“Sandburg, get in this office now!” Simon growled from his doorway, the ever present stoogie hanging from his fingers. Blair looked up in surprise. What did I do now? He sat gaping before Jim grunted in his direction. Blair nodded and hurried toward Simon’s office, grateful at least to get away from his desk and the mountains of paperwork they seemed to be besieged with of late.
He took a second to collect himself in the doorway before entering and quickly sitting down in front of the Captain. Simon seemed to glare at him through his glasses for a moment before grimacing and getting down to the point. “What’s up with Jim?”
Blair blinked. “I’m not in trouble? This is about Jim?”
“Have anything to feel guilty about Sandburg?” Simon’s voice was teasing and not angry.
Blair relaxed back into the chair and sighed with relief. “Nah man, it was just the way you called me in here I thought ““
Simon gave a dismissive wave with his cigar. “Nope, I want to know what’s up with my lead investigator. Something’s up with Jim and I figure it’s some woo-woo Sentinel stuff, so you tell me O Wise One what’s up with him?”
Small lines creased the Guide’s forehead. “What makes you think that something’s wrong with him? He’s acting the same way he usually does.”
Simon’s eyebrows shot upwards. “And you don’t think the way he’s acting is weird?”
Blair was taken aback and leaned forward a bit, “Weird how? He has this thing about color coding the Tupperware, but I don’t think that’s weird, more like seriously obsessive.”
“Oh come on Sandburg how have you not noticed?” Blair threw his hands up in the air in frustration and shook his head. “Really?” Simon asked again then leaned back. He took a couple of deep drags off the stogie making Blair frown.
“Hey, weren’t you supposed to be off those things?” Blair gestured to the cigar he so loathed but had to admit made Simon look pretty cool at the same time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Something about the way the kid looked at him, unnerved Simon a bit, making his reply come out harsher than usual. “I quit quitting and don’t change the subject. I’m concerned here Sandburg that you haven’t noticed how off Jim is. It’s kind of like he’s, well, I don’t know… given up? On the edge? Isn’t his Guide supposed to notice these kinds of things?”
“Oh.” Blair could see images of Jim flash before his eyes. There had been times where Jim had looked at him oddly, and not said anything even when it was obvious he had something to say only moments before. But when Blair called him on it, Jim had grouched so he let it go since it didn’t seem all that important. Only minutes ago, when Simon called him into the office Jim had snapped at him again. Now that he was thinking about it, Jim had been doing a lot of that lately. And other times he was the exact opposite. Closing his eyes, he tried to settle his thoughts. His mind settled on the image of Jim sitting on the window sill in the loft looking a million miles away. “You mean the daydreaming and super-grouch routine?”
Simon smiled for the first time since their meeting began. “Now wonder boy sees it! Okay, now what’s going on up there?” He tapped the side of his head meaningfully.
Blair shrugged. “I don’t know.” Blair was at a loss, his mind shutting down for some reason resisting looking at the problem. Yet his restlessness had to go somewhere and his libido took over taking advantage of his time alone with Simon to look him over. The man was a feast for the eyes no doubt about it.
Large brown eyes locked with Blair’s and he knew was totally and completely busted. His blue eyes widening with fear and he winced waiting for the Captain to explode in rage. Instead Simon stopped cold, chewed a bit on his cigar with brow furrowed in concentration.
Suddenly he sat forward in his seat and slapped his forehead. “Jim!”
He suddenly leaned forward and glared at Blair gesturing with his cigar. “You just checked me out didn’t you? Didn’t you? Damn it Sandburg!” He slammed one hand on the desk between them making Blair jump in his seat as his cheeks flamed with embarrassment. “Uh huh!” Simon nodded seeing the blush. “Was it the first time? Did you ever do that in front of Jim? Please tell me you haven’t!”
Blair recoiled back at the reaction he was getting and put up his hands. But at least Simon didn’t seem the least bit concerned that his orientation went both ways. “Hey man, I apologize alright? No, it wasn’t the first time but I’m sure that Jim would never have noticed.”
