Discovery

by Courser

Author's disclaimer: All characters and concepts are property of Alliance Communications. No infringement is intended, so please don't sue me. I don't have anything you'd want anyway.

Author's notes: Written some time ago, this is my first foray into the slash arena. I extend my thanks to Manna LaDroit, who acted as both mentor and supportive beta-reader. And yes, I'll continue writing het stories as well


Discovery

By Courser

Warnings: NC-17 slash

Pairings: Fraser/Vecchio (the real one)

Spoilers: None (well maybe a little one for Victoria's Secret)

Fraser and Vecchio walked into the small room. They'd been assigned to stakeout and Vecchio, currently on Lieutenant Welsh's good list, had snagged the jacuzzi. The rest of the team had been assigned to other areas in and around the bathhouse, but he'd gotten the plum for him and Benny. They could have just as easily been assigned to stand in the bitter cold outside, camouflaged as drunks, or worse.

Jack Huey's snitch had gotten a tip that Tony Simone, up and coming hard guy, was going to order a hit on Jimmy McKenna, the right hand man of the well-established O'Reilly crime family. Simone had scheduled a meet with the hit man for 9:00 this evening in the steam room. If all went well, Simone would pass the hired killer the key to a locker at the bathhouse where a packet containing the specifics on the target and partial payment had been stashed.

The simple plan was to allow the meet in the steam room to take place and arrest the professional when he tried to access the locker. Timed correctly, they should be able to take down Simone and his goons, as well as the hit man himself, safely and quietly. Since it was Huey's snitch, he was going to take down Simone leaving the steam room, with Welsh grabbing the hit man at the locker. Fraser and Ray were to sit tight in the private room ready to assist should things get rough.

White ceramic tile covered the walls, cedar benches at right angles along two of them. A stack of fluffy white towels had been left on a low table next to a curtained alcove. Ray was dressed in one of his better suits while Fraser was wearing his typical off duty clothes consisting of boots and jeans topped with a flannel shirt and leather jacket.

Fraser took in the large, deep tub full of steaming water.

"I was unaware that communal bathing was customary in this urban environment.'

"Think of it as a sweat lodge, kinda." Ray walked over and turned a knob, activating the jets, making the water boil "It's great for sore muscles, relaxing, god, I love these things."

"Aahh. Similar to a hot mineral spring, then."

"Yeah, I guess." Ray replied as he shed his overcoat, jacket and tie as a concession to the warm humid atmosphere, hanging them on the pegs set into the wall. He kept his gun and cell phone close to him. Fraser, for his part, shed his leather jacket and heavy flannel shirt, stripping to his long sleeved henley. Unarmed, Ben sat on the bench closest to the door, getting the drop on anyone who entered it and providing Ray the opportunity to get a shot. Ray took the bench directly opposite the door.

"So, there a lot of hot springs up in the Yukon, Benny?" Ray asked.

"Not a lot, no, but there are some. Most of them have religious significance for the Inuit. Places of spiritual purification" Ben began, and as Ray had predicted, launched into a rather long old Inuit tale involving ancient deities and creation. He found that he enjoyed listening to his partner's voice, the warmth and humidity lulling him into a more relaxed state.

He leaned back against the tiled wall, stretching his long legs in front of him. Fraser, though he still appeared to be attentive, leaned back on his bench as well, lower legs remaining at a precise right angle to the upper, hands clasped in front of him when they weren't being used to illustrate a point. Letting Ben's quiet voice lull him, Vecchio reflected that Ben used his hands quite a bit in speaking. Not as much as an Italian, he thought with a smile, but more than was usual. He found he was watching Benny's hands as much as he watched his face. Actually his hands were often more expressive, fingers twitching and entwining as he talked.

The cell phone beeped and Vecchio picked it up immediately.

"Vecchio"

"Yeah, great...and Simone?...Perfect...Thanks Lieu."

"Mr. Simone was apprehended?" Ben asked.

"Yep, and Welsh took down the hit man. I'm officially off duty."

Ray stood and began stripping off his clothes, starting with the buttons on his shirt, pulling it out of his trousers. Fraser watched Ray undress, just a bit confused. A little flutter rose in his chest as Ray unbuckled his belt and dropped his trousers. He'd carefully schooled himself against the unresolved feelings he harbored for his partner. He hadn't been attracted to a man since high school and that had been entirely in the realm of fantasy. As he'd matured, he'd dismissed it as a form of hero worship and forgotten about it after his first experience with a woman.

Until, that is, he'd come to Chicago and been partnered with Ray Vecchio. It was only in the dark hours of the night that he'd dare acknowledge the infatuation, only to bury it again with the dawn. He watched, unknowingly licking his lower lip, as Ray carefully folded his pants and dropped his shorts, naked as the day he was born. Ben took in the finely made man before him, unmoving, hands carefully folded in his lap as Ray turned towards him. Ray's shoulders looked broader, tapering to narrow hips, a sprinkling of hair on his chest, diminishing to a thin line descending the midline of his torso to a dark patch at his groin. Without changing his point of focus, Ben took in the sight of his partner. He'd had other opportunities, of course, but he'd always been careful to avert his eyes. Besides which, the sight of another man urinating was hardly very interesting. This was different, somehow, more intimate.

"Benny, whatcha waitin' for? Come on you'll love this, I promise."

Ben was hesitant to follow suit, an unaccustomed shyness rising in him, though he was at a loss to explain why. He'd never really felt any reluctance around men before, but suddenly he was very aware of his own pale skin, his lack of body hair, often a sign, though an incorrect one, of male virility. In comparison, Ray seemed a paragon of male secondary sex characteristics with his darker skin, sprinkling of hair and even his thinning hairline. <Well,> he thought as he bent to unlace his boots, <it's not as if this is a contest> and chastised himself for his infatuation with Ray, knowing that any physical interaction was entirely out of the question.

Ray stepped into the tub, somewhat surprised at Ben's reluctance. <It's not as if he grew up with a brother or anything> he explained to himself, thinking that probably very few people had ever seen him naked outside of his mother. <And Victoria> he added to himself, remembering the painful episode. For a moment he entertained the thought that Fraser might be one of those guys who only made love in the dark, so even she would have only a memory of how he felt. <Better not go there, Vecchio> he reminded himself, reprimanding himself for the direction his thoughts were taking him.

