TITLE: Signs of Life

FANDOM: Mel Gibson

MOVIE BASE: Signs (AU - Alternate Universe)

RATING: NC-17 overall for sex and language in some chapters

WARNING: One chapter - minor F/F slash, One chapter - non consensual sexual act

DISCLAIMER: The usual - don't own them, not trying to make any profit, etc, etc.

CHARACTERS: From the movie - Reverend Graham Hess, his brother part-time ball-player Merrill Hess, his children Morgan and Bo Hess, deceased wife Colleen, and troublemaker Lionel.

Original characters - Star Kennedy, Tony, Mariah, and other assorted minor ones.

AUTHOR: Max

FEEDBACK: Constructive criticism is much appreciated on or off-list goss6@sover.net

TWO AUTHOR'S NOTES: 1. One thing I changed in my little fantasy story based on the movie Signs is that Mel's minister character has remained active in the church after his wife's tragic death. He is, of course, having an internal crisis of faith caused by the accident, like in the movie, but I didn't want him actually retired from the church and not praying any longer. Instead of quitting the church and giving up on prayer, he is more like "going through the motions."

2. The religious preferences, biases and political opinions of the characters do not necessarily reflect my own. A major part of this story is two people who practice two very different religions coming together in love eventually. I absolutely mean no disrespect to either religion no matter what the characters may say or do to piss each other off. Religion is such a touchy subject for some people; I just felt I had to say this.

Signs Of Life
by Max

RING! RING! RING! The telephone rings insistently in the old Pennsylvania country house, as Graham is saying bedtime prayers with his two young children. - Who would call here after eight? - he wonders worriedly. - Must be Merrill from work. Something must be wrong. - And he races to the phone; desperate to catch it before his younger brother hangs up. "Merrill?" he answers it with a touch of panic in his voice.

"Huh?" a brassy female voice says back to him. "I'm LOOKING for Merrill. Tell'm it's Star."

"Merrill is at work," Graham replies, slightly upset now that this stranger has interrupted his children's bedtime routine.

"No prob, Tell'm I'll be there on the ten-o-clock bus."

"What?" Graham ALMOST shouts, something he rarely ever does. Graham Hess, a minister by calling, has always been a fairly low-key individual. But, recently, with good reason, he has been teetering on the edge of an emotional collapse.

"Gotta run, dude," she says and hangs up on him.

Graham looks at the phone, listening to the dial tone, as he tries to remember what Merrill has told him about the woman with the strange name that he met in Philadelphia while he played baseball. - Not much. Said she was a little older than him. Twenty-nine maybe? And hot? I think that's the term he used. Dated her occasionally. Never said he invited her here, though. -

Time to call Merrill at work. "Your friend Star called. Said she was coming in on the ten-o-clock bus. Did you forget to tell me something, Merrill?"

"Shit! I mean shoot. Sorry. Yeah, I told her the last time we talked that she should come visit when she had time. Didn't know when that would be, though. Not a problem is it if she stays with us?" he asks hopefully. - Really like to see Star again. Maybe even pick up where we left off! -

Graham hesitates, not liking the idea of a stranger, to him, staying in the house with his kids. But he knows that half the house is legally Merrill's, and as much as he feels over-protective of his younger brother, the man is well old enough at 25 to not foolishly invite someone dangerous into their family home. Plus, he can't just ignore that tone of need in his brother's voice and remembers better now how Merrill would gaze off happily as he talked about this city woman.

- Can't do any harm if she stays for a visit? She may be from the city, but if Merrill likes her, then I'm sure she'll fit in and not disrupt anything. Wonder what religion she follows, if she'll want to go to church with us. Don't remember Merrill ever mentioning it before. - "That's fine, Merrill. Bring her over, and I'll get the spare room ready."

"Ummmm I can't," Merrill admits sheepishly. "Can't leave work, here all night. PLEASE can you get her for me? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, Graham."

A weary sigh, knowing it will mean waking up his kids for a trip to the bus station, as he'll never get a sitter at that hour for them. "OK I'll get her," he agrees and hangs up.

Almost two hours later, nearing to ten, he and his son and daughter are waiting for the bus. It arrives on time, but no one matching the woman's description gets off. Shaking his head in confusion, he heads to the ticket desk to ask if a Star Kennedy is on the passenger list. The transit employee won't give him any information, though, as the list is private, although she rushes to apologize to him after explaining the rule. "I'm very sorry, Father. I wish I could help."

Graham hates being called Father now, but he keeps it to himself and briefly wonders again for the billionth time if he should have quit the church months ago. Nodding his head at the lady, he takes his seat again and tries to keep the children occupied until the next bus arrives two hours later. Star is not on that one either, however, and Graham, more upset now than he cares to admit, throws in the towel and goes home.

Before retiring to bed, himself, he leaves a note for Merrill about what happened on the kitchen table, knowing that Merrill always goes right into the kitchen for a snack in the morning after work. - Merrill can straighten it out with her on the phone tomorrow. I did my best. -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Four hours later than expected, Star steps off the bus and is, for a moment, quite pissed at Merrill for not being there for her. - Oh well, guess I shoulda called him back when I realized I couldn't get outta my shift at the club tonight. Course, that woulda meant talking to that strange sounding brother of his instead. Merrill said he's a priest, preacher, rabbi, monk or something? Don't remember. But he sure didn't sound too happy when I said I was coming. Well, that's HIS problem. Time to catch a cab to their place. -

Looking for her luggage now, she is soon told by the only person left on duty that it somehow got left behind and will come in on the first bus the next day. Star wants to complain, of course, but knows that it won't get her luggage back any faster, so instead she stalks into the terminal bathroom to take care of business. - Gotta pee first. Could be miles to the Hess farm. -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"For fuck's sake!" she screams into the dead night around her at the now darkened bus terminal parking lot. - Merrill didn't tell me they were THAT far off planet earth! There isn't a fucking car ANYWHERE! Damn it! Should I call their house at 2:30 in the morning or start walking into town until I find someone to ask for directions? Screw it! I'm calling! Wake up the whole fucking house for all I care! - And she goes to re-enter the building to use a phone when ..... "SON OF A BITCH!" - It's locked already?! I KNEW I shoulda re-charged my cell before I left civilization! Looks like I'm walking. How far can they be? - And off she heads towards the streetlights of town seen in the not too far distance.

Unfortunately, the only person out and about at that time of night in the small town is the town drunk, and after receiving barely understandable directions, she keeps on walking. Five miles later, Star has had enough and is feeling quite glad now that she didn't have any luggage to carry after all. Her clothes are filthy, having tripped in the semi-darkness twice and landed in mud puddles, and she's about ready to cry in frustration.

Sitting down in the middle of the dirt road, Star looks up at the stars and not quite full moon, wondering what she should do. - WOW! - her eyes widen in appreciation. A spectacular shooting star has flown across the sky. - Must be a sign, - she thinks half seriously and pulls herself together to continue walking.

Not three minutes later, she has rounded the next bend and mouths a quick 'thank you' to the sky. There is the house Merrill described to her once. Everything is dark, except for a porch light that Graham always leaves on for Merrill, and Star knocks hard on the door, but receives no answer. - Must be sleeping. Shit, my feet hurt in these shoes. What're the chances the door is unlocked? .. Oh yeah, country folks. Gotta remember people feel safe here. Don't lock doors like normal people do. -

Exhausted, she heads right up the staircase and finds the bathroom, stripping all her dirty clothes off and quickly cleaning herself with a washcloth. Then, naked, she quietly opens the door of the first bedroom she comes to. She can see the silhouette in the dark room of a man she assumes is Merrill, lying on his back in a large bed, and she easily climbs right in to snuggle against him. - Mmmm .... didn't realize I missed him so much until now. And we've only done it once. Have to rectify that in the morning. Strange, he must've changed deodorant or cologne? Smells even nicer than I remember. -

Graham's arm lifts in his sleep to hold the warm body against him, sighing to himself contently as he begins to dream of his dead wife Colleen, a woman gone for only a few short months now.

In the morning, however, it is Star who is lying on her back with Graham's face buried between her breasts. His mouth, as though sensing in his half-sleep where it is, begins to suckle very lazily at her pert little nipple while Star sighs with pleasure and moves one hand onto the back of his head.

BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

The bedside alarm goes off, and their eyes fly open.


CHAPTER 2

Star looks down, and seeing someone with darker hair than Merrill sucking on her breast, screams, "WHAT THE FUCK?!" and pushes Graham off, pulling a sheet around herself to stand up straight in the middle of the bed.

Graham, trying not to hyperventilate in shock at seeing a beautiful but strange woman in his bed, jumps to stand by the window in his boxer shorts, still sporting an obvious erection. They stare at each other wide-eyed for what feels like an eternity to them both before letting out a combined scream of, "MERRILLLLL!!"

And in flies Merrill from the kitchen, his head moving frantically back and forth between them, having no idea what to make of his older brother and his girlfriend being like this together. Star, keeping that sheet tight around herself, jumps down from the bed to stand behind Merrill and point at Graham. "That creep was sucking my tits!"

"Graham?" Merrill says in disbelief.

"I didn't invite the harlot into my bed," Graham quietly defends himself while throwing on a bathrobe.

"HARLOT? Who the fuck you calling a harlot, preacherboy?" she yells, realizing now just who the man is.

Graham doesn't even deign to look at her anymore. He focuses only on Merrill while he struggles to control feelings of intense anger and shame, something he NEVER feels as he has tried so hard the majority of his 35 years to live his life close to God. - And sadness? Why would I feel sad unless it's because she didn't turn out to be Colleen like I thought? - "I was asleep. Your FRIEND climbed into my bed. Apparently she doesn't know that in THIS house only married couples sleep together." And a hard look is thrown at Merrill to get his point across.

"Sure Graham, I know," Merrill says and pushes Star out of the room while she continues to sputter in anger.

They head down the hallway to Merrill's room next door, passing Bo and Morgan, who are watching everything with interest. At seeing his niece and nephew, Merrill glances back and shrugs apologetically at Graham, whose face has hardened even more at seeing that his children have witnessed this shameful incident.

"Who the fuck does he think he is?" Star spouts as soon as Merrill's bedroom door is closed, not knowing, although she probably wouldn't care if she did, that Graham can still hear them.

"I'm sorry, Star. He didn't really mean to call you that."

- Yes I did! - Graham thinks furiously. - She obviously IS one! And YOU shouldn't be associating with her! -

"A harlot?" Star laughs now. "Merrill, do you think I REALLY care what preacherboy thinks of me? I just didn't appreciate being pawed by him is all." - No matter how nice I have to admit it felt. -

- I did NOT paw her! It was right there! Not my fault I was dreaming about Colleen! - And Graham stomps down the stairs, not willing to overhear another word of it.

"It was just a mistake, Star. He probably thought you were Colleen."

"The dead chick? Whatever. Fine," she shrugs and moves on. "Now what the fuck am I gonna wear, Merrill?"

"Huh?" he looks confused.

"My luggage! The bus company missed my bag. Won't be here until later. If it were just me and you, I wouldn't care, but no way in hell I'm walking around naked in front of that creep!"

Merrill can't help it now. He laughs at her continued use of calling Graham a creep, an absolute absurdity, as he knows, and begins to rummage through his clothes to keep her from seeing him chuckle even more. Unfortunately, he can't find a single pair of pants that will come close to fitting her very slim body. "Sorry, Star. I suck at getting my laundry done. Don't even have another clean shirt yet. I bet Graham does. He's always up on his laundry."

"Oh no! I'm not wearing HIS shirt!" she huffs.

"Well, you could always wear that sheet until we go to town," Merrill laughs at the thought of it.

Looking at him angrily, she suddenly snorts with amusement, the bad mood gone now. "Fine, if you don't think he'll send me to hell for it."

"Graham isn't THAT kind of a minister," Merrill laughs again and runs into Graham's room to grab a shirt. - He won't care. It's just a shirt. Too bad he already gave all Colleen's stuff to charity. -

Yes, it is too bad, because although the shirt is just a plain white collared long sleeved button-down cotton shirt, it barely reaches her knees in the front and back and leaves the sides fairly open. "Nice," Merrill says with a hint of huskiness in his voice and a shine in his eyes. "Just like wearing a night shirt."

"Maybe we should pretend it is," she purrs, walking into his arms to kiss him. And kissing him after all this time apart, Star is reminded yet again of how thankful she is that she broke up with Tony and started dating Merrill. - Tony woulda broken that weirdo's legs and probably even mine, no matter how innocent it was. Merrill is cool. He doesn't try to change me like Tony did. Nice kid. -

***********************

Merrill came to the city months ago to play minor-league ball, and Star remembers vividly the first time she saw him sitting in the locker room. He was alone in the corner, the new man on the team, and he looked very lost, not just lost but upset, very upset at something.

The night ball game was about to begin, and Star walked towards him, suddenly remembering the nightmare she had had that morning just before waking. Seeing the new kid was bringing it back for some reason, a nightmare about a b-movie looking monster carrying her while two men she couldn't quite see in the distance were running through a cornfield trying to save her.

If the terror hadn't felt so real in the dream, she would have laughed at the foolishness of it. - Monster looked like something outta the 50's! And a fucking cornfield? I've never even seen one in real life! Why the fuck would I be in a cornfield?! I gotta stop reading Stephen King books! Surprised there weren't any evil children in the dream too! -

"You must be the new kid Tony hired," she said, standing over Merrill. "I'm Star Kennedy, Tony's assistant. You need anything, you come to me and I'll see what I can do."

"Thanks, I'm Merrill Hess, and I really need to go home now, Ma'am."

"What? You fucking with me? You just got here! You're playing right now!"

"I... I...can't," and Merrill stood, pulling off his game jacket.

"What's the matter, kid? You look white as a ghost. Someone die?" Star asked, trying to make sense of why the newest recruit would want to leave.

"Yes, Ma'am. My brother just called me. His wife was killed tonight."

"Shit, I'm sorry Merrill. You go home and take care of family. Call us tomorrow. And don't call me Ma'am."

"Thank you Miss Kennedy," he nodded gratefully and started for the door.

"Wait a minute!" Tony shouted, coming up behind them.

"Merrill, I heard you got a phone call a few minutes ago in the office. What the fuck is going on? You're not leaving until AFTER the game!"

"Tony," Star said calmly. "Merrill is in no shape to play his best right now. We can replace him for a couple games while his family deals with this."

"No. He signed a contract. His ass is mine."

"Tony," she smiled up at him. "How would you feel if I died?"

He glanced down at her, mouth smirking. "Well, you can be such a bitch sometimes I'd probably dance on your grave first, but then I guess I'd start missing ya, Babe." And his arms opened for her to walk into and whisper, "Let the kid go. It's not the end of the world."

"Fine," he grumbled. "Get outta here. Call me tomorrow."

Not taking a chance Tony would change his mind, Merrill quickly ran out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Only two weeks later, Merrill was back in the city, Graham having insisted that he return and not ruin his chance at a pro ball career over something no one could change. For Star, those two weeks were also a time of change. She was beginning to think that it was time to dump Tony. As much as they had fun together, and the sex was great, the man was just too damn possessive and hot-tempered. Plus, he wanted her to stop her other job, the one that REALLY made her money, the job she met him at.

She was grateful, however, that they had met and that he hired her to work as his assistant for the team, as the pay and hours weren't bad. But, she knew she didn't really need the job and was mostly only doing it for her own love of baseball, meeting other fans and the travel opportunities that went with it. Tony even wanted her to move in with him, thereby not needing the money from her other job to support herself, but Star continued to hold him off, not ready to give up her independence yet, even at almost 30, to a man she was not entirely comfortable with.

She was sitting in the bar with the rest of the team one night when Merrill walked in, and she immediately waved him over. Merrill smiled shyly as she introduced him to everyone again, and he was soon teased when they realized that he wouldn't drink or smoke and would keep calling her Miss Kennedy, although she repeatedly told him to call her Star like everyone else.

"That's a real pretty name," he said, as the men laughed and made ooooing noises, sensing the start of a crush.

Star humorously slapped a couple of them and explained her name. "It's a very old family surname my mother decided to use for my first name. The surname had two R's at the end of it, but I go with one R. But Merrill, if you wanna talk about your sister-in-law, just let me know and we'll leave these cretins behind."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn't long before Star realized that she was truly enjoying spending time with Merrill. - Kid's real nice, almost naïve. Probably could use someone to watch over him around here so the sharks like Tony don't take advantage of him. - And over time, Star and Merrill became even friendlier, as she deliberately pulled further and further away from Tony. Merrill even opened up about the accident, holding back his tears as he told her how his sister-in-law died and all about his only family, his older brother, 6-year-old niece and 11-year-old nephew.

- Sounds like a nice family, - Star thought. - Too bad about the sister-in-law. - But when Merrill told her what his brother did for a living, Star's prejudices about religion changed her mind. - Probably another fanatic like my fucking uncle was! Like SO many of them are! Damn bastard! Hope he's burning in that hell he believed in! -

Merrill continued to talk about his country life in the boring little town that he was eager to escape from, a town where his brother was highly respected and he was nothing but the younger brother who played ball good. He tried to get Star to talk about her own past, but Star would say very little, always purposely allusive on the subject. All she would tell him was what she had told everyone else; her parents died in a car accident when she was young, she lived with her father's widowed brother-in-law for a few years, and then she went out on her own as soon as she could. She had no family left anymore.

It wasn't long before Star and Tony finally had it out one night. "Sick of it, Tony. I'm not changing for you or any guy. We're over."

"You bitch! I can fire you!" he was quick to threaten.

"Go ahead! See if you can find someone else that can do this job!"

She was right. Star was very good at her job for the team. "Just .. just stay the fuck away from me at work!" he quickly changed his mind. - Stay cool. Let her go and make her pay later. -

Unfortunately, the next week he noticed that she and Merrill were sitting even closer together than usual in quiet conversation at the bar, and he wondered if Merrill had been putting the moves on his woman. - Bitch dumped me for the fucking country bumpkin! Get him some day too! -

Merrill, although in love with Star and knowing that she was single, was too shy to make a move and sat as though waiting for divine intervention. Star could feel that the kid liked her, and although he may have acted like a kid in some ways, but was definitely a man, she decided to take the initiative. "Merrill, if you wanna go out with me, stop staring and start talking 'cuz now is the time."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They started out slowly, and Star was quick to be sure that Merrill understood that they were NOT exclusive. As much as she liked him, she was not about to jump into another relationship just yet. And, thankfully for her, Merrill accepted her choice, although he was used to only dating one woman at a time. He certainly didn't like it, but he sat back and watched her date other men too, feeling that if he stuck it out long enough, she might fall for him like he had fallen for her.

A few weeks later the team went on strike and the men began heading home, knowing that they would be called back when and if things worked out. Merrill had been secretly hoping that Graham would come to the city to see him play ball, but it was just too soon after Colleen, and Graham was having a hard enough time getting himself out of bed in the morning.

Not having the money to stay in the city any longer, Merrill sadly realized that he had to go home too. He never knew just how close to living with Star he came, but she had decided, after much contemplation, that no matter how fond of him she was, she was not about to share her life with him or any man.

Star had been purposely not thinking about the strange dreams she had been having ever since she meet Merrill; dreams about babies, gardens, big houses and cornfields. She realized, trying to think logically, that it was probably due to her approaching 30 and it was her body's way of simply telling her it was time to settle down and reproduce, a genetic need that many people want to do.

- But I don't want to! Not yet! So what if I'm turning 30! Mariah said that she saw a lot of things changing for me at 30, but Merrill can't be the one for me? Can he? Maybe I should tell the group about my dreams. Get some feedback. - Unfortunately, her other job kept her so busy at nights, the best time to reach them, women with busy lives of their own, that Star soon forgot about it almost entirely.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The last night, just before Merrill was scheduled to return home, they were riding the elevator down from the nice restaurant at the top of the tower when Star decided it was high time she took the bull by the horns. It had been weeks of dating and Merrill still hadn't worked up the courage to do more than hold her hand. She stopped the elevator, and he looked at her in surprise. "Well?" she said, feeling a sudden need to 'take' this particular man, a feeling telling her that it was very important that she do so before it was too late.

"Well what?" he asked, almost fearfully. Merrill would never tell anyone, but he was almost afraid of Star because of the way she acted, dressed, and talked so differently from the girls in his small hometown that he was used to.

"Merrill, I'm pretty used to taking what I want, and I'm pretty used to going out with guys who are the same," she tried to explain.

And Merrill blushed, blushed brilliantly in understanding, but before he had a chance to respond, she slammed him up against the elevator wall and began kissing him hard. Without showing any shyness, he kissed her back, feeling thrilled that this beautiful woman wanted him and that he didn't have to make the first move and possibly be rejected after all.

Although a small town boy, he was no virgin, but he had only been with one girl the night a group of friends got drunk at senior graduation. After that, while the girl went off to college, he had worried for so long that he might have made her pregnant that he had made sure not to do it again with anyone. Merrill, raised in a strict religious home, was quite terrified of being punished by God. When the girl finally came home from college on break, she almost laughed at him while she assured him that he didn't make her pregnant, that she was on the pill and was even engaged and sleeping with a senior in college. Merrill slowly began to realize that year that what people say and do in public did not necessarily mean what they say and do in private. That just because his parents and big brother were 'models of Christian values', that other good people may not be so restrained in private no matter how often they attended church and prayed too. However, he was never able to get past his natural shyness before meeting Star at 25, and up until then, he had only had a small handful of girlfriends from his town, with romance never going past kissing and light touching.

Star swiftly pulled his pants down while they kissed and jumped right onto him, her short skirt with no panties the perfect outfit for this. And Merrill surrendered happily, letting her take complete control as she rode him up and down against the elevator wall and cried out her pleasure only moments before he did.

Only minutes after it started, it was over, and she jumped off him without a word and started the elevator right back up. Embarrassment began to run through Merrill, as he pulled up his pants and wondered if he should say something. Smiling with obvious affection, she looked over at him, tried not to laugh at the blush on his face, and exited the elevator. Out on the street, ready to go their separate ways and possibly never see each other again, Merrill finally said the first normal thing that came to mind, something he hadn't even considered until just that very moment. "Star, if you'd like, if you have time while the strike is on, maybe you could come to the country and visit me?"

"Thanks for the invite, Merrill. I'll be in touch." And she blew him a kiss and walked away with the strange feeling that she had just accomplished something much more important than fulfilling a sexual craving with a nice looking man.

CHAPTER 3

(BACK TO PRESENT DAY)

"Merrill . ," they hear Graham call up the stairs.

Merrill knows what his brother is doing, warning him to get out of the room. It's not appropriate in Graham's eyes for him and Star to be in there alone for any amount of time.

"We're coming, Graham," he calls back, pulling out of Star's arms. "Come on, let's get some breakfast. Graham is a great cook."

He is, but he almost drops his son's plate of food when he sees Star wearing one of his shirts and nothing else. An intense look at Merrill, and it is quickly explained to him. He nods back at his younger brother, not happy about it, and announces, without looking at Star, as he sits down at the large table, "I have to go into town soon. We can stop by the station and see if her bag is in yet."

"Good," she says, sitting down opposite him in the seat left vacant since Colleen died. "Where's your laundry room, Rev? I don't even have a clean thong after the crap I went through to get here last night."

Merrill's eyes widen, and Graham looks at her now and snaps, "Maybe if you had come on the bus when you said you were going to, you wouldn't have to wear MY shirt. You kept me and my children waiting in that terminal for hours before we gave up."

"Go to hell," she snaps back.

"Get out of my wife's chair!" he shouts, jumping up as the kids and Merrill shrink down in their own chairs. Before their mother died they had never once seen their father lose his temper or utter an angry word, but the last few months, instead of healing, he has become more and more bitter, with less and less laughter heard in their once happy home.

Star smirks and slowly stands up, as Graham continues quieter through gritted teeth, "I would appreciate it, Miss Kennedy, if you would not use inappropriate language around my family."

"Really?" she smiles, leaning forward with her hands on the table. "Merrill doesn't mind. Do you, honey?"

Merrill has sunk even further in his chair and looks like he's about to vomit now. "Just in front of the kids," he says quietly, pleading with his eyes at her. "That's what Graham meant."

Graham's fist slams down on the table, although he manages to keep his voice low. "No, I said around my family. That included ME, the HEAD of this family. What you two do in private is your concern, although NOT in this house."

"Fine," she says, sitting back down in Colleen's chair. "I like the fresh air. Lots of places in private around here, I bet." And she begins to stroke Merrill's thigh under the table, making him fidget in his seat.

Graham, of course, knows what she's alluding to, but decides to drop it now. He's made his point, and he's not about to lose his temper again over a chair. Walking over to the refrigerator, pausing for just a moment to think - HARLOT! - when he sees her hand in Merrill's lap, he continues on with getting breakfast for his family.

Merrill, a little uncomfortable at being touched under the table, stands to help his brother, and Star, not really hungry, as usual, grabs an apple and states to the room, "I'll be outside. Getting a little stuffy in here for my taste." Graham does not miss the flash of a smile Merrill tries to hide from him.

Out onto the large porch, Star immediately lights up a cig. "Merrill," Graham says, watching her from the window. "You didn't tell me she smoked. Anything else you haven't told me?"

"Not that I can think of. Don't worry. I'll tell her not to smoke in the house."

"She better not," he warns. "And not just because I don't approve of smoking, but you know Morgan isn't supposed to be around it with his asthma."

"I know," Merrill nods and heads upstairs to get ready for a trip into town while Graham begins to wash the breakfast dishes. Keeping his eye on the stranger, he watches as she moves from a shadowed spot on the porch into direct sunlight. - Oh My LORD! - he gasps inwardly at seeing the sun stream through the white cotton shirt, fully highlighting her naked body beneath, every womanly curve suddenly available to his eyes.

The sun is glistening around her through her long strawberry blonde hair, making it shine like rubies and form a reddish-golden halo around her head. But the ethereal image is soon shattered when Star brings the cigarette to her lips and inhales deeply, turning around as though sensing eyes on her and seeing that Graham is staring wide-eyed at her.

She furrows her brows, wondering why the man looks so strange, and glances over her shoulder expecting to see something that must have caught his interest. But seeing nothing behind her, she suddenly realizes what has happened, and she angrily flicks her cigarette at him and stomps off the porch. Blue eyes in the kitchen blink rapidly, forcing down the unwanted ache spreading in his groin, and he swiftly turns back to the dishes to put that heavenly sight of her out of his mind.

CRASH! He's running out the door at the noise and sees Star prone on the ground, a fallen trashcan next to her. "Star!" he yells and rushes over to her, lifting her head up.

Her eyes open, and she looks up at him, relief filling her for just a moment before seeing IT again over his shoulder. Another moan of fear, and Star faints once more. "What happened?" Merrill shouts at seeing Graham carry her into the house.

"I don't know. She's fainted, twice, I think," he answers, as he lays her on the couch and grabs the phone. "Something spooked her. Look around the yard while I call the doctor."

"No, wait," she interjects, sitting up. "I'm ok, Rev. Really. Can't believe I fucking fainted."

Graham decides to ignore the profanity under the circumstances. "What happened? Did you see something? Do you have a medical condition?"

"Me? Nope. Perfectly healthy. Must just be all this fresh air and SUNSHINE I'm not used to in the city, is all," she replies, looking at him pointedly to turn the attention away from her.

"OK. If you're sure," he turns away, feeling a little hot under the collar at the sunshine reference.

"That's what I said," she snaps and practically leaps off the couch to stalk upstairs. Discussion over.

In seconds, though, she is sitting alone on the floor of the bathroom, crying. Star knows why she fainted. She just doesn't understand it. Everything was going along fine until she looked over and saw ... the cornfield. - Maybe I should leave? Something's going on. I can feel it! -

Graham walks by, sees the light on and the door closed and hears her soft crying. His hand lifts to knock, automatically wanting to help a person in distress like any good minister would, but he hesitates, sensing correctly that this particular person will in no way appreciate help from him. Walking to his room now, he begins to wonder again at what she could have possibly seen that would make her faint and then cry. His church training and instincts are very good at telling when people lie, and Graham knows that Star does indeed know just why she fainted, but, for some reason, does not want them to know.

She comes out, carefully drying her eyes just as Merrill knocks worriedly on the door. Another assurance to him that she's fine, and she has him show her the laundry room, soon throwing together her dirty clothes and the kid's to make a full load in the washer. Sitting alone in the laundry room now, the entire family gone to town, Star begins to wonder again if she should leave.

Normally, the kids would have been left behind for just a quick trip into town, as they are old enough to remain in the house for short periods of time during the day, but there was no way Graham would leave them with a stranger, and quickly made promises to buy them both ice cream if they came along without complaint. He is not comfortable with the woman's inability to get along with him the way it should be as she is the guest in HIS house, and he is convinced already that she is trouble. - There's something wrong with her. Probably buried deep down making her act this way. Have to talk to Merrill before he does something rash. -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Her bag is soon picked up at the station, a few errands run along with the promised ice cream, and they're back home for the day. During the short time away, however, UPS arrived with boxes for Star, and she's sitting comfortably in their re-arranged living room, smoking and surveying her new temporary office.

Merrill quickly looks over at Graham, who is beginning to turn colors, trying not to explode in front of the kids. "Graham," Merrill whispers. "I forgot to tell her not to smoke in the house. It's my fault."

Furious eyes swing on Merrill. "Take care of it right now or she's going back to the city where she belongs!"

And Star looks up, noticing them now as she chats away on her second cell phone. The country style living room has been fitted with a large computer station, complete with printer, fax, scanner and everything else she needs to continue running Team business while she is on vacation. The team may be on strike, but there is still work she needs to do under the assumption that the strike will eventually come to an amicable end.

*PUUUFFF* Star has seen the look on Graham's face and deliberately blew smoke at him, assuming correctly that being a strict minister, he probably considers smoking a sinful and unhealthy vice. His mouth opens, but thinking better of it, he turns and pushes the kids back outside while Merrill speaks up, "Star, Morgan has asthma. Please don't smoke in the house."

"Geez, Merrill. I'm sorry, didn't know," she grumps, and feeling bad now for the kid, quickly puts it out.

Graham turns back to her. "I want all this .. stuff put into the spare room."

"No can do. I already checked. Mine and Merrill's rooms don't have the right type of plugs I need. I could use YOUR room, though. It's even big enough."

Graham's mouth begins to twitch at the thought of all this high tech equipment in his room. The house may have ONE color TV with cable and VCR in the living room, but that is ALL he wants in his home. In response to her suggestion, however, his arms go up in defeat, and he walks upstairs.

A smile of triumph, and she goes right back to work, showing Merrill what he can do to help. And when she finally has a spare minute, it's upstairs to get dressed in the spare room, passing Graham in the hallway on the way back down. One look at the clothing she's chosen, miniskirt with low cut blouse, and his features show his disapproval. - She even dresses like one! Surprised she doesn't paint her face too! -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dinnertime comes and Star finds Merrill helping Graham in the kitchen. Immediately, she pitches in, wanting to help earn her keep since she's hoping for a nice long vacation with Merrill, but she soon notices that Graham is looking at her incredulously as he watches her ask his brother how to do things.

"Didn't your mother teach you how to cook?" he asks, speaking directly to her for the first time in hours.

"No, she was too busy getting hit by a car," she snaps.

Merrill drops a pan, regretting very much now that he hadn't taken the time to mention to Graham about her parents dieing when she was so young. And Graham doesn't know what to say; it hits too close to home for him where his wife in concerned. "Sorry," he mumbles at the floor, as he walks out of the room.

Star doesn't feel bad for him at all, feeling that Graham started it by questioning her cooking background. But she does think again about the details that Merrill told her of how Colleen died out walking on that country road. - Pinned between a truck and a tree by a guy who fell asleep at the wheel. Alive just long enough to talk to her husband who was called to the scene. Must have been horrible. - And so horrible, she's heard, for the husband and children, that Graham has taken down and put away all pictures of Colleen until he, Bo and Morgan are ready to face them again.

She and Merrill finish making dinner while she watches Graham sit on the porch, looking out at the dirt road. Occasionally, his mouth moves, and she asks Merrill what he's doing, "Guy talking to himself?"

