Never Again

by Morgana

Fandom: XMen

Rating: NC-17

Summary: Remy's hiding at the boathouse, trying to deal with a past that haunts him. Bobby gets fed up with Remy's attitude and tries to find out what's going on. Slowly, Bobby discovers what monster lurks in Remy's past

I love you... Why are you doing this to me? To us? Remy, come back to me. You know we are meant to be together! This is ludicrous!

Remy flinched violently, wrapped his arms around his frame and banged his head against the wall, banging hard, hoping the pain would force the voice inside his head in to submission. "Go away! Leave me alone! I don't want anything to do with you!"

He was alone at the boathouse, where he lived in exile now that the X-Men no longer wanted him around. Led by false pride he had announced he wanted to live here, that this situation would solve their problems for now, but all he had really wanted was to get away from them, to increase the distance between them.

Remy, come back to me. I will take you back and I won't hold your betrayal against you. Come back to me. I love you...

Non, stop it! Just stop it! I don't want anything to do with you! It was a lie! What we had was a lie! You used me!

No, Remy, we belong together. You can deny that, but that doesn't change the truth!

Non! Leave me alone! Desperate to rid himself of the invasive voice, he used his charging power and gathered a spark of energy in his fingertips, placing them against the inside of his wrist. He screamed out in pain as the kinetic fire burned his skin, but it silenced the voice at last.

Panting, he stared at the ugly burn on his arm and sobbed softly. It hurt... but the physical pain made the emotional one fade.

Slowly, he rose from the floor where he had collapsed and made his way over to the kitchen where he came to a halt in front of the sink. Cold water dripped down his arm, cooling the burn and taking away some of its sting. Through the tears, he stared at the ugly burn. He had to find another way to make the pain go away. Hurting himself like that was not an option!

Remy rested his head against the kitchen cupboard while cooling his arm. When had this nightmare started? When I got back from Antarctica... Antarctica had changed everything and his life would never be the same again. I don't wanna think about it, not now...

With his other hand, he pulled the first aid kit closer and sat down at the kitchen table, his arm wrapped in a clean towel. After opening the kit, he selected a soothing balm and applied some of the cool gel to the burn. His head bowed in defeat, he stared at the burn

Exhausted, he let the balm do its work and after putting some special gauze over the wound, he applied a loose bandage. It would take a few weeks for the burn to heal and it would hamper him in the mean time.

Keeping his arm close to his chest, he opened the fridge in search of some cold juice. "Merde." He was out of luck. His fridge was empty except for some salad and leftovers, nothing to drink.

This meant he had to visit the mansion, and restock. He should probably take more food supplies with him, that way he wouldn't have to visit the mansion again for some weeks. His face contorted. He really didn't want to go to the mansion and face them. Although they had never told him to leave, he had seen the distrust in their eyes. They didn't want him around. If only he were a little more courageous, then he would have left Westchester all together. Nothing kept him here and yet he felt unable to leave.

Remy grabbed some paper bags to carry his supplies home in and placed them on the kitchen table. He climbed the stairs to his bedroom and changed into jeans and a baggy, long sleeved shirt.

After gathering his paper bags, he left the boathouse and headed for the mansion, ignoring the rain that poured down on him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Happy birthday, Bobby. Happy thirtieth!"

Bobby cringed. "Please, Warren, don't remind me of my age! I don't feel that old!" Thirty. He was turning thirty today and his team mates were throwing him a surprise party. But the thing was that he didn't want a party! He had hoped no one would remember it was his birthday.

"Thirty..." Logan growled low in his throat. "Yer just a kid!"

"Compared to you perhaps!" Bobby tried to smile, but only a contorted grin surfaced on his face. Sighing, he stared at the mountain of Twinkies which Hank had given him as a birthday present. If I eat those I will easily add ten pounds! It's sugar, pure posion! Why didn't he just give me a few Twinkies? Why this mountain? The Twinkies reached the ceiling in the corridor. "Hank, I can't eat them all!"

Hank smiled smugly, removed his glasses and cleaned them, ignoring Bobby's remark. "My, isn't there any tea? I am thirsty..." Without giving Bobby another look, he marched over to the bar, where Storm was helping them to their drinks.

Looking to his right, Bobby caught Jean's amused expression. "Stop smirking! You'll help me eat those Twinkies!"

Jean giggled. "I wouldn't mind eating two or three Twinkies, Bobby. I love chocolate, but that's where I draw the line. No more than three."

Scott sat back and watched the exchange. Life was good. Bobby was turning thirty today and would hopefully stop clowning around so much, but then again, he would miss the laughter and Bobby's pranks.

Rogue, who was chatting with Joseph and Betsy, raised her glass and wished him a happy birthday as well. Bobby smiled politely. A few years ago he would have blushed a crimson red, pleased at having her attention, but he no longer had a crush on her. He had seen the way she had treated Remy and his crush had faded quickly. Rogue was a good teammate, he just didn't want her as a lover.

Warren gave him a wink and Bobby grinned in return. First, Charles had told him that he deserved a vacation and then Warren had offered to pay for it. Of course he had taken his friend up on the offer; he had always wanted to make a trip to New Zealand to simply enjoy the magnificent nature there. He would spend the next week plotting his trip and then head for New Zealand.

Although the team was his family, it felt good to get away from them for a few weeks. He couldn't remember the last time he had taken a vacation. Sipping his beer, his gaze traveled from one teammate to another, until he felt content at having his family close.

Suddenly his stomach growled, but he blatantly ignored Hank who directed him toward the Twinkies in the corridor and he headed for the kitchen instead. What he really wanted were some sandwiches, not Twinkies!

However, his smile died on his lips at finding Remy rummaging in the kitchen. Remy, he had completely forgotten about the Cajun! Well, I couldn't exactly invite him as they threw me a surprise party; I had no idea they were planning something like that! But I should have noticed he was missing, damn it!

"Hey, Remy, I missed you at the party. Would you like to have a drink with me, us? It's my thirtieth. The others are making fun of me, you can join in too." He smiled, hoping he could save his sorry ass. How on earth could he forget about Remy? "Wanna join us?"

Remy gave him a blinding smile while packing more food supplies in to his paper bags. "Would love to, Drake. I love to party, mon ami, mais I got a hot date in just one hour and I need to get ready... Can't disappoint de femme, can I?"

Bobby nodded once. "Sure, dates come first. I understand." He was a little disappointed that Remy brushed him off like that, fairly sure that the Cajun had no date. He had been stuck with monitor duty this last week and Remy hadn't left the mansion's premises once, hiding at the boathouse instead.

"Maybe I can drop off some leftover birthday cake later? That's if Logan doesn't get to it first." Damn, he wanted to make things up to Remy. The Cajun didn't show any disappointment, but Remy had to feel left out. Everyone else was partying in the living room.

"Ai, you don't have to do that, Bobby! I won't go hungry!" Remy pointed at the stuffed paper bags. "I'll probably be eating out tonight anyways!"

Bobby gave in. It was obvious that Remy didn't want his company and he wasn't pushing. "Maybe another time?"

"Oui, maybe!" Remy grinned impishly, grabbed his food supplies and marched toward the doorway. "Joyeux anniversaire, Bobby! Hope you have a bon day!"

The door closed behind Remy, and Bobby was left standing there, feeling strangely manipulated. "You always liked to party, Remy... I know you probably don't have a date tonight, you haven't left the premises for at least one week. You're simply keeping me, us, at a distance... I wonder why."

Worried, Bobby returned to the party, no longer hungry. His party mood was gone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy hurried home and because of his speed, he lost several food items, so he had to stop to collect them again. It had been easy to act carefree in front of Bobby, but now that he was alone again he had a hard time keeping the mask in place. It always slipped.

He threw the door open, dropped the paper bags on to the kitchen table and leaned forward, placing his hands against the wall. Breathing harshly, he tried to subdue the stinging sensation in his eyes.

When he had entered the mansion he had heard them partying in the living room and he had hoped to gather his stuff and leave before anyone noticed his presence, but then Bobby had walked in to the kitchen. Bobby, the birthday boy!

He invited everyone except me, naturelement. Why would he want me around? I'd just ruin the party. Oui, it's best I stay here, far away from them. They don't want me around cause of what I did in de past. Mon Dieu, I'm a thieving bastard... Got the Morlocks killed, couldn't treat Rogue right and...

Remy, why are you doing this to yourself? Listen to me, listen to reason...

Non, the voice couldn't be back again! He had just driven it away! Leave me alone, get outta my head! I don't want you in here! Sliding down the wall, he pressed his knuckles in to his temples, trying to batter the voice in to submission.

Remy, why are you staying with them when they don't want you? They don't know how special you are, how much you care. They don't know what they are throwing away by shunning you, but I know. I care for you. Please come home, Remy.

Non! And stay the fuck outta my mind! His mental barriers had weakened considerably since Antarctica. Before the ice he had been able to keep out the professor and Jean; he had even thrown Betsy out of his mind, but his defenses were weak now. If they tried, they could easily slip inside his mind. That was another reason why he had put some distance between them.

The voice remained silent and Remy sighed relieved. Maybe he had finally managed to get a grip on it. But now that everything was silent inside his mind, his own thoughts created even more wrinkles. They don't want me... they don't want me around. I'm worthless... no longer an active part of the team. What am I still doing here? Why are they letting me stay? Can't even go back to poppa, New Orleans is off territory to me. Can't do this anymore, can't do this anymore...

The guilt, pain and loneliness came crushing down on him and he sank in to them, unable to find his way back to the surface again. Why can't I do anything right? Why do I always screw up? I should know by now that I can't do it right. Why do I keep trying? I'm too tired to try again...

Tears leaked from his eyes and made their way down his cheeks. They dripped on to the floor and Remy pushed himself away from the wall, slowly making his way over to the kitchen table. He had already set the table for dinner before heading for the mansion and the knife simmered in the electric light.

Face it, LeBeau, you're a loser... Remy took hold of the knife and stared at the hypnotic tip. A complete loser. I always screw up. People get killed cause of me. What am I still doing here? I should have died in the tunnels and later on the ice, but Sinister kept me alive, damn him!

His hand trembled as he pushed the sleeve past his elbow. Slowly, determinedly, he placed the tip of the knife against his skin, not yet penetrating the tissue yet. I don't wanna do this anymore. I don't want this life anymore, mais I don't wanna die either. Mon Dieu, I don't know what to do!

Despair overwhelmed him and slowly, the tip of the knife dipped beneath the skin, drawing blood. Focusing on the cut, he pushed the tip in deeper until his teeth chattered and his body shook.

The thoughts inside his head slowed down, came to a halt, allowing him a moment of complete peace. Then the adrenaline rushed through his body, momentarily chasing away his emotional pain. But when the rush ended, he hissed. Blood dripped on to the kitchen table and he quickly removed the knife, grabbing a towel to press down on the wound.

Tears freely rivuleted down his face, and he tried hard not to move, to stay in the moment. But the moment passed and the guilt kept sneaking back in. Remy shook his head and got to his feet to take care of the cut. Once he had dealt with it, he walked in to the living area and sat down. He wrapped his arms around his waist and rocked slowly. Although his arm stung, he ignored it. A part of him even hoped they would call him in for a mission, but the comm. system remained quiet.

Quiet. Everything around him was quiet. He was the only living, breathing soul inside this house. The silence unnerved him and yet at the same time it soothed him. Closing his eyes, he tried to maintain the stillness of his thoughts, hoping to catch a few hours of sleep. It had been such a long time since he had slept undisturbed. Usually it took him hours of tossing and turning to fall asleep and even when he did, he woke several times a night, robbing him of a peaceful night rest.

Mon Dieu, I'd sell my soul to be back with poppa and tante...

Hahahaha...

The malicious laughter that echoed back at him froze his soul. The chilling sound sent shivers down his spine and his fingernails clawed the armrest. He's still there, inside my head... He never left...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bobby stared at the screen. After the party had ended, he had gone back to monitor duty because he had wanted to know if Remy had left or not. First, he checked on the boathouse. Lights shone from the living area and the kitchen; it definitely looked like the Cajun was in. To be on the safe side, he also checked the security logs and tapes and they showed him what he already suspected. Remy had headed back to the boathouse and had not left it.

Leaning back in his chair, Bobby considered his next move. He had managed to salvage the last pieces of the birthday cake once Logan knew he wanted to take them to Remy, but now he wasn't so sure he was welcome at the boathouse. Remy had made up that date just to get rid of him. What do I do? Take the hint and leave him alone or...? Being honest with himself, he had to admit to already having made up his mind. I'm going over there. I want to know why he's making up excuses. Remy's been shutting us out for some time now, even Scott and the professor agree that we need to rebuild the contact. Bringing him some birthday cake is a start.

Bobby checked the time; it was past midnight and although the lights were still on at the boathouse he was tempted to wait until morning to pay Remy his visit, but then again... What if he feels awfully lonely? The night is the worst time to be alone. I should go over there now and not wait.

Determinedly, Bobby rose from the chair and headed for the kitchen to collect two pieces of his birthday cake. When he arrived at the kitchen, he was somewhat surprised to find Scott there. "Shouldn't you be in bed already?" Scott didn't like staying up late and they often joked about it. "It's way past your bed time, Slim!"

Scott laughed softly. "I couldn't sleep and Jean's sound asleep, so I didn't want to wake her, tossing and turning all night." Scott raised his mug. "I came down here to drink some warm milk."

Bobby removed the cake from the fridge. "I'm going to pay Remy a little visit."

Scott suddenly seemed uncomfortable, shifting on his chair. "That's another reason why I couldn't sleep."

Bobby sat down at the kitchen table, studying his old friend. "I don't think you're to blame, Scott. Remy made the decision to move to the boathouse on his own. We never asked him to move out."

"But we didn't ask him to stay either." Scott sighed. "I've got a bad feeling about Remy."

Bobby raised an eyebrow. "In what way?"

"The few times I spoke to him I had the feeling that I wasn't getting through to him. The cocky smile was there, the smug expression was in place, but something was off."

Bobby nodded once. "I feel the same way and that's why I'm going over there now. I'll let you know what I find out." He pushed back the chair and got to his feet, carrying the plate with the birthday cake.

Scott almost mentioned that it was past one AM, but swallowed the remark. If Bobby wanted to do this now, he shouldn't stop his friend. "Get going, Bobby." He was eager to find out what was going on with Remy as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sharp fingernails pushed and pulled at the crust of dried blood that had formed on the cut. Stop doing that... It will only start bleeding again... But that was what he wanted, wasn't it?

It was deadly quiet at the boathouse and he had retreated to the couch with a book, hoping to read through the night, but his thoughts constantly drifted back to his encounter with Bobby in the kitchen. He hadn't expected Bobby to invite him, but the other man had only been polite.

Bobby had probably been relieved when his invitation was declined. They were enjoying the party and I wasn't meant to be there... They didn't know I needed food supplies. They probably thought I wouldn't notice what was going on. But he had known it was Bobby's birthday, he just hadn't bothered with a birthday present, knowing Drake wouldn't want one from him, the traitor.

Feeling miserable, he dabbed harder at the crust, pulling it off completely. Droplets of blood dripped down his arm and he grabbed some tissues to catch them. Usually the physical pain took the focus off the emotional one, but not this time. All he felt was loneliness and worthlessness. They didn't even think him worthy of attending the party. Why is this such a big deal to me? They have been ignoring me for weeks now, why does this hurt? Cause he still hoped they would accept him, at least the chipper, carefree man he pretended to be when he was around them. They had no idea how he truly felt, how cold and dark his world was.

Remy, come back to me... You don't have to be alone. You're doing this to yourself...

Remy flinched at the return of that voice. For once he didn't answer it, didn't tell it to go away and leave him alone; the voice was right. He was doing this to himself. Fortunately the voice remained quiet and he rested his head against the armrest of the couch, sliding down until he was lying down. He was cold, but too drained to get himself a blanket.

Lifting the tissues, he found that the bleeding had almost stopped. He should disinfect and bandage it. The bandage would also keep him from scratching it open again. Now he had to get up anyway. He dragged himself to his feet and stumbled over to the kitchen table where the first aid kit still sat. After disinfecting the wound, he applied the bandage, staring at the wounds and marks in disgust. Why couldn't he stop hurting himself? Wasn't he hurting enough yet?

The unexpected sound of the door bell made him jump nervously and he spun around. He frowned. It was one AM. Who was visiting him at this late hour? "Who's there?" He stared at the door, afraid it might open by itself. He quickly finished bandaging the wound and hid the first aid kit in a kitchen cupboard.

"It's me, Bobby. Come on, Remy! I saved you some cake!"

Remy hissed. Bobby? What the hell was Bobby doing here? "It's the middle of the night, homme!"

"I know that, but the cake is really great. I rescued it from Logan."

After releasing a resigned sigh, Remy walked over to the door and opened it. Bobby looked awfully chipper and awake for this late hour. "Why now? Can't we do this tomorrow?"

"Hum... It's already tomorrow," teased Bobby, entering resolutely. He placed the plate on the coffee table in the living room and looked up. "It doesn't look like you were asleep already, Remy."

Remy knew he was busted. "I was just getting ready to go to bed."

"What about your date then? Wasn't she interested?" Bobby sat down on the couch, studying Remy closely.

"She canceled the date," lied Remy. "Her tante was ill." He had to convince Bobby to leave again! He wasn't in the mood for company. He would probably attain his goal the fastest by playing along. He forced himself to smile and his mask slipped in to place again. "Cake looks delicious!" After retrieving some forks from the kitchen, he dug in, noticing that Bobby didn't touch his piece. "You ain't hungry, homme?"

"I already had several pieces." Bobby grew quiet again.

Remy grew uncomfortable under Bobby's probing look, but smiled brilliantly. "Everyone's bien at the mansion? How's Stormy doing?"

"Why don't you ask her yourself? When was the last time the two of you talked?"

"It's been a while..." Remy grinned. "Been busy chasing de femmes... Now that I'm no longer with Rogue I wanna enjoy freedom." But Bobby's expression told him that the other man wasn't buying it.

Cut the crap, Remy, Ever since I arrived you've been putting on an act, but I don't believe you. There never was a date and you don't look like you're enjoying freedom. You look like death warmed over. It's not that you lost much weight... You lost some, but it's something else and I'm not leaving before I made you talk about it. Bobby crossed his arms in front of his chest. "So you like the cake?"

Remy nodded. "It's great."

"You could have had the punch and company along with it if you had stayed at the mansion." Bobby noticed the little crack that showed in Remy's mask when the Cajun's eyes briefly widened. But you never wanted the company.

"Ai, mon ami, mais I didn't know the date was off! Had I known, I would have stayed." Remy tried to smile smugly, but was unable to pull it off.

Bobby decided not to pressure Remy in to telling him the truth. "Have you ever been to New Zealand?"

Remy's surprise at the changed topic showed on his face. "New Zealand? Non, why do you wanna know?"

"I'm planning a trip there and Warren's paying. Would you like to tag along, considering you haven't been there yourself?" Please, Remy, say yes. You need the break, to get away from Westchester.

Remy was stunned. "New Zealand? You and me? Don't need Warren's money though, got enough of my own..." The idea was tempting but... "Sorry, Bobby, mais I have to decline." If they were on the road together Bobby would find out what was going on with him. He had to maintain the safe distance between them.

"You don't have to decide right now." Bobby got to his feet again. When Remy offered him the plate with the last piece of birthday cake, he declined. "No, I had enough of the cake and I got a mountain of Twinkies to hide from. You seemed to like it. Consider it dessert."

Remy rose from the couch as well, giving Bobby a polite nod. "Merci, mon ami." He had come so damned close to accepting Bobby's offer to tag along, but it was too dangerous. Still, to his surprise he found that he liked having Bobby around. It had definitely shut up the voice in his head.

But Bobby wasn't giving up yet. "Would you help me plan my trip then? I haven't been to New Zealand before and you could help me decide on what places to visit." Suddenly, he frowned. Was that blood on Remy's long sleeved shirt? How did it get there?

Remy tried hard to hide his unease. "Don't know if I'll have the time, Bobby, maybe..." Every moment Bobby spent close to him presented a danger.

"By the way, you've got blood on your sleeve. Did you accidentally cut yourself?" Bobby pointed at the sleeve.

Remy grew pale. He quickly hid the bloody sleeve from Bobby's view and desperately searched for a plausible explanation. "Oui, was opening a bottle of wine and slipped."

Bobby looked about. Strange, he didn't see any wine. "You should take care of that. You don't want to risk an infection and have Hank come down on you for not taking care of it."

"I will." Remy managed a reassuring smile.

"I'll drop by tomorrow and bring my maps and travel guides of New Zealand. We can use the net to find the information we're missing."

Remy wished he could say non, but he didn't want to disappoint Bobby, plus the other man might get suspicious at being denied. "Not too early, mon ami. I like to sleep late." That was in case he fell asleep at all.

"Sure, I'll drop by in the afternoon." Bobby moved to the door. His instincts were going haywire, telling him something was wrong, really wrong. The thing that bugged him most was the blood on Remy's sleeve.

Remy smiled and watched Bobby close the door behind him. Exhausted and relieved, he leaned against the wall. Mon Dieu, Bobby had seen the bloody stain on his sleeve! Stupid! I should have make sure the bandage was in place! Now Bobby knows something's is up. He pushed up the sleeve and sighed, seeing the blood drenched bandage.

While changing the bandage he barely refrained from dabbing at the wound to worsen its bleeding. Knowing that Bobby was suspicious made him cautious. He applied a clean bandage and climbed the stairs to his bedroom. Not bothering to change his clothes, he curled up on his side.

Remy, Drake knows. You can't stay at Westchester. Come back to me...

Non! Leave me alone... Sobbing, Remy curled up tighter, trying to ignore the voice in his head.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So what happened?" Scott had waited up for Bobby, curious to find out about Remy's reaction to the nightly visit.

Bobby headed for the living room at hearing Scott's voice. A few Twinkies lay scattered over the floor and he did his best to ignore them. He didn't know what Hank had been thinking, but he refused to stuff himself with the lethal sugar rolls. Bobby sat down opposite Scott and gave his friend a thoughtful look. "Something is very wrong."

"Why do you say that?" Scott sipped his warm milk with honey, hoping it would make him sleep later.

"He was acting. What I saw wasn't real. Remy was putting on an act for me." Bobby thought back to the ominous feeling that had swept through him when he had left. "And there was blood on his sleeve. He said he had cut himself accidentally, opening a bottle, but I didn't see any wine."

"What do you think is really going on?" Scott placed his mug on the coffee table. Hell, he felt guilty for letting things spin this much out of control.

Bobby leaned in closer, making eye-contact. "I think he's on the verge of a breakdown. Something's really eating him."

"Should I go get him? Take him back to the mansion?"

Bobby shook his head. "I don't think he wants to be here right now. I offered him to tag along when I leave for New Zealand, but he declined. He kept talking about his dates and the femmes, but he hasn't left the premises for one week at least." Seeing Scott's surprise, he added, "I had monitor duty, remember?"

Scott sighed. "Would it help if I talked to him?"

"I don't know, Slim. I don't know what's going on with Remy, but talking to him might be a start."

"That's settled then. I'm paying him a visit tomorrow."

Bobby settled back in his seat. "We let this slip for too long, Scott. Why?"

Scott shook his head. "Beats me. It's not like us to forget about a teammate. Maybe Remy's making things too easy on us. By moving to the boathouse he disappeared from view and I thought he didn't want us around, maybe that's just an act?"

"That's very well possible." Bobby got to his feet again, waved and wished Scott a good night. As he climbed the stairs to his room, he couldn't stop thinking about the look in Remy's eyes. He had glimpsed a hint of madness in them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy? Remember the good times we shared? Remember how much I love you and that you loved me? We were happy. We can have that again. You don't have to hide from me. Your betrayal hurt, but I can overcome that, if you come to me willingly.

"Oh, mon Dieu, just go away and leave me alone!" The voice was back, whispering in to his mind, seducing him with memories that countered his current lonely existence. "You never loved me. You played games, you still do. You don't know what love is!"

No, you showed me. That's why you're special, Remy. You're an empath. You intensified our love, our experiences. I don't want to lose that.

"You lost me a long time ago. You hurt me so bad!" Remy sobbed softly. The presence, the voice inside his mind didn't give in, stayed strong. "I want you to leave me alone!"

I know how much you're hurting. I know what you're doing to yourself. It hurts so bad, being alone, knowing that they don't want you. How did it feel, finding out that they even excluded you from the birthday party? Come on, Remy, be honest with yourself.

It was true, but he wasn't going to admit to it. "They forgot!"

They didn't forget. They know you're staying at the boathouse, on your own. Stop making excuses for them and come back to me. Why are you fighting this?

"Because I don't love you and you don't love me!" Remy's fingers clawed his already injured arm, sought out the still healing wounds and pressed hard, causing him to yelp softly. "Go away!"

It worked. The pain drove away the taunting voice, but then the silence thundered all around him. He kicked off the comforter and jumped to his feet. His stomach convulsed and he quickly covered his mouth with his hand, hoping the birthday cake would stay down. A few moments later, he sighed relieved. It was staying down after all.

Remy slipped into his jeans and sweater and descended the stairs. He felt claustrophobic and he needed to get out in the open. Not bothering to grab his coat, he dashed out of the house and headed for the black lake.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sitting on the cold, wet grass, Remy stared at the tempting black water. If he walked in to it and didn't struggle it would all be over with in a few minutes, but he wasn't ready to give up yet. Damn that voice! If only it would leave him alone!

"Hey, what are you doing out here, Remy?"

Remy startled and he jumped to his feet, ready to defend himself if necessary. His body tense, he tried to keep up the front the X-Men had become used to. "Homme, should be asking what you are doing here. Why ain't you in bed with your beautiful femme?"

Scott cocked his head. "I can't seem to sleep properly these days. So what are you doing out here?"

"Needed some fresh air," said Remy evasively. He had to think fast. "Was just on my way back from my date."

Scott decided not to react to the obvious lie. "It's beautiful out here, isn't it?" He lowered himself on to the grass, just a few inches away from where Remy had been sitting.

Remy, who was totally confused by now, remained standing. What was he supposed to say? Or do?

