Underwear    

Rated R for m/m premise and sexual activity. 

Disclaimer: I just get possessed by these characters, I don't own them. No
point in suing me, blah blah, rand/dollar exchange rate... 

This story came about because I was listening to Pulp's song "Underwear"
while thinking of Due South. Then I got this vision of what Fraser would
look like in his underwear, and, well, this story is the result. The song
doesn't really fit the story, but I've put the relevant lyrics here
anyway. 

 UNDERWEAR 

By T'Mar 

 Why don't you shut the door and close the curtains Cause you're not going
anywhere He's coming up the stairs and in a moment He'll want to see your
underwear 

 I couldn't stop it now, there's no way to get out He's standing far too
near how the hell did you get here Standing naked in somebody else's room
I'd give my whole life to see it, and just you stood there Only in your
underwear 

 If you could close your eyes and just remember That this is what you
wanted last night So why is it so hard for you to touch him... 

 Ray ran up the stairs to Fraser's apartment, worried that something might
have happened to him. Ray had called the Consulate, wanting to ask Benny
if he needed a lift home after work, but Fraser had not been there. He'd
taken a personal day, they had informed him. 

This was odd. Benny *never* took personal days, and he never took time off
unless he'd been stabbed, shot or beaten up. 

He knocked; there was no answer. He opened the door cautiously, peering
in. Benny was there all right; standing at the kitchen window clad only in
a pair of boxer shorts. 

Ray walked towards him. "Benny? Didn't you hear me knocking?" 

"I heard you, Ray." 

"Why didn't you answer the door? Are you sick?" 

"No." 

"Then what is it? Benny?" Ray advanced on his friend, worried. This wasn't
like him at all. "Do you realise you're standing at the window wearing
your underwear?" 

Fraser didn't look at him. "Yes, Ray." 

"Benny, talk to me!" 

Fraser's shoulders slumped slightly. "I... It's been a year since... since
Victoria left." 

Oh G-d. Ray swallowed hard. Victoria, that bitch. She'd hurt Benny and he
*had* tried to kill her, only... "You mean it's been a year since I shot
you," he said. The scar was clearly visible on Fraser's naked back. 

"No, Ray. I wasn't thinking about that, I... I was going to leave with
her. That's what I was thinking of." 

"What, you're wishing you'd made it, gone with her?" 

"No, I..." Fraser found it hard to talk. "I'm glad I didn't go. I know it
would never have worked. But... it's hard to convince my heart of that
sometimes. And then I wonder why I stayed." 

"Because I shot you, that's why." Ray wasn't sure he could ever forgive
himself for that, even though Benny had managed to shoot him as well. He
touched the scar carefully with his fingertips. 

Fraser jerked as though someone had shot electricity through him. "Ray..."


"I know it, Benny. If I'd missed, you'd have been gone with her. It would
have been a mistake." 

"No..." Fraser said, very softly, in a whisper, almost. 

"Yes, it would have, Benny. You said so." 

"No, not that." Fraser wasn't sure he could say it, but if he didn't...
"Ray..." 

"What, Benny?" 

"Don't stop." 

Ray felt as if he'd been slammed into a wall. Sure, he was touching Benny,
but it was just a comforting touch... wasn't it? And if that was so, why
was he enjoying it so much? He'd often wondered what it would be like to
just touch Benny for no reason except to touch him... but he hadn't dwelt
on those thoughts. They were just random thoughts, he'd figured. He took
his hand away despite having to force himself to remove it. "Benny..."
What the hell was going on with the two of them? 

Fraser turned around, then, and grabbed his hand, placing it on his chest,
just resting there. Ray looked at his hand on Benny as though he had never
seen it before. Then he looked into those determined blue eyes. He had
never in his life thought that he would ever touch Benny like this. His
mouth was suddenly dry as he absorbed the sensation of Benny's skin under
his hand. He wanted to say something, anything, to tell Fraser... what,
exactly? He didn't know. And finally, all he could get out was, "Why?" 

