Author: Hergerbabe
Email: hergerbabe@yahoo.co.uk
Fandom: Smallville
Pairing: Clark/Lex
Rating: NC-17
Category: angst, romance
Sequel/Series: Sequel to Clueless, starts the day after Clueless finishes
Archive: list archive
Notes: Anything after the episode Hug does not exist in this fic, except for parts of Leech, which I’ve seriously messed about with.
Warnings: underage sex, rape, violence
Disclaimer: nope, still not mine
Summary: The past catches up with both Clark and Lex
For Christine and Caroline, thanks for the encouragement :)
Clueless 2: Clued Up
by Hergerbabe
"Clark?"
Clark rolled over in his bed and sighed. "Coming, Mom," he called, feeling a distinct lack of enthusiasm. When they’d got in the previous night, Clark had already gone to bed, and he’d been glad of the day to himself, despite it giving him too much time to brood.
Only the fact that he had a weekend’s worth of chores and that he didn’t know when to expect his parents had stopped him from just running over to Lex’s. Of course, his chores had taken all of ten minutes, so he’d cleaned the entire house, twice, done the laundry, fixed every single inch of fence that could possibly need fixing and still he’d had far too much time to brood.
"Clark! Come on, your breakfast is getting cold, honey."
"Sorry, Mom, be right down." Clark sighed again and zipped through showering and dressing, before hurrying down to the kitchen. His mother and father looked at him curiously and he plastered a smile across his face. "Hey, Mom, Dad, did you have a nice weekend?"
"Yes, Clark, it was lovely, thank you," Martha smiled up at him and he leaned down to kiss her cheek. "Did you have a nice time?"
He grinned genuinely at her, hearing the underlying question, "Yes, Mom, don’t worry, I learnt my lesson after last time. I just spent the night in the loft, watched the stars." Clark trailed off, managing to keep his smile in place as he remembered the only stars he’d seen were behind his eyelids each time he and Lex had made love.
He sighed, staring down at his breakfast.
Martha and Jonathan Kent exchanged confused, slightly concerned glances.
"Clark?" Martha asked gently, "Did something happen?"
"No!" Clark exclaimed, then winced as he realised he’d spoken much too fast and far too loudly. "I mean, nothing weird anyway." They were still staring. Clark sighed. "I had an argument with Lex, and it’s just… I *know* I’m right, but he just won’t listen."
"Oh, sweetheart. Sometimes friendships are like that," Martha started.
"Yeah, especially with a Luthor." Jonathan mumbled, getting glares from both his wife and his son. He rolled his eyes and stood up. "I’m sure he’ll get over himself when he remembers you’re the only friend he’s got," he said as he left the house.
Clark sighed again and shoved his breakfast away. He’d lost his appetite, his father’s comment just reminding him how irrevocably things had changed.
"Sweetheart?" Martha frowned in concern.
"I’ll be fine, Mom," Clark assured her hurriedly, he didn’t want to answer any awkward questions, "I’ll go see him tonight, okay?"
She nodded warily, "I’m sure you’ll both sort it out. I mean look at you and Lana after the problems with Kyle."
"This is a little more serious, Mom," Clark said quietly, leaving the house.
Martha sat back in surprise. If it was more serious than an argument with *Lana*, then it must be really serious. She wondered a little worriedly if it had anything to do with Clark’s gifts. She knew Clark hated lying to his friends, and he considered Lex his best friend.
Quickly, she got up and hurried after him, but he’d already gone.
@>*~
Lex was up and dressed even earlier than usual. Hardly surprising considering he’d barely slept. It wasn’t easy to get thoughts of Clark out of his head when every time he moved, he could feel a slight, pleasant burn in his ass from having Clark inside him. And every time he felt it, he vividly remembered every touch, every kiss, every sigh.
But unfortunately, the world didn’t revolve around his heartbreak and he didn’t have the luxury of brooding. Hopefully, the satisfaction of today’s meeting would take his mind off the rest of his life.
And hopefully, his father’s pleasure at the coming success would offset the coming confrontation. After all, he wasn’t so naïve as to believe Jeff wouldn’t go running straight to his father.
Lex forced himself to sort out his paperwork then made a phone call to book a suite at a hotel for the night. There was no way he could face staying the night in his apartment, not yet. His bag was packed and already in the car and with a sigh, he drove away from Smallville again. He tried to ignore the feeling that he was running away. After all, the meeting had been scheduled for two weeks.
@>*~
Clark stood and stared at his open locker blankly. It had been a very long day and he’d been constantly preoccupied thinking about Lex. It had been hard work not to go over that weekend again and again in his mind; not to imagine Lex moving against him, in him, him in Lex. But the fear of getting a hard on in school had helped.
It hadn’t stopped him from worrying about Lex, and what he was going to say.
"Okay, what gives?"
"Huh?" Clark blinked and turned to see Pete and Chloe staring at him.
"You’ve been staring at your locker for ten minutes," Chloe raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah, and you’ve been acting weird all day, man," Pete nodded.
Clark sighed, "I just have a lot on my mind."
"What, more than usual?" Pete chuckled. Clark shrugged.
"Nothing to do with the lovely Lana?" Chloe asked, only slightly sarcastically.
"No," Clark answered tightly, "Not everything revolves around Lana."
"Oh, you do surprise me," Chloe snorted.
Clark stared over their heads, trying to calculate how long it would be before he could see Lex again.
"Clark, man, what is up with you?" Pete frowned at him, then glanced at Chloe who shrugged.
"I’m fine, really," Clark tried to assure them.
"Is it Lex?" Chloe asked.
"What?!" Clark snapped, "Why do you say that?"
"Geez, pardon me I’m sure," she raised her hands. "Process of elimination. If it’s not Lana, and I’m pretty sure it’s not us, well, Clark, you don’t have any other friends."
"Oh gee, thanks for that," Clark grimaced.
"Oh, come on, Clark, I didn’t mean it like that," she said apologetically.
"Whatever," Clark shook his head and slammed his locker shut. "Look, I gotta go. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?"
They nodded, staring at him like he’d grown a second head. He could feel them staring after him as he walked away, and he couldn’t bring himself to care.
@>*~
Lex watched a triumphant Sir Harry Hardwick and a slightly awkward Victoria leave the meeting room before he let himself smile. Did they really think he was *that* stupid? Sir Harry was just far too arrogant, an indulgence he and his father rarely allowed themselves. Well, Sir Harry would quickly find out the penalties of trying to cross the Luthors.
The victory was a little hollow though. He couldn’t help comparing Victoria and Clark. Actually, there was no comparison. Someone like Victoria could never hope to compare to Clark.
Lex sat down, wiggling slightly, allowing himself just a second of pleasure from the action. Dear God it was going to be hard keeping Clark at a distance. His friend was just so stubborn. It felt wrong not to confront his problems, but in this case he was just going to have to avoid Clark as much as possible.
You didn’t enter into a battle you knew you couldn’t win, and Lex knew this was one battle he had to.