Ben pulled his shirt over his head, carefully folding it before placing it on the bench, while Ray watched the play of muscles across his back, his gaze drifting to the scar right above his waist. He closed his eyes, regret twisting inside him, remembering how Ben had stepped in front of the bullet a fraction of a second after he'd squeezed the trigger. Remembering him lying on the platform, pale and shaking, reciting some old poem.

He shook himself to rid himself of the haunting vision, opening his eyes to see Ben dropping his jeans, then his shorts, still facing the wall. Ben's skin was almost as pale and flawless as the tile and Ray's gaze drifted from the short dark hair on his head, over the smooth skin of his back down to the curve of his ass. Ray found he wanted to squeeze those perfect cheeks, stroke the slender hard thighs. Ben was not nearly so angular as Ray expected him to be.

In one smooth move, he turned around, a slight flush unmistakable even in the muted light. Ray felt a surge of affection for the man before him, his eyes widening slightly. Ben's eyes met his, almost in challenge, as he walked toward the tub. His chest was well muscled, the grooves of his ribs visible, his torso smooth to just below his navel. Below the cut of pelvic muscles, rising from a thatch of dark curls, his penis was well, different, in a way that Ray couldn't quite place. As Ben drew closer, Ray finally realized that Ben was uncircumcised, the foreskin hiding all but a tantalizing glimpse of the head of his cock. He also couldn't help noticing that Ben was semi-erect, blood swelling the shaft just enough to be noticeable. Ray smiled broadly as he returned his gaze to his friend's face.

"C'mon in, the water's fine." His voice quiet, far more seductive than the casual words implied.

He thought he saw Benny's cock twitch in the moment before it was submerged in the turbulent waters and his own flesh throbbed in response.

"Indeed it is, Ray." He was much relieved that Ray hadn't been discomfited by his semi-hard state, evident by his inviting smile. That voice was so...intimate, that he'd responded instantly, growing harder still. Ben positioned his back directly in front of a pair of jets and closed his eyes in pleasure.

"Mmmm. Oh, this really does feel good." His voice low, throaty, vibrating from the impact of the jets pounding his back

Ben's dark lashes fluttered against his fair skin, and Ray recognized the trust placed in him.

"Told ya, didn't I?" His own voice was sultry, foreign to his own ears.

"Hmm, mmm."

Ray closed his eyes, musing to himself, occasionally sneaking a glance at Benny, across from him. He'd always wondered a bit about what he'd look like out of that stifling uniform. He so rarely even wore casual clothes. His face was so young looking, must be the cold. But, sweet Jesus, his body was beautiful. His fingers were aching to touch the smooth skin of his chest, and his... Ray couldn't believe that he was getting hard thinking about another man's cock.

He'd always had a rather minor curiosity about uncut men. Oh, he'd occasionally get a glimpse of one now and then, but hanging around in men's restrooms was, well, highly inadvisable, especially for a Chicago cop. It was somehow fitting that Benny was in a completely natural state. He wondered if that's why Fraser'd been a little reluctant to shed his clothes, knowing that he was different, more than the fact that he'd been somewhat erect. Even Benny's gotta know that it happens. It's like the thing has a mind of it's own sometimes.

Ben was aware that it happened sometimes. But not like this. Yes, he'd gotten hard when he was feeling particularly aggressive and occasionally in the presence of his commanding officer, when she gave him a particularly harsh dressing down. That was a physical response to the need to dominate. But this was about his partner. The sight of him disrobing, so unconcerned, as if he did this every day of the week. The sight of Ray standing there had.....affected him, his most private thoughts suddenly brought to life. The desire to taste him, intoxicating. Ben was already completely familiar with his scent and could have picked him out of an entire room of men, blindfolded, by his smell alone. It was out of the question. He wouldn't compromise their friendship on something so.....selfish.

Ray wondered if Benny would mind if he asked him about it. The guy was incredibly forthcoming about some things, extremely closed about others.

"Hey, Benny" he started, surprised that the words had actually left his mouth.

"Yes, Ray"

Ray opened his eyes and watched Ben's face closely.

"I couldn't help but notice...I mean I've always kinda wondered..." he broke off, unsure of how to continue.

"About what?" Ben's eyes opened and met his, eyebrows raised. Ray knew that he wasn't as naive as he looked.

"Well, about, uh..." and Ray directed his gaze at the water over what he surmised would be Ben's lap.

"Oh, that." His voice a tad high pitched, looking down at himself, but otherwise seemingly nonchalant, "I was born in the Yukon, delivered by a midwife, hundreds of kilometers from medical facilities. Not to mention that circumcision isn't routinely practiced in Canada."

"I kinda figured that. I was, uh, wonderin', well, what it's...like, you know?" Ray asked, his face earnest, unspoken emotion glittering in his green eyes.

Ben smiled at him, eyes bright, "I don't have any comparative reference, Ray, any more than you do. I'd show you except, uh, it's not in its norm..."

"That's what I mean, Benny" He interrupted.

"Oh. Oh well, I suppose, if you're sure you, er..." While he'd thought about Ray in this way, he wasn't entirely sure of what his intent might be. He knew where he wanted it to lead, but would Ray follow?

Ben put his hands on the rim of the tub and effortlessly lifted himself up, sitting at the edge, his feet dangling in the roiling water. Ray watched the water sluice from his body, down his chest and belly, his eyes finally resting on Benny's cock, harder now, but still less than fully erect, the head just beginning to peek out from its sheath. Ray felt like he was falling, his stomach in his throat, lightheaded enough that he reached out for the closest solid object, Ben's thigh, looking up at his slight intake of breath. Ben looked down at him, a wry smile on his face and took Ray's hand in his.

Ray moved not a muscle, lost in the hunger of those bottomless eyes as Ben pressed his lips to Ray's palm, then drew his tongue across the center. The sensation raced up his arm to implode in his chest as Ben then placed it on his cock, folding the fingers around the base of the head, pulling back slightly. Like a rare flower, the head was exposed, expanding under his hand with a palpable rush of blood. Ben let out a long breath, his fingers clenching on Ray's before guiding them both forward, then back and taking his hand away completely. This time a drop of fluid appeared at the slit and again he felt faint, though this time he didn't wonder why, since his own cock had come alive, one of the water jets now caressing it gently.

"Jesus...Benny? You okay with this?" his voice almost failed him, throat parched and tight.

