill him!" Buffy managed to say all the wrong things. She didn't even realise she had done so until her sister's face screwed up in rage and hate, ready for her reply.
"This is what I did! Let me share my evening with you, huh?" Dawn crossed to the television set and fiddled with a few wires, once the camcorder was wired in to the television she hit playback and showed them all what she had done,
Witnessing Spike's rape and suicide.
Angel's voice echoed in the otherwise soundless house with his hate filled statements that all his actions were from Buffy, at her request.
The slayer looked around frantically at her friends, begging, pleading to be believed.
"I didn't, I didn't say to do that. All I asked was that Angel speak to Spike, about his stupid obsession. That's all. I wanted Spike's obsession with me over and done with."
"Well, it sure looks like it's as over and done with as it can possibly be!" Anya snapped at the blonde slayer. "I'd say raped, beaten, dead is a pretty thorough talking to, wouldn't you? I hope you're pleased with your outcome." Having finished her short speech she headed for the door. "I think I'll be going now. And I suppose I'd better move before you send Angel over to speak to me too about all this!" She slammed the door after her. It was opened and closed soon after as Xander rushed to catch her up.
"Kinda makes me glad I'm over my crush on you. You're sure evil when riled." He opened the door and called out. "Anya, wait up, it's not safe out here alone!"
"And you think it's safe in there?" The occupants of the Summers residence heard her reply before the door slammed shut once more.
"Poor Spike, to die knowing the very person that you loved hated you so much they ordered that!" Tara stood, finally tearing her eyes from the now blank screen and turned to look at Willow, then Buffy.
"I didn't order... that!" Buffy pointed angrily at the screen. "I didn't."
"A..a..acording to the big guy you did! Are you saying Angel's a liar? Even if you're telling the truth S... Spike isn't gonna know that, is he? Being dead and all.." Tara reached for her coat and struggled through her rage and tears to put it on. "Spike saved my life, saved my love with Willow, saved me from my family and their sick perversions, and I never really thanked him for it... now I never can!" Fury finally escaped her control and she rounded on the slayer. "Sweet dreams Buffy, I hope you feel what he felt, know what he knew!" There was yet another flash of light, this time not on the television screen, and Tara stormed out the house too.
Dawn bent to retrieve her camcorder and the tape after rewinding it. She hit play by accident and Spike's happy, amused voice filled the room.
"The Pan Dimensional Princess and the Vampire, by Dawn Summers. There once was a lonely vampire..." She slammed the stop button, gathered her things and ran out the room, heading for the stairs and the fragile sanctuary that was her bedroom.
"I'd better go see to Tara, and see if I can get her to take back her wish...good night." Willow looked torn, having to choose between her lover and her best friend. Finally she headed for the door and Tara.
For his part Giles recalled the images they had seen and the ever close to the surface memories of Jenny and her pain filled death.
"Angelus?" He asked, not actually able to meet Buffy's eyes.
"I think so."
"You going after him?" Giles looked towards the ceiling and the grieving teenager upstairs. "Or staying here with Dawn?"
"I guess Dawn needs me, even if she doesn't know she does." Buffy managed a strained smile for her watcher and mentor.
"You want me to stay?"
"No, I think we'd better deal with this between us. I'll be all right, Dawn will be too, eventually. Thanks anyway." She walked Giles to the door and quietly let him out. Turning to the stairs she tried to think of some way she could comfort her sister, but couldn't even imagine what it had been like. To be trapped there, in Spike's crypt while he was brutalised like that. A tear slowly trickled down her face. "Oh God, Spike, I never meant that." She climbed the stairs to face whatever was up there for her.
***
Spike found himself awake and lying on a clean, comfortable bed. All around him was a purer, whiter light than he'd ever seen. Beside him sat Oz, the werewolf he'd helped the slayer rescue a few weeks back.
"You dead too then?" He asked Oz.
"Nope, neither are you. You're here, with The Powers That Were. Sorta like The Powers That Be, just older." Oz stood up and nodded to someone the other side of Spike. He got up to let a dark haired, possibly middle aged woman with gentle eyes sit on the chair. She smiled at Spike, her eyes touched with a flicker of profound sadness.
