Suitable Punishment

=========================================
A Post "Ballads, Chocolate & Parachutes" adventure
with our two intrepid hero's happily married and living
together.
Enjoy
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Margaret Thatcher watched Fraser wince and hold the
phone away from his ear.
"Dead, dead, dead, do you hear me, Mister?"
The phone went back to Fraser's ear.
"Yes, Ray. I'm corpus delecti."
"Don't go sweet talking me."
"I'm sorry about the coat."
"You will be."
Fraser sat down the phone.
"Trouble in paradise I take it."
"My coat, "Fraser tweaked a red serge sleeve "and
Ray's formerly white coat were in his opinion far too
intimately aquatinted while they were soaking wet after that
storm we were caught in the other day."
"It's pink now, isn't it," she said her lips
twitching.
"Along with the rest of his suit, his shirt and socks.
But it's not as bad as it was.. I spent two day's bleaching
it all trying to get it out before he found out what
happened to his *brand new* suit.."
She tossed the phone book on the desk.
"What is that for."
"Look under A, for Airlines, I'm sure there's a flight
out of the country to somewhere nice and safe, like
Zimbabwe."

*)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(*

Huey looked over Ray's rather fetching pink coat. Or at
least it was fetching in Huey's opinion.
"Nice shade. But wasn't that coat white last week."
"It mated with Fraser's in the laundry."
Huey laughed.
"That's the last time I trust him with my laundry."
Dewey stared at Ray's coat when he arrived.
"It mated with Fraser's in the laundry," Huey
informed him.
"That explains it."
Ray's seat went out and he put his legs up on the desk.
Huey started slapping the desk in laughter when he saw Ray's
trousers were a matching shade of pink. Then Ray pulled the
legs up to reveal baby pink socks.
"They had babies."
Huey pointed at Ray.
"You know it's true love when he wears it even though
it was given a colour change when his lover's washing."
"That's Spouse or Husband."
"Nah, it's Spouse or Husband when the sum total of
your relationship is sitting at the breakfast table reading
papers and saying "Coffee?" It's Lover's and Love Birds
when you're still at the billing and cooing stage."
"If he turns any more of my clothes pink, I'll be
billing him alright."
Huey and Dewey laughed.

*)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(*

Huey was walking past a storage closet when he heard
Ray's voice.
"Hey Jack."
Huey looked around to see Ray's head poking around the
door of the closet.
"Nice coat, can I borrow it."
"No."
"Pretty please."
"Forget it, you go through more suits than anyone I
know."
"Blame Fraser and give me the damn coat already."
"Why?"
"Don't make me tell Dewey you're as Gay as the day is
long, Jack."
Huey handed over the coat, out came Ray's naked arm and
snatched it. Huey crossed his arms and waited. Ray walked
out in the coat, and not much else.
"Is Fraser in that closet?"
"No. My suit disintegrated. I barely made it to this
closet in time before it fell to bits on me."
"Do they make Fraser proof suits?"
"I haven't found one yet," Ray said before scuttling
off hoping he could reach the locker room and his spare suit
without running into any ladies.
His wish was not to be granted. He bolted down the
corridors with a few bumps and bruises to shouts of
"Flasher, Pervert and Nice Legs."

*)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(*

Contrary to Ray's threats, he didn't kill Fraser, and
Fraser was dying of anticipation, waiting for Ray to take
his revenge. But Ray was sweetness and light, showing him an
invitation he'd received from the GCU.
"What is a GCU?"
"Gay Cops United. I got it with a membership form in
the mail today. And a very nice letter telling me what an
woooonderful example a nice *married* couple in the
collective would be."

"Oh.. What is the invitation to?"
"A big barbecue. Huey told me I should go. Cause
they're a lot of fun."
"Huey."
"Yeah, whaddya know he's a card carrying member. And
hoping he meets some cute cop who's single and looking at
the barbecue."
"And Dewey?"
Ray snickered.
"Dewey was all you could have told me you were
*Gay*."
"Oh."
"Then three women shrieked, he's *Gay* Waaah. Why are
all the cute ones gay?!!!"
Fraser laughed.
"Then someone said, Fraser's Gay. And they said
Exactly, then that someone said, I meant Ray. Not the
Mountie. And they said point taken."
"Well I think you're very cute," Fraser said kissing
his nose.
"You're prejudiced."
"I only married you for your looks you know."
"Oh, tell me more."
"And your body."
"Mhmm.. any particular part?"
"I love every part of your body."
Then he licked Ray's ear.
"Especially when it's covered in this."
Fraser brought the bottle of chocolate body paint he'd
brought on his way home out from behind his back. Ray's eyes
lit up.

*)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(*

Fraser thought he was off the hook, until the barbecue.
Ray snuck up behind him and smeared a little something Deif
couldn't resist on the tail of his serge coat. Deif jumped
up to bite it and Fraser spun. With a little snick the whole
coat came apart at the seams. Fraser gave a wail.
"My coat!"
Ray patted his dark serge covered rump.
"I like your white shirt."
Then he tugged and Fraser's pant's came apart. Leaving
him standing there in his shorts, the shorts Ray had brought
him the day before and kissed him into agreeing to wear that
day. They were covered in little smiley faces and have a
nice day's.
Fraser spun and with an evil little grin, Ray tweaked
on Fraser's white undershirt and it fell apart too. There
were whistles and claps. Then Ray patted the now feircely
blushing Fraser on the face.
"That's the last time you bleach one of my suits."
Then he walked off cackling "Revenge is sweet."

==============(*)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(*)============
Copyright Red Skye May 4, 1998. All the usual
disclaimers apply. The character's belong to Alliance. I was
a good girl, I didn't do anything horrible to your toys, and
I promise to put them back on the shelf nice and tidy. Minus
their clothes, but nice and tidy. :)


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