"I wouldn't have agreed if I weren't Ray." Quiet, but confident, no longer shy.

Ray grasped the base of Ben's rigid penis with his free hand, squeezing slightly, while he worked the foreskin over the head, varying the pressure, trying to find the right rhythm and sequence. Ben moaned quietly as he watched his friend stroke him, the head now glistening in the soft light. Ray was torn between watching Ben's cock and his face. He wanted, needed to break that perfect composure, to hear him cry out in pleasure, breathless with passion. Ray changed his hand position, playing his fingers along the shaft, gliding the tips over the sensitive underside of the head, slick and wet.

"Oh god...yes, Ray...oh...yes."

He smiled and squeezed again, the head swelling under his hands. He wanted to let it build with his own arousal, the water currents softly stroking his length.

Freeing one hand, he reached out and stroked Ben's chest, skin smooth and hot, then pinched one nipple between his fingers. He was rewarded by a breathless groan, Ben's cock surging against him. He trailed his hand down, briefly combing through the damp curls, past his other hand, still working relentlessly, to the soft sac below. Balancing it on the tips of his fingers, stroking the tender globes with his thumb, Ben let loose a long whimpering moan that sent fire down Ray's spine, making him harder still.

"Benny, do ya wanna come? Do you think ya can do that for me, huh?"

Panting, he nodded his head emphatically, "Uh huh." Eyes closed, tongue between his teeth, Ray didn't think he'd ever seen a more beautiful sight. Hand pumping faster now, he continued to stroke his balls with the other. A series of moans gradually rose in both pitch and volume as he felt Ben's cock expand, then explode, sending semen spurting into the air, landing on both of them. Ray wasn't entirely sure he hadn't come himself for a moment, the sense of wonder and satisfaction overwhelming. But the jets were still massaging him in a maddening way. He gave Ben a few strokes to bring him back to earth, blue eyes meeting his with a still unquenched fire.

"Thank you kindly, Ray. That was...remarkable." He jerked his head to the left, then the right, his neck muscles popping with the release of tension.

"But you know, while I'm quite familiar with your scent..." he dropped back into the water, taking Ray's hand in his again, "I've always wanted to taste you."

Ray didn't back away as Ben advanced on him. Putting his hands on either side of his head and bending to bring his mouth close to Ray's neck, he drew his tongue across the sensitive skin there. Ray sighed, leaning into the sensation. Ben's tongue traveled up his neck, detouring behind his ear, then down his jaw line, stopping short of his mouth. Pausing a moment, Ben looked into Ray's eyes and finding only affection and need, gently brushed his lips several times before stroking them with his tongue. Just as he was beginning to wonder if his kiss was welcome, a hand grasped the back of his head, pulling them together, Ray's mouth opening under his. Their tongues and teeth collided, fighting, challenging each other for position. Ray's hand snaked around his back, grabbed his ass, kneading it with his long fingers as Ben felt Ray's cock, rock hard against his belly. Breaking the kiss with regret, Ben broke away.

"So, how do I taste?" Ray asked, grinning.

"Well Ray, my...investigation, isn't quite complete. I think I need to...explore further." He motioned for Ray sit on the edge of the pool, taking an appreciative look at his full, hard penis.

"Explore away, Benny, don't mind me." He said, leaning back on his arms. Stepping between Ray's thighs he sampled his chest, nipped at his nipples, his mouth trailing down his body, finally lapping up the pre-cum at the tip of his cock, savoring it, before taking the head into his mouth. He sucked slightly, stroking his tongue across the cleft under the head.

"Oh, sweet Jesus, mother of god..." Ray moaned.

Ben stopped and looked at him.

"Would you prefer I go slowly or..."

"Christ, I don't care, just keep doin' it... Please, Benny, I'm dyin' here." His eyes were dark, breath ragged as he pleaded.

Ben nodded as he took Ray into his mouth again, picking up where he left off, deepening his descent with each stroke. Ray balanced himself on one arm, threading his free hand in Ben's hair, not pushing, just to maintain contact. Ben soon discovered that he was unable to take in the full length, inexperienced at this as he was, so he wrapped a hand around the base of the shaft, moving it in conjunction with his mouth.

"Jesus, Benny, what the ::fuck:: are you doing with your tongue...oh god!"

Ben was grateful for the monologue, unable to concentrate on his partner's face as he worked. Unsheathing his teeth, he gently dragged them up the shaft, careful not to nick the sensitive head, laving it with his tongue. Ray shuddered, fingers tightening on his scalp. Ben loved the feel of Ray's cock in his mouth, pushing at his throat, the skin so silky and smooth, the way the head pulsed against the roof of his mouth as he stroked it with his tongue.

"Oh god, yes...just like that, oh yeah..."

Ben remembered what Ray had done to him and brought his left hand between Ray's legs, spreading them wider. Finding the lightly furred testicles, he stroked them a couple of times before lifting them and stroking the spot behind them, while applying more suction to his cock.

"Oh Christ, Benny...Stop, stop" Ray's hand pulling at his hair.

"Ray, what's wrong?." Disappointment in his voice.

"Nuthin's wrong. I'm gonna come. I don't wanna come in your mouth" Panting, he was bringing his own hand around to finish the job, but Ben stopped him.

"I thought that was the point, Ray. Please."

"You actually want me to come in your mouth?" Ray asked incredulously. No woman he'd known had ever allowed that. Ben's answer was an eager nod, eyebrows raised, excitement plainly evident.

"If you're sure..." but his qualification was cut off by his gasp as Ben resumed sucking and stroking, lavishing all his attention on his cock. Tonguing the head, his left hand continued it's insistent massage behind Ray's balls. He looked up at Ray, blue eyes meeting green and the sight of his cock sliding in and out of Ben's mouth sent him over the edge.

"Oh, Jesus fucking Christ...ooooohhhh, ::fuck::"

He felt Ray's balls lift and tighten, then a warm jet struck his throat. Closing it off to avoid choking, he held his breath, as his partner's cock throbbed against the roof of his mouth. He continued rubbing his tongue under the head until Ray begged him to stop, then pulled away, swallowing and catching his breath.