If only they hadn’t run into Jeff, he might have been able to persuade his father to let him leave Smallville. But then of course, if they hadn’t run into Jeff, none of this would have happened. And try as he might, Lex couldn’t bring himself to regret it.
@>*~
Clark speeded through his chores, even for him, and avoided his parents. They looked as though they wanted to talk and he couldn’t face that right now.
He popped into the house long enough to say he was going over to Lex’s, but not long enough for them to object. As quickly as he could, he ran to the castle.
He was let in by the new housekeeper. "Good evening, Mr Kent, I’m afraid Sir isn’t in."
Clark blinked disbelievingly, "What?"
"Sir, had a meeting in Metropolis today, he is not expected to return until tomorrow evening," she informed him.
Clark wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry. He simply couldn’t believe that Lex was avoiding him. Quickly, he scanned the entire house, but she was telling the truth.
Clark sighed, he really didn’t know what to do now. "Um, do you know if it was a business meeting? I don’t want to phone him and disturb him if it is," he asked, hoping it was. Hoping Lex wasn’t avoiding him.
"I believe Sir was meeting Ms Hardwick."
Clark froze, his chest clenching painfully. "Oh okay, thank you. I’m sure I’ll see him tomorrow," he said on full automatic pilot. He walked stiffly out of the building. Lex was with Victoria. *Lex* was with *Victoria*.
Bile rose in his throat and his breath started to hitch. He couldn’t quite get his head round it. Lex was with Victoria. With a small cry, Clark ran home. When he got there, he stopped outside the house and stared at it blankly. Lex was with Victoria.
He stumbled and fell to his knees. Dropping his head back, Clark screamed as the pain hit him. His chest hurt, his heart hurt, his brain hurt, *everything* hurt. Oh God, how could he?
Clark was vaguely aware of his parents talking to him as his screams dissolved into tears, trying to comfort him. He let them lead him into the house and buried himself in his mother’s arms, his sobs racking his body.
"Clark, Clark, please, what happened?"
As he calmed a little, Clark managed a reply. "He wasn’t there."
Martha frowned questioningly at her husband. Jonathan shrugged. Both of them were desperately worried and they definitely didn’t understand how or why Clark was so upset.
"You can talk to him tomorrow," Martha said quietly, hoping to comfort him.
Clark stiffened, then pushed her away. "No," he whispered in a haunted voice, "He made his choice, and it wasn’t me." His voice broke and Clark ran up to his room, flinging himself onto his bed.
The full force of his heartbreak and Lex’s lies and betrayal hit him again and he buried his face in his pillow, crying until he fell into a fitful sleep.
@>*~
"I just don’t understand," Martha frowned with almost terrified concern, "How could he be so distressed, if Lex wasn’t even there?"
"I don’t know," Jonathan shook his head, wrapping an arm round her shoulders comfortingly. "I think I need to pay Luthor a little visit."
"Are you sure that’s a good idea?" she asked quietly.
"I want to know what he did that could hurt Clark like that, don’t you?"
She nodded reluctantly.
@>*~
"Clark, you sure you’re okay?" Chloe asked her silent friend.
"Sure," Clark answered automatically.
"Cool, let’s go then," Pete nodded enthusiastically.
"Sure," Clark repeated. He wasn’t sure how the hell he’d made it through school. His mother had tried to persuade him to stay home, but he just couldn’t. He needed something to take his mind off the pain. But school hadn’t helped. He couldn’t get the image of Lex with Victoria out of his head and it made him feel physically ill. It was even worse than the meteor rocks.
He had truly thought that above all else, Lex was his friend and he wasn’t sure if it was that betrayal that hurt the most. That Lex could just lie to him and use him like that and then run straight back to *her*.
He’d believed the words, could still hear the words ringing in his head; ‘Yes, Clark, I love you too’.
He sighed and followed his friends without really seeing them. As they walked into the Beanery, Clark knew he’d made a mistake. Lex was there, almost as if he’d been waiting for him. He did the only thing he could do and keep from either bursting into tears or losing his temper, he ignored Lex.
@>*~
Lex sat in the Beanery trying to pretend he was there for bad coffee and to finish up the paperwork for the Hardwick take over. He allowed himself a small smile as he remembered the meeting that morning, Sir Harry’s anger, Victoria’s confusion and humiliation. He definitely wasn’t there to check on Clark, using a public place so nothing could happen.
But when Clark did appear, Lex was shocked by the flash of pain in Clark’s eyes before he turned away and ignored him. Whatever Lex had expected, he hadn’t expected Clark to ignore him. He was getting some odd looks from Chloe and Pete, so he decided he should at least say hello.
He nodded at the pair who watched him warily, then turned his attention to Clark. "Clark?"
Clark tensed. He couldn’t believe the nerve. How dare Lex come over and act as if nothing had happened? "Lex," he smiled tightly.
"Everything okay?" Lex asked with a frown. He’d thought he was the one with, well not regrets exactly. But maybe now that he had had time to think about it, *he* regretted what had happened. Lex had to bite back a gasp at the pain that thought caused him.
"Sure, whatever," Clark said, coldly polite. "Have a nice *meeting*?" he asked sarcastically.
Lex frowned in confusion, "Well, yes actually. It was very satisfactory."
Clark’s chest clenched and he stood abruptly, shoving Lex back in anger. "You fucking, lying bastard," he hissed and ran out.
"Clark?" Lex ran after him, ignoring the startled looks and gasps from the other patrons of the café. "Clark!" He glanced up and down the street, but Clark was already gone. Turning, Lex nearly walked into Chloe and Pete.
"I don’t know what the hell you did to him, but you better stay away from him," Pete growled.
"If it’s any help, I have no idea what I did to upset him like that," Lex said quietly. He was completely confused. Lex went back into the café to get his things, refusing to hurry, despite feeling uncomfortable under all the curious stares.
He drove home fast, trying to work out what Clark had meant. Hurrying inside, he didn’t quite manage to avoid the housekeeper.
"Sir, Mister Rogers is waiting for you in your office. Oh and young Mister Kent came to see you last night," she told him.
Lex stopped on the stairs and turned round. "What did he say?"
"Well Sir, when I informed him of your absence, he enquired as to whether you were in a business meeting because he didn’t want to phone and disturb you if you were," she explained.
Oh. "And what did you tell him?" he asked, trying not to squeeze his eyes shut.
"That you were meeting Miss Hardwick, Sir."
Damn. "Thank you, that will be all." She nodded and he continued up the stairs slowly. Damn it! Clark must have thought he’d been *with* Victoria. Damn.
Lex paused at the top of the stairs. Maybe… maybe it was for the best. It was quite possibly the only thing that would stop Clark from trying to continue what they’d had together.
It hurt though. It hurt him badly that his only friend would believe him capable of that betrayal, but… it was for the best, no matter how much it hurt either of them.