Spike couldn't take his own eyes from her if he tried.
"Child, you have so many tasks yet to perform, for us, in return for which we have healed your injuries. All of them except one." The mature woman leaned forwards to reach for him, touching his face with a delicacy of touch he had never known since a child with his own long dead mother. "I am Hera, Queen around here by the way, and have been... elected... to tell you that you are wearing what our missing children call the collar of Hera. Oh, that's demons, much like yourself and young Oz here by the way. You are both part of our missing children, and that collar is a... fertility device." She reached out and took Spike's hands in hers, not letting him break her hold. "It works despite the gender of the one wearing it. It was originally designed to allow new widows to have a child fathered by their husbands after they had fallen nobly in war. Do you see what it was meant for? It grants fertility. By the undead, before Hades' domain claimed them. And there is no easy way to tell you this little one, except honestly. You are pregnant, child, and we can't stop it with out killing you, taking you to your final death."
As the truth of her words sunk in Spike screamed, cried, pleaded with them to kill him. Through all his struggles and grief Hera stayed by his side, holding on to him. Grounding him.
Oz too stayed in Spike's line of sight, silently being with him. Grieving with and for him. Waiting for the storm to pass and the rest of Hera's story to be told.
***
First light brought Angel awake, back from Angelus' madness. It also brought full technocoloured, stereophonic memories with it. Every single thing he had done the previous night. He had to wait the entire day, wondering if he's be in time to save Spike from other imaginary demons harming him in his weakened state. Wondering what Buffy would say if Spike told her what he had done. He recalled in exacting detail each and every injury he had inflicted. He remembered the joy inflicting them had delivered to him, to his demon. He made silent plans to take his childe home and care for him, treat his injuries, beg his forgiveness, give him the sire blood he would need to heal. Be the sire he should have been, not what he was.
As soon as the sun set enough to grant him his freedom he hurried over to Spike's crypt, his hands shook as he pushed open the door only to come face to face with a tear stained Buffy. His childe's name died unspoken on his lips, another name replaced it with dread.
"Buffy?" He whispered, somewhat shocked to see her there. "How... how is Spike? I only realised what I had done when I woke up. I had no control, Angelus was lose.." He stopped speaking at the sight of the rage building in her face.
"My sister was here, she had been filming Spike reading a story she'd written for him. They were happy, friends, having quality time as they say. Then you arrived and she had to hide and you know what you did! You do know all of what you did, don't you?" She shot him a filthy look as he nodded slowly. "Well, I don't know if you'll be happy to hear this or not, to know that Spike suicided last night, right after you left. Dawn helped him get the stake and he killed himself! And she was still filming it, the camcorder was still running. We all saw it! All of it." She walked towards him, quaking in her unbridled rage. "How dare you ever say I asked you to perform such an unspeakably evil act! That I wanted you to perform such wanton acts of cruelty! Not on Spike, your blessed master, not any demon, person, anyone. Ever! You have exactly the same choice you gave Spike, get out of Sunnydale and never come back, or I stake you myself! You getting this, Angel, Angelus, whoever you claim to be tonight? Leave!" She screamed in his face as she drew her stake. All Angel could do was retreat and head for LA and home. Alone.
Alone except for his memories. The one fact pounding through his numbed mind. He'd killed his childe. Raped him, tortured him, drove him to suicide. Killed him as effectively as if he had staked the younger vampire himself.
How could things have gone so totally wrong? So quickly?
The only answer he had was Wolfram and Hart. Them and their interminable drive to release Angelus, now it was something far worse that they faced. It was a guilt ridden Angel. A purer, more focused guilt than he had ever experienced before. It had a face, a name, a specific crime. It was Spike, his beautiful, wild natured childe and Angel would exact his full revenge against all of them. Each and every damned lawyer that thrice damned firm had would pay for this. They had made it so easy for Angelus to win his freedom. All he had now was his guilt and revenge to comfort him. That and the destruction of Wolfram and Hart, to try to mend his broken heart with their blood. They had driven him to kill his childe, and he would make them pay!
***
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