"Probably praying. He never used to do it out loud to himself until Colleen died. I guess it helps him."

"Why bother? No one's listening," she snorts, and Merrill looks away, knowing that Star has a problem with religion although he has not yet worked up the courage to ask her about it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At dinner, while he looks at Merrill, Graham recites a longer than normal dinner prayer that has been expanded to include a lecture on temptation and sin. Star tries hard not to laugh at the man's solemness, and Graham notices. "Do you have something you'd like to add, Miss Kennedy?"

"Yeah, could you tell your god to hurry up and end the baseball strike?"

Graham bites his lip, carefully smiling at his children, who are watching him for his reaction, and says quite evenly, "I'll see what I can do."

- Touché! - she thinks, giving him the credit he deserves for not starting an argument in front of the kids.

BERRILLLL! Star's cell phone rings while Graham frowns at the interruption of the evening family meal. Not particularly wanting to talk in front of them anyways, she immediately gets up and leaves the room for the remainder of the meal. An hour later the table has been completely cleared except for Star's plate that is still waiting for her. And she stands over it now, picking up a roll to take a bite, drink the milk, and dump the rest into the trash.

"Wasteful," Graham says quietly from the doorway.

"You want me to dig it out so you can send it to some poor people?" she quips.

Eyes narrow at her for a moment, and with a shake of his head, he's gone.

Darkness soon falls and Graham turns on the news while the kids head upstairs to play in their room and the three adults settle down to watch a political debate. Naturally, Star and Graham immediately begin arguing, as Graham is a very conservative Republican and Star is a very liberal Democrat. Merrill doesn't even vote, having little interest in politics, but he watches with interest as Star is able to debate logically and maturely against his brother better than anyone else he's ever seen.

Graham, used to people valuing his opinion as the town minister, is not really liking how this woman seems to go against just about everything he believes in, and also, even worse, seems to enjoy making sure that he knows she does. Their conversation stays quite friendly-like, however, until the issue of abortion comes up, and it suddenly turns so heated that Star comes very close to throwing her drink in his self-righteous chauvinistic face. "I'm going to bed," she stands, looking pointedly at Merrill.

Merrill immediately glances at Graham, whose eyes narrow warningly to him about this new subject. "Why don't we go for a walk first?" Merrill suggests, and Star smiles back at him, "Are you sure WALKING is allowed around here?" Before Graham can say anything, though, Merrill has jumped up and pushed Star out of the room.

Remembering that morning, Graham quickly watches out the window as Star steps out of the house for the first time since she fainted. All the outside lights are on, lighting up the yard until he retires to bed, and he sees her hesitate in step, freezing for a moment as she stares at the cornfield. He just can't see anything that would frighten anyone in the field, and he continues to watch as she pulls Merrill behind the barn. But not particularly wanting to think about his younger brother about to commit a sin of flesh on their property, he starts to turn away until he catches sight of their shadows displayed on the opposite tool shed wall.

One minute it is two separate shadows, the next, the smaller one has jumped into the larger one, and they quickly begin moving in a way Graham easily recognizes but has no desire to see. - Going to talk to him first thing in the morning! - he thinks furiously. - What if they have relations during the day and the kids walk into it? Maybe I should let them share a room? .... NO! ... Sets a bad example and it's wrong! Plain wrong! If they want to sin, they'll have to do it under God's eye outside, not in my house! Lord, I hope he's remembering to use protection! -

A few minutes later, they return to the house, all rumpled, laughing and holding hands, and Graham stands, looks at them staring back at him, then shuts the outside lights off and silently goes to bed. Merrill knows his brother is upset. - But I have a right to do what I want! I'm an adult for Christ's sake! It's MY property too. He's lucky I love and respect him enough to live by his rules in the house. He's just going to have to get over it. Thank you God for making me a ball player so I could meet Star! -

Soon Graham can hear them talking in the hallway upstairs outside their rooms. Star is trying to convince Merrill to sleep in her room with her. "What's he gonna do, Merrill? Spank you like a child? Condemn you to hell?"

"I ... I can't Star. I WANT to, believe me. If we were ANYWHERE else, I would in a heartbeat. But I can't do this to him. He really lives by his beliefs, and a lot of those beliefs I do share with him, although NOT this one obviously. He's just been through too much recently. I can't hurt him over this. Please understand."

"Fine," she rolls her eyes. "But you're really missing out, Babe. I do my best work at the witching hour, ya know." And she laughs in a way that makes Merrill groan with frustration and run into his room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MIDNIGHT: Graham hears a noise on the long porch roof outside the bedroom windows. He looks out and over towards the noise and sees an almost unbelievable sight. Star is completely naked and standing straight on the porch roof, her arms reaching up to the sky and the almost full moon.

It freezes him in shock at the display. Two very distinct feelings within him fighting to overwhelm the other; the tell-tale sin of lust filling his groin and a sick feeling of foreboding filling his stomach at what she appears to be doing. Arms and face still held high, her mouth moves in a low chant he can barely hear, and she slowly turns in a full circle before lowering her head and slipping back into her bedroom window.


CHAPTER 4

Graham lays awake most of the night feeling half sick at the same time as he desperately tries to focus his mind on his wife and not that entrancing body he has seen twice now. - Three times if you count her sleeping in my bed! This is insane! I've seen her unclothed more times in less than a day than Colleen in a week! -

In the morning, however, Graham has convinced himself that it MUST have been only a dream and calls Merrill into his room to discuss Star. "I don't like her," he starts in immediately, "but I know you'll see her anyways. I can't tell you not to. I just hope you're using your head, Merrill. You're having relations with her. What if she becomes pregnant? What would people think?"

Merrill, of course, is turning red at talking about this kind of personal stuff with his brother, something that they have never done before, and answers quietly, "Don't worry Graham, she uses something."

"I should have known," Graham snorts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few days go by and Graham mostly avoids Star now. She does sometimes find him sitting and staring out a window, and she ALMOST feels sorry for him, knowing that he is probably thinking about his wife. But at dinner each night, he still makes them sit through a lengthy prayer and continues to enforce, with his disapproving looks, the 'no touching rule' in the house. - Merrill kisses me, and the Rev looks at us just like my Uncle did. He's a fanatic too. Just hides it better 'cuz he isn't an alchie like that prick was. -

For his part, Graham has noticed that his kids are enjoying spending time with Star. She doesn't swear around them, although she refuses to hold back for Graham's sake, and he often sees her playing games like hide and seek with them. "Ready or not, here I come!" she shouts, as Graham watches from the window and Merrill is at work in town.

She walks all around the yard for a while, unable to find them, and comes to stand in front of the cornfield. Giggling can be heard coming from that area, and she knows that the two must be hiding somewhere between the rows. The sun is setting, and Star begins to wonder if she should just call it quits and tell the kids she gives up. - Fuck it. It's just a cornfield. Kids are in there. Why the hell should I be scared of going in too? Gotta get over this! -

Very interested, Graham watches her walk slowly towards the field. He can even see that she is beginning to shake with fear, and he starts to wonder if he should call the kids in, himself. - The woman is terrified. Why? It's just a cornfield. Been there all my life. Know it like the back of my hand. -

Star's about to wish she did too.

A deep breath, and she steps in. And when nothing happens, no scary monster grabbing her, she sighs with relief and starts searching. The kids keep running from her, though, deeper into the field as it gets darker, and soon she starts to lose her bearings, not at all able to see over the long stalks and trying now to hold back the feeling of real fear enveloping her again.

When Graham sees the kids come out of the field without her and begin laughing as they wait for her to find them, he immediately jumps out of his chair, his gut telling him that the woman needs help. A wind has picked up, it's almost dark, and shadows are everywhere. The cornhusks are whipping in her face, as she rushes through them trying to find her way to the safety her instincts keep telling her she has to run for.

She's panting in fear now, running as fast as she can, tripping and falling, but afraid, so very afraid to cry out for help or the 'monster' will find her first. Although her mind knows that she is being irrational, she can't help it; the fear is just too overpowering for even someone of her inner-strength. "AIEEEIEEE!!" she screams loudly when she runs into something big and very solid and feels it grab her arms in the darkness.

"STAR! Calm down! It's me! You're OK!" Graham yells in her face, struggling to keep her still.

"Oh Gaia!" she pants, looking around him and falling with relief against his strong chest.


His arms immediately wrap around her, and he murmurs gently in her ear, "It's OK. Nothing out here. It's OK. I'm here .... ,"

Slowly her shaking stops, her breath becoming even again, and she suddenly realizes that she's pressed tight against Graham .... Graham of all people who is actually trying to comfort her .... and succeeding at it. Roughly pulling herself out of his embrace, she laughs nervously, "Thanks. Just lost my bearings in the dark. Not a country gal, ya know."

"Happens to city people all the time," he nods and takes a step back. "Would you like to talk about WHY it scares you?"

"No," she answers sharply. "Just get me the fuck outta here."

Graham sighs at the language and silently walks away, as she tries to follow him and keep up. He's moving too fast, however, and it's much too dark now. "Graham? Please!" she cries, hating the tone of pleading in her voice, but unable to hold it back as she loses sight of him.

He stops instantly, also hearing the fright in her voice and walks back to her. Looking at her for a moment, her eyes wide with fright shining in the moonlight, he turns back around and holds out his hand behind him. Star doesn't hesitate. She immediately grabs tight to his hand, and walking closely behind him now, feels much safer.

When she finally sees the house through the rows, though, that hand of his is dropped, and she sprints as fast as she can right past him and into the yard. The kids, seeing her, start laughing, as she exclaims, "Found you!" ..... ready to forget the whole damn thing now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Soon after, at bedtime prayers, Star overhears a strange conversation from the hallway. "Do me a favor?" Graham says to the kids as he tucks them in. "Stay out of the cornfield when you play hide and seek with Star."

"Why?" they immediately ask.

"She's not used to it. Doesn't know her way around like we do."

"She will some day," his daughter states firmly, as her brother smiles in agreement.

"Why do you say that?" Graham asks, knowing his daughter often says strange things that even stranger seem to have a way of appearing almost prophetic.

"Are you going to marry her?" she asks, changing the subject. "Mommy and I think you should."

"WHAT?!" he almost falls on his ass from the crouch by her bed. "No, of course not. And what do you mean about Mommy?"

"She told me in my dream. She said she's always liked Star."

"I bet Uncle Merrill will," Morgan interrupts. "I see them kissing a lot." And Graham rolls his eyes, feeling thankful that it's only kissing that he's seeing, something that he, himself, did not hesitate to enjoy with Colleen occasionally in front of their children.

"Well, I'm glad you dream about Mommy, Bo. But you do know it's just a dream?"

"Of course, Daddy," she says in a way that he knows she doesn't really mean it.

With a shake of his head, he heads downstairs to see Star, who has only gotten there moments before him, guzzling straight from a bottle of wine on the porch while she stares angrily at the cornfield. He pauses and then walks out to confront her. "Didn't Merrill tell you that we don't keep liquor in this house?"

"Fine," she snarls, takes another long swallow and throws it at him, the bottle just missing its target and crashing into pieces against the door.

Before he can say anything, she's off the porch and wobbling down the driveway to the road. "Star!" he shouts, "Come back! You're drunk! Don't walk the road at night! It's not safe!"

"Don't worry, Rev! I walked here from the station!" she shouts back drunkenly. "I think I can handle a little stroll! Maybe you'll get lucky and I'll be hit too! Save you from having to keep praying over Merrill's poor soul!"

Graham is becoming furious now and almost turns around to walk back into the house. But knowing that she's drunk and what happened to Colleen that terrible night, an evening of rare fighting between them before he left her alone, a mistake that he'll pay for the rest of his life now, makes him run down the driveway to bring Star back, not about to live life with a second mistake.

Star turns around in her haze, hearing noise behind her, and seeing only a large figure in the darkness of the road, screams, "Stay away!" and runs to fall immediately into mud.

Graham tries to scoop her up, but her foot lashes out and trips him, making him land hard on her now, which, in turn, makes her scream even louder in fear, convinced in her drunken mind that the monster has finally caught her. She's hitting him and thrashing under him in the mud, as he frantically grabs at her hands in the darkness and tries to hold her down. "Star! Stop!" he yells futilely.

Suddenly, she sees something over the 'monster's' shoulder. - A shooting star! Another sign? - her mind reels, and she looks up at the 'monster' closely now, finally recognizing that it's Graham on top of her, not hurting her, just holding her so that she won't hurt herself or him.

In another moment of clarity, she also realizes where they are; lying in the mud in the middle of the road, the road his wife was killed on walking at night. - No wonder he chased me. He was worried for his brother's drunken girlfriend. -

"You can get off me now, Rev," she says quietly, beginning to feel the sign of something growing warm and hard between them.

"Of course," he grunts and jumps to his feet, holding his hand out to help her up as he would do for anyone.

The hand is refused, and she jumps up herself. - Too fast! - she realizes. The alcohol she had chugged down in only minutes is hitting her like a ton of bricks again, and down she goes, passing out in his arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He was about to just leave her on the couch, but seeing in the light of the living room how filthy they both are, he gently places her on the floor and tries to wake her up, with no success. The city woman is out cold. - Oh Lord! Merrill's going to be home soon! What can I tell him? What if she tells him I attacked her? He wouldn't believe her .... would he? The way she was hitting me and screaming, she really DID think I was attacking her at first. Who knows what she'll remember when she wakes up. I've got to get her cleaned up before he gets home! -

Upstairs now, he lays her in the tub and turns the shower on cold, hoping that it will wake her. Although the water pounds hard on her dirty clothes, Star does not move. And after a minute passes, he gives up, looks at his watch worriedly, turns the water to warm, takes a deep breath, and begins to strip her clothes off, being very careful not to look too closely, of course.

- She doesn't wear a bra? - he thinks in amazement when his eyes fall on her perfect bare breasts. But almost immediately, he forces himself to look away and slowly pull down her skirt. - No underwear?! What kind of a woman is she?! - He's just about to look away again when his eyes fall on the small neat patch of strawberry blonde hair nestled above her womanhood. - What is that? - he thinks, seeing dark lines under it. - Don't look, don't look, don't look, - he suddenly tells himself frantically. - You DON'T want to know! -

But Graham can't stop himself, and checking her face again to be sure that she's still very much out, he carefully pushes her soft pubic hair aside and falls backwards in shock, the back of his hand flying to cover his mouth and keep from shouting out loud. Staring back at Graham, a minister of God suffering a crisis of faith, is a black line tattoo of an upside-down star, a pentagram, commonly referred to as ... The Devil's Sign.


CHAPTER 5

A moan from Star, and Graham jumps so hard in fright his head hits the bottom of the sink, struggling valiantly not to pass out on the bathroom floor. Pulling himself to his feet, pure terror keeping him from giving in to the blackness behind his eyes, he flies from the room, leaping down the stairs four at a time. Half way down, he suddenly remembers his kids and runs back up, skidding and tripping almost comically down the hallway past the bathroom again, trying desperately to keep his balance and save his family from the Evil Devil Woman in his bathtub.

Just as he is about to throw open their bedroom door and carry them both to safety, his rational mind pushes through the horror of what he saw, and he stops to catch his breath and think for a moment. - Lots of people have tattoos of evil things on them! It doesn't necessarily mean she's part of some cult .... does it? Her name is Star. Maybe it's just a symbol of her name? And when she looks down on it, it would be just a plain star, not the Devil's Sign ... right? That HAS to be it! Lord, if she were REALLY evil, she wouldn't be so afraid of a harmless cornfield .... right? I'm sure Merrill would have noticed by now if it were more than just a simple star tattoo. He's crazy about her, but even he wouldn't fall for a real Devil Cult member ... would he? Lord God I hope not! Don't have the strength to deal with that too! Have to keep a closer eye on her from now on! -

Thankfully for Star, or she might have found herself doused with holy water by now, Graham, in his fear and then logic, has forgotten about the 'dream' of her on the porch, and he cautiously re-enters the bathroom, half expecting fire and brimstone to fly at him. She is lying silent again, and with trembling hands, he begins to wash away the mud streaks and clean her hair with soap, shampoo and a soft cloth. When he's satisfied that she's clean enough, he starts to lift her back out until he realizes that his own clothes are still just as dirty as hers.

Standing now, he glances at his watch and quickly strips down to his boxers, lifts her out, dries her off and carries her naked to her room where he carefully puts a clean t-shirt on her. - Darn, probably sleeps nude, - but the shirt stays on her, and he pulls the blankets up.

Eyes flutter open just enough to see who she thinks must be Merrill standing over her in the darkness, and she rolls over with a "Mmmmm.... thanks, Baby," and passes back out.

- She called me baby? I thought she pretty much hated me? -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning .... "Whaaa huh?" he cries, jumping upright in his bed to see Star shoving him awake. She's standing in just the t-shirt, and Graham quickly pulls the blanket tight over his hard-on, not about to get out of bed and let her see it again like that first morning.

"You touch me?" she hisses at him.

"What? No!" - Only your womanhood to see that sick tattoo! -

"Then how come the last thing I remember is fighting with you in a mud puddle and here I am all clean now?" And she leans over the bed threateningly, making Graham quickly move further away to avoid another repeat of physical contact.

"Shhhhh!" he says, looking frantically over her shoulder, worried that Merrill will hear. "I had to! Would you rather have explained to Merrill why we were both covered with mud?"

"As a matter of fact ... yeah! Got nothing to hide! Merrill knows I date other men. Although it would be a cold day in hell before I'd date YOU!"

"You're dating others? That's ... that's ...." he tries to form his tongue around the word he really wants to use.

"What Preacherboy? Slutty? Loose? Come on and say it! I know you hate me!"

"It's not my place to judge you," he states very quietly. "Only God can do that."

"God sucks!" she screams and storms out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Breakfast is an even tenser affair than usual because of what they both know happened the night before, and Star quickly gulps down her cup of coffee while skipping on the hearty food. "Something wrong with our food?" Graham asks wearily. "You hardly ever eat anything."

"Surprised you even notice, Rev," she glares at him.

"Kind of hard not to," he shrugs his shoulders. "All you do is smoke and drink coffee."

Merrill just keeps shoveling food in his mouth, watching their usual banter he is fast becoming used to. - Probably should pick up some aspirin. These two could give anyone a headache. -

"Speaking of coffee, this stuff is horrible. Where the fu .. heck (glances at the kids) can a person get a cappuccino?"

"So now there's something wrong with my coffee?"

"Yeah, tastes like .. MUD," she looks pointedly at him, making Graham start to flush with both embarrassment and anger now.

"Let's go into town," Merrill stands up fast. "Maybe we can find cappuccino somewhere."

"Can we go too?" the kids immediately ask their father.

"Sure," Graham forces a smile as a thought comes to mind. "Mind your Uncle Merrill." - So I can start searching The Evil One's room! -

As soon as they head down the driveway, he's running upstairs to her room, fighting his conscious now about doing something he knows is wrong, but feeling sure that protecting his family from the possibility of a sicko cult type person far outweighs the sin of invading her privacy. Very carefully he goes through her things, stopping for a brief moment to look closely at a yellowed picture of a young girl, probably her, with a man and woman holding hands, a woman who looks much like Star with the same light coloring and green eyes.

In her underwear drawer, - Well, at least she wears them occasionally, - he looks through silky lace black and red bikini bottoms, nothing even remotely resembling the plain white cotton ones his wife wore, and finds her diaphram. - That's ONE less thing to worry about. Don't need any illegitimate niece or nephew running around here! Not in MY family! - But then he finds something strange, a book on dreams, and he flips through it to see where she's marked two chapters, one on country settings and one on babies. The bookmark has a phone number scribbled on it that looks vaguely familiar to him, but not quite being able to put his finger on where he's seen it before, he places the book back where he found it. - And what's that? - he thinks, rummaging further to pull out packets of dry herbs. - These better be for making tea! - And once he's satisfied himself that she hasn't brought anything he considers actually evil into his home, he gives up and walks into his room, opening a drawer and pulling out a picture of his wife to run his fingers over the glass for a moment before putting it back with all the others.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In town for the first time since she's arrived almost a week ago, Star watches people openly stare at her. "What the fuck are they looking at?" she asks Merrill when the kids have gone on ahead to the corner variety store.

"Most beautiful woman in town," he smiles back, hoping that she accepts it.

"Yeah right," she rolls her eyes at him. "It's the way I dress, isn't it?"

"Yeah," he admits, hoping she doesn't blow up on the street. "No one dresses like that around here."

"Because it's BACKWARDS!"

"Hey! I agree, Star! I love the way you dress. Just ignore them ... please?"

"Like Graham, huh? You want me to ignore him too?"

"Well, I do wish you two wouldn't fight all the time. Gives me a headache," he smiles.

"For you, Baby, I'll try," she smiles back and kisses him openly in broad daylight on the sidewalk while people continue to stare.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It soon becomes the talk of the town, the strange but beautiful city woman staying with two single men. And Graham's phone begins to ring almost immediately with concerned members of his church, which is most of the town, quite worried for him and Merrill. Although he doesn't quite believe it, himself, he assures them all that his and Merrill's souls are not in any danger and that the woman is just .... different, being from the city and all.

The town's 'official head church lady', sensing something is 'up', decides it's time to do some recognizance. "Father Hess, I hope you haven't forgotten, but it's YOUR turn to host our prayer reading. Tonight would be a very good time for us to come over."

"Mrs. Merman, now isn't really a good time," he tries to tell her. - Not until Star goes home! Good Lord, I can't have them here with her! -

"Oh, Father, you know we'll bring everything we need for the meeting. You don't have to do a thing but read from the good book." - And look your usual sexy self while doing it, - she can't help but think sinfully.

"Fine," he sighs. "I'll see you all tonight." - Just have to make sure Merrill has enough money to keep Star out of the house for a few hours. -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Can I speak to you for a moment in private, Merrill?"

- Whatever, - Star thinks and goes back to playing with the kids while the men walk away.

"Bible study group is coming over tonight. I'd appreciate it if you'd take Star to the movies or something."

"I understand. Got no desire to sit around with them, myself. Once a week in church is enough for me," he laughs while Graham frowns.

Star begins to soon sense, however, that something is going on, as Graham hurries them all through dinner and insists on cleaning up alone afterwards. And when Merrill finally gets around to asking her if she wants to go to the movies .... she knows. - That bastard brother of his is trying to get rid of me! Well fuck him! I ain't going nowhere! - "Sorry, Babe, got a headache."

"Star, you never get sick?" - She never even gets a cold! -

"Well I am now!" she huffs and goes back to her room.

"Merrill," Graham hisses up the stairs. "Hurry up! They're going to be here any minute!"

"I can't! She won't leave! Says she's got a headache."

- LIAR! - he clenches his fists and contemplates confronting her, but just as he is about to take that first step, the church ladies arrive. And now Graham and Merrill are stuck helping them set up the chairs and refreshments while trying not to pay attention at how they deliberately poke around their home as though looking for something.

Quick as a flash, - almost like a herd mentality, - Graham thinks in amusement, they suddenly start announcing at the same time that they need to use the powder room and begin stampeding up the stairs. "But there's one down here too," he tries to tell them, knowing that they already know it but obviously don't care this time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Star can hear them in the hallway talking about her.

"Does anyone know which rooms are whose?" one asks while they shake their heads. And without any hesitation, nice Christian women begin pushing open doors, several of them sighing audibly when they see Graham's bed, and then blushing in shame when the older ladies look crossly at them for daring to have wicked thoughts about the good Reverend.

Merrill's room, they can see, is obviously his with the baseball equipment strewn about the floor, and the kid's room is no doubt theirs too. Only one room left, and Star listens closely. "Well, at least she's not in one of THEIR rooms!" one of the ladies exclaims triumphantly

"I hear you can see almost her entire leg in the skirts she wears. And cleavage too! Betty said she shows much too much. Scandalous that she's staying here with two men!

"Don't you worry, Priscilla. Our good Father would NEVER let anything sinful happen!" The other women nod their heads in agreement, although thinking of Reverend Hess and sin in the same sentence instantly brings back a few of those wicked thoughts to most of them. And satisfied that Christian values are being upheld in their community leader's home, they head back downstairs to take their seats.

A few minutes later, Star steps out of her room hearing Graham's firm voice speaking from the bible. Peeking around the corner, though, she almost runs back to her room. Graham is standing in a full black minister's suit with a white collar, causing her to flash back to her hated uncle. - UGHHH!!! I can't do this! - she thinks for a moment before gathering herself to have some fun with the man.

And into the room she walks, all eyes turning to her. Her hair is pulled back modestly in a large clip, and she's wearing a dressy pair of tan slacks and navy blue blouse, completely buttoned up for once. "May I join in?" she smiles sweetly at Graham, who is staring speechless at her.

When he doesn't answer, she sits down and picks up a bible, resisting an urge not to start ripping it apart and throwing it at him. Graham, of course, soon finds his composure again and begins reading where he left off, although his mind is racing. - WHAT does she think she's doing? She's never shown ANY positive interest in what I do! -

Star spends the time watching him closely as he reads, his tall confident posture, his strong resounding yet smooth voice, but, eventually, she turns so bored that she begins to look around and study the strange reactions on the other ladies staring at him.

Seeing now the wide-eyed adoration on all their eager faces, many with more than a hint of lust flickering at him, she can't help but wonder if she's missing something that's been staring her in the face all week. - Yup, he's handsome all right, - she silently agrees with them. - But lots of guys are. Merrill is sure cute. Guess the Rev has somehow cornered sexy in this neck of the woods by the looks of all these ladies dripping for him. Wonder if he's dating yet? Nahhhhh, probably too soon, following some ridiculous proper mourning ritual or something. -

When discussion time comes, the ladies immediately turn to Star, wanting very much to hear the stranger's thoughts on the beautiful passages their wonderful Reverend has read, and she lets them have it. Very nicely and maturely, Star debates with logic every single little thing Graham said. By the time the night is over, the ladies are completely flabbergasted that this woman would speak so easily against him. And Graham, himself, is quite upset too, but he can't complain at all, as Star never once swore or spoke a single heated word in their debate. She did it all perfectly.

And the more he thinks about it, the more he realizes that he actually enjoyed talking with her this time. - Maybe because I was really able to hear her words for once .... not distracted by that wanton clothing she usually wears. Wish she would always dress appropriately. It would make things a lot smoother between us, assuming she isn't a Devil worshipper after all! -

Merrill, who has spent the entire time listening from the kitchen with the kids, speaks up after the women are gone. "You know, Graham, it kind of reminded me of when you and Colleen would argue once in a while."

Blue eyes flare, and Merrill suddenly wishes that he hadn't opened his mouth. "Star is NOTHING like my wife," he rumbles in a very low voice and slams shut his bible.


CHAPTER 6

The whole family and Star spend time in town the next day, and within the pizza eatery Star overhears a most interesting conversation between some of the village woman concerning Graham. "I can't wait to kiss the Reverend tomorrow!" Dixie sighs. "I dream about it all year long for this one chance!"

- Huh? - Star wonders what the hell they could be talking about.

"You don't think he'll change his mind, do you?" she continues. "You know, being in mourning and all."

"Oh goodness I hope not!" Betty exclaims. "He's been doing the County Fair Kissing Booth for charity since long before he and Colleen were ever married. Although, I don't know HOW she stood it, watching every woman in the county line up to kiss your husband every year. Would have drove me crazy if I were her."

"I know what you mean, but it IS for charity," Dixie agrees, "and Colleen was a good Christian woman. Such a strong marriage they had ... shame. Wonder who will be the next Reverend's wife?"

"Some very lucky lady, that's for sure," Betty laughs. "But he hasn't started dating yet .... much too soon. I'm sure he'll do the proper thing and wait at least a year before even showing interest in a new wife."

"Well, believe me," Dixie laughs now, "I plan on being at the head of THAT line too!"

Star sits back down at the table with Merrill and Graham while the kids continue playing video games, and says with a perfectly even expression, "So Reverend," she purposely uses his full title, "is it considered adultery for a married person to kiss someone other than their spouse?"

He stares across the table at her, wondering why this woman would be asking him such a strange question, but, of course, answers like any good minister would. "Well, yes, of course it is. It would be a sin."

"And sinners go to hell?" she continues, the smallest corner of her mouth turning now.

"Unrepentant sinner do," he says firmly.

"And an unrepentant sinner would be someone that does this kissing thing .... say ... like every year at the country fair?"

*CHOKE* Coffee flies out of Graham's mouth all over the table, and Merrill's face turns white for a second before laughter begins to ripple through him at seeing his 'perfect' brother in such a state. "Guess I'll see you in hell, Rev," Star laughs and returns to the video games with the kids.

While she plays with them again, a gang of women decide to corner Graham at the table to discuss the fair, and Star watches with interest, seeing the definite look of 'trapped animal' on Graham's face. "You'll be there tomorrow, won't you Reverend?" one of them asks. "The church needs you."

Graham glances over at Star, who is smirking openly now, and, as much as he wants to say 'NO', he can't. This is a commitment he's been taking care of for his church ever since his father assured a teenage Graham that it was not a sin to kiss women for charity once a year. And the year he turned 22, Graham was quite grateful for it. It was the first time he kissed Colleen; pretty and shy Colleen he had known all his life and who had come back recently from an extended vacation in Philadelphia. Twenty-year-old Colleen had finally decided that summer that she really DID want to date the state's youngest Reverend, who had just begun to show an interest in her.

"Of course I'll be there," he answers the woman with a strained smile and a glance at Star, "for charity."

Star simply can't resist now and calls out, "Hey Rev! Ya need some sun-block for that trip down under you'll be taking?"

Biting his lips, Graham ignores The Evil One, as he's come to think of her, and continues to discuss the fair and church matters with the women for a few more minutes, as Merrill escapes the table to join Star and the kids. "Merrill," Star asks him, "are you part of this kissing thing too?"

"Would you mind if I was?" he laughs hopefully.

And knowing that the man wants her to act jealous, she easily replies with a smile. "Maybe just a little."

"Well I'm not, anyways. No other guy will go up against Graham. For some reason, when it used to be a regular contest, he always blew them all away with raking in the money. Women only wanted to pay to kiss HIM. Pretty funny, though, the look on his face every year when he sees the line of them waiting. Colleen used to just laugh and laugh."

"What's he doing?" she asks loudly so Graham can hear. "Slipping'em the tongue?"

"Oh my God no!" Merrill cries with laughter. "Graham would never do that! It's just a quick kiss on the lips. But you should see how the women lean forward wanting more. I'm surprised they don't just grab his head and hold him to it longer. Probably would if they weren't so afraid of being ostracized. My friends and I even used to place bets on the side on which women would come back the most, but Graham quickly put a stop to that ... two kiss minimum. So now they just plop that two bucks down on the booth and kiss him twice rather than going back in line. ALL of them."

And they laugh together this time, although Star finds it strange. - Just don't get it! What the fuck is so exciting about the most prudish, boring, aggravating man outside of my uncle I've ever met? Sure, he's handsome, but he ain't no fucking Mel Gibson! -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Before going to bed that night, she and Merrill slip outside to have sex again, walking right past Graham, who doesn't hesitate to give them 'The Look', as Star has named it. When they come back in, Merrill heads into the kitchen to grab a snack, having worked up a healthy appetite, and Graham says very quietly to Star, as she passes him on the way upstairs to bed, "Believe me, I'm not the one who needs sun-block."

"No, you probably don't," she agrees, staring him in the eyes. "But I'd be willing to bet you need a good fuck." And she purposely wiggles her ass at him, as she walks slowly up the stairs, knowing damn well he won't be able to resist watching.

She's right. Graham's hand clenches on the banister, his eyes angrily following her movements, and then it's off quick to his study to read from the bible before bed. Temptation will not find a home in HIS body.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For Fair day, the minister's outfit goes on again and they head back into town. Immediately, Star notices that all the women are watching Graham with predatory eyes, their bodies tensed to charge and be the first woman in line when he steps behind the booth. Graham takes his time, though, as other than that one year he first kissed Colleen, it is only a church duty for him and something he is actually quite embarrassed about due to his popularity at it. - It's just a quick couple of kisses, - he thinks every year when he sees their hungry eyes on him. - No matter how long I live, I'll never understand women. -

When he finally begins to walk over to the booth, all eyes turn to him again, and suddenly the mad rush is on. Women are walking as fast as they can without actually running to get in line. It doesn't go unnoticed. Graham glances over at Merrill and rolls his eyes, and Merrill keeps his hand over his face to keep from laughing out loud at the predictable yearly scene.