Lex barely listened to Rogers talk. When he’d finished, Lex knew he had to stop the investigation before anyone else found out and got curious. Before anyone found out what Clark was truly capable of.
"Impossible," Lex said quietly.
"But it’s the only explanation that fits all the parameters," Rogers insisted.
"And it’s impossible," Lex repeated, "Clark’s just an ordinary kid. He can be hurt, I’ve seen it." Emotionally at least. "The investigation ends."
"But…" Rogers started.
"It ends now. Destroy the data, it’s useless." Lex raised an eyebrow when Roger’s looked as though he was about to complain. Sensibly, Rogers nodded. "Good, here’s your payment. Good day." Lex dismissed him by turning away.
At the very least, Lex could protect the one person he loved.
@>*~
Clark was on the edge of losing it completely. Ever since he’d got home, his parents hadn’t let up, trying to get him to talk, giving him worried looks. In the end he’d retreated to his room.
He lay on his bed watching the darkening sky, going over and over the confrontation at the Beanery. He wasn’t entirely sure now, what had happened. Surely Lex wasn’t so vindictive as to rub it in like that, to want to hurt him *so* badly? Then there had been that brief, flitting look of pain in Lex’s eyes, that Clark had almost missed. And the look of utter confusion when he’d shouted at him.
Surely Lex wasn’t so oblivious of how much he’d hurt him. How could he *not* know that going straight from him to Victoria would hurt him? Had he got it wrong?
Clark rolled over, clutching his pillow tightly, trying not to shred it. It was just too hard, too confusing and painful. He just didn’t know what to think anymore.
@>*~
A knock at the door startled him. "Come."
"Sir, Mister Kent is here to see you."
Lex tensed, trying to pull himself together. Why would Clark come and see him now? "Show him in."
Lex didn’t know whether to laugh or cry when Jonathan Kent walked into his office. "Mister Kent," he said warily.
"You’ve got some explaining to do, Luthor," Jonathan growled.
"Really?" Lex drawled, adopting his usual manner easily.
"What the hell did you do to my son?"
"Mister Kent, I believe that’s between me and Clark. We had a disagreement, and believe me, you would certainly take my side," Lex smirked.
"Simple disagreements don’t leave my son in pieces, Luthor," Jonathan stalked closer.
Lex shut his eyes briefly. He wasn’t sure if he could hear how he’d hurt Clark and not confess everything. Not to his father, but to Clark. "Believe me, Mister Kent, it’s for the best."
"Look, it’s no secret I dislike you, Luthor," Jonathan grimaced slightly, "But Clark considers you his best friend. And whatever this is, it’s killing him."
Lex sighed, his heart clenching painfully. "It was never my intention to hurt him, Kent, but I have. I don’t think there’s any way to get past it that won’t end up hurting him more in the long run."
Jonathan frowned in confusion. "I don’t understand."
"I know, and I can’t explain. But it’s better for Clark if he believes the worst of me," Lex sat back in his chair with a sigh.
"I need you to explain," Jonathan insisted, "I can’t help my son if you don’t. If you care about him at all…"
"It’s because I care about him that I’m doing this," Lex interrupted him. "It’s for the best and that’s all I’m going to say about it."
Jonathan clenched his jaw, trying to keep a hold on his temper. "You better hope so."
He stalked out and Lex dropped his head on his desk, relieved and exhausted. He wasn’t used to so much happening to him emotionally in such a short time. And he still had his father to deal with.
@>*~
"Well? What did he say?" Martha asked her husband anxiously.
"A lot of nonsense that didn’t make any sense," Jonathan sighed, sitting down heavily, "Whatever happened between them, he isn’t talking.
"What didn’t make sense?" she asked quietly.
"Something about it being best for Clark that he believed the worst of him. He actually said if I knew what the argument was about, I’d take his side, can you believe that?"
Martha sat back with a sigh. She’d had her suspicions, now they just seemed more concrete. "Maybe."
"Maybe what?" Jonathan asked.
"Maybe you would take his side."
"What?" Jonathan was doubly confused now.
"Jon, don’t you think Clark’s reaction was a little extreme for someone arguing with a friend?" she commented.
"Well, yes, but…"
"In fact doesn’t it strike you as a little extreme even for someone losing a friend?" she continued.
"What are you getting at?" Jonathan frowned questioningly.
"Haven’t you ever noticed the way they look at each other?" Martha asked quietly.
"What?!"
"I think Clark’s acting like someone who’s just had their heart broken," she whispered.
"Are you saying…"
"No, I’m guessing. I’m guessing they have feelings for each other and I’m guessing they talked about it and Lex said no," Martha looked at her husband, trying to gauge his reaction.
"I, but," Jonathan shook his head, "But he didn’t even see Luthor last night."
"I know, but something happened. Something to make Clark believe the worst of Lex, maybe?" She raised an eyebrow.
"I, I don’t know what to think anymore," Jonathan sighed. "What are we going to do?"
"What can we do? Is Lex right? He’s hurting Clark, but would a relationship with Lex hurt him more? He’s only fifteen, Lex is twenty one. I want our son to be happy, but which choice is the right one?" She sighed heavily.
"I don’t know, Martha, I don’t know."
@>*~
"… so well done, Lex, I’m very pleased."
"Thanks, Dad." Lex tensed, waiting expectantly.
"Now, the small matter of your behaviour this weekend," Lionel continued.
Lex snorted, "*My* behaviour? You should tell your pet to keep his hands to himself."
"Lex, I thought I’d made my position quite clear the last time," Lionel started.
"Don’t get on my case because I was dancing with an old friend," Lex sighed.
"Really? I didn’t think you had any friends, Lex, at least not old ones."
Lex froze, "What do you mean?"
"’CK’, Lex? You’ll have to do better than that."
Shit. Shit, shit, shit! "Like I said, I went dancing with a friend," he said tightly.
"You’re trying to tell me, you took a fifteen year old to that club, just to dance?" Lionel sounded more than a little disbelievingly.
"Yes," Lex replied tersely.
"That’s not how Jeff tells it."
"Clark was just being protective," Lex said quietly. His mind was racing, how much did his father know? He could never quite tell.
"You pay this boy an inordinate amount of attention for just a friend, Lex."
Damn, he knew his investigations would attract attention. "Well, as you so kindly pointed out, I don’t have many friends."
"We’ll see," Lionel said obtusely. "Expect a visitor tomorrow, see that you treat him with the proper respect."
"What?" Lex snapped. "Dad!" There was no answer but the sound of the tone.
Shit!
@>*~
When Clark woke up, his first thought was surprise that he’d slept at all. Although it didn’t feel like he’d slept. He felt drained, emotionally, physically, and damn, everything still hurt so much. He forced himself through his morning routine on automatic, not really caring about anything.
At breakfast, his parents were giving him odd looks and it made him feel even worse. Thankfully though, they didn’t try to ask him what was wrong. When his father had gone back out, his mother turned towards him and Clark waited expectantly.
"You know, the most important part of friendship is trust," she said quietly.