Fraser looked embarrassed and stepped away so that Ray had to remove his
hand. "I just needed that connection, just for a minute, Ray... So I could
remember why I stayed." 

"Okay." Ray sighed with relief... and something else. "And did you?" 

"Yes." 

"And why did you stay? Aside from the fact that I shot you, I mean." 

"For you, Ray." 

"For me?" Ray repeated it as if he didn't understand. 

"Yes. Because I love you." Fraser said it; it was out in the open now. And
he realised this might be the end of their friendship. But sometimes, some
things had to be said. 

"WHAT?!" asked Ray, almost yelling. He had never acknowledged that he had
any feelings for Benny, but touching him this way... It had almost been
like opening a floodgate. Ray felt his blood coursing through his veins;
he felt like he was in another dimension. He couldn't believe this. 

Fraser only said, "You heard me, Ray." 

"Yeah, but..." Ray stepped back, looking into Fraser's face. "Whaddaya
mean, you love me?" 

"I just do." 

"Benny, I don't understand." But that wasn't the truth - he *did*
understand; he understood only too well. But maybe this was just... just
the trauma of remembering that night at the train station. And if he let
something happen now, if he *admitted* it now, they might both regret it
tomorrow. 

"I know you don't." Fraser stepped forward, closer to him. "I'll make it
clear, Ray." He leaned in and kissed Ray, right on the mouth, right there
in the kitchen. 

When Benny's lips touched his, Ray nearly fainted with shock. He wanted
nothing more than to kiss Benny right back, to taste him and be tasted...
But he forced himself to keep his mouth closed, not to lead Benny on. And
when Fraser ended it and stepped away Ray only whispered, "Oh." He
whispered it because he knew that his voice would be very shaky if he
spoke aloud. 

"'Oh', Ray? Is that all?" Fraser was thinking that he couldn't really hope
for anything more; he'd never really realised before just why he'd stayed,
why Victoria's leaving hadn't hurt him as much as he'd expected it to,
though it *had* hurt. He certainly didn't dream that Ray could feel that
way about him. He'd never seen one indication of it. But then he'd never
provided any indications of his own, either. 

Ray just stood there looking at him, not wanting his friend to do
something he might regret. Benny's friendship meant more to him than
anything else. So he only said, "I dunno what else to say, Benny. You made
it clear what you meant, that you love me. But this doesn't have to affect
our friendship. You're my best friend, Benny, and..." He trailed off, not
quite sure what he was trying to say. He couldn't tell Benny the truth...
could he? 

"And what? Shall we pretend I never said anything, that I never kissed
you?" 

"That'd be my first choice, yeah." 

"Even though I love you?" 

Ray looked down - anything to avoid those piercing, blue eyes. But then he
saw... Oh G-d. Fraser was only wearing boxer shorts, and they didn't hide
the truth. He swallowed. This was going to be difficult. He knew he was
having the same reaction; luckily he was wearing a coat. "I..." 

Fraser just stood there, thinking he'd made a huge mistake. They could go
back to what had been, he knew they could. This... feeling... only
overwhelmed him at certain times, like the anniversary of Ray shooting
him. It was always there, he realised, but only now had he felt the need
to let it out, to say it to Ray. "We can go back, if you want to," he
finally said. "You're my best friend." 

And when Fraser said that, Ray suddenly knew that Fraser really *did* love
him. Because true love was like that - all you wanted was for the person
you loved to be happy. And if he told him the truth - that he did return
those feelings - then what? And suddenly Ray didn't care what. He just
wanted to tell Benny, wanted to kiss Benny, wanted... He did want to make
love to Benny, he realised. He did. But first he had to get something else
out of the way. "Benny... you know I shot you by accident, don't you?" 

"Of course, Ray." 

"It was *her* I was trying to shoot, you know that, too, huh?" 

"Yes. But you were only doing your duty, Ray. She *was* a criminal..." 