At this a look of doubt covered the Captains face. Blair’s voice trailed off as his eyes went wide, eventually he shook his head. “No way, man. Are you saying that Jim saw me check you out and that’s why he’s acting all weird?” Blair laughed, “Because he’s jealous? But Jim is like the poster boy for being straight!”
“He never told you, huh?” A slow, smug smile began to spread across Simon’s face as he sat back taking a deep drag. His satisfaction at having one up on the highly educated younger man was obvious and irritating to Blair whose mind was still reeling. “Trust me still waters run deep. There’s more to Jim than meets the eye and you of all people should know that.”
“Are we talking about the same Jim Ellison here?” Blair had many gay and bisexual friends, but somehow he never noticed that Jim’s interest ran both ways. He’d never seen Jim check any guy out and he’d only seen him date women, beautiful women. Blair scratched his head. Was it possible?
“Yes, and this means he’s soft on you Sandburg.” Simon suddenly paled, gulped and his brown eyes went wide. “And that means I’ve got a former Ranger out there who probably is looking for a chance at friendly fire. Oh, no, no, no! You need to go talk to him Sandburg and keep it the hell out of the building if you can. But I guess it won’t matter ‘cause everyone thinks you’re doing it anyway.”
“Everyone?” he squeaked.
“Yeah, even the mayor likes to make jokes about you two being the best to take a case to bed.” Simon snickered before he grew serious and took out his gun laying it on the desk. He jerked his chin toward the piece. “By the way, Jim is one of my best buddies. If you so much as ““
Blair cracked a grin, interrupting with, “-ever hurt him, yadda, yadda, blah, blah, blah.” He looked toward the door with an nervous smile and stood up. But fear suddenly overtook him and he couldn’t move. He simply stood there staring blankly at the door. His legs locked in panic.
Simon shook his head. “SANDBURG!” he barked loud enough for several heads to turn toward the office.
Snapping out of it quickly, Blair looked back at Simon with pure fear. “I can’t go out there.”
“You have to Sandburg. His stats are off and it’s already been suggested that he be given a new riding buddy. He’s a hazard on the streets like this. And besides I don’t want to worry about him blowing off my head when we go fishing the next time. You better make it clear to him that the Guide and Sentinel belong together and I’m just the good old, best boss and friend anyone should be lucky to have.” A large smile covered Simons face for a moment before it abruptly changed. Simon screwed up his face and barked out, “WHY ARE YOU JUST STANDING AROUND!? DON’T YOU HAVE WORK TO DO? GET THE HELL OUT OF MY OFFICE SANDBURG NOW!!!”
Blair practically leapt the rest of the distance between him and the door before yanking it open. Jim was looking at him with open curiosity as he jumped out of the office. Blair’s breath caught in his throat. Was it true? He hurried to sit down at his desk to try and act like everything was okay. But across the way, he could see Jim was burning to find out what had happened. Blair was touched that despite being able to Jim had respected his privacy and not listened in. Now it was time for the big question.
What the hell do I say to him?
By mid-afternoon thunder was shaking the precinct. Lightning flashed outside and suddenly they were plunged into darkness. Without power they were all sent home early, much to Blair’s dismay. Why was it when he wanted to get out of there, he couldn’t and when he wanted to stay forever, he had to go early? At least he’d brought his own car. But his old rusty bucket of a car was having a time making it through the deluge. “Stupid defrosters work already!” Blair shouted in frustration as he wiped the windshield off with a spare t-shirt. He had only a moment to scream in fear before he slammed into the moose that had wandered into town. Blair shot forward, hit the windshield then slumped unconscious onto the steering wheel. The blare of the horn was drowned out by the rain.
************************************************************************
Jim arrived home. “Sandburg, you here?” His hope that his partner had made it home safe and sound flew out the window. The dark loft seemed to close in around him and his fears. Something twisted in his gut telling him that Blair was in trouble. With a curse, he grabbed the truck keys and raced back out into the storm.
Thanking his Sentinel senses all the while, Jim drove though the pelting rain taking note of all the cars pulled over to wait it out. None were Blair. Jim’s fear rose in his throat. Bright lights drew his attention to a side road Blair favored. Out in the rain, his spirit animal appeared wet and angry it raced down the road. Jim put the police light on the truck and followed the cat.