"Come on, sit down, Remy." Scott signaled the Cajun to sit down beside him. "It's about time we had a little talk."

Frowning, Remy accepted the invitation. He still felt suspicious; why would Scott want to talk to him all of a sudden? Was he getting the boot? Was Scott here to tell him to leave Westchester and never come back again? He wasn't sure he could deal with that.

"I'm sorry we forgot to invite you to Bobby's birthday. It wasn't done on purpose. It just slipped our minds," apologized Scott.

Remy, don't believe him! He's manipulating you! I don't know what he's up to, but he doesn't have your best interest in mind. Be careful!

Remy winced at the return of the voice, but managed to show no outer distress. He didn't want Scott to see how emotionally wrecked he really was. "Don't worry about it. I don't care." That was a big fat lie and the voice in the back of his mind chided him for it.

"I don't believe that." Scott's glance traveled from the lake to Remy's face. It wasn't the first time that the red on black eyes stunned him. They were even spookier in the dark. "I believe you felt left out and rightly so. I'm really sorry about that... Maybe you want to join us for dinner tomorrow evening?"

"I don't think that's a good idea." Remy trembled. He really wanted the company, the distraction, but he couldn't accept the invitation. Warren would be there, Betsy and Rogue and all the other X-Men. "I'm eating out tomorrow anyway, maybe another time." Was it his imagination or did Scott's expression sadden? Had to be his overactive imagination.

"Just remember, the invitation stands." Scott got to his feet. "I should head back before Jean wakes up and gets worried. Please reconsider? We would love to have you over for dinner."

Remy, it's a lie, don't listen to him! He's playing games with you. They don't want you there! If they really did they would have invited you a long time ago! They are up to something!

Remy swallowed hard. He hated to admit it, but the voice was probably right. "Non, thanks anyways." He got to his feet as well and barely repressed a sharp hiss when his arm stung. Maybe the wound had started to bleed again. He should check on it when he got home...

Home, Remy, the boathouse isn't home. Your home is with me.

Remy shook his head firmly. "No, it isn't."

"Remy?" Scott looked up, worried.

"Nothing. I was just thinking aloud," apologized Remy. The cold was suddenly getting to him and he shivered fiercely. "I'd better head back home now..."

Scott watched him leave, barely repressing the urge to follow the Cajun to the boathouse and to talk some sense into the younger man. But no, he had to give Remy time. A wound so deep couldn't heal with one dinner invitation. This would take time. A lot of time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy... Remy... I'm still here. Why are you ignoring me? I won't let you sleep, you know that. You'll only know peace once you come back to me.

"Non, stop it, leave me alone. I ain't coming back to you. Just stop it." Remy had tossed and turned in bed for the last few hours. The voice continued to haunt him, never leaving him alone. He craved a few minutes of peace and quiet in his head. The professor of Jean could maybe help him rebuild his former defenses, but that meant letting them in and he refused to do that. He didn't want them to know who was harassing him.

The voice in the back of his head continued to seduce him, but he managed to detach himself from it by focusing on his earlier conversations with Bobby and Scott. It still surprised him that they had admitted to making a mistake by not inviting him. He was almost beginning to believe that they had been honest.

During Bobby's visit the voice had been silent, had stopped harassing him. Would it work again? But how was he supposed to pull that one off? Ring up Bobby and tell him to drop by... again? Bobby would probably laugh at him. But then again, maybe Bobby would come to the boathouse.

Don't count on it, Remy. Drake is merely playing games.

"Non, I refuse to believe that..." He had to believe that Bobby had been sincere if he wanted to hang on to his sanity.

Remy, you're deluding yourself. Drake doesn't want anything to do with you. I am the one who wants to love you, take care of you. Why do you continue to deny me? You know I can take what I want, I'm so much stronger than you... but I want you to come to me out of your own free will.

"Never! I will never choose you! Why can't you accept that!" Remy left his bed and slipped into a pair of wasted jeans and a shirt. He didn't bother to put on boots or a coat. He fled the boathouse and found himself running toward the mansion. Had he finally lost his mind?

He stopped thinking and let his body take over. Within seconds, he was climbing a wall, heading for Bobby's window. Was that it? Was something in his mind convinced that Drake could help?

Do you really want to do this? Remy, do you really want to hear Drake yell for you to get the hell out of his room? The others will hear the commotion and they will chase you out of the house. Don't do this to yourself, Remy.

"Non, you're lying! Bobby won't tell me to leave! He'll let me in!"

Then find out for yourself, Remy.

Suddenly the voice seemed to flee his mind and Remy calmed down. He had reached Bobby's window and sat balanced on the ridge. Looking through the window, and in to Bobby's room, he found that Drake was peacefully asleep in his bed. Apparently it was warm in the room because Bobby was only wearing boxers and he had kicked the covers to the foot end of the bed. Remy felt envious of Bobby's ability to sleep like that. He couldn't remember the last night he had slept peacefully.

Sitting on the ledge like that, he started to feel guilty for spying on Bobby. Drake had no idea that he was being watched. "I should leave. When he sees me..."

Exactly at that moment Bobby stirred. His eyes opened unexpectedly and Remy flinched, as Bobby made eye contact with him. His first reaction was to flee, to jump in to the tree that stood next to the window, to slide down and quickly run back to the boathouse. But then Bobby's lips moved and Remy had no trouble making it out the word.

"Stay..." Bobby jumped out of his bed, and ran over to the window. He opened it, always maintaining eye contact with Remy. "What are you doing out here?" Why hadn't Remy taking the stairs?

"Sorry, Bobby," started Remy, feeling guilty for waking the other man from his sleep. "I don't know what I'm doing here..." But he hoped that while he was here the voice would stay away.

"Come on inside, man, must be cold out there." He frowned, realizing that Remy was bare footed. Remy shivered and Bobby wondered if it was due to the cold or because of something else. He stepped aside and Remy lowered himself on to the floor. Bobby quickly closed the window and then shooed Remy over to the bed. "Sit down..."

Remy hesitantly sat down. He had felt safer out there on the ledge. Now he had to explain why he had come here.

"Cold?" Bobby grabbed a blanket from the bed and draped it across Remy's shoulders. "You're shivering, man."

Remy let him, strangely touched by Bobby's concern. Had he misjudged Drake after all? Thankfully the voice remained quiet, not messing with his head for a change. The silence was like a soothing balm.

"Are you okay, Remy?" Bobby disliked the absentminded expression on Remy's face. The Cajun seemed a million miles away from him, even though he was in the same room with him. Bobby pulled up a chair and sat opposite Remy, catching the tremors that shook the Cajun's hands. For some elusive reason he wanted to clasp his fingers around Remy's hands, but held back. He wasn't sure Remy would welcome his touch. "Remy?"

Remy looked up and flinched. Bobby's compassionate eyes assured him that he was welcome here. The voice had lied! "Don't know why I'm here," he repeated, confused. "Couldn't stay at the boathouse any longer..."

"Yeah, it can get lonely out at the boathouse." Bobby decided to give Remy some time to sort out his thoughts. He would find out later why Remy favored the wall to the stairs. He had never expected to find Remy outside of his window. Remy shivered again and the Cajun's eyes were bleak, lacking their usual gleam. The Cajun looked exhausted, tired. "It's the middle of the night, Remy, wanna nap here?" There had to be a reason why Remy had fled the boathouse.

"Don't wanna impose," protested Remy weakly. "Should go back..." But his body refused to move and he lacked the energy to behave like his usual cocky self. Bobby was already seeing too much of his true self and that scared him. What would Bobby do with the knowledge that he was on the verge of a breakdown?

"The bed should be big enough for the two of us. Just tell me you're not a blanket hog..." But his words were lost on Remy. "Wow, he's already asleep, sitting up like that." Carefully he helped Remy to lie down and made sure the Cajun was comfortable. He briefly considered contacting Scott or Hank to inform them of their nightly visitor, but decided against it. Remy had come to see him, not the others! But that left him with one dead tired Cajun in his bed!

Bobby grinned and lay down as well. Remy was facing him and he noticed the deep lines etched on to Remy's brow. When had those appeared? Frowning, he studied the Cajun closer. One sleeve had moved up Remy's arm, revealing a bandage. "What happened?" His curiosity almost got the better of him and he wanted to check beneath the bandage, but in the end he respected Remy's privacy and didn't.

Barely resisting the urge to touch Remy, Bobby pushed his hands beneath his head. He had always liked Remy, but recent events had driven them apart. Antarctica had changed things between them forever and then there was Rogue. They both had had a crush on her, competed for her attention, but Remy had won in the end. When Rogue and Remy had ended the relationship, he had hoped he would get a shot at a relationship with Rogue, but then found that the attraction was gone. While Remy and Rogue had been together he had seen Rogue do a few things that he didn't approve of, like leaving Remy behind on the ice. Ice was his friend and he couldn't imagine what it had been like for Remy, who had always hated the cold and now more than before.

And now the Cajun had sought him out, for whatever reason. Apparently Remy felt safe here, safe enough to simply fall asleep during a conversation. Now what was that about? Bobby continued to study his unexpected guest. Remy looked worn down, pale, skinny and the Cajun now started to mumble in his sleep, moving about in the bed.

"Hey, it's okay, Remy. I don't know what's going on, but you're okay." Although he had earlier decided not to touch Remy, he now reconsidered and rested his hand on Remy's shoulder, reassuringly rubbing it through the shirt. "It's okay, Remy, it's okay." His words seemed to calm Remy and the Cajun's sleep became peaceful again. What demons haunted Remy's dreams? "I'm gonna find out."

Listening to Remy's steady breathing, he closed his eyes. Lulled into a sense of safety by the warm presence next to him, he dozed off as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy yawned, stretched and settled back in the warm embrace. Smiling, he enjoyed feeling a warm body close to him. What? A warm body? Merde! His eyes flashed open, scared to find himself in the wrong embrace. He sighed relieved, looking at Bobby's face. Mon Dieu, now he began to remember! Last night he had left the boathouse and had come here in an attempt to chase away the voice and it had worked. This was the first night of undisturbed sleep that he had had during weeks!

Bobby had opened the window and invited him, had told him to take a nap and was now sharing his bed with him. He had completely misjudged Bobby!

No, you didn't misjudge him, Remy. Come on, be honest. You know why he allowed you in his bed! You know what he wants, what I want. We want your body, your love. You're a wet dream come true. You might want to run now, before Drake wants to collect, or are you willing to pay his price?

Merde, the voice was back, voicing his worst fear. Non, you're wrong! Bobby ain't like that! He ain't like you!

Remy, are you sure you want to find out? I suggest you get moving now or do you want to find out the hard way? Do you still remember what it feels like to be made love to? To be fucked? Do you want to experience it again? Don't let Drake do that to you. You know you're meant to be with me only.

"Stop it! Just stop it! He ain't like that!" Remy wanted to free himself of the embrace but felt frozen when Bobby's concerned eyes opened and locked with his.

"What's going on, Remy?" Seeing the Cajun's distress, Bobby immediately backed off, releasing Remy from his embrace. He sat upright, farther increasing the distance between them. "What do you want to stop?" He hadn't been doing anything inappropriate in his sleep, had he? God, he would feel damned embarrassed if he had!

Remy closed his eyes, unable to deal with Bobby's expression. "It ain't you..." Remy scrambled to his feet and left the bed, leaning against the wall. Merde, he felt weak like a kitten!

That's it, Remy, move away from him. Open the door and leave, come back to me! Don't stay here!

"Stop it!" Tears, that had lurked in his eyes, suddenly surfaced and he slid down the wall until he landed on his butt. He pulled up his knees and rocked slowly.

"Remy?" Worried Bobby quickly joined Remy, sitting on his heels in front of the Cajun. "Remy?" Fuck, Remy was crying! Tears rolled down the Cajun's face and Bobby felt helpless. Maybe this was a good time to contact Scott or Hank? But no, Remy would never forgive him if they saw him in this way. "What's wrong? Why don't you tell me?"

"Can't tell you..." Remy quickly wiped away his tears, trying to compose himself again. "I should leave."

"Oh no, you're not leaving before I know what's going on." But Bobby realized how important it was that Remy had some privacy right now. "Promise me not to leave while I'm gone?"

"Where are you going?" Remy, who had calmed down somewhat, stared at Bobby.

"I'm going to get us some coffee and bagels. I don't know about you, but I need some breakfast."

Remy shrugged. "I ain't hungry."

Bobby didn't really believe it. "Just promise me you won't leave. I want to talk to you, okay?" Bobby hoped Remy would accept.

"I promise," whispered Remy defeated.

Stupid! What a stupid thing to do! Drake just wants to get in your pants. Don't let his so called concern for you fool you, Remy!

"Just shut up!" Remy clutched his head, rocking again.

"Why don't I move you back to the bed? You'll be warm and more comfortable there." Bobby noticed the way Remy flinched when he helped the Cajun to his feet, but didn't comment on it. Within seconds, he had Remy tucked safely away in his bed. "Just stay there."

Remy was too exhausted to protest. The voice was silent now, but for how much longer?

Bobby slipped into some jeans and a shirt and left the room. He leaned against the door after closing it. What had he gotten himself in to? And damn it, he couldn't go behind Remy's back and contact Hank! He sighed and his stomach growled. "Breakfast first and then we'll see what happens next." He headed for the kitchen, poured them some coffee, buttered some toast, added some bagels and carried the tray upstairs. Thankfully he encountered no one. "Please be still there, Remy."

He realized that he had been holding his breath when he let it out after opening the door to his room. Remy was still in bed all right, eyes tightly shut. "Coffee?" Bobby carried the tray to the bed, placed it on the nightstand and handed Remy a mug filled with the black liquid.

"Merci, Bobby." Remy opened his eyes and met Bobby's curiously concerned glance. "You must think I went mad."

"No, not mad, but I'm worried that something's wrong with you." Bobby took a bite from his bagel. "Remy, what's going on?"

Remy sighed. He couldn't tell Bobby. "I don't know. I haven't felt that great lately."

Bobby decided to push. "Earlier on you wanted it to stop. What do you want to stop?"

Remy's eyes widened as Bobby placed a hand on top of his. The warm, human contact almost took his breath away. In a daze, he heard himself answer Bobby's question. "The voice..."

"What voice?" Bobby frowned, feeling tremors course through Remy's body. He squeezed Remy's hand reassuringly, letting the Cajun know that he wasn't alone. "I didn't hear a thing."

"The voice inside my head," said Remy reluctantly.

Don't tell him! Don't you dare tell him, LeBeau! This is between you and me!

"I can't... I can't deal with it any more..." Remy sought out Bobby's eyes, mentally preparing himself for the disgust that would shortly shine from them.

"Whose voice is inside your head, Remy?" Bobby moved a little closer, his eyes glued to Remy's stare.

Don't you dare, LeBeau! If you do, you will suffer the consequences!

Remy knew he was digging his own grave, but the pressure was too much. "Sinister's."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bobby's jaw almost hit the floor. "Sinister? What's that bastard doing inside your mind?" Stunned, he sank down on the bed. Staring at Remy, he caught the tremors coursing through the Cajun's body and the scared expression in his alien eyes. "Why didn't you tell us earlier? We can help. I'm sure someone can help. Let me get Hank and..." Bobby was about to jump to his feet, but Remy grabbed his arm, establishing a tight hold on his wrist. "Remy?"

"Non, you ain't telling Hank what's going on."

Bobby heard a scared undertone in Remy's voice. "Why? Hank only wants to help."

But Remy shook his head. "It's my problem."

Bobby frowned and sat down again. Remy's hold on him loosened slightly. "If you really believed that you wouldn't be here right now. You came here for a reason."

"The voice's driving me insane," admitted Remy. "It started a few weeks ago. It was weak at first, but it's been growing stronger..."

Bobby moistened his lips. "Remy? Betsy once told me that you had formidable mental shields. How can Sinister get through?"

Remy sighed. He should never have told Bobby what was going on. He knew Drake well enough to know that Bobby would continue to hassle him. "Shields ain't that strong anymore."

"Huh? Explain that to me?" Remy removed his hand, giving him back his freedom, but Bobby stayed where he was.

"Things changed after... Antarctica." It wasn't his favorite subject and he didn't want Bobby to know what had happened after Rogue had left him. "Shields weakened somehow. It's hard to keep things out and Sinister... He's strong."

"Yeah, I remember something about him having telepathic powers." Bobby carefully considered his next step. "So why is he in your head?" Remy's expression told him that the Cajun didn't want Sinister there and he proceeded carefully. "What does he want from you?"

Remy shook his head. "Can't tell you."

"Why not?"

"It's... painful." Bobby wouldn't want to be friends with him once Drake knew the truth and he desperately needed a friend right now.

"So he's hurting you? Is he in there right now? Talking to you?" Bobby didn't know what to think of Remy's revelations. He wanted to ask the Cajun a million questions, but realized it was the wrong time to do so. Remy needed to tell his story in his own time.

"Non, not right now... He's been quiet since you got back." Remy raised his eyes and peeked at Bobby's, surprised to find concern and acceptance. He had been scared when telling Bobby about Sinister, scared that Drake would throw him out. After all Sinister was one of the X-Men's worst enemies and he did share a history with Sinister. Enough reason for Bobby not to trust him.

"So what does he say to you?" Bobby moved a little closer, suddenly realizing that Remy's hand now rested on top of his, tightly clutching it and he didn't mind it one bit. It made him feel good to give Remy the support the Cajun needed and to provide a listening ear. He loved to help. "How bad is it?"

"I don't wanna talk about him..." Now that it was quiet in his head, he wanted to hold on to the silence.

"I can understand that you don't want to tell me," Bobby reasoned, "but please consider talking to a telepath. If your shields are so weak that Sinister can get through, we need to do something about that." Bobby gave Remy a thoughtful look. The Cajun didn't seem too happy about that suggestion. "I know you don't like Betsy, but what about Jean or the professor? I would help you myself, but I'm not a telepath. If you really want to deal with this, you'll need help."

"Not Betsy..." Remy shuddered. Betsy gave him the creeps, plus she was Warren's girlfriend. Once Betsy knew what was going on, Warren would know as well. He couldn't take that risk. "And not Jean." Same thing; Jean wouldn't be able to keep his secrets from Scott. The couple shared everything. "Maybe the professor."

"Great!" Bobby jumped to his feet and this time Remy let him. "I'm going to talk to him and bring him here. You will wait for us in my room?"

Remy sighed. No matter how much he hated the fact that Charles would find out the sordid truth, he couldn't deal with Sinister's manipulation much longer. Sinister was wearing him down.

Unexpectedly Bobby rested a hand on his arm and Remy flinched as the burn flashed with pain. He bit down the pain, trying not show it hurt, but Bobby had grown suspicious; he could see it in the brown eyes.

"I noticed the bandage earlier..." Bobby thought back to the conversation they had had in the boathouse. "Did that happen when you opened that wine bottle?"

"Oui," whispered Remy lost.

"You should let Hank have a look at it. You don't want it to become infected." Bobby didn't buy the wine bottle story any longer. "Remy, there was no wine bottle, huh? I didn't see one when I visited you and you didn't smell of wine."

Remy turned his head away from Bobby. "Maybe I'd better leave." Bobby was getting way too curious.

"No, stay. I'm sorry I asked..." Bobby quickly apologized, scared that Remy would feel cornered and run. "Just stay here. I'll be back with the professor."

Remy stared at the wall, refusing to meet Bobby's eyes. "Can't make that promise." He was risking it all by letting Charles in to his mind. He had to protect himself, the little trust and friendship Bobby showed him would vanish once Drake knew the truth.

"Please, Remy. Don't run away. Running away doesn't solve a thing. I remember when Emma Frost took over. She was inside my mind, controlling it. I couldn't stop her and I felt so damn helpless... It's easy to run, it's harder to face up to your fears."

Remy laughed bitterly. Like he didn't know that! Facing his fears was what had gotten him into this situation in the first place! "Sometimes that's no longer an option, Bobby," he whispered in the end.

"We'll figure things out, I promise." Bobby startled himself by meaning every word of that promise. He hadn't known he was this committed to helping Remy. He needed a private moment and left the room to fetch the professor.

Remy watched Bobby flee. Drake's emotions had been all over his face and he could read Bobby's face like an open book. "He cares about me... I didn't know..."

It's a game, remember! It's just a game!

Remy shook his head. "I don't believe you. I don't want you around no more, don't you understand? We're through; it's over!"

No, Remy... It'll never be over...

Overcome by the hopelessness of the situation, Remy curled up in Bobby's bed, pulled the comforter over his body and tried to hold on until Bobby's return. However, the voice never wavered and continued to drive him insane.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Professor? Can I have a word with you?" Bobby entered Charles' study and waited for the older man to signal him to approach.

Charles had already picked up on Bobby's distress, but had refrained from prying in to the young man's mind. It seemed that Bobby was more than willing to share. "Yes, Robert?"

"There's a problem... with Remy."

"Remy?" Charles frowned. "I haven't seen him around for some time..." Now that he came to think of it, when had he seen the Cajun for the last time?

Bobby, embarrassed, cleared his throat. "Remy's been staying at the boathouse for some weeks now... You knew that, didn't you?" Charles had been distracted lately, but had the professor really forgotten about Remy?

"Boathouse? Oh yes, I remember Scott telling me something about that." He studied Bobby closely and felt some of the young man's disappointment and yes, Bobby was right. He should have made time to spend with the team and with Remy in particular, but he was still trying to deal with the memories Onslaught had left in his mind. "What's the problem, Bobby?" He would make time now.

"Remy's been acting odd lately and when I visited him in the boathouse I got the impression he might be depressed. I offered to let him tag along on my vacation, but he refused. Last night, he suddenly appeared at my window. He rather climbed the wall than use the stairs."

Charles nodded encouragingly, realizing he had neglected Gambit's needs. For some reason they had never had the in depth conversations, which he used to have with all of his students.

"He appeared confused and was so tired that he fell asleep sitting upright on my bed. He spent the night in my room and his sleep was troubled. My guess is that he's been suffering from nightmares for quite some time." Bobby made eye contact with the professor. "Just a few minutes ago, he told me what was wrong. Sinister found a way to slip past his shields, which seem to have weakened considerably, and is now talking to him in his mind. I don't what Sinister's saying. Remy refuses to discuss it. I told him we would help him and that's why I'm here. Will you come with me, sir? Remy's still in my room, at least I hope so. He really needs your help to rebuild those shields."

Charles had listened with growing disbelief. "What? Sinister found a way to harass him telepathically? Why wasn't I told?" But the real question was, why hadn't he noticed himself? He used to have a tight connection with his students, but then again, he had never really 'bonded' with Gambit. Maybe that was the reason why he hadn't noticed the invasion, but damn it, he should have known! He was their teacher, their mentor! "Of course I will help!"

"Thank you, sir..." Bobby moved over to the doorway and waited for Charles to join him.

Charles steered his hover chair into the corridor and Bobby fell in to step beside him. "What else can you tell me about Remy and Sinister?"

"He just wants it to stop, at least that was what he called out when the pressure got too much... And there's something else..."

Charles noticed the hesitance in Bobby's voice. "Yes?"

"I..." Bobby hesitated. "First there was blood on his shirt and later I noticed a bandage. I don't believe him when he says he got hurt opening a wine bottle."

Charles nodded. "Fighting mental pain with physical pain... Remy might have turned to doing just that." That idea worried him. It meant Remy didn't trust them to help him when he really needed them.

They had reached Bobby's room and he opened the door, hoping Remy would still be in his bed. "Remy? I brought the professor." Bobby's breath caught, seeing Remy curled up on his bed, shaking like a leaf and mumbling intelligibly. "Ow, shit..."

Charles had strengthened his own shields, as he didn't want to be sucked in to Remy's mind just yet. The Cajun's pitiful state urged him in to action and he steered his hover chair over to the bed. "Remy?" Remy lay facing him and the Cajun's contorted features worried him. He frowned, finding Remy dabbing at the wound on his arm. The bandage lay on the bed, no longer protecting the wound. This called for immediate action.

"Do you want me to leave?" Bobby hoped Charles would tell him to stay. Maybe he could help somehow. Instinctively, he moved closer until he caught a glimpse of Remy's face. "You have to help him..."

"I'll try," promised Charles, "And yes, Robert, I want you to stay. Come over here and sit down behind him."

Bobby obeyed, sat down on the bed and followed Charles' instructions when the older man told him to rest his back against the headboard and to pull Remy's head in to his lap.

Now that Remy was correctly positioned, Charles placed his hands on either side of Remy's head and focused. "Robert, irregardless of what happens next, don't let Remy leave. He needs to stay in place."

Bobby nodded. "You can count on me."

Charles drew in a deep breath, mentally preparing himself for this journey. "Remy, can you hear me?" The closed eyes didn't tell him much. Remy could be shutting him out on purpose or maybe the Cajun was merely fatigued.

"Oui, monsieur. I can hear you..." Remy lay motionless. Bobby was too close and the other man's body warmth seemed to warm his icy body. Feeling Charles' hands on either side of his head was an odd sensation. It had been a while since anyone had touched him.

"Bobby told me what Sinister is doing to you. Can you tell me how and when it started?" Although Charles was curious to find out more, he refrained from prying telepathically. He wanted Remy's permission to enter his mind first.

"It started after Antarctica," revealed Remy reluctantly. "My shields weakened and his voice managed to get through. He has been there ever since..." He heard Bobby's surprised gasp.

"But Antarctica happened six months ago! Are you telling me that Sinister's been harassing since six months?" Bobby raised an eyebrow. Six months? Six months of hell!

"Oui..." Remy grew calm beneath Charles' touch. The professor's fingers massaged his temples, luring him into relaxation.

"Yes, that's it." Charles nodded approvingly, as the tension flowed from Remy's body. "Can you feel Sinister right now?"

"Oui, but he's quiet. He ain't talking... But I can feel his presence." Remy suddenly became very much aware of Bobby's closeness. Drawing reassurance and comfort from the other man's presence, he let go of the last remnants of tension. Bobby and Charles were here to help him... He had to believe that.