Much later, the line is finally whittling down, and Graham is wishing for the hundredth time that the church didn't need the money so badly. "Star," Merrill says after he's just come back from getting them drinks. "Would you do me a favor?"

"Sure, Babe. What?"

"Get in line please."

"WHAT?" - No way I heard him right! -

"Some folks are talking," he tries to explain. "They think it's strange that you're the only woman at the fair that hasn't plunked down the money for charity yet."

"Fine," she sighs. "They want money, I'll write a check."

"Star! Please! You know I don't really care about shit like this, but Graham and the kids gotta live here. What's the big deal? It's just a kiss, and it'll stop them from talking. People already know you and Graham don't like each other, and EVERYONE likes Graham."

"Yeah, yeah, I know," she grumbles. "He's the fucking minister. Halleluleh taking'em all to god. So now it's a fucking sin not to like him? Makes him and his family look bad? That's ridiculous, Merrill!"

Merrill just shrugs helplessly, knowing how small towns can be. "Fine," she says again, "but I'm NOT paying a cent of MY money to kiss him. Gimme a dollar."

"You mean two, don't you? Everyone kisses him twice."

"Merrill .....," she warns, not about to kiss a minister twice, especially THIS minister.

"OK, OK. Here's a dollar," he quickly says, praying that no one notices.

Graham doesn't even see her step into line. He's zoned out now, his lips on automatic pilot with a frozen smile on his face. A daydream has just started, thinking about that year with Colleen and how happy it made him, when he notices suddenly that Star is standing before him with a scowl on her face. A bucket of cold water thrown on him would have had the same effect.

Very quietly she tells him, "Merrill says there's people talking that I haven't kissed you. Wouldn't want to ruin your reputation, so here's a fucking dollar. Pucker up, Rev."

All eyes are on them, everyone seeing the beautiful city woman, who has been rumored not to like their good minister, and who has now only placed ONE dollar to kiss him for charity; definitely a sign of disharmony in the Hess family. Graham wants very badly to refuse this kiss, something deep down telling him that it's going to change everything if he kisses her, but he can see everyone watching them, and feeling a sudden warmth gripping him that he can't push back, he takes a deep breath and leans forward, staring into those cool green eyes of hers.

Star has been thinking about all the kisses she's seen so far at this booth; women closing their eyes dreamily, moving slowly as though trying to prolong the moment, and she has decided it's high time to REALLY give these country folks something to watch. She grabs his face hard with her hands, roughly pulling it to hers, and eyes open locks her lips firmly onto his, instantly opening her mouth.

In automatic response, Graham opens his own mouth, feeling with heated shock her tongue dart between his lips. His eyes are wide, and, at first, he tries to pull back almost half-heartedly, but her hold is strong, and he immediately gives in to the desire building in him. His own tongue, without consciously meaning to, quickly seeks out hers now, making Star's own eyes widen in surprise, as she feels that same heated shock as their tongues flicker against each other and their lips meld together perfectly.

Graham has never kissed anyone, not even Colleen, like this in public before, but he can't stop himself, his arousal is on full steam ahead now, and his face is leaning hungrily into hers. Suddenly, Star pulls away with a gasp, and they stare at each other in a daze until the woman behind her speaks up. "Hey, it's my turn."

The entire kiss lasted less than five seconds, but to the country boy and the city woman, it felt endless. With their daze broken now, Star steps aside, mind racing, while the churchwoman plunks down her two dollars and moves herself to get her minister's attention. A quick glance from Graham to Star, who turns her back on him in response, and he kisses the woman like expected, noticing ruefully that his rock-hard erection has disappeared.


CHAPTER 7

Not long after the strange kiss with Star, the line has emptied, all the county women happy they finally received their yearly kisses with the sexiest man in their lives, and Graham decides it's time to flee into the church to

think clearly. - It was almost like kissing Colleen that first time! That bright spark I felt with her ... knew she was the one. But THIS was FIRE, almost like burning! - And he rubs his lips, not quite sure if he likes it or not. - Does Merrill feel this when he kisses her? How can I ask him without looking like an idiot? God help me, why do I WANT to ask him? I don't! She deliberately tried to embarrass me! She's trouble and needs to go home! -

- What the fuck was that? - Star is thinking in shock like Graham, as she walks with Merrill through the fairgrounds. - I've kissed Gaia I don't know how many guys before, and never felt my lips burn like that. And what kind of a minister doesn't keep his tongue to himself?! I may have stuck mine in there to rattle him, but HE touched it! Son of a bitch! If he had just kept his stupid mouth closed like he did with all those stupid bitches, it never would have happened! -

People are still talking about the kiss, and Merrill saw it too, of course, but knowing that Star was just screwing around like she always does, Merrill just can't bring himself to be too upset about it personally, although he IS worried about possible backlash against his brother from it. They decide to take their time and walk home, neither really wanting to be around Graham right now, and by the time they walk up the driveway, they are hot and sweaty from the summer sun and head right over to the pool out back.

Diving in fully clothed to cool off, Star soon realizes that it's not enough. She just HAS to get that burning feel of Graham out of her mouth, that, to her horror, it's been making her hot and horny, and now she needs Merrill to take care of it. Soon they have pulled off their clothes, and quickly losing track of time, they go at it on the pool deck with Star riding him in relief, as he lays back and happily plays with her breasts.

They are so involved with their pleasure they don't even hear the car pull up to the front of the house. "DAD!" Morgan cries from his room, and Graham runs to his son's bedroom window.

Below is a sight he had hoped never to see; Star bucking wildly on Merrill, her hands on her breasts pulling her nipples while Merrill's hands run all over her naked body. "LORD! GET OUT!" he yells at the kids and shoves them into the hallway. He wants to run out to the pool and scream at them to stop. - How can they do this in broad daylight? Colleen and I always waited until after dark and only in our bedroom. Anywhere else is inappropriate! -

Graham does not like to remember that first year of marriage when Colleen often did try to get him to open up and try different things, as Graham was always able to resist her quiet efforts. Eventually, Colleen gave up and contented herself with her husband's deep love for her, shown also in his very earnest and often passionate lovemaking in their marriage bed at night. She and her husband may have both been virgins until their wedding night, but in the sanctity of his home, Graham quickly became a very good, if not entirely comfortable with experimenting, lover. His wife was rarely left unsatisfied.

He turns to leave the room and have it out with Star and Merrill once and for all when he hears a noise near the window. A photo album has fallen from its shelf. It's an album of Colleen and Morgan that his son had put together, all on his own, after his mother had died. Graham can even remember how important it was to Morgan at the time, insisting that it needed to be done soon, that Bo had said it was something Mommy really wanted done for a special reason. But when Morgan completed it, only last month, he had placed it on that shelf by the window, and Graham has not once seen either of his children look at it since. And now that album is lying open on the window seat, showing a beautiful picture of Colleen to his eyes.

Graham slowly crosses the room, trying not to look out the window again, but when he lifts the album to put it back on the shelf, his eyes immediately fall onto Star. Her skin is shining in the sun, and Merrill's mouth is opening and closing, hands clutching to her breasts again as he approaches orgasm. With the window closed, Graham can't hear them, and nothing on God's green earth could make him open it. Unfortunately, God is not giving him the strength to pull his eyes away now that he is alone in the room. The sight of those small round buttocks of hers moving much slower now on Merrill, her hands in her hair, lifting the long tresses up high and then dropping them back down over her shoulders. It's a sight so appalling and yet so beautiful that he no longer knows what to do.

Star is feeling strange, herself, as though someone is watching her, and she reaches her arms up to the sun to see a beautiful red cardinal fly over towards the house. Her eyes follow the bird, and she suddenly sees Graham staring at her from the upstairs window. - Not shocked. He almost looks like he's ... enjoying it? -

With their eyes holding now, her first urge is to swear at him and jump into the pool to cover herself, and her second urge is to simply smile, remembering that intense kiss they shared. But, it is that third urge she listens to, the urge that often gets her in trouble and admittedly brings her the most fun too. She smiles at him ... and winks, quite enjoying the look of shock that comes over his face as he moves away from the window. - Good thing I don't really believe in hell, - she laughs in her mind. - Purposely teasing a minister, my lover's brother! Gaia, he was asking for it, though! -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ten minutes later they walk into the house, and Graham confronts them, speaking and looking only at Merrill, "How could you? In broad daylight? The kids saw it!"

"Oh my God! I'm sorry, Graham!" Merrill cries in shame.

"Ya know, Rev," Star bites at her lip, feeling very bad too, although not about to admit it out loud to this man. "It wouldn't have happened if you'd just let us share a bedroom."

"I give up!" he turns to glare at her. "Your stuff stays separate. Let the kids think you're still in separate rooms." And he stalks away from the whopper of a sin he has just allowed entrance into his home. If Father Hess had known how many more sins he was about to allow entry into his life, he probably would have moved his moral ass right into the safety of his church.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After dinner, with Merrill gone to work, Star spends the evening on her PC in the living room while occasionally glancing out the window to watch Graham chop wood in the sunset. It's still very warm outside, and he's taken his shirt off to finish the chore. - Nice, - she thinks, really seeing him for the first time since that morning she woke up in his bed by accident. - He's even more cut than Merrill, and Merrill's a ball player. Rev must get alota country workouts to get hard muscles like that. -

Not much later, when the kids have gone up to bed, Graham behind them as usual to do prayers, she has just walked out of the shower with a robe on when she hears Bo call out, "Star?"

Popping her head into their bedroom, she sees the three of them kneeling together, and Graham immediately looks up, not at all happy that she would intrude on their nightly ritual. Bo, however, happily jumps from the floor and grabs a piece of paper to hand it to Star. "I drew this for you. It's the full moon, and I made a shooting star fly by it. Every time I close my eyes and think of you, I see this in my head."

"Th ... thank you," Star stammers out, feeling a funny feeling in her stomach at remembering the two shooting stars she's seen since arriving here only days earlier.

"Aren't you going to say prayers with us?" Bo asks now.

"Oh, I don't ... ," she starts to say, but looking at the children staring at her hopefully, she quickly changes her mind. "Sure, why not?" And she kneels down next to Graham, who stares at her in surprise, but swiftly recovers to start over again.

Not about to actually say anything along with them, Star simply lowers her head a little and watches, winking with affection when she notices that the kids are grinning at her. She almost laughs out loud, though, when they wink in return, thoroughly enjoying each other's presence in the room. Looking over at Graham, she sees that he keeps his eyes closed during bedtime prayers, but when he feels her eyes on him, he opens them, and Star immediately lowers hers in response.

- Good, - he thinks. - Finally showing a real sign of respect. - It was not a sign of respect for his beliefs, or even for him, however, it was more of a sign of respect for his role as parent and teacher to his children, something any good person would show.

Prayers finished, Bo climbs into her bed. "Mommy told me to say 'hi' to you for her, Star."

- Huh? - she looks up quickly at Graham, mouth forming 'what?', but Graham's head begins shaking in such a way that Star can see that he's asking her to humor his daughter. "That's nice, Bo. When you talk to her again, please tell her I said 'hi' too."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With nothing more to do that night, she waits up for Merrill, who comes home early, and they quickly decide to 'christian' his bedroom for sex. - Maybe Rev will hear us, - she thinks with a grin. And just to be sure he does, Star spends that first night making Merrill cry like a baby with all the things she does to him, both feeling very grateful, though, that the kid's room is at the furthest end of the hallway away from them.

Graham tosses and turns most of the night, fully hearing them in the next room. He is desperately trying not to think about the erotic images of her by the pool, the feel of her lips on his at the fair, - and, God help me, I'll never forget, her breast in my mouth! - Eventually, he falls asleep to dream of walking in a very special grove he shared with Colleen; their place to be alone at times. It is beautiful; green grass, a cold stream, and Graham is so happy again, holding his wife's hand, wanting to kiss her under the trees, when he swings her around to him and sees .. red hair ..

"Good Lord!" he gasps, waking up with that distinct throbbing in his groin again.

"Fuck!" Star gasps, waking up at the same time from the same dream with a knowing wetness between her legs.

"What's the matter, Star?" Merrill mumbles in half-sleep.

"Nothing, nothing, go back to sleep. Just remembered something I need to do on the computer. I'll be back in a bit." And she grabs a robe and hurries downstairs with her cell phone in hand while Merrill easily falls back to sleep.

"Mariah!" she hisses into the phone. "I need to talk to you right now!" And she quickly tells her best friend everything; all the dreams of babies, scary cornfields and big country houses, all starting the day she met Merrill. "But the worse thing happened! I dreamed about the Reverend!"

"Have you dreamed about Merrill specifically yet?" Mariah asks.

"No, not yet. But I don't normally dream about guys, ya know. Guess I get enough of them in real life."

"When did you specifically start dreaming about the Reverend? What could have brought it on, Star?"

"Right now, just woke up from it. I... I kissed him at the country fair. He had a kissing booth for charity."

Mariah is now starting to experience her own funny stomach feeling. "Go on, Star. Tell me about the kiss at the fair." And Star does, completely and honestly telling her exactly how a single kiss made her feel and is still making her feel.

"What's his name?"

"Who? Merrill?"

"No, his brother. The minister you kissed."

"It's Graham."

- Holy Gaia! - Mariah thinks in shock. - It HAS to be! Should I tell Star? No, better not. May not work out to their proper destiny if she knows. She's already said how much she dislikes the man. This would give her even more reason to if she thinks that they're being guided. Star is stubborn, very independent. She'll just end up fighting it. Have to let it happen on it's own. If it's truly supposed to, it will. -

"What's going on, Mariah?" Star asks, sensing the woman's discomfort. "I need advice. You know you're the only person I trust. Bringing me into the group was the best thing that's ever happened to me. And now, for the first time in months, I feel lost again. All these weird things happening, like signs. But I don't understand what they mean."

"Star, answer me one question, honestly, without thinking about it. Just answer it. OK?"

"I'm always honest with you."

"Do you want to jump Graham?"

"Oh yeah, I want Graham," she answers immediately. - Oh Gaia! I can't believe I said that! -

"Well, then what's stopping you? Do it. Maybe the strange dreams will stop."

"I can't fuck him! He's Merrill's brother!" - Who am I kidding? That has nothing to do with it. -

"So what. When have you EVER not taken what you wanted, Star?"

"Never. I see a man I want, I take him."

"Sounds to me like you're holding back because he's a minister too."

"He's a fucking prude! Boring! Nothing in common!"

"Star, I'm not saying you should marry the man. Just do what your body wants. Listen to it. Take him."

"I don't know, Mariah, but thanks for listening. Talk to ya later." And she walks into the kitchen past the dark corner where Graham has been hiding. - Star liked the kiss? Wants to have relations with me? Well, it's NOT going to happen! She's an evil little temptress! Not breaking ME down! That beautiful face may fool Merrill, but not me! Don't understand how she could have dreamed about the grove, though? Wonder if Merrill showed her my spot? Has to be it. Just coincidence we dreamed about it on the same night. -

And carefully peering into the kitchen, he sees Star warm up a glass of milk and pull from her pocket a plastic bag of herbs to mix with it. - Just like Colleen used to do when she couldn't sleep, - he thinks, remembering that first time he asked his wife about it and she had told him that she liked to buy different herbs in the city when she was visiting friends .....


CHAPTER 8

The next morning, Star, having spent most of the night thinking about what Mariah said, decides that although it is definitely fun to tease the minister, she won't actually sleep with him. She likes Merrill too much to hurt him in that way, no matter how used to taking what she wants she is, plus, although she can admit to herself that Graham is extremely attractive, she simply can't imagine letting a man of the cloth touch her ... not after the years she spent with her uncle.

Being that it is Sunday morning now, the family hurries to get ready for church. "Do you want to stay here or have us drop you off in town, Star?" Merrill asks.

"You're going to church too?" she asks him in front of Graham.

"Ahhhh yeah," he looks down at the floor, saying quietly, "I always do when I'm home."

"I see," she rolls her eyes. "So it's OK that you didn't go even once in the city?"

"Please Star," he tries to say, seeing at how Graham is staring at him in disappointment.

"Whatever," she shrugs. "I'll go to church too."

A coughing fit suddenly wracks Graham, and Star stares at him until he stops. "You have a problem, Rev?"

"Of course not, all lost souls are welcome," he mumbles while thinking half-seriously, - If she really IS a devil worshipper, maybe she'll explode when she walks on hallowed ground! -

The kids begin to climb into the car, and Graham wants very badly to insist that Star change her clothes, but she can see the disapproving way he's looking at her and quickly snaps in his face, "Don't even think it, Rev. I'm NOT changing."

"Didn't think you were capable of it," he retorts smoothly and climbs into the driver's seat.

"Uncle Merrill," Bo cries. "Sit in back with us, please!"

"Sure thing," he smiles and leaves Star to reluctantly sit in front with Graham, who is beginning to think he should have asked Merrill to drive instead.

- Oh well, may as well start the fun, - she thinks and deliberately sits in a way that her already too short mini-skirt rides up almost all the way to her crotch, just barely keeping it from completely exposing her.

Soon, Graham begins to actually sweat as he drives, not able to keep his eyes from watching those thighs slowly opening and closing so near him. - Time for a new view, - and she leans over to tune the radio in, holding very still in order for Graham to see directly down her braless shirt.

The car swerves ..

"Graham?" Merrill speaks up from the back. "You OK? Want me to drive?"

"No, no, just tired," he answers, as he tries harder to concentrate on the road.

Glancing down at his lap, Star sees it now, big as life, his very physical reaction straining against his minister's garments. - This is hysterical! .. Hmmmm... looks bigger than Merrill's. - But when Graham sees where she's looking, he turns red, grabs his jacket and throws it over his lap, deliberately ignoring her soft snorts of laughter at his embarrassment. Traveling much faster than usual, they reach the church in record time, and Graham is the first to jump out of the car, still holding the jacket in front of him.

With a smile, Star steps out and walks around to his side, as Merrill and the kids run through the lot, and when no one but Graham is looking her way, she purposely drops her pocketbook on the ground near him. Just before he has a chance to automatically reach for it, she's bending over directly in front of him. - LORD HELP ME! - he almost cries out loud at seeing that perfect bare ass of hers presenting itself to him.

It's so close he can smell her now. A scent reaching deep inside making him suddenly picture himself taking this wicked woman like an animal, pushing her down on all fours in a way he's read about but never done, a need to copulate so frantically that being in broad daylight in his church parking lot would be the last thing in his heat-driven mind. And this almost all-consuming image is making the throbbing in his groin so severe now that his hand has begun to press firmly against it through the jacket. - Oh God I need relief! I can't lose control at church of all places! -

Star turns around, smiling sweetly at his discomfort, and almost laughs out loud at seeing the obvious glaze over his face as he stares at her. But when their eyes catch for a moment, she sees something new, something profoundly intense, so wild and forceful straining to free itself from the depths of those blue eyes, that it catches her by surprise and makes her own body begin to flush in response.

Her eyes are actually lowering instinctively to such an unexpected show of male strength, but she quickly looks back up angrily, - Shit! No guy makes me feel like this! - to see that Graham has already fled, gone to the safety of his church to begin the service.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Reverend Hess is standing at the pulpit, thankful that it hides his lower body from view, as he tries to speak to the church while desperately picturing bible scenes in an attempt to cleanse his body and mind of the unwanted desire. But when Star sits down in the front pew between the kids, her legs opening slightly with a knowing smile on her face, Graham begins to stammer, and he thoroughly makes a mess of his normally perfect greeting to his congregation. - Dear God, make her go away. Please, I'm just a man. Make her go away. -

God doesn't listen, however, at least not yet, and Star continues to torment one of his own within his place of worship. One small hand runs slowly up her thigh, and every time Graham foolishly looks at her face, she catches his eyes and parts her lips just a little, letting her tongue dart out to lick at them as she tilts her head to show off her long slender neck.

As soon as the service is over, the quickest one the town has ever heard, although, to Graham, the longest ever, he completely caves, and rather than immediately walking out front like usual, he runs into the bathroom and does something that he hasn't done since before he was married. It is a 'something' a horrified pubescent Graham once confessed to his father, who quickly assured his growing son that the 'something' was quite normal and that God certainly understood that occasionally it just needed to be done, in private.

When he eventually comes out to the front steps like normal, the church ladies begin clucking over him, worried that their good minister has become sick, but Star throws him a grin from his hand to his crotch, and Graham flushes full of only anger now and turns himself away from her.

- Cool. Got the man to whack off in his own church. That's a new one for me. -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back at home later that night, she overhears Merrill and Graham arguing about her. "I don't want her here anymore. Tell her to go home or I will. She's a bad influence on my kids." - And ME! Pleasuring myself in church! How could I let myself fall that far? -

"That's ridiculous, Graham," Merrill immediately defends her. "The kids love her! You know that! She's only been here a week, and they're crazy about her!"

"Well I'm NOT! She's a harlot, Merrill! How can you be serious about someone like that?! She dates other men, dresses like a whore, smokes, drinks, and does God knows what else!"

"If she leaves, so do I," Merrill says quietly but very firmly.

"You can't be serious," Graham cries in shock. "You'd choose her over your family?"

"You're forcing me to. I won't be the one to lose the kids over it, but YOU will if you make us leave."

"They'll get over it," Graham is quick to respond to the threat, although he can't help but wonder if they really will after losing their mother so recently.

"Sure, they might get over Star ... eventually, but not over me, Graham. Not if I leave under these kind of circumstances."

"That .... WOMAN is going to take you to hell, Merrill. There's something wrong with her. She's too different! Can't you SEE it?" he pleads with his brother, desperate to make him understand the danger he's sensing from her presence in their lives.

"Graham," Merrill shakes his head sadly, as he walks away. "I'm beginning to think Star's right. You really ARE a fanatic."

"Sorry Rev," Star sneaks up quietly behind Graham. "Your little brother belongs to me. Care to join him?"

"I'll see you in hell first," he whirls on her snarling, as he slams the door and she yells back, "Good! We'll have a fucking party when you get there!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few more days go by, and Graham continues to watch Star closely for even the slightest hint of danger to his family. Star, for her part, though, has begun to change her mind about the constant teasing. It may have been fun at first, but it's beginning to make her feel strangely at times, an odd feeling that she's never experienced before, and she's not sure just how to handle it.

Graham, noticing that she has let up on him and how she so often plays well with the kids and helps around the house, although, admittedly, still has a lot to learn in the kitchen, is beginning to feel a little better about having her around. - Perhaps I was being irrational. Too much stress lately since Colleen. I certainly haven't been in the best frame of mind to see things clearly like I usually do. -

And back on fairly even ground again, Star's cell rings one morning while Merrill is in the shower and the kids are outside. Rather than the professional business conversation Graham usually hears from her, she immediately walks out of the kitchen and into the next room to start swearing at the person. "No! I told you! We're over! If you don't stop, I'll quit!" she eventually threatens and hangs up.

"Your boss?" Graham asks, coming up behind her. "Sorry, you were kind of loud."

"Yeah, the fucking prick thinks because I dated him for a while he can still talk to me like that. Trying to scare me now. Even tried threatening to cut Merrill from the team. But I won't let him. Sue his ass if he tries."

"That's good," Graham nods. "At least we agree on ONE thing."

"Yeah? What's that? Didn't think we agreed on ANYTHING."

"Merrill," he answers with a smile. "I love him like you do. Don't want him ever hurt."

"Ahhh gee, Rev," she snorts. "I don't want the guy hurt either, but I never said I loved him."

The face rubbing starts, trying to comprehend yet another shock that he knows shouldn't have surprised him by now. "I know you still date other men, but you're sleeping with my brother, yet you don't actually love him .. even a little?"

"Yeah, that just about sums it up," her arms fold over her chest, ready for a 'fight'. "Got a problem with that?"

"No," he says very quietly, as he turns back to the kitchen. "But I have a feeling you do."

- What the fuck he mean by that? -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later that same morning .. "I don't want to do it, Merrill. It doesn't feel right. It's too soon."

"Fine, Graham. But if you're not doing it this year, then I'm not either."

"Merrill, please. You always bring in close to a hundred dollars for the church. They need you."

"I know I do, but YOU bring in twice as much. They're going to be real upset if you bow out this year. And I honestly don't see why you should, Graham. Colleen never had a problem with you doing it, did she?"

"No, she was wonderful about that," Graham is forced to agree. "She was wonderful about everything .... Fine, I'll do it."

"Do what?" Star barges into the room, only having caught the tail end of the conversation.

"Graham and I and some of the other men in the area go up on auction for a date with the highest bidder tomorrow night. Doesn't matter if anyone's married or not. It's just for fun, and it brings money to the church."

"Well now, Merrill," she smiles teasingly. "I didn't give you permission to sell your body."

"Just make sure you win, Star," he smiles back. "I don't want to spend an evening with anyone but you. Probably cost you about a hundred dollars, though."

"No problem. So what about you, Rev? You bring in half that?"

- Half? - Graham is suddenly feeling the sin of pride, very tempted to tell this particular woman that he always brings in more than the other men, but, of course, his sincere humility simply won't let him.

"I don't know what it is about him," Merrill laughs when Graham doesn't respond. "But the women always shell out a lot more for a date with the town minister."

"I'm surprised," Star smirks. "Can't imagine what kind of a date you bring them on . praying at the church, maybe some square dancing in the park, and round it out with a nice quilting bee to keep their horny little hands busy?"

"Maybe if you bid on me, you'll find out," his eyes narrow and he blurts out impulsively.


CHAPTER 9

For once, Graham has actually surprised Star with his suggestion to bid on him, but she laughs nervously and quickly pulls Merrill away, as the younger brother begins to wonder to himself if Graham has finally gone and developed a warped sense of humor to help deal with the tremendous loss in his life.

Later that same day .. "Damnit!" Merrill yells when he slams down the kitchen phone.

"Merrill ... ," Graham warns at the profanity. He may have gotten used to it with Star around him, but he is NOT about to tolerate it from his brother who has always respected the house rules in the past.

"Sorry, but shit," he grunts. "I have to go to the city for Stan. He's really sick, and I'm the only one who can do it for him. Not a big deal, but I'll be gone a couple days."

"Can you bring Star with you?" - Dear God, don't let me be alone with her that long! -

"Sure, she'll be bored out of her mind if she hangs with me at the head office while I'm talking fuel costs, but I'll ask her."

Star has no desire to leave the country right now, however. She is more than a little worried of running into Tony after that intense telephone conversation they just had, although she is not up to talking about it with Merrill and decides a flimsy excuse will have to do instead. "I really don't want to go back yet, Merrill. Too many people around I know. I'll just get caught up in team business and stuck there."

Graham, seeing her glance at her cell phone on the table, has guessed why she is reluctant. "It's fine, Star. You can stay here. I'm sure you'll find something to keep yourself occupied until Merrill comes back."

- Weird, can't believe he isn't eager to get rid of me? - she thinks while nodding her head slowly in thanks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning Merrill is kissed at the bus station, as he teases with her to behave while he's gone. - No problem. Teasing and doing are two different things, especially where your strange brother is concerned. But ya know something, my dear sweet boy, if he wasn't a minister, I probably would have jumped him that first day .... brother or not. -

As the day progresses, the sun turns hot, and she and the kids jump into the pool while Graham walks around the yard taking care of chores and watches them splash around and have fun. Star, wearing a very skimpy black bikini, is trying her best to ignore Graham, who has taken off his shirt to chop more wood for winter. The kids, wanting to play with their father, begin splashing him, and Graham, playing along, yells good-naturedly, "Knock it off! Already had a bath today!"

"Why don't ya come in, Rev?" Star grins at him. "Can't be a sin to swim if you have a pool."

"I'm fine," he grunts, good mood instantly vanished and turns back to the woodpile. - Stop looking at her! -

"Mmmm the water's great. You're just a big chicken," she laughs at him.

"Have nothing to fear," he says quietly, staring at the wood, all motion stopped.
"Really? Then why are ya sweating in the sun while we're all nice and cool in here?"

The kids have stopped splashing and are watching the exchange closely. Graham slowly turns back towards Star, sees his kid's expectant faces, and suddenly grins, runs, and dives into the pool with his jeans on, coming right up out of the water to stand in front of Star.

"Told you," he says, wiping water from his smiling face. "Nothing to fear."

She smiles in return and slips into the water, as he yelps in surprise at feeling hands spread his legs apart to swim through them. "Chlorine's gonna ruin those jeans," she says over his shoulder. "You might wanna take them off." And she laughs, swimming back over to the kids.

Eventually, the four of them end up playing pool games like Morgan sitting on Graham's shoulders and Bo sitting on Star's to toss balls back and forth, and when the kids become bored with that, they move onto underwater tag. When Graham's turn comes to be 'it', however, he grabs Star's foot so quickly and firmly under the water that she jumps in fright, her mind flashing onto her nightmare about the monster. Pulling away from him in a blind panic, her head hits hard on the stairs, and she knocks herself out.

"She's not breathing!" Graham shouts as he lays her out on the deck and begins performing CPR. "Morgan, call the doctor!" Star suddenly gasps, choking out water, and screams in fear of the nightmare image still racing through her mind. Before Graham can calm her, she's fallen right back into the water, her arms thrashing wildly, as her screams begin to reach fever pitch.

SPLASH! Graham has jumped back in and is struggling to lift her out of the water. - Lord, she's going to drown us both! - But when Star's panicked eyes spot that beautiful red Cardinal flying over again, she focuses clearer on Graham, and her arms wrap around his neck in relief.

"I've got you," he murmurs into her ear, as he holds her tight to him and her trembling slowly subsides.

"Graham!" they hear a man calling and both look over to see his family doctor run up to the pool. Another reason Graham loves living in the country; some doctors are still willing to make house calls.

"I'm OK," she mutters and pushes out of his arms.

"That's up to me to say, young lady," the doctor answers. "Come into the house and I'll check you out." The kids and Graham are worriedly looking at her, so, with an exasperated sigh, she climbs out of the pool to follow him into the living room, where everyone proceeds to watch until she has been pronounced well enough to stay home.

Graham is walking the doctor out, and Star can hear him speaking with a noticeable crack in his voice. "It happened so fast ... she wasn't breathing .."

"You saved her life. It will be something to tell your kids some day."

"Excuse me?" Graham's eyes widen.

"Your kids. Aren't you and her? I saw you holding her ...."

"Ohhh, no, we're not," Graham quickly explains, remembering that his doctor isn't a member of his church and has been out of town at a seminar. "She's Merrill's girlfriend, staying with us for a while."

"Oh, I see," the doctor replies with a look that really says, 'no, I don't see.'

"Is there anything at all I can do for her?" Graham asks, purposely ignoring the look. "I ... I just want to be sure she's OK."

"Not really, Graham. She's very healthy from what I can see. Might try to get her to go to bed early tonight, get some rest after a scare like that."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Well, good news, kids," he tells Bo and Morgan after the doctor has left. "No yucky babysitter tonight. I'm staying home."

"But Dad," Morgan says. "Bo said you have to go to the auction."

"No," he looks over at Star. "I think we should have a nice quiet night tonight."

"Daddy, you don't understand," Bo tries to explain. "It's very, very, very, very important that you go."

"Honey," he kneels down to face her. "I swear, the church will survive this one year if I don't go."

"It's not the church, Daddy. It's ... it's ..," and she glances at Star and whispers in his ear.

A whisper that brings a frown to Graham's face. "Sweetie, you're just dreaming of Mommy. It isn't real."

"Please Daddy!" she starts to cry now. "You HAVE to go! Please!"

"Hey," Star interrupts. "Don't stay home on MY account. I was thinking of going into town, myself. Check out that 'happening' soda shop you got going here. See what the locals are doing while you're busy selling your body for your pimp god." - Yeah I know, he saved my life, but he's still a pain in my Christian-hating ass. -

"Fine, we'll go," he stands back up, glaring at Star. - Not surprised. Woman like her isn't capable of gratitude. -

"Good," she stands and walks by him. "Wouldn't want you to disappoint your fan club."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Upstairs for the rest of the day, Star lies around reading and thinking, thinking about how he saved her in the pool and why it happened. He knocks on her door for dinner. "Star, it's ready if you want to join us."

