Inside

by Voyagerbabe


Author's Webpage:http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Starship/6102/home.html

Author's disclaimer:

There once was a company from Toronto,

Who owned the worlds best TV show.

Places, wolves, people, and plot,

All the rights they have got,

But here I can do what I want to.


***


What if I held out a gift to a little girl,

Wrapped in bows and ribbons bright,

But when she opened the package,

She released a scorpion to bite?


What if I offered to a little boy,

A shiny new model plane,

But it hid spines within the wings,

Drawing only blood and pain?


I see you reacting in horror now,

Not to a child, this unforgivable sin.

Mustn't hold the promise of sweetness,

While hiding cruel betrayal within.


Someone please tell me the reason,

That while a child makes this wrong,

An adult is expected to bear it,

To pull together and carry on?


Did adolescence steal my feelings,

Is it all right now that I am a man?

To hold out relief from loneliness,

Then snatch it back from my hands?


Do you think it doesn't hurt me,

To think I might not be alone,

Then turn around only to find,

The softness has turned to stone?


God, please tell me why I'm cursed,

With a pleasant face and eyes of blue?

Does this make my feelings any less,

Because 'the women are waiting for you'?


As though I were a prize to win,

They see me as conquest alone.

If I let them 'bag the Mountie',

I would soon again be on my own.


Is there not a single woman out there,

Who wants me for love, not lust?

One who will not hurt me,

One whom I can trust.


I once loved with a heady passion,

Gift from a past I thought lost behind.

But as I lay in the blood of a broken heart,

I learned only that love is truly blind.


I thought the feelings were dead,

I could never again be weak that way.

But then came another woman,

And 'never' was closer each day.


Yet even she held scorpion's sting,

As her dark eyes bled dry my heart.

For though she teases and we kissed,

Cold rank holds us forever apart.


A woman came from the woods,

With the children I so desire,

But she had held back a secret,

That stabbed cold through the fire.


Another was danger from the first,

But this time I played her game.

Bluff and call, fold and deal,

Wouldn't let her be the same.


This one wouldn't break my heart,

I had finally learned what to do.

If I hold it inside it can't be hurt,

Like it was when others could view.


I wish I could offer it up again,

Find a woman to make me whole.

Raise children, become a family,

With the missing piece of my soul.


All I have to do is unbury my heart,

Close my eyes and try once again.

Somewhere out there she is waiting,

But I have to find her and let her in.


I hadn't expected this to happen,

But it's too late to do anything now.

I'd like to offer my heart for love

Except I've forgotten how.