Clark frowned, "I know that."
"And you trust Lex, don’t you?"
"I did," Clark clenched his jaw and blinked away sudden tears. He didn’t want to have this conversation. "He betrayed it."
"Did he?" Martha asked her son gently. She wasn’t sure if she was doing the right thing, but she couldn’t bear that haunted look in his eyes any longer. "Whatever it is you think he’s done, you haven’t spoken to him about it, have you?"
Clark shook his head warily.
"Well, don’t you think you should? He’s your friend, Clark, don’t you think you owe him that much?"
"There’s nothing to talk about," Clark snapped, almost at his limit.
"There’s always something to talk about, even if it’s just for closure. If you care about him, don’t make assumptions, believe in him until you know for sure."
Clark felt the colour drain out of his face. "Mom, what are you saying?" Was she saying she knew? That she knew his feelings for Lex?
"I’m saying you should talk to him," Martha repeated quietly. "You’re going to miss the bus."
Clark stared at her in confusion, then hurried out of the house. She couldn’t know, surely? She couldn’t know and still encourage him to talk to Lex. Surely?
But it brought his train of thought back to where he’d ended up the previous night. Why would Lex be *so* cruel? Why had he looked so confused. *Had* he jumped to the wrong conclusion?
Maybe he should go and see Lex. But… but what if Lex *had* betrayed him? What then? Clark wasn’t sure if he could take it again. But what if he was wrong, if Lex did love him… he couldn’t stand not knowing for sure, now that he had all these doubts.
@>*~
"Darling!" Jeff walked into Lex’s office like he owned it.
Lex grimaced, "Go away, Jeff."
"Why, Lex, I’m so hurt. And here I was thinking you’d realised the error of your ways," Jeff drawled, sitting on the corner of Lex’s desk.
"This isn’t Metropolis, Jeff, I’m in charge here," Lex sat up straighter in his chair, refusing to give into the fearful anticipation he was feeling.
"And I’m sure you’d rather the locals didn’t know what you get up to with their sons, Lex," Jeff smirked, "Corruption of minors, Lex? I’m shocked, I really am."
"Fuck off! You’ve got nothing on me," Lex snapped.
"Oh, I beg to differ. Your father has some very interesting footage from the club security cameras." Jeff laughed and Lex struggled to control himself.
"Are you going to share that delicious piece of teenage ass, Lex? Or are you really *exclusive*?"
"You stay the fuck away from him!" Lex stood abruptly, anger overwhelming his fear. Jeff lifted his hand and trailed a finger down Lex’s cheek. Lex forced himself not to shudder.
"Well, now. If you’re *very* nice to me, I might be persuaded," Jeff whispered suggestively.
Lex clenched his jaw and swallowed convulsively. "Get out," he hissed.
"Oh now, I don’t think that’s an option, do you? Your father wouldn’t be very pleased if I didn’t earn my pay. And besides, I do so love my job," Jeff laughed.
Before Lex had a chance to say anything, Jeff smashed him in the face. Lex felt his head connect painfully with the wall and everything went black.
@>*~
"You coming, Clark?" Chloe asked, sharing a worried look with Pete. After what had happened yesterday, Clark was even more quiet than he’d been the rest of the week. And neither of them could get him to talk about it.
"No," Clark shook his head. He knew they were worried, but what was he supposed to tell them? "I have to see Lex."
"Are you sure that’s a good idea, man?" Pete asked quietly.
"I have to. I didn’t even give him a chance to talk," Clark tried to explain.
"Okay, but, you know we’re here for you, right?" Chloe said earnestly.
Clark managed a tiny smile, "Yeah, thanks guys."
Clark walked slowly to Lex’s instead of running. He still needed to think. What was he going to say? Was he doing the right thing? Yes. Yes, he was. He had to know one way or the other.
When nobody answered the door, Clark got a little worried. All of Lex’s cars were in and even if Lex wasn’t there, the housekeeper should have been. After a split second of hesitation, Clark forced the door and went inside, quietly looking round.
The eerie silence was shattered by a muffled scream and Clark ran to Lex’s room as fast as he could.
@>*~
Lex came around again, wondering if, hoping it was over now. His head hurt and his vision was still blurry from where he’d hit the wall. Breathing was difficult, he was pretty sure a couple of ribs were broken. Trying to move, he hissed with the pain from the numerous welts on his back, ass and thighs. The dried blood felt sticky and uncomfortable. But worst of all was the searing agony from his shredded ass. He couldn’t hold back a moan of pain and froze when weight shifted on the bed.
"Lexie, awake at last," Jeff purred. He prodded the gashes on Lex’s ass none too gently and Lex choked back a sob. "Ready for another round? I must say, I missed your sweet ass."
Lex tried to brace himself as he felt Jeff move round behind him. When Jeff’s cock shoved into his body, tearing him again, Lex bit down on his pillow and screamed. Jeff pulled back without pausing and rammed into him again. Then the door exploded and Lex lost consciousness as Clark flew into the room.
@>*~
Nothing could have prepared Clark for what he saw. Lex tied down to his bed, black and blue, blood everywhere and that bastard pushing into him roughly even as blood trickled from Lex’s ass.
With anger and hatred he could barely control, Clark grabbed the surprised Jeff round his neck and pulled him back. Then he threw him across the room, so hard he heard the plaster crack when Jeff hit the wall. Jeff was unconscious and Clark managed to stop himself from going to finish the job.
Lex. He had to help Lex. Barely managing to hold back his tears, Clark crawled onto the bed and gently untied his unconscious friend. Sniffing and wiping at his eyes, Clark hurried into the bathroom to get water and look for something he could use. In the end he gave up, he didn’t have time to look. His heart was pounding painfully and his eyes kept blurring up with tears.
Clark hurried back to the bed and wiped away as much blood as he could. As gently as possible, he wrapped Lex up in a sheet and picked him up. He took him to the only place he could. Home.
@>*~
Martha and Jonathan were startled when Clark burst in. They took one look and hurried over to help. Jonathan took Lex from Clark, who looked on the point of collapse, and Martha helped her son follow them upstairs. Clark sat down on the floor of his room dazedly, silently watching his father gently lay Lex on his bed.
"On his front," Clark whispered.
"What?" Jonathan glanced at his son worriedly.
"Put him on his front," Clark said agitatedly.
Jonathan didn’t understand why. Until he carefully unwrapped the sheet. "Jesus Christ! Clark, what happened?" he exclaimed.
Clark didn’t answer. He crawled up to the bed and knelt beside it, laying his head on the pillow to stare at Lex’s battered face. He reached out and gently stroked the smooth, unblemished skin of Lex’s forehead.
"Please wake up," he whispered tearfully.
Martha swallowed back her own tears, her heart breaking at her son’s pain and the terrible sight of Lex’s broken body. She knelt down beside Clark and carefully stroked his hair. "What happened, honey?"
"My fault," Clark sobbed. It was all his fault. If he hadn’t persuaded Lex to go out, if he had trusted his friend, if he’d only been there.