"Yes, we're here to help you," whispered Charles as he cautiously established telepathic contact. "Remy, will you let me inside? I can locate Sinister and build defenses that will keep him out."

Remy released a choked sigh. "Oui, please..." He didn't remember what his life had been like before Sinister's voice had appeared in his mind, couldn't remember the peace and quiet he had known, but he wanted to experience it again, even if it meant letting in Charles and risk it all.

Charles closed his eyes and concentrated on his student. Remy's mind was as elusive as quicksand; every time when he thought he was completely past the Cajun's defenses, he was stopped again. Even weakened, Remy's shields were still something. "You have to relax completely, Remy. I need you to trust me."

Remy swallowed hard. "Sorry, monsieur..." Trusting someone didn't come easy these days. He forced himself to welcome the professor in his mind. A few minutes later he felt Charles' presence take shape in his mind.

What do you think you're doing, LeBeau? I told you that this was just between you and me!

Charles heard Sinister's telepathic voice and honed in on it. Sinister was very strong inside Remy's mind, anchored to the Cajun's thoughts. Shutting out Sinister would take time and effort. Hiding inside Remy's mind, Charles began building his defenses, hiding his work from Sinister. Remy, keep him busy. I'm shielding my attempts, but you need to distract him. We can't risk Sinister finding out what we're doing!

Remy shivered. It was a good thing Bobby wasn't privy to their telepathic conversation. Go away, I already told you that it's over. Why can't you accept that and let me be?

Because you belong to me in heart and soul, LeBeau. You can run, but I will always find you. You could make everything so much easier on you by accepting me again as your lover. All I want is your love, your body, your presence.

Non, what you want is my empathy and my obedience. It ain't happening, Sinister.

You just to call me Nathan, not Sinister. Don't you remember the love we shared? The time we spend together was a time filled with bliss and you threw it all away!

Remy sighed. How many times had he already tried to explain to Sinister that he wasn't interested anymore? It didn't matter; Sinister never listened. Nathan was an illusion. You hid yourself from me and gave me an illusion and I fell for it. I was young, naive and I didn't know better. Now I do.

I'm running out of patience, Remy. Deny me and you're signing your death warrant! If I can't have you, no one will.

I'd rather be dead than yours again! When I wanted to leave you, you sent me into the tunnels and had Sabertooth cut me open!

I didn't want you to die, Remy.

Non, you wanted to be my savior, nurse me back to health so I'd be eternally grateful. Guess what, it didn't work that way! Creed told me he was acting under your orders and the Med's found me before you had a chance to get to me! Because of you I nearly died and you call that love?

Remy? I'm almost ready with fortifying your shields. I want you to retreat from Sinister. Try to run away from him, let him chase you and then the shields will slam in to place.

Remy followed Charles' instructions. Sinister, I don't want you no more! He tried to retreat from the obscure presence in his mind and when Sinister tried to reach out again, the strengthened shields stopped him. Remy sighed relieved, feeling Sinister batter against his shields, but they held! "Merci, mon Dieu!"

Charles, tired, leaned back in to the comfort of his hover chair. He clasped his hands in front of him and studied Remy closely. "The shields are holding?"

"Oui, merci, monsieur." Knowing that Sinister couldn't manipulate him any more caused tears to appear in his eyes. Finally it was quiet inside his mind. But now he stared at Charles, realizing the professor had heard everything. I'm sorry... I'll leave if you want me to.

You were... what? Lovers? Charles arched an eyebrow. I have trouble believing that.

I can't talk about it, not now, maybe later... Remy abruptly tried to sit upright, startling Bobby who didn't expect him to move. His glance settled on Bobby, who looked pale and even shaky. Was something wrong? "I need to go now..."

"No, you're staying, please Remy." Charles stopped Remy by placing a hand on his arm. "Sinister's targeting you and you can't leave the mansion. At least here you are somewhat safe. Plus, we should have a look at that wound. It looks infected."

Remy stared at the burn. Charles had made a valid point. "I'll disinfect and bandage it."

"Bobby, get the first aid kit?" Charles locked eyes with Bobby. Don't tell Remy that you overheard everything. He isn't ready to reveal his involvement with Sinister/Nathan to you. I should have shut you out, but I needed a link with you in case Sinister proved too strong.

But professor do you really think they were lovers? Remy and Sinister? Bobby was trying his best to act like nothing out of the ordinary had happened, but learning about Remy and Sinister had shaken him. Sinister's a monster!

I know that, Bobby, but we should be careful not to judge Remy before we know all the facts. Remy also said that Sinister presented him with an illusion. Maybe Remy didn't know it was Sinister.

Bobby nodded. The professor was probably right; Sinister must have misled the Cajun. He couldn't picture Remy willingly give in to Sinister... Lovers, they had been lovers! Remy LeBeau had been attracted to a man, Remy liked men as well as women.

Recalling that Charles had asked him to get the first aid kit, he gently lowered Remy on to the bed and slipped away from underneath the Cajun's head. "I'll be back in a second." He quickly left the room, needing a moment to sort out his thoughts.

Until recently he had never given much thought to bisexuality. He had always liked girls, well, sometimes he also checked out a guy, but he had never taken the next step. He liked girls, not men! He didn't even like LeBeau in that way... or did he?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy sat upright, keeping his eyes locked on the floor. He couldn't face Charles right now. Not now the professor knew one of his darkest secrets. "I'd really prefer to leave."

Charles shook his head. "We all make mistakes, Remy. That's why there are second chances."

"I don't get second chances, never have." Remy shrugged his shoulders.

"Do you want to tell me what happened between Sinister and you?"

Remy sighed. "I was young, and he gave me lots of attention. I thought it was the real thing. I needed someone to love, to love me back and I didn't ask any questions."

"Did you know who Sinister was?"

"Non. When I meet him he looked like a twenty year old. He called himself Nathan and I didn't know something was wrong. During the first few months everything was just fine but then he got possessive and I felt like a prisoner when he was around so I wanted out. I left... A few days later my powers went berserk and I ended up contacting Sinister, hoping he could help me control my powers. He performed brain surgery on me and my powers were back under control."

"How did you find out that Sinister and Nathan were one and the same person?"

"One night Sinister came on to me. I told him that I wasn't interested, but he wouldn't take no for an answer. He got angry and suddenly I was looking at Nathan. That was when I realized that I had been played." Remy peeked at Charles. The professor's glance was compassionate and filled with understanding.

"I still wanted out and I tried to leave. That's when he sent me into the Morlock's tunnels. By then he must have realized that he couldn't change my mind. It's like he just said, if he can't have me, no one else will. He instructed Creed to kill me, and Creed left me for dead, but I survived. Some policemen found me and called in an ambulance." Emotionally exhausted, he closed his eyes again.

"That's why I didn't want you in my head, monsieur. I was afraid you'd find out the truth and shun me for it. If the others ever find out... then I'm history."

Charles understood Remy's fear. "I won't tell them, but we have to deal with Sinister. If he's really that obsessed with you we must find a way to stop him because he won't give up."

Remy laughed bitterly. "He'll find another way to get under my skin."

"I want you to stay at the mansion, Remy."

"I ain't sure I can do that," whispered Remy apologetically. "Too many bad vibes. Bets, Wings... Rogue... They don't want me around."

"They will have to deal with it. I'm not handing you to Sinister on a silver plate." Charles was convinced that Sinister would try again and he wanted the Cajun at the mansion where the security system would kick in should Sinister try to get to Remy.

"Hum?" Bobby cleared his throat, announcing his presence. His head was still reeling with Remy's revelations. He walked to the bed, put the first aid kit on the nightstand and waited for Charles' instructions.

"Bobby, disinfect the wound and bandage it again. I need to use Cerebro to locate Sinister." He steered his hover chair to the doorway and left, leaving Remy in Bobby's capable hands.

Bobby carefully gathered Remy's arm close and disinfected the wound. "This will hurt."

"Just do it..." The slight stinging was nothing compared to the pain he had become used to. Bobby was gentle and he appreciated that. Within minutes Bobby had the wound bandaged again.

"Now what? Are you staying?" Bobby put the first aid kit away and pulled Remy's sleeve down.

"I'd better check on my room. It was a mess the last time I saw it." Remy didn't want to leave the bed. He felt safe with Bobby.

"You can stay here if you want," offered Bobby shyly, averting his eyes.

Remy stared at him. "Are you sure?" Mon Dieu, having company was his greatest desire.

"Yeah... " Bobby gave Remy a shy look, relieved to see the Cajun smile. "That's a deal then." He didn't need to hear the words to know Remy's answer.

Remy grinned. "It's a deal, we're gonna be roommates!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bobby felt a little awkward, suddenly having a roommate, but he was determined to make the best of it. "What do you wanna do with dinner? Eat downstairs or...?"

"I'd rather not go downstairs," admitted Remy gingerly. Except for Bobby and Charles no one knew he was around and he didn't want to run in to anyone, especially Warren, Betsy and Rogue in particular. "I should return to the boathouse." He sat on the bed, staring at the floor while nervously wringing his hands. "I don't wanna be a bother."

"You're not! Hey, I invited you to stay, remember? I wouldn't do that when I didn't want you here." Bobby wasn't sure how to deal with Remy's depressed mood. "So you want me to get us something to eat? Are you hungry?"

"Not really," sighed Remy. What he could really use was a shower and a new set of clothes, but he didn't dare head for his room.

"What?" Bobby noticed the frown on Remy's brow.

"Could you get some things from my room?"

"Sure." Bobby smiled. "What do you need, except for the obvious?"

"Just some clothes, maybe a few books? It looks like I'm gonna be cooped up here for some time and... I haven't had a chance to read in such a long while."

"Sinister?" Bobby studied Remy closely. The deadly paleness was retreating from the Cajun's face and the gleam of insanity had left the alien eyes. Remy looked better.

"Oui, he was always there, whispering. It's strange, the silence. I need to get used to it again."

Bobby recalled Remy's earlier confession of Sinister and he being lovers. He would love to ask the Cajun some personal questions, but couldn't. Remy didn't know that he had overheard the telepathic exchange with Charles. "Sure, I'll get you some books. I hope you don't mind me watching cartoons... It's a tradition." He always tuned in to the cartoons at ten PM.

Remy smiled weakly. "I don't mind." He was more than grateful that Bobby allowed him to stay. He wasn't sure he could go back to the loneliness of the boathouse.

"All right then. I'm going to fetch us some dinner and the things you need from your room. Why don't you already start that shower? Towels are in the bathroom and you can use my shampoo, no problem."

"Merci," said Remy, suddenly wondering why Bobby was this friendly, but no, Drake didn't have a hidden agenda, at least he hoped not. For once in his life he hoped he had found someone who wanted to help without wanting something in return. Maybe he was fooling himself, but then again, what was life without hope?

Bobby left the room and Remy headed for the bathroom, which was surprisingly tidy. He had always thought Bobby would be messy, but everything was spotless. He undressed, dropping his ripe clothes to the floor. He had burst out in to a cold sweat when the professor had entered his mind and the stench still clung to him.

He stepped beneath the spray and let the warm water cascade down his body. The warmth felt good. Mentally exhausted, he leaned against the wall, resting his forehead against the tiles. Where would he have been without Bobby and Charles interfering? Probably in hell with Sinister as his own personal nemesis tormenting him.

When he had looked in to Charles' eyes he hadn't seen any disgust, which was amazing. After all, the professor had just learned that Sinister had used him, used him as his personal whore, but back then it hadn't felt like that. He had thought he had found true love with Nathan. What a joke. The man had only used him for his personal satisfaction.

Shivering, he switched off the water, grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his dripping hair. Next, he used another towel to dry his skin. Merde, the bandage had gotten wet and needed to be changed. He could do that himself.

He slung a towel around his waist and headed for the bedroom. He picked up the med kit from the table and sat down, staring at the wound, which had sealed. The urge to scratch it open again overwhelmed him, he wanted to see the blood flow again. He rubbed the wound with his fingers, his nails ready to dig in to his flesh, but then the door opened and Bobby walked inside, balancing a tray and carrying a duffle bag filled with his personal stuff.

"What are you doing, Remy?" Bobby frowned. He hoped Remy was merely redressing the wound and not dabbing it open.

"Changing the bandage," whispered Remy in a choked tone. Now that Bobby had returned, he couldn't follow through and quickly redressed the wound.

"Here are some clothes. Get decent, man." Bobby threw Remy the duffle bag. "But don't take too long or else dinner will get cold."

Remy caught the bag and disappeared into the bathroom. Briefly he stared at his reflection in the mirror, surprised at the lucid expression in his eyes. Yes, he was feeling better, more in control. He quickly dressed in jeans and a T-shirt and put on warm socks so his feet wouldn't grow cold. Within three minutes he joined Bobby again, who had placed the tray on his desk, after shoving his papers and action figures aside.

"I hope you're hungry! Jean made turkey, baked potatoes and greens. Dig in, man."

Remy sat down and stared at the food. He wasn't so sure that his stomach would appreciate eating dinner, but he had to try. Bobby had gone through all this trouble to get him some food and clean clothes.

"I also brought some books. Man, I didn't know you had such a collection! Almost every book I looked at was a first edition! They must be valuable." Bobby was almost halfway through emptying his plate while Remy hadn't taken a bite yet. "Come on, Jean's a good cook. Give it a try."

Remy sighed, but complied. After the first bite he had to admit that Bobby was right. "Tastes good."

Bobby shot Remy a quick glance. "Scott asked about you."

Remy's eyes widened. "He doesn't know I'm here, does he?"

"I think he does. I don't know how. I didn't tell him and I'm the professor didn't mention it either. But Scott wanted to know how you were doing. We were alone and..."

"What did you tell him, Bobby?"

"That you were doing better. I didn't mention Sinister, or the professor helping you." A restless expression appeared in Remy's eyes. "Come on, Remy, you can't hide forever."

In his heart Remy knew Bobby was right, but he wasn't ready yet to reveal himself, not when Sinister was still battering against his shields. Although Sinister could no longer talk to him in his mind, he still felt Sinister hover at the edges of his mind. Sinister would never give up, but Bobby and the professor didn't know that yet. This was only a temporary reprieve; Sinister would eventually come for him.

"Remy?" Bobby worried about the lost look on Remy's face. At least the Cajun had eaten half of his dinner.

Remy remained quiet, pushed his plate away and stared listlessly ahead of him. The thought that Sinister merely needed to open a tesseract to get to him made him feel queasy.

"What is it? I can tell you're brooding..." Bobby refused to give up. He would make Remy open up to him.

"It's Sinister," escaped Remy unintended. Merde, he didn't want Bobby to worry about his problems. Drake had already helped him enough.

Bobby nodded encouragingly. "Yes?"

"Nothing stops him from coming to get me." Remy closed his eyes briefly. "He's strong, homme. The mansion's defenses don't stop him."

"But the X-Men can!" Bobby sounded confident and he gave Remy a reassuring smile.

"Ai, homme, you don't really think that, do you?" He hated to kill Bobby's dreams and hopes.

"We're strong enough! Scott can kick Sinny's ass! He's done it before!" Bobby nodded enthusiastically, but the depressed look on Remy's face made him frown. "What? You don't believe he can take on Sinny? Sinister fears that optic blast!"

"Bobby, homme..." Remy nervously licked his lips. "You can't think they'll defend me! Be honest, most team members can't stand me or hate my guts... Especially since Antarctica." Disillusioned Remy got to his feet and walked over to the window. "They'll be glad to be rid of me... Why do you think I was living at the boathouse?"

"That's not true!" Bobby rose as well and joined the Cajun at the window. "Hank still feels guilty for leaving you and Scott... Well, I got the impression he's kinda worried about you. He's been having trouble sleeping lately and you might be the reason for that. He's worried, Remy, true."

Remy didn't buy it. "Even if that's true, that's only two people, the rest don't want me here."

"I want you here," whispered Bobby shyly. Remy averted his eyes, looking outside and Bobby bit his bottom lip. Stupid! Why did you have to say that! Now you made him uncomfortable.

"I believe you..." Remy cautiously made eye contact. "And that means a lot to me."

"And then there's Jean, and the professor... I'm sure they want you here." Bobby did his best to cover his shyness. "And I'm sure Logan won't let Sinny get his hands on you. That's half of the team, if not more."

Remy managed a weak smile. "Merci, Bobby." It had been ages since someone had tried to make him feel good.

Bobby cleared his throat. Was he imagining things or was there some sort of tension building between them? Uh-huh, this wasn't good. He was starting to feel as shy as a schoolboy. What the hell was going on? Trying to create some distance between them, he moved to the bed, switched on the TV and tuned in to his daily dose of cartoons. "There are also some books in the duffle bag." Looking at the tray he decided to take it to the kitchen tomorrow.

Remy nodded. He had felt the odd tension himself and it had him puzzled. He rummaged through the bag and found his first edition of David Copperfield. It was the first book poppa had ever read to him when he had been a child. Not wanting to infringe on Bobby's personal space, he tried to make himself comfortable on the window sill, pulling up his legs and leaning back for support.

Bobby watched silently. He loved sitting in the window sill and reading like that. It looked like they had more in common than he had ever imagined.

His thoughts continued to drift away from the cartoons. They drifted back to Remy. "Can I ask you something?"

Remy startled slightly and looked up from his book. "What do you wanna know?"

"Why did you move to the boathouse? No one made you."

Yes, that was true. No one had ordered him to leave the mansion. Remy moistened his lips and stared ahead of him. "I didn't feel comfortable here, still don't. I don't belong here. I don't have the right to be here, not after..." His openness stunned him. Why was he telling Bobby these things?

"Why didn't you tell someone that Sinister was harassing you? Don't you trust anyone at all? No one?" Not even me?

Remy avoided looking in to Bobby's eyes, uncertain what he would find there. "I'm the traitor. I got the Morlocks killed. No one trusts me, so why should I trust anyone?"

Bobby swallowed hard. "I don't know what happened in the tunnels, but I don't believe for one second that you willingly participated in that slaughter." Please tell me you didn't, Remy.

Remy tensed. It was hard for him to talk about that time in the tunnels. "I didn't know what Creed and the Marauders were up to. Sinister told me he wanted the Morlocks for research, to lessen their misery. When I realized what was really happening, I tried to fight them off, but Creed was too strong. They left me for dead in those tunnels. I didn't want any of the Morlocks to die."

Bobby's breath caught, seeing the tears that rolled down Remy's face. "I'm so sorry."

"Non, part of the massacre is my fault. I believed Sinister when I should have known better.

Was it because they were lovers? Was that why he believed Sinister? Bobby still had trouble picturing them as a couple. Sinister was insane! What would Remy want with the maniac?

He had lost his interest in the cartoons by now and a yawn overwhelmed him. "Man, I'm tired and I didn't do a thing all day!" But it was the emotional strain that was wearing him down. Ever since finding Remy outside of his window, his world had been turned upside down. "I'm seriously considering turning in for the night."

Bobby left the bed, disappeared in to the bathroom, carrying a shirt and sweat pants with him. He figured he would play it safe and wear more clothes to bed than he usually did.

A moment later, he returned, finding Remy putting a pillow and a blanket on the floor. The Cajun had removed his jeans and was wearing a long T-shirt. "What are you doing?" Bobby frowned.

"It's your bed, homme. I'm not invading it." Remy tried to smile, but failed. He was tired as well, and he longed to crawl in to a warm and soft bed, but the only one he could crawl in to was his own and that bed was in another room. "Slept on the floor before, not a problem."

Okay, what was he going to do now? He couldn't let Remy sleep on the cold floor! "Uhm, bed's big enough for both of us. Just stay on your side and everything will be fine." Not giving Remy a chance to argue, he grabbed the pillow and blanket and deposited them back on to the bed.

"Are you sure?" Remy didn't want to impose.

"Yeah, I'm sure..." He checked the time. "I can't believe I'm turning in this early. It's only eleven!" Remy yawned and Bobby realized that the Cajun was just as tired as he was, maybe even more. "Come on, let's get some sleep."

Bobby lay down on his side of the bed and watched Remy climb in as well, staying as far as possible on his side of the bed. "This is weird, isn't it?" Maybe talking about it would make it less awkward. He had never shared a bed with a man before.

"Oui, it's weird..." Remy turned away from Bobby and curled up on his side, wanting to give Bobby as much privacy as possible.

"Night, Remy."

"Night, Bobby." Yes, this was weird! Bobby killed the lights and Remy smiled in the dark, relieved that Bobby couldn't see his burning eyes. Maybe he would be able to actually sleep tonight now that he wasn't alone.

Bobby moved, turned on to his side as well and Remy listened to Bobby's breathing for long minutes. The other man's breathing slowed down and became deeper. Bobby had fallen asleep.

Staring at the clock, he watched time tick away. Usually he would toss and turn, but now he didn't want to wake Bobby and he remained motionless. Listening to Bobby's breathing soothed him and the tension began to leave his body.

Something sharp tugged at his mind, trying to gain his attention; Sinister. Remy flinched, curled up in fetal position and concentrated on maintaining the shields Xavier had built. They held, but he could still feel Sinister behind those walls.

He'll never leave me alone. Why am I trying to fool myself? Sinister won't ever give up on me. Why did I ever get involved with Nathan? If I had known who he was, I would have run! But he had been lured in to the trap Sinister had so masterly orchestrated. He had never stood a chance.

Frozen, he barely dared to breath. What if Sinister found a way to get to him anyways? The scientist only needed to open a tesseract in this very room and could then drag him off without anyone noticing it. Bobby would probably sleep right through it.

That was it. Now he couldn't sleep anymore. He was afraid to close his eyes. Staring in to the dark room, his alien eyes showed him everything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One hour later Remy was emotionally worn down. The room revealed nothing but peace and quiet, but he knew how deceiving that could be. His eyes darted wildly, searching for a change in the air, indicating that a tesseract was being opened, but nothing happened. Mon Dieu, he couldn't hold this up much longer.

Suddenly Bobby moved again and this time the other man rolled closer toward him. Remy's heart missed a beat when Bobby raised an arm and then draped it over his waist. A quick, forceful pull and suddenly his back rested against Bobby's chest. What the...?

Bobby draped one leg over his and now held him tightly, pulling him to his chest. Remy blinked in surprise. Bobby's breath caressed his neck, causing his skin to form goose skin. Mon Dieu, what was Bobby doing?

Carefully, he looked over his shoulder. Bobby's eyes were closed and the other man's breathing indicated that he was still asleep. That explained things. Bobby was probably having a pleasant dream. Maybe he was even dreaming of Rogue. Over the years he had realized that Bobby had a crush on her, but Rogue had told him that she wasn't in the least interested in Bobby. The poor boy.

Bobby tightened his hold, sighed blissfully and buried his face in Remy's hair.

Remy didn't dare move, afraid he would wake up Bobby. Doubtlessly Bobby would be embarrassed like hell, waking up like this.

Then the situation got even more complicated. Bobby began nuzzling the back of his neck and one hand rubbed his skin through his shirt. Bobby was also growing hard and the other man's erection pressed against his ass.

Remy was growing desperate by now. Bobby would never forgive him if he woke up like this. Drake would probably assume that it was his doing. He did have a certain reputation, one which he didn't deserve. During the time that he had been dating Rogue he had always been faithful to her.

"Oh, yeah..."

A lump formed in Remy's throat. Bobby was now rubbing against him. Please don't let him wake up and blame this on me! I didn't do a thing!

Bobby's movements suddenly stopped and another sigh reached his ears. Fuck, Bobby had come in his dreams while holding him! Remy didn't know if he should be angry, relieved, curious or disappointed. Bobby had come holding him! But whom is he dreaming of? Rogue? Certainly not me!

Satiated, Bobby continued to hold Remy close, determined to hold on to the warm body, which presence even registered in his sleep.

Remy considered freeing himself of the embrace, but in the end decided against it. Bobby was asleep. Had come in his sleep. Drake wasn't using him. Maybe he should just accept this warmth, this closeness and use it to get some decent sleep. He could worry about Bobby finding out in the morning.

He pressed back against Bobby, who sighed pleased. The arms around him tightened and he swore Drake just pressed a kiss on to his shoulder. He almost hoped that Bobby would whisper a name, his name, but that was wishful thinking. Bobby was interested in girls, not men, and certainly not a nutcase like him!

Giving up his search for the forming tesseract, he closed his eyes and let his mind drift. He was always conscious of Sinister's presence, but now that Bobby was close, he felt safe and sheltered. Sinister couldn't get to him now that he was in Bobby's arms. Drake would notice Sinister's arrival and help him flee.

Now that he was safe he could finally sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first beams of sunlight reached his face and warmed him. Remy reluctantly peeked through half closed eyelids. Bobby had forgotten to close the curtains before turning in last night.

Speaking of Bobby... Bobby still lay spooned behind him, holding him tight in his sleep. Remy indulged himself and enjoyed being held like this.

Over the years he'd had several lovers; men and women. He had been happy with Belle, until he had been forced to flee New Orleans. Then Nathan had appeared and one year of complete happiness had followed.

Then reality had kicked in and he had stared Sinister in the eyes. Seeing him morph in to Nathan had killed something inside him. For one year he had thought that Nathan loved him. Now he knew he had been in love with an illusion and their love had never existed.

Sinister had never forced him, but had tried to seduce him in Nathan's guise. But he had denied Sinister, hurt and disappointed that Sinister was only interested in playing games.

Rogue had then taken her place as his lover and they had been happy for a short while, but then the obstacles had appeared. She didn't trust him completely, accusing him of keeping things from her. Of course he kept things from her! He didn't want her to know about Sinister/Nathan, and the way the scientist had tricked him in to betraying the Morlocks.

Things had quickly gone downhill. Rogue had started to distance herself from him and then she absorbed part of his memory, which caused her to leave him in Antarctica.

It had been cold then. Cold and deserted. He had resorted to chewing the metal wires, hoping it would sustain him, kindle the kinetic fire, but it hadn't worked. Days later he had been close to death. Hunger and cold killing him slowly and then Sinister had appeared, offering him a deal.

Remy vividly recalled the bitter offer. "Be my lover again and I will save you."

Why had he ever accepted? Because he had wanted to live. He hadn't been ready yet to die. So he had given in to Sinister, promised the scientist whatever he wanted and Sinister had taken him to his lab and had nursed him back to health.