Ray, struggling for breath, watched him through slitted eyes. Ben gathered him into his arms, close to his heart and eased Ray back down into the water, wanting, needing to kiss him, but hesitant, not knowing if it would be welcome, considering what he'd just done. As if he understood the need, Ray nuzzled Ben's neck with his long nose, his tongue lapping at the hollow above the collarbone, until Ben couldn't take it anymore and captured the roving mouth with his own. Tentatively, he stroked the lips with his tongue. To his surprise and joy, Ray's mouth opened to his touch and suckled greedily on his tongue. Eventually Ray broke the kiss, his need for air momentarily surpassing his need for Ben.

"Jesus, Benny, where'd you learn t'do that, huh?"

"Learn to do what? Kiss?" Ben thought it a rather basic skill.

"No, give head like that"

Ben looked puzzled for a mere moment, like he was accessing some inner database.

"Ah. The fellatio. Well, I've read some extremely graphic descriptions, and combined with..." He began what Ray could only assume was a fairly lengthy explanation.

"Books Benny? Don't tell me you learned ::that:: from some book in your grandmother's library!" Was there anything this guy hadn't learned from books?

"All right." He gave Ray a smile and looked slightly chagrined.

"So you've never done that before."

"No Ray."

"Anyone ever done it to you?"

Ben arched his eyebrows and smiled, nodding.

"A man?"

"No, Ray."

"A woman." He should have known. "Victoria."

"Well, yes, among others." Now that they were intimate, Ben felt safe revealing a little more of himself.

"Others? Other than Victoria?" Ray had somehow assumed that she'd been his first, considering Ben's attraction to her.

"Not many. A few." A very few, he thought to himself, remembering fondly the woman who'd answered his questions with her body.

They sat for a moment, looking at each other, neither entirely sure of what they'd just shared.

"Have you ever...?" he sounded uneasy, vulnerable somehow and wouldn't meet Ray's eyes.

"With a man, you mean? No, Benny." He searched for Ben's eyes, but he wouldn't look at him.

Ben nodded in confirmation of his own suspicion. He knew that Ray would be horrified, ashamed of what they'd done, after they left this room.

"I'm sorry Ray." He offered quietly.

Ray's eyes opened fully and he sat up a bit straighter. He wouldn't let his friend shoulder the sole responsibility here.

"For what Benny? For makin' me feel better than I have in months? Years maybe?" He reached out, finding Ben's hand under the water, squeezing it.

"Are you sure? What about...later?"

"How 'bout we worry about it then, when the time comes?" He slid into Ben's lap, water supporting much of his weight, straddling him, face to face.

Ben's hands reached around and stroked Ray's bottom, smooth and hard, while Ray kissed his face, eyes, ears, anything he could reach. After what seemed like a small eternity, Ray's mouth finally settled on his, Ben drawing Ray's tongue in his mouth, sucking and stroking it with his own. His hands were busy as well, having found the ring of muscle at Ray's center, tightening even further at his touch. Gently stroking, making no attempt to breach him, Ben was rewarded by a low moans uttered into his mouth. Slowing, then stopping his attentions, Ben asked softly:

"Ray. Ray."

Ray's eyes were huge.

"Yeah Benny?" His voice a low rumble, almost inaudible.

"Would you come back to my apartment with me?" Ben asked, voice like velvet. >>
Ray pulled back, seeking his eyes. Saw need, love and fear reflected in their blue depths. He'd always thought Benny's eyes expressive, but they'd always reminded Ray of glacial ice, passion imprisoned in their depths. Now they burned with a flame that might immolate them both with its intensity.
He couldn't have refused even if he'd wanted to. "Sure, I'd like that."

He got up and pulled himself out of the tub. Ben stood as well, shaking himself a bit, while Ray dripped his way to the towels. He used one on himself, then took two to Fraser, now out of the water as well. He draped one over Ben's head, scrubbing at the short thick hair. When Ben's hands rose to complete the job, Ray gently wiped the moisture from the porcelain skin, stealing kisses along the way. He couldn't get enough of Benny, wanting to crawl inside his body for about a month.

Ben finally halted his ministrations with a caress and they parted and dressed, buttoning their coats against the bitter Chicago cold.

The Rive came to life with a twist of the key.

As he pulled into traffic, Ray said, "We gotta make a stop on the way."

"Ray, are you sure?" Ben asked quietly

"Yes I'm sure, we need...stuff."

"Understood. But what I'm asking is, do you want this?" he paused, drew a breath, "Do you want me?"

"Jesus, Benny, yeah, I want you and the sooner, the better." Ray replied heatedly but keeping his eyes on the road.

"Ray, I don't want to pry, but do you have any experience with...this?" He hoped that at least one of them did.

"One thing, kinda close. Ange and I, well, we weren't doin' too good, but we were tryin' to work it out, ya know? Anyway, she goes to this party with some of her girlfriends, comes home with, uh, these little beads on a string, right? So the next weekend we're foolin' around and she sticks these beads up my ass. I was a little curious, ya know? I mean what the hell, we're married, right? Anyway, later on, we're goin' at it and just when I start to come, she starts pullin' those beads outta my ass. Christ Benny, old Mrs. Antonelli, our next door neighbor almost called the cops, I was screamin' so loud."

"Really?" Ben was grinning at the thought of making Ray scream like that.

"Jesus, I couldn't move for an hour, I swear. Ange went around with a shit-eatin' grin for a week."

"What about Mrs. Antonelli?" Ben couldn't resist.

"Ange told her I was movin' the bed and dropped it on my foot."

"Aahh, I'll have to remember that."

Ray parked in front of a drug store and ran in while Ben waited in the car. When he emerged a few minutes later, he carried a small bag. Getting in, he handed it to Fraser and drove to the apartment as quickly as he could, the need to touch him growing by the minute. Ben opened the bag and looked inside, knowing full well what he would find. Anticipation and no small amount of trepidation coiled in his stomach. They managed to get up the stairs, close and lock the door before coming together and wrestling off their clothes, throwing them in a heap on the floor. Seeing the two men together, Deifenbaker whined and sought out a safe corner from which to watch the festivities. The last time The Man had smelled like this, he'd been shot and almost killed.

Ray and Ben, free of their clothing, explored each other with abandon. At first Ben laid over Ray, their cocks sliding together as Ben licked and nipped Ray's neck and shoulders, the man writhing beneath him. Growing impatient, Ray flipped them over and held Ben's arms over his head as he stroked his hand down Ben's chest, over the rise of his ribs, until he held Ben's cock in his hand. He gave it a long squeezing stroke and Ben's moan made him release his hands and put it to his mouth. He tentatively stroked it with his tongue, tasting the moisture weeping from the head, finding it pleasant and craving more. Ray took it into his mouth, closing his lips around it, sucking gently and slid it in and out of his mouth experimentally.