"Clark," Jonathan said quietly, staring in horror at Lex’s injuries, "How can it be your fault?"
"Punishment," Clark whispered, "For being with me. His father…"
Martha gasped, "His father did this?"
Clark shook his head, "Jeff, his father’s thug. Oh God, it’s all my fault." Mechanically, Clark went to the bathroom and got some cloths and antiseptic and went back to his room to gently clean Lex’s wounds, before pulling a clean sheet over him.
"Clark, he needs to go to the hospital," Martha said quietly, glancing pleadingly at her husband. Jonathan just looked stunned. Neither of them could quite believe someone could do this to their own child, even Lionel Luthor.
"No!" Clark lifted his head, "He wouldn’t want that." He tried to pull himself together enough to think.
"Lex," he whispered, leaning over to gently kiss Lex’s forehead, not caring that his parents were present. "Lex, please, you gotta wake up."
"Clark?" Lex croaked. Was he dreaming? He still hurt all over, but Clark’s voice was soothing.
"Oh, Lex, oh god, I’m so sorry," Clark whispered.
"Not…" Lex swallowed and tried to moisten his lips, "Not your fault."
Clark blinked against a fresh wave of tears, trying to concentrate. "Lex, you need a doctor. How do I contact Toby?"
Lex tried to clear his head. "555-4237," he whispered.
Clark lifted his head again. "Mom, please phone. Tell Toby it’s for Lex and it’s urgent."
"Who’s Toby?"
"Just, please, do it."
"Clark," Lex whispered. He could hear the distress in Clark’s voice and he couldn’t bear it. "I’m okay."
"Shh, Lex, just rest," Clark said quietly, stroking his forehead again. "Dad, could you please get some water?"
Jonathan stared at his son and how gently and tenderly he was touching Lex. Martha was right. Only he wasn’t so sure Lex *had* said no. At least not initially. He sighed and nodded, heading for the kitchen. He passed Martha on the stairs and gave her a quick hug. She gave him a tiny smile and hurried back to Clark’s room.
Martha stared helplessly. Clark had climbed onto the bed next to Lex and was crying silently as he gently stroked Lex’s face. Tears came to her eyes again as she watched a broken, barely conscious Lex try to soothe her son. Jonathan returned with a glass of water and silently handed it to Clark. He wrapped Martha in his arms and they stood watch over the couple while they waited for the mysterious Toby to arrive.
@>*~
Jonathan opened the door. "He’s upstairs." He stared curiously at the long haired, casually dressed man, carrying a black, leather bag. Toby nodded silently and followed him.
When he saw Toby, Clark got off the bed and let his mother pull him into a hug. Toby pulled back the sheet and sighed.
"Jesus, Lex, not again," he muttered.
"Yeah, I know," Lex said weakly.
"Again?" Jonathan exclaimed.
Toby ignored him. "Why are you here?" he asked Lex.
"Jeff’s at the castle," Lex whispered.
"That son of a bitch?!" Toby shook his head, "I’m surprised he’s still alive."
Lex laughed bitterly, then winced. Clark went round to the other side of the bed, needing to be closer to Lex. He took his hand and Lex managed to squeeze it, trying to reassure him.
"How badly did he tear you?" Toby asked, kneeling down to open his bag.
"Feels pretty bad," Lex whispered.
"Tear him?" Martha asked in total confusion.
Lex shifted his head to glance at the Kent’s as best he could. "Blood makes the best lube," he said brutally.
"Oh God!" Martha gasped and took a step back into Jonathan’s arms. "Oh Lex, I…" She couldn’t continue.
Toby went into the bathroom to wash up, then pulled on some latex gloves. Clark sat on the bed and watched him work. It seemed to take forever and every wince, gasp and cry from Lex hurt him. Eventually Lex was sewn and taped up and Toby asked the Kent’s to leave while he examined Lex’s torn anus and rectum.
Clark refused to leave.
"Okay, Lex, ready?" Toby asked gently.
"Do it," Lex managed to whisper. He clung tightly onto Clark’s hand as Toby probed his ass as gently as possible.
Toby sighed, "Okay, thankfully, you don’t need stitches this time."
"Yeah, well, he’d only got to round two," Lex grimaced with pain.
Clark closed his eyes against tears. Why the hell had he walked? If he’d run to see Lex instead, maybe he could have prevented this.
"Clark," Lex said quietly, "I can feel you guilt tripping. Stop it."
"But I…"
"Stop it, please," Lex sighed. Clark was certainly not to blame. He may have been a little thoughtless in taking Clark to the club, but it wasn’t his fault either, it was his sick fuck of a father and his bastard thug. A sharp burst of pain shot through him and he gasped. "Jesus, Toby!"
"Sorry," Toby grimaced. He was trying to apply an antiseptic and antibiotic cream to the anal tears. Finally he was finished and he pulled the sheet back over Lex. "Get some rest, Lex."
"I’ll get you your usual payment as soon as I can," Lex whispered, closing his eyes. He was exhausted.
"This one’s on me, man," Toby said quietly. "Clark, was it?" he looked at Clark and Clark nodded. "Come downstairs, I need to talk to you and your parents about further care, okay?"
"Okay," Clark answered. "I’ll be right back, Lex," he whispered, dropping a gentle kiss on the top of Lex’s head.
"I’ll be here," Lex laughed a little bitterly. It wasn’t as if he could get anywhere.
Clark sighed and followed Toby downstairs to where his parents were waiting. Toby sat down and stared at them seriously.
"He’s going to need a lot of care, especially over the next few days. Are you okay with that?" he started. Clark looked at his parents pleadingly and smiled in relief when they nodded. "Okay, good.
"He needs the wounds cleaned and dressed everyday and antibiotic cream put on them. I’ll leave a broad spectrum antibiotic, three a day, make sure he finishes the course. He’ll need antibiotic cream applied to the uh, anal tearing twice a day. For tonight, wake him every couple of hours, check to be sure he’s responsive. He’s got a mild concussion, but he should be fine.
"Plenty of water and soup, go easy on the solids for a while. And make sure he stays in bed for at least a week. He’s stubborn but he needs to rest."
Clark nodded, "That’s fine."
"Good," Toby stared at him for a moment, then nodded, "Good. You have my number if you need me."
Clark nodded again, "Thank you."
"No problem, you did good kid." Toby got up and left them to it.
Clark turned his attention back to his parents. "I… Mom, Dad, thank you," he whispered.
Martha got up and went to hug her son, holding him tightly when he started to cry quietly. "It’s okay, sweetheart, we can talk about it tomorrow. Are you going to watch Lex tonight?" she asked.
Clark looked up and wiped his eyes. "Can I?" He glanced at his father nervously.
Jonathan stood up and squeezed his shoulder gently, "Yes, son."
Clark hugged his mother, then stood and hugged his father tightly. "Thank you. I love you guys," he whispered. Then he hurried upstairs.