She doesn't answer him; she's sitting at the window staring out at the cornfield and lost in her thoughts. Graham knocks again and opens the door, seeing her back to him. Silently, he walks over to look at where she is staring. "I don't know why," she says quietly now, sensing his presence behind her. "I've been having nightmares for weeks about it. Something .... something horrible taking me away, you and Merrill trying to save me. Something in the cornfield."

"There's nothing in there," he leans down by the side of her face. "Just corn."

"Maybe," she answers and slowly turns to face him. "Thanks for .... you know."

Nodding seriously, although in surprise, he stands up straight and heads back downstairs. After dinner, the kids are left with the sitter, and they drive into town in not quite, but almost comfortable, silence. At Star's insistence, not about to hang around a church, he drops her off in the middle of town and heads alone to the auction.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As Graham is the biggest sale every year, he always goes up last on the block, and just as Star walks in an hour later, very bored now and hoping that the event is over so they can go home, he is standing on the stage under the bright lights waiting for the bidding to end.

She immediately sees him up front and center, taking closer note of his nice red cotton short-sleeved t-shirt, blue jeans and tan colored work boots. The shirt highlights his dark hair and outlines the muscles over his chest and arms, as Graham has been working out around the house more recently and could probably use a larger size shirt. The blue in his jeans is new, matching his eyes beautifully, and, with the shirt tucked in with a belt, his tapered waist and full seat are fully shown off to their best advantage. Naturally, Graham had only picked neat but casual clothing he normally wears outside of work, having no idea at how incredibly sexy he looks in a well-fitting t-shirt and pair of jeans. If this man knew that his perfectly sculpted ass attracted women like bees to honey, he'd have worn the longest, largest shirt he could have found.

Women are in a frenzy bidding on him, pulling out their wallets, opening checkbooks and begging money from their husbands and boyfriends. The lucky winner's man is going to get one very grateful lay tonight. The frenzy hasn't escaped Graham's notice, and he realizes that it's become even wilder than it was last year, probably because of his new status as being single again. Of course, it bothers him. - They're making more out of it than they should! Lord God, I'd forgotten how it was before I married Colleen! It'll be like this every year unless I marry again! -

The bidding has just reached $300, more than he's ever brought in before. "Six-hundred!" Star calls out, automatically doubling it. -There! That'll end this stupid farce so I can go home and do some work! -

Everyone turns to stare at her, and Graham's mouth opens in shock. - NOT HER! Someone outbid her! Dear God make someone outbid her! - Unfortunately for Graham, as much as others want to go out with him, no one can top $600 for a date in this small town, not even with the most attractive and most eligible bachelor for many miles around.

When the auctioneer's hammer goes down, signifying the end of the sale, Star asks loudly with a wide grin, "So, Rev, who do I make this check out to? God? God Jr.? The Holy Spook?"

Before he can respond, his face cracking from the forced smile, the head church lady runs up to Star. "Make it out to Episcopal Church, dear."

Slapped into the woman's hand, the check lands, as Star smiles nicely and explains, "Threw in some extra for your lovely lady's group," and turns to Graham, "Now get your butt off that stage, Rev, so we can go home."

The church lady, smiling at Star's departing back, looks at the check now and almost drops it at seeing the amount it was made out to .... $666 ..... the number of the beast.


CHAPTER 10

A loud gasp, and she runs the 'evil' check over to Graham, who looks at it for a moment, his face darkening with anger, and then out the door he flies to find Star. "That wasn't funny," he says in a very low voice, his hands clenching at his sides at seeing her casually standing by his car, tapping her foot at him impatiently.

"What?" she asks, quickly turning to hop in the car at feeling a slight tremor of apprehension run through her. - I've seen him angry, but not like this! Guess the man has a limit after all. -

"You know," he answers, as he slides behind the wheel and moves closer to her, closer and closer. "Making the check out like that. Are you deliberately trying to embarrass my family?"

"Fuck no, Rev," she laughs a little nervously, as she scoots away from him. "I was just joking around ... Sorry. Couldn't resist." - Did I just say 'sorry'?! -

"I see. And is that why you .. bought me?" he asks, feeling a bit calmer at her apology and turning to start the car. "Joking around?"

"Nope. Just bought your ass to get the hell outta this boring shit town. The way those bitches were fighting over you was pathetic. Doesn't anyone get laid around here?"

Once more, he finds himself rubbing his face, as he stares at the road. "Contrary to what you think, there is a lot of fun things to do in the country."

"Whatever," she shrugs. "Don't worry, Rev. You don't have to think of anything to do with me. I'm not going out with you." - Not if you were the last man on Mother Earth! -

"Good," he says quite firmly. - I wouldn't take you out for a million dollars for the church! -

"Excuse me?" her eyes widen.

"You heard me. I said 'good'. I wasn't going to take you out anyways."

"Why the fuck not?" she shouts indignantly. "Aren't I good enough for ya? My money not good enough? Or am I just too fucking much woman for ya? Is that it, Rev? Ya scared to take me out?"

"Merrill," he says the one word very quietly, assuming it will end the conversation.

Yeah right. Not fucking likely.

"Fuck Merrill!" she snaps. "He won't be home for days. I bought your ass, and I wanna date now! You're taking me out, Rev, or I'll raise holy hell in this town. You think they're talking about me now? You'll wish you had never met me when I'm done here."

SCREETCHHHHH!!! Graham slams the car brakes on, and for the first time ever, Star sees much more than just anger in his eyes. They've gone cold ... cold and deadly in a way no one with an ounce of self-preservation would ever want to see again. "I'll take you out, you little witch, but don't you EVER threaten me or mine again."

- Gaia! I wanna scratch those fucking eyes out! - But that look in his eyes is stopping her, and she can feel that strange tremor again, a tremor telling her not to push this particular man any further, to let it go or something even more unexpected might happen if she doesn't. "Good," she huffs instead. "You better be worth the money I spent."

His mouth moves, trying to hold back something, but then a small smile is cracked. "I think you'll be pleasantly surprised."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back at the house, Graham overhears his kids talking in the bathroom while they brush their teeth. "I think it's working," Bo giggles.

"What's working?" he asks, as he walks into the room.

"Nothing," she smiles; a smile that any good parent would know means that their child is hiding something. - Well, that's fine, - he thinks. - Even kids need their secrets sometimes. If it's something important, Morgan is old enough to know to tell me or at least Merrill. -

Late into the night, Graham sits bolt upright in bed at hearing Star moan in the next room. "Noooo help me, nooooo. Graham, help me please."

Without even a thought first to throw a robe over his boxers or knock on her door, he rushes to her bedside. Completely nude, Star is laying on the bed moaning, her legs kicking at the blankets, as her hands clench and unclench to the bed sheet. "Graham ....noooo, please help me, Graham ....."

Thinking only of his worry for her, he sits close on the bed and gently shakes her. "Star, wake up."

"No no no no noooooo," her head turns side to side in the throes of the nightmare.

"Star! I'm here! Wake up!" he leans even closer to her, his hands gripping her shoulders.

Green eyes fly open, as she sits up into him. "GRAHAM!" And seeing him close to her now, his startled but worried eyes, she cries, "Oh Gaia! Please help me!"

Whether Gaia or God is involved doesn't matter, Graham simply does what comes natural to him with this woman. His arm open for her, and she, in turn, does what comes natural to her; clutches tightly to the one man who can give her comfort. But when her breathing has returned to normal, he stops stroking her back and forces himself to pull away, afraid to prolong such a close contact any longer than necessary when he knows he can no longer fully trust himself around her.

"Stay until I fall asleep?" she looks up at him pleadingly, tears in her eyes. "Please, Graham?" And he nods, not able to refuse her anything in her distress. With a sigh of relief, her hands release his arms and she curls up on her side to face him, not even once considering her bare body in her fear and now gratitude that the man is willing to stay and help her keep hold of her sanity.

Looking only at her frightened face, worry overriding any desire to look elsewhere, he stands up for a moment, still forgetting his own near nudity, pulls the blankets over her, and then sits back on the bed to silently wait for her to fall asleep. In time, Graham finds his own eyes growing heavy, and his head falls against the headboard, sliding down onto Merrill's pillow until he is fast asleep also.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Star?" he wakes in the morning to the feel of his face in her chest again and her arms around him.

"Yeah Rev?" she gasps, trying hard to ignore that large heat of his pressing through thin cotton boxers against her legs.

"This was an accident," he states into her breasts, struggling to keep his face very still and refuse the enticing scent calling to him. "I fell asleep. After you had the nightmare. Please say you remember."

"Yeah, I remember. Just get outta my tits before I smack ya."

And faster than she can say 'Now Rev' he's out of the room, not once letting his eyes fall on her again, as he rushes out the door and runs right into his smiling kids in the hallway. "G .. good morning," he stammers before slamming his door and throwing himself onto the bed.

Minutes later, when he's sure that they've both gone downstairs, he grabs his robe and flees to the shower, a very cold shower.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the night she just had, Star decides to skip breakfast that morning, and, eventually, Graham comes up looking for her. "You hardly ever eat. I made those biscuits you like." And he hands her one, along with a fresh cup of coffee.

"Thanks. I think I'm just gonna hang out here for a while, finish catching up on my reading," she sits back down, not noticing Graham's glance at the 'dream book' laying out on the bedside table.

"Well, I was thinking," Graham says, as he stares at the floor now. "If we're going to do that, you know .... date thing. Today is the perfect day, unless you'd rather wait until Merrill comes back ... Maybe we should wait."

"No. It would be too weird for him. - Not to mention ME! - Let's just forget it now."

"OK," he mumbles, walking out, feeling a strong sense of sadness sweep through him. - For the best, - he's trying to convince himself. - A date with her, no matter how innocent, can only lead to bad things. -

Only minutes later downstairs, changing her mind about reading, Star walks into the kitchen to hear Graham on the phone. "Never mind Lee. Don't need the horses. We're not coming after all. Thanks. Bye."

"Horses?" she asks him.

"Yes. My neighbor has horses. Lets me take them riding. I was going to bring you."

"I ... I loved horses when I was young. Parents took me riding once ... just ... just before they were killed."

"Would you like to go?" he asks with a hint of hopefulness. - Please don't make me regret this, God. It's just a morning ride. -

Staring out the window for a moment to think about it, she then turns to look him in the eyes and slowly nods. - Gaia, they really ARE stunning. -

A smile comes to Graham's face, and he quickly calls his neighbor back before the woman can change her mind on him. And two hours later, Star is dressed very casually in jeans and a t-shirt and following Graham, who is carrying a large backpack and heading towards the cornfield.

"Wait a minute," she calls to his back. "I thought we'd walk the road or drive over there."

"We can," he agrees, turning around. "But it's a shortcut through here. Beautiful day, Star. Nothing to worry about." And to put her mind at ease as much as he can, he reaches out his hand towards her.

- No thanks. - she squares her shoulders and scorns the hand, walking right past him into the field to prove she can do it.

With a shake of his head and a smile at her stubbornness in wanting to face her fear on her own, he quickly overtakes her and walks smoothly through the field towards his neighbor's property. - Shit! - she suddenly gasps at seeing movement in the corn and instinctively reaches out to Graham for safety. Without asking, her fingers dig down into the back of his jeans, holding tight to his belt, as she steps up as close to him as she can get.

Turning his upper body, slightly surprised at how she's clutching to him now, he quickly assures her, "It was just a crow, I saw it."

The man can make all the assurances he wants. Nothing in the heavens or on earth could make Star let go of him now. And Graham, although not entirely comfortable with how her fingers are reaching down his backside, decides to smile and accept it, proceeding through the field and soon stepping out near his neighbor's barn.

After introductions are made, a saddle is thrown over a large black gelding and a saddle over a smaller brown mare for Star. "I ....I don't think I can actually ride," she admits now. "I've only been on a horse once. Fell off and broke my arm. It was the reason ... the reason .. ," her voice trails off.

"Reason for what?" he asks quietly, sensing it is something very important.

"Nothing. Never mind. But I'm not riding. I'll brush them and watch you."

"You don't have to ride by yourself, Star," he smiles, jumping up on the gelding to reach his arm down to her. "Come on, don't be chicken," he teases her in the way she did to him at the pool.

- I'm NOT chicken! Alone on the mare or with the Rev? Shit! No way I'm riding alone! - And she grasps his arm to let him swing her up behind him. - Not so bad! - she thinks for a very brief moment, before the very next second that her leg actually comes down and she finds herself clutching her arms around his stomach as if for dear life. - If I fall, I'll kill him! -

"Better?" he asks, trying not to smile in amusement at feeling her pressed tight against his back.

"Yeah, just don't go too fast."

"Thought you like fast things," he teases again.

"Is that a joke? 'Cuz if it is, I guess you're human after all, Rev."

A soft laugh, and they head out into a field where he keeps the horse to a slow pace at first, but as soon as he feels hands beginning to relax on his stomach, he spurs the horse on faster until they're moving at a fine trot. The hands immediately grip tight again, but nothing is said, as Star is actually enjoying it now, and soon he has them following a small trail through the woods, heading deeper and deeper into the cool trees

- Wait a minute! - A sudden thought comes to her mind when she finally notices how far they've gone from the farm. - How well do I really know him? Less than two weeks! He could jump me out here! Or, maybe this was just a ruse to leave me lost in the woods! Get rid of me! - But, just before she can say 'let's go back', they've come to the bottom of a tall cliff where a sparkling waterfall is running into a shallow pool of clear water surrounded by lush grass.

It is the most beautiful, serene place Star has ever seen. - Whoa! There's a huge red Cardinal just like the one I keep seeing around the house. Could it be the same bird? A sign? ... of what? -

Jumping down from the horse, Graham holds his arms out to help her, but, as usual, Star refuses help and jumps down herself, instantly falling on her ass, as her legs give out from the ride. Before she can notice, he's swiftly turned around, holding back a laugh. - I could've caught her. She's just got to learn to loosen up. We don't HAVE to be enemies ... Do we? -

"Nice place," she says after a moment of huffing to her feet angrily. - Almost feels like I've been here before. -

"More than nice," Graham agrees. "Perfect. Colleen and I used to come here to get away. Ummm.... I don't suppose Merrill has already shown it to you?" he asks almost hopefully, suddenly remembering the dream they had on the same night.

"Nope, new to me," she grins. "Don't worry, Rev. We haven't desecrated your special spot." - Didn't I dream about it, though? Weird! -

"Thank God for small blessings," he mutters, pushing the thought of them having relations here of all places out of his mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once the horse is tied, and Star has been shown around the glen, Graham sits back to relax and watch her explore on her own. Out comes a small blanket, sketchpad, pencils and food. And not much later, when she's ready to just hang out and enjoy the area with him, she comes back and looks over his shoulder at what he's been doing. "That's really good. You could make money if you moved to the city."

"Colleen used to say that too. But I'm not interested. Staying here. Got everything I need here."

"Don't have a wife," she blurts without thinking, and his head snaps around bitterly.

"Sorry, Graham," she quickly and sincerely apologizes. "Didn't mean it to sound like that." - Two apologies in less than a day? What the fuck is happening to me? -

"It's OK," he nods his head and looks back down at the sketching. "I know what you mean. I'll probably get married again some day .... if that's what God wants for me."

"Yeah you probably will," she laughs. "I bet you can have your pick from all those church ladies."

"Believe it or not," he laughs with her, "some of them are really nice ... but ... I don't think so. I'll know when the right one crosses my path. I knew with Colleen."

"Crosses your path? You gotta go out and look, Rev. Especially in an area like this. What're the chances you're gonna find another love of your life around here? Pretty slim, I'd say. Ya got lucky once. That's more than most people get."

"You're probably right," he agrees gravely. "Is that what you're doing, Star? Looking?"

"Nahhhh, I'm not ready to settle down." - No matter what that stupid dream book says! -

"Oh." - Good! Don't have to worry about her marrying Merrill! He'll find someone that fits in better some day. -"Star, can I ask you something?" he asks after a pause.

"Maybe," she smiles at him.

"What, if anything, do you believe in or worship?" - If she says the Devil, I'm putting her on the next bus! -

"Not god," she answers quietly.

No surprise there.

"I've heard you mention 'Gaia'. Does it mean earth mother or something like that?"

"Yeah, Rev," she sighs and heads over to pet the horse.

Taking it as an obvious cue that she doesn't want to discuss it, he decides to focus on his sketching for a while, scattered thoughts coming to mind of needing to feel Colleen just one more time, of needing to open his heart again some day and hope for another chance at happiness, of needing ... something.

A loud gasp, and he looks up in worry. Star is sitting on the horse. "I did it!" she squeals.

"Hey, what are ya doing?" she asks with a touch of panic, as he starts untying it.

"Just going to lead him around for you. You trust me ... don't you?"

An easy question if she doesn't think about it. And she doesn't; her head nods immediately. "Just don't let go."

"I won't, I promise." And very slowly at first, he proceeds to lead her around the glen, enjoying the sound of her laughter, as she watches him pick up the pace just enough to jog along beside the horse.

When the man has finally had enough in the hot sun, though, he ties the horse back up, watches her dismount without falling this time, and walks over to the cool water to crouch down and splash some of it on his head. Kneeling behind him, Star dips a napkin into the small pool and holds it over the back of his neck, watching with sudden interest at how the drops of moisture seem to linger on his skin, sparkling so strangely at her before running languidly down the curves of his muscles and under his clothes.

"Maybe you should take your shirt off," she murmurs, her mind beginning to wonder just where those fascinating drops of water are running off to and if she can possibly find them again.

"I ... I don't ... I'm fine," he quickly stands up. "Let's eat. Worked up an appetite." - Food! Just need . food! -

Sighing, she sits down on the blanket with him to enjoy the small meal he had carefully packed. And eating in silence now, she eventually turns her attention back onto the horse and begins to speak very quietly, as if to herself. "We were driving home from the hospital. So tired. I'd broken my arm riding. They told me later that

Mom and Dad fell asleep. Dad worked double shifts. He was always tired. My uncle was driving ..." and she suddenly realizes that Graham is staring at her, nodding his head encouragingly. "I've never talked about it with anyone ... ever .... Don't know why I'm telling you of all people," she shrugs awkwardly and looks away again.

Graham is quite afraid to say a single word now, knowing that if he does, it will likely break the spell and she may never open up to someone again. - She needs to talk to someone. That's what a minister does best. Maybe I can help her. Help her heal. -

"My uncle said he fell asleep too," she continues, only willing to look at the horse to finish what she started. "I woke up in the hospital without a single cut, but with two dead parents and an uncle ... an uncle who ... who ....," And tears begin to form in her eyes now, remembering.

Touching her shoulder in sympathy, pushing aside the memory of his own wife's killer having fell asleep at the wheel too, his eyes show Star how much he truly wants to help, help take her pain away. Feeling that warmth of kindness, she turns back to him, sees boundless compassion from a man she has purposely tormented ... and confesses. "I think I've hated you so much because of that collar you wear. My uncle was a minister too. Knew him for years and you less than two weeks."

"What did your uncle do?" Graham asks softly, feeling sure that he knows the answer but also sure that the woman needs to say it out loud to someone in order to work her way past it. It will never be forgotten, but it will be a tremendous first step towards healing.

Although her eyes leave his face, she leans closer to him, pouring out the pain. "Dad's sister, his wife was dead a long time. Dad used to push him to date and get married again, but he always said he liked being a bachelor. I ...I found out why one day living with him after the accident. Found a box filled with so many videos, so many of them homemade. And when he caught me looking, he ... he made me .... made me ...." And the tears begin to fall, unable to stay back after being held in for so very long.

"I'm so sorry, Graham," she cries, as he begins to rub her shoulder soothingly.

"For what? You have nothing to be sorry for." - I just wish I had known you then. Would have kept that man from hurting you. I knew you needed help Star, but I had no idea how much you suffered. -

"For thinking you could be like him, for causing you trouble with your friends .... for ... for ... you know."

"It's OK. Really. I think God brought you here to heal. You needed to talk about this with someone. I'm glad you're here."

"Thanks, me too ... but not god," she says.

"Whatever you believe in then," he says easily. "But you feel a little better now, right?"

"Yeah, I do," she smiles, wipes the tears and impulsively hugs him. "Thank you, Rev."

"You're welcome," he breathes in her ear, as they hold each other. - Oh Lord I want to kiss her! ... NO! It's wrong ... Merrill ... too soon after Colleen .... not right ....Merrill! -

- Mariah said I should take him! Gaia, I want to right now in this beautiful spot! Merrill's a big boy! He can stop seeing me if he wants to. I just .. I just need this man so much now! -

They're gazing in each other's eyes, neither wanting to end the embrace, but there is no way Graham will purposely cross that line with his brother's girlfriend, no way, and Star can feel it. Making her decision to be the one to do the crossing instead, she very firmly presses her lips onto his. Eyes widen, staring at her as she tries to kiss him with her own eyes closed, but no matter how much the man in him wants to desperately make love to the soft woman in his arms, he somehow finds the strength to keep his mouth closed this time and gently push her away. "Please don't," he gasps painfully at shutting down his desire for her.

"Why not?" she asks, thoroughly confused as she looks down at his lap. "You want it too." - Gaia, I wanna ride that! -

"I can't," he shifts position shamefully. "It's not right."

"If it feels good," and she grabs hold of it through his jeans, "then it's right."

Barely suppressing a groan, Graham jumps to his feet. "Let's go home. I'm not discussing this with my brother's girlfriend." - Oh God, she touched me there! Give me strength! -

"You're rejecting ME?" she stands up, starting to feel a sense of womanly fury at the thought.

His back turns on her, saying very firmly, though. "Yes." God may not have given him the strength he asked for, but Graham was able to find what has always been within him.

"You bastard! I fucking bought your ass for almost $700, and you won't even kiss me? No one rejects ME! I reject THEM!"

- Don't look at her! Don't look at her! - he orders himself, as he walks over to the horse.

"What if I wasn't dating Merrill?" she calls out angrily. "Would ya fuck me then?"

"No," he winces at the crude word. "I wouldn't." - It still wouldn't be right! -

"Oh, well, let me guess. I'm not good enough for the perfect country minister and his flock, am I? I'm a ... what did you call me? A harlot? Not all pure and innocent like Colleen was?"

"Leave my wife out of this!" he swings around, hissing in fury. "She was a good woman!"

"She's DEAD! Do you really think she cares now if you dip into city water? You haven't had sex in what ... four months now? I bet she's laughing her ass off like any woman would be wondering why you're being so stupid!"

"You don't know her!" he shouts, taking a step towards her. "You're not the kind of woman she'd want for me!"

"What?!" Star begins to laugh now. "Want for you? You make it sound like I'm asking ya to marry me, Rev. I just wanted to get off ... rock your boat, you dumb country fuck! That's all!"

"That's another reason why it's 'no'," his voice lowers. "I don't have relations with women before marriage."

"You're too much! You fucking crack me up!" she laughs again. "I'm not stupid, Rev. You're gonna wear your hand out or use up all the water in the well on those cold showers while I'm here."

"Then leave," he snaps, not bothering to deny the truth. "We don't need you here."

"Fine! I will ... right now!" And she turns, walking straight into the woods.

"Wait! You'll get lost!"

"Fuck you!" she yells and walks faster, purposely rushing off the trail so that she can't be easily followed on horseback.

"Star!" Graham runs off the trail, trying to catch sight of her.

- Rejected ME?! - she starts to run, desperate to get away from him.- How could he?! I know he wants it bad! -
"Leave me alone! I don't want your ass anymore! Keep it for your fucking god!"

CRACK! She trips over a log, cracks her head on a large rock, and blood sprays everywhere .. darkness swiftly overtaking her. "Star! I'm sorry!" he's shouting, as he looks frantically for her, willing to say anything now to find her, anything at feeling that horrible memory come rushing back at knowing his wife died because of their own fight.

- What the heck?! - he ducks at feeling something swoop low over him to land on the limb of a massive tree about 30 feet away. Looking at it, a large Cardinal, he can feel the bird staring back at him, but it's only a bird, and Graham continues to walk in the other direction he was going.

"Star!" he shouts again, and the bird squawks .... loudly.

And this time it hits him like a ton of bricks. In moments, he's almost tripping over her prone body by the tree. "Oh my God, Star!" he cries in anguish at seeing all the blood.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the ER, Star is immediately placed on a gurney and rushed into an examination room, where Graham is pushed out to wait in the hallway. The praying begins in earnest. - Don't take her too! Please God don't take her too! -

And this time, God, or someone, is listening. Soon Graham is sobbing alone in both relief and fear after being told by his doctor that Star is still alive, although in a coma now, and there is nothing more they can do.

CHAPTER 11

When he's finally composed himself enough, Graham calls the sitter to ask if she will spend the night, and the lady immediately assures him that she won't leave until either he or Merrill comes home.

- Merrill? How could I forget? - an extremely guilty Graham thinks at hearing his brother's name. Unfortunately, he is not able to reach him and is forced to leave messages, telling him to come home as soon as possible because Star is in the hospital. Once done, a very long night is spent by Star's bedside, holding her hand and praying fervently.

Early the next morning, Merrill walks in, having caught the first bus home that he could after receiving the message and borrowing a friend's car in town. "What the fuck happened?" he hisses at Graham at seeing him asleep on her arm.

Graham jumps, immediately releases her arm, and the minister who would normally rebuke his brother for such profanity, guiltily tells him almost everything that happened, leaving out only the childhood incident and how she kissed him.

"You're saying she was walking in the woods ... tripped and fell?"

"Yes," Graham mumbles, hating himself for lying because he knows she was running from him. - I'm sinning. God forgive me, but I have to protect him! -

Merrill may not be trained like his brother in some ways, but he can still sense that there's more to it than Graham is saying. - Graham's never done a sinful thing in his entire adult life. He can't be interested in Star, can he? After all his warnings about me dating her, he wouldn't try to hurt her, would he? Not Graham, no way.- "Go home. I'll stay with her," he says after carefully thinking about it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All that day and into the night, Merrill sits with Star until he finally decides that he had better drop his friend's car off and walk home for a break before returning again later. It's 4 am and Graham is sitting up alone, staring blankly at the TV screen. The phone rings only moments after Merrill has stepped in the door, and they both jump to answer it, but Merrill, already standing, reaches it first, and the doctor tells him that they can come and see Star at 8 am; she has just awoken.

Promptly at 8, the whole family arrives in her room. She's sitting up in bed, watching TV and easily smiles at Merrill and the kids, but when her gaze falls on Graham, the last one to enter the room, it turns hard. And knowing now that any chance at friendship they may have had is gone, his eyes sadly turn from hers towards the floor.

After a short visit, the nurse arrives to inform them that she needs more testing done, and Merrill and the kids reluctantly begin kissing her goodbye. "Wait a minute, Star," Bo suddenly cries, pulling a small newspaper wrapped item from her pocket. "I almost forgot something."

Star holds her hand out, smiling at the child's thoughtfulness at bringing her a gift, but she suddenly feels a wave of dizziness hit her when she sees what it is. "Mommy and I think you might like this now. She gave it to me when I was sick a long time ago. Now it belongs to you. I hope you like them too. They're mine and Mommy's favorite."

Even Graham is shocked. Bo has given Star a very special snow globe Colleen once gave her; a globe filled with pretty fall foliage leaves and a family of four Cardinals sitting in a tree.

"Th... thank you, Bo," Star stammers, her eyes glancing upwards at Graham's pale face.

"You're welcome. I'll tell Mommy you like it."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day, after passing all the hospital tests with flying colors, Merrill is allowed to bring her home. The doctors have advised Star to rest as much as she can for a few days and that she may have headaches for a while. If the headaches do not diminish after a week or so, then she should come right back in for another check-up.

To keep herself busy, she camps out in the living room for easier access to her work, and Merrill happily waits on her hand and foot. Many board games are played with the kids, and, occasionally, the kids convince Graham to play too. Too often, though, it makes him especially uncomfortable when Merrill is at work, and he usually does his best to simply avoid being around Star now, for both their sakes.

One evening Star decides she's had enough, and still being quite angry that he had the nerve to reject her, she tells him, "Don't worry, Rev. I'm leaving in a few days. Thirtieth birthday is coming. Not about to spend it here."

"Good," he grunts. - She has to leave! I can't keep this up! -

"You were praying over me, weren't you?" she asks before he can escape again.

"Of course." - Lord, don't make her pick a fight with me now! -

"I could hear you. I couldn't see anything, but I could hear you praying to your god."

"HE must have wanted you to hear me. HE let you come back." - Oh God, here it comes! -

"I don't get you," she says, confusing him now by not yelling. "You have complete faith in this GOD. You raise your family in his name, do what you think is his work, live your life the way you think you have to, and then .... BAM.... he takes your wife away, kills her horribly. I wouldn't give my faith to someone like that."

Star doesn't know it, of course, but she's just struck a very raw nerve with this minister, something he's been grappling with privately since that night of horror. His faith has been in question for months, and hearing someone else say his own thoughts out loud is only serving to push him further over the edge .. . making him even more vulnerable.

"Star, I think it will be a good thing when you leave," is all he will say about it, as he turns away to leave the room.

"Holy shit!" she exclaims, comprehension dawning on her. "You're a minister having a fucking crisis of faith, aren't ya, Rev? Well, come on over to the dark side, lots more fun here!" And she jumps off the couch and advances on him, licking her lips with a wicked grin on her face.

"Stay away," he cries, backing up with his hands out front as though to ward her off. "Don't touch me! You're .... you're evil!"

"What are you talking about," she starts laughing hysterically. "I'm not evil!"

"Then why .... why do you have a pentagram on your ... your....?" his voice lowers, as his eyes drop down on her.

"When did you? .. Ohhhhh, the mud fight night. You fucking amaze me! You're so high and mighty, but you must've REALLY looked if you saw it! It's a STAR, you dumb shit. Not a pentagram. Merrill barely blinked an eye, and YOU thought it meant I was EVIL?"

"No, not really," he shakes his head, embarrassed at her laughter. "I ... I just ... you ...you ... never mind. Just go back to the city."

"I will!" she shouts at his retreating back. "Wouldn't want to turn ya into a fucking MAN!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Merrill comes home earlier than normal that night, it is pretty obvious that Star is upset and stressing over something, although she naturally can't talk about it with him. Normally, when stressed, sex would do the trick for her, but since the doctor advised her to refrain for a few days after such a head injury, she's decided it's high time to teach Merrill something new in hopes that it will at least relieve her headache.

Lying back against the couch, she makes him crouch on the floor between her legs and slowly lap at her, instructing the very eager pupil on just what to do. Unfortunately for Graham, unable to sleep, he happens to pick that time to go down to the kitchen for a glass of warm milk and walks right by the living room getting an eyeful of what Merrill is doing. Merrill, being too busy at concentrating on his goal of making Star cum this way, does not even hear Graham behind him, but Star, her eyes open, immediately saw Graham freeze, and they're staring at each other now, as her hand begins to deliberately stroke through Merrill's hair.

Moaning softly, eyes locked together, her other hand runs very slowly up over her breasts to her mouth and seductively draws a finger in and out from between her full red lips. Graham's mouth drops open, and the broken glass he had just picked up from the upstairs hallway from a Cardinal knick knack that had fallen from it's shelf, cuts deeply into his clenching hand.

She breaks eye contact to glance at his crotch, and Graham simply can't take it anymore. Forgetting his milk, he races up the stairs to the bathroom, and Star pushes Merrill away. "Need a cig from my room. Be right back."

"I'll get them. Doctor wants you to rest," he instantly offers.

"Been sitting on my ass long enough. Wait here and we'll finish up in a minute." And with a deep kiss to keep him in place, she heads up the stairs.

Graham is just exiting the bathroom with a small thin towel wrapped around his hand when Star walks up to him. "You hurt yourself," she states .. not a question.

"It's fine. Aren't you busy?" he sneers and tries to push past her.

