Finally they were along, everyone had gone home, or at least gone as the case maybe. There was enough food left in the kitchen to feed an army, there was no way on earth they would be able to eat it all, and God how he hated to waste food. Vic and Debbie had outdone themselves, which for them was a grand achievement. And although all the attention was great, all the food had been wonderful it was more than nice to be alone here in his apartment with Michael. There was also something terrifying about it, something he couldn't explain. He was now truly part of Michael's extended family, all the odd tension seemed to be gone at least for now and that was refreshing. There wasn't this constant struggle to restrain himself, the aching knot in the pit of his stomach that came along with constantly trying to see this whole situation from their point of view, while getting very little of it back, was thankfully, and mercifully gone. And Michael had been great, he'd fought the dragons and faced the demons, and told the world in essence to fuck off he was Michael's man and nothing and no one was going to stop him from getting what he wanted. There was so much contained in such a small package, the enormity of who Michael is sometimes took his breath away. There were times like now that he sat back in awe of Michael.
But now as he watched Michael trying to put the remaining food in his refrigerator, Ben was also taken a back by his silence. There is was, the thing haunting Ben since they had left the hospital this morning. There was a silence surrounding Michael like a dark cloud ready to burst its seams and rain down on them. Michael moved about in this cloud almost oblivious to it at times, and at other times he seemed to gather it around him, as if somehow it were protecting him. Shielding him from something he knew that he would rather not know. /revelation/
"Michael." Ben said almost a whisper, he wasn't sure if Michael had heard him or not. And he wasn't exactly sure if he wanted him to or not. He just wanted to break the silence, to somehow bring Michael back into the world he inhabited.
Michael turned around his face almost glowing, his eyes soft and inviting, and his smile melted Ben's heart. Michael had a thousand and one smiles, a thousand and one ways of drawing him in with his eyes, he never had to knock, Ben was always invited, waited for, anticipated. Ben got up from where he was sitting and walked over to Michael and kissed him softly at first, and then he deepened the kiss, his hands traveling up and down Michael's back, then threading his fingers through the thick silkiness of Michael's hair. This is what he'd missed most while he was in the hospital. Michael's mouth was a feast of delights. The way his tongue teased, and demanded, then ultimately surrendered to Ben's heat, to his passion, his desire, his need. He'd missed the feel of Michael's hands searching for the sweet spot, in the dead center of his back, the spot that made him moan whenever Michael traced his fingers lightly over it.
He'd missed the way Michael would sometimes tiptoe in order to bring them closer to one another. He'd missed the way he'd sometimes collapse his body so that he molded himself around the smaller mans frame. He'd missed the sweet little sounds Michael made in the back of his throat when he was aroused. Michael stepped back causing Ben to groan loudly at the separation. Ben looked down at Michael and saw the sexiest look in Michael's eyes, an intoxicating mixture of raw animal sex, and adoring love, it made Ben weak in the knees. /connection/
Taking both of his hands Michael raked his fingers through his hair, a slow smile creeping across his face lighting the edges of his eyes. His hands having traveled through his hair, went slyly down the back of his neck, then around to the front of his chest, then on down his abdomen, resting cross ways over his body at the tails of his shirt. Then slowly, so that Ben could take it all in he started to pull the shirt over his head, exposing his taught skin one inch at a time. Finally when the shirt was off Michael stepped into Ben and started slowly to unbutton his shirt placing small kisses on each new flash of exposed flesh. For whatever reason Ben knew he shouldn't move, it was as if Michael were casting a spell, and he felt a little dizzy, but wonderfully so.
Once Ben's shirt was open and Michael had guided it off of his now tingling shoulders, and down his goose bump arms, Michael turned and walked away, heading slowly towards the bedroom. For a moment Ben was paralyzed, he wanted more than his life to run behind Michael, but his legs wouldn't move. Slowly his mind racing he willed himself to follow Michael into the bedroom. What he saw once he reached to doorway was by far the most astoundingly beautiful thing he'd ever seen.
Michael lay naked in the center of the bed, propped up on his elbows, his head back, the creamy smoothness of his neck exposed, one knee up, the other leg elongated, his back arched, his eyes closed, and then as if on cue he licked his lips. Ben nearly tripped taking off the rest of his clothes, all the while his eyes where glued to the smaller naked man in his bed. /exaltation/
Once Michael felt the pressure of the bed move under Ben's weight he lifted his head opened his eyes slowly and lay back, he then reached up and pulled Ben on top of him, and held him, gently gliding his hands over Ben's back, as Ben kissed and sucked on his neck. Then Michael placed a hand on either side of Ben's head and guided it up, he looked in Ben's eyes for what seemed like forever and slowly mouthed the words.
"I missed you."
"I missed you too." Ben mouthed back then kissed Michael tenderly.
When they made love it was like a slow dance to mythical music that only they could hear, and where composing with each movement of their bodies. The way they came together, and separated, the way Ben seemed to cling to Michael as the sweat from their bodies mingled and began to glisten. Making a symphony of that slick wet sound bodies make when they come together. The way Michael moved in concert with Ben, as if accompanying a master musician with Michael's body being the instrument. It was different from anything either of them had ever experienced before. Almost as if they were new to each other, yet strangely not.When they climaxed together it was amid a torrent of kisses and I love you's. Their bodies thundering against each other, a storm of illness, separation, passion and desire, quenched. Ben fell asleep with Michael's legs still wrapped around him, his face buried in Michael's shoulder. He held and was held, he loved and was loved, he was protector and protected.
Michael held Ben close to him, feeling Ben's heart beating against his chest. He was stroking his hair with one hand, and rubbing his back with the other. All the while a single tear rolling down the side of his face. He hadn't known how he'd kept that from happening hours ago while Ben was inside of him. While Ben was stroking him and raining down a sea of kisses on his face, neck, and shoulders. Maybe it was that strength Brian told him about what seemed like years ago, but in fact had only been a few days ago.
And that's all it was, a few days ago, Ben had been in a hospital near death, his life consisting of tubes, pain medication, and corny jokes that Michael had forced himself to tell him. Anything to make him want to stay, make him fight to stay. Only a few days ago when the man lying on top of him now had been hours from not being here at all. Only a few days ago Michael was wondering what his life would be like without Ben, wondering how he could survive life without him, how he could survive the pain of the void Ben would leave in his life. And knowing somewhere that he really didn't want to, but that he'd have to. Only a few days ago...only a few days ago. And now that sweetest sound in the world is hearing Ben breathe. /breathe/