"Oh god...Ray..." Ben gasped tightly.

Ray had decided for both of them that Ben would do him first. He knew he didn't have the patience to take it slow this first time and he couldn't bear the thought of hurting him. He knew that Ben would be gentle, that'd he have to talk Benny through it, but the idea excited him. He wasn't so sure that Ben would tell him if he was hurting, so the decision was made. His goal was to get Ben so hot and horny that he wouldn't question Ray's decision.

Ray felt Ben's cock swell in his mouth and took it deeper, closing his teeth on the shaft, squeezing gently, feeling the blood rush between his teeth. His own cock jumped in response, Ben's hand closed over it and he moaned into the flesh in his mouth. Ben arched his hips up, seeking more of Ray, gasping, his face radiant. Ray slowed his movements, wanting to draw this out. Once they got started, it would be over far too soon. Ray pulled away from his cock, lapping at the head a couple of times for good measure.

Ben reached over the side of the bed, extracted the bag from his jacket pocket and found the tube of lubricant. Rolling Ray onto his side, he slid down his body, until his mouth found Ray's cock once again. Starting slowly, he took in only the head as he applied lubricant to his fingers, then sliding the side of his hand down Ray's cleft, found the hard knot he sought. The cock slid in and out of his mouth, while his fingers kept the same cadence across Ray's anus, gently rubbing at first, until he felt it relax. He tongued the underside of Ray's cock as he carefully worked his finger into the hot orifice. Ben probed until he found the small gland behind the front wall and massaged it, holding back with his mouth momentarily.

"Fuck! Oh, god Benny, I want you so bad!" He was torn between wanting to impale himself on Ben's finger and thrusting into his mouth.

"Not yet." Ben carefully enunciated around the cock in his mouth, adding a second finger to the first, starting a slow thrusting motion with his hand.

Ray moaned and pushed back on the fingers tormenting him, then cried out as Ben engulfed the head of his cock. Ben finally folded a third finger into the other two and pushed into Ray again. A fine sheen of sweat broke out over Ray's body as he tried to choose between two pleasures. Ben's fingers twitching inside him were a promise of things to come, while his mouth was sending waves of fire through his veins.

"Jesus, Benny, fuck me. Please." Ray panted, his voice high with unreleased tension.

"I'm not sure that..." Ben asked, letting Ray's cock fall from his mouth.

"Just do it, for god's sake! Come on." Ray reached out and found the condoms, tearing one open then reached behind him for the lube. Putting a drop in the tip, he urged Ben forward and rolled it on, then drew himself up on his knees. As much as Ben wanted this, dreamed about it even, if he was honest with himself, he held back, suddenly afraid. What he was about to do would almost certainly hurt Ray, even if only momentarily. He reached out and stroked the soft skin presented to him, so inviting and trusting. So perfect.

"Come on, Benny, please. I want you inside me. Now." He pushed back towards Ben, who applied lube to the condom, stroking himself in the process, then applied a bit more to Ray.

Using one hand to guide him and the other on Ray's hip, he pressed the head of his cock against the hot, tight muscle. Ray pushed back hard, wanting Ben inside him regardless of his own discomfort.

"Steady, Ray." Ben admonished, wanting to make this as easy as possible.

"Fuck that! Come on, push." He growled.

Smiling a little at Ray's impatience, Ben did push, the head of his cock now inside, while Ray let out a high-pitched cry.

"Ray! I'm sorry, are you all right?" Ben asked quickly, though he didn't withdraw, waiting for Ray's body to accept him. He was almost overwhelmed by the feel of the body grasping his, hot and tight, and gave voice to a whimper.

"I'm fine...fine Benny." Ray panted, beads of sweat standing out on his back and shoulders. "More, give me more."

Gathering what little control remained to him, Ben slowly worked his cock deeper until Ray had taken his full length.

"Oh, Ray...god, you're so tight." Ben moaned, rocking gently as he looked down, seeing himself wedged to the hilt in Ray.

"Christ, you feel so good, Benny. Come on, stroke me." Ray told him, his voice tight and strangled.

Feeling him relax a bit, Ben drew out, then pushed again and Ray moaned appreciatively. Fighting hard to keep the pace slow, not wanting to hurt Ray, he slowly stroked in and out a couple of times before leaning over and resting his weight on Ray's back.

"Am I too heavy?" Ben breathed into his ear as his hand reached around and caressed Ray's straining cock.

"God no, come on Ben, do it, let go."

Ben continued to stroke Ray's cock as he began to plunge deeply into him, his control slipping. It took only a few strong, deep thrusts before Ray cried out long and loud, semen coating Ben's hand, Ray gripping his cock tightly. Ben whimpered again, loudly, before drawing back, then driving into Ray twice before coming himself, his own cries echoing around the walls of the room. When he finally recovered himself, Ben rolled them over onto their sides, still buried deeply and wrapped his arms around Ray's body, slick with sweat and come.

"Oh Ray, Ray, Ray. Are you all right?" Ben mumbled softly, exhausted and spent.

"Yeah Benny, I'm great. Hope your neighbors don't call the cops, though." Ray chuckled a little and Ben felt it reverberate through his still sensitive cock. Putting his hands between them he withdrew and disposed of the condom, wanting nothing between them as they recovered. >> For a long while, they lay quietly, Ray held safe within Ben's arms, his large callused hands absently stroking his cooling skin. It had been so long, years perhaps, since Ray felt so safe and secure. Ben's breath whispered past his ear, its steady cadence suggesting that he'd dropped off. He'd always been the one to do that, he smiled to himself and didn't begrudge Ben the luxury, his own eyes sliding closed.

Some time later, Ray awoke, alone and chilled. He sat up quickly, alarmed, but before full panic could set in, the door opened and Ben slipped in, clad in sweatpants and t-shirt, his skin still glowing and damp from a recent scrubbing. Noticing Ray's concerned look:

"Sorry Ray, I didn't want to wake you."

"S'okay, Benny. When you weren't here, I uh... I think I should clean up." Ray indicated his less than pristine state.