But knowing he won't dare make enough noise to wake the kids or bring Merrill to them, she easily manages to block his way in the small hallway, grab hold of his hand and yank off the towel. "What did you clean it with?" she asks, slightly worried now at seeing what the man actually did to himself.

"Cold water. Now let go of me."

"Does it hurt? It's still bleeding."

He doesn't bother to answer, only tries to pull his hand away now, but Star can feel the effort is very half-hearted, almost reluctant, and holding his hand tighter, she slowly lifts it to her face, as she stares into his eyes. Graham, feeling suddenly as though he's being hypnotized, tries once more weakly to pull away, then gives up and watches in a helpless daze, as her lips move towards his hand.

"Ahhhh," he moans when she gently kisses the wound, and her tongue darts out to lick at the remaining blood.

It happened so fast, one minute her mouth was there and the next, she's moving back down the stairs, headache temporarily gone. And Graham, left alone to look at his hand, sees that the bleeding has stopped, carefully wraps the towel around it again, and begins to wonder if his life could possibly become any more insane. A question that is soon to be answered.

Laying in bed, picturing her face moaning on his couch, his towel-wrapped hand eventually makes it way down his abdomen, and Graham subsequently finds that a headache he didn't even know he had, has melted away with the brief physical relief.


CHAPTER 12

Star continues to spend days camped out in the living room like the doctor wanted, but no matter how much rest she gets, the headaches simply won't go away, and, eventually, they bother her so much she loses even the urge to fool around with Merrill. Graham often finds her mixing teas from her little bags, and it worries him, but the one time he tries to talk to her about the headaches, she throws the mug at him in an explosive fit and stalks away, leaving him to shake his head at her strange stubbornness and wild temper that only seems to show it's face at him and no one else.

Although he is glad she declines going to church this week, he finds himself hurrying through the service to get back home, not entirely sure if he is worried about leaving her alone in his house, or because he wants to remain within shouting distance if she should need help while she is still recovering. He may avoid her most of the time, but he never seems to go very far.

Soon Star is packing to go back to the city. The headaches are troubling her more than she would ever let on, and she'd rather spend time alone at her own home before giving in and going back to a doctor. Merrill, of course, wants to go with her.

"Merrill, you can do whatever you want, but my place really isn't big enough for two. I'd end up killing you," she laughs.

"I ... I just don't want to lose touch. And didn't you finally admit to me you were a little nervous about Tony?"

"Not anymore," she smiles and speaks truthfully. "I talked to him again. He's cooled down. I'll be in touch, Merrill. Stay here with your family."

"Ok," his mouth turns sadly. "I'll come and visit as soon as I can get off work again."

"I'd like that," she grins and kisses him. - Such a sweet kid. -

- Good, she's leaving. Things can go back to normal around here. - And Graham silently congratulates himself for staying strong, resisting temptation, and never truly crossing the line with her.

"Daddy?" Bo cries, near to tears. "Please make Star stay. We really like her."

"I'm sorry, Honey. I know Star plays with you, but she needs to go home. She doesn't belong here." - As much as I wish she did. -

"Yes she does," Bo sighs and walks away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day progresses, and Graham keeps himself extra busy, trying hard to keep his mind off her leaving now when he foolishly stops to watch her and Merrill begin carrying bags to the car. - I'll wave from the window, - he thinks in a panic. - No, I'll wave from the porch! Maybe I should go to the bus station with them?! ...... Oh God! She can't go! -

BERILLL! Her cell phone rings ... Mariah.

A few moments later ... "Merrill, is it cool for my friends to come over tomorrow? I'll go home with them the next day."

"We don't have room," Graham immediately interrupts, picturing disturbing images of more city people roaming through his house. No one will ever know just how close he came to saying, 'Yes! Just stay longer with me'.

"Don't worry, Rev," she frowns at him. "They're gonna stay in town. Just wanna come to the country to celebrate my 30th birthday tomorrow. Something different for them."

"How many?" he asks.

"Only six friends plus me. They won't get in your way. Won't even know we're here."

"Men?" he narrows his eyes at the thought of Star bringing one of her other boyfriends here.

"No," she laughs. - Hmmmm why would he care since he turned me down? -

"What about me?" Merrill teases. "Am I invited?"

"Sorry Babe," she smiles at him. "Girls only. I'm thinking we'll hang out in the barn." - Although it WOULD be fun to add a guy once in a while. Someone flexible yet strong. -

"Ohhh," Merrill laughs. "Slumber party kinda thing? Maybe we should crash it, Graham."

Graham, however, suddenly feeling very nervous about something he can't quite put his finger on, forces himself to smile at his brother, and turns away, saying over his shoulder, "No liquor, Star."

"Don't worry, Rev. We won't be drinking," she smiles.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The women show up the next evening in Mariah's van, and Graham looks them over carefully. Several of the younger ones are dressed like Star in contemporary city-type clothing, but the older ones are much more casual in appearance, almost country-like. The oldest, around late 50's, is Mariah, and she looks to be still living her Hippy days of the 60's. Mariah is also looking at Graham closely, as though assessing him, and it begins to make him so uncomfortable that he quickly makes up an excuse to go into town with the kids.

"Why don't you go too, Merrill?" Star suggests. "Give us a chance to catch up. We only see each other once a month, usually."

DING! Another bell goes off in Graham's head, but being the man that he is, he's still quite clueless.

The minute the women are left alone in the house, most of them begin giggling about how lucky Star is to have two such attractive males wanting her, and Star easily laughs along with them, at first. It isn't until one of the women cracks a joke about moving to the country and finding God now that Star freezes and turns an icy stare on the suddenly nervous woman.

Mariah, of course, immediately sees the look, could feel the warmth between Merrill and Star and the very strong unfulfilled tension between Star and Graham, and says with her firm leadership voice, "Ladies, hands to yourself. These two males belong to Star. Both of them."

It has the desired effect of making the women look down and feel admonished for even joking about stepping on another's property. There is no doubt that Mariah controls this group and that Star is well liked by their leader. "He's not really .....," Star tries to protest, but is cut off with a, "Show me your room, Star. Just the two of us," by Mariah.

As they're walking up the stairs, the others look among themselves, wondering what is going on even more so now. It is already slightly strange that they are not having the ritual 30th celebration in their normal field and have come all the way to the country for it instead.

"This is his room, correct?" Mariah states, as they walk past Graham's room.

"No. Merrill's room is right over here."

"I do not mean the boy. I mean the room belonging to the alpha. It's THIS one. I can feel it."

"Yes, Mariah, that's the Rev's room," Star sighs wearily. - If that coward is alpha, I'm the Queen of fucking England! -

"You have not taken him yet, have you?" she asks. "I sense unresolved heat between you."

"Oh that," Star laughs now. "It's gonna stay unresolved. I tried and he said no. Chicken shit about Merrill, his wife, the whole bad girl thing I've got. Guess he thinks he'll go to hell if we fuck. He had his chance and blew it."

"Good that he resisted you," Mariah notes calmly. "Shows how strong he is, strong like an alpha should be to be able to resist one such as you. He will break the next time, I am sure. All males break, even alphas ... for the right female."

"Next time?" Star laughs again. "Won't be a next time. I'm leaving with you after the party." - I don't need Rev! Alpha or not! Got tons of guys when I want them! Guys that know how to fucking submit! -

Mariah doesn't say anything, but walks right into Graham's room. Although she has been talking confidently, she is still not entirely sure about what is happening here and has decided that she needs to see concrete proof ... that it's time to tell Star of her destiny.

"I see no pictures of his wife anywhere?" she asks.

"Yeah, Merrill said they've all been put away for a while now."

And Mariah feels it, a strong feeling to open the top drawer of Graham's dresser. Open it to end the mystery eating at her. Within moments, his sketchpad is found and pulled out first. The first picture is of the horse that Star had already seen on their 'date', but lifting the page, they see another of the horse, this time with a figure astride it, a figure Star, a figure nude.

- I can't believe it! - Star's eyes widen that Graham would actually draw her that way, and her hand flies to her mouth in full shock when they see the third and final sketch, Star laying nude on Graham's bed with a soft smile on her face.
The picture is so perfectly detailed, every nuance of her body shown, even the tattoo, just barely penciled in behind the small lines of her pubic hair, that it almost appears that the figure is alive and breathing. And, at this point, Star is not sure whether she should feel proud that he drew her so well or extremely upset that he would do it without her knowledge. She is one very confused woman.

Smiling knowingly, Mariah places the sketchpad back into the drawer and pulls out a framed picture. The moment Star sees it, the hand is flying to her mouth again, gasping loudly. It's a picture of Graham standing behind Colleen with his arms wrapped around her, each smiling happily at the camera.

"But that's ... that's .," Star stammers in shock.

"Yes," Mariah says with a relieved sigh. "I suspected it when you told me about the country fair kiss and his name. Colleen told me the same thing almost 15 years ago when she first joined my circle. I had a good feeling about what she said about the man, even though he worships a different god, and I encouraged her to marry him, not that she really needed any encouragement. Her heart was leading her true."

"How? Why didn't we know? I don't understand."

"Simply because Colleen is a very common name, Star. In the city, she hid behind an old family surname on her mother's side ... Starr, S T A R R. I have only discovered this recently, myself, that it was not her married name."

"Gaia! That's one of MY mother's family names too!"

"I had suspected it might be when all these signs were pointing to you and her. You are most likely blood related, cousins of some kind through the women in your families. If she hadn't felt the need to hide, probably because of her Christian life here with her husband, we would have known much sooner. She never told any of us, even me, much about her private life or where she was from. When she stopped coming, I had no way of finding out what had happened to her. She never sought me out for anything more than spiritual guidance occasionally. We were not true friends like you and I are. Her friend was Graham. All those years, as long as she came once a month, was all that mattered to me. I had bumped into her on the street when she was visiting family and knew instantly that she had the gift of sight, like me, like you, and, I would imagine, her daughter too."

"I don't have .," Star starts to automatically protest, trying not to think of all the strange dreams since meeting Merrill. "But what does all this mean? Why can't it all just be coincidence?"

"Star, my child, you believe in signs from the Mother like we all do. Does this REALLY feel like just a coincidence to you?"

"No, I guess not," she admits reluctantly. "You think Colleen wants me to . with Graham?"

"Yes I do," Mariah nods her head firmly. "And even more importantly, I think Gaia wants you to."

"Oh gee," Star can't help but respond sarcastically. "Well, since I have the approval of a ghost and the high spirit, I may as well just rape him, huh?"

"Star," Mariah chastises. "This is a serious matter. There's something building inside you, something much more than second sight. Graham could be the key to unlocking it. You may never reach your full potential if you don't let destiny take it's course and claim this male."

"Fuck destiny!" she shouts and stands up. "I'm not fucking him because someone WANTS me to! I'll fuck him if I want to! NO ONE makes my choices for me!"

"What happens will happen," Mariah says quietly, as she places the picture back in the drawer and they leave the room, praying to herself that she didn't just make matters worse by telling Star the truth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When the family returns from their trip to town, Graham, not able to shake the strange feeling from meeting this particular group of women, decides to send the kids to a friend's home for the night. The man is going to be very glad he did.

"Don't worry, Merrill," Star assures him after he's just received a call to come into work. "You won't miss anything interesting. I'll see you in the morning before I leave."

"OK," he smiles and kisses her in front of everyone. "Have fun with your friends. I know you insisted on no presents, but maybe I can do something instead."

"We'll see how I feel tomorrow," she grins at the eager look on his face.

- Would have liked to give her a Bible for a present! - Graham can't help but think half-seriously.

And soon she is waving fondly at Merrill, as he drives away in Graham's car for the rest of the night.


11 PM: "Hey Rev, we're headed out to the barn now."

His eyes flick from Star to Mariah and back again, and with a shrug of his shoulders, he sits down to turn on the TV, calling out a last reminder, "Don't forget, Star. I meant it, no liquor."

Several of the women giggle, and Star glowers at the back of his head, but her headache has become much worse suddenly, and she decides that she's just not up to starting an all out fight with the man in front of her friends. "Don't worry, Rev," she says, trying to keep it light. "Just gonna be a bunch of naked women burning incense and doing all kinds of unholy things."

For the briefest of seconds, Graham actually believes her, and Star laughs loudly at seeing the look of horror come over his face. But that look of horror suddenly turns to worry when Star stops laughing and begins wincing in pain, her hand pressing against the side of her head, as she takes a step back to steady herself.

"I'm calling a doctor tomorrow if you don't," he says, stepping towards her.

Hand back down at her side, she looks up and snaps angrily, "No, I can take care of myself."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

About 45 minutes later, Graham is dozing on the couch when he hears what sounds like chanting coming from his barn. - No no no no - he thinks, as he creeps over and slips silently in the door, praying that he's wrong.

- Holy Mother of God! They're all naked! They're .... they're WITCHES! -


CHAPTER 13

Mariah, sensing the presence of such a strong male in their midst now, smiles to herself and continues with the ritual. Candles are burning everywhere, the smell of incense heavy in the air, and the women are holding hands and chanting while Star lies on her back in the middle of the circle.

From his hiding place, Graham watches as Mariah begins to paint symbols on Star's bare breasts and stomach .... fertility symbols, unrecognizable to him. A beautiful ornate silver knife is used to slice each woman's palm just enough to press drops of their blood to be mixed together onto the painted stomach. Star is very calm, although her head feels as if it could explode at any minute.

"It's almost time," Mariah announces. "Your thirtieth year is about to begin."

The candles suddenly flicker, although Graham feels no breeze. He is frozen in mind-numbing fear and astonishment at watching a real life pagan ritual. The women, seeing the candles flicker, drop hands and begin to look around worriedly now. Mariah is not the least bit worried. She knows from her dreams what is about to happen ... Gaia's will, Star's destiny.

Star, still prone on the floor, begins to lift into the air, and her eyes fly wide open at seeing the barn ceiling coming closer to her. "Help me!" she cries to her startled friends, who have never seen anything like it before.

Mariah stands and reaches her hands upward. "Star, it is YOU doing this. No one else. Gaia has given you more power now. You must concentrate and bring yourself down. We can not help you."

"I'm scared! I ... I can't breathe," she begins gasping.

Graham is tensing to do something ... what ... he has no idea, and he starts to look around the barn frantically in search of a way to help Star. She may be hovering high in the air, but all astonishment is gone, only fear for her safety forefront in his mind now.

"Star! It's the power flowing through you from the Mother," Mariah tries to explain to her frightened friend. "It's YOUR power now. You must control it. Breathe ... breathe!"

Gasping for air louder, Star can barely hear anything but the desperate beating of her heart now. Her body has begun to shake violently, when, suddenly, the sound of old milk bottles breaking, wood snapping, and the barn shaking fills the air.

"Star!" Mariah shouts, as the group huddles around her in fear. "Control it! Control it before it consumes you!"

"I can't," Star rasps in terror. "It's too much ... too much in me." And drawing in a last desperate breath, she screams for the only true safety her soul is searching for, "GRAHAMMMM!!!"

Graham doesn't think twice. He runs out from behind a bale of hay to catch her, as she plummets to the ground and the candles go out. Mariah, seeing that Star is in the alpha's arms and breathing, quickly pushes everyone out, closing the barn door behind them. - Gaia, - she prays in her mind. - I pray that I have followed your wishes correctly in bringing them together. I pray that the alpha male will not let his bondaged mind blind his pure heart and harm the alpha female now that he has seen what kind of women we really are. -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Star! Star!" Graham is crying, as he holds her face and cradles her bare body against his.

Eyes full of fear at what's happening around them, she looks up at him. Timbers continue to crack, glass break, and the very ground beneath them is quaking now.

"Help me please," she pleads, holding her head in pain. "Make it stop, Graham. It's tearing me apart inside ... burning."

"Tell me how! I don't know witchcraft! I'm a man of God!"

"Not witchcraft," she moans. "Not evil. I swear, Graham. It's Wicca. Not evil."

A quick nod of relief, understanding what she means, although, of course, he's not particularly happy about it. Paganism may not be evil, but it is still not Christian. "We have to get out of here," he says, trying to remain calm, as he looks up at the dust and hay raining down from the shaking timbers. And lifting her off the ground, he runs to the door to discover that it can't be opened, an almost impossibility. - There's no lock on this door! It should open easily! - "Mariah!" he yells. "Open the door!" - She must have wedged it closed somehow from the other side! -

Mariah, naturally, wants to assure the man that she has not locked it. - But if I speak, he'll remain at the door and waste time. He must move on to the next step! The barn is coming apart! He must move on before it's too late! -

"MARIAH!!" he screams now at the top of his lungs. "For the love of God! Star needs help! She's your friend! Help me!"

When no response is given, he forces himself to calm just long enough to consider another way out. - There's a window to the shed from the hayloft! - And carrying Star up the ladder, he gently lays her in the hay and tries to open the window. - NO! - The window won't budge.

The loft is shaking now too, and Star sits up, huddled in terror, as Graham begins to look around for something he can break the window with. "AHHHHHHH!!" she howls in pain and clutches at her head.

The search is immediately stopped, and Graham runs right back to her to fall to his knees, embracing her tightly, as she sobs against him. He can feel an unnatural heat radiating from her body, amazingly followed by his own body beginning to respond in kind, a kind of heat building in him that he's never felt before.

The sobbing ceases, and feeling their mutual arousal now, she looks up at him in confusion to stare deeply into his eyes, trying to understand what is happening. Reflecting back at her is the same fire coursing through her own body, and both panting now from the intensity of it, Star suddenly knows what she has to do to make it stop .. make the fire cool, make the pain go away, and make the barn quiet again.

She grabs his face in her hands, just like she did at the kissing booth, and attacks his mouth. Unlike the glen, however, this time Graham's instincts kick in before his guilty mind can stop it, and his mouth opens immediately to hers.

*QUIET*

That very moment he responded in kind, the noise around them abruptly stopped, and the barn became still again. Unfortunately, Star's head is still splitting, her body still burning, and although they are kissing passionately now, clinging to each other while ravaging the other's lips and tongue, she knows it's not enough.

THUMP! Star has pushed Graham down hard onto the loft floor and is sitting astride him; ready to do whatever she has to for peace. No longer kissing, his eyes clear and the guilt comes rushing back. "No, we can't," he just barely manages to choke out.

"Too late, Rev," she grins and glances at a coil of rope lying nearby.

"Don't do this, Star," he gasps, almost wetting his pants in fright for a brief second when the rope moves on it's own and swiftly ties his hands spread to the loft railing.

"I have to, Rev," she says, not bothering to question how she even knew that she could make the rope move with her mind. "I think I'm gonna die if I don't. You want to," she pushes her bare center down on his to bring a moan of pleasure from him. "You know you do. Pull on the rope all you want if it makes you feel better. Mariah said you're a strong alpha, and now I know she was right. Guess you were just keeping it hidden behind that collar you wear for your god."

"No," he groans, pulling as hard as he can on the rope, trying to force his mind off the radiant pressure of her body over his hips.

"Yes," she pushes down again to elicit another very male moan. "I think you're the only man that can do this, Rev, the only one strong enough for me, alpha enough. But just remember, you may be alpha, but tonight I'm YOUR alpha." And she suddenly stands, as his jeans are ripped right down his legs by only her thoughts.

RIIIIP! His shirt immediately follows, and now the minister is lying in just his boxers, socks and boots. Placing one long leg on each side of him, she continues to stand, watching his reaction to her scent reaching down to him, watching his manhood strain against the thin material to free itself from confinement.

With the full moon shining in the window behind her, her body has taken on an almost unearthly glow, as perspiration glistens on her skin and her hair ripples around her shoulders as though moving on it's own. Very slowly, she runs her hands up her thighs, over her stomach, breasts and through her hair, saying, "Tell me Rev. Tell me what you want."

"Noooo," he moans, shaking his head. "I can't."

"Oh, I think you can. And ya know something? You've seen me enough, even drawn me. I think it's MY turn now."

And ... RIIIIP! The boxers come off, and Star sees him for the first time, absolutely stunning, perfect and more than ready. Careful to keep her body from actually touching it, she kneels down over him while Graham, laid bare now, gives in to the desperate need to feel this woman and pushes up with his hips in search of release, moaning lowly, "Oh God, Oh God."

A wicked smile at his submission, she quickly pulls up out of his reach, rejecting him as he once did her. And leaning her breasts over his face, a tantalizing nipple only inches from his mouth, she makes her demand. "Take it. Suckle me."

Graham may be staring at the perfect pink nipple being offered, but he has not forgotten the pagan painting that was done on her breasts, and seeing those strange symbols again so close to him now gives him strength once more. "JEZEBEL!" he hisses up at her, followed by a scream of pain when Star casually reaches behind and squeezes his scrotum quite hard.

"You're going to hell!" he cries, fighting with everything he has to keep back the orgasm that almost exploded through the agony when she finally touched his bare skin down there.

"IF there's a hell, I have a feeling you'll be right behind me, Rev." And she stands straight, trying to think on what she should do now while Graham begins to pray out loud.

"Stop it," she says, clutching her head again. But Graham isn't about to stop, and he keeps right on doing it, as he looks over her shoulder and stares at the moon out the window. "Stop it!" she yells louder. "STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT! OH GAIA, MY HEAD!!"

And the praying continues, until Star, desperate to quiet the man and make the pain in her head and body go away, falls back down on him, her groin landing right on top of his face. Immediately, Graham tries to move his head away, but a frantic Star holds him tight between her thighs and the rubbing starts. The man may never have wanted to do anything unconventional like this before, but the urgent need to taste this one woman is suddenly overwhelming, and his mouth opens, a virgin tongue hesitantly touching at her core.

"Yessss," she hisses when she feels him responding, but realizing from his timid approach he is doing something new like Merrill did, she begins to instruct him. "Lick me, Rev. Use that tongue you're so good at praying with on me now. Lick me long and hard."

Although he's groaning in frustration, not believing what he's doing but unable to stop himself, Graham does everything Star tells him to, learning just when, where and how to lick, suck and nip at her ripe womanhood. She's groaning, herself, pulling at her nipples in desperation to cum, but, somehow, Star knows she won't this time. She can sit on this man's face forever, and this ONE time her body will not be given what it needs so badly.

With a frustrated cry, she lifts off him to sit high on his chest, just out of reach of his straining member. His glazed eyes lock onto hers, his mouth opens to gasp, "I need ....."

"Tell me," she leans towards him. "Tell me what you need," her mouth moves even closer to his.

"God forgive me," he moans. "I need you, Star." And his head reaches up, trying for a kiss.

At Graham's willing declaration of his need for her, Star smiles triumphantly and pulls back once more so that their lips never actually touch. Her hand swiftly and expertly lifts his steady shaft to plunge herself on it, forcing him to fill her completely.

For Star, the moment they joined brought a complete and abrupt end to her headaches, and she will never be made to suffer from them again. For Graham, the act of penetration within this certain woman finally releases something buried deep inside him, something he's never once let out, not even with his wonderful Colleen. It may some day be something Star will regret releasing.

He's growling and straining again at the rope, no longer in fear or anger to get loose, but now with the need to let the savageness within him at the body above him, to take the female like it truly wants to, claim and devour .... beneath him.

Star, seeing the freed wild lust in his eyes and hearing his frenzied grunts of animal-like frustration, knows that she's just unchained the true male within this man, and smiles evilly down at him, as she rides his thrashing body at will. She may have the power now, but something is telling her from his burning eyes that if she is actually foolish enough to let him loose, SHE will be the one laying flat on her back and slammed into the floor.

Her fingernails begin digging into his chest muscles, her thighs tightening even more around his hips, as Star finds herself rushing towards the quickest and most fevered climax she's ever felt. "OH GAIA!!"

The scream of rapture brings Graham's sanity back for a second, his mouth smiling happily that he was able to bring her so much pleasure. But the sanity is fleeting, as he feels now the same all-consuming blaze racing through his own body, and his eyes lose touch again with everything but the fire about to consume him.

Star, although still reeling, can feel that he's about to climax too. Hips are pumping frantically up at her, arms still straining desperately to take hold of her, mouth opening to scream, when going on instinct only, she calls out with her mind for the group's ritual knife, and it instantly flies through the air into her hand.

Just as Graham explodes in a fury of mind-shattering thrusts deep within her, five lines are carved into the flesh above his heart, five lines forming a star. "OH GOD!!" he shrieks, as his body convulses in euphoria and blood runs down his chest.

The minister has reached a point where he can feel nothing but his long-awaited release, and even if he were aware of it, he would not care what the woman did to him, for the moment, as long as his torment was finally quelled. Smiling proudly, she watches him slowly come back from his own heights, feeling his body trembling in satisfaction now, as he looks up at her in wonderment and his arms lay limp in the rope.

"Wha ... what?" he gasps, trying to make sense of what just happened between them, a raging inferno he never knew could exist between two people.

"Thanks for helping me get rid of that headache, Rev. I suppose you wanna hold me now?" she asks with just a hint of a smirk.

His face changes immediately, turning stone-like in its glare. "No, you little witch. I want to tie YOU up now."

"You're learning," she laughs. "But this is one witch that's not about to let you fuck her and then pray over her. Besides, I don't think you realize just who owns WHO now," and she looks down at his chest. "Your holier than thou ass is mine, Preacherboy."

"YOU BITCH!" he roars when he sees what she's done to him, and, for a moment the thick rope is pulled at so hard that Star is sure he'll finally break it this time.

When it doesn't break, however, she laughs again and stands up. And while he hisses in anger and snaps his teeth at her, she quickly dips her fingers into herself to pull out their combined essence and rub it into the bleeding flesh, marking the man further. "Wonder what your fawning flock would think if they could see you now, Rev?" she mocks him. "Not sure if the ladies would faint from shock or start cat-fighting to see who could jump you first."

"Get off my land!" he bellows. "Get off now or so help me God I'll have you arrested!

"For what?" she snorts. "Rape? I didn't rape you. You said you needed me, even tried to kiss me. How quickly men forget. That's why I left you a reminder. Might wanna put a bandage on it for a while, though, so it doesn't bleed through your pretty white shirt when you're preaching about sin at church."

"ARGHHH!!" he screams and thrashes against the rope.

Shaking her head in amusement at his helplessness, she quickly cuts one of his hands loose and runs naked out of the barn. The women are dressed and ready to go with the van running, as Mariah had suddenly sensed only minutes earlier that it was about to end badly and swiftly organized them for retreat.

Star jumps into the van, seeing all her bags and equipment packed for her, just as Graham comes racing out of the barn, pulling his torn pants on. For a moment, the women, seeing his bloodstained chest and wild fury, instinctively freeze in terror at the sight of an uncontrollable alpha male about to reach them, but Mariah is the first to come to her senses, and the van peals out of the driveway.

As they pull away, laughter flows on the night to reach Graham's ears, and he throws his shirt down in a fit to howl in agony at seeing the object of his torment getting away.


CHAPTER 14

As she throws on clothes within the van, Star laughs along with the women at seeing Graham screaming at them helplessly in the driveway. - I can't feel bad for him. He wanted it too. True, not the way I did it to him, but he found release, just like me. No way we can have anything more than that. We're just too different. -

Wishing that she could stop at the neighbor's house to say goodbye to the kids, but knowing that she can't at such a late hour, she turns to Mariah with another request instead. "I need a minute at the fuel station on Main Street, Mariah. Can we stop so I can see Merrill?"

"Do you think that's wise? He is not alpha, but if he suspects, it will rip their family apart. If you are not going to stay and be with Graham, there is no reason to harm their family unit."

"Mariah!" she cries defensively. "I NEVER said I wanted to stay with Graham! I just wanted to fuck him, and I did. If I stayed, we'd end up killing each other now! I just gotta say goodbye to Merrill. I really like the kid a lot. If he wants to come to the city to see me later, I've got no problem with that."

Mariah simply shakes her head in disbelief.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Merrill, I have to leave right now. Something's come up. I can't stay. Please tell the kids I'll miss them."

Naturally, Merrill tries to push her for a better explanation. "What's going on? I don't understand. Did something happen at the house? You gotta tell me, Star. Don't just leave."

"I'm NOT going into it with you!" her temper flares at him for the first time. "Just call me if you wanna stay in touch. Otherwise, fuck off. I need space now."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks later, Merrill has called her three times, but Star keeps the conversation brief, refusing to come back to the country when he asks and telling him to come to her if he wants to keep dating. Graham purposely stays away when he knows they're talking, afraid now that he won't be able to control himself and will scream into the phone in front of Merrill.

He has hardly slept or eaten and has tried fervently praying for his lost soul, but his prayers feel completely emotionless now, drained and false for some reason, and he finally gives up talking to God. His dreams of Colleen have stopped, and he only dreams of Star now; what she did to him in the barn and what he wants to do to her, do like the animal brutality of movies he saw once many years ago, ravage the woman in a way he's never once considered before and then gently kiss her when he's finally satiated.

Often, he finds himself staring at his chest in a mirror and running his fingers over the horrid mark, fuming silently that he will never again be able to swim or work around the house shirtless like normal. - At least I can look at it in a mirror and it's not upside-down like hers! -

He teeters back and forth between going to the city and having it out with her, or just being relieved that she's gone now. Days blend together, one after the other, and no matter what he does to keep himself busy, he feels empty, empty and dead. So dead, in fact, that the guilt that would normally eat at him when thinking about Merrill or his wife is soon surpassed by the enormous feeling of senseless existence.

Merrill is in his own funk too, saving his money for a trip to the city to see her again and trying hard not to call her too often so as not to appear desperate. It doesn't help either man that the children continually mope around the house, often asking their father and uncle to bring her back. Bo and Morgan are just as lost as their father.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Star spends the first few days back in the city riding a high of victory over Graham, missing Merrill a little, and missing the children a lot. As soon as she's settled back into her apartment, she tries to call forth her power again, with little success. In total frustration, she calls Mariah. "What the fuck is wrong with me? Now I can barely move a pencil across a table!"

Mariah has to think carefully about it for a moment first. "Star, I know you don't want to hear this, but I am quite sure that your power will always be connected to Graham. Your joining is what initially controlled it within you. Otherwise, the barn would have collapsed on you both. But I sense now that his body is also acting like an antenna, an amplifier, for want of a better word, that is needed near you to give you full power again."

"Oh great! You mean I have to fuck him constantly?" Star asks in mock horror.

"No, I don't think so," Mariah laughs. "Sex is definitely part of it, but I'm guessing that if he is truly your amplifier, then just being near him will make a difference. Joining again will probably make a house fly, but his presence will make that pencil fly."

"Well, I guess I better forget about the pencil too," Star snorts. "I'm not about to get within a hundred feet of him after what I did to him. Easy come, easy go."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Almost three weeks since she's left the country ... - OH GAIA NO! - she wakes from a dream of being pregnant. Star has had many dreams of babies and the Hess children recently, but never one of actual pregnancy. Running to look at a calendar, she realizes in horror that she's several days late for her usually regular period.

- But I always use a diaphragm! Every time! .. Ohhhhh nooooo!! - And she remembers now the night of her birthday that she didn't have one in, because she hadn't had actual sex since her last menstrual period, just before Merrill went out of town. - He was a little squeamish because of the blood, but I convinced him it was OK. I even used my diaphragm to be on the safe side. Then he was out of town for a couple days, and I fell on the rock and went in the hospital, and we never had real sex again! -

Looking at the calendar again and counting the days, she realizes now that the night of her 30th birthday, the night Mariah drew the fertility symbols on her, is the night that she was most likely ovulating. - If I'm pregnant, it's gotta be Graham's! No, I have to stay calm. Nothing is perfect. Diaphragms are far from perfect. Women CAN get pregnant during their period. Sure it's unlikely, but it can still happen. And if that's the case, then there's still a chance it could be Merrill's! It IS possible it's Merrill's! Oh Gaia, please don't do this to me .... Not Graham! -

An hour later, Star is back from the drug store fearfully reading the results of a home pregnancy test ..... positive. She very much wants to call Mariah for help, but knowing what the woman will say, that it's another sign, a sign to choose Graham as her life mate, she decides to wait for a while until she's absolutely sure what she wants to do about it. There are several choices she can make, keep the baby and raise it alone, give it up for adoption, or have an abortion.