One day, Sinister came to him to collect and he refused to pay his debt, to keep up his end of the bargain. Sinister had been furious, had threatened him, but never forced him. He knew how important it was to Sinister that he came willingly and that was the one thing he would never do.

It had taken him several attempts to flee Sinister's lab, but in the end he succeeded and found a way out. Then the terrible whispering had started. Sinister's mind crossed the distance between them and began harassing him. The voice never faltered, never left and it had been his constant companion for the last six months.

And now everything was quiet inside his mind. Peace... bliss... And all that thanks to Bobby.

Bobby... Remy peeked over his shoulder. Drake was still asleep and for an Iceman, he radiated an awful lot of heat. Not that he minded, he hated being cold.

Bobby... What had possessed Bobby to reach out and hold him like this? All through the night Bobby had held on to him, never letting go.

Merde, how would Bobby react when finding him in his arms? And even worse... What would Bobby do, realizing he had come in his sleep, holding him like that. Would Bobby freak out? Blame him? Tell him to leave? Mon Dieu, he didn't want to leave!

"Hum... Morning, love..." Bobby was starting to wake up, but wasn't in a hurry. The warm body in his arms felt too good.

Remy tensed completely. Love? What was that about? Bobby was probably not fully awake yet and lost in the last remnants of his sleep.

"Yeah..." Bobby smiled, inhaled the spicy scent and loved the way the hair tickled his nose... Huh? Spicy scent? What? His eyes flashed open in horror. "What...?" At first he didn't understand what had happened, then he realized Remy was in his arms and even worse, he had a tight hold on the Cajun. Fuck, what had happened last night?

His panic grew worse realizing that his boxers clung to his body for a reason. He'd had a wet dream and during the night he had come! He had come with Remy in his arms. Fuck, he was in big trouble! How was he going to explain this to Remy?

Realizing that Remy was looking over his shoulder, Bobby met the alien eyes, reading the surprise in them. What could he do to save the situation? Shit, he had really messed up. Now what?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy literally felt Bobby's distress and shock. Bobby was freaking out and he had to do something quick. "Bobby, you had a nice dream, that happens. Don't make a big deal outta it." But it was a big deal, at least for him it was. Last night he had felt secure and sheltered for the first time in months and when Bobby had called him love by accident, an absurd hope had blossomed inside him. But no, Bobby didn't care about him in that way. "Just a dream, bien?"

Bobby leapt on to Remy's explanation, grabbing it like a lifeline. "Yeah, that's it, just a dream. Oh, Remy, I'm so sorry." Realizing that he still had his arms around the Cajun he quickly let go and pulled back. He almost fell out of bed, but managed to land on his feet. For some reason his knees were wobbly. Ashamed, he grabbed one of the blankets and covered up his groin area with it. The fact that he had come really embarrassed him and why didn't he remember a thing about the dream he'd had? It had made him come, so why had he forgotten about it? That didn't make any sense!

Shuffling his feet, Bobby peeked at Remy, who sat upright in bed, watching him. "Are we okay? I didn't ruin this, did I? Our friendship, I mean." God, he was rambling!

Remy smiled reassuringly. "We're bien, Bobby." He understood that Bobby was somewhat shaken, but there was no reason to freak out about it. In order to calm down Bobby, he had to radiate calm and understanding.

Bobby calmed slowly, wishing the floor would open and swallow him. He wanted to hide and never face Remy again! "I'm really sorry..."

Remy remained where he was, realizing Bobby needed his personal space. "Don't worry about it, homme. Could have happened to me too."

Bobby quickly nodded his head, glad that Remy was letting him off this easily. "I'd better take a shower..." He dashed in to the bathroom and closed the door behind him. Man, that had been so embarrassing! How could that have happened during the night? Feeling a warm body close had probably triggered it, but he still felt ashamed.

He stepped beneath the spray, and shivered, as icy cold water dripped down his spine. The cold water startled him really awake. Until a moment ago he had been living in a prolonged dream. Man, he hadn't even asked Remy if he had misbehaved. Had he put the moves on Remy during the night? How could he ever face Remy again?

After stepping out of the cabin, he dried his hair and skin. Damn it, he had forgotten to bring some clothes with him! He couldn't walk out there naked! Slinging a towel around his hips wouldn't do either, making him feel way too exposed. He only had one option left.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy used Bobby's absence to slip into jeans and a sweater, which he pulled from his duffle bag. Staring out of the window, he shivered. The sky had suddenly darkened. A fierce wind was blowing and slamming heavy raindrops against the window. An angry grey sky had swallowed the sun, which had shone brightly when he had woken. If Storm had been present at the mansion he would have thought it was her doing, but Storm was in Africa.

Head bowed, he pressed his still healing arm against his chest. Purposefully, he pushed the sleeve past the bandage and loosened it. The wound was healing nicely. The last time he had tried to re-open it, Bobby had entered. Now Bobby was in the bathroom and wouldn't disturb him.

Alone again and depressed by this morning's events, he pushed a nail under the crust, lifting it and ripping it away. The wound started to bleed again and he sighed. Hearing the word 'love' from Bobby's lips had briefly sparkled his hope that someone loved him in spite of all his mistakes. He had been fooling himself, as always.

Bobby was in love with Rogue and that dream had probably featured her. Would Bobby make a move now that Rogue was available again? Bobby had no idea what he was getting himself in to. Rogue was high maintenance and she had never learned to trust and love unconditionally. That was one reason why their relationship had been doomed from the start.

His arm throbbed, distracting him and he sighed, applying a new bandage. He didn't want Bobby to see what he had done.

"Uh, Remy? Could you do me a favor?"

Bobby's voice startled him. He quickly pulled down his sleeve, hiding the bandage once more and composed himself. "Oui?"

"Could you get me some clothes? I forgot to bring them along. Jeans and a shirt are fine."

Remy looked at the closet and cupboards. "No problem." He hated going through Bobby's things, and luckily located the jeans quickly. A shirt fell into his hands when a pile collapsed. He bent down to pick up some socks and stared at Bobby's pile of boxers. A smile broke through on his face, selecting the boxers adorned with a roaring Hulk.

He pushed the bathroom door ajar and placed everything on the floor, never looking at the shower cabin. "It's all here, homme."

"Thanks, Remy."

Remy closed the door again and started to pace Bobby's room. He felt trapped and confined. Yes, he could climb down the wall again and return to the boathouse, but then he would be alone again and he had sort of promised Charles to stay at the mansion. In an effort to distract himself, he made the bed and opened the window to air the place. A knock on the door took him by surprise. Should he get it or pretend no one was in?

"Remy, can you get that?"

Merde, Bobby had heard the knock! Remy sighed and walked over to the door.

"Bobby? I know Remy's in there with you. Come on, guys, open up. I want to talk to you, Remy."

Merde! It was Scott! What was Cyke doing here? Realizing that there was no way out, Remy opened the door. "Cyke?"

"So I was right! You're here!" Scott marched in to the room and studied Remy from top to toe. He didn't like what he saw. The Cajun looked badly out of a shape. "No, no one told me. I just added up everything I knew," said Scott, seeing the question in Remy's eyes.

Remy sighed. "What do you want, Cyke?"

"I want to talk to you." Scott closed the door and stared at Remy. "I don't know what's going on and I hate being kept in the dark, but I respect that you don't want to confide in me. That's your decision, but Remy, are you in any kind of danger?"

"Why would you ask that?" Remy's eyes narrowed. Great, now Bobby joined them as well. He bet they would team up against him!

"Mainly because you're not staying in your own room. I was wondering why you'd move in with Bobby. There has to be a reason for that and I bet I won't like it." Scott caught Remy's flinch. Bull's eye, he was right. Something was wrong! "I wish the professor told me what's up, but he won't, only with your permission."

Bobby's frown made Remy swallow hard. He knew what was coming.

"You know, Remy," started Bobby, "Scott's got a point. Maybe if you tell him what's going on he'll be able to help. Remember what I told you about his optic blast? Scott can kick his ass."

"His?" Scott arched an eyebrow. "Who's he?" He locked eyes with Remy, who seemed uncomfortable. "I can update the mansion's security if I know who I'm trying to keep out." On some level it hurt that Remy didn't trust him to help when he was in danger, but then again, he had never given Remy a reason to trust him in these kind of situations. "I only want to help."

Bobby nodded his head. "It's your call, Remy." He hoped Remy would accept the help. Remy might think he could do everything on his own, but he needed help against Sinister.

"Who am I looking for?" asked Scott, hoping to convince Remy to give him the benefit of the doubt. "Please, Remy."

The 'please' worked. Scott had never said that to him before. He lowered his eyes and stared at the floor, unable to stand Scott's stare. "Sinister."

"Sinister? That bastard...?" Scott's voice trailed off. "What does he want?" Sinister was a foe he knew only too well. The scientist had made his life hell as well. He felt sympathetic, honestly wanting to help Remy. "Sinister's my enemy as well."

Remy sighed relieved. "It's Sinister..." He didn't feel up to telling Scott more. This had to do.

"You might want to increase security, Slim," added Bobby. "Sinister will try to get inside the house." He hoped he hadn't crossed a line by revealing that to Scott. "Trust me, Sinister means business and we have to look out for tesseracts forming inside the mansion."

Scott nodded once. "I'll get started on it right away. The professor knows?" He looked at Remy.

"Oui, he knows..." Remy averted his eyes, overwhelmed by Scott's emotions, which were flowing over him. The walls Charles had built were designed to keep out Sinister, but other people's emotions still got past them. He needed to work on that later. Now Scott's were washing through him and he was surprised to find out just how worried Scott was. He hadn't given Scott enough credit in the past. He had always thought that Scott merely acted concerned because he was team leader, but now he realized that the concern was real and not an act. That surprised him.

"You can find me in the control room if you need me," said Scott, addressing Remy in particular. "Sinister played a rather big part in my life as well, so if you want to talk..."

The offer stunned Remy, but his empathy told him Scott was sincere. "Merci," he whispered eventually, feeling awkward.

"I'll be on my way then..."

Was he imagining things or was Scott stalling? Remy frowned. Why would Scott stall? Scott shuffled his feet and then left. Remy turned to Bobby. "What was that about?"

"He cares, Remy," said Bobby deadpanned. "He's only human. I know Scott's not popular but he's a rock. You can count on him when you need him."

"I'm beginning to see that..." He might have judged too quickly in the past as well.

"So what are we gonna do all day long?" Bobby grinned, seeing the bed had already been tidied. "Bored already?"

"Maybe," admitted Remy.

"Lemme contact the professor and see if he wants to talk to you again. Maybe we can go for a walk?" Remy looked like he needed the fresh air and the exercise.

Remy mutely nodded and sat down on the window sill once more. His book was still lying there and he picked it up, starting to read again.

Bobby called the professor's study and talked to Xavier. After ending the conversation, he looked at Remy. "He wants to see you after dinner."

"I'll be there," said Remy listlessly. He dropped the book to the floor and stared outside. "It stopped raining..."

"Great, that means we won't get wet." Bobby rummaged in Remy's duffle bag and came up with a pair of boots. "Put them on. We're going for a walk."

"Don't wanna. It's cold and wet outside." Remy shivered. "I'm fine right here."

"Come on, the fresh air will do you good." Bobby put on his boots and gathered his coat. "You can't hide in here forever."

Merde! Bobby knew why he didn't want to leave the room. What if they ran in to Warren or Rogue? That wouldn't be a pleasant confrontation.

"We need to get you a coat... Come on, Remy." Bobby slipped in to his coat, opened the door and waited for Remy to start moving.

"You're stubborn..." whispered Remy while putting on his boots. He almost yelped softly when his arm protested the movement. He hadn't had the time to properly disinfect it and a small part of him hoped it would get infected. The pain would keep him from brooding. Seeing Bobby standing there, something inside him softened. Bobby was trying so hard to help that it would be ungrateful not to comply.

"Let's go." Bobby headed for Remy's room. "Get your coat, Cajun."

Remy complied, slipped into his long trench coat and returned.

"Are you sure that coat is warm enough?" Bobby frowned. "How about a parka?"

"This is bien, homme." Remy followed Bobby's lead, but continued to hope that Bobby would abort his plans and head back to his room, but he had no such luck.

"Ah, Robert, did you enjoy the Twinkies?"

Remy cursed privately as Hank walked up to them. He had hoped they wouldn't run in to anyone.

"Hank, what the hell were you thinking? No way I can eat that Twinkie mountain."

"Maybe Remy can help?" Hank managed to get a clear look at Remy. "Remy, it's been a while..."

Remy cringed. "Sorry, Henri, but I've been busy..." Busy with isolating and hurting himself until Bobby had broken that vicious circle.

"I scheduled your annual check up tomorrow morning, Remy. Please come to the medlab at eight."

Remy started to tremble and that worried Bobby. The Cajun wouldn't pass the medical exam and Hank would put him on the inactive list. And was that such a bad thing? Remy needed some down time. Maybe making it official would help. "I'll make sure he's there at eight."

Remy shot Bobby an irritated glance. Why was Bobby making his decisions for him? "Can't we reschedule, Henri?"

"No, the rules are clear on that. An X-Men needs to pass that test at any given time, Remy." Hank seemed determined.

Remy sighed, realizing he didn't stand a chance against them. Hank would never let him pass in his current condition. "I'll be there."

"Great, and now, Robert, I'm off to have breakfast."

Bobby had planned to have something to eat before heading outside, but looking at Remy he realized that the Cajun wasn't up to more confrontations. "We'll see you tomorrow morning."

Hank left and Bobby steered Remy toward the front door. "Let's get out of here. We can have breakfast at the boathouse, there's less company."

Remy wholeheartedly agreed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few minutes later Remy had to agree that Bobby had been right about the fresh air and exercise. He was starting to feel better, more awake and alive. They were heading for the boathouse and Bobby had fallen in to step beside him. Bobby was happily chattering away about New Zealand and his hope that they could have a look at the travel guides this afternoon.

"You know, Remy, I really think you'd enjoy exploring the country, to get away from Westchester, the X-Men, everything going on in your life. Why don't you wanna come with me?" Bobby locked eyes with a reluctant Cajun who tried to look away. "We can wait until we dealt with Sinister and then leave. Just think about it?" Bobby gave Remy a hopeful look.

"I don't know, homme." A part of him wanted to tag along, but yet another part wanted to avoid all contact. Bobby didn't push and he appreciated that.

"I love it, the way everything smells after it rained," said Bobby happily. He was in a good mood today. A support group was forming around Remy and the Cajun probably didn't even know it. Charles would work with Remy on the empathy and Scott was keeping an eye out for Sinister. Hank would doubtlessly find a way to deal with Remy's medical problems and it was his job to distract the Cajun from his problems.

They had reached the boathouse by now and Bobby followed Remy inside. They headed for the kitchen where Remy switched on the coffeemaker and Bobby busied himself pulling food items from Remy's well stuffed shelves. A few minutes later they were drinking coffee and happily munching away.

Bobby kept a close eye on Remy and found that a little bit of color was returning to the Cajun's face. Having company was doing wonders for Remy. Now he had to try to make Remy open up to him once more. "Can't have been easy, living here on your own with Sinister in your head."

Remy's knife dropped on to his plate with a loud thud. His eyes briefly sought out Bobby's. Why was Drake addressing this now?

"How did you do it? How did you stay sane?"

"Who says I'm sane?" Remy stared at his plate, unable to look at Bobby.

Bobby arched an eyebrow. "Well, who's sane these days? Join the crowd. I've been accused of some insane behavior, like trying to eat ten Twinkies at once. You wouldn't believe the mess I made..." Bobby smiled warmly. "Speaking of Twinkies, do you like them? I still got hundreds of them and Hank expects me to eat them all."

Remy managed a weak smile in return. "That's lots of sugar."

"You look like you could use lots of sugar," said Bobby, playing dirty. Remy chuckled softly and Bobby definitely liked the sound. There had been a time when Remy had chuckled and laughed like that all the time. That seemed years ago. Sipping his coffee, another shock coursed through him. "Man, that coffee is evil!" It would raise the dead!

"Glad you approve," teased Remy, giving Bobby a hesitant smile. The friendly banter felt so good, so warm and he realized that Bobby's emotions had made it past his defenses. That must be why he was starting to feel warm and happy as well. His first thought was to push those emotions away, but they felt way too good and he pulled them even closer, enjoying the moment.

Bobby noticed Remy's relaxed expression and grinned. "What do you wanna do the rest of the day?"

"I don't know..." Honestly? Sleep. He wanted to crawl back in to bed, pull up the covers and sleep all day long.

"Let's take it easy today. You know, watch some TV, read, look at the travel guides, talk, maybe even take a nap?" Bobby saw the pleased expression in Remy's eyes and knew he had made the right decision. "You like that idea, don't you?"

"Oui, sounds bien..." He had never thought he would enjoy Bobby's presence this much, but he did. "You're okay with me invading your home like that? Maybe I should head for my own room." Privately he cringed. Being alone in his room would drive him insane.

"I'm fine with you staying, Remy. I like the company." Bobby leaned back and finished his coffee. "Do you want to take anything with you from the boathouse? I don't know when we'll come back again."

Remy got to his feet and searched the living room for some of his CD's. Looking over his shoulder, he found that Bobby was putting their plates in the sink. "I can do that later," he offered.

"It's not a problem. Just get your stuff, Remy."

Remy picked up a plastic bag and began stuffing his things in to it. The last item he collected from the bedroom. It was a picture, showing Mattie, Jean-Luc, Henri an he, all standing in the living room. His family... The family who had deserted him in the end. He didn't really blame Jean-Luc for banishing him, knowing that his father's hands had been tied, but what really hurt was that neither Mattie nor Jean-Luc had kept in contact with him. The phone calls had gotten less frequent and then stopped. Maybe they had heard about the massacre and drawn their own conclusions?

His shoulders slumped forward. The loneliness crept up on him again and one fingertip began to glow with kinetic energy. Determinedly, he pressed it against the inside of his wrist, scorching his flesh. The foul stench of burned flesh invaded his nostrils and he hated himself for doing this. But it worked. The hurt his family had caused him was fading now.

"Remy, what the hell are you doing!" Bobby hurried in to the room, knelt in front of Remy and gently took hold of the Cajun's wrist. "Don't tell me this was another accident."

Remy flinched when Bobby's fingers touched his skin. He wanted to yell at Bobby to leave the room and to leave him alone, but the words got stuck in his throat. Bobby's touch was gentle, caring and the concern emanating from Bobby's mind made him feel like a bastard for scaring the other man like that. "It's just a burn."

"Just a burn?" Bobby pushed back his anger, knowing the empath wouldn't deal well with feeling it. He could yell at Remy later when his emotions weren't that strong. "Why? Why are you doing this?" Using his mutant powers, he created a film of ice on top of the burn, cooling it. "Why are you hurting yourself?"

Remy wanted to pull back his arm, but Bobby refused to let him go. Anger, fear and hope were waging a fierce battle.

"Remy? Why?" Bobby closely monitored the burn. He needed a first aid kit, but he didn't dare leave Remy alone right now. "What was it?"

The questions and concern got to Remy and he caved in. Trembling, he showed Bobby the picture that had brought on his emotional outburst.

"Who are they?" Bobby sighed relieved now that Remy was trying.

Remy pointed at Mattie. "She was like a mother to me. I don't know my real parents, but Mattie took on that responsibility. She raised me, together with Jean-Luc. I was a handful."

"Who's this?"

"That's Henri, my brother, but he's dead..."

Bobby didn't know what to do next. "Where are they now?" Maybe he could contact them and ask them to be there for Remy?

"New Orleans..." Memories flooded his mind, good and bad ones. "Lived there my entire life."

"Why did you leave?" Bobby changed his position and sat down on the bed. Kneeling on the hard floor was bad for his knees.

"I was kicked out..." Remy continued to stare at the picture. "Can't believe I'm telling you this, homme."

Bobby nodded. "You're a private person, Remy. You talk a lot, but seldom about yourself. Thanks for telling me." He spotted a first aid kit beneath the bed and pulled it toward him. "So why the burn?"

"Thinking about them hurt so bad. I want to be with them, but I can't. I feel..." His voice deserted him, unable to form the words that revealed his solitude.

"You're lonely," finished Bobby for him. "I understand that. I wish my parents were close, but they're not."

"But you can go and visit them." Remy allowed Bobby to put some soothing ointment on the burn.

"You still didn't answer my question, Remy. Why burn yourself?"

"It makes the pain go away..." Merde, had he really said that aloud? Fuck! Acting on instinct, he leapt to his feet to flee the room, but Bobby reacted just as fast.

"No, Remy, stay. You came to me because you couldn't deal with the loneliness. Now don't run away again."

They stood facing each other and Remy was surprised to find just how strong Bobby's hold on him was. Bobby refused to let go of his arm, keeping him close. "I've been running for years..."

"Then it's time to stop running." Bobby smiled warmly. "You're already opening up to me, Remy. Now let me help."

"I ain't sure I can." Bobby's next move utterly stunned him. Bobby suddenly pulled him close for a hug! His body tensed, but his mind welcomed the closeness, the friendship offered. After a moment's hesitation, he rested his head on Bobby's shoulder and to his eternal shame tears built in his eyes, which flowed freely over his face. He held on to Bobby, swaying on his feet.

"It's gonna be all right, Remy. I promise." Touched by Remy's acceptance, Bobby rubbed the Cajun's back. "You don't have to do this alone."

"I've always been alone..." Remy sobbed softly, ashamed that he was falling apart in front of a team-mate.

Bobby continued to hold him, whispered soft reassurances and wondered why the hell holding Remy felt so good. He never wanted to let go again. Horrified, he realized he was growing hard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bobby abruptly moved away from Remy, releasing the Cajun from the embrace as if burned. Turning away, he tried to figure out what was happening. "Shit, Remy, I..."

Bobby's rejection hit Remy hard. His hair fell in front of his face, hiding his upset expression. He had a pretty good idea what was going on, but didn't want to confront Bobby with his bisexuality, which Drake had always successfully hidden from himself. It was time to take the blame; maybe it would reassure Bobby and save their friendship. "Sorry, mon ami, my fault."

Bobby spun around. "Your fault?" His eyes narrowed, seeing unshed tears swimming in the alien eyes.

"Must be the empathy..." He hoped Bobby would buy it, because he had no idea how to explain a made up story in detail.

Bobby was tempted to let Remy take the blame, but couldn't. "I don't think it's your empathy." Shuffling his feet, he nervously averted his eyes. "I think it's me."

"Why'd you say that?" Remy was holding his breath. His empathy told him that Bobby had enjoyed holding him like that, and had even picked up on some affection and sexual interest during the hug, but could he tell Bobby? No, not yet.

"I... always envied you." Bobby moistened his lips, dreading what was coming next.

"Envied me?" Remy was stunned. What was there to be envious of?

"You had Rogue and I wanted her as well."

"I knew you had a crush on her," admitted Remy honestly. Bobby was standing a few feet away from him, maintaining distance and that made him ache inside. He didn't know why or how he had formed a connection with Bobby, but apparently he had. They were bonding. "If you want to pursue her, you can." But that wasn't want Bobby really wanted. The question was, did Bobby know what he wanted?

"No, I'm not interested in her anymore." Bobby drew in a deep breath and locked eyes with Remy. "I seem to be more interested in you, but I don't get it. I don't like men in that way."

Remy's heart contracted. Bobby was hiding the truth from himself. Was it his task to set him straight? "Are you sure you don't like men, Bobby?"

"What are you picking up? You're the empath here." Bobby reminded himself just in time that Remy knew better what was going on than he did.

Remy shook his head. "This ain't about me. What are you feeling, Bobby? Why react like that when holding me?"

Bobby shrugged. "I like holding you."

"Why?" Remy cursed himself for not letting this rest, but he owed Bobby. "Why do you like it?"

Bobby was beginning to feel nervous. Cold sweat poured from his pores. "I don't know."

"You can do better." Remy walked toward Bobby and came to a halt in front of him. "Hold me..."

Bobby shook his head. "That's a bad idea."

"You don't wanna find out the truth about yourself?" Remy was offering himself as part of the experiment. "It's okay if you get turned on, Bobby. I don't mind."

Bobby bit his bottom lip. "I'm not doing it." But then Remy moved quickly, pulling him in to a hug. "Remy, what..." He found himself buried in a warm hug. Remy was rubbing his back, whispering words he didn't understand. "What are you doing?" He could feel the empathy at work and that was how he knew Remy hadn't influenced him before.

"Trying to calm you down, nothing else. The rest's your feelings. What are you feeling, Bobby?"

Now that he was relaxing, Bobby had to admit that the hug felt good. "Don't know... You feel good, different."

"Different to what?"

"To a girl..." Bobby rested his head against Remy's chest and heard the other man's heartbeat. "What am I feeling, Remy? Tell me." He knew now, but he couldn't say the words. The warm body triggered a response inside his groin and the arousal returned.

"You know what you're feeling, homme. You do like men in that way. You like me in that way..." Remy had no idea what to do next.

Bobby made the decision for him. "Remy? Look at me?" His heart missed a beat, seeing defeat in Remy's eyes. "What?" But Remy shook his head and remained quiet. Was the Cajun thinking of Sinister, his ex-lover? Acting on instinct, he pulled Remy close and pressed a gentle kiss on the Cajun's soft lips.

There was no way of telling who was more surprised. Bobby for being this bold or Remy for answering the kiss. A few seconds later, Remy broke away, marching toward the doorway.

Bobby, dazed and confused, followed him. "Remy? I'm sorry! I didn't want to... Did I read you wrong? I thought..." He shut up when Remy raised a hand.

"It ain't you, Bobby. I like you," whispered Remy with his back still toward Bobby. "It's me; the mistakes I made."

"What mistakes?" Bobby wondered if Remy was talking about Sinister. "You know, I think I'm developing some feelings for you. Man, I never saw this coming, but now that I know what's going on I need to know where we stand. Do I have a chance with you, Remy? Do you like me in that way?"

Remy quickly wiped away a stray tear. "I do, but it can never be."