Jonathan sat down beside his wife, "Dear God, Martha, that poor boy."
"I know, Jon. But he’s not alone anymore," she said quietly, "He’s got Clark, and he’s got us, right?"
Jonathan smiled and kissed her gently, "Damn right."
@>*~
Clark lay beside Lex and watched him all night. Every couple of hours, he woke Lex up and made sure he was okay. The rest of the time, he tried desperately not to torture himself with what if’s.
But it was hard, really hard. No matter how many times he went through it, everything, all of it was *his* fault. He should never have asked Lex to take him to Metropolis in the first place, let alone a club, any club.
Why couldn’t he have just asked Lex to come over and watch a video, or stargaze in the loft? No, he just had to try and push things, act different than he was. What chance did they have now? Clark suspected that Lex didn’t blame him now, but when he’d had the chance to think it over… how could he expect Lex to forgive him?
Clark hadn’t realised morning had come, until his parents knocked quietly and came in. They stared at him for a little while, and he really didn’t know what to say to them.
"Come on, son," Jonathan said eventually, "We need to talk."
Clark sighed and nodded. He followed them out of the room with a last, longing glance at Lex. He sat down opposite his parents, clasping his hands together tightly. He wondered how much they already knew.
"Clark?" Martha gave him a tiny, reassuring smile.
Clark sighed, "Lex and I went to Metropolis at the weekend. We went to a club. I’m sorry, I just, I just wanted to spend some time with him away from here. I… I…"
"Clark, we know you have feelings for him," Martha said quietly.
Clark nodded slowly, "We have feelings for each other." He paused at his father’s sigh and glanced at him.
Jonathan met his gaze, "It’s okay, Clark."
Clark took a deep breath. "It didn’t come out until after we ran into Jeff. Lex was scared of him. I’ve never seen Lex scared. He told me… he told me his father had used Jeff to punish him, r-rape him, to keep him away from men."
Martha sighed and shut her eyes briefly. She was overwhelmed with sorrow and horror for Lex.
"He admitted he had feelings for me after, after I told him that I love him," Clark continued.
Martha and Jonathan exchanged a glance, knowing Clark wouldn’t say the words if he didn’t mean them.
"But, he said we couldn’t be together, that we had to forget about it." Clark shook his head, "I told him I wasn’t going to give up, until… well, I thought he’d been with Victoria, now I’m not sure.
"I knew I had to talk to him, that’s why I went over yesterday, how I, how I found him," Clark’s voice broke and he had to swallow against the lump in his throat. He blinked rapidly. "Jeff must have told his father."
Martha moved over to hug him tightly, "Oh Clark, I’m so sorry. But you mustn’t blame yourself."
"There’s no one else to blame," Clark whispered tearfully.
Jonathan leaned forward, "Clark, what did you do to Jeff?"
Clark blinked, "I uh, threw him into a wall. He was unconscious when I left." His face hardened, "I wanted to kill him, I should have killed him."
"Clark, no!" Martha gasped.
"I’ve never wanted to hurt someone so much in my life, not even Phelan," Clark continued oblivious.
"Clark, you can’t kill him. Clark!" Jonathan said firmly. Clark met his father’s eyes, "Promise me, you won’t kill him."
Clark stared stubbornly for a moment, then with a sigh, he nodded, "I promise." Jonathan sighed in relief and sat back.
"Clark, why don’t you take Lex his first pill and use the cream on his, uh, on him," Martha suggested, "I’ll look after him while you’re at school, okay?"
Clark shook his head in shock," School?" Going to school just seemed wrong.
"It’s probably best if things seem normal," Jonathan agreed.
Clark sighed, "Fine." He grabbed the antibiotics Toby had left and hurried upstairs.
Clark knelt by the bed and stared at Lex’s bruised face for a moment, then he reached out and gently stroked his head. "Lex?" he whispered, "Lex, time to wake up."
Lex resisted the soothing voice. He hurt, he wanted to sleep until it all just went away. But the voice didn’t stop and the gentle touch to his scalp was too compelling.
"Clark?"
"It’s morning, Lex," Clark said quietly.
Lex groaned and peeled his eyes open, taking in Clark’s concerned face. "I need the bathroom," he grimaced.
"Okay." Clark very carefully helped Lex up and almost carried his dizzy friend to the bathroom. Lex groaned again, pain slamming through his head and ass. Clark helped him relieve himself and he couldn’t even find the energy to feel humiliated.
Clark got him back onto the bed as quickly as he could, careful not to jar Lex at all. "You need to take this." Clark took a pill out of the bottle and helped Lex lift his head so he could drink some water with the pill.
"Uh, dizzy," Lex grimaced, happy when he was lying flat again.
Clark bit back a sob. He couldn’t stand seeing Lex this way, he felt so helpless. "Lex, I have, I have to put some cream on the tears," Clark said quietly, biting his lip.
Lex closed his eyes, "It’s okay, Clark, I’d rather you did it."
Clark nodded. At least his x-ray sight would come in handy, he could see exactly where the cream needed to go. Lex was surprised at how quick and gentle Clark was. It didn’t hurt nearly as much as he’d expected. Still, he was panting and sweating by the time Clark was done.
"I’m sorry," Clark whispered, close to tears again.
"Clark, please don’t. It’s not your fault, okay?" Lex breathed out heavily.
Clark shook his head, "No, you’re hurt because of me."
"Not because of you," Lex insisted quietly, "Don’t argue with me Clark, it hurts my head." He felt a little bad trying to guilt trip Clark, but he had to try and get it through his friend’s thick skull.
Clark stared at him. "Sorry," he whispered again. "I, I have to go to school, but my mother is going to look after you." He got up and went to the door.
"Clark," Lex whispered. He really needed to hear that Clark loved him, that someone loved him, but he couldn’t quite ask, "Tell me…"
Clark smiled sadly," I love you, Lex."
"Clark… it was just a business meeting." Lex met Clark’s startled gaze, "I do love you."
Clark’s breath hitched. Despite everything, just hearing that made him feel better, like he could cope with a day at school, away from Lex. He crossed the room again and dropped a soft kiss on Lex’s forehead.
"I’ll see you later," he whispered as he left.
Lex stared at the door until a dizzy spell forced him to shut his eyes. He wished that Clark loving him, and him loving Clark was enough. But even without his father, all his original arguments still stood. Clark was fifteen, underage and untouchable. There was no happy ending for him. Life wasn’t fair and Lex had always known that.
@>*~
Lionel Luthor stepped out of the helicopter and strolled unhurriedly to the castle. He wandered up the stairs to Lex’s room. He wanted to see his son. By now, Lex should be nicely malleable. Lionel was very curious about the Kent boy and he wanted to know what Lex knew.
He was surprised to find Jeff unconscious on the floor. Lionel frowned as he stepped closer, examining the crack in the wall. What could possibly throw a 6’6", 300lb man against a wall with such force.
Well, well. Rogers might not be the raving lunatic he seemed. Lionel smiled in satisfaction and headed out again, leaving Jeff without a backwards glance.