No force on earth will make her tell Graham about the pregnancy. Star may have enjoyed tormenting him in the past, but she truly feels that this is one torment no one else should have to be made to bear, since, as far as she is concerned, the child's ultimate fate is in her hands, not his. - Besides, it COULD be Merrill's, - she keeps trying to remind herself. - Why tell Rev when there's a remote chance I'm wrong and got pregnant during my period through the diaphram .... Gaia! Even I know how lame that sounds! -

To help keep her mind off her predicament, she goes back to work for Tony, who is so happy to have her back in the city that she lets him take her out to dinner and the movies a few times. The man seems so changed from being away from her for a few weeks, that, after having fun with him like she used to, she eventually breaks down and lets him kiss her, just a little.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RING! Graham immediately picks up the kitchen wall phone. Every time that it's rung the last three weeks, he's jumped. Merrill isn't home, and he can't stop himself, a strange feeling has hit his stomach, as he breathes anxiously this time, "Star?"

There is no reply, only a buzzing tinkling kind of sound, like nothing Graham has ever heard before. The sound is so unreal, that it reaches down and flutters over his soul in a way that makes him tremble with a touch of both unease and joy. "Colleen?" he whispers into the phone, listening to his heart.

"She needs you," a woman's voice says before the line disconnects.

The phone is dropped in shock, and recognizing his wife's voice, he slides down to the floor with his hands cupped over his face, trying not to cry. At that moment, Merrill walks in, and Graham jumps to his feet, "Merrill! Someone called. I think Star is in trouble! I want you to call her NOW!"

The intense look on his brother's face prompts no questions from Merrill, who quickly complies, but receives no answer from Star. Leaving a message on her machine, he shrugs his shoulders now. "You think I should go to the city?"

"Yes," is the instant answer. "I'll go with you. Right now. Something is wrong." And within the hour, he has a sitter at the house and they're off driving to Philadelphia.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Their first stop is at the team office, but with no one around to speak with, they next head to her apartment. By now, Graham is fighting a feeling of sheer panic at not being able to locate her, and they are just about to leave her building and begin checking local hang-outs when they run into Tony.

"Merrill?" he says. "You back in town now? Team's not ready yet."

"I know. I'm here to see Star. Know where she is?"

Tony looks from Merrill to Graham and back again. "Who's that?"

"My brother. We're in a hurry, Tony. Where's Star?"

"Ohhh, the brother who's the preacher, the farm in the country?" Tony nods now, looking at Graham again.

"That's right," Graham says quietly and steps closer to Tony, knowing that he's the man Star used to date and was once worried about. "Is there a problem?"

Tony, not used to people trying to intimidate HIM, automatically backs up a step. "No problem. She's probably at her other job."

"What other job?" Graham demands.

"Ohhh, you'll see," Tony smiles. "Follow me. It's where I first met her."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few blocks away, they enter a very different area. - Hookers?! - Graham realizes, although the area is not exactly dirty and seedy, it is definitely a meat market, no matter how upscale and business-like it appears on the outside. A wide-eyed Merrill and very angry Graham follow Tony into a fairly normal looking club, but once inside, Graham blinks in astonishment and lets out his fury. "She's a stripper?" he shouts at Merrill.

"I didn't know!" Merrill cries. "She never told me!"

"Not a stripper, boys," Tony grins. "Exotic dancer. Makes very good money. Now sit down and enjoy the show."

Merrill doesn't need to be told twice. He eagerly grabs a seat next to Tony while Graham, acting as though his own seat is diseased, hesitantly follows suit. Two pretty girls come out on stage and begin their routine, slowly stripping down to only their g-strings. Recognizing Tony as a regular customer and the slight nod of his head, they soon realize he is silently asking them to tease the two men with him. Happily, they oblige, knowing there will be a big tip in it for them later. Merrill shows earnest excitement on his face, as they dance and move close to, but not quite, touching them, but the only emotion shown on Graham's face is disgust.

"How about a lap dance, Rev?" Tony laughs, as he guzzles down a beer. "Maybe that'll put a smile on your face."

In response, Graham moves his seat back from the table to stand up.

"Leave now and you'll miss the best part, Star's show. She really gets the crowd going. Even got ME to notice her and want her .... for the team."

"No way I'm missing this, Graham," Merrill shakes his head at his brother.

"She's your girlfriend," Graham snaps back at him. "How can you just sit there and let her do this?"

"Hey! As much as I'd LIKE to think she's my girlfriend, she's her own woman. You know her now. Can't stop her from doing what she wants."

"Yes, that's for sure," Graham mutters and pulls his seat back to the table.

"Ladies and Gentlemen!" a loud voice rings out from the stage. "The Heaven's Delight Lounge is proud to announce the return of ..... Star Power!"

Star whirls out onto the stage in a full red, white and blue leather and lace body suit. Only seconds pass, though, before she feels a heated tremor run through her, and in mid-dance almost stumbles when her eyes lock onto Graham's. - Oh no! Gaia protect me! -

The tremor flares brightly between them, and the small neon-colored American flags she uses in her routine, flags that are set strategically around the stage for her to pick up, suddenly fly through the air and ripple around her. All but one in the audience begins gasping loudly, Star included, but she manages to keep to her routine, as the flags caress around her body, and she slowly removes pieces of the body suit in time to the music.

By the time she is down to her halter and thong, people are speculating in awe at the amazing trick wires or magnets that must have been used to pull off such an illusion, as only Star and Graham know the truth, and Star has carefully kept herself from looking at him since that first lightning moment of recognition.

Soon, the audience is clapping wildly, men are throwing money on the stage for her helper to retrieve, and Star smiles brilliantly before sliding back from where she came, completely emotionally drained now. "WOW!" Tony exclaims. "She was always good, but THAT was fucking amazing!"

For once, Merrill has been stunned into silence. And Graham, well, he's had quite enough. That filthy display, as he considers it, did nothing more than anger him even more, and he heads to the doorway leading back stage. The bouncer, however, does his job well and is not about to let anyone pass unless they pay big cash for a private dance by Star. - Private dance?! Lord, I'm going to KILL her! -

A thoughtful glance over at the table, he can see that Merrill is caught up again in watching the regular strippers, but Tony is openly watching him back, interested. The man smiles, giving Graham a 'thumbs-up' sign, while wondering to himself why the preacher would care about going back stage but not her apparent 'boyfriend.'

- I don't care what he thinks! - Graham huffs to himself, as he hands over the money. - I need to talk to her alone, and if this is the only way, so be it! -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Star is told that a customer is waiting for her, and she considers refusing the dance. She doesn't know it's Graham, but she just isn't feeling up to dancing again. - Don't know how much longer I'll be able to dance if I keep this pregnancy. It's gonna wear me out before I even start showing! Damn, I gotta sneak outta here so Rev doesn't see me! I'll catch up with Tony tomorrow and find out why they're in town. -

"Hey Dave," she tells the bouncer. "Tell the guy I'm not interested."

Less than five minutes later, the bouncer is back. "Guy said he's a big fan of yours. Gave me twice as much."

- Shit! Haven't danced in weeks. Really do need the money now. Especially if I'm gonna keep this kid. Better do it while I can. Quickie dance for all that cash ... can't pass it up. - It never even once crosses her mind that Merrill or Graham would do something like this. It may have been the way she met Tony, but Merrill and Graham are nothing like him, and Star is easily picturing the three of them all sitting out front waiting patiently for her to walk out into the main area like normal after a show.

"Fine, I'll be right there, Dave," she sighs, wearily takes off her robe and walks into the small darkened room wearing only her thong and halter from the stage.

Graham is sitting silently, his face in shadows, as she begins to dance slowly around him, carefully leaning just close enough so that her backside barely brushes a hint against him, knowing she will most likely get a good tip for it. It's easy money; tease the guy with the lightest of touches and they usually cum in their pants.

Unfortunately for Star, even the lightest of touches is enough for these two now, and the moment she makes actual contact for even that split second, she knows. Graham has also felt the strange flare burst between them, much more than just the sudden tightness in his groin, and before she can even turn around in surprise, he's pulled her firmly into his lap.

"Let me go," she immediately struggles, knowing she can scream for instant help, but also knowing it will damage her reputation at the club if she is the cause of a customer commotion.

"Why?" he growls in her ear. "I paid for you. Isn't that how it works?"

"You know damn well it isn't like that!" she pulls against him. "No real contact allowed!"

"How would I know?" he tightens his arms even more around her. "I'm just a stupid country boy. A country boy with a carving on my chest now!"

A sudden laugh. "Heal good for ya, Rev? Getcha off good looking at it?"

"Why don't we find out?" he growls and pushes himself up against her ass, eliciting soft moans from them both.

Although her body immediately grinds down on him for more, Star still manages to ask through gasping lips, "What do you want?"

And fighting the urge not to bury his face into her neck, he gasps back; pushing his hips up again, "Got a phone call. Heard you needed help."

"What?" she asks startled, trying to pull away once more. "No one would call you!" - I haven't told ANYONE about the baby! -

"Don't know who it was," he partially lies, still not wanting to completely believe that it could truly have been his dead wife. - WHY in the name of God would Colleen want me to help Star? They're worlds apart! It doesn't make sense! -

"Well, I don't need help!" she cries indignantly. "Especially from YOU! Go home and take Merrill with you!"

"Fine," he grunts angrily now and shoves her off him.

Unfortunately, Star was pulling so hard to get away as he pushed, she stumbles and falls hard onto the floor. In a flash, Graham is standing, holding his hand down to help her, wanting to apologize too although just not quite able to bring himself to say the words.

It wouldn't have mattered if he had. Glowering at him, not at all hurt except for her dignity, she quickly jumps to her feet on her own and looks over at the doorway at hearing a new noise. Merrill and Tony have just walked in. Seeing them, a rush of blood hits her head, and soundlessly Star faints, right into Graham's arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Very soon, she finds herself slowly waking up in a hospital bed to the faint sound of someone saying, "Only the father allowed with her right now until she's alert."


CHAPTER 15

"WHAT?" all three men shout loudly, waking Star up even more.

"Didn't you know?" the doctor looks to each of them, seeing only shocked expressions and realizing what a mistake he's just made.

"Oh boy, I'm sorry," he says. "But your friend is pregnant, very early. Probably why she fainted. Her vitamin levels are down. I'm betting she doesn't eat much. We'll release her tomorrow, but whoever the father is, he's got to get her to start eating better, and no smoking or drinking if she's into that." And with that startling announcement, the doctor quickly retreats down the hallway.

"It must be mine!" Merrill is quick to exclaim.

"Well it's NOT mine!" from Tony. "Been months since I fucked her."

Graham doesn't say a word. He's simply in too much shock, unable to ignore his soul resounding with a very strong feeling that HE is the father. - The mother of my child, practically a stripper? A Wiccan? My brother's girlfriend? How much more Lord?? Why am I being punished? For coveting another man's woman? For letting my wife die in my foolish anger? Why suffer an innocent child to a woman like her for MY mistakes? -

"I'm gonna be a father," Merrill grins proudly.

"Illegitimate," Graham rubs his face, muttering now something about life's unfairness.

"Figures that would be the first thing you'd think of, Rev," Star snaps, and they all look over to her.

"I'll talk to you later," Tony nods and leaves the room.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Merrill asks, as he walks up to her bedside

A quick glance at Graham's emotionless face, and she answers him the best way she can. "Needed some time, time to decide what I wanted to do. What do YOU think I should do, Rev?" she can't help but ask the man responsible for this.

Graham fixes his eyes on her, angry now. "What does it matter what I think? You'll just do the opposite, I'm sure."

"Yup," Star laughs. "Ya finally got something right, Rev."

"Well, I don't care what anyone thinks," Merrill says. "So what if it's illegitimate in the making. Doesn't have to stay that way."

- Oh God, Merrill! Don't! - Graham wants to scream, his soul bursting, struggling to let loose, warring with his civilized mind that is brimming with fear, anger and the worse . shame.

"We can get married! Graham can marry us, Star! If you'll have me, that is," he cries before Graham can find the right words to stop the insanity.

Merrill is looking at Star with so much love, and she glances again at Graham, whose eyes have begun to bulge, his face turning red and his mouth clenching so tight now that she can see the man's about to explode. - Look at him! Furious that his brother would marry me! Fucker doesn't think I'm good enough for his perfect little family and town! Gaia, I know my body craves him, but I sure as hell don't! And yeah, I know I've been missing something since we fucked, something to do with my lack of power now like Mariah said, so maybe I should just marry Merrill? At least then I'd be near Graham. Feel strong again. What a fucking rush that was that night! So why not? I like Merrill. And my stupid body will get Graham's strength on the side! No one will know! And who knows? Maybe that's what those signs were pointing to all along. Get pregnant by one of'em and live on the farm as Merrill's wife. Makes a helluva lot more sense than marrying a fucking control freak of a minister. !
I can even keep working when I want. Merrill will never stop me. Gaia, I can't imagine marrying Graham. We'd always be fighting! Merrill loves me like I am. It's the logical choice. -

"Sure Merrill," she smiles. "A country wedding is cool to me."

- Noooooo! - Graham is trying with all his might not to faint at hearing her acceptance of Merrill's proposal. Only the sudden itching of the scarring on his chest is keeping him upright, and as his hand creeps up to scratch it, Star watches with a smirk on her face.

While she and Merrill continue talking, he slips from the room to find the doctor and soon has pinpointed as close as he can which week she probably conceived. Knowing from what a worried Merrill had mentioned one evening that Star's headaches were keeping them from being intimate, he realizes now with certainty that he is indeed most likely the father. For a moment, the Minister of God is not entirely sure if he wants to cry in shame or sing with pride at this confirmation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eventually, when Merrill leaves to find food for him and Graham, he purposely stays behind to talk to her. "You did this on purpose, to trap my brother, didn't you?" he quickly accuses her.

"Oh yeahhh, that's right. I just SO badly wanna marry an out of work ball player. I think you're forgetting, my future brother-in-law, that YOU came looking for ME."

"Then don't marry him! Stay in the city and give the baby up to a good home."

"Really Rev?" she looks at him closely. "That's what YOU want me to do? Give up this baby? You'll never see it?"

"Noooo," he looks away, moaning softly at the reality of never seeing his child. "I don't . I ..I just don't want Merrill to be hurt."

"Not gonna hurt him," she says gently now. "You marry us like he wants. He'll never know."

"That it's mine?" Graham practically whispers.

No spoken answer comes, but her eyes tell him the truth, and they stare at each other in so much anguish, pain, anger, regret, and maybe, just maybe .... something more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning the three are riding back to the country together, as Merrill talks about weddings and babies, Star carefully nods and smiles at all the right places, and Graham silently drives, his hands clenched so tight on the wheel that they've turned white from his grip.

The kids are thrilled to see her again, and she hugs and kisses them with tearful abandon. - Oh Bo! Morgan! I wish I hadn't had to leave before. I missed you so much! -

Not long after she's unpacked once again in the spare room, Merrill begins to push for a wedding date. He's not particularly concerned for himself, but he IS worried about what people will think for his family's sake if Star starts showing signs of pregnancy before they're married.

Graham, of course, knows that people can count, and there is no way they will be able to hide the baby's due date to keep the sin of pre-marital sex out of gossip. Although he wishes they would NEVER get married and compound, in his eyes, that sin even more, he does honestly appreciate his brother's discretion in trying to at least keep up appearances like most people in this county do.

It's soon decided between Merrill and Star that they will marry in two weeks, and before long the entire town knows. The county area women-folk love weddings, even quick ones obviously meant to hide a pregnancy, and faster than anyone can say, 'something borrowed something blue', they've put together a bridal shower in the church's basement to welcome the newest member of their community.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Graham is working in his office there, trying hard but failing not to listen through the vents in the wall, as the women below him giggle and question bride-to-be Star on every little thing she will tell them about the Hess men. The older women, frowning, just sit back in their uncomfortable church chairs and let the younger ones talk, knowing that bridal showers often turn this way and there is very little to be done about it.

"Oh yeah," Star laughingly assures them, forgetting that she is with a different sort of women. "Merrill's great in bed. No complaints there." - Except he's not Graham .. shit. Give it up, Star. No one's gonna be like Graham was. -

"So, the rumors are true?" one of the gray-hairs asks. "You are with child?"

- Ooooops! - Star realizes her mistake now. - Fuck it! In for a penny, in for a pound. Sex is NORMAL! Let'em fucking talk! They'll know in eight months anyways! -

"Sure am!" she grins. "And we're VERY happy about it." - Well, Merrill is at least. -

Upstairs, a pencil snaps in half in Graham's hand. - LORD! WHAT is wrong with her?! -

The younger women are giggling at the city woman's willingness not to hide something they know that happens all the time, even in their small town, but the others are just nodding their heads sadly, sure now that their minister has lost control of his wayward brother, who will surely go to hell for this sin.

Graham doesn't feel this way, of course. The man is quite sure that if anyone is going to go to hell, it will be him. He has never committed so many sins in his entire adult life since meeting Star. - The three L's, - he thinks wearily. - Lying, Lust, and Laying out of wedlock . I'm doomed! -

All the ladies perk up, however, when Star is eventually asked if she's ever accidentally seen Reverend Hess without clothes. "Oh yeah, sure, all the time," she laughs and makes up a story, as Graham snaps yet another pencil in half. "He often just walks right outta the shower naked. Not a care in the world if I'm in the hallway."

"Is he b ..?" one of them starts to ask with wide excited eyes, as they ALL lean closer to Star for more details on this particular subject.

"STAR!" Graham interrupts her, racing down the stairs into the room, his face flushed with anger. "I need to talk to you RIGHT NOW!"

"Ummm OK, Rev," she grins, realizing he must have over-heard somehow. "Just telling these ladies what a wonderful host you've been at the house to me."

His hands fly to his head in frustration, and he backs out of the room as she follows him, trying not to laugh. "Stop it right now," he warns her, pushing her into a corner away from the women.

"Stop what?" she bats her eyes, trying to look innocent.

"Stop joking around with these people. Bo and Morgan have to live here too."

"You're right. I'm sorry," she looks down, feeling a little bad now. "I wasn't thinking."

"Do you ever?" he snaps, not particularly feeling very Christian-like about forgiving anymore with her. - I bet a great big hellhole would open up right under me if I wring her neck in church! -

"Well, why should I bother? Isn't that what YOU'RE good for? Thinking? That's all you ever do! Think for everyone! You wouldn't know how to just ACT if your life depended on it!"

"Yes I do," his voice lowers with resolution, as he walks away. "I had a good teacher, you, but you'll never see it again."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day, Star makes another mistake. "No, haven't gotten around to calling a doctor yet. Wasn't sure if I was even gonna keep the baby at first." - But I knew I would, just needed to think it out. -

"WHAT?" Graham shouts, raging inside that the woman would have even considered terminating this pregnancy, his child.

"Graham," Merrill quickly tries to intercede. "She didn't do it, just forget it."

"That's not the point!" he glares only at her. "You know how I feel about this issue!"

"Yes, I do!" she screams at him, as she slams her bedroom door on both men. "And you got what you fucking wanted!"

"You're seeing the doctor tomorrow!" Graham shouts through the door, as Merrill nods his head in agreement.

"Shi .. shoot Graham," he suddenly realizes. "I can't take her tomorrow. I've got to work a day shift."

"Don't worry," Graham mutters. "I'll get her there if I have to hog-tie her."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Just drop me off and come back in an hour," she tells him that next day in town.

"I don't THINK so," he says firmly, staring at the road ahead of him. "If Merrill can't be in there with you, I will." - Don't trust her! A woman who would consider abortion needs a strong hand to make sure she does what the doctor says! I'm not taking ANY chances with MY child! -

"Fine," she slumps in the seat, tired of fighting with him all the time.

The doctor, the Hess family general practice doctor who has met Star twice now with Graham, takes one look at Star sitting on the examining room table and Graham standing beside her .. and knows.

"Merrill can't make it?" he asks for want of not knowing what else to say.

"Not this time. I'm standing in," Graham answers, not missing the strange look on his doctor's face and knowing now that they won't be able to fool him.

"OK then," he says and starts going down the prenatal list of the 'dos and don'ts' of pregnancy with Star. "I see here your vitamin levels are down. You need to eat more and take a supplement from now on."

Graham nods and smirks at Star, as it has been a constant battle with her to eat better since he found out.

"And no drinking or smoking," the doctor continues, as Star whines now about losing her cigs and Graham's smirk turns even wider.

"What about sex?" she asks.

"No reason to stop. With a healthy normal pregnancy, you and Gr.. Merrill can have sex right to the end."

"Well THAT'S good," she snorts, as Graham rolls his eyes and looks away.

"Now put this on, and I'll be right back to take a look at you." And he steps out the door, purposely holding it open for Graham to follow.

A few minutes later, Graham is waiting anxiously outside the room while the doctor examines his new patient. And when he's through with the internal, he decides to check with Graham out of long time friendship and respect. "Going to do an ultrasound now. Would you like to come back in? Chance to see your .... niece or nephew."

Immediately, Graham is at her side again, and they both watch with wonder at the beating heart on the screen. For just a moment, they glance softly at each other, a look the doctor studiously pretends not to notice, and then the entire exam is over and they're heading home.

"Aren't you glad you didn't kill our baby now?"

"OUR baby?" she shouts in quick defense. "You mean MY baby! And Merrill's!"

Once again with her, the brakes are slammed. "I may be called Uncle Graham soon, but it will ALWAYS be MY baby, and I'll be damned if I'm going to let you have an unhealthy pregnancy."

"Damned?" she looks out the side window. "I think you already are."

"I know," he sighs and starts the car again.

CHAPTER 16


"People are really talking now," Graham states to them one night after the kids have gone to bed.

"I know," Merrill laughs and jokes, "The only thing saving me from a lynching is getting married next week."

"Star," Graham asks suddenly. "Do you have anything special you want done for the wedding?"

"No, nothing," she sighs. "Unless we can do it outside in a field instead of in a church."

Two sets of male eyes turn to look at her as though she were crazy to suggest such an idea. "That's what I thought," she sighs again.

"Are your . ummm, friends coming for it?" Graham asks. "Oh great," he slaps his knees at her nod. "They'll be lighting candles and incense in my church."

A sharp look from Merrill to Star, and she laughs now. "Yeah, Merrill. He knows I'm Wiccan."

"It's not witches," Merrill interjects quickly, hoping to head off another argument. He's known about Star's beliefs for a while now, but has never found the courage, or even a real reason, to bring it up to Graham.

"Yes, I know," Graham answers wearily. "I've done research. I'd prefer, though, if you didn't invite them. They won't fit in." - And they saw me at my weakest! Humiliated by her in the barn! I don't want to see any of them ever again! -

"And I'd prefer to get married outside, not in a restricting building filled with hypocrites!"

Shaking with fury at being called a hypocrite, Graham rises to his feet, although he can't deny what is true. With a huff, he walks out onto the porch, waving down Merrill, who rose to follow him.

- Merrill may follow directions like a fucking dog, but I don't - she decides and follows Graham outside while Merrill watches from the window. "I'm getting married like everyone wants, in your church like everyone wants, but I'll kiss your god's ass first before I let you keep my friends from being there, Rev."

Turning on her, he snaps in frustration, "I don't particularly want my church brought down on my congregation by a bunch of freaks!"

SMACK! The porch chair swing knocks him in the back of the legs, as though by an unfelt gust of wind.

"See? You're a freak!" he yells, moving out of the way before it can hit him again. "And YOUR baby will be a freak too!"

So completely furious, herself, unafraid, Star steps right up to him, also knowing that no matter what, she is safe with Merrill watching, although the man is unlikely to overhear them. "I may be a freak, Rev, but don't forget what this freak is capable of." And she pushes her palm up hard against his shirt, directly over the mark, turns on her heels and walks back into the house.

"I'm going home!" she shouts, heading up the stairs to pack. "Wedding's off, Merrill. You wanna see the baby, come to the city."

"WHAT? WHAT?" he cries in bewilderment. "Graham! Help me! Do something! Don't let her go!"

"I don't care what she does," Graham shakes his head from the doorway. "And if you were thinking with your head, you wouldn't care either."

While the men move onto the porch and begin their biggest argument to date about her, Star sneaks out the back door with her bags, Graham's car keys from the hook in the kitchen, and peels out of the driveway by the side of the house. "STAR!!!" they both jump off the porch, racing after her. In response, she rolls down the window, flips them the finger and roars away into the night.

Driving a stolen car, her thoughts turn to the possibility of the police coming after her. But luck, or something, is with Star this time, as Graham is not at all willing to bring any more scandal onto his family than has already been brought upon them, and he has already made the firm decision that he will take matters into his own hands.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, after trying to reach her with no answer by cell or regular phone, Merrill has to work again, and Graham hires a sitter for the day in order to take the bus to the city with his spare set of car keys. His car is quickly found right outside her apartment, and he storms into the building to bang on her door. "STAR! LET ME IN! IT'S GRAHAM! LET ME IN RIGHT NOW!"

The landlady, hearing his shouts and banging, approaches Graham warily. "She left this morning with Tony."

With this news, Graham thanks her and heads directly to the team office. This time, a secretary is found, who immediately calls Tony's cell and home for him, but with no answer, Graham is left to race to the club, the only other place he knows of where they may have gone.

When nothing comes out of that too, it's off to a motel for the night to consider what he should or shouldn't do next. - At least I got my car back. That's what I came for. What difference does it make if she's off with Tony somewhere? She's out of our lives. I should be grateful. Merrill and the kids will get over her. I'll go home in the morning ... I guess. - And after assuring Merrill on the phone that he tried as hard as he could to find her, he goes to bed early, and tries, without success, to sleep.

RING! He picks up the phone on the first ring, assuming that it must be Merrill, but hears only that strange tinkling sound again. "Colleen?" tears come to his eyes. "Please talk to me." But the noise stops, and all that's left is the dead sound of a dial tone. Graham has no desire to hold them back this time, and freely he lets the tears run down his face, as he slowly hangs up the phone. - Dear God, please help. Colleen is trying to tell me something, something about Star ... Mariah! Maybe she can help! But how do I find her? - Any previous thoughts Graham may have had about never wanting to see those 'freaks' again are completely forgotten now thanks to that phone call.

KNOCK! KNOCK! He opens his door to see a very worried Mariah. "Reverend Hess," she deliberately gives him the respect of his title. "I was in bed trying to sleep when I had a strong vision you were here and needed help. Are you looking for Star?"

"Yes," he says very forcibly. "Where is she?"

"I don't know," Mariah strangely finds herself looking down under his intense gaze, "but I have feeling we can find out together."

"Look," he says now with a faint hesitation in his voice. "I know you're not really a witch, but that's what you're going to do, right? Some kind of weird thing?"

"How badly do you want to find her? The mother of your child."

"Very badly," he replies, not bothering to question how she knows the truth. "I think she's in trouble."

"Then don't close your mind to what we will do. Meet me at Star's home. I have a spare key. You might find your answer there."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Opening the door to Star's apartment, they discover an overturned chair and a very small amount of what may be blood on the hardwood floor. Carefully, Graham brings a drop close to his face. "Is it hers?" Mariah asks.

"How would I know? But I think it IS blood."

"Close your eyes and smell it," the woman instructs him. "I believe you will know."

Looking at her as if she's lost her mind, but having already seen more strange things these last few weeks than ever in his entire life, he hesitantly complies. "Good Lord! It IS hers!"

"And how do you know?" Mariah asks him with a slight smirk.

"I . I don't know," he stammers and looks away.

"Yes, you do."

"I'm calling the police," he blurts suddenly.

"And tell them what? No sign of forced entry. A few drops of blood could mean anything. We have no idea where they are, yet. Star is an adult. They will not help on such little evidence."

"Then what are we doing here?" he cries in exasperation.

"You will see," she says and begins to draw a large circle with chalk on the floor and light candles around it.

"Please remove your shirt and sit in the middle of the circle, Reverend Hess."

"You're going to draw on me?" he asks, seeing her pull out a magic marker like she used on Star in the barn.

"Yes. Problem?" she glances up at him, as she draws a few more symbols within the circle.

"No," he says after only a second's thought. "Go ahead." - I'm sure the scar Star left me won't even faze her! -

He's right. Mariah only smiles a very small secret kind of smile at seeing it. And, within a minute, she is sitting in front of him within the circle, solemnly drawing just one symbol directly over Star's mark, one of the same symbols she drew on Star in the barn.

Looking down, Graham recognizes it. "Isn't that the same ... ? The night we .. ? I couldn't find it in any book."

"Yes," she smiles. "It's an ancient fertility symbol, very powerful. It would not be in any book you would find in the Christian world." And before he can respond, she pulls out a very familiar looking knife.

Graham's body jumps visibly, recognizing it as the knife Star used on him. "Oh no you don't," he warns. - Can I get it away from her without hurting her in the process? -

"Don't worry," Mariah laughs. "I have no need to take your blood like Star did." - Star only did what came natural to her without even thinking about it, marking the true alpha male as hers like any alpha female would.-

Visibly relaxing again, he watches with amazement at how easily the woman slices into her own palm, holds up her hand dripping in blood and moves it towards his chest. "What are you doing?" he simply HAS to ask.

"Star and I and the other women are part of a powerful circle connected to each other through blood from the rituals we perform for Gaia," she tries to explain, not wanting the man to stop something she knows will help her friend.

"Sacrifices?" he gasps. - Heathen blood rituals, death! -

"No," she laughs again. "Just little things like this. Nothing dies." And before he can ask yet another question, she quickly pushes her hand against Star's mark, causing an electric bolt to race through Graham, as he shudders uncontrollably for a moment.

- Oh no! - he suddenly looks down at himself with horror and disbelief, realizing he's become aroused now. It's actually straining against his jeans, and his face begins to turn red with embarrassment at seeing that Mariah has noticed too.

"Don't worry, Reverend Hess," she looks back up at him and smiles reassuringly. "I know you're not wanting for me. It is for Star your body yearns for through the blood of our circle on her mark."

"I don't know why," he mutters with annoyance at his body. "She's nothing like Colleen."

"True," Mariah agrees quietly.

"How do you know? You don't know my wife."

A small cryptic smile flickers, not about to betray Colleen's secret, especially at a time the man is needed calm and controlled. "I have a sense of who she really was. Tell me if this is correct. Colleen fit you like a glove, the perfect beta to your alpha, keeping you in check, soothing you like you wanted to be soothed . tamed."

Graham can't deny it, although he stares at her, appalled, at the type of words she's chosen to describe his marriage so well. "But it was not to last," Mariah continues. "Gaia ... or your god," she adds when she notices a sudden firm look come to his face, "gave you Colleen only temporarily on a journey to another, to an alpha like you. Someone who will not tame you but will bring out your primal maleness completely, make you face what you really are, what you hide behind your collar. A female alpha to stand by your side this time, not a step behind like most females do for their males."

"I never made .," he tries to protest.

"Of course not," Mariah assures him. "It was Colleen's nature, just like it is your nature. That is why it was so soothing for you; safe and content for you both. It was an easy marriage full of much love. This time will be different with Star, just as much love, but not easy."

"Hey! Wait a minute!" he starts to stand up, not particularly liking what is being presumed of his relationship with Star. - I can't love a woman like that! And marriage?! God above won't get me to marry her! -

"SIT," she says it so firmly that Graham actually does.

"I never said anything about wanting to marry Star," he says defensively. "I just want to find her, make sure she's OK . the baby."

Mariah smiles her secret smile again and takes a few drops of the blood from her hand, the sweat from his chest and a drop of Star's blood from the floor to mix it all together with special herbs. She then places the pot on a small burner to warm, and, within a minute, the room is filled with the smell of grass fields and fresh hay. Her eyes close and she murmurs to herself, taking in deep breaths of the country aroma surrounding them. "I see Star. She's scared, powerless without you."

"Where is she?" he struggles to control his voice from shouting.

"Water all around, dark," she intones, reaching forward quickly to press her hand firmly on his chest again .. "NEAR."

"Water? Dark?" Graham stands up, frustrated. "That could mean anything!"

"Don't break the circle," Mariah quickly warns him, seeing the candles flaring brightly around them.