"No, Benny. I wanted to stop her from taking you away from me. I would
have killed her to stop her." He paused, closing his eyes briefly. "But I
shot you instead. And I guess it worked, because you're still here." 

"What are you saying?" Fraser asked him. It sounded... hopeful, from his
point of view. 

"I... Ah, geez, Benny. I couldn't let her do that, take you away. I had to
protect you. I always feel like I have to protect you, even when I know
you'd survive much better than me out in the Yukon or somewhere." 

"This isn't the Yukon, Ray," Fraser pointed out. 

"Yeah, I know, and I tell myself that all the time. This is Chicago, you
need me." 

"I do need you," Fraser whispered softly. 

"And, see, Benny, I need you to need me. I like it that I take you places
and stuff." Ray paused and took a deep breath. Now he could tell the
truth. "I love you, Benny. I've loved you for a long time. But... I never
thought about it, not until now. And it's a little scary." 

"Why?" 

"You think people would accept us... as a couple? I doubt it. I don't want
people to insult you because of me." 

"Nothing anybody could say would ever hurt me, Ray. Nothing. As long as
you're with me, I can deal with anything. You must have noticed that." 

"I guess I have." Ray stepped closer to the Mountie, and *really* kissed
him this time, feeling Benny's tongue tentatively touch his own, and then
Benny dived right in and tasted Ray's mouth, and Ray tasted his, too. Both
men could feel their breathing accelerate, and then Ray needed more than
just a kiss. He moved right against Benny, wrapping his arms around him,
grinding his own pelvis against Benny's, feeling Benny's hardness, letting
Benny feel his. 

Fraser, in turn, put his arms around Ray and held on, feeling safe and
secure, feeling... fulfilled. His heart was full; if lightning struck him
now, he could die happy. And then Ray's hand sneaked into his boxer shorts
and touched his erection, and Fraser froze. 

"Benny?" Ray opened his eyes and looked at him in concern. 

"I... I don't think I was prepared for... that," he whispered, his
breathing still ragged. 

"Okay." Ray let him go and took off his coat. Then his suit, his shirt,
his undershirt... Fraser stared. When Ray was down to only his underwear,
Fraser suddenly said, "Ray!" 

Ray was grinning his most self-satisfied grin. "Yeah, Benny?" 

"Don't." 

"You wanna stand around in our underwear?" 

"I..." 

"You don't want this?" Ray tried not to let disappointment into his voice.


"I do want it, Ray, I just... this is all new to me. I need... a little
time." 

Ray was confused all of a sudden. Benny *didn't* want this? But Benny had
been the one who started it! Ray then took a second to think about things.
He knew he was one for rushing in where angels fear to tread. When he made
a decision, he went into it full-speed. But Benny... maybe he needed to do
things more slowly. "Okay. Come and sit down on the bed." He started in
that direction, Benny's hand clutched in his. But Fraser pulled away.
"No!" 

Ray felt the beginnings of disappointment. He didn't *want* to go slowly,
to stop and think, not now. If he did, he might change his mind about all
this. But, oh G-d, he wanted Benny so much! "Well, whaddaya want, then,
Fraser?" His tone was one of slight belligerence. 

"I want you, Ray, but..." 

"Yeah?" 

"That... I..." Here was something he didn't have a euphemism or Inuit
story for. 

"The sex scares you, is that it?" Ray let him off the hook. 

Fraser didn't look at him. "Yes." 

"Benny, I know you're not a virgin. Surely you've..." He stopped. What
could he say? "I mean, surely you must have done... you know, other
things." 

"No, Ray." 

"You've never had a woman do it... you know... orally?" he finally said.
'Great Vecchio, make things real easy!' he thought. Ray knew he wasn't the
most sexually experienced man under the sun, but even his wife had wanted
a change once in a while. Change was good, it was healthy. 

"No, Ray." 

Ray was stunned. "What, never? Victoria, she didn't..." Victoria struck
him as the kind of woman who was into whips and chains, actually, but he
didn't say that to Benny. 