@>*~
"Why are you doing this?"
Martha stopped dressing Lex’s wounds for a moment and stared at him. "I’d be doing this for anyone in the same situation," she said quietly, "But I’m doing it for you because Clark cares about you, and I know you care about Clark."
Lex frowned, "You don’t mind?"
"What I mind, Lex, is you breaking my son’s heart by trying to decide what’s best for him," she said tartly, "Clark’s fifteen, but he not…"
"Not human, I know," Lex interrupted.
Martha raised an eyebrow, "I was going to say, not a kid." She sighed, "He told you then."
Lex nodded, "I had suspicions already. Missus Kent, I think we may have a problem."
Martha froze at Lex’s tone, "What do you mean?"
"I was… I was having Clark investigated," he started.
"What?!" she gasped.
"After this weekend, I stopped the investigation but," Lex sighed, "I think my interest in Clark attracted my father’s attention. He hinted that he knows something."
"Oh God," Martha breathed.
"I, I’m sorry," Lex whispered, "I never meant to hurt Clark."
"I know, Lex," she sighed, "But what the hell are we going to do?"
"I don’t know."
@>*~
Clark felt weird, but not in a bad way exactly. The field trip had actually been kind of fun, until he’d had to pull Eric up from the dam and the lightning had hit him.
But right now, all he wanted was to be home with Lex, not at the Beanery with Chloe and Pete, pretending things were normal. Or what passed for normal in Smallville.
After listening to Chloe’s latest wild theories for a while, he couldn’t stand it any longer. "Listen guys, I’m beat. I’m gonna go home." He stood up and they nodded and smiled. Thankfully, they hadn’t pushed him that day, accepting his need for space. He smiled back.
He’d only been walking for a minute, lost in thought, when someone stepped in his path. Clark looked up and sucked in a shocked breath.
"Surprised to see me?" Lionel Luthor smirked at him.
"What do you want?" Clark snapped, taking a step back.
"To see you," Lionel’s smile grew wider but no less unpleasant. "To see why my son would risk annoying me just to prove some outlandish theory."
Clark glared at him, " What do you mean?"
"Lex will go to extraordinary lengths to find out what he wants to know. Obviously, his investigations are limited without proof. What better way to get it than to manipulate the subject into talking." Lionel laughed at Clark’s expression.
"You don’t know what you’re talking about," Clark hissed, trying to keep calm.
"Oh, please. You don’t think he cares about you, do you?"
Clark turned away but Lionel caught his wrist, "Did he tell you he was investigating you?"
Clark tried to hide a wince, but not before Lionel caught it. The older man’s grip was… was hurting him. Lionel frowned.
"You’re lying," Clark snapped, trying to pull away.
"Am I?"
"Let go of me!" Clark wrenched his arm away, stumbling slightly. He walked away hurriedly, his throat was tight, his chest was tight. He felt like he couldn’t breathe. And his wrist *hurt*.
As soon as he was out of sight, Clark started to run. Then he stopped and tried again. His speed wasn’t working. Damn it! What the hell was happening to him? He didn’t need this, he needed to see Lex, confront him. He tried not to jump to conclusions again, but damn it, he couldn’t help it.
Clark ran home at human speed and hurried indoors.
"Clark," his mother started.
"Not now." Clark ran upstairs to his room.
"Clark?" Lex opened his eyes and was surprised to see Clark pacing agitatedly.
"I saw your father," Clark snapped.
Lex sighed, "Ah."
"So, you found out what you wanted to know, congratulations. What now? Your father takes over?" Clark said angrily. He’d worked himself up so much he wasn’t thinking about what he was saying.
Lex clenched his jaw. He was starting to remember why he didn’t have friends; they were the people who could hurt you the most.
"Sure, whatever, Clark. You’ve obviously got it all worked out."
Clark stopped pacing and dropped his head onto his chest. Somebody else might have missed it, but the pain in Lex’s voice penetrated Clark’s chest and lodged in his heart. He dropped down beside the bed and put his head on the pillow.
"I’m sorry, Lex. I… I didn’t mean it. He was just so…" Clark squeezed his eyes shut.
Lex sighed, giving in immediately, from the despondency and self loathing he could hear in Clark’s tone. "I know," he whispered. He lifted his arm carefully and stroked Clark’s thick hair. "Clark, why are you so quick to believe I could hurt you? You believed in me when we were just friends."
Clark sighed, his breath hitching. "I just, I don’t want to lose you, Lex. And I keep getting scared, and I can’t think straight. You drive me crazy, you keep pushing me away," Clark stopped, shaking his head. It was too hard to explain.
"Clark, I *was* investigating you, but only because I knew you were different and I was curious. I also hate being lied to, but I can’t blame you for that. Unfortunately, my interest in you was a little too obvious," Lex said quietly.
Clark sighed again, "Why is this all so hard, Lex?"
Lex laughed a little bitterly, "*Life* is hard, Clark." His voice dropped, "Especially for people like us."
Clark stared at him and frowned. "My mother says anything worth having, is worth fighting for." He reached up to touch Lex’s hand. "I think you’re worth fighting for," he whispered thickly.
Lex’s eyes blurred again, but with tears this time, "Clark, please don’t do this to me. Nothing’s changed, you know that."
"I know," Clark nodded, staring at him stubbornly, "I’m still not giving you up, and it’s still not over."
"Clark…"
"No," Clark whispered. He cupped Lex’s face and moved closer, gently pressing his lips to Lex’s mouth. Lex sighed quietly, his eyes sliding closed as he gave himself up to Clark’s soft exploration of his mouth.
Even though his lips hurt a little, it felt so good. Funny how he’d missed this touch in such a short time. But he wasn’t in any condition for the physical reactions Clark was arousing in him, so he gripped Clark’s wrist and pulled away. Lex was about to speak when he noticed Clark flinch.
Clark sighed when Lex broke the kiss far too soon, but his friend caught his wrist and it hurt.
"Clark?"
Clark frowned and pulled his shirt sleeve down. Lex stared at the purplish marks on Clark’s skin in shock. "Clark, is that… how?"
Clark stared at the bruises and shook his head, "I don’t, I… your father grabbed me, but I, I didn’t realise. Lex… it *hurts*."
Lex would probably have laughed at Clark’s expression, if it had been anyone *but* Clark. But this was serious.
"Clark," Lex managed to push himself onto his side and up slightly, "Clark, get your parents."
Clark blinked, still stunned, and nodded. He got up and walked to the door. "Mom, Dad, can you come up please?" he called.
He sat down on the floor next to the bed and leaned his head back onto the mattress. Lex gently stroked his hair, rolling back onto his front, with a slight wince from the jolt to his ribs, so he could get a little closer.
@>*~
There was utter silence. Clark glanced at his parents first, then twisted his head to look at Lex. they all looked concerned. He sighed and turned into Lex, so he could nuzzle his cheek, needing the contact.