Slowly, she stands beside him, and they both begin peering around the room as though trying to will an answer to appear before them. "What's that?" they hiss together in surprise when something suddenly flutters down from a shelf and lands in the middle of a small basket on the floor.

It's a recent picture of Bo and Morgan, they discover, a picture Graham remembers Star having taken. And looking in the basket together, they see many more pictures; pictures of her and Merrill in the city, the baseball team, her in the country at his house, Bo and Morgan playing in the yard, and her and Tony on a boat .. a large boat.

"We need to call the police."

"And tell them what?" she answers again. "A psychic is leading you to an adult woman that has not even been missing 24 hours? Call them, Reverend. But I live in this city, and they will laugh in your face and tell you to come back in two more days. We don't have time for that. Star needs help NOW."

"You said near. Where would his boat be on water nearby?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Soon they are at the nearest lake, but there are so many boats in the darkness, they can make little out. "How will I know?" he cries in a voice turning frantic now. "They all look alike. This one picture we found doesn't show enough, not even the name of the boat."

"You must trust your instincts, Reverend. Get in that rowboat and close your eyes. Reach out and feel with your soul. Let Gaia lead you to the right one."

Although he shakes his head at her words, it doesn't stop him from gliding out into the dark harbor and closing his eyes, willing to try anything he has to at this point to find her. And there it is, a very subtle pull, so subtle, in fact, that he never would have felt it if Mariah hadn't told him to listen to himself, something he would have normally scoffed at as foolishness under different circumstances.

The pull is reaching from a specific direction, and he opens his eyes and moves as silently as he can to a boat named 'Fortune's Avarice.' There is only one small light on inside, and he carefully climbs on, knowing full well that he is breaking the law now, but not about to stop. At the entrance to the cabin below, he hears what he came for.

"Do it again, you bitch! Make it move!"

"I can't," Star cries. "I've lost it!"

SLAP! Graham hears the sound of flesh hitting flesh and a soft cry from Star, making his heart suddenly grip with pain.

"Make the fucking pencil move, Star!" Tony shouts louder, "or you'll be giving birth in here! I saw what you did at that show. And in the park last night you moved a can of Coke right across that bench. And now you say you can't move a fucking pencil again when you just did it earlier?"

"I'm trying!" she shouts back at him, receiving another slap across the face for her trouble.

Graham has no weapon other than his strength and his faith, and with just a quick glance at the night sky to pray that Star and his baby doesn't get hurt, he kicks in the door. "Get away from her," he snarls and advances on Tony.

Instantly, Tony is backing up, pulling out a knife from his jacket. The wicked blade goes practically unnoticed by Graham, however, as he continues forward, a hunting male intent on his prey UNTIL that prey grabs Star right around the neck, and the blade that was once ignored is now seen as a distinct threat to his female and young.

"Come on Rev. You want your bitch back? Take another step and you can have her dead body. Or," he poises the knife over her stomach, "would you prefer I kill your baby first? .. Don't try to deny it, Rev," Tony sneers at the new look on Graham's face. "Any idiot can see it's your baby."

Graham hasn't made another move since that knife was turned on Star, but Star can practically feel the deep thunder of fury building in the man, about to let loose completely. She's terrified, not just for herself, but for their baby, and she's not about to take any chances in leaving it all up to Graham. - If he explodes, it could get us all killed! I have to do something! -

And she does. In desperation for her baby's life, Star reaches out one last time at the pencil, and it moves .. whipping itself right off the table to bury into the muscle of Tony's neck. A high-pitched shriek comes from the man, and she takes that moment to push herself out of his arms and fall into Graham's. There's no time for an embrace, though, as Graham immediately pushes her up the stairs in front of him, and Tony, still screaming, stumbles up the stairs after them.

He's at the railing, climbing down to his speedboat towards them, then jumping those last few feet, when, suddenly, Star pushes out once more with her mind, and the speedboat moves, leaving Tony to land right into the lake instead. Paddling in the water, he makes a grab onto their rowboat, and Graham and Star both stand, lifting oars in defense. Unfortunately, the small boat begins shaking too much, and Graham yells out, "Sit down!" But it's too late, Star falls straight into the water, right next to Tony.

"Gotcha Bitch!" Tony roars, lets go of the boat and proceeds to try to drown her. His greater physical strength is holding her head under, as she splashes frantically in shock and swallows mouthfuls of lake water.

CRACK! Graham hits Tony across the head with an oar, and the wounded man begins to sink silently beneath the waves along with Star. "STAR!!" Graham screams and dives in, leaving Tony's fate in the hands of God ... or Gaia.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the back of Mariah's car, speeding to the nearest emergency room, Graham huddles with Star, who is breathing but unconscious, trying desperately to dry her skin and keep her warm against his body.

When she wakes the next morning, the first person she sees is Merrill, who came on the last bus the minute Graham called him from the hospital.

*********************

"Why are you calling him?" Mariah had asked Graham.

"Because I have to. He loves her . the baby .,"

"is yours," Mariah finished for him. "Just like Star is."

Graham's mouth had opened to deny it, but he looked at the floor and said quietly, as though he needed to convince himself he had to too, "I'm calling him."

*********************

But now, Graham is beginning to regret that decision when Star looks right past Merrill to ask HIM, "The baby?"

"Is fine," they both answer at the same time.

"Make that babies . twins," the doctor walks in, smiling.

CHAPTER 17

Everyone, even the women, looks at the doctor in shock. "Twins?" Graham whispers, feeling a surge of enormous pride thundering through him.

"You do know," the city doctor continues, speaking to Star, "that this means you must relax as often as you can during this pregnancy. No stress and let your husband take care of you."

"I'm not married," she blurts out, still reeling from this unexpected news.

"But we will be," Merrill says with a hopeful look on his face. "Right Star?"

She can't help herself. Her eyes dart to Graham, who has not even heard the last exchange and is still staring at the floor, still trying to digest everything. "Sure Merrill," she tries to smile to hide the strange feeling of disappointment hitting her. "Next week like we planned."

At that, Graham looks up, and a flicker of uncontainable sadness crosses his face at seeing Merrill kiss Star and Mariah stare directly at him with disapproval. With the older woman looking at him in that way, however, making Graham suddenly feel like an errant child, it brings back his anger from just under the surface, and he swiftly leaves the room.

But not for long. As Merrill proceeds to tell Star everything that Graham told him about what happened with Tony in the water, Star becomes visibly upset, tries to get out of bed and calls out, "Graham!" In a flash, Graham is back at her side, forcing her to lie down again. "Merrill said they haven't found Tony's body," she cries up at him, blatant fear shining from her eyes.

"No," he sighs, wishing for all the world he could comfort her the way he really wants to. "It may take days. The police have already questioned me, but they'll be back to talk to you later."

Touching his hand on the bed rail, she can sense that he's also upset about Tony in an entirely different way. "Thank you. You did the right thing hitting him like that."

"Not if I took his life," Graham murmurs and pulls his hand away. "I should have tried something else." As much as a large part of him wanted to kill Tony, tear him apart piece by piece, the man of God in him is praying now to himself that he didn't actually take a life. Graham is just not sure if he can honestly deal with that absolute sin on top of all the other sins he's committed recently.

"But it may not have worked," she says. "I almost died with yo .. my babies."

He may be looking at her fearfully at that thought, the thought of her and the babies dying the ultimate horror, but the minister still feels that he must confess his shame out loud this time. "Maybe God will forgive me," he almost whispers, turning away from her again.

"I know Gaia would," Star says quietly, watching Graham's shoulders tense in response before he sits down by the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The police show up again eventually to finish filling out their reports and assure Star that they will keep looking for Tony's body. Until then, she is told that she should stay somewhere else for her safety, just in case he is still alive. Graham immediately speaks up at that while Merrill nods in agreement. "She's coming home with us. We'll take care of her."

Wanting to protest that she doesn't need taking care of, but after what's just happened and the fact that she is now responsible for TWO new lives, Star, for once, decides not to say anything. Shortly, though, as soon as the police are through, she kicks the Hess men out in order to speak in private with Mariah.

"What?" Star says, seeing the look Mariah is giving her.

"You know, my friend. You are marrying the wrong man."

"What difference does it make?" Star cries, running her hands through her hair in frustration. "I'll be stronger because I'll be near Graham. The babies will be safe. That's all that matters. I HAVE to marry Merrill now. I can't take care of TWO babies on my own! Especially if I'm gonna be looking over my shoulder for Tony the rest of my fucking life!"

"Seduce the minister again," Mariah states the obvious answer calmly. "Make him break free of the restraints he keeps on himself. Make him embrace the alpha within him, as it should be."

"And then what? Marry him? NOT gonna happen. Rev would never marry me even if his Jesus came down from heaven and told him to. Hell, I wouldn't marry HIM!"

"So you will live in his home as his brother's wife? And will you abide by their Christian laws?" Mariah raises her eyebrow questioningly.

"Fuck no!" Star snorts derisively. "Wouldn't want Merrill to find out and get hurt, but if Rev and I DO get it on again, that's fine by me. No fucking way I'm chasing him for it, though! He can come crawling to me!"

The picture coming to Mariah's mind of the minister on his hands and knees makes her laugh, but she truly suspects that something like that will indeed happen if Star remains stubborn and proceeds to marry the weaker male.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day, the three return to the country, and the wedding plans continue for the next week. "Ummm," Graham clears his throat one night. "It's traditional for me to have a pre-marriage counseling session with the prospective bride and groom, but we can just waive it this time if you want."

"Oh no," Star speaks up before Merrill can, smiling wickedly at Graham. "I think it's a good idea. Let's talk."

At the look on her face, Graham is wishing now that he hadn't brought it up, but he reluctantly pulls from his desk a checklist of questions that he always asks the couple before he marries them. "Well, I know you're having premarital sex," he mutters, crossing off a whole section of the list.

"Ummm, any questions about that? he asks, carefully keeping his eyes on the paper.

"About what?" Star tries not to laugh while Merrill looks in shock at his brother, not having realized how personal the questions could be.

"About ... ummm ... errrr ... relations," he finally manages to get the word out and do his job.

"Are you saying YOU know all about relations, Rev?" Star grins at him.

"Relations that are considered appropriate for a Christian family," he specifies with a reddening face.

"Well, we're a HALF Christian family," she snaps. "My half likes wild monkey sex."

Coffee spits out of Graham's mouth, and Merrill starts laughing. "I think I'd like to convert now, Graham."

Shooting an angry look at his younger brother, not at all appreciating the joke, he continues down the list. "Fine," he says coolly. "Sex is obviously not going to be an issue for you."

Seeing that the minister's gone and set himself up again, Star goes in for the kill now. "Sex is NEVER an issue for me, Rev. I see, I take," she laughs and openly moves her hand onto Merrill's thigh.

"Uhhh, yes," he grits his teeth while Merrill smiles happily. "You're both certainly healthy."

And on they go to discuss other marital and child-rearing matters with little emotion until Graham finally brings up ... baptism.

"Not happening," she smirks.

"Wait a minute," he says, confused now. "You said the babies could be raised Christian. Baptism is a big part of our religion."

"I don't care what they're raised on the outside," she huffs. "It won't change what they are inside, from me. My babies can go to your church every Sunday, Rev," her voice lowers to a snarl, "but if I ever see you actually pray over them, I'll bring your fucking church down on your head."

Merrill wisely keeps his mouth shut, but Graham stands, slams the notebook down on the table and threatens in a low even voice, "These are Hess babies. No Hess child is living here unbaptised."

"Fine," she smirks again. "Merrill and I will move out."

"Fine with me," he snaps back. "But m . the babies stay here."

"Nobody's going anywhere," Merrill finally tries to assert himself.

"Shut up!" they both turn to yell at him.

"Sorry Merrill," Graham quickly takes it back, not at all wanting to take his anger out on his brother over something he knows is really between him and Star.

"Look," Merrill says. "Let's worry about details AFTER the babies are born. Can't we just get through the wedding first without you two killing each other?"

"You're right, Babe," Star smiles at him. "I'll kill your brother after the wedding."

"Bitch," Graham snorts so softly in anger that Star and Merrill stare at him for a moment, not quite sure they could have possibly heard him right.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The night before the wedding, Merrill's friends come by to drag him away for a bachelor party, all feeling quite relieved that the minister declined so that they can be free to do all kinds of sinful things without having to endure his stern disapproval.

"Where are you going?" Graham asks Star soon after at seeing her head outside alone.

"None of your business. Go back to your bible," she snaps at him and slams the front door.

It happens. Graham's control finally breaks, and he opens a small kitchen cupboard, reaching way into the back for something he's only touched once before, the night after he buried his wife, a bottle of vodka. It's the night before he's about to marry his brother to the woman he knows he wants but can't have, and he begins drinking straight from the bottle, just like he did that one and only night he let himself completely break down sobbing over Colleen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Star is behind the barn, having lit and placed a small candle on the ground between her legs. It's not long before Graham sees the flicker of light and decides to investigate, not entirely sure that he trusts the woman not to burn down his farm in some pagan ritual.

She is standing nude, her head upturned at the moon, and Graham, still drinking from the bottle, stares at her stomach, just the barest hint of a curve starting when he hears a door close in the driveway. Looking over, he sees Mariah step out of her van, shed her clothes and stand in front of Star, who does not acknowledge her.

"You're getting stronger and stronger every day," she tells Star. "The nearness of the alpha, his babies in you .. It is over-powering even me."

"What are you saying?" Star asks, still looking up.

"I think you know. It is almost time for me to step down."

"Yes, it is," Star agrees. "Are you ready?"

"I am ready for whatever Gaia wants of me and whatever you want of me," she offers softly.

Star doesn't say anything; she can feel her body tingling now. - Have a feeling Graham is near, watching. I bet I could rattle him with something that'll knock his moral ass socks clean off. - "Come closer," she tells Mariah, looking at her friend now. And when Mariah does, she whispers in her ear, "Will you do something for me?"

"Anything Star," Mariah responds instantly.

"Do you want me?" Star asks, looking deeply into the woman's eyes.

"I've always wanted you, but I never sensed that you also enjoy the pleasures of women."

"I don't," Star whispers very quietly. "But I think Graham is watching."

"Ahhhh, I understand," she smiles and immediately drops to her knees in front of Star, kissing and licking firmly at her friend's center, as Star stretches her arms high again and moans softly.

THUNK! Graham drops the now empty vodka bottle. - Lesbians?! Star is a lesbian too?! Dear God above, what next?! -

Power is building within her, wanting desperately to release again, but it won't, not with a woman, and with a frustrated groan, Star gently pushes Mariah away. "Male," she gasps, her body trembling and taking on an otherworldly shine. "I need a male."

"The minister?" Mariah asks hopefully.

"No! He's . he's weak," Star spits angrily. "Next door, there's a kid named Lionel, stares at me. Get him."

"NO!" Graham shouts, stepping out from behind the tree.

CHAPTER 18

He almost stumbles, at first, in his drunkenness, but nothing on earth or in heaven will stop this man from keeping another man from touching Star. It's tearing him apart enough as it is with his brother, although, at this point, Graham is not even thinking of it as stopping his brother's fiancée from cheating on him, he is only thinking of it as protecting what belongs to him and no other. An urgent call he cannot ignore.

At seeing Graham stalk over to deny Star another male, Mariah immediately leaves the property. - The alpha may be drunk, but Star is safe from him. No matter how much the rage consumes him, he will never desire to truly harm her now that she is carrying his children. -

Star is still looking at the sky, pointedly ignoring Graham, who has come up behind her to put out the candle. "Go away, Rev," she says, smelling the liquor on him. "I need a real man right now. You're drunk."

"Yes I am," he agrees. "And you're a goddamned whore."

Before she can even complete a swing around at him, he's pushed her to the ground onto her hands and knees, his hand squeezing on the back of her neck to hold her in place. "Now who's in control?" he growls, swiftly dropping to his knees behind her and unzipping his pants with one hand. "Maybe I should carve something on YOU to prove it."

"You wouldn't dare!"

"Don't push me, Star. Until I met you, I had no idea what I was capable of. If I'm going to hell now, I may as well go all out first." And into her from behind he shoves himself, ramming it in just like he's imagined doing to her in his tortured dreams; a way he's never felt the need to do to a woman before.

The very moment their bodies join again, they both cry out loudly and Star's power flares, snapping a fence post clean in half nearby. Although her body may be wanting, though, the man has put her in such a submissive position that the alpha within Star can't help but fight the pleasure and continue trying to get away. In response, his hand tightens on her neck while his other hand grips securely onto her hip, keeping his woman in place, so he can thrust rapidly in a way that is both foreign but strangely natural to him.

The pure animal instinct in Graham, that Star has released from captivity, may be wondering why it is using the female again, as it knows it's seed has already been planted and taken root, but the man in Graham knows only that it needs desperately to lay claim to this woman again, once more before she is given to another.

Although Star has begun to moan loudly with him, she continues trying to pull away, and Graham knows, even through his drunken haze, that he shouldn't be doing this, that she is not 100% willing yet. Unfortunately, remembering how she kept him tied in the barn brings out that particular fury in him all over again, and he can't stop himself from taking it out on her, slamming harder and harder to pay her back in some way for what she did to him.

Surprisingly to Star, the force of his desire is bringing about her complete surrender now, a sheer male strength she's never felt before in a partner, and hearing those wild grunts and groans from this one specific man is actually starting to please her in a way she never would have thought imaginable. So much so, in fact, that she begins to push back against him, eagerly meeting each thrust over and over until they come together in a frozen moment of time, screaming in unison into the night.

Once spent, Graham falls heavily onto her back, pinning her to the ground beneath them, and it brings Star right back to her senses. "Get off me, you son of a bitch," she heaves, trying to catch her breath again, as the fire within slowly burns down into embers once more.

"No," he gasps, feeling his own fire finally receding. "Isn't this what you wanted?"

"Bastard," she confirms it to him.

"Tomorrow you'll be Merrill's wife," he grunts into her ear. "Tomorrow I'll be sober. But tonight," he slides out of her to roll her onto her back, "you're mine." And before she can even begin to protest, Graham seals her mouth with an insistent kiss. Latching onto her full lips and swiftly prying them apart, he stabs with his tongue at that wicked sinful tongue of hers, firmly trying to coax her into submitting to him all over again.

She tries to push him off at first, her hands flailing against his shoulders, as she shakes her head. But the kiss is devastating to her, so completely possessive and dominating that she can barely breathe from the power the man is exuding over her. It's a power he never needed to use with Colleen, didn't know he even had, certainly doesn't understand, but, somehow, with Star, it's pouring right out of him and feels perfectly right.

A part of Star is hating that any man would be so forceful with her, but another part of her is needing it so very badly from him and ONLY him that she is just about ready to surrender again to his will. Unfortunately, just before she can complete that surrender, her mouth opens wider on it's own not in pleasure but in pain, crying loudly against his mouth as sharp agony lances through her abdomen. Her own power, only knowing that a male is holding her down while she is in pain, instinctively lashes out in defense, and scratch marks appear on their own on Graham's face.

"Son of a!" Graham almost swears, as he jumps up and wipes blood from his torn face in shock.

The moment he sees Star clutching her stomach, however, he completely forgets his own pain. "Help me, please," she cries, as she rolls over onto her side.

"Oh my God! No!" he shouts in terror, quickly pulls his pants up and lifts her in his arms into the house.

After a frantic phone call to the doctor, he is told to bring her to the ER immediately, as she may be miscarrying . confirming Graham's worse fear. "MORGAN! BO!" he screams up the stairs. "GET IN THE CAR NOW!"

Instantly, the children race down the stairs in their nightclothes, and with Star, naked but wrapped in a blanket now, they are all rushed to the hospital, where his doctor meets them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The kids stay huddled together in worry in the waiting room while the doctor examines Star in front of Graham. She is shaking in pain on the table, trying not to cry as Graham holds her hand, gently rubbing his fingers against hers in a futile effort to calm them both. "Where's Merrill?" the doctor asks him.

"At his bachelor party. Is she going to lose my babies? .. I mean . never mind."

"There's nothing we can do now," the doctor says, realizing that Graham just accidentally confirmed his suspicion. "I gave her something to help her sleep. She'll hold them or she won't. I'm sorry."

"Why? What happened?" Graham looks up at the man in disbelief, the thought of losing his children, unbearable.

"She had sex," and he gives Graham and his scratch-marked face a very disappointed look. "Very roughly I would imagine from the examination I just gave her."

"YOU FUCK!" Star pulls her hand from his and tries to sit up. "YOU did this! If they die, it's YOUR fault!"

"Lay still, Star!" the doctor orders, as he and Graham hold her down again.

"I . I didn't know," Graham cries, looking back and forth between them. "Colleen was pregnant twice, and we didn't have to stop having relations."

"I know," the doctor nods with a touch of sympathy now. "I thought Star's pregnancy was normal too, but that second baby was hiding before. With a single baby, sex can be shared right up to the end if the pregnancy is progressing well, but with a twin pregnancy, we usually recommend that couples stop having sex at around five to six months, apparently sooner in this case. There was no way to know ahead of time. But if she does hold the babies, she can't have sex again until after they're born."

"If you touch me again," she glares up at Graham, "I'll fucking kill you." And her hand suddenly grips at his arm, screaming in pain, as they see blood begin to run down her legs.

"HELP HER! Graham shouts in anguish. - Dear God, help her! Help my babies! I'll never touch her again! -

"YOU BASTARD!" she screams at him, as orderlies rush into the room and push her away from Graham, quite obvious to everyone now that their town minister is part of the problem.

He's trying to follow them, only thinking of his need to be near her no matter what, when the doctor forcibly holds him back. "Stay here, Graham. You're upsetting her too much. I'll be right back."

Hands running through his hair in panicked frustration, he can still hear Star screaming down the hallway. "I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few moments later, the doctor comes back out as promised. "We had to give her a tranquilizer. On top of what I had already given her, she'll be out for a while now."

"The babies?" he asks fearfully.

"Still OK so far. We're monitoring closely. I would advise that you stay away from her until we're sure they're out of the woods."

"I need to do something," Graham begins to pace back and forth. "It's all my fault."

"Graham," his doctor sighs. "I'm not going to tell you that what you did didn't cause this, because it did. But you didn't know. You can't take the blame for this . unless," his voice starts to trail off, not sure how to say it, "those scratch marks .."

"I . I didn't rape her," Graham looks at the floor, trying to convince himself of it too. "I'd never . We were fighting. We're ALWAYS fighting it seems like ... It was rough ... not rape."

"I certainly hope not," the doctor says very quietly. "But that's between you and her . if she presses charges. By the way, in case you didn't know, you reek of alcohol."

"Oh God," Graham sinks in a chair, his face in his hands. "What can I do? Anything I can do to help her .... anything?"

"Have you called Merrill?" the doctor lifts his eyebrow at Graham's suddenly stunned face, assuming correctly that the woman's apparent fiancé hasn't even been thought of yet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh my God! What happened?" Merrill looks back and forth between the doctor and Graham.

The doctor, glancing quickly at Graham, says, "It happens sometimes, especially with a multiple pregnancy. There's nothing we can do but wait. I'm really sorry, Merrill."

"Can I see her?"

"Not yet. She's sleeping now. I'll let you know." And out the door he retreats, not particularly wanting to be around them if the truth comes out now. He may be a family friend, but he is also a man with professional ethics, and he will not be the one to bring something that is none of his medical business out into the light.

"Graham, what the heck happened to your face?"

"Barn cat," he lies, cringing inwardly, knowing he'll never be able to crawl out of the fiery pit now. "It's fine, had it checked already." - How many lies, Dear God, must I tell? -

"You've been drinking."

"Yes," he admits quietly, feeling very thankful when Merrill doesn't bother to pursue it any further.

Merrill has no desire to stir up the reasons for Graham drinking, as he knows his brother did it once after Colleen's funeral and is probably going to keep doing it occasionally in private while he continues to mourn. - If I lost a woman like Colleen, I'd drink too. -

"What was Star doing when it happened?" he asks, trying to make some sense of it.

Sticking as close to the truth as he can, he does his best. "Not really sure. She was outside doing some sort of ritual. Heard her scream for help. I'm so sorry, Merrill."

Merrill is left with no choice but to believe his brother, the most truthful man he's ever known other than their own father. Any other choice, at this point, is just too incomprehensible.

- There's nothing I can do here, - Graham is thinking at knowing Merrill will stay by her side. - She'll just start yelling at me again if she sees me. - "I'm taking the kids home now. Please call me if anything happens ... anything."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The rest of his night is spent wide-awake in the living room, waiting for the phone to ring. When it finally does in the early morning, he immediately answers with a, "How are they all?"

"Great!" Merrill exclaims. "They're fine. Star is resting and the doctor said she could come home later today if she promises to take it EXTREMELY easy from now on. He wants her to spend a few more days in bed. No more night outings in the yard or whatever it is she does out there," he laughs. "You've got to keep an eye on her for me when I'm working, Graham."

"I will," Graham quickly agrees. - If I have to tie her to her bed! -

"And can you marry us next Saturday now?"

"Yes," he answers flatly. "The church is free next Saturday. I'll let everyone know." - Nothing has really changed. She wants to marry him still and hates me now more than ever. -

"Thanks, Graham. Don't know what I'd do without you."

- You wouldn't be about to marry a woman that doesn't really love you, - Graham thinks sadly. - Maybe I should tell him about her telling Mariah to get Lionel? Or would that make him wonder how I could have known that? Start asking questions, that, God help me, I can't answer? -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the hospital that day, Mariah visits Star, and they talk about what happened with Graham. "He took you by force?" she asks, surprised that the minister would actually do that.

"Yes . no . not really. I don't know," Star admits. "Doesn't matter. He almost killed my babies."

"Star, my friend, you know how grateful I am that the children are unharmed, BUT I am also glad that the alpha is finally claiming the primal control that is his by right. He may come around yet and take you as his mate as Gaia wants."

"Shit Mariah! I'm NOT gonna be his MATE! Fucking him a couple times doesn't mean SHIT! I'm sticking with Merrill!"

"You're taking the easy way. You choose Merrill as your mate because you can control him."

"Damn right I can! And ya know what? I could control Graham too if I wanted!" - I think. -

"Really?" Mariah grins. "Prove it."

"Oh no! You're not tricking me! I don't want his hypocrite hands on me ever again! Merrill and I are gonna move out right now!"

"I don't think we should," Merrill says, as he enters the room, having only heard that last part. "Doctor really wants you to take it easy for the rest of the pregnancy, Star. I'm at work either all day or all night five days a week. We can move out after the babies are born when I take a good long leave of absence."

- Doc warned me not to do anything strenuous in any way until they're born. Moving into a new home while Merrill has to work would definitely be strenuous. When the babies come Mariah said she'd stay with us for a few weeks if I need help. And if I take her up on her offer, then I'll be able to help Merrill with the move, and then we won't need that bastard Graham for any help at all. - "OK Merrill. The minute these babies are born, we're out."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Soon they're home again, and the moment she walks in the door, Graham's mouth opens to say something, but the glare from her is so sharp that it slices through his heart to the core, and he quickly looks down in shame, mumbling a, "Glad everything is better," as he walks away.

A change is made upstairs. After Merrill carries Star to her bedroom, he begins moving some of his own things in there, making it obvious now, in the wake of this pregnancy crisis, that they are no longer willing to hide their co-habitation from anyone. And Graham, not wanting to cause Star any more distress while she is carrying his children, decides that he really has no choice but to turn a blind eye to it.

The next day, now that Merrill has changed his work shift to nights again in order to be home with Star during the long days, Graham leaves the kids at home with them and makes a trip to the city on his own. And that evening, when Merrill is gone to work, he walks into her room for the first time, praying that they can talk now, praying that she will forgive him.

One look at him standing in her doorway with a tray of food, his pathetic guilt-filled eyes staring at her, and Star loses her already small appetite. "Wasted your time, Rev. Not hungry."

"You have to eat more . please," he places the tray on her lap, "for our babies."

"GET OUTTA MY FACE!" she snaps, and the tray flies on it's own across the room, food spilling everywhere.

The handsome face twitches in anger, but his agony holds it back. "Star, I . I never would have ..," his voice falters, not sure how to say it.

"What? FORCED me?"

"I didn't," he tries to deny, knowing that he's technically right, that she wanted it too, although, at this point, it doesn't exactly feel that way to either of them.

"Oh, so you're saying I INVITED you? If I remember correctly, I told you to go away. You were drunk."

"I'm sorry. I .. I was wrong. I'll never," he looks helplessly at her. "I promised. Promised God."

"Promised god?" she laughs snidely. "That ya wouldn't fuck me again? Oh, this is too fucking rich, Rev. Do ya really think YOU'RE in any position to be making deals with your worthless god? I mean, look at how well he's taken care of you so far! Tortured and killed your wife, let you knock up a heathen whore who's about to become your sister-in-law and even turned you into a drunk rapist! Just like my uncle!"

"Don't say that!" he snaps angrily now. "I'm not like your uncle!"

"Sure could've fooled me," she grunts, knowing he really isn't but wanting to hurt the man as much as she can right now. Hurt him like she, herself, is hurting at the uncontrollable spin her life has taken.

"Star, please," he pleads with her. "I . I just don't know what to say."

"Don't say anything. You make me sick," she turns away from him. "Just don't say anything."

Heaving a sigh of defeat, he steps back out, finds his kids and has them bring her another meal and clean up the spilled food mess for him. By the time Bo and Morgan bound into the room, Star's feeling a bit hungry again, and she happily visits and eats with them.

Waking the next morning, Merrill lying beside her asleep, she laughs derisively at seeing a large brand new television in their room. "Graham must have brought it in during the night for us," Merrill wakes and kisses her. "He wouldn't tell me what he was up to yesterday, just said he was getting us something in the city. I know you and Graham butt heads on a lot of things, but he really does care about you or he'd never break his own rule about only having one television in the house. Christ, I've wanted a TV in my room for years, but he didn't want it to set a bad example for the kids. At least it'll help pass some time while you're stuck in bed a few more days. He just wanted to help."

- Suddenly Merrill and I can share a room completely, he gives us a TV, and that's supposed to make everything better between us? .. No fucking way! -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And on the week goes, Star staying in the room, seeing little of Graham, as the kids and Merrill bring all her meals to her now. Only once she actually runs into him in the hallway on her way to the bathroom, but the man immediately drops his eyes at seeing her unfriendly face, and neither says a word to the other as he keeps moving past her to the kid's room.

Friday comes too soon to everyone but Merrill, and it is once again the day before her wedding.


CHAPTER 19

After talking to the doctor on her cell, Star makes a decision. It's late afternoon, Merrill has gone to work, unable to get out of his shift this time, and the bride-to-be, having spent the entire week upstairs, is stir-crazy, to say the least.

Dressed to go outside, she casually walks by Graham, who immediately stands. "Where are you going?"

Ignoring him, she walks outside, down the driveway and onto the dirt road, while he follows silently behind. - Fucking prison guard! -

"You need a ride?" Lionel asks eagerly, his truck stopped short at seeing Star.

"Sure," she smiles, opens the driver's side door and hops right in over the kid before Graham can close the distance. A quick glance out the rear window confirms that Graham's face has turned dark, and before she can stop herself, Star flashes him a grin and pats Lionel on the shoulder.

Unfortunately, Star regrets her decision to take that ride almost immediately when the kid pulls over into a little side road just as soon as they're out of sight of Graham. "Hey! I was hoping for a ride into town. What the fuck we doing here?"

"Oh come on," he turns and grins at her. "I may not be a city boy like you're used to, but all my friends know you're banging both of'em. And I've seen you looking back at me. You can't tell me that you're not out looking for some last minute action before you get hitched tomorrow?"

"I am not," she lies easily, only wishing now to protect the Hess family name for their children's sake. "And if I've looked at you, it was only because YOU'VE been staring at ME!

"Course I have. You're the fucking hottest babe to ever come through our shit little town. I just want a kiss is all," he leans in close. "I know you're knocked up."