"Why?" Bobby walked up to Remy and remained standing behind him. He rested a hand on Remy's shoulder.

"Sinister's in my head for a reason." Chills crept up his spine, but Bobby wasn't responsible for them. Sinister was.

"Remy?" Fed up with Remy's evasive attitude, he stood in front of Remy. He cupped Remy's chin in the palm of his hand and forced the Cajun to look at him.

"Sinister and I... We have a history together... I... let him fu..."

"Don't say it." Bobby placed a finger against Remy's lips before the Cajun could end his sentence. "I'm sure he tricked you." He didn't know where that certainty came from, but it must have been a trick on Sinister's part. He couldn't imagine Remy willingly take Sinister as a lover.

Remy's knees turned weak and he ended up on his knees. Bobby went down with him, kneeling and holding him close. "I didn't know it was Sinister. He changed his appearance. He called himself Nathan and I didn't know... Would never have... I feel so used. Now he won't leave me alone."

Bobby smiled weakly. "I knew it was a trick."

"When I found out I tried to run, but ended up almost dying in the Morlock's tunnels. Sinister gave Creed instructions to wound me, but not kill me. He wanted to nurse me back to health himself, counting on me feeling thankful and staying. But the police got to me first..." Now that he was confessing everything up to Bobby he had another secret to reveal. "Sinister saved my ass at Antarctica, said he wouldn't let me die. Took me one month to recover and then another to find a way out of his lab."

"And then he started to whisper in to your mind." Everything made sense now. Bobby stared deeply into Remy's swimming eyes. "I still like you in that way. Sinister hurt you... I promise I never will."

Remy shuddered violently. "Can't believe you still want me, knowing..."

"He tricked you," said Bobby in a firm tone. "I'll never use tricks on you. What's it gonna be, Remy? Are you giving me a chance?"

Remy lowered his eyes and found that Bobby had clasped his fingers around his hands. Bobby was rubbing them gently. "I don't deserve that chance."

"You do." Bobby smiled, pushed back Remy's stray locks and caressed the Cajun's face. "I told you before that we'll do this together."

Remy shook his head. "Can't believe you..."

"Then I'll prove it to." Bobby placed another gently kiss on Remy's lips.

Remy sighed. "Bobby, I..."

"Come on, we're heading home. The professor still wants to talk to you and Hank wants you at the medlab in the morning. Maybe you can squeeze me in during the night."

Remy was lost for words. His glance traveled to the framed picture of his family. Moments ago he had felt completely miserable and only physical pain had taken away the emotional one and now he was holding a potential lover in his arms. The pain his family had caused had been pushed in to the background as Bobby forced him to face his feelings. Holding on to Bobby, he let the other man's feelings wash over him and he clung to them for dear life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Charles immediately detected a change within Remy when the Cajun sat down opposite him. "You're feeling better."

"A li'l bit." Remy shifted on the seat. Why did Charles want to talk to him?

"Are the shields keeping out Sinister?"

"Oui, monsieur. I still feel him, but I can no longer hear him."

"Good." Charles frowned. "What do we do to make him stop?"

"You can't, monsieur. He wants me, my empathy. He won't ever give up." Remy was realistic enough to realize that.

"I can't accept that." Charles considered his options. "We'll just have to work on empowering you. You're an empath, Remy. You can use that to your advantage."

"How? I don't know how to use my power." He had never received any training and when he had joined the X-Men he had kept the empathy a secret.

"Why did you keep it a secret?" Charles had accidentally caught that thought.

"I was afraid you'd think I was influencing you. Didn't wanna cause trouble." It had been hard enough as it was to fit in.

"This is what we'll do," announced Charles, "Tomorrow evening I will start training you. In the end, you'll have control over your empathy."

Remy raised an eyebrow. "Don't you think it's too late for that?"

"It's never too late to learn how to use your powers, Remy." Charles smiled. "Is there anything else you want to ask me?" Remy shook his head. "No? Then you can leave. I'm sure Robert will keep you safe."

Remy's eyes widened. Did the professor know what had happened in the boathouse? How?

"Your emotions are easy to read, Remy. That's another thing we need to work on. It's obvious you care about Robert and by the looks of it, he returns the feeling."

"You're okay with this?" Why did he find that hard to believe?

"I'm not a homophobic, Remy and I don't blame you for the massacre. I like having you here and when Robert makes you happy, I approve of it."

Remy sensed that the professor was being sincere and forced himself to accept it. He rose from the chair and walked to the doorway. He certainly hoped he wouldn't run in to Warren or Rogue.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ah, you're back! What took you so long?" Bobby signaled Remy to close the door behind him. "What did Xavier say?"

Remy shrugged. "He wants to 'train' me in using my empathy. I don't think I can ever control it like that."

Bobby noticed the depressed look in Remy's eyes and got to his feet. "Hey, what's gotten you depressed?" Remy had been smiling when they had gotten back from the boathouse. He pulled Remy over to the bed where they sat down.

"I just realized that Sinister will never give up. It ain't fair to drag you in to this. Once he knows we're... we're together... he'll target you as well."

"I can defend myself," whispered Bobby softly. "You look tired though."

Remy couldn't hide a smile. "Is that a hint? Want me in your bed, Drake?" To his surprise Bobby blushed. He hadn't thought Bobby could be this shy.

"I don't think I'm ready for anything beyond kissing..." admitted Bobby nervously, hoping he wasn't disappointing Remy. "I don't usually put out on the first date."

Remy wished he could say the same thing. When he had met Nathan, no Sinister, they had ended up in bed making love that very first night. "I ain't ready for more either." It was best to take this slow. Bobby had just admitted to himself in being interested in men and he didn't want to rush him.

"Let's cuddle up in bed with some Twinkies," said Bobby enthusiastically.

"Sounds like a plan." Remy watched Bobby remove his jeans, but the other man kept on his boxers and slipped in to a T-shirt. Taking Bobby's lead, Remy did the same.

"Is there a side of the bed which you prefer?" Bobby smiled, trying to hide his nervousness.

"Not really..." Remy felt equally nervous and when Bobby looked at him, they both started to laugh. "Merde, feel like a teenager again."

"Me too," admitted Bobby, finally getting in to bed. He used the remote to switch on the TV, while Remy settled in next to him. "This feels odd. I mean, last night was weird, but now... It has a whole new meaning."

Remy understood perfectly. "You can watch your cartoons if you wanna."

"Thanks, Remy." Bobby changed channels and found his cartoons. "Cool, it's Roadrunner."

Remy watched Bobby, who was absorbed in watching his cartoons. Although Bobby had turned thirty he didn't act older than ten, a quality which he definitely liked. Awkwardly, he moved a little closer, hoping Bobby would catch on and let him cuddle up. Bobby gave him a questioning look. "You wanna cuddle?"

"Yeah, Bobby raised one arm, pulled Remy closed and they cuddled up. "This feels nice..."

Remy agreed. He didn't want to push it but... "How about a goodnight kiss, cher?"

Wings of butterflies tickled Bobby's insides at hearing that 'cher'. "Sure, why not?" Staring in to Remy's dilated pupils, they kissed. A moment later they pulled back, neither of them ready to take the next step. Remy was content to watch Bobby while Bobby in turn watched his cartoons.

Thirty minutes later Bobby switched off the TV and the light, and after a second good night kiss, they fell in to a peaceful sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Waking up with Bobby in his arms was one of the most special experiences in his life. Remy smiled, pushed back a stray lock and studied Bobby's face, which was relaxed in sleep. They had both kept their word, had merely cuddled and kissed, which was the complete opposite of the things he used to do in bed, but he preferred cuddling with Bobby every time.

Although he had never expected it, he felt quite protective of Bobby and sometime during the night Bobby had moved in to his arms and he had happily complied, enjoying the feel of Bobby in his arms. His arms were wrapped around Bobby and one of Bobby's legs was draped over his hip. In one way this was even more intimate than making love.

Suddenly Bobby's brown eyes opened and met his. "Morning, Remy."

"Morning, cher. Did you sleep well?" He wanted to preserve this moment in time and stay here for the rest of his life.

"I slept really well, how about you?" Remy hadn't woken him up during the night, so he ruled out nightmares.

"First night of perfect sleep in my life."

Bobby blushed slightly. "We should get out of bed. Hank's expecting you and Scott scheduled a training session."

"I don't want this to end." Gingerly Remy pressed a kiss on to Bobby's forehead. "I never felt like this before."

Bobby understood. "Feels different for sure. Maybe this is the real thing?"

"I hope so..." Remy sighed blissfully, feeling Bobby's fingers massage his scalp.

"I'll walk you to the medlab after training. We can then meet up for lunch?"

Remy gave in. "Bien." But he still didn't want to leave this bed. "Cher..."

"Yeah, staying right here is tempting, but we have the evening and night to ourselves. Duty calls, huh?" Bobby realized that if he didn't get out of bed first, Remy would stay there all day. Resolutely he kicked back the covers and freed himself of Remy's embrace. "Come on, sleeping beauty, Scott's waiting."

Remy sighed, and decided and it was time to get the medical exam over with.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bobby raised an eyebrow when he walked in to the Danger Room. "Hey, Warren, how are you doing, man? Want some Twinkies?" He really needed to clean up that mountain of Twinkies in the living room.

Warren grinned. "They're all yours, Drake!" He patted Bobby on the shoulder. "How are you doing? Have you been hiding these last few days?"

Bobby took a deep breath. Warren and Remy weren't friends and he worried about Warren's reaction once his friend found out about his new lover. "I've been keeping Remy company."

"LeBeau?" Warren sounded surprised. "What do you want with him?"

"Drop the attitude, Warren. Remy and I are friends. If you can't deal with that, too bad, but I'm not giving up this relationship because you can't stand him."

"Hey, slow down, Drake! I didn't say a thing! You're making assumptions. I was just surprised." What the hell was going on? Why was Bobby this defensive? "How's LeBeau doing anyway? I thought he was staying at the boathouse."

At that moment Scott and the professor joined them. Charles addressed them, looking everyone in the eye for a few seconds. "Bobby, Warren, Jean, Betsy, Logan, we have a situation."

"What kinda situation?" Logan didn't like surprises.

"Sinister. I have reason to assume that he will try to get inside of the mansion and it is within his power to open a tesseract and enter the mansion," explained Charles.

"Why would he do that?" Warren had a certain suspicion. "Does this have anything to do with LeBeau?"

"Yes," said Scott. "Sinister's after him, has been harassing Remy telepathically since Antarctica. Remy's now staying at the mansion, in Bobby's room to be exact. We have to make sure Sinister can't get to him."

Logan cocked his head. "So Sinister's after the boy? Wonder why."

"Does he need a reason?" Scott met Logan's eyes. "He has been making my life miserable for years."

Betsy and Warren exchanged a look. "Is that why you called us here?" asked Warren. "To make sure we protect him?"

"Warren," said Charles, "I know there's some unfinished business between Remy and you, but you have to put that aside. I need you to be a team, as a family."

Warren thought it over. "I can't stand LeBeau, that's no secret, but I'm loyal to the team. I'll help." Betsy also nodded her head.

"Where's Rogue?" Scott suddenly realized she was missing.

"She said something about visiting her mother, Mystique," supplied Betsy.

Scott didn't like that one bit. She hadn't even informed him she was leaving, but at least he had the others support.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With trepidation, Remy entered the medlab. "Henri?" He just wanted this over with. He would never pass the tests and Hank would put him on the inactive list. Bobby was at his side, complaining about the tiring training session he had just gone through. It meant a lot to him that Bobby was at his side.

"Ah, Remy, please join me in my office." Hank signaled them to approach.

Remy shuffled in to the office, Bobby almost pulling him inside. "Hey, Hank! Here's one reluctant patient!" joked Bobby.

Hank smiled. "I can see that. Please sit down, Remy. Bobby, you can pick Remy up in two hours."

"Can't I stay?" Bobby threw his puppy dog's look at Hank. "Please?"

"It would make me feel more comfortable," said Remy in a soft tone.

"Robert, go the waiting area. I'll call you when I'm done."

Bobby sighed, but gave in. "Don't take too long, Hank."

After Bobby left, Hank signaled Remy to lay down on an exam bed. "I'm going to hook you up to a monitor, Remy. You know the procedure."

"Oui, I do." Remy wanted to close his eyes and block everything out, but any kind of lab always gave him the creeps. He watched every move Hank made and suddenly sensed something odd. Every team member's mind had a certain feel to it. Hank's seemed to have changed overnight. "What?" Alarmed he sat up and stared in to familiar eyes, but at the same time they were different. An evil expression appeared in Hank's eyes.

"You... You're..." Remy tried to jump off the table, realizing he was dealing with a Doppelganger. "You ain't Henri, you're..."

"Nice to meet you, LeBeau, Sinister promised me some of your DNA... Now shut up!"

Remy's eyes grew big, feeling the tip of a syringe dip beneath his skin. "Bobby!" Had Bobby heard his scream? He was feeling dizzy and the lab was spinning. Dark Beast was laughing at him, mimicking his unsteady movements. In front of him a tesseract formed and he realized he needed to make a run for it now, if he wanted to survive! He started for the doorway, but was moving in slow motion. "Bobby!"

The door slammed open and Bobby hurried inside. "Remy? What's..." Seeing the tesseract, he realized Remy was in danger. "Hank, get him away from there!"

Dark Beast laughed, grabbed Remy and slung him over his shoulder. One leap took him inside the tesseract.

Bobby stood there, stunned and staring at Hank in disbelief. Suddenly Remy looked at him from within the swirls of the tesseract.

"Not Henri... Dark Beast..." After that, he lost consciousness.

Bobby never thought about his actions and just jumped in to the tesseract. "Remy!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Intruder detected... Intruder detected."

The alarm startled the team. Scott directed them. "Warren, control room. Logan, Jean, you're with me. Betsy, stay with the professor."

A few seconds later, Warren's voice sounded over the computer system. "Scott, you want to head for the medlab. A tesseract formed there."

"We're on our way. Logan, Jean, follow me."

It took them a minute to reach the medlab and when they arrived they found it empty. An exam table had been knocked over, but that was it. Scott walked over to Hank's computer, which was hooked up to the mansion's main computer. "Warren, show me the security tapes."

A moment later the tape came online. Shocked, they watched Hank grab Remy, jump in to the tesseract and Bobby following them. "Dark Beast," Scott grumbled, angrily. "Why didn't we notice?" The others didn't answer him.

"That's not important, Scott," said Charles as he entered the medlab, followed by Betsy. "What is important is getting them back."

"And how do we do that, Charlie?" Logan growled softly. The fact that he hadn't sniffed out Dark Beast felt like a personal failure to him.

Charles didn't know the answer to Logan's question, but as he looked at each of them, in turn, he felt that they were determined to get their team-mates back, and that included Remy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

His head was reeling. A killer headache pounded away behind his temples and he didn't dare open his eyes. Suddenly, he remembered what had happened and his eyes flashed open involuntarily. Bobby blinked once. He was in some sort of cell, with bars instead of walls.

"Ro...bert?"

The voice startled him and he wanted to ice up to fight Dark Beast, but nothing happened. Shocked, he realized he was wearing a collar that neutralized his powers.

"Ro...bert? Please?"

Bobby looked down, finding Hank at the far right of the cell. He was lying on the cold, metallic floor, shivering. Heat radiated from the furry body and the eyes were unfocused. "Hank, is that you?" Or was Dark Beast playing him again?

"It's me... Robert... Dark Beast is with... Sinister..." Hank's breath rattled in his lungs. "I must have caught... some kind of infection. Sinister... ran an experiment on me..."

Bobby still didn't fully believe him. "What's your secret, Hank? Tell me, I need to know it's you. You told only me, remember? You made me swear to keep quiet."

"I'm... gay..." Hank wasn't up to playing games. "Robert... I need water... Dehydrated..."

Convinced, Bobby picked up the bottled water and helped Hank drink. "How did you get here?" He placed a hand on Hank's brow and flinched away. "That's one hell of a fever."

"Started a few days ago..."

"How long have you been here?" How long had Dark Beast been fooling them?

"Two months, I guess."

"Two months? Oh, shit, all the things I told Dark Beast... He fitted in perfectly, even gave me Twinkies for my birthday."

"Robert, don't know how much longer... I can stay awake. Be careful... Sinister's insane..."

"I'll be careful," promised Bobby. Worried, he watched Hank's eyes close and his friend slipped into unconsciousness. Feeling fiercely protective, he decided he had to locate Remy, and then he had to get them out of here. If only he could lose the collar!

A metallic sound caught his attention and his heart missed a beat, seeing Sinister push Remy inside. "Remy!" He jumped to his feet, ran over to the bars and tried to bend them, without success. He was a prisoner. Remy's eyes were bleak and the Cajun looked drained. Remy wasn't wearing a collar and he wondered why Remy wasn't fighting Sinister.

"Well, Mister Drake, how nice of you to join us," said Sinister amused. "Your arrival is unexpected, but I'm glad you jumped after Remy here. Now I have an even better way of controlling our Cajun friend. You see, he knows that I'll kill you and your friend, Doctor McCoy if he doesn't please me. Remy wants to keep you alive and will do whatever I ask of him."

"Remy, no..." Bobby's face contorted. He had a pretty good idea what Sinister wanted from Remy. "Don't do it."

Remy felt Bobby's concern. "I'm sorry, cher, but I can't risk you and Henri getting killed. I can deal with it." Sinister pressed against him, pulling him close to his chest and he felt the other man's erect cock against his ass. "He'll return you to Westchester, cher."

"What makes you think he will keep his word!" Bobby was growing furious. "This is emotional blackmail!" Remy wouldn't deny Sinister for fear that the scientist would kill him and Hank. "Please, Remy, don't do this."

"He'll torture you," explained Remy. "I can't let that happen. Hank's already ill; he wouldn't survive." He shuddered as Sinister's cold, metallic hand slipped beneath his shirt to rub his back. "Just forget I ever existed, cher..."

"No!" Bobby screamed, mad with rage, watching them disappear in to the next room. "No, Remy, don't do it! He'll hurt you!" But Remy no longer heard him and Hank's feverish mumbling demanded his attention. Biting back his tears, he returned to tend to Hank, but his thoughts remained with Remy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Remy, come here... It'll be like old times." Sinister reached for the naked young man, seeing Remy shiver at his touch. "Maybe this will help." Re-arranging his molecules, he shape shifted in to the young man Remy had fallen in love with years ago.

Remy shuddered, looking into brown, almost black, eyes. Long, dark hair reached Sinister's back. He had once loved the sparkle of the sun tanned body. Years ago he had fallen in love with the exotique look, but he now knew the illusion for what it was. Sinister was a meta morph and had played him all this time. No, seeing Sinister like this didn't help. Nathan was a lie, an illusion. It was Sinister who controlled everything, controlled him.

"Remy, I won't ask twice..." Sinister lay down on the bed, and signaled Remy to join him. "You know what I want and how I want it."

Oh yeah, he did. Gooseflesh formed on Remy's skin as he lay down beside Sinister. He closed his eyes when the other man's icy fingers touched his skin. The touch felt cold and metallic, reminding him it was Sinister in bed with him. He had better get this over with. He started to push himself up to his elbows and knees, presenting himself on all fours. Nathan, no Sinister, had always preferred doggie-style. "Just do it."

"Not so fast, Remy. I want to enjoy having you in my bed again. I want to last... Suck me." Sinister grinned, pulled Remy close to him and moved the Cajun down his body until that delicious mouth rested above his twitching cock. "You always gave good head, Remy. Don't disappoint me. Your friends' lives are hanging in the balance, always remember that." He leaned back, enjoying the lost expression in Remy's eyes. He raised one hand, rested it on Remy's head and pushed him down. "Open that mouth and make me come."

Disgust overwhelmed Remy, but he obeyed, closing his lips around the already leaking cock. Sinister tasted bitter and his stomach contracted, urging him to stop, but that was not an option. Bobby and Hank depended on him. He knew Sinister would kill them slowly, give them a painful death if he didn't perform satisfactory.

It's only sex, LeBeau, get over it. Remy bit back tears when he licked the length of Sinister's cock. The hand on his head didn't give him much space and now pushed him down again, forcing him to deep throat the bastard. Remy almost gagged, but then relaxed his throat. He had done this before, he could do it again. But back then he had done it out of love and affection. Back then he had wanted to get his lover off. Now Sinister was forcing him to do it.

"You can do better, Remy." Sinister threw back his head, relaxed and thrust abruptly, taking Remy completely by surprise.

Remy released a choked yelp, but couldn't pull back. Sinister was keeping him in place. Realizing that he didn't have a way out, he relaxed his throat, surrendered to the other man's power. Sinister fucked his mouth and he hoped it would be over quickly. Salty cream shot down his throat and he almost choked. Suddenly one of Sinister's hands massaged his throat, forcing him to swallow. Tears flowed from his eyes, tears of pain and humiliation.

"Well done, Remy. I might be inclined to release your friends tonight." Sinister grabbed Remy's head and pulled the Cajun close. He wanted to taste himself on those bruised lips. "Part your teeth..."

Remy hated himself for obeying, but he parted his teeth and flinched when Sinister's tongue explored his mouth. Hating himself for being this weak, he offered no resistance, knowing Sinister would only hurt him and his friends worse if he put up any form of resistance.

"You still taste good, Remy. Why did you ever leave me?" Sinister brought his arms up behind Remy's back and rolled the Cajun on to his back. He parted Remy's legs and settled between them, growing hard again at the sight of the helpless man beneath him. "You're beautiful, you always were. A unique beauty, Remy..." Disappointed, he noticed that Remy wasn't aroused yet. "I want you to come when I'm inside you. You feel so exquisite... "

Non, please don't... But Sinister did as he pleased, stroking him firmly. His self hate built, finding he was growing hard under the bastard's ministrations.

"It looks you still care about me, Remy..." Sinister grinned wickedly. "I missed you, missed being inside you. Making love feels amazing when I'm inside you..."

I hate you! I fucking hate you! Ashamed that a tear managed to escape his eyes, he tried to turn away his head, but Sinister didn't let him.

"I want to see your face when I enter you, Remy." Sinister spit into his hand, stroked himself once and then positioned himself at the tight hole.

Remy's body tensed, feeling the head of Sinister's cock at his entrance. Nathan had always carefully prepared him, but Sinister had other plans. This was going to hurt.

"Pull your legs toward your chest, do it, Remy." His cock eagerly rubbed against Remy's entrance.

Remy did as he was told, realizing he was opening himself up to Sinister. But what could he do stop this? Nothing. Sinister had made it very clear that if he tried something Hank and Bobby would die a slow death. He closed his eyes, trying to shut out Sinister.

"Open those gorgeous eyes, Remy. I want to see the expression in them when I bury myself inside your body." Sinister started to push inside, irritated that Remy wasn't co-operating. The red on black eyes opened, revealing all the hurt in the world. Sinister laughed and then forced himself a way inside.

Remy's eyes widened and he released a startled scream filled with pain and humiliation. The ring of muscle fought Sinister, trying to keep him out, but Sinister was relentless and buried himself to the hilt. Sobbing softly from pain, Remy's tense body hummed with pain.

Sinister grunted. "Yes, that's it... I'm inside... Inside." He tugged at Remy's lax cock, hoping the Cajun would grow hard again. He started to thrust, relishing the tightness around him. The velvet glove contracted around him, and as he stared into Remy's eyes, he felt some of the Cajun's pain. "Relax, it doesn't have to be this way. You're doing this to yourself. If I hurt you, it's your fault, not mine!"

Remy's fingernails dug a hole in to the sheet as Sinister's thrusts pushed him across the bed. The bastard wasn't holding back, battering against his prostate until the usually pleasant sensation turned in to agony. Remy failed to hold back another tear, not caring if Sinister got off on it. The pain crushed him! He hoped that Sinister would come quickly, but the blowjob had taken the edge off for the scientist and the thrusts continued, growing harder, faster and more brutal. Suddenly Sinister pulled out and Remy half hoped that it was over, but then he was rolled on to his stomach and he realized the nightmare wasn't over yet.

Sinister grabbed his hips, pulled him close to his groin and pushed back inside. He lay there like a rag doll, unable to stop Sinister, or to move at all. He buried his head in the sheets, holding on for dear life. He lost all sense of time as the pounding continued. His insides hurt, his back cried out with pain and he felt nauseous.

"Yes, yes... Oh, Remy, you're so tight, you feel so good!" Sinister was babbling, pistoning in and out. He stared at the small, compact ass in his hands and he growled, seeing his cock disappear in to the tight hole. Blood clung to his cock, LeBeau's blood, but he didn't care. He was too close to orgasm.

Remy bordered on unconsciousness, but he still registered the pain. Sinister used his power to move him on his cock and he rode the pain, trying to detach himself from what Sinister was doing to him. Suddenly Sinister shivered, thrust deeply and a warm sensation filled his ass. It was over, over! The bastard had come!

Sinister released a shuddering breath and rubbed the mounds of flesh in front of him. He allowed himself the luxury of staying inside the trembling body a little longer, massaging Remy's back.

Remy shuddered at the gentle touch. His eyes closed and he yelled in pain as Sinister pulled out. Now that Sinister was no longer holding him in place, he collapsed, sunk down on the mattress. He curled up in a fetal position, ignoring the pain the movement caused and tightly shut his eyes. The pain became unbearable and he surrendered to oblivion.

"Remy? LeBeau!" Sinister, irritated that Remy was shutting down, rolled the Cajun onto his back, finding that Remy was unconscious. Quickly, he checked Remy over. "Damn, I made him bleed." He had torn the Cajun, causing the bleeding. That hadn't been part of his plan, but Remy had caused the discomfort himself by not relaxing.

He left the bed, disappeared in to the bathroom and cleaned himself up. Thoughtfully, he returned to the bed, watching Remy sleep. He would repair the damage he had done, not because he felt sorry for LeBeau, but because he wanted to take the Cajun again shortly. He could only do that if LeBeau had healed sufficiently. After covering the naked man with a blanket, he headed back to his lab to gloat over his newest victory. Drake wouldn't want LeBeau after finding out what had just happened in his bedroom! Isolated and shunned by his fellow X-Men, Remy would have no one to turn to expect him. Remy LeBeau was his forever!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bobby's face was stained with tears. Remy's screams had cut through his soul, leaving scars. Hank's head rested in his lap. Fortunately, Hank had turned unconscious before the screams had started and McCoy had no idea what had happened.