Lex looked at the Kent’s uncertainly. It was one thing to know your son had feelings for another man, quite another to see him being physically affectionate. Jonathan looked uncomfortable and Martha was giving them a reluctant looking smile.
He was relieved, he wanted to be able to provide some sort of comfort to Clark.
"Maybe it’s just temporary," Jonathan started, "If Eric was holding meteor rocks like you say, maybe they did something when the lightning hit."
Clark shrugged, he was still a little shell shocked, "Maybe."
"What if it isn’t?" Martha asked.
"They can’t have just gone," Jonathan frowned, trying to think. "They’re part of him."
"Excuse me," Lex interjected, "Permanent or temporary, Clark without his abilities is useless to my father."
"Gee, thanks, Lex," Clark laughed.
"You know what I mean," Lex raised an eyebrow, "He’ll know why I was having you investigated and he’ll want to know if I was right. Now there’s no proof."
"Except if they come back," Jonathan pointed out.
Lex grimaced, "True."
"Well so far being normal sucks," Clark commented.
"Tell me about it," Lex muttered.
"Lex, oh I’m sorry, here I am moaning about a bruise." Clark turned round to face the bed and cupped Lex’s face, "How are you feeling?"
Lex tried to smother a smile, "Fine, considering."
"Did you eat anything? Mom, did you change his dressings? Did you remember to give him his pill?"
"Clark, you’re babbling," Lex chuckled, "Your Mom’s a great nurse."
"Thank you, Lex," Martha smiled, shaking her head at her son.
Clark flushed, "Sorry, I just…"
"I know," Lex whispered.
Jonathan and Martha glanced at each other, suddenly feeling like they were intruding.
"I’ll make some more soup. Clark, why don’t you give Lex his pill and use the cream," Martha suggested.
Clark nodded, "Okay."
Left by themselves, Clark felt a little awkward. Quickly, he helped Lex take his antibiotic, then he pulled back the sheet. He sighed, at least the bruises weren’t quite so vivid anymore.
"This is probably going to hurt more than this morning. I can’t use my x-ray sight to help me," he said quietly.
Lex blinked, "You have x-ray sight?"
"Had, yes."
"Wow, ow!"
"Sorry," Clark winced.
Lex took as deep a breath as he could and tried to relax. "It’s okay, just go slow."
"’Kay." Clark tried to be as gentle as possible.
"Oh." Lex’s eyes widened and he shifted.
Clark stopped. "What? Did I hurt you?" he asked anxiously.
"No, it’s just… that felt nice and that’s just weird."
"It’s better than pain though, isn’t it?" Clark asked quietly.
"Yeah," Lex whispered. He tried to concentrate on relaxing. "So, you’ve got strength, speed, x-ray vision and bullets just bruise you, anything else?"
Clark sighed, "Sometimes I wake up floating." It felt a little weird talking about his abilities when he didn’t seem to have them, and when he had a finger inside Lex. and despite everything, he was feeling a little turned on. And *that* was weird and selfish. He bit his lip, unconsciously rubbing Lex’s prostate again.
Lex sighed, his shock at Clark’s statement distracted by the cross between pain and pleasure from Clark’s gentle caress.
"Clark, what are you doing?" he whispered.
Clark froze, then gently withdrew his finger, covering Lex up again, "Sorry."
Lex twisted his head to look back at his friend, observing the look of guilty shame. "Clark, you… want me?" Lex was more than a little surprised, especially when Clark nodded and refused to meet his eyes. "But I look like shit."
"But you’re still you," Clark whispered. "I’m sorry… selfish." Clark was mortified. Only a day away from being brutally raped and beaten and here he was forcing his attentions on Lex. he hurried to the door.
"Clark." Clark stopped but didn’t look round. "Clark, it’s okay. Just you kissing me turns me on. I’m just not up to it right now. You touching me is nothing like… like what happened, okay?" Lex tried to reassure Clark.
"It was still wrong," Clark whispered.
"I wish I could say you touching me is never wrong, but it is, just not for that reason," Lex said quietly.
Clark finally looked at Lex, still feeling uncertain, guilty.
Lex sighed, now he felt like he’d kicked a puppy. "Come here… Clark, come here, please." Clark approached the bed nervously. "How do you do this, Clark?" Lex whispered, "I try to be strong and then you look at me and all I want to do is kiss you. But nothing changes the facts, Clark. I want you, but I can’t have you."
Clark knelt back down beside the bed. "And I get no choice? No say?" he asked quietly.
"In the eyes of the law, no," Lex whispered.
"Then the law’s wrong," Clark said stubbornly.
"The law is there for your protection, Clark," Lex sighed.
"Lex, we could argue about this forever. The fact is, we love each other, and we’ve already broken the law so the point is moot," Clark pointed out.
"Turning counsel on me?" Lex smiled softly.
"Can I kiss you?" Clark ignored his question.
Lex sighed and gave in, "Please."
Clark leaned in and gently licked his lips. Lex sighed again, parting them under the soft probing. Clark pressed his mouth against Lex’s and the kiss deepened slowly as they tasted and explored each others’ mouths. Only the door opening made Clark pull away reluctantly.
Martha blinked, slightly surprised that the sight of her son kissing Lex so tenderly just made her feel touched and a little sad. Sad that Clark was so in love and in such a difficult situation.
"I, uh, I brought some soup. Lex, would you prefer it if Clark helped you?" she asked quietly.
"Thank you, Missus Kent," Lex smiled up at her.
"I think you can call me Martha, Lex," she said, putting the soup down on the bedside table.
"Thank you, Martha."
"Thanks, Mom," Clark said, flushing slightly, glad she hadn’t said anything about catching them kissing.
"Dinner will be ready in half an hour, Clark, okay?" Martha bent down and kissed her son on the cheek.
"Okay, Mom."
"Your parents are being very understanding," Lex commented when they were alone again.
"I know," Clark smiled, "But then I’ve never been normal. The circumstances *are* a little unusual."
"I guess." Lex had to wonder if they’d be so supportive if they knew everything. He couldn’t quite see any parent being pleased that their fifteen year old child was in a sexual relationship. Had been in a sexual relationship, he corrected himself.
"Don’t," Clark said quietly, as he helped Lex into a sort of sitting position.
"Don’t what?"
"You know what. I can see it on your face." Clark sat on the bed and picked up the bowl of soup, holding it so Lex could eat. Lex didn’t say anything.
"Do you want anything else before I go downstairs?" Clark asked quietly.
"I could use the bathroom again," Lex replied equally quietly.
It wasn’t quite as effortless helping Lex without his strength, but Lex was a little more steady this time. He carefully helped Lex back into bed and pulled the sheet over him.
"Sleep, I’ll be up later." Clark bent down and kissed him softly.
"Okay," Lex sighed quietly. He was worried. Worried about Clark’s loss of powers, about his stubbornness and about his parents. But he was more worried about what his father might do. If only he wasn’t so helpless.
@>*~
END