"Let me get you something to wear." Ben rummaged in a drawer of an ancient dresser, coming up with another pair of sweatpants and a RCMP t-shirt and handing them to Ray, along with a clean towel.

Not wanting to contaminate the clean clothes, Ray donned only the sweatpants, keeping them low on his hips. Ben had watched him dress from his position by the dresser looking sleepy, disheveled and completely irresistible. Ray walked over to him, reaching out to stroke Ben's face.

"You're so beautiful, anyone ever tell you that?" Ray told him, something close to awe in his voice.

"No, Ray," Ben replied, dropping his eyes self-consciously.

"Well you are. The most beautiful man I've ever seen." Ray leaned over, gently brushing Ben's lips with his own, not demanding or intrusive, but merely caressing.

"Thank you" was all Ben could say as Ray stepped back and left the apartment.

Ben busied himself with hanging up Ray's suit and picking up his own discarded clothing. He moved slowly, almost leisurely around the apartment while waiting for Ray to return. Deifenbaker approached him and Ben sat down on the bed and scratched the wolf behind the ears. Deif vocalized his pleasure, the sound somewhere between a whine and a moan and ended on a questioning note.

"Yes, well, I'm aware that it's a rather unconventional choice, but I believe it's quite a sound one." Ben explained to his friend.

The wolf groaned.

"I wouldn't be so sure of that. If you don't stop stealing food from him, he just might consider shooting you." Then added quickly, "Of course I'm kidding. Ray likes you... No, really, he does." Ray appeared as if summoned by their conversation, scrubbing at his head with the towel.

"Ya gotta move someplace that has a shower, Benny, a tub just isn't the same." Ray said, then noticed Ben sitting on the bed with Deif at his feet.

"Is he okay? He's not upset is he?" he asked, unsure of how to deal with a jealous wolf.

"Oh, no, I was just telling him that you're fond of him." Ben explained, "It might help if you told him yourself, Ray."

If someone had told Ray that during the course of this evening, he'd have mind-blowing sex with his best friend, not once, but twice, only to end up reassuring an insecure wolf, he'd have taken him directly to the closest hospital for a psychiatric hold.

"Yes, Deif, I like you fine. I like you best when you're not stealing from me. Okay?" He looked from Ben to the wolf and back again.

Deif walked over the braided rug and lay down, a soft moan escaping him as he made himself comfortable.

"Apparently so." Ben observed, then searched out Ray's eyes. "Will you come to bed, Ray?"

"Yeah Benny." Ray pulled the shirt over his head, then took Ben's hand, urging him to stand.

They stripped each other's clothes off again, slowly this time, tenderly. Ray got into bed first, followed by Ben, who shut off the light next to the bed. For a few moments they just lay there, side-by-side, neither of them used to sleeping with another.

Ben broke the awkward silence. "Could I...hold you, Ray?"

"Yeah, I'd like that." Ray turned towards Ben, as Ben turned to him.

They lay there for a moment, face-to-face, breathing each other's breath, unable to find a comfortable place for their arms. Ray tried to slide down so he could tuck his head under Ben's chin, but his feet hung off the end of the bed, while Ben's head bumped the wall.

"Um, perhaps if you turn your back to me." Ben suggested.

"Oh, okay." Ray rolled over, followed by a considerable amount of flailing about as they readjusted the blankets. When they finally came to rest, Ben's left arm was draped over Ray's chest, their legs entwining as they molded to each other's bodies. Releasing tandem sighs, a few minor adjustments were made.

"Ray, are you comfortable?"

"Yeah, I am, actually." Slightly surprised to find himself relaxing into the warm body behind him.

Ray closed his eyes and tried to sleep, but as content and comfortable as he was, he couldn't quite drop off. He thought of something Ben had alluded to at the bathhouse

"Benny?"

"Yes, Ray." He answered the voice in the dark, close to his ear.

"Who was your first? I know it's kinda personal, but..." Ray couldn't explain why he wanted to know, but he did. It did seem like essential information for lovers to share.

"My first? I'm not sure I understand"

"First woman you slept with, Benny."

"Ahhh. Her name was Sharon." Ben answered, his voice softening on her name.

"Yeah...and?" Ray needed to know all about it, but oddly, he didn't feel jealous, just an overwhelming need for Benny to share this with him.

"And, I was 19, taking my training at the Depot. She was a college student at the University. I had, uh, taken quite a bit of ribbing over the fact that I hadn't known a woman...in that way, and I...decided, that, well, it was time for me to gain that experience. I wasn't entirely sure how I should go about finding someone...appropriate, but in the end, she found me. Anyway, she took me back to her apartment and over the course of the evening, she, uh, initiated me." Ben stopped, knowing Ray would want more detail.

"How'd it go?" He prodded.

"I was very fortunate. I soon confessed that I wasn't...experienced, but she was patient and kind. She showed me the kind of touch women enjoy, how to kiss and caress. Let me explore her body and taught me how to relax and enjoy the pleasure she gave me"

"She did all that in one night?"

"Of course not, Ray. I saw her for several months." Ben explained.

"Did you love her, Benny?"

"In a way, yes. But more out of gratitude for what she'd given me. It wasn't until later that I discovered how skilled she really was."

"Skilled? Really?"

"Yes. Her oral technique was incomparable. I admit that I used those same techniques on you. I'm happy I was able to...please you so well." Ben finished.

"Oh yeah. You got real talent there." Ray observed.

A long silence stretched out between the new lovers.

"Irene was my first." Ray finally offered.

"Irene Zuko?" Ben was surprised.

"Yeah. It was our secret and I've never told anyone, not even my priest, until now." His voice was quiet, haunted.

"Her old man was a brutal son of a bitch. He'd smacked her around for seein' me before, but she wouldn't let him stop her. She was afraid he was gonna marry her off to some goon and told me that she wanted to know what real love was like before that happened." Ray's voice was soft and sad as he continued.

"She didn't want to lose her virginity to a man like her father. We were 16 when we planned it. Her folks were outta town and there were only a coupla guys around the house and when it was late, I climbed up that vine outside her window. She had these curtains all around her bed, like a tent, and when I crawled inside, Benny, it was like another planet. I'd done my part and bought a couple of condoms from the vending machine at the gas station. We both wanted it so bad, but we never figured it'd be so hard. I was 16, what did I know?"

"Hard? In what way?" Ben asked.