Fraser shook his head. "She..." He faltered. "She tried, once, and..." 

"You wouldn't let her." 

Benny nodded this time. "I thought it was... demeaning to her, somehow. I
wanted us to... share each other." 

Ray just smiled. He *loved* Benny so much! And this was typical Benny:
always thinking of the other person. "Benny, you should learn to relax,
let other people do things for you." 

"Not that, Ray. What... what would they get out of it?" 

"Maybe they want to do something nice for someone, Benny. You do that all
the time. Sometimes people don't even thank you. But do you stop? No. This
is the same thing, okay?" And Ray deliberately put his hand back into
Fraser's underwear, touching him. "Don't move, Benny." 

"Ray..." 

Ray looked at him very seriously. "Don't move." 

All the tension and fear seemed to drain from the Mountie. "Understood."
And then Ray yanked the shorts down, until they landed around Benny's feet
on the floor. Ray knelt down. He was too scared to suggest the bed again;
it might make Fraser bolt. So he just knelt down right where he was. "You
gotta let people do things for you, Benny. You deserve it." And he touched
his mouth to his friend's erection, just tasting at first, then licking,
then... 

Fraser balanced precariously on some undefined edge, managing to stay
upright by sheer force of will. The tasting was good, the slow, sensuous
licks were better... but when he felt a sudden suction, it was all over.
Fraser let out a harsh cry, the orgasm so powerful that he couldn't remain
standing any longer, and ended up on the floor next to Ray, who promptly
took him into his arms while he waited for Fraser's breathing to steady.
"You see, Benny?" he finally said when it did, "sometimes it can be good
to let people do things for you." 

Benny moved away then, and looked into Ray's deep, dark eyes. "I...
Ray..." 

"What, Benny?" 

"Why?" 

 

"Because I love you, okay?" And as far as Ray was concerned, that was all
that needed to be said. 

Fraser still wasn't too happy. "I don't know if I can..." He trailed off. 

But Ray was sympathetic. "You don't have to, Benny. Really." 

"I..." What could he say? 'Gee, thanks for doing that, but I'm not going
to do the same for you.'?? Tears came to his eyes and he shut them. "I..."
Nothing would come out. Fraser, like his father, never spoke about things
like this. Not feelings, not sex, nothing. 

"We can do something else," Ray said, quietly. 

Now Fraser opened his eyes again, fearful. "I... I don't think..." 

"Not that, Benny." He knew that if oral sex frightened Benny, then the
idea of anal sex probably scared the hell out of him. 

"What, then?" 

"Stand up." 

This time Fraser obeyed first time, and Ray made him step out of his
underwear, taking his own off at the same time. "Bed, Benny." He could see
Benny wanted it, and wanted it badly, but he could also see that he was
still afraid of the experience. 

Fraser did lie on the bed, though, and he looked at Ray, desire and
apprehension warring in those clear blue eyes. Ray lay down on top of him,
pressing himself against Benny, making sure their erections were touching,
loving the feel of Benny's most intimate parts pressed against his own. He
squirmed slightly, fitting himself against Benny as best he could, to get
the best effect. "How about this?" he finally asked, seeing that the
Mountie was breathing heavily again, obviously enjoying this as well. 

"Oh, G-d, Ray!" Fraser looked up at him, wishing they could just blend
together. 

"You okay with this, Benny?" 

"Y... yes." When Ray didn't move he was forced to say more. "Please,
Ray..." 

"Yeah, what?" It was hard to control himself, hard *not* to move against
Benny, but Ray forced himself to be still. He was going to make Fraser
*ask*. If they had any hope of being a couple, of enjoying this to the
full, he had to get rid of Fraser's inhibitions. 

"I... I want you. Please." 

"Please what, Benny?" 

Then Fraser realised what Ray wanted. He wanted them both to let go, to
forget about society, to forget about the constraints they imposed on
themselves. "Please move, Ray. I need... I need to feel you." Ray smiled,
then, and kissed him. It was the first time they'd kissed since Ray had
knelt on the floor and made love to Benny with his mouth. Fraser tasted
himself there, and wondered... 