Jim’s heart hit his ribs when he saw the crumpled state of Blair’s car. He reached out and could just make out the sound of Sandburg’s heart beat. Relief coursed through him at that and before he knew it he was running toward the wreck, slipping and sliding through mud and moose. EMT’s were checking him over in the back of an ambulance. “How is he?” Jim pulled out his police ID, and waved it at them both before putting it away in favor of putting a hand on Blair’s arm.
I’m here Blair.
“He’s still out cold, took a bounce to the head, but otherwise he’s okay. Thanks to the mud they both skidded quite a bit, so the hit wasn’t as bad as it could have been if the roads had been dry.”
Jim let go of a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. Just then Blair’s eyes fluttered open then shut. “Ow!” His hand shot up to the side of his head.
“Here Mr. Sandburg, I have two aspirin here with your name on it.” They helped him sit up and take some pills and water. It was a show of how much pain Blair was in that they weren’t even treated to a speech on chemical and pharmaceutical companies, instead Blair woofed them down.
“That will take a week to wash out.”
“Sir?” The EMT asked.
Jim smiled. “That’s my Blair.”
Blair looked up into Jim’s eyes and held them for a moment. Jim’s breath caught in his throat at the seriousness in the deep blue orbs. “So when can I go home, man?” Jim blinked; it had almost seemed for a second there that Blair had something to say but had stopped. And he had a feeling it was not about going home, either.
The younger EMT chuckled. “If you sign a few forms you can go. But I think the car will need a tow.”
“After this monsoon lets up,” the other one commented. “I just want to go home and dry off.”
Jim looked down at himself realizing for the first time he was totally soaked. His shirt clung to his body but he really didn’t care. He just wanted to make sure for himself that Blair was okay. After about 20 minutes Blair was released and a tow truck had come for the car. Jim had to call in a few favors to get the tow too, since there were accidents all over town thanks to the weather and subsequent power outages. Blair was a bit out of it, cradling one side of his head, so Jim kept quiet on the ride. They made it home with only two detours for downed trees. The loft had never looked more welcome then when the two sodden men walked into it at last. Jim got to work lighting candles as Blair stood with one arm propping himself up against a wall, making a puddle on the floor.
“Why don’t you get out of those clothes and I’ll make us both something hot.” Jim offered over his shoulder, already peeling off his shirt and heading upstairs at a jog.
Blair’s head was still ringing a bit, but he wasn’t so out of it he missed the floor show. Jim Ellison wet was incredible. Hard wet muscle seemed chiseled by the shadows cast by the many candles that were lit. Blair’s mouth went dry. “Yeah that sounds great.”
I sound like an idiot!
Sighing, Blair went to his room to dry off and change.
Blair sat on his bed, holding his head in his hands. His head still hurt, but it was hard to tell how much of it was from the accident and how much was stress. Some of the stress was from dealing with the car and some was from Jim. Well, not exactly from him, but because of him.
Never before had Blair had such an attack of confidence. Coming onto women was easy, but with guys there was always that hidden danger of getting decked. And if Simon was wrong he was definitely going to be making that trip to the hospital after all. But his head definitely hurt too much to deal with it right now.
Tossing his sopping wet clothes into the corner clothes basket, Blair looked around the room in a daze that he couldn’t completely contribute to getting his eggs scrambled earlier. What a mess he was in. Jim’s friendship was the best thing he had going in his life “ ever. And everything that was worthwhile in his world revolved around Jim. What if Simon was wrong?
But what if he was right? Memories of smiling, laughing and great times with Jim flooded his mind. The finale was the most recent, Jim, wet and glistening in the candle light with his shirt off. “Why me?”
Jim was standing in the doorway with a fresh white tight t-shirt and jeans on, steaming mugs in each hand. “I don’t think the moose was aiming for you, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
Blair’s heart clenched at the thought of the moose and its remains. He’d been in such a daze he’d forgotten all about it. A flash of the accident swam past his mind, and his stomach suddenly surged to his throat. He jumped up and ran past Jim with a hand over his mouth. Sounds of Blair’s retching soon filled the loft.
