Good Night, Irene, Good Night GOOD NIGHT IRENE, GOOD NIGHT 

by Jennifer Swanson 

 Ben noticed, for the second day in a row, that Ray was driving a new and
unusual round-about way to get them to work. He hadn't asked yesterday why
he had changed it, because the enigmatic look on Ray's face at the time,
made him steer clear for fear of angering his friend. Afterall Ray was
doing him a good turn by agreeing to carpool him to work; he didn't want
to push his luck. Besides he figured that it was either a mistake or Ray
had an errand to run in this area. But today they were going this route
again. His curiosity just couldn't be held in check any longer, "Ray, I've
noticed this is the second day, in as many, we've gone this way to work.
Why aren't you going the usual route? Is there a problem with the old
way?" Ray knew that Ben would eventually ask him this. What surprised him
was that his normally observant and curious friend hadn't asked him this
same question yesterday. He snapped out a quick, "Its a short-cut, ok?"
Ray spared a quick glance in the rearview mirror and could see Fraser
working on the math and logic in his head to prove it wasn't. He wasn't
disappointed, "Ray it takes us at least 7 minutes longer to go this way
rather than the old way. I fail to see how you can consider this a 'short
cut'. Besides which its highly likely we'll get caught behind that school
bus again on Taylor Boulevard." The bus in question was right on schedule
and ahead of them. Ray, who would normally have been frustrated and
angered to have been forced to go slower, actually seemed pleased that the
bus was there. 

Ben started to really study his friend closely now. Something more was
going on here than just this so-called "short-cut". They were following an
elementary school bus, which periodically made stops along the way to pick
up a few small children here and there in front of different homes. 

At the third stop since following the bus, Ray's face changed. Was it
possible to look both happy and sad at the same time? That's what it
seemed like to Ben. He couldn't make out what was going on in his friend's
head and he decided he wouldn't press. If Ray wanted to tell him, he would
in his own way and time. It was also then that he noticed Ray paying
particular attention to one of the children at this stop. The child was a
young boy about 10 or 11 years old. He was thin, with dark hair and
mediterranean looks. The boy was also very high-spirited, as he horsed
around with some of the other children at the stop. It was when the child
smiled, it struck Ben that Ray must have looked alot like this boy at that
age. "Do you know that boy Ray?", he asked. "No, never met him. Seems like
a good kid. Reminds me of me at that age." "Its funny you said that,
because I was just thinking he looks a little like you must have when you
were a boy. I thought maybe he was a nephew or cousin of your's. You seem
to be related to most of Chicago Ray.", he laughed at that. But the
comment hit too close to home for Ray. He couldn't keep his secret locked
up inside any longer, he needed to share this with someone he trusted,
"Benny, he is related to me. But not a nephew or cousin. He's my son." 

There were so many things about his best friend that he didn't know, but
he would have thought that if his friend had had a son he would have told
him earlier than now. "I don't mean to pry into your personal business
Ray, but you recently told me about your ex-wife Angie. Is she the
mother?" 

Ray swallowed the lump caught in his throat, "No. He's Irene's son too. I
just found out about him after she died. A mutual friend visited me last
week. She said that Irene had made her promise to deliver a letter to me,
should she ever die. In it she told me about Kyle, my son." Ray hit on the
highlights of the letter Irene had left for him, but every word was burned
into his soul now: 

MY DEAREST RAY, 

IF YOU'RE READING THIS, THEN ALICE KEPT HER PROMISE TO ME. SHE'S BEEN A
TRUE FRIEND AND CONFIDANTE TO ME FOR MOST OF MY LIFE. IF YOU HAVE ANY
QUESTIONS ABOUT ANYTHING I'M ABOUT TO TELL YOU, SHE MAY BE ABLE TO HELP. 

I DON'T KNOW WHERE OR HOW TO BEGIN. I SUPPOSE I'LL START WITH SAYING, WITH
ALL MY HEART, THAT YOU ARE MY ONLY TRUE LOVE. I'M SORRY THAT I WAS SUCH A
COWARD. IF I HADN'T BEEN, I WOULD HAPPILY BE YOUR WIFE, AS YOU ONCE ASKED
OF ME. I'M STILL HAUNTED BY THE LOOK ON YOUR FACE, WHEN YOU CAME TO MY
WINDOW READY TO ELOPE AND I TURNED YOU AWAY. MY FATHER HAD WALKED BY MY
DOOR THEN AND I PANICKED. I HAVE ALWAYS REGRETTED NOT GOING WITH YOU. 

WE NEVER GOT TO SEE EACH OTHER AGAIN AFTER THAT, BECAUSE I WAS SHIPPED OFF
TO TRAVEL THROUGH EUROPE SOON AFTER. DAD THOUGHT IT WOULD DO ME SOME GOOD
TO BE AWAY FROM HERE. BUT I KNOW HE MEANT, SO I'D BE AWAY FROM YOU. 

WHAT YOU AND MY FAMILY DIDN'T KNOW WAS THAT I WAS PREGNANT WHEN I LEFT. 

I WAS YOUNG, SCARED AND STUPID, BUT I KNEW I WANTED YOUR CHILD IN OUR
WORLD, EVEN IF I COULDN'T KEEP HIM WITH ME. WHILE I WAS IN PARIS, ON MAY
1, 1985, I DELIVERED A BEAUTIFUL HEALTHY BABY BOY. I NAMED HIM KYLE
RAYMOND. 

NO ONE BUT ALICE, MY TRAVELLING COMPANION AT THE TIME, KNEW THAT I HAD
THIS CHILD. I STAYED IN EUROPE FOR 3 MONTHS MORE AFTER HIS BIRTH, BUT I
COULDN'T KEEP AWAY FROM MY FAMILY MUCH LONGER. 

I COULDN'T LET MY FAMILY KNOW ABOUT KYLE, SO ALICE AND I DEVISED A PLAN
WHERE SHE WOULD CLAIM OUR SON AS HER'S. SHE'S BEEN CARING FOR HIM EVER
SINCE AND LOVES HIM AS IF HE WERE REALLY HER OWN. I'VE BEEN HELPING
SUPPORT HIM AND HAVE PROVISIONS IN MY WILL TO CONTINUE TO DO SO. 

I WAS LUCKY TO BE ABLE TO WATCH HIM GROW UP, BY VISITING WITH HIM WHENEVER
I COULD. HE REMINDS ME ALOT OF YOU, ESPECIALLY HIS EXPRESSIVE EYES AND
BEAUTIFUL SMILE. IT ALWAYS HURT WHEN HE'D CALL ME AUNT IRENE. IT HURT EVEN
MORE TO KNOW THAT YOU AND HE WEREN'T IN MY LIFE, THE WAY YOU SHOULD HAVE
BEEN. 

I'M SORRY. 

GOOD-BYE MY LOVE, 

IRENE 

The End