Seeing Sinister stalk toward him, he quickly wiped away his tears. He refused to give Sinister the satisfaction of seeing him cry. Defiantly he locked eyes with the mad scientist. "You bastard!"

Sinister laughed loudly. "Jealous, Drake? Did you hear him scream? I did that to him."

A dark anger built in the pit of Bobby's stomach. "You hurt him. You're gonna die."

Sinister laughed amused. "You? You think you can kill me? Stronger mutants tried and failed. No, you'll return to Westchester once I finished my experiments and you'll leave LeBeau here with me. You can't possibly still want him after I fucked him." Sinister used his trump. "He's been my whore for years. I bet you didn't know that."

Bobby bared his teeth, wondering if Logan felt like this when going feral. He just wanted to kill Sinister. Kill him with his bare hands for making Remy scream with pain. "You left out something, Sinister. You played him for years! Giving him an illusion to love. Remy didn't know it was you!"

Sinister's eyes narrowed. "I might have underestimated you. I never thought LeBeau would tell you, but it doesn't change a thing. He's staying here with me. I'll keep my word and let you go."

"Why? You're a lying bastard."

"Because LeBeau will feel honor bound to keep up his part of the bargain. As long as he comes to me willingly I won't kill you, Drake."

Bobby couldn't hold back any longer. He slipped away from underneath Hank, jumped up and pulled at the bars, which didn't nudge. "You're gonna pay for this! Once I get this collar off I'm gonna kill you!"

Sinister laughed again. "I must say I'm surprised that you're still attached to LeBeau. Well, it's over now. You'll never see him again." With those words, he turned around and left.

Seething with anger, Bobby stared at Sinister's back, vowing he would make Sinister pay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy uncurled slowly, biting his bottom lip when a sharp pain swept through his lower body. Suddenly all memories returned, making him yelp softly. He had never been taken this brutally, without proper preparation, and it had shaken him badly. Mon Dieu, it hurt. He pushed himself into a sitting position and hissed sharply when the pain increased.

"It was just sex, nothing more." He refused to admit he had been forced. With slow movements, he managed to grab his clothes. He slipped in to his shirt, but had to give up on putting on his jeans. Moving just hurt too much. At least he was now partially dressed.

Swinging his feet on to the floor, he hesitantly tried to stand. The pain was still there, but was bearable now. But he got his biggest shock looking at the bed. A red stain had formed on the sheet. He gritted his teeth, realizing it was his blood. The bastard had made him bleed! Humiliated, he leaned against the wall. He didn't feel like the man he used to be, didn't feel like a man at all. The sex didn't bother him, he liked being on the bottom, but being taken like that made him feel ashamed and worthless.

"Get your act together, LeBeau. You need to find Hank and Bobby and send them home." He didn't care what Sinister did to him, but he wanted Hank and Bobby in safety. Especially Bobby. Right now Sinister was content fucking him, but what if the scientist turned his attention to Bobby? He shivered and headed for the door, but it was locked. Disappointed, he banged his fist in to the door. "Non, just give me a chance to get them out!" If he'd had the right equipment he could have picked the lock, but he had nothing on him.

"You're not going anywhere."

Remy spun around, nearly lost his balance and leaned heavily against the door. His skin turned to gooseflesh seeing Sinister walk toward him. "What do you want?" His bravado was just an act. He was cringing with pain and fear.

Sinister didn't answer him. He grabbed Remy by an arm, pulled him close and inserted the tip of a syringe with he had hidden behind his back.

"Non!" Remy stared at the syringe dazedly. "What did you do?" He started kicking, but the drug quickly made its way through his system and he collapsed on to the floor.

Sinister picked him up and swung him over his shoulder. After unlocking the door, he carried Remy in to the lab. He was doing this on purpose, sending Drake a clear message. He heard Drake hiss when the X-Man saw him place Remy on the exam table.

"Get your dirty hands off him!" Bobby pulled at the bars again.

"Robert... Don't. Preserve your strength." Hank, who had regained consciousness a few minutes ago tried to call Bobby back, but he was too weak. The fever was wrecking havoc on his system. He felt sympathetic, seeing Remy in this state, but knew they couldn't help.

"Shut up, Hank!" Bobby stared at Remy and seethed with anger when Sinister removed Remy's shirt, revealing bruises and blood that clung to his thighs. "You're so dead, Sinister."

Sinister caressed Remy's chest, and grinned at Drake. "Remy LeBeau's mine now. Come for him and I'll kill him. Do you understand? Forget he ever existed."

Bobby wished he could ice up the bars, but that damn collar was keeping him back. "I'll never forget Remy!"

"But you will," said Sinister menacingly. He rolled a nipple between his fingers and grinned satisfactory. "You're getting boring, Drake. It's time for you to leave. I've got what I wanted."

Bobby screamed in anger when the bars began to fade. Suddenly he felt Hank's arm around his waist and his world turned black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Scott was knocked off his feet when a tesseract formed in front of him. "Sinister!"

Jean, Warren and the professor prepared themselves for a possible attack.

"I can't believe Sinister can open a tesseract in here!" Warren refrained from spreading his wings. He was at a distinct disadvantage when fighting in confined quarters like the kitchen. They had been drinking coffee, trying to come up with plans to spring Remy, Bobby and Hank when the tesseract had formed.

"This might be our one chance," whispered Charles. "Wait for Sinister to materialize."

Warren nodded his head. He wanted a piece of Sinister for abducting Bobby and Hank... and maybe even for kidnapping LeBeau. He still didn't like the Cajun, but Remy was part of the team and Sinister had crossed a line by kidnapping LeBeau. He was ready to strike when something slammed into him, knocking him off his feet. He blinked once and looked in to Bobby's face. His friend was unconscious, but an angry expression had remained on his face.

Another body materialized and Scott charged forward, immediately recognizing Hank. "I've got him." Hank was too heavy to carry so he gently placed him on the floor. "Let's hope it's Hank and not Dark Beast. Jean?"

Jean quickly performed a scan. "It's Hank."

"They need to be in the medlab." Jean, can you..." Scott hadn't finished his question when Hank's body already started to float in the room. Jean was using her telekinetic powers to transport him to the medlab.

"Warren, listen to me," instructed the professor as Warren placed Bobby's unconscious form across his lap. "I doubt another tesseract will form, but I need someone standing guard. Go to the control room and check the mansion and its premises."

Warren reluctantly complied. If it was up to him he would have preferred to stay with Bobby. "Yes, sir." He quickly left for the control room.

Jean, Scott, and the professor took their patients to the medlab. Jean placed Hank's body on an exam table and Scott lifted Bobby gently, placing him on another exam table. Then he stood back, letting Jean and Charles check on their friends. "Where's Remy?" Why had Bobby and Hank been returned, but not the Cajun?

"Hank's running a fever," announced Jean.

"Bobby seems to be all right." Charles covered Bobby with a blanket and then joined Jean to help her interpret Hank's readings. "It might be an infection. Start him on antibiotics." Concentrating, he contacted Warren. Anything unusual?

No, everything seems fine. How are they doing, sir?

Bobby's fine, Hank has a fever, but I'm fairly certain he will recover. Continue to watch for tesseracts.

Yes, sir.

Charles locked eyes with Scott. "We need to talk." Jean was tending to Hank and the two men left the med lab. They headed for Charles's study.

Scott sat down and studied Charles. "What do you think happened? Why would Sinister send them back in one piece?"

"I don't know, Scott. We'll have to wait until they wake up. I want you to join Warren and check our security system. We have to find a way to stop the tesseracts from forming inside the house."

Scott agreed. "I'm on it, sir." He quickly left the study and headed for the control room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jean startled as Bobby released a choked scream. She quickly hurried over to his side. "Bobby, everything's all right. You're back at the mansion." Bobby sat upright and stared blindly at her. Worried, Jean frowned. "Bobby? Bobby?" Suddenly Bobby's eyes cracked and he noticed her. His hands grabbed hers and held her close.

"Jean, Sinister's got Remy. He hurt him... I need to go back! What am I doing here? I have to go back and help Remy!"

Jean forced herself to remain calm. Bobby was raving and his expression was wild. "Bobby, calm down or I have to administer a sedative."

Bobby glared at her, then swung his feet on to the floor. He released her hands and got to his feet. "I have to go back!"

Jean followed him, while mentally updating the professor. Charles reacted at once, promising her that he was already on his way to the medlab. "Bobby, please stay and calm down."

"You don't understand! He was hurt, bleeding! Sinister's gonna break and eventually kill him!" Bobby had reached the doorway and wanted to step into the corridor when the professor appeared.

"Bobby, come with me and we'll talk. We'll find a way to help Remy." Charles extended his head. "Robert, trust me. We'll do this together."

Bobby stared at the extended hand. "We don't have time to talk, sir."

"First we need a plan and you help us form one. Come with me, Bobby, talk to me and we'll find a way to help Remy." Charles nodded encouragingly.

Bobby sighed. The professor was right. He didn't even know how to get to Sinister. "Fine, we'll talk, but then we're going in and we'll get Remy out."

"I promise," said Charles sincerely.

Bobby nodded his head and followed Charles to his study. Sinister, I'm gonna ice you up and shatter your form in to a million pieces.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Bobby?" Charles signaled Bobby to sit down. "Tell me what happened." He pressed a shot of bourbon in the younger man's hand, and Bobby quickly drowned it.

"It was horrible," whispered Bobby upset. He was staring at the wall and his hands shook. Charles quickly grabbed the glass before it could drop on the floor. Bobby finally made eye contact. "I heard him scream."

"Scream?" Charles carefully scanned Bobby's mind, making sure his student didn't notice it. He knew what had happened in Sinister's lab before Bobby told him and he felt shocked.

"Sinister threatened he would hurt Hank and me if Remy didn't comply. He wanted Remy to come to him willingly, but... Remy only did it to save our lives. I can't believe Remy did that!" Tears slowly rolled down his face. "I mean, I don't know what I would have done if our situations had been reversed. I don't know if I could have done that to buy my team mates' freedom."

Charles nodded and rested a hand on Bobby's shoulder, reassuringly rubbing it. "Remy was in a vulnerable state and Sinister used that to his advantage. We can't change what happened, no matter how much we want to, but we can concentrate on locating him and getting him out. When we get him back, he's going to need your support."

"And the team's." Bobby looked questioningly at the professor. "Hank doesn't know what happened to Remy, and none of the others do. I wanna keep it that way."

Charles agreed. "We'll tell them Remy got hurt, no more."

Bobby sighed relieved. "And now what?"

"Now I'm going to use Cerebro to locate Sinister and then we're getting Remy back."

Bobby abruptly rose to his feet. "No offense, sir, but I need some fresh air. I feel... trapped."

"That's understandable. Go for a walk, but don't stray too far."

Bobby nodded. "Thanks, sir." He quickly fled the study. He needed to be alone with his thoughts right now. Not bothering with putting on a coat, he ran in to the dark night. It happened involuntarily, changing to ice. Using an ice slide, he headed for the lake, hoping no one was out there.

Once he arrived at the lake he shifted back, sat down and stared at the dark sky and crescent moon. He was going up against Sinister, one of their most powerful enemies and he had vowed to take down the monster. As long as Sinister lived, Remy was in danger. But how was he going to eliminate Sinister? The man was a powerful mutant and no one had ever succeeded in killing him. Scott's optic blast hurt Sinister, but couldn't kill him, so how was he going to pull off the impossible?

When Emma Frost had taken over she had taken his power to a whole new level. She had done things he had never believed possible. He had truly been a force of nature, but could he ever push himself like that? When it came down to trying new things, he was a coward, but now Remy's life was at stake and maybe he didn't have a choice.

"Hey, Drake, what are ya doin' out here?"

Bobby spun around, almost expecting Sinister to step out of a tesseract, but it was only Logan. "Just leave me alone. I'm not in the mood for company." He sat back down again, glaring at the lake.

Logan recognized Bobby's mood, having suffered it frequently as well. "Ya wanna kill the bastard."

"Oh yeah, you have no idea." Bobby's eyes fastened on Logan. "I think I finally understand what going feral is all about. I want to kill him with my bare hands for hurting Remy."

Logan listened up. He didn't know what had happened and Charles had refused to tell him. "What did Sinister do?"

But Bobby shook his head. "Hurt Remy, hurt him bad." Remy wouldn't appreciate it if everyone knew what had happened in the lab.

"So what are ya gonna do now, bub?" Logan sat on his heels beside Bobby. "Ya can count on me. I wanted some piece of the bastard for some time now. Wanna find out if his armor can deal with my claws." He laughed menacingly.

"Sinister's mine, Logan. Don't get in the way."

Bobby's determination impressed Logan, but he seriously doubted Drake could it pull it off. Bobby wasn't a killer and he certainly wasn't strong enough to take on someone of Sinister's caliber. "I ain't stoppin' ya, Drake, but think a moment about what yer gonna do. Yer gonna take a life, no matter how evil Sinister is, it'll be murder."

"I don't fucking care!" His anger had a tight hold on him. "I just gotta stop him from hurting Remy ever again!"

Logan realized that he wouldn't get through to Bobby until the younger man had settled down. Instead of talking, he offered Drake his silent company. For the next hour, they stared at the lake, both men sorting out their thoughts and emotions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy angrily paced his room. He had woken up here a few minutes ago, finding that the pain which tormented his lower body was gone completely. Sinister had probably taken care of the damage he had done. That gave him an edge. He was mobile again, alert and ready to find a way out. Sinister had made one other mistake; Sinister hadn't collared him. He could blast the door and fight himself a way out, but... Were Bobby and Hank still at the base? If they were he had to lay low for a while and appease Sinister. First he had to know if Sinister had send them back, only then could he take action.

Pacing fast, he tried hard to forget what Sinister had done to him. Taking on Nathan's appearance had confronted him with the fact that Sinister had fooled him for years. He had really loved Nathan and had thought that it was mutual. What a fool he had been! Sinister had played him back then and now once again. He hadn't even put up a fight!

Self hate crept up on him and he stared at his arm. Apparently Sinister had also take care of the burn on his arm. Angrily, his kinetic energy began to burn in his fingertips and he placed them against his thigh, hoping finding the burns there would put Sinister off. Damn it, the bastard hadn't given him any clothes either, making him feel even more vulnerable.

He hissed as the stench of burned flesh flowed in to the air. He pulled back his hand, staring at the five burns left behind on his thigh. The pain was a welcome distraction, taking his mind off Sinister, Bobby and Hank. There was too much pain to worry about his enemy and his friends.

The burns looked ugly and would grow infected without the proper care, but Remy didn't care right now. He just wanted to forget. Laying down on the cold floor, he curled up, letting oblivion flow over him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"LeBeau! What did you do now?" Worried, Sinister knelt next to Remy's sleeping form. This wasn't going according to plan. He had hoped to seduce LeBeau, to win his affection and dedication, to re-erect the love they had shared years ago. The burns still felt warm to his touch and he stood back, watching Remy.

The love they had shared had been special to him. Time and time again he had tried to win Remy over, but the Cajun had spoken of betrayal and dismissed him. Remy's rejection had driven him to make insane plans. The Massacre had been one of them. Why had the police found Remy first? He had wanted to nurse the Cajun back to health, to earn his eternal gratitude, but it had never happened.

Then he had found Remy at Antarctica, deserted, starving, dying and he had taken Remy with him. He had nursed him back to health, had enjoyed Remy's presence for two months. Then Remy had managed to flee. That had made him mad as hell. The Cajun was as elusive as quicksand!

"What do I have to do to win your love?" He regretted going so fast when they had made love, but an animalistic urge had taken over. He had needed to claim Remy, to prove his dominance, but in the process he had only hurt the Cajun. Looking at it in retrospect, he realized that Remy's pain and fear had slipped into his mind, but he had been too eager to make love to allow those feelings to register.

"I didn't want it to be like this." Remy LeBeau... The empath had stolen his heart years ago. Through the empathy his feelings had awakened again and he had fallen madly in love with the Cajun. He had realized that Remy would never accept someone like Sinister and he had created Nathan. For a short time he had been happy. He had created an illusion, had started to live the life of a mortal human, just to please Remy.

But in the end everything had fallen apart. Remy had found out that he had been lying and the Cajun, deeply hurt, had left. Then he had made it worse by staging the Massacre. Oh, he had made plenty of mistakes, but always had love for Remy guided his actions. Now he had even taken his refuge to threatening Remy's friends and new lover.

He frowned, feeling the rage return. Finding out that Remy and Drake were a couple now had started the rage, had made him scheme again. That Dark Beast had already infiltrated the mansion had served him well. He had given Dark Beast false DNA samples, telling him they belonged to Remy LeBeau. A smile stole on to his face. Did Dark Beast really think he would hand over LeBeau's DNA? Never. He wouldn't let Dark Beast pollute the gene poll with his petty experiments!

Remy stirred and Sinister was jolted in to action. "Why the floor, Remy? There's a perfectly good bed in the corner." He picked up Remy, who continued to sleep, and deposited the Cajun on the bed, covering him with warm blankets. Thoughtfully he remained standing at the bed, studying Remy further.

Remy was pale and knowing the Cajun had resorted to self mutilation to deal with his problems worried him. Had his actions driven the Cajun over the edge? He sighed. Why was everything this complicated? Because his emotions were back. Numb and without feelings life had been a lot easier on him.

Suddenly Remy's eyes opened and they fastened on him. The empath's feelings were too strong to contain and Remy let some of them slip. Sinister flinched, feeling the depth of Remy's loneliness.

"Did you keep your word? Did you send them back?" Remy moistened his chapped lips. How had he gotten in to this accursed bed? He didn't want to be in it! This was where Sinister had taken him.

"They're back at the mansion. You know I always keep my word." Sinister wanted to push back a stray lock, but saw Remy flinch away from his touch and pulled back.

"And I'll keep mine," whispered Remy. He felt broken, but wasn't ready yet to give up. As long as he was strong enough to move about he would search for a way out, but he wasn't going back to Westchester. He couldn't show his face there ever again now that Bobby and Hank knew. He would find a nice little place where he could settle down, maybe start a new life. But he would miss Bobby greatly.

"Remy..." Sinister sat down on the side of the bed and Remy immediately moved away from him, moving as close to the edge of the bed as possible. "I still love you. I still want you."

"I don't love you... You only used me. That's all you do." Remy bit his bottom lip, uncertain how Sinister would react.

"You love Drake now?" Sinister's red eyes glowed.

Remy swallowed hard. "Oui, and he loves me back. He doesn't play games like you do. You never were honest with me. You let me believe Nathan was real."

"Would you have accepted me as your lover like this?" He pointed at himself.

"I don't know," whispered Remy. "Nathan was handsome, but I didn't love him for his good looks. He was really supportive, gave me all the attention and love I needed. I don't know what would have happened had you shown your real colors."

Remy's emotions started to affect him and Sinister began to feel sorry for the way he had treated the Cajun. "I should apologize for..."

Remy's head jerked back. Sinister wanted to apologize? What the hell?

"I shouldn't have taken you so roughly, but all I could think about was that you were in my bed again. I missed you."

Remy thought he had finally gone insane. "What are you doing?"

Sinister fingered a lock of Remy's hair, finding that the Cajun was trying to get away from his touch... again. "Whenever you're close you confuse me."

Remy arched an eyebrow. Where was this going? He had never seen Sinister this... calm, gentle. Nathan had been like this, but never Sinister! Merde, his head started to spin.

"You're tired. I regret sedating you, but I doubt you would have wanted to go through surgery while awake. I had to put in some stitches, but I'm sure you'll make a full recovery." Remy's confusion washed over him, became his. In the end, he rose abruptly and left the room.

Remy, dazed, stared at the closing door. He didn't know what was going on with the scientist, but it had bought him some time. He pushed himself to his feet, and took the blanket with him. He wasn't comfortable with being naked right now. He doubted Sinister would be back shortly and studied the lock. A small, kinetic charge should do the trick. He placed one finger against the lock and a small explosion rocked the lock, snapping it open. "Bingo..." Remy got to his feet again, pushed the door ajar and stepped in to the corridor. Which way to go? He shrugged, chose the corridor to his right and started walking.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sinister watched Remy on the monitors. The Cajun was heading toward the lab where Dark Beast was working and that urged him in to action. Dark Beast was unpredictable and he didn't want to risk a confrontation. Within a few seconds, he accessed the right corridor. "Remy? Come back here. Don't go there."

Remy spun around, wishing he had something to charge. He looked about, but didn't find anything. Still, his fingers began to glow. "Let me be, Sinister."

"Stop it, Remy. You can't charge anything and you'll end up blowing up yourself. Pull it back." Sinister frowned. Remy's hand continued to glow harder.

"I'd rather blow myself up than be with you!" Sorry, Bobby. Cher, didn't want it to end like this, but I can't stand his touch. If I thought there was still a chance to get back to you, I wouldn't be doing this, but Sinister won't ever let me leave. I'd better end it here, now.

Sinister shuddered. "You'd rather blow yourself up than be with me?"

"Oui! Don't you get it? I hate you! You hurt me and I hate you! All I can think off is getting away from you!"

Sinister swayed on his feet as Remy's hate hit him. The intensity of the emotion baffled him. "You hate me? You loved me once!"

"I didn't love you! I loved an illusion you created!" His hands were starting to hurt. Any moment now his kinetic power would turn on himself, blow him in to a hundred pieces.

Sinister strengthened his shields and managed to push Remy's emotions behind his barriers. Able to think clearly again, he recognized the danger Remy was in. "Pull it back and I'll let you go." He had always thought that if he couldn't have LeBeau, no one should, but... He didn't want Remy dead. Some part of Sinister actually cared.

"You won't. You told me again and again that you wouldn't let me go. Why would I believe you now? Never again, Sinister. You won't use me ever again!" His hands were numb at this point. Pain was traveling up his arms, into his chest and his heartbeat became irregular. This was it. His body was only seconds away from giving in to the kinetic charge. I'm so sorry, cher, but Bobby, I can't keep doing this. Sinister will never let go. This is my only way out.

"I can't let you do this." Sinister used his telepathic powers to knock Remy out. It worked. The Cajun dropped to the floor with a soft yelp, but to Sinister's horror, the charge continued to build. "What did you do?"

He had learned a lot about Remy and his powers when they had been lovers and there was only one way to save Remy from the pressure building inside him. Sinister quickly knelt beside Remy, grabbed his hands and the charge traveled in to his body, shaking him, nearly knocking him out as well.

The glow died and Remy's skin returned to normal. Sinister swayed on his knees, but held on to consciousness. "Too close, much too close."

He rested for one moment, then picked up Remy and carried him to his room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Professor? Anything?" Jean looked at him expectedly. She had briefly left the med lab, leaving Warren in charge of Hank's care.

"Nothing." Charles sighed. Even Cerebro hadn't been able to locate Sinister.

Jean felt nervous. "What do we do now? Bobby's very volatile right now and everyone is edgy. The tension in the mansion is oppressive."

Charles nodded. "We can't do anything until we have Sinister's location. Where's Bobby right now?"

"Visiting Hank."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Robert..." Hank tried to smile at his friend. "What happened?" He was feeling better now that Jean had put him on antibiotics. Once he was back on his feet he had to run some tests on himself to find out what Sinister had done to him. But right now he focused on Bobby who looked worried and upset. "Did I really see Remy on Sinister's exam table?"

Bobby nodded once. Pain and anger were battling inside of him. "Yeah, Dark Beast got to Remy and I jumped after him. When I woke up I was in that cell with you and Remy... Remy made a deal with Sinister so the bastard would send us home."

"What kind of deal, Robert?" Hank didn't like the sound of this.

Bobby shrugged, unwilling to answer. "I don't know the details." He quickly changed their topic. "So what happened to you? I had no idea Dark Beast had taken your place. He acted like you. I never suspected a thing!"

"It happened about two months ago. I was working on my research when I was attacked from behind. A tesseract had opened and Dark Beast was all over me. A needle slipped beneath my skin and I became unconscious. I woke up on Sinister's exam table. He said that he didn't really need me as a lab rat, but now that I was here, he would run a test on me. He injected something, I don't know what it was, but I began to feel nauseous and I have been feverish ever since. Seeing you all of sudden shocked me."

"It was a trap, Hank. Sinister wanted Remy all along. That's probably why he had Dark Beast infiltrate the place." Bobby listlessly stared at his hands. "He's still at Sinister's lab, Hank. Remy's still there. I need to find him and bring him back."

Hank saw the pain in Bobby's eyes. "I take it something happened during my absence?"

"Turned out I also like men. I don't think I'm gay, Hank... Bi is more like it. Liking Remy in that way took me by surprise, but... the feelings are mutual." Bobby managed a weak smile.

Hank returned the smile. His big furry hand was a bit unsteady when he rested it on Bobby's shoulder. He squeezed gently. "I'm happy to hear that, Robert. Your happiness is very important to me."

Bobby actually blushed. "Hank, thanks..."

"So what's the plan?" Hank doubted he would be able to participate in the attack, but maybe he could help in other ways.

"So far the professor hasn't had any luck in locating Sinister..." Bobby's eyes grew dull. "And we can't do a thing until we find out his location. I hate waiting like this. Who knows what that bastard is doing to Remy." Suddenly he jumped to his feet and took up pacing. "Hank, I can't sit here like this! Remy doesn't stand a chance against Sinister!"

"The Cajun is stronger and smarter than we give him credit for." Logan unexpectedly entered the medlab. He had overheard part of their conversation. "Don't give up on LeBeau yet, Drake. The kid's tough." He also wanted some action, to get moving and get LeBeau back, but knew their hands were tied. "Hank, ain't there anything ya remember that can help?"

Hank shook his head. "No, I never left his laboratory. I was feverish most of the time. I'm sorry, Robert."

Bobby's shoulders slumped forward. "I can't lose him, not now when I just realized I love him."