When he came out, embarrassment was written all over his face. “Sorry.”
“You okay?” Jim asked, handing Blair a wet towel.
“I think I’m going to take this as a sign and go to bed. Goodnight Jim.”
Jim watched Blair go to bed wondering if Blair was really okay or not. He decided to keep his hearing attuned to the younger man through the night. Picking up the largest candle Jim left it in the sink so Blair could have some light if he needed it, then headed to bed wondering if he’d upset Blair somehow. It plagued him all night.
“Where’s Sandburg?” Simon stood at the side of Jim’s desk with his hands on his hips, scowling at him over an unlit cigar.
“Not here Captain, he was in a car accident last night, hit a moose in that weather if you can believe it.”
“Damn kid will do anything to get out of it.” Simon mumbled, but Jim’s hearing caught it.
“Get out of what sir? Are you saying Blair did that on purpose? I saw the car ““ Jim had risen to his feet in Blair’s defense.
Simon had put a hand out to stop the Sentinel’s forward momentum. It did the trick. “Woah, there Jim, of course he didn’t. It’s just “ ah, never mind. When he does manage to make it in, tell him to see me.” Jim nodded with a frown. Using the excuse of a lunch break, Jim took the time to drive over to the loft to get some answers and check on Blair.
When he arrived it was to find a letter on the table and Blair napping on the couch. He opened it and began to read:
Hey Jim,
Simon noticed that you’ve been acting off. I feel bad that I didn’t see it at first. Maybe that’s because I’ve been too busy. I wanted to talk to you last night, but it seemed the world was against it. And I wouldn’t be Naomi’s son if I didn’t listen to my gut right? But hopefully today the stars or whatever will agree that today will be an okay time to talk. So if you come home for lunch, wake me up.
Jim crumpled the note in his hand. Simon had noticed? Noticed what exactly? He walked over to the couch and gave Blair’s shoulder a shake. “Hey Chief, you wanted me to wake you?” He sat down on a free spot while Blair scrunched up at one end, wrapping his arms around his knees.
“Uh, so how was work?”
“Fine, although Simon seemed to think you were getting out of something. Care to tell me what that’s all about Sandburg?”
Blair looked away for a moment then stared right into Jim’s eyes. “How do you feel about me?”
Jim frowned. “What?’
“Answer the question Jim.”
Shaking his head at the waste of time, Jim shot to his feet looking at his watch. “I better get back to the office.”
Blair stood up suddenly only to pitch backwards as he tried to find his balance. Jim caught him around the waist and pulled him up. Their bodies were touching from chest to ankle and Jim looked down into eyes bluer than he ever remembered them to be. Blair slowly slid his hands up Jim’s arms to his shoulders, never losing eye contact. “Tell me.”
Each time Jim tried to move his head away; Blair caught it with hand and turned it back until their eyes met again. “Please Jim.”
Jim’s breath was heavy in his lungs. Blair’s blue eyes seemed to have pinned him. “You should still be lying down.”
Blair smiled. “You’re more scared then me.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Jim tried once more to get away, only to be turned back. He huffed in annoyance.
“Then shut me up,” Blair whispered pulling on the nape of Jim’s neck until they were only a breath away from each other. “I dare you.”
Jim moved forward, tilting his head and somewhere in the kiss that followed Blair thought he heard the howling of the wolf within and the roar of a jungle cat. There was a connection deepening between them, even as clothes began to fly in all directions. Even as they clawed at each other in both dominance and submission, they grew together as one. Much later, sweaty and satisfied Jim turned to Blair with a blinding smile. “SO what was that about Simon anyway?”
“Let’s just say sometimes even a Guide can get lost.”
“Sounds like a challenge Chief.”
Blair gave the Sentinel a once over. “You up to another round big guy?”
“Yeah,” Jim replied. “But this time, can we use the bed instead of the sofa?”
“You old romantic.”
“Emphasis on old Sandburg. Speaking of which, what are you doing with an old man like me? Are you really sure about this?” Blair covered his partner’s mouth with a finger and without another world led him upstairs in reply.
Mmm, Salty Beef by Keikokin [ - ]
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Test Reader: Allexandrya Story Title: Brock
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