Coherent thought suddenly fled as Ray did move, and Ray's body against his
felt like the most wonderful thing in the world. It *was*, for them.
Fraser moved upwards in a slight counterpoint to Ray's rhythm, lifting
both himself and Ray partly off the bed, having to roll to the side to
prevent Ray falling. Now there was more freedom of movement, and they took
full advantage of it, moving against each other, faster, faster... 

"Benny!" 

"Oh! Ray!" 

They woke at roughly the same time a little later, still face to face.
"Hey, Benny," smiled Ray. 

"Ray." Fraser still looked a little uncertain. "I... I liked that." 

"Well, good." 

"I think... I'd like to try... something else." 

"Yeah? What?" 

"This." He pushed Ray onto his back and leaned over him, kissing and
licking his way down Ray's body, trying to imprint each taste and smell on
his senses forever. His mouth finally reached its destination, and he
sniffed first, then licked once, experimentally. 

Ray arched off the bed. "G-d! Benny!" 

"Should I..." No, this wasn't the time for questions of that nature. Don't
ask, do. If he likes it you'll know. 

He licked again, then once more, and by the look on Ray's face he was
doing something right. Now he could ask. "Do you like that, Ray?" 

"Oh, yeah, Benny. Whatever you do, don't stop." 

"All right." He captured the detective's erection with his mouth, letting
his tongue still do some of the work, and then applying suction in the
same way Ray had earlier. He guessed Ray had done that because that was
what he liked. And he was right. He'd hardly started sucking when Ray
arched almost completely off the bed, and came right into his mouth. 

Not knowing what else to do, Fraser swallowed. Strange taste, he mused as
he did so, frowning in concentration. As he looked up, he saw Ray watching
him with passion still in his eyes. "What, Ray?" 

"That's just as arousing, Benny." 

"What?" 

"Seeing you swallow. I didn't think you'd do that." 

"I..." He couldn't lie, not to Ray. "I didn't know where... I didn't know
what else to do." He ducked his head. 

"I know, Benny. It was still great to see." He smiled. "So... you still
think the person gets nothing out of it?" 

"No, Ray." Fraser had found that to cause such feelings in Ray made him
feel wonderful; loved. 

Ray just looked at him oddly. "No?" 

"I mean, no, I don't think... Yes, you were right... Ray," Fraser finally 

said in a stern tone. He'd just realised Ray was teasing him. 

"I really love you, Benny." 

"And I love you." 

"I don't ever wanna be parted again, Benny. Never. But I don't know how
you'll feel... once it becomes reality. People *will* say stuff... and
maybe they'll do more than just talk, too." 

"I told you, Ray. I can handle it if you're with me. We don't have to tell
anybody, not if you don't want to." 

"Okay, then we won't. But we'd better go get documents made up that if
something happens to one of us... you know what I'm saying, Benny?" 

"Yes, and I agree, it's a sensible precaution." 

"You wanna move in together?" Ray looked hopefully into Fraser's eyes. 

Fraser looked uncertainly around his apartment. "I thought you didn't like
my apartment, Ray." 

Ray grinned. "I hate it, Benny. But we can get our own." 

"What about your house? I mean, it is yours." 

"My family lives there. I wanna be with you, just the two of us. So
whaddaya say, Benny?" 

"Yes, Ray." Fraser smiled and kissed him, their tongues duelling happily
for a moment. Then he pulled away. "What will we tell people?" 

"That I got sick of living with my sisters!" 

"Is that it?" 

"I dunno. We'll think of something later." Ray put his arms around Fraser
then, and felt Fraser's arms go around him. They snuggled up together,
feeling whole and complete. Ray's last thought before falling asleep was
that in the morning he'd know it wasn't a dream. In fact, it would be hard
for anyone to mistake what had gone on... not with two pairs of underwear
lying conspicuously in the middle of the room. 

THE END