"I hurt her Benny, and even though she told me it was the only way, I still feel bad about it. I mean we both were just fumbling around in the dark, the blind leading the blind. I mean, I had, like, no control, I felt like an animal, and when it was over, we just held each other and cried."

"I'm sorry, Ray. But I do think that you gave her what she wanted. She wanted to give that gift to someone who would cherish it, as you have."

"You ever take someone's virginity, Benny?" Ray asked, his voice still full of remorse.

"Only yours, Ray." Ben whispered into his ear, followed by a feather light kiss.

Ray was about to protest, then understood Ben's meaning.

"I hadn't thought about it, but I guess you're right. Thanks, Benny."

"For what? I believe I should be the one thanking you."

"No, I never thought it could be like that, you know? God, I still can't believe how you make me feel."

"I know what you mean, Ray, I feel the same way." Ben's voice so soft he wouldn't have heard it if the words hadn't been spoken into his ear, followed by what felt like the flick of a tongue.

Ben woke to the sensation of Ray's cock pressed tightly against his rear, an arm thrown over to trail over his chest. It was a warm, welcome feeling. In his solitary existence he'd rarely been awakened by a lover. Flexing his back, Ben rubbed against the hard length and was rewarded with a sleepy moan from his partner. Ray's hand now trailed down his belly, fingers waltzing through the dense patch of pubic hair, before tickling the shaft of Ben's hardening penis. The heated flesh jumped in response, seeking the source of the sensation while Ben released a loud moan. Ray smiled into the skin against his cheek, then trailed his tongue up and down his spine as Ben shuddered, gasping his pleasure.

"Ray, please...I want you inside me." His voice low, rough with need.

"Easy, Benny. Let's take it slow and easy." Ray whispered with relief.

He wanted to make this good for Ben. He had to take his time and hoped that he'd be able to make it as easy as possible for him. He looked around for the things he'd need, then moved away from Ben, pulling him onto his back, then flipped the blankets away. Ray gazed longingly at the long hard length, a large crystalline drop gracing the head. He had to swallow hard, his hand drifting to his own flesh, squeezing it to quiet the insistent throbbing. Ben watched Ray's beautiful cock swell at the sight of his own and his arousal climbed higher. Ray touched his finger to the fluid, then took his finger into his mouth, eyes closing as he tasted Ben's essence, then touched him once again. Ray played with the foreskin, lubricating it with more of the precious fluid, sliding it around the engorged cocked, while Ben whimpered in appreciation.

"God! Ray, that feels so good, oh, yes,"

"You like that, huh? How about this?" Ray asked as he bent and tongued the slit, then sucked the head into his mouth.

"Aah. Oh my! Yes!" His back arched as he pushed towards Ray's mouth.

Ray took his mouth away, then gathered the extra pillows and blankets, rolling them up. He had to watch Benny's face as he made love to him, had to see his responses to better gauge his own. He cued Ben to lift his hips off the bed and shoved the rolled up bedding under them, then got back to work. Taking Ben into his mouth again, he stroked his tongue on the underside, fingers fondling Ben's balls and the tender spot behind them. Ben sighed and moaned, drawing his legs up, allowing Ray free access. Replacing his mouth with a hand, Ray began to lick his testicles, taking first one, then the other gently into his mouth, laving them with his tongue, then moving on to lick that special spot, probing at it, while Ben trembled under his touch. Ray didn't stroke Ben's cock, but squeezed it in time with his tongue-strokes.

Moving into unknown territory, Ray pulled back a moment to orient himself. His eyes found Ben's dusky opening and taking a deep breath, dropped his head and tentatively reached out with his tongue. Ben cried out in surprise and his body tightened in response, but Ray continued his journey, his tongue stroking all around the knot of muscle. Ben began to relax and Ray slowly stroked his cock, his thumb drawing circles around the swollen head.

Ray pulled away for a moment, found the lubricant and applied a small amount to his fingers, then bent and took Ben's cock into his mouth again. He loved the feel of the cock in his mouth, the foreskin retreating before his lips, the taste of Ben on his tongue.

"Oh Ray, please, please," the sound of Ben pleading with him almost caused Ray to rush, but he took his mouth away just long enough to reply.

"Easy, Benny, all in good time, I promise."

Ray returned Ben's cock to his mouth, slowly sucking and tonguing while he found Ben's center with his hand, stroking across it with his slick finger. Soon, Ben was moving against his finger and Ray gently worked it inside the tight passage.

"Ray! Oh, god, Ray." His voice tight, pitched higher with tension.

Taking it as a positive sign, Ray moved his finger inside Ben, crooking it forward to find his prostate as his mouth kept cadence on his cock.

"Ooh, that feels good, so very good." Ben groaned before lapsing into wordless moans.

Ben was so tight, Ray was somewhat reluctant to try two fingers, but making sure of the lubrication, he pushed his fingers inside, this time Ben actively pressing against them. Ray looked up at Ben's face, his brows furrowed with concentration as he arched up into Ray's mouth, then down onto his fingers, panting slightly with the effort. Ray's balls ached with need at the realization that Ben was fucking himself on his hand, in his mouth. Ray had to pull away to pant.

"Benny, god, you're incredible, you know that?" Ray's cock bobbed for attention and he stroked it, oh so tempted to try to gain entry already.

"Ray, I need you Ray. I need you now." Ben told him, sounding almost commanding.

"Not yet, Benny, soon. Real soon 'cos I can't take it much more."

Ray made sure a condom was nearby and used a bit more lubricant on his fingers before gradually working three of them into Ben. He watched with fascination the way Ben's body accepted his with apparently little discomfort. He stopped moving his hand and desire ripped through him like a whirlwind at the sight of Ben stroking himself on his fingers.

"Jesus, Benny, I got to have you." Ray gasped, looking down at his own weeping cock, a ribbon of pre-come dripping down his thigh.

"Take me Ray. Now. Take me, make me yours." Ben panted, reaching down to stroke his cock.

Ray ripped the condom packet open with his teeth and put it on, then added some additional lube. Ben made to roll over, but Ray stopped him with a hand on his hip.

"No, stay there, Benny, I got to see you."

Ben settled back down to the heap of bedding and drew his feet up. Ray moved into position, guiding Ben's knees closer to his chest. Ben reached up to hold them, finally understanding Ray's intention. Ray tried to steady his trembling hands as he positioned the head of his cock against Ben's center. Blue eyes locked with green and Ray pushed, but didn't gain entry. Pain registered momentarily on Ben's face, but passed quickly. Even so, Ray wondered if he should continue.

