It seems to me that there are two schools of thought concerning Diefenbaker. This story is just to show everyone where I stand on the issue.

These boys don't belong to me (I should be so lucky!) I am just borrowing them for a little harmless fun.

Rated G

SUNDAY IN THE PARK WITH DIEF

It was a beautiful spring day in Chicago, and Benton Fraser and Ray Vecchio were taking full advantage of it.

They had taken Ben's wolf Diefenbaker to one of the local parks for a walk, and all three were enjoying the fresh air and exercise.

Ben and Ray were sharing a bag of popcorn, and Ray was also sharing with Diefenbaker. He would toss a few pieces to the wolf, who would happily devour them, then run off to explore the nearby trees, grass and flowers before returning for popcorn.

Fraser had thought about objecting to the illicit snack feedings, but reconsidered. Dief should be able to enjoy the day, too. And as long as it wasn't chocolate, Ben figured he was one step ahead of the game.

The trio rounded a corner. Up ahead was the duck pond. Diefenbaker ran towards it full speed, barking happily. He stopped at the water's edge, barking and growling at the ducks.

Unfortunately, the groundskeeper was nearby.

"Hey, get away from those ducks!" the man yelled.

Dief looked up at him.

"Go away!!"

The wolf obediently turned around and trotted back over to Ben and Ray. Ben looked directly at Diefenbaker.

"We have discussed this before. You are to leave those ducks alone."

Dief whined and looked away. Fraser bent and turned Diefenbaker's head so that the wolf was looking directly at his master.

"Diefenbaker! Do not bother the ducks! Or next time I will put you on a leash."

Dief whimpered, but he gave a meek little wag of his tail and started walking back down the path at a more sedate pace.

Ray had watched the entire exchange in exasperation. He had been wanting to mention something to Benny for a few months, and now seemed as good a time as any. 'Best to just plunge right in.' he told himself.

"Uh, Fraser?"

"Yes, Ray?"

"Um... it's about Diefenbaker. Benny... your wolf isn't deaf."

Fraser looked at Ray in much the same manner one would look at a backward three year old.

"Well of course he's not deaf, Ray. I know that."

Ray stared at him in open-mouthed surprise. He didn't know exactly what kind of reaction he had expected from Benny, but this one was not even on the list.

"Excuse me?"

"Well, Ray, I'm not stupid, you know."

"I didn't think you were, Fraser." Ray thought for a minute.

"How long have you known about this?" he asked.

"Oh, a few years."

"A few *years*?"

"Yes, Ray."

For quite possibly the first time in his life, Ray Vecchio was rendered speechless. He sat down heavily on the nearest park bench.

"Ray?" Fraser looked a little worried.

Ray, meanwhile, was trying to put together a coherent sentence. He was trying to put together a coherent thought, for that matter.

"What.... but...." Finally, he got out an entire question.

"Was he *ever* deaf?"

"Oh, yes." Fraser answered cheerfully. "I think he really was for a little while. But I now think that it was due to the water pressure in his ears."

"But you told me that his ear drums had ruptured."

"Well, yes. That's what the Veterinarian told me."

"How could a Vet be wrong about something like that?" Ray asked.

"I'm not entirely sure, Ray. Maybe he was confused. Maybe he was just having an off day. Or it could be that he wasn't used to working on smaller animals. He did deal mostly with Caribou."

Ray had been staring incredulously at Fraser while he spoke; he now buried his face in his hands and shook his head. He was mumbling something to himself. Fraser couldn't quite make out what it was; but it sounded like a prayer.

"Ray, are you all right?"

Ray looked up at Ben. He opened his mouth, closed it again, and then finally spoke.

"So Dief doesn't know that you know?"

"Oh, of course not." Fraser answered, clearly stunned that Ray would even ask.

Ray thought to himself 'this is the most bizarre conversation I have ever had in my entire life.' He couldn't believe that he was actually going to ask the next question.

"Why haven't you ever told him?"

"Well now Ray, I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings."

Ray said something in Italian.

"Ray, did you just swear?"

Ray repeated the word. Twice.

"Ray!"

"OK, Benny, let me see if I have this straight: You haven't told your deaf wolf that you know that he can hear because you don't want to hurt his *feelings*?"

"Yes, Ray." Fraser replied, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

Ben sat down next to Ray on the park bench. Ray just looked at him.

"You were right before, Benny. You're not stupid. You're insane!!"

"Ray, Ray, Ray... think about it. It's perfectly harmless. Dief gets a little extra attention and sympathy, and he thinks he's pulling one over on me. What is it hurting? And he did save my life. Numerous times. I owe him at least that much, don't you think?"

Ray stared at Ben for a long minute, and then he smiled.

Suddenly, Ray was horrified to realize that everything Fraser had said made perfect sense to him.

"Oh my God!!" Ray jumped up from the bench as if stung.

"Ray?"

Ray took the bag of popcorn away from Fraser.

"Come on, we're leaving."

"All right, Ray."

Vecchio tossed the bag of popcorn into a trash can as they passed by.

"Don't you want to finish the popcorn, Ray?"

"I'm going to need something a hell of a lot stronger than popcorn."

"Ray!" Fraser exclaimed, looking at his watch. "It's only 11:00! You don't mean..."

"Yes, I do mean. Come on, Benny. We're going to Baskin Robbins"

THE END