Logan growled softly. "Don't give up yet, Drake." But except for providing moral support, there was little he could do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Remy came to, he was back in the bed, wrapped up tightly in warm blankets. "Huh?" Feeling groggy, he tried to take in his surroundings. The last thing he remembered was using his charging power to blow himself. "Merde, why didn't it work?" His vision was a bit blurry, his hands and arms hurt and his heart sometimes missed a beat. He had certainly managed to hurt himself, but had failed to end his life.

"You need to stop doing this to yourself, Remy."

He sucked in his breath, hearing Sinister's voice. The scientist stood at the foot end, watching him.

"You would have died, had I not absorbed your energy." He didn't want Remy to know that he was still reeling from absorbing the charge.

Remy closed his eyes and turned his head away from Sinister. "Why didn't you just let me die?" He felt cheated, betrayed.

"I don't want you dead, LeBeau." Sinister forced himself to remain calm and to carry out his earlier decision. "I take it you really hate me?"

Remy's eyes locked with his and Sinister saw something else besides hate in them.

"I also pity you."

Remy's words made Sinister's head spin. "You pity me?"

But Remy remained quiet after that. He just wanted to close his eyes and forget about Sinister, about being his prisoner. He could only hope that Sinister kept his word and let Bobby live now that he had broken their deal by trying to kill himself.

Sinister considered everything he had heard. "You leave me no choice."

Remy shivered at hearing those words. What was Sinister going to do now? He kept his eyes tightly shut and tried to ignore the cold hands, pushing beneath his back and legs. Suddenly he was lifted. Sinister was carrying him, but where were they headed?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy had a hard time keeping his eyes open when Sinister carried him in to his lab. He cringed, feeling the cold exam table beneath his back. Staring blankly, he realized how futile resistance was. Trying to blow himself up had exhausted him and now Sinister reached for another syringe, doubtlessly filled with a strong sedative. He managed to keep his eyes open, dismissing the urge to close his eyes to banish out Sinister's image. He had to know what Sinister was up to.

"Please, don't..." Remy whispered the plea softly. "I won't run..." Like he could run in his current state! His body felt heavy and sluggish; his vision was blurry and his head hurt. "You don't have to do this..." He would behave, for now.

Sinister laughed softly. "I know you better than that, Remy." Melancholy stole in to his red eyes as he studied Remy LeBeau. He didn't like seeing the cold sweat, the shivers and unfocused expression in the alien orbs that equaled his. He laughed privately. The first thing he had done when he had met Remy was run a DNA test. The red on black eyes had resembled his own too much, but the DNA test had come back negative. Remy's DNA was completely different from his.

Remy released a soft yelp as the tip of the syringe slipped beneath his skin. Finally he closed his eyes, unable to look at Sinister any longer. Who knew what the scientist was up to this time?

A soft sigh echoed through the lab and Remy suddenly realized it was Sinister sighing, and not him. That sparkled his curiosity. Sinister had been acting odd since he had tried to blow himself up. Opening one eye took him several seconds, as the sedative was enfolding its effect. He felt warm and pleasantly tired, but he knew better than to relax.

Sinister monitored Remy closely, hoping the Cajun would finally let himself fall into relaxation, but no, Remy's body remained tense. The Cajun was even keeping an eye on him. Maybe he should double the dose and inject more of the sedative, but Remy's reaction to med and drugs was often unpredictable. "Sleep."

"Non, never... Don't... trust... you." It was getting harder to talk and something tugged at his consciousness, trying to cloak him in darkness, but he didn't give in. He had to remain awake! He couldn't fall asleep!

Sinister sighed again, finally admitting to himself that Remy would never trust him again. He'd had his chance in the past and had screwed up.

Remy's eyes widened, feeling Sinister lift him again. "Where...?" Where were they headed? Why sedate him first? Remy shivered as a tesseract formed in front of them. Was Sinister scared that the X-Men would come for him here? Mon Dieu, the X-Men didn't care! Not even Bobby cared about him now! Not after what he had let Sinister do to him! No one would come for him!

The lights darkened and swirls appeared around them, making his head spin. Remy yelped softly, instinctively holding on to Sinister. He didn't want to get lost between tesseracts. Surprised, he felt Sinister return the gently squeeze, holding on to him tighter. Remy hated himself for being this weak, this needy. If only Sinister hadn't given him that sedative!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Cyke, intruder alert!"

Scott immediately jumped to his feet, signaling Bobby and Warren to follow him. "Logan, where did the tesseract form this time?" Logan was on monitor duty and it had paid off already to keep scanning for tesseracts.

"Drake's room," came Logan's answer. "I'll join ya there."

"No, stay were you are. This might be a trap. Keep monitoring!" Scott didn't trust Sinister. He had learned the hard way that the scientist was always scheming. "Bobby, stay close, Warren, take to the air and distract Sinister."

"Great," muttered Warren, unfolding his wings. He didn't like flying inside the mansion, hating the small spaces that limited his movement.

"What is he doing here?" Bobby iced up, ready to take out Sinister for once and for all. "And damn it, I can't kill him before I have Remy back."

Scott shot Bobby a concerned glance. Had Bobby said that he wanted to kill Sinister? He didn't know Bobby like that. "Bobby, always remember that Remy needs you. Don't take chances. Make sure you stay safe." But as he looked at Bobby, he saw a grim determination in the transparent icy eyes that hadn't been there before.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Suddenly the world took on a familiar shape. Remy frowned; he knew the room he was in! It was Bobby's! Using his last bit of strength, he managed to lock eyes with Sinister. Had the mad man found another way to torment him? Was Sinister going after Bobby and had the scientist brought him to watch? Mon Dieu, he couldn't do this! The temptation to fade in to unconsciousness almost overwhelmed him, but he resisted. "Non... don't... not Bobby." The fear that Sinister was going after Bobby almost made him nauseous.

Sinister remained quiet and placed Remy on the bed. Seeing the naked Cajun shiver, he covered Remy with the comforter. Then he looked about, realizing that some of Remy's things had already found a way in here. "Do you have serious plans with Drake?"

Remy frowned. A part of his sedated brain had trouble interpreting the question. "I did, some days ago..." Sinister locked eyes with him and Remy quickly averted them.

"You did? You don't have them any longer?" When would Remy finally start to make sense?

Remy's eyes slipped shut, losing the battle against the sedative. "He... won't want me... after... after you..."

Sinister suddenly realized what Remy was trying to say. "If he really loves you, he'll stand by you."

Remy chuckled bitterly. "You... don't believe... that yourself."

Sinister wasn't sure what to do when Remy starting sobbing softly. Back when they had been lovers, he would have taken Remy in his arms to console him. But things were different now. The best thing he could do was leave. "I lost my wife because she couldn't forgive me. I won't lose you. I'll leave you be..."

Remy heard the words and wrestled to open his eyelids. "What?"

Sinister frowned. He had thought that Remy was unconscious. Those words hadn't been meant for the Cajun's ears. "Nothing." Stepping away from the bed he headed for the tesseract. It was over now.

The door exploded in to hundreds of tiny splinters, and Remy's eyes flashed open. Panicking, he tried to sit upright, but he could hardly move. Scott and Bobby ran inside, Warren followed them, air borne.

"Get Remy out of here," yelled Bobby. "And leave Sinister alone, the bastard's mine!" Completely iced up, Bobby considered his possibilities. There had to be a way to take out Sinister! He would start with freezing the bastard.

Scott took in the scene in front of him. Remy seemed confused, trying to move, but unable to pull it off. The Cajun's pupils were dilated. Sinister probably drugged him. He wanted to take care of Remy, but Bobby was taking on Sinister! What was Bobby thinking? "Bobby, get back here!" He could blast away at Sinister, make sure he left. It was an illusion to think that they could destroy Sinister.

"No, I want him dead!" Enraged, Bobby concentrated and directed his powers at Sinister, calling up a deadly cold.

Remy had a hard time believing Bobby's words, but touching Bobby's mind told him that the other man was sincere. Mon Dieu, he couldn't let Bobby commit murder! Bobby wasn't a killer and... For some elusive reason Sinister had brought him back to the mansion. "Bobby, non, don't..." Remy called upon his strength once more, knowing he would pay a high price for it later. He managed to raise an arm and placed it on Bobby's. The cold seeped into his bones, making him shiver. "Don't kill... him."

Bobby's eyes grew big. "I can't believe you said that! Not after everything that bastard did to you!"

Seeing Remy and Bobby fight, Sinister quickly used his chance and stepped in to the tesseract. He had made the decision to return Remy to Bobby and now he had to stand by it, no matter how badly he wanted Remy. After looking at Remy's shocked face one last time, he closed the tesseract, leaving Westchester behind him.

Warren, who had watched closely, wondered about the interaction between Remy and Bobby. Bobby had told him Remy and he had become friends, but there was a strange edge to their conversation. What was he missing?

"Why did you stop me?" Bobby stared wild eyed at Remy. Anger still controlled him and steered his irrational actions. "I want him to pay for hurting you! Why did you want him to get away?"

"Bobby, cher..." Adrenaline pumped through his system, fighting the sedative. "I still love you, cher, but I don't want you to... commit murder..." Remy's eyes closed, his heart beat like mad in his chest and he began to cave in under the pressure. "Sorry..."

Bobby, still in the clutches of a red daze of intense anger, marched out of the room. Scott realized he needed to take control now. "Warren, take Remy to the Medlab and make sure Jean checks on him. I'm going after Mister Stubborn." Scott didn't waste any time and quickly followed his team-mate. "Bobby, what the hell are you doing?"

Bobby slid out of the house, needing space. He ignored Scott, who followed him. Unexpectedly, Scott's optic blast shattered his ice slide. "Fuck, Slim! What are you trying to pull? Leave me the hell alone!"

Scott hurried toward him and gritted his teeth as he grabbed Bobby. "Listen up, Robert. Remy just got back from God knows what an ordeal and you're throwing a tantrum? Grow up! You're not a kid any longer. Right now, Remy's hurting and he needs you!"

"Then why didn't he let me kill Sinister? The bastard deserved it!" Bobby was starting to calm down and the ice faded as he changed back to his normal appearance. "You saw it too, he didn't want me to kill Sinister!"

Scott hated playing the devil's advocate, or Sinister's, in this case. "Sinister returned Remy to us. Maybe we need to find out why and then your question gets answered at the same time?"

Bobby shivered, not due to the cold, which was his friend, but because he had stormed out of the room without making sure Remy was fine. He had just left his lover there... with Warren. "Oh shit, what did I do?" He needed to apologize to Remy, take care of the Cajun and make sure Warren wasn't making things worse!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remy's eyes were closed and Warren privately debated his next step. Scott had told him to take the Cajun to the Medlab and Remy looked out of it, which meant carrying him. He wasn't looking forward to this one.

His eyes scanned Bobby's room, finding two toothbrushes, two pair of slippers, some of Remy's books; it was obvious the Cajun had moved in and Bobby had let him. Why? Mystified, he headed for the bed. "Gambit? Can you hear me? I'm not carrying you to the Medlab, get your act together."

Warren's unfriendly voice penetrated the deep recesses of Remy's mind and he struggled to open his eyes. Why couldn't they just leave him alone until the sedative had worn off? And why did it have to be Warren? Why hadn't Scott stayed instead of the winged man? "Can... walk..." But he doubted he could even move his little finger.

Warren waited for Remy to get to his feet, but nothing happened. "Come on, I don't have all day!" He took a step away from the Cajun and tapped his foot. It was then when he noticed the mark which the syringe had left. Had Sinister injected something into the Cajun's neck? Curious, he bent forward and studied the little wound. Damn, why aren't you wearing any clothes? The Cajun was naked beneath the comforter!

Seeing Remy's tiny, sluggish movements, he opted for action. It was obvious that the Cajun was in no state to walk on his own. "Guess I'll be carrying you after all."

"Non! Can...walk!" He didn't want to put himself in such a vulnerable position. He didn't trust Warren to take him to the Medlab safely and he didn't need more injuries due to a premeditated fall. In the end, he somehow managed to elbow himself in a sitting position, but his legs refused to co-operate. "Just... leave me here..." Once the sedative had worn off he would make his way back to his own room. Bobby didn't want him here no more.

But Warren shook his head. "Sinister sedated you, didn't he?" He caught Remy's weak nod. "That settles it then. I might not be fond of you, thief, but I'll carry out Slim's orders..." Slowly, giving Remy time to adjust to the movement, he lifted the Cajun and started for the door. Remy's head lolled against his chest and the Cajun's hands opened and closed spasmodically. Are you fighting me? You don't stand a chance in this state. It crossed his mind that he could just dump the Cajun somewhere, but no, he was loyal to the team.

He stepped into the elevator and pressed the button that would take him to the Medlab. Frowning, he stared at the Cajun. Had Gambit lost weight? The last time that he had slammed into him during a training session Remy had seemed more solid.

"Bob...by... I'm sorry, cher... Sor...ry..."

Warren raised an eyebrow. There was that word again; cher. Why would Remy call Bobby that? Don't tell me they're dating, just don't. He had always suspected that Bobby seldom got lucky with the girls because his real preference was men, but he also knew that Bobby was in complete and utter denial. Had that changed during the last few days?

Well, that Gambit was bi was something that didn't surprise him. The Cajun lusted after everything on two legs, but Bobby? Why would Bobby fall for that?

Remy stirred and started to slip from his grip. It would have been easy to let the Cajun slip further and let him hit the floor hard, but he couldn't do that to a team-mate. "Damn it, stupid conscience!" He tightened his hold and Remy's head now rested against his shoulder. The Cajun looked oddly vulnerable while asleep in his arms. The elevator doors opened and Warren marched in to the Medlab.

"Warren, over here, please."

Warren smiled, pleasantly surprised. "Hank! I knew you'd be up and about in no time!" It felt good, seeing that his friend was getting better.

Jean also joined them and Hank immediately ran a scan on Remy.

"Thank you for bringing him in," said Jean, studying Warren closely. "I wasn't so sure you'd do it, considering how you feel about Remy."

Warren shrugged once. "He's part of the team."

Jean appreciated his loyalty; maybe a working relationship could be established between Remy and Warren.

"Oh my..." Hank cleared his throat. "Remy's completely unconscious now. I do not know what Sinister used to sedate him, but it knocked him out."

"How about his overall condition?" Jean joined Hank at the monitor.

"He seems to be in surprisingly good shape. The only thing I could find wrong with him is a burn on his thigh."

Warren looked away, embarrassed when Hank pulled away the comforter to show Jean the burn. Too much information!

"Bobby will be so relieved," muttered Hank while tending to the burn.

Warren heard the comment. "Why's that?"

Jean licked her lips, realizing how delicate the situation was. "Bobby and Remy are... dating." Hank had told her what he had learned from Bobby during these last few days.

"Dating? Dating!" Warren's face contorted. "I can understand Bobby likes guys, hey, I don't care about that, but why Gambit?"

"Love's blind," quipped Jean. "I think they're good for each other and you're not meddling, Warren."

Warren knew that tone; Jean meant business. He had to tell Betsy about Bobby and Remy and excused himself. When he approached the door, Bobby hurried toward him. Suddenly Bobby grabbed his sweater and pushed him against the wall. "Hey, Bobby, calm down!"

"Yes, Bobby, calm down." Scott rested a hand on Bobby's shoulder. "Look, Remy's here and they're taking care of him." He pointed at the sleeping Cajun.

Seeing Remy peacefully asleep calmed Bobby down. He looked at Warren, trying to figure out what was going on. "You took him to the Medlab?"

"Yeah, why not? Bobby, I don't like Gambit, but that doesn't mean I enjoy seeing him suffer." Strange, that was true. He hadn't realized that until now. "Why didn't you tell me you're interested in him?" Oops, where had that question come from? It was the last thing he wanted to address.

Bobby blushed. "It only happened a few days ago and then Sinister kidnapped him. I would have told you... eventually."

"Eventually?" echoed Warren.

"I know you don't like him, so I wasn't sure how you'd react." Bobby's eyes sought out Remy's form. "Can we talk about this later?"

"Sure." Warren exchanged a look with Scott, who looked tired and worried. "Anything else you want me to do, Slim?"

"Relief Logan from monitor duty..." Scott was relieved that Warren had kept his cool.

"I'm on it." Warren slowly left the Medlab and he looked over his shoulder when Bobby whispered Remy's name. Standing in the doorway he continued to look as Bobby claimed Remy's hand with a deep sigh.

"Remy, I've got you back. I'm sorry that I threw a tantrum... I was so mad at Sinister..."

"Robert, Remy can't hear you. He's unconsciousness." Hank reassuringly patted his friend's back. "It will be several hours before Remy wakes up again."

"Hank, can I sit with him? I feel like shit for screaming at him..."

"I don't know what you're referring to, Robert, but yes, you can stay. Just keep it quiet. Remy needs to sleep." Hank smiled and joined Scott to update his friend.

Warren averted his eyes when Bobby leaned in and gently kissed Remy's lips. Too much information.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Robert, why don't you lie down and get some sleep yourself?" Hank had watched his friend closely during the last four hours. Bobby was still clutching Remy's hand and seemed unwilling to leave the Cajun's side for even one moment.

"I'm fine, Hank, I really am, but I could do with some Twinkies." His eyes sparkled tiredly. He was overjoyed that Remy was back, but couldn't forget about his own stupidity. "I yelled at him, you know."

"Why?" Hank saw Bobby's need to talk and pulled up a chair.

"I wanted to kill Sinister, I still do, but Remy stopped me. I don't know why." Bobby stared at the floor. "I know Sinister hurt Remy, so why would he protect the bastard?"

Hank nodded once. "You're confused."

"Yes, I mean, Hank, Sinister hurt him... and yet Remy protects him. It makes no sense..." But something else was haunting Bobby. What if Sinister had managed to win Remy over? They had been lovers in the past. Maybe those screams had been screams of passion? No, he couldn't believe that, but maybe Remy still had feelings for Sinister? Oh, man, he couldn't believe that either!

Hank thought quickly. "Maybe our Cajun friend didn't want you to commit murder?"

Bobby shook his head once. "Nah, that can't be it..." He was growing desperate to change their topic. "So how are you doing? You look better."

"I feel better, thank you, Robert. The antibiotics are working and I should be one hundred percent in a few days. And yes, I am well enough to work."

"What do I do? Warren hates Remy's guts and he's one of my best friends..." Bobby's thoughts had once more drifted back to Remy. "I don't wanna choose."

"Do you really think it'll come down to that?" Hank doubted Warren would force Bobby to choose. They had been friends, team-mates, family for way too long. In the end, Warren would accept this. However, he wasn't so sure about Betsy.

"I'm scared it will. Oh man, why am I doing this to myself? I don't even know if Remy still wants me!"

Hank arched an eyebrow. "Why wouldn't he want to be with you? I thought your feelings are mutual."

"They were... But then I started yelling at him and I walked out on him... I don't know if he'll forgive me for that. He needed me and I deserted him."

"Why did you leave, Robert?" Hank kept a close eye on Remy and found that the Cajun was slowly waking up.

"I was so angry with Sinister and then Remy stops me... I was..."

Hank finished for Bobby. "You're scared that Remy no longer loves you, but why?"

Shit, he couldn't tell Hank about Remy and Nathan/Sinister being lovers. "Don't know." He shrugged, hoping Hank wouldn't pressure him. A soft moan from Remy alerted him that the Cajun was waking up. "Hank, what do I do? What do I say? How do I apologize? Will he forgive me? Fuck, I can't do this..." He almost jumped to his feet, but Remy's hand tightened around his and stopped him. Ashamed, he stared in to Remy's eyes.

Remy blinked once, twice, wondering if the sedative was now making him hallucinate. Why would Bobby be at his side? That didn't make sense. Tiredly, he closed his eyes again, but they flashed open again, realizing he was holding Bobby's hand. So Bobby was here after all. Why?

Hank intervened, seeing their confusion. Neither Bobby, nor Remy, seemed able to think rationally. "Hello there, my Cajun friend. It looks like the sedative has worn off. You might still experience some vertigo and sleepiness, but you should recover quickly. Would you like some water?"

His throat hurt and he had heard Hank's offer, but he felt unable to speak as Bobby's eyes held him prisoner. What did he read in them? What did he sense empathy wise? Mon Dieu, he was spying on Bobby, who didn't know what was going on! He quickly pulled back his empathy and forced himself to answer Hank. "Water would be bien. Merci."

"I'll get some for you. Robert here will keep you company while I'm gone." Hank discretely left, intent on returning with the water after the two of them had talked.

Alone with Remy now, Bobby cleared his throat. Man, he really didn't know how to start. Maybe Remy would forgive him if he started with an apology. "Remy..."

"Bobby..." They spoke simultaneously, but Remy was the one who grew silent, giving Bobby a chance to speak first. Even though he had complete control over his empathy, he could still feel Bobby's distress.

Bobby left his chair and knelt on the floor next to Remy's bed. He claimed both the Cajun's hands and rubbed them gently. He took a moment to think about what he wanted to say and then met Remy's eyes. "Remy, I'm so sorry."

Remy frowned. "What are you sorry for?" Bobby hadn't done anything wrong! He understood perfectly that Bobby didn't want him after he had handed himself over to Sinister.

"For yelling at you like that. I just couldn't believe that you wanted me to spare Sinister. Why? He hurt you!" Bobby was losing his calm again, but this time he stayed in control of his feelings.

Remy moistened his chapped lips. "Bobby, I felt your rage, but I also felt him. I couldn't let you commit murder. You're much too special to take a life. I don't want you to carry that burden for the rest of your life."

"I would gladly carry that burden if it meant knowing you safe!" Bobby's voice carried great determination. "I won't let him hurt you ever again, Remy."

Remy managed a weak smile. "Means a lot to me, hearing that, Bobby." Now he felt truly confused. Why was Bobby apologizing for yelling at him? Bobby had had every right to be angry with him!

"Make me a promise? Please, Remy?" Bobby looked at Remy pleadingly.

"What?" Had he felt confused before? Now he felt lost and mystified.

"I... know what you let Sinister do in order to get Hank and I out. Promise me to never do it again? I don't want you to go through that kinda pain for me." Bobby's heart contracted, seeing Remy grow pale. "Don't get me wrong, I know why you did, but I... Damn, this isn't coming out right. I just wish I could have gotten you out, before..."

Remy purely acted on instinct. "I did it because I needed to know you safe. I didn't want Sinister to grow interest in you... in that way. I had to get you out and Hank was ill and..."

Bobby released a deep breath. "Can you forgive me, Remy?" He changed his position and sat down on the side of the bed.

"Forgive you? I'm the one who needs to ask for..." The shock in Bobby's eyes took his breath away.

"I'm not mad with you, Remy. You went to Sinister willingly because you wanted to save our lives... The only thing I didn't understand until now was why you wouldn't let me kill him. I'm so sorry for walking out on you. I deserted you when you needed me." Bobby lowered his eyes. "Please forgive me for walking out on you. I should have stayed with you. Instead Warren had to take you to the Medlab."

Now things were starting to make sense to Remy. "Cher, there's nothing to forgive. I understand that you were upset." A little spark of hope began to burn inside his heart. Maybe he hadn't lost Bobby yet? "Cher, please forgive me as well?"

"What for?" Bobby sighed deeply and then moved closer to Remy. He rested his back against the wall and he held his breath as Remy moved in to his arms.

"I didn't want him to touch me, but what could I do? I didn't want to be with him in that way... I..." He felt miserable, but Bobby was still here, against all odds.

"I'm sorry I couldn't stop him. I'm sorry you got hurt, love. Are you still hurting? Is there anything Hank can do to make you more comfortable?" Bobby finally touched Remy's hair, stroked the silky locks gently.

"Non, I'm bien. Just very tired." Now that he knew they were okay, fatigue was sneaking up on him again.

"Then close your eyes and go to sleep, Remy."

"You'll stay?" Remy closed his eyes, cuddled closer to Bobby and relaxed.

"Yeah, of course I'll stay..." Bobby smiled, tucked Remy's head beneath his chin and pressed a kiss on the Cajun's hair. "I love you..."

Remy smiled, quickly dozing off. "Je t'aime, cher... Mon Dieu, so tired..."

"It's okay, Remy... Just go to sleep." The Cajun relaxed against him and the steady breathing told Bobby that Remy had fallen asleep. He looked up when Hank arrived with the water.

"Did you talk, Robert?"

"Yeah, we're fine, Hank... Oh, I missed him so much... I didn't know love could feel like this."

Hank smiled. "Treasure love, Robert. Treasure it." Satisfied that the young lovers were fine, he returned to his office. He needed to update Scott and the professor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Are you comfortable?" Bobby fussed over Remy when installing the Cajun in his bed. He pulled the comforter over Remy, who was wearing sweats to keep warm.

Remy smiled. "Oui, cher, I'm bien." He had been relieved when Hank had told him that he could leave the Medlab, but not before Hank had questioned him about the burns on his thigh. He had lied his way out of it, but Bobby hadn't been fooled that easily. Bobby had waited until they were alone and had pleaded with him to never burn himself again. He had been hesitant to promise Bobby that, but the other man had pushed him until he had vowed to talk to Bobby when he got too stressed.

"Anything you want? Something to eat? Drink? Hot chocolate maybe?" Bobby stood back, looked at his handiwork and grinned. Remy resembled a mummy, wrapped up in the comforter like that.

"A shot of Bourbon?" Remy grinned, seeing Bobby shook his head. "Thought so."

Bobby sat down on the side of the bed and studied Remy's face. The Cajun was doing extremely well, even surprising Hank with his quick recovery. "Remy, there's something I need to talk to you about."

Remy instantly turned seriously. "Cher?" He sensed Bobby's discomfort; something definitely worried his lover.

Bobby cleared his throat, averted his eyes and played with a corner of the comforter. "When you and Sinister had sex I heard you scream."

Remy swallowed hard; he didn't want to discuss this with his lover. It made him feel awkward. "I thought we'd covered that?"

"He forced you, didn't you?" Bobby hesitantly made eye contact.

Remy immediately looked away, stared at the wall. "Oui."

"What does that mean for us? Can I still touch you?" Bobby hated how selfish that sounded. "I mean..."