"Again." Ben breathed, as he concentrated on relaxing, pushing down against Ray just a bit.

Ray took a deep breath and pushed, harder this time as a strangled cry escaped Ben. The head of his cock had penetrated the tight ring of muscle. Ben had an unfocused look in his eyes and Ray saw that his erection had flagged considerably.

"Benny, stay with me, carol, please," like Ben, the night before, he didn't withdraw, but held stationary, his cock steadily pulsing with his heartbeat. At the sound of Ray's voice, Ben refocused and smiled at Ray.

"Oh, Ray, I'm with you...like never before." He whispered and Ray felt him relax around him.

"Benny... you feel...so good." Ray panted as he began a rocking motion, steadily deepening his thrusts until Ben had taken his entire length.

Ray pulled Ben's knees forward until his feet were back on the bed, then took Ben's cock in his hands again, stroking the head and shaft with practiced hands. As it regained its former stiffness, Ben began to push against him, seeking more stimulation.

"Please Ray, more... I need more." Ray had never seen him like this. Hard and soft at the same time, pleading for contact.

"Whatever you want..."

Ray tried to move in and out of Ben while stroking his cock at the same time, but just couldn't maintain the right rhythm.

"Here, let me." Ben said as he replaced Ray's hand with his own.

Ray thought he was in some erotic version of heaven. He was able to concentrate on the way Ben's body had accepted his, the feel of Ben's muscles as they contracted around his cock as he pleasured himself. Watching Ben's hands on his cock, he was able to detach himself a bit, maintaining a little more control. Ray pulled out enough that the head of his cock would rub against Ben's prostate and his response was electric.

"Oh, god, Ray!" Ben cried out as he arched his back to maximize the contact, his hand stroking his cock faster now.

Ray paused a moment to apply some lube to Ben's cock and Ben smoothed it over, moaning in appreciation as Ray resumed his thrusts. Ben pumped his cock steadily as Ray moved inside him, his own urgency growing.

"Oh yeah, Benny. Fuck... you feel so good, so tight."

Ray's words urged Ben to new heights, his head thrown back, hips angled to accommodate Ray's strokes. Ben's hands worked his cock, one on the shaft, the other sliding over the glistening head, his voice growing hoarse with his cries.

Ray grabbed Ben's hips and pumped into him as quickly as he dared, pushing Ben over the edge. Ben let loose a howl and Ray was rewarded with the sight of Ben's come shooting from his cock in long steady streams. The feel of Ben's body spasming around his, clasping him, made Ray want to thrust hard and deep, but he wanted Ben to see him, know him.

"Benny, oh...Fuck, I need to, I gotta..." Ray gasped, hoping Ben understood what he meant.

"Let go Ray, let it go." He heard Ben say.

He hadn't realized that his eyes had shut in concentration and bliss, but it didn't matter now. Ray finally gave in to his instincts and thrust deeply into Ben, once, twice and he felt Ben tighten around him again.

Ben watched Ray abandon all reason, enjoying the aftershocks created by Ray's deep penetration. Ben consciously tightened his pelvic muscles, intensifying his own sensations as much as it triggered Ray's explosive release.

"Ahh! Benny..." the rest unintelligible as Ray's entire body shuddered in orgasm and Ben felt its pulse at the point where they were joined.

Ray collapsed over Ben, sweaty and depleted. Ben felt energized and exhausted at the same time, his limbs reluctant to obey his commands yet twitching occasionally with aftershocks. Eventually they managed to disengage and rearrange the blankets, Ray wrapping himself around the larger man's body.

"Benny, you okay?"

"Yes, Ray. I'm fine," he answered in an unsteady voice, wanting to say more, offer words of appreciation perhaps, but unable to make any sense of his scattered thoughts.

Ben felt as if the world had shifted, just a bit. Some things that had been crystal clear to him were now a little blurry and others had been brought into sharp focus. A puzzle piece had finally snapped into place. He would have liked to explain it to Ray, but the words simply wouldn't come, his head filled instead with abstract fragments. He realized that his breath was hitching in his chest and wasn't terribly surprised to find that he was crying.

Ray held the shuddering body tightly, fighting tears himself. He'd fucked up. He wasn't sure exactly how, but somehow, somewhere he had. The single most moving experience he'd ever had and it had come from abusing his best friend. He tentatively reached down and checked Ben for blood, but his hand came back untainted.

"Jesus, Benny, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry...," Ray's voice cracked with emotion

Ben was startled out of his own self-examination by Ray's apology.

"No, Ray, there's nothing to be sorry for. I, I, I don't know how..." Ben took an uneven breath, trying to pull himself together enough to make some kind of explanation.

"I pushed you into this, I know I did. God, I'm sorry." Ray didn't even seem to hear him, lost in his own self-recrimination.

Ben turned over until he faced Ray, his eyes almost emerald with unshed tears.

"Ray. Ray. Look at me Ray, please." He asked.

Ray reluctantly met the bottomless blue of Benny's eyes, found no fear or sadness there.

"Ray, I don't know how to describe how you made, make, me feel. I don't have...anything to compare it to. What I feel is so powerful it's, it's, well, it's overwhelming." Ben stopped, sucked in a deep breath.

Ray was somewhat relieved, but still didn't understand quite what was going on.

"Yeah, I know what you mean." Well, he did and he didn't.

He tried to remember exactly how he felt after Benny had made love to him. It all was rather blurry.

Ben tried again to explain.

"Ray, I've never experienced anything remotely as intense as, as...you, inside me. I was helpless Ray. In those moments, Ray, I was completely under your control." Ben tried again, breathing more evenly now, his scattered thoughts regrouping again.

"Oh? Really? Is that a good thing?" Ray asked, hoping for his own sake that it was.

"Yes, Ray." Ben tenderly kissed him, then continued, "I'm not accustomed to...not being in control. It's a very hard thing for me to relinquish it to anyone - even you. But once I did, have...Ray, it was...indescribable."

Ray took a moment to think about Ben's words, absorbing them, a smile dawning on his lips. He'd rocked Benny's world. He'd actually done it and Ben had allowed him to. He showered Benny's face with tiny angel kisses.

"I'm glad, Benny, I really am."