"I know what you mean, cher." Remy forced himself to return Bobby's shy glance. "It might be awkward for a while, but I want to be with you in that way... in time."

Bobby felt relieved. "Anything I should look out for? Shouldn't do?"

"Non, I'm bien. Just give me some time."

"You'll get all the time you need, love." Bobby blushed. He was still getting used to calling Remy love.

"Why don't you join me in bed, cher? We can cuddle, watch your cartoons and... "

"Rest. You're gonna rest. We're not doing anything else." Bobby removed his jeans and sweater and slipped into bed wearing a shirt and boxers. Remy's arms opened and he snuggled up to his lover. "I'm so glad you're back."

"Me too," admitted Remy in an emotional tone. Hugging Bobby close, he hoped Sinister would leave him alone in the future.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Charles sipped his tea, considering Scott's question. "You're right, Scott. Remy still feels like he doesn't belong here, isn't wanted here. We need to change that, find a way to reunite this family." Scott had shown up in his study rather unexpectedly, wanting to talk to him about Remy.

Scott nodded once. "I don't want to repeat past mistakes, sir. Remy asked if he could move back in to the boathouse when Hank released him, luckily Bobby changed Remy's mind, but it showed me that our Cajun still doesn't feel welcome."

"He doesn't know that we were ready to get him out. Remy assumes nothing has changed." Charles stared into the hot tea, imagining he saw Remy's face in the swirls. "Maybe I know of a way..."

Scott shifted on his chair. "What way, sir?"

"We need to make this official so Remy knows we're serious."

"Yes, sir, but how?"

Charles put down his cup of tea. "Remy needs to trust again and we need to unite the family. I propose that every team member visits and talks to Remy, maybe give him a token of their friendship."

Scott nodded once. "That would make things more intimate, more private. It would give people some closure. But will everyone participate?"

Charles realized whom Scott was referring to. "I think Warren will, but I'm not so sure about Betsy."

"And Rogue when she gets back. I doubt she'll want to make that commitment."

"We'll just have to wait and see." Charles hoped this would work. "I'll talk to the team, let them know about our idea and then we'll see what happens."

Scott rose from his chair and walked over to the doorway. "Jean and I will participate."

"I know you will," said Charles, smiling gently. He only anticipated problems with Warren and Betsy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Uhm, did I understand you correctly? You want me to go to Gambit and make my peace with him?" Warren frowned. "It's more like he owns me an apology for what he did."

"And what's that?" Charles kept one eye on Warren, who was at least considered his request, and one on Betsy, who hadn't said a single word yet. She seemed disinterested and he doubted so would comply so he doubled his efforts to convince Warren.

"Working for Sinister, leading the Marauders in to those tunnels, where..." Warren swallowed hard. A lump formed in his throat, keeping him from finishing his sentence.

"Where your wings were damaged." Charles nodded, understanding what Warren was struggling with. "Remy made mistakes in the past, I can't and won't deny that, but you made your share of mistakes as well, Warren. You can't judge him without judging yourself. I never understood why Remy had to carry all the blame and guilt, while you carry some yourself. Why pick on Remy? Logan made his mistakes so did Scott. I never sensed you condemn them, but you do condemn Remy."

Busted. Warren drew in a deep breath. "I just don't like him."

"Why?" Charles noticed that Betsy had left the room. Apparently she wasn't interested in making her peace with Remy.

Warren didn't want to get in to this. He had a hard time labeling his feelings. "I don't know, sir. Maybe it's because he's the exact opposite of me."

Charles raised an eyebrow, realizing that Warren was trying to get away from the subject. He decided to let him. "You know what I want you to do. Will you talk to Remy or not?"

Warren fought his own inner battle and barely heard the professor. "I'm not sure."

"Think about it, Warren. We always were a team, a family. Here's one who needs a family more than anything. Ask yourself if you can watch his back in battle, if you trust him to watch yours..." Charles steered his wheelchair toward the doorway. "Bobby's going first, then Scott and Jean will follow. Hank and Logan also agreed to my plan. I doubt Betsy will participate, but I'd hate to lose you. Remember, Bobby considers you one of his best friends. Are you willing to lose all that?" Charles left then, hoping Warren would make the right decision.

Warren stared at the wall for a long time, then unfolded his feather wings, opened a window and took to the sky.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bobby hoped that Charles' plan would work. During the last forty-eight hours Remy had been mostly asleep, waking up to eat a bite and take a shower. Maybe sending everyone up to talk to the Cajun was pushing it. Well, they would find out quickly enough. It was now up to him to explain to Remy what was going to happen and why.

"Hey, Remy, you're awake yet?" Bobby smiled at the man in his arms. Remy yawned, stretched and nodded his head. "Good, because there's something you need to know."

"What, cher?"

"The professor has this... plan. He wants us to welcome you to our little family." Remy grew pale and that worried Bobby. "Don't worry about it, it'll be cool. Everyone's coming up to talk to you and give you a little welcoming present."

Remy's eyes narrowed; he obviously didn't trust Charles' plan. "Not good."

"Why?"

Remy sighed deeply. "Cher, I'm happy with you. I don't need the others."

"You're part of the team," reminded Bobby Remy. "And I'm going first."

Remy realized Bobby was serious and couldn't be stopped. "What do you want me to do?"

"Can you get comfortable on the couch?" Remy would probably feel uncomfortable lying in bed when everyone came to visit.

"Sure..." Remy got to his feet and sank down on the couch. He shivered, growing cold now that he missed the warm comforter. He smiled when Bobby covered him with a blanket. "Merci, cher. I'd be lost without you."

Bobby grinned and sat down next to Remy. "Okay, here we go."

Remy tensed, uncertain what to expect. What nonsense had Charles put in to everyone's head? And why were they willing to go through with this? "Bobby, cher?"

"Please let me do this, Remy?" Bobby turned his puppy dog look on Remy, drew in a deep breath and claimed Remy's hands. "When Storm brought you to the mansion I wasn't sure what to make of it. I liked having some young around, hoping we could connect and get up to some mischief, but things changed radically after the trial. I treated you with distrust, not sure what to think of your involvement with Sinister. Then Rogue told us you had died at Antarctica, only you turned up later at the mansion and you moved back in to the boathouse. I never realized I was attracted to you, until then."

Remy's eyes grew watered. "Bobby..."

"No, listen." Bobby gently squeezed Remy's hands. "I'm not afraid to say I love you, not anymore. I was at the beginning. I'm proud to have you as my lover and... there's only one thing that worries me."

"Sinister?" Remy's stomach contracted painfully.

"No, you using your powers to hurt yourself. You have to stop doing that. Talk to me when you're stressed."

"I already promised you that..."

Bobby nodded once. "And I hope you'll keep your word. Remy, I love you, I want to get to know you better. I'll accept whatever past you'll reveal to me. Just don't ever shut me out. I love you."

Remy cleared his throat. "Bobby, cher, I love you too..."

"I also got a present for you. It's not much, but... I want you to have it." Bobby released Remy's hands and ice formed in the palm of his hand.

Awed, Remy watched, then smiled, recognizing the two men Bobby had formed with his powers. "It's a shame it'll melt."

"It won't." Bobby blushed. "It's gonna stay like this forever." He placed the ice sculpture on the window sill behind Remy. "Do you like it?" He had done his best to make the resemblance work.

"Love it, cher." Touched, Remy stared at their icy counterparts. Holding each other close, the ice sculpture was beautiful. "I'll always treasure it."

Bobby leaned in closer and claimed Remy's lips. They hadn't gone any further than kissing and cuddling, and they would know when they were ready to take the final step.

A soft knock on the door disturbed their kissing. "That's Scott and Jean," whispered Bobby.

"Don't leave me alone with them?"

"Sorry, love, but you should talk to them in private. I'll be back once everyone talked to you." He didn't want to let Remy go, but the knock sounded again. "I'll be back shortly, I promise." He checked one more time if Remy was warm and comfortable and then headed for the doorway. "They want you here and this is their way of letting you know. Just listen to them, okay?"

Remy nodded, uncertain if his vocal chords were still working, overwhelmed by sudden emotion. Bobby opened the door and stepped aside to let Scott and Jean enter. Remy instinctively lowered his eyes, avoiding looking at them. He didn't want Bobby to leave, but when the door closed, he sensed that his lover was no longer in the same room.

"Remy?" Jean approached first, closely followed by her husband. "Can we talk to you?"

Well, it wasn't like he had a choice in the matter! Remy cringed when Scott pulled up a chair and Jean sat down next to him. Hopefully this was over quickly!

"Remy? Look at us?" Jean slowly closed her fingers around Remy's, and exchanged a worried look with her husband. Remy seemed distant and withdrawn.

Remy knew better than to fight Jean and looked at her.

"Thank you." Jean smiled and even Scott managed a smile.

"Remy?" Scott nodded once, telling Jean that he wanted to go first and she let him. "Remy, I'm sorry that I didn't check on you when Rogue left you behind at Antarctica. I don't know what was wrong with me! I get so mad at myself, knowing I left you there!"

Remy frowned. "Cyke?" That wasn't what he had expected to hear! He had thought they would lecture him about Sinister, the tunnels and all the other mistakes he had made.

"Scott's serious," said Jean gently. "We both regret not going back. I promise you we won't make the same mistake twice."

Scott nodded firmly. "We're sorry, Remy. Sorry that we never tried to make you part of this family. The others would have followed if I had tried harder. The question is, are you going to give me a second chance to make this work?"

Remy's confusion grow stronger. "It wasn't your fault. I should have come clean earlier, but I was scared. I knew you'd kick me out once you knew the truth."

"Damn it." Scott bit his lip. "You're probably right, but maybe we should look at the future instead? Make a new start?"

Jean smiled reassuringly. "The X-Men are a family and we used to take care of each other. We failed you in the past."

Remy was speechless. "Don't know... what to say."

"I hope that's a yes?" Scott grinned pleased. "I really want to make this work."

"And so do I." Jean smiled as well, then uncovered something from a pocket. "We want you to have this."

Remy stared at the picture. It had been taken at Jean's birthday a few years ago when things had been all right. They had tolerated him, had started to accept him, but then...

"I know that we can't take your real family's place," said Jean softly, "But we can try to replace them as long as you're here."

A lump formed in Remy's throat. "Mon Dieu... Jean...Cyke..." He really didn't know what to say. They had completely surprised him. He barely refrained from pulling away when Scott placed a hand on his arm. "Cyke?"

"My name's Scott, Remy. I know I didn't call you Remy in the past either... maybe we can change that too?"

"Maybe... Scott." Remy clutched the framed picture and his eyes were drawn to Bobby's ice sculpture. He was quickly gaining friends.

Jean caught the direction of his glance. "They would go nicely together."

Remy took the hint and placed the picture next to the sculpture. "Merci..." His voice trembled with emotion.

Jean realized that Remy needed a moment to compose himself. "Come on, Scott, we're leaving. We'll see Remy at dinner later."

Scott and Jean rose and smiled warmly. Remy had never felt this confused before and he returned their smiles, feeling shy. What had just happened?

The door closed behind the couple and Remy rested his head against a pillow. Mon Dieu, he was glad this one was over! Another knock on the door startled him. "Oh non, mon Dieu, now what?"

"Gumbo? Are ya in there? We need to talk."

"Logan..." Remy gulped.

Logan simply opened the door, not waiting for Remy's permission. "Yer lookin' betta, Cajun."

Remy involuntarily tried to move to the other end of the couch when Logan sank down beside him. "Something wrong?" Why else would Logan be here?

"Charlie convinced me to talk to ya, so that's why I'm here. I don't do speeches, bub, so..." Logan had to admit that Remy looked better. The Cajun was recovering quickly, which pleased him. It was good to know that Sinister had failed to break the young Cajun. "Charlie mentioned talkin' to ya and givin' ya somethin' personal." He uncovered his dog tags. "Here, kid, I want ya to have them. Ya showed a lot of courage, but we never really acknowledged it. I remember when I got here, I hated everyone. Now I play poker, laugh and made friends. I hope we can become good friends as well."

Remy stared at the dog tags in his hands. The metal felt cold to the touch. "I can't accept them, mon ami. They remind you of the past..."

"A past that consists of false memories. I rather make new ones." Logan grinned, bared his teeth and patted Remy on the shoulder. "Welcome home, kid."

His empathy told Remy that Logan was more emotional than the Canadian wanted him to know and he didn't hold Logan back when the older man made his way over to the door. "Merci, Logan."

Logan nodded and quickly left. It wasn't like him to show his emotions.

Remy caressed the dog tags with his fingertips. Why had Logan given him something that personal? Another knock echoed through the room. "Mon Dieu, non, enough!"

"Remy? Are you up to entertaining more visitors? I can come back later..." Hank didn't want to tire Remy.

"Henri?" Remy arched an eyebrow. He had thought that Logan had been the last one to visit him! "You can come inside, mon ami."

Hank entered, smiled and sat down on the chair Scott had pulled up to the couch. "How are you doing, Remy? You look tired."

"I'm bien, Henri. What are you doing here?"

Hank's smile faded. "I want to ask for your forgiveness."

"What?" Remy felt shocked. "You didn't do anything wrong!"

"I left you behind at Antarctica."

"You were wounded!"

"That's no excuse," said Hank firmly. "I should have told them to turn the Blackbird around and collect you." He had felt guilty ever since Antarctica.

Remy sensed that guilt. "Don't do this to yourself, Henri. You did the best you could. I don't blame you for a thing!" Suddenly Hank took hold of his hands.

"Remy, I didn't want to leave you behind and my failure has been tormenting me ever since. I'm so sorry I didn't come back for you. Please forgive me."

Remy wanted to assure Hank once more that he had done nothing wrong, but sensed how deep Hank's feelings of guilt were. Only forgiveness would help Hank heal. Although he still felt there was nothing to forgive, he nodded. "I forgive you, Henri." He sensed the relief that floated through Hank upon hearing those words and they laughed nervously.

"And now for my gift." Hank grinned wickedly, and then placed a few Twinkies in Remy's lap. "I hope you like them. And by the way, you're welcome to join Bobby and I when we'll go on our next midnight Twinkie Run."

Remy smiled, knowing what a privilege that was. Not even Warren was allowed to go on a Twinkie Run! "Merci, Henri, don't know what to say." Everything overwhelmed him and the surprises didn't seem to end.

"I'll leave you alone now. Looks to me like there's a lot you need to digest. I'll see you at dinner." Hank carefully enfolded Remy in his long arms, hugged the Cajun and then left quietly.

Remy sat reeling from that hug. Hank had never hugged him before. Smiling at the Twinkies, he considered eating one. His stomach was hungry for something sweet. He leaned back, pulled up the comforter to his shoulders and relaxed. Hank had been the last. He would have some peace and quiet now... that was until Bobby returned! Maybe he could even nap for a few minutes!

His eyes flashed open, hearing a knock on his door that shouldn't have been there. "Bobby?"

"No, it's I, Warren."

Warren? Merde, shit, fuck... Remy almost panicked. What did Warren want? Why wasn't Bobby here when he needed him?

"Can we talk, Gambit?"

Remy shivered. Warren always sounded so cold, and he was inclined to tell Warren no, but then his empathy reached out. His eyes grew big, sensing Warren's nervousness. Even some regret seemed mixed in. Before he knew it, he had said, "Oui," and the door opened.

Remy wished he knew why Warren had come here. Was it coincidence or had Charles talked the winged man in to doing this?

Warren shuffled his feet, stalled and then headed for the chair. "Can I sit down?"

Remy nodded nervously.

"I can't believe I'm actually here," said Warren absentmindedly. "Bets isn't coming. She thinks this is stupid."

Remy was surprised to feel that Warren disagreed with his girlfriend. "And you don't think it's stupid?"

Warren shrugged. "I thought about it for a long time and I guess Scott and Charles are right. We can only make this work if we trust each other."

"You trust me?" Remy sounded stunned.

Warren still didn't meet the alien eyes. "I think so. I have my reasons why I don't like you, but you never let down the team in the past. You even watched my back in fights. I blamed you for the Massacre for a long time, but I'm not so sure anymore. The other thing I blamed you for were my wings, but Scott set me straight on that one some time ago. You didn't cost me my wings."

Remy held his breath, wondering where Warren was taking this.

"What I'm saying is that I'm willing to start all over again. I just hope you don't have more skeletons in your closet."

Remy flinched. Mon Dieu, what would happen if Warren ever found out about Nathan/Sinister? Should he tell Warren? Non. "What do you want from me?"

"I want us to try again... Well, I doubt we ever tried, but we should, for Bobby's sake."

Remy felt light-headed. "I didn't think you'd accept us being together like that."

"I'm surprising myself," muttered Warren absentmindedly. "Do you want to try? If not, the deal's off."

"I'll try," said Remy, quickly reassuring Warren. "I want to try." It would mean a lot to Bobby if he tried.

"I'm also supposed to give you something." Warren reached in to a pocket and uncovered a feather. "You can call it a peace offering."

"Is it one of yours?" Remy almost reverently accepted the feather.

"Yeah, lost it this morning..." Warren got to his feet, feeling tired and mentally exhausted.

"Warren?" Remy gingerly made eye contact. "Forgive me?"

Warren waited patiently.

"I'm sorry your wings got damaged. I'm sorry I never told the whole truth, but I already felt unwelcome and I was scared that there were no second chances." His heart beat in his throat and cold sweat formed all over his body. "I never wanted anyone to get hurt."

"I believe you," said Warren slowly. "I guess it's okay... You're not the only one who made mistakes. The professor reminded me of a few of my own."

"You forgive me?" Hearing the words was important to Remy, who had tensed up during their conversation.

"Yeah, you're forgiven... Now I need some time to think..." Warren headed for the door.

Remy nodded, cherishing the feather in his hands. He waited until Warren had left the room and then whispered, "I won't let them down, never again."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Remy, are you okay?" Bobby hurried back to Remy's room when he heard that Warren had talked to Remy as well. Fearing the worst, he quickly joined Remy, who had stretched out on the couch.

"Bien," whispered Remy softly. "Look what Wings gave me." Although he had received several gifts today, he cherished the feather the most. "He forgave me."

Bobby understood. "And you feel better now?"

"Oui, way better..." Remy grinned. "Dinner ready yet? I'm hungry."

"Yeah, it's ready and Jean cooked, so it's gonna taste great." Bobby smiled, kissed Remy and caressed the Cajun's face. "I love you, Remy."

Remy suddenly choked up, realizing just how serious Bobby was. "Je t'aime, Bobby..."

Bobby grinned relieved. "Let's eat and then..."

"And then we can cuddle some more?"

"Maybe even do more than cuddle," hinted Bobby.

"I'd love that." Remy looked into his lover's brown eyes and realized this wasn't the end, this was a new beginning.

Epilogue

"Where are you going, Remy? It's the dead of night." Bobby popped himself up on his elbows to study his lover. Remy had slipped into jeans, a warm sweatshirt and was now putting on his boots. "Are you going outside? Want me to come with you?" Although Hank had proclaimed Remy fully recovered, Bobby couldn't help fussing over the Cajun. Remy deserved all the tender loving care he could get.

"Don't worry about it, cher. I just need some fresh air. Can't sleep and I wanted to go for a walk." Remy pleadingly met Bobby's eyes. If Bobby insisted, he would allow his lover to tag along, but he really wanted some private time to think and then there was this odd sensation tugging at his mind, urging him closer.

Bobby understood Remy's need to be alone. An awful lot had happened to Remy these last few days and the Cajun needed to sort out his thoughts, but that didn't mean he was happy sending Remy off alone. He would have preferred to accompany his lover. "Sure, Remy, go ahead. Don't take too long, love? Bed gets awfully cold without you to keep me warm."

Remy blushed slightly. At times it was hard to accept that Bobby and he were together. Things were so much different from the way they had been when Rogue and he had been a couple. "I'll be back soon," he promised.

Bobby gave him a wink, letting Remy know that everything was okay and closed his eyes again. He really was tired.

Remy sneaked out of the room, not wanting to disturb Bobby who was slowly falling asleep. Making sure nobody noticed him, he slipped on to the roof. He inhaled the fresh air deeply, loving the feeling of freedom that coursed though him. He couldn't resist temptation and went through some of his training sequences, making somersaults, unfolding his bo staff, running and eventually jumping off the roof. He landed on his feet and a smile surfaced on his face. "Still got that special touch..." Guild training had been thorough!

He walked over to a tree and sat down, leaning his back against it. There was a full moon tonight and the stars sparkled brightly; it was a beautiful night and briefly he regretted not taking Bobby with him. This would have been a romantic moment had Bobby been with him, in his arms to be exact.

"Remy?"

The voice completely surprised him and startled, he jumped to his feet. He spun around, opened his bo staff once more and charged it with kinetic energy. He gritted his teeth, finding Sinister in front of him. How was it possible that the security system hadn't kicked in yet? Scott had modified it, hoping it would pick up tesseracts, even outside of the mansion. "What do you want?" He kept his charged bo staff protectively in front of him.

Remy's heart contracted painfully when Sinister used his abilities to change his appearance. His former lover Nathan was now staring back at him and Remy had to remind himself that it was just Sinister playing him. "Get out of my life, Sinister."

Sinister sighed deeply. "I do not wish to fight. I came here to apologize."

Remy's eyes narrowed. "And you expect me to believe that?"

"I let you go, didn't I?" Sinister studied Remy closely. The Cajun seemed fully recovered and the sparkle was back in the red on black eyes. "You may not believe me, but I do love you."

Remy laughed bitterly. "You're right, I don't believe you. I still can't believe I ever fell for this charade. You probably had a great time playing me like that. The worst thing is that I really cared about you."

Sinister wanted to shake some sense in to Remy, but stayed where he was. He didn't dare approach Remy. The Cajun looked ready to explode at the slightest threats. "I'm sorry, Remy. I hurt you and that was never my intention. I wanted you back. I wanted to relive the time we had together. We were happy back then."

"You played me. You gave me what you thought I wanted." Remy pointed at Sinister's changed appearance. "I fell in love with Nathan, who was just a lie. You can't have me, because I never belonged to you." His empathy picked up on several confused emotions, which emanated from Sinister. His empathy must have wakened and strengthened them. "I loved Nathan, I never loved you and now I love Bobby."

Sinister nodded weakly. "I lost you... I handled this really badly." He finally understood his folly.

"I moved on, you should do the same," whispered Remy emotionally. Regret and a sense of intense lose radiated from Sinister. He hadn't thought it possible, but the scientist was speaking the truth; the confusion and regret was real. "I'm sorry too," he added in the end.

"I won't try to win your love again. I know when I'm beaten." He had watched Remy these last few days, had seen how happy the Cajun was with Bobby. "I won't come after you again. I'll leave you alone."

Remy had to admit that Sinister hadn't screwed with his mind since the scientist had returned him to the mansion. "I wish I could believe you."

"I'll prove it to you," promised Sinister. He took one step closer and felt encouraged when Remy didn't move away from him. "I also regret taking you against your will."

Remy paled. "I don't want to talk about that." It was something he managed to lock out most of the time. He knew he had to deal with it in time, but not yet. First he needed to build a stronger relationship with Bobby. Once he completely trusted Bobby, he could let himself fall, knowing Bobby would catch him.

"I'm still sorry. All I could think about was that you were in my bed again after all this time." Sinister shook his head. "I'll make things up to you."

"You can't," said Remy in a cold tone. "You crossed a line when you..." His voice trailed off. He had thought seeing Sinister as Nathan wouldn't hurt this much, but it did. He had shared good years with this man, only to find out he had been played. "I want you to leave me alone, me and Bobby. Don't come near him."

Sinister heard the very real threat in Remy's voice. "I'll respect your decision." Remy wouldn't believe him, no matter what he said or did. "I still hope you'll find it in your heart one day to forgive me. I never wanted to hurt you, just to love you and have you close again." Sinister hesitated momentarily. "I watched the others come in to talk to you and it seemed a good idea at the time."

Remy arched an eyebrow. It didn't surprise him that Sinister was watching him. "What do you want?" He decharged the bo staff, but kept it extended, just in case Sinister would attack after all.

"To give you this." Sinister uncovered a small package and handed it to Remy, who was reluctant to accept it.

"What is it?" He was very wary of Sinister bearing gifts. Remy hesitantly removed the box. His heart missed a beat. "Why?" He stared at the picture, several years old, sitting in a frame he had personally selected. It showed him happier times, when he had been living with Nathan. Both men were smiling, hugging, fooling around in front of the camera of a friend who had taken the picture at one of Remy's birthday's party which Nathan had thrown for him. Looking at it now gave him the creeps, but still... It still reminded him of the love he had felt for this man. "Why give me this?"

Sinister actually felt awkward. The others had given Remy something and he had thought it was a good idea. He had selected this picture for a reason, hoping Remy might remember the good times they had shared. "Would you keep it? You don't have to show it to anyone, but it would mean a lot to me if you kept it." This had been a bad idea. Remy would never forgive him. Absentmindedly, he changed back to his armor and started to walk away from the Cajun who looked lost in thought.

"Wait..." Remy privately cursed his empathy for letting him feel Sinister's emotions. True regret was seeping through, laced with a hint of love and melancholy. Sinister turned around and Remy forced himself to lock eyes with him. "What do you really want?"

Sinister had never felt this nervous in his life. "I hope that one day you can forgive me."

Forgiveness... Hank had wanted to be forgiven and he in turn had begged Warren to forgive him. Now Sinister wanted forgiveness as well. He had forgiven Hank and Warren had forgiven him, could he do any less for Sinister? They had all made mistakes, as Warren pointed out to him. "I don't know if I can do that yet," Remy whispered. "But I don't hate you... Maybe in time I can learn to forgive you."

Sinister nodded once. It was all he could hope for. "Thank you." He opened a tesseract and stepped inside.

Remy swallowed hard when Sinister disappeared in to the tesseract. Beneath the armor he had seen a glimpse of the man he had once loved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Argh! You're cold!" Bobby shivered when Remy spooned up behind him.

"Then warm me up, cher."

"Wicked Cajun!" Bobby grinned, dozing off once more.

Remy smiled, enfolded Bobby in his arms and whispered, "Je t'aime, Bobby..."

The End

October 2002