"I don't think so, kid," she says, pulling away. "Either take me to town or I'm getting out." - Sure, I woulda fucked you if Graham hadn't showed up that night, but I haven't even thought about your barely legal ass since. -

Lionel isn't about to be put off that easily, not when he's had his share of town girlfriends by now and is not at all shy like Merrill. Leaning in again, he touches her hair. "Knock it off, you little shit," she growls and turns to open the passenger side door.

It doesn't deter him in the least. He simply reaches over and pulls Star back towards him. Just as she's balling up her fist to smack him one, though, fairly confident that although she's pregnant she can still take out one snot-nosed kid, the driver's door flies open, and Lionel's ass is being lifted out by his shirt collar. "Hey, I only wanted a kiss!" he pulls out of Graham's grip.

"I believe she said NO." It was stated quite calmly, but Star can feel the warning in the air.

Lionel isn't smart enough to feel a damn thing. "I ain't afraid of you!" he huffs himself up. "You're a fucking minister!"

"Really?" Graham replies in a much lower menacing voice, as he steps closer, ready to kick ass in a way he hasn't done since he was a teen and had to physically defend his right to be different than the other kids. "Because right now, BOY, I don't exactly feel my calling."

Warning in the air be damned, Star climbs out the other side. "You two yahoos can do your male posturing without me." And she's off, walking down the road, Graham immediately forgetting the kid to follow her, as Lionel snorts profanity and drives away.

"I don't need a fucking bodyguard!" she shouts over her shoulder, walking faster. "I could've handled him!"

This time, Star is the one ignored, as Graham keeps pace, staying only a few yards behind, not about to let her out of his sight again. When Star stops at a specific tree, though, Graham begins to falter, turning pale as he slowly catches up to her. Her mouth opens in surprise, turning to him, anger gone suddenly to whisper, "This is it."

"Yes," he confirms it flatly. "She died here. Now let's go home." The man is simply not ready to discuss it further with anyone, especially with a person who drives him to fury so often.

"It's not my home," Star sighs almost sadly and touches the tree with her palm, feeling a sudden urge to know more about her 'sister' that died here. With that touch, her body starts to tremble, and her hair whips out around her for a moment, captured in a ghost of a breeze through the warm afternoon still air.

Suddenly, Graham smells something, something he hasn't smelled in so very long. It's Colleen's perfume, and it's coming from Star. Stepping up to her, he worriedly touches her shoulder, bringing an instant end to the trembling. "Graham?" she sighs, turning to face him, a very different voice coming from her that reaches to his heart in a way that his mind can not truly deny.

"Nooo," he moans, unable to turn away or even move his hand from her shoulder. "It can't be, not possible." Graham, a simple man of Christian faith, is staring into eyes that are no longer green, eyes that have turned brown, the same beautiful shade of his beloved Colleen's.

"Everything is possible," she smiles up at him. "Especially when good souls are involved . a good soul like Star, allowing me to use her to say good-bye, My Dear."

"Nooo," he moans again. "I miss you so much, Colleen."

"And I you, but our time is over. You must move on with the next, with ..," and she abruptly stops, her eyes showing flashes of green now as though struggling internally with Star. Smiling again, the brown comes back in place. "She is just as stubborn as you, Dear. Now hurry and kiss me. My time is almost over."

"No wait," he cries, but seeing the brown already draining from her eyes, as she reaches up for a final kiss from her husband, Graham desperately envelopes her mouth with his, feeling momentarily the familiar soft gentle passion of Colleen within him. It's reaching down the well-known path to his soul, where it has often traveled and is very welcome, but that gentle passion is now turning to fire, the fire he feels with Star, and, feeling no barrier trying to stop it, it reaches down even further into him, into places he never thought were part of him, places he's been afraid to open.

A part of Graham's consciousness still wants to pull away, pull away to keep those alien fires out of his soul, his soul that is only supposed to belong with gentle Colleen. But his subconscious is not about to let that happen, and just as he surrenders to the consuming flame, his hand moving to the back of her head in desire, Star returns completely.

In disgust, she pulls away from him, clamping down on her own burning want to shout indignantly, "Colleen! You didn't say you were gonna kiss him!" As if in response, a breeze lifts her hair again, and Star stomps her foot, "It's NOT funny!"

Turning from Graham, she marches back towards the farm while he follows, dazed by what he's seen and felt and can no longer deny. It was something that contradicts everything about life and death that he thought was true, but Graham Hess is not the only one walking now with a very unsettled step.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the safety of her room, Star begins to count down the hours to the wedding. - Oh Gaia, I wish Merrill was here! Need to keep busy! Can't believe that kiss with Graham! -

Graham is also watching the clock, staring at his minister's clothes, all laid out and ready. - Going to marry Merrill in them soon. Marry him to Star. Dear Lord, what am I going to do? -

Hours pass, and not able to bury herself in reading any longer, Star heads to the bathroom to take a very long bath. In time, Graham knocks on the door. "Star? Are you OK?"

"Yeah," she answers after a moment's hesitation. "Could you get me some lemonade? I'm thirsty."

"Of course," he hurries down the stairs and is right back with a glass. "I'll leave it out here for you."

"No, I don't wanna get out. Bring it in here. Don't worry, Rev. Nothing you haven't seen," she laughs softly, "and you can always close your eyes."

A sigh, knowing that she's right, and he brings it in to her.

Blue eyes glance furtively at the tub, and when green eyes see them, she may have laughed before, but not now. Down into the bubbles Star ducks to hide while Graham moves quickly to place the glass on the floor near her and turn away. "Wait," she snags his arm, asking hesitantly. "Keep me company?"

"Ummm . OK," he murmurs and sits down on the toilet seat, being careful to keep his eyes studiously straight ahead while they begin to talk about Bo and Morgan and other 'safe' subjects.

Star didn't understand why she felt the need to hear his voice, but she knew she did. The bath wasn't calming her like she wanted it to. Her nerves so raw and aching, thinking about tomorrow, that only being able to talk to Graham while she bathes is soothing her, so soothing, in fact, that she falls asleep.

Graham, realizing that she's stopped talking, looks over, moves to his knees to face her, gently wipes at bubbles that have crept up to her cheeks, and smiles softly. "Star? Wake up. I can't leave you asleep in the tub."

Eyes open sleepily, half hooded. "Then don't leave me, Graham," she whispers, her mouth parting to lean upwards towards those full yet masculine lips that burn so good on her.

"I don't want to leave you," he whispers back. Graham Hess may be a minister who loves his brother, but he is still only a man. And even knowing that he will indeed marry her tomorrow to his brother, he just can't seem to find the strength now to resist kissing her one last time. Can't or won't.

Leaning down to taste again the strangely compelling heat that they so easily create together, he willingly, unrestrained, sober, and untricked by his wife, moves for another man's woman. "Gotcha Rev!" she shouts triumphantly, pulling him into the tub to splash and sputter on top of her while water flies all around, soaking the bathroom. "Thanks!" she continues to laugh, sliding out from under him towards the door. "Needed the laugh. See ya in church tomorrow."

Alone in his misery, Graham stands, his clothes dripping wet, and kicks the inside of the tub, almost breaking his foot in his foolishness. "SHIT!" he swears out loud for the first time in years, loses his balance and falls back into the bubbly perfumed water. And sprawled in that water, breathing hard in anger, pain and frustration, the man suddenly starts laughing loudly, almost
insanely at first at the nightmare his life has become. Then, soon, laughter turns quieter, realizing that Star really did need a laugh after all, and, as usual with her, he fell right into it. - If I don't laugh, I'll just end up crying! And God knows if I'll ever be able to stop! -

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bedtime, and the Hess children make a last ditch attempt to be heard.

"What's the matter?" he asks them in their room. "Is it your stomach that hurts? Your head?"

"It's my head," Bo nods solemnly. "I think I need an operation tomorrow."

"So do I," Morgan chimes in. "My stomach hurts bad. You better take us to the hospital, Dad. We could die. Uncle Merrill will understand if you can't marry him tomorrow."

"Don't you want your uncle to be happy?" he asks, understanding what they're doing. "He loves Star."

"Star doesn't love him," Morgan says with an adult's certainty.

"Well," Graham coughs, sure that it's true too. "That's between her and Uncle Merrill."

"I think Star loves YOU, Daddy," Bo adds quietly.

Another cough, as he tries to deny and rationalize it in his mind. - Star isn't a loving woman. All she cares about is sex, joking around and her strange Wiccan ways. If she really loved me, we'd get along better ..., wouldn't we? - "Yes," he agrees with his kids. "I'm sure she does . as her soon to be brother-in-law. Now go to bed."

"Daddy?" Bo asks, as he's about to close the door. "Do you love Star?"

"Of course I do," he replies after only a moment's hesitation. "She's going to be the mother of your cousins."

"Dad," Morgan speaks up again. "It's a sin to lie."

It stops him in his tracks, but he can't say anything to the truth, and the door is closed, painfully looking away from the sad faces on his children staring back at him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Stopping by Star's room, making up an unnecessary wedding ceremony excuse in his mind to talk to her one more time, he knocks on her door, receiving no answer. - Too early for her to be sleeping, - he thinks worriedly and opens it.

Of all the sights to see from this woman who continually shocks him, this is one he never expected. Star is half way out the window, carrying a small suitcase. "Get away from the window before you fall!" he cries, rushing to her.

"I'm leaving! Changed my mind. Tell Merrill I'm sorry."

"No!" he swiftly snags the suitcase out of her hand, throwing it onto the bed.

Turning back to grab her arm, he's too late; Star is already on the porch roof, looking for a way down. Only seconds later ... "Let me go!" she shouts angrily, as his arms move around her.

"Stop it!" he demands harshly, tightening his grip. "If you fall, you'll kill our babies!"

"I won't fall! Let me go! I can't get married!"

"Why not?" A question laced with bitterness. "Isn't that what you wanted?"

"I never .. not Mer... Fuck! I don't know!"

"My babies have a right to the Hess family name," he stares hard at her. "You HAVE to get married now. They'll be no bastards in my family!"

"Bullshit!" she snorts. "If you're so fucking worried about it, then why don't YOU marry me?" - Oh Gaia! Did I just say that?! -

Instead of laughing at her, like she had fully expected from him, he simply shoots back, "Why don't YOU convert to Christianity?"


**** The final bridge to cross. ****

"Never! Not if my life depended on it!"

"And I wouldn't marry a heathen if MY life depended on it!"

- But you did! - Star almost cries out and exposes Colleen. Only the loving kiss she just felt them share, full of beautiful warm memories of their happy marriage is holding her back this time.

CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH from the driveway. Merrill is home from work early. No time to finish this fight.

The rest of the night is spent in retreat in their rooms, Star holding almost desperately to Merrill, and Graham tossing and turning, wondering to himself if he should have let her go when he had the chance. - I could have borrowed the neighbor's car to drive her to the bus station and broke the news to Merrill when I got back. - The man is suspecting, at this point, that dealing with
Merrill's broken heart would have been easier than what he is about to go through with performing their ceremony in the morning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He was right.

Not even wanting to look at the bride-to-be at daybreak for fear of what he will say to her, Graham races to the church with the kids as soon as possible, listening to their complaints of needing a doctor the entire way to town. Having already chucked the 'not seeing the groom the day of the wedding' tradition, Star and Merrill spend the morning alone, Merrill doing his best to
keep her calm before Mariah comes to pick them up. He knows Star is nervous about getting married, of course. He just has no idea ... yet ... of the true extent of that nervousness.

Merrill isn't the only one. The whole town soon shows up to see the strange, pregnant city girl marry the minister's brother. Many suspect something more is going on, and those that don't can certainly tell that Star has not acted like the usual giddy young bride. The church is filled to the brim with these interested people, and Merrill walks in to proudly take his place in front of the altar.

Minutes go by, and Star has still not made her appearance. Graham, seeing the pained look on Merrill's face in front of the whole town, whispers, "Wait," and slips into the room where Star is supposed to be getting dressed.

Mariah is there, and she immediately smiles at Graham and points to the bathroom. "She's sick."

"Sick? Is she OK?" he frets, walking to the bathroom door. "She hasn't been sick yet from the babies?"

"It's not the babies causing it. The blending of you two is as perfect as can be."

"Mariah?" they hear Star cry from the other room.

His hand goes up, motioning Mariah to stay where she is, and he quietly enters the ladies room alone. Star is sitting on the floor in her wedding dress, a large wrap around her shoulders with her head in her arms, crying. Footsteps are heard, but assuming that her friend has come in, the distraught woman doesn't look up from her pain.

Very carefully, Graham lowers himself to sit on the floor next to her, being sure not to let his body touch hers. "Oh Mariah," she sobs. "What have I done? You were right. I do need Graham. I wanna kill him sometimes, but I . I . I love him! Gaia help me, I love the big jerk!"

"I love you too, Star," he says with a tender smile, his heart bursting with joy. - I think I've known for a long time. Just took that last kiss to finally let go of Colleen. -

"You do?" she breathes in horror at seeing him there.

"Yes," he nods firmly. "I'm sorry for so much."

"Me too, Graham. So much."

"But, Star, I meant it when I said our babies need my name. It's very important to me."

"Not a name," she shakes her head. "They just need a father."

**** Warning. Proceed with Caution. Very hormonal pregnant woman at large. ****

"I'm their father. I should be the one to marry you."

"SHOULD be?" her voice begins to change. "You make it sound like a death sentence!"

"That's not what I meant," he quickly tries to explain.

"But that's what you SAID! Would marrying a fucking heathen be THAT bad?"

"Please Star," his hand touches her knee in desperation. "Don't swear in church. I'll teach you everything about Christianity myself."

**** Foolish, foolish man. Apparently doesn't know how to read signs. ****

I'll say whatever the fuck I want!" she jumps to her feet. "And I'll BE whatever fucking religion I want! You can't MAKE me convert!"

"If you love me, you will," he stands up beside her.

"If you love me, you wouldn't ask me, you arrogant asshole!"

**** Time stops at that bridge again. ****

"Stop swearing in my church!"

"Well, if this is YOUR church, then get your ass out there and do your JOB!"

"FINE! I WILL!" And out he storms past an astonished Mariah ... back to the altar.


**** A sign comes down. Bridge out of order. No crossing today. ****


CHAPTER 20

"Graham?" Merrill whispers, trying to remain calm while he fights the panic building in him. "Is she coming?"

"Oh yes," he assures the nervous groom. "She'll be here if I know her." Only moments later, Star sweeps past Mariah, who was sure the wedding would be called off, and practically stalks down the aisle toward the altar, her angry eyes only on Graham. She is truly a vision, blinding Merrill in the simple yet beautiful form fitting, ankle-length white wedding dress she chose. Her dress,
showing only the smallest curve of pregnancy, looks molded perfectly to her. No veil is worn, hair is pinned up around her head, and there is a slit up to her mid-thigh on one leg and a plunging neckline and back that shows much too much skin for a proper Christian ceremony.

This is no blinding vision to Graham. His eyes are quite clear, flashing furiously now in front of the congregation. If the man had seen that neckline in the bathroom that had been hidden by the wrap, there would have been no declarations of love between them. Clutching his bible in a death grip, he looks from Star to Mariah and back to Merrill ... and begins the ceremony. His words stay clipped and cool, cutting through the lengthy service as quickly as he can, anger keeping him from feeling the burning agony of despair squeezing at his heart.

Merrill, his eyes only on Star and the thought of her being his wife now, is paying little attention to anything else. And Star, in a desperate attempt to calm her anger and not actually bring the building down on everyone like she probably could, is staring back at Merrill, seeing a man she truly cares for, as one hand keeps a life-line grip on Mariah's.


**** The moment the town's been waiting for ...

"If anyone here today knows of any just reason why these two people should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace."

Hushed silence fills the church .. for about two seconds.

*COUGH * COUGH * COUGH * COUGH *

Graham's eyes swing hard into the first pew. Out of all the spectators in the church, only his children would be willful enough to defy him like this now. It's their shortest childhood rebellion ever, though. Seeing their father's fury aimed at THEM, they immediately look down in shame, coughing fits miraculously cured. But not forgotten. These will be 'coughs' told around family dinner tables for years.

The service proceeds, and soon his anger has run its course. It's time to finish the job and pronounce them husband and wife. The stone-like hardness disappears from his face, his tone turns softer, hesitant, and Star, sensingand hearing the change is staring at him now, seeing lips beginning to twitch, as he tries to get the final words out. The bride is actually picturing herself humiliating the Hess family, throwing her hands over those lips, those lips of the man she knows she loves, about to give her to another. Unfortunately, it's a picture that no matter how much strength she may have within, she just can't seem to bring to reality on her own.

Every other set of eyes is also glued to Graham. Even those townspeople that didn't know before are sensing now that their minister is hesitating either because he doesn't want this woman as part of their family or, even more shockingly, because he wants her as his own. Most do not know for sure, but the spectacle of watching Father Hess flounder in front of everyone will soon be discussed and dissected until every little nuance of the ceremony has been memorized by all for generations to come.

Graham and Star could care less right now. Staring into each other's eyes, they're seeing and feeling only the other. The tears that Star had angrily dried in the bathroom are threatening to come back, and she can see Graham's own eyes glistening wet like hers. His mouth opens, ready to announce for anyone who can hear 'No, I love you,' when a baby suddenly cries sharply.

Eyes break contact, and Graham, seeing now all of his church staring at him, leaning forward eagerly in the pews, waiting to see what he will do, glances at Merrill, a glance he'll forever wish he hadn't taken. Merrill has finally come to see the truth; his brother is in love with Star too, and he is staring at the man he always felt respect for, now feeling only shock and hurt.

Graham, being a man of God and a man who would never want for his brother to feel any pain, does the only thing he can at seeing those hurting eyes staring at his. He pushes aside his own selfish desires, focuses only on Merrill ... and pronounces them husband and wife. "You may kiss the bride," his voice lowers to an almost whisper, wishing for all his life the floor would open up and swallow him whole.

Star is struggling not to scream, in shock, herself, that he actually did it, gave her to another man. Almost zombie-like, she turns from Graham, presses her lips on those of Merrill's eagerly moving towards her, takes his hand and walks down the aisle with him.

Sickness in her stomach threatening to come up again, looking visibly ill, the church ladies quickly steer her into the reception that she had repeatedly told them she didn't want. As soon as Merrill has her seated with Mariah at the head table and given a glass of water, he hangs back by the door, waiting for Graham to come through.

Graham is in no hurry to attend this party, though. He immediately ran into the bathroom, sick, himself, and is now splashing cold water onto his face in an effort to keep from sobbing out loud. When he finally feels as composed as he is likely to ever be, he walks by Merrill, knowing that he can't put it off any longer.

"I want to talk to you," Merrill snaps, grabbing at his brother's jacket.

"We will," Graham answers quietly, pulling away. "But not here."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Minutes later .. "Still got a touch of morning sickness, Babe. I'll be fine," Star smiles up at her husband. - Sure I'll be, - she tries to convince herself. - Told Mariah once that I wouldn't let Christian marriage vows keep me bound to Merrill if I could still have Graham on the side. Looks like that's the way it's gonna have to be if Graham lets nature take it's course and we can keep Merrill from finding out. Don't wanna hurt the guy, that's for sure. Guess time will tell if Graham is strong enough to resist the call or not now that I'm married. And I guess I should be happy. At least this way I don't have to keep fighting about converting and becoming the kind of little country wife he'd want me to be. I can be myself with Merrill and just use Graham for sex when I need to. Everything will be cool .. right? .. yeah, right ... So why the hell does it hurt so much? -

- Graham won't talk to me. Star married me. Have to let it go right now and find out later what the hell happened. Just can't believe it; my fucking brother is in love with her too! -

Although Graham is not the best man, he is expected to give a toast too, and he slowly stands, staring only at Merrill, lifting his glass of apple cider with a slight tremor in his hand. The words come well rehearsed from his lips, although, to Graham, it's almost as though he's hearing someone else speak them from far away. "Merrill, my brother, and Star, my . sister, it was my h. honor to marry you. I wish you much happiness, all the blessings of God and a fruitful m ...marriage in his name .. as I once had."

Merrill may be nodding gratefully that his brother managed to still give a fine speech, but Star is not feeling particularly grateful at the moment. Her eyes are only on that glass in his hand.

CRASH! It slips wholly unbroken from his grasp to shatter on the floor.

- What the ..? - he looks to her directly for the first time since the ceremony, a flicker of anger running across his face at knowing what she did. Her own face twitches at his gaze, but they quickly smile at each other while Graham forces a laugh of apology to the room and wipes up the mess with a table linen.

Soon Star is kept busy dancing with everyone, many of the men eager to feel this young beauty in their arms at least once, but when Graham reluctantly asks her, knowing that it's expected of him, she declines and feigns sickness. - Good, - he silently agrees with her. - If we danced, the whole room would know, not just Merrill. Told her I loved her too late. Got what I deserved. She'll never be mine. -

- I can't dance with him! I want to, but it's too soon! Gonna end up crying or tossing my cookies in front of everyone! -

"Don't worry, Star," Bo whispers. "Mommy told me that you only took a wrong turn at the bridge to your true destination. What's a destination? And what bridge? We don't have any bridges around here."

Not sure what to say, she laughs, explaining what she can to the child while deliberately thinking firmly to Colleen in her mind in case there's any chance the woman's spirit can actually sense her thoughts. - I know you wanted me to marry Graham. But for Gaia's sake, can't you see how incompatible we are? I'm nothing like you. He'll be much happier in the long run with one of these ladies here.. right? -

Two hours later, reception over, Merrill and Star say their good-byes and thank-yous and head to the small Bed and Breakfast in town for their wedding night. Being that Star had managed to get permission the day before from her doctor to consummate her marriage just once, and a very slow and gentle once it has to be, the newlyweds manage to have a fairly fulfilling night .... at least for Merrill.

At his house, after having helped the church ladies clean up, Graham spends the rest of the day and night with his children, crying himself to sleep, alone, again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Returning home the next morning, honeymoon postponed until it's safe for Star to travel, Merrill immediately walks into Graham's bedroom, where his brother is making his bed. Silently, he helps him, moving around the large bed, tucking in sheets, fixing blankets, until Graham, unable to take another moment of the tension between them, breaks first, finally cracking from the guilt.
Merrill knew he would.

"I married you," he states very quietly, his eyes steady on the bed. "Let's just forget it. Please. She's your wife." - Please accept it Merrill! Don't make me confess my sins! I don't want to hurt you anymore! -

Merrill has stopped moving, seeing the obvious pain in Graham's face. The younger man no longer wants to ask any questions, afraid he won't like the answers, and knows that nothing can be done to change them now anyways. It's easier to just accept that no matter what may or may not have happened, whether one-sided on Graham's part or two-sided between them, it's over now. Star chose him, not Graham.

His head nods, stating firmly as he walks out, "Yes, she is. She's MY wife."

Merrill is right. Legally and by God's law, Graham knows it and can barely bring himself to look at the woman he loves now. As much time as possible is soon spent away from his home, attending to any and all church and town matters to keep himself busy. The town minister has never felt so far from God in his life, but for want of how else to keep sane and care for his children, he continues on automatic pilot as the days go on and on.

Star often contemplates trying to seduce him again, feeling fairly confident that she can get the man to break once more, but as they can't have actual sex, something her body needs the most, she continues to stick to her decision to wait and try for true release with him after the babies are birthed, safe within her arms. At that time, the choice of whether they actually come together again or not will be entirely up to Graham. He either will or he won't.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As the torturous days go by, Graham's melancholy begins to turn to resentment; resentment that this woman has come into their lives and turned his heart inside out, resentment that she has come between brothers, making them uncomfortable around each other, and resentment that even his children are noticeably upset with him, giving him many sorrowful and disappointed looks that eat at him even more.

His new attitude, hurtful and unfriendly, forces Star to protect her own painful feelings, and, with an air of resignation approaching womanly indignation, she tries to distance herself as much as she can from her husband's brother. It's not long, however, before the resentment building between them comes to a head, ready to explode one night when an argument starts after Merrill has gone to work about how the babies will be raised.

"What other way is there?" he asks, simmering with anger just beneath the surface. "I'll baptize them and they'll be raised Christian, of course .. just like you agreed to."

"Wait a minute," Star stands up. "I NEVER agreed to baptism, and who the fuck said the babies were gonna be raised ONLY Christian?"

"No child of mm .. THIS HOUSE is being raised a pagan!" The man is so completely furious with their situation now, he is even trying, in private with her, to not refer to the children as his anymore.

"I already discussed it with my HUSBAND! The babies can be BOTH!"

"BOTH?! That's impossible!" he shouts in disbelief, rising to his feet.

****** The bridge looms in the distance.******

GERONIMOOOOO!!!!

"It wasn't for Colleen," Star jumps right off that bridge, so angry she could care less about the secret at this point.

"Noooo, you're lying," his face turns white, knowing what she's saying. "Trying to hurt me, like you always do. Always hurting me."

Not about to turn back now and be branded a liar on top of everything else he's called her in the past, Star grins wickedly and hands him a picture of her 'sister' from her wallet. "Here's our group, Rev. This one look familiar?"

A maelstrom of violent emotions run through Graham; tear the picture in half, scream, kill himself, kill the psycho bitch, kill SOMETHING, as he realizes now just where and what his wife did once a month when she insisted that she had to visit family and friends in the city.

"You . you knew? All this time?" he finally stammers out, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides.

"No," she sighs, anger draining away at seeing his anguish. "Not until Mariah came to visit that first time. She figured it out. Colleen used a different last name in our group, and you didn't have any pictures of her around for me to see. But there were signs . signs everywhere."

"My wife . My Colleen," his voice lowers, running out the door, "was a pagan?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After leaving him to his thoughts for a few minutes, she follows him onto the porch, and together they stare at the road. "What are you so scared of, Rev?"

It's almost as though they're back in the glen, but this time their roles are reversed, and Graham is the one in need of help. "All those years," he starts bitterly. "We never fought, never hardly even argued. I thought we knew each other so well. But it was all a lie. A minister married to a pagan. She hid it from everyone, even me. I loved her so much, and she lied to me."

"Don't think that," she speaks softly, placing her hand on his arm. "Colleen loved you. She only hid it to protect you, BECAUSE she loved you. We don't talk about our personal lives very much, most of us keep that part quiet, separate, but Colleen did say she was very happy in the country with her husband and children. And Mariah said she talked to her about your first kiss at the fair. It was very special to Colleen ... just like it was to me."

It makes him glance from the road to her ... but not for long enough. "Colleen was perfect," he continues, eyes steady on that road again, ready to get it all out now. "Perfect. She grew up here like me. We went to school together. She even attended church long before she and I became close. She .. she," his shoulders begin to shake, "was my best friend. I . I let my best friend die."

"Graham," her hand moves to soothe his trembling. "There's nothing you could have done. It was her time."

"No," he snarls fiercely, pulling away from her touch. "I should have stopped it. We were fighting, our first and last fight .. Oh My God!" he suddenly gasps, realizing now the REAL reason they were fighting. "She wanted to go to the city, but I really needed her help with the church that Saturday. She kept insisting she needed to see her friends. I even yelled at her. I NEVER yelled at her. She started crying. I was so Goddamned angry with her, but she wouldn't change her mind. Only cried harder and harder. Made me FURIOUS. Went to the church hoping we could resolve it later that night, and she went off for a walk... But there was NO later! That walk killed her! Killed her because of YOU! YOU and your unholy friends! I NEVER would have left her if we hadn't been fighting! My wife would still be alive if it weren't for YOU!"


**** News Flash - Another jumper has gone over the bridge. ****

Star may have heard everything he said, even understood the reason behind his misplaced logic, but, at this moment, only one sentence is felt, stabbing her in the back. "WE - ARE - NOT - UNHOLY!" she shrieks, racing off the porch towards the road. "Your bigoted mind will NEVER understand!"

He's watching her walk away in the moonlight, rounding a corner out of sight, a small part of him hoping he never sees her again, when déjà vu comes slamming into his stomach, and his mind screams, - NOT AGAIN!! -

Star, walking further and further away, is so furious with herself now for ever feeling the slightest bit of sympathy for a man like Graham that she doesn't even notice that a truck is coming right towards her in the semi-darkness. Lionel's behind the wheel, showing off to friends by driving too fast down the country road, deliberately driving without headlights.

"STAR!!" Graham screams and closes the distance between them, launching himself at her to tumble together towards the side grass, as the truck streaks by, narrowly missing them. Flying through the air, heart pounding, his body instinctively twists, protecting his female and young from hitting the hard ground.

"UGGHHH!" he grunts, their combined weight thudding him solidly into the grass.

Heaving in fear, realizing how close she came to being hit if Graham hadn't saved her, she looks down at him, body shaking, but having no idea what she should truly say. Graham doesn't know either. All he knows is that he wants to kiss her; kiss her in relief so badly it's tearing him apart. But with every ounce of willpower he has left, staring at his brother's wife, the man manages to gently push her off him.

"We're not unholy," she mumbles.

"I know," he looks down at the grass, voice cracking. "I'm sorry. I . I just miss her so much. I . I don't care what she was really. I just . I just wish she would have trusted me to tell me. I loved her so much .. She should have told me."

"Graham," she gently tries to explain again. "Colleen didn't wanna bring unhappiness to your marriage. Being Wiccan was something too important to her. She knew it would hurt you . would cause tension between you. She did what she felt was best. You have to understand that."

"Colleen," he looks up at the night sky. "If you can hear me, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me for not being the kind of husband I should have been . for being," his gaze falls to Star, "an arrogant asshole."

"I don't think you have to apologize to her," she laughs softly. "She never resented it. But I guess even an arrogant asshole can learn to be flexible."

In silence, they walk back to the house, both deep in their own thoughts.

- If I'd known Colleen was Wiccan like Star, would it have changed anything with Star? Would I have stood up and made my intentions known to everyone before the wedding? .. How could I be so stupid? Colleen loved me and still stayed true to herself. I should have taken that chance with Star. Now it's too late. -

- Maybe he'll finally be at peace with what happened to Colleen. I hope so. As much as he drives me insane sometimes, no one should have to suffer like that. -


**** It's a country miracle, Folks - Two jumpers hanging onto a bridge by the skin of their teeth. ****
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours later, the kids are in bed and Star is undressing in her room, standing in panties and a t-shirt in front of a full-length mirror to look at her blossoming profile. Her t-shirt has been pulled up to just under her breasts, and her hands are roaming around the small tight roundness of her stomach. A hiss of breath from the open doorway, and she looks over, discovering Graham staring at her. Seeing nothing but pure love shining in his eyes, her hand is held out to him, inviting.

It's an invitation he doesn't want to refuse. Staring at her hand and then into her eyes, seeing nothing but love reflecting back at him, he smiles, takes the hand and walks behind her, hesitantly encircling his other hand around her waist to feel his children within.

Star instantly melts back into him, neck arching, hands covering his to run along her abdomen and stroke together their creation. Sighing happily, Graham completely relaxes and begins nuzzling into her neck, softly kissing her silky scent, his thoughts only on what his soul is telling him to do; re-affirm his touch on this woman he almost lost forever in another fit of foolish anger.

Very slowly, Star moves his willing hands up under the t-shirt, and his fingers gently run over her hardening nipples, swiftly bringing forth drops of life-giving milk. Moaning, she turns around in his arms, pushes him to his knees and leans down to offer him her breast.

Unlike in the barn, this time Graham doesn't refuse what he knows truly belongs to him, and he eagerly suckles, relishing the taste of her sweet milk. One hand falls, cupping her bottom, kneading the soft muscles, as the other hand holds firmly her breast to his mouth.

"Please Graham," she moans again. "Please."

Without hesitation, Graham quickly complies. Sucking fiercely, he moves his hand around and under her panties, finding that rosebud of pleasure to rub firmly, somehow knowing just how she likes it. "YES GRAHAM!" Star swiftly spills over the edge with a sharp cry, legs buckling and giving out to fall onto her knees in front of him.

His smile is amazing; proud, happy, yet full of shyness, and with an amused smile of her own, she allows him to modestly pull her shirt back down and wait as though a love-struck teen now. "Lean back, honey," she purrs happily. "I wanna return the favor."

"You don't have to," he blushes. "I . I never let Colleen. Making love is enough." Graham, of course, knows what is being offered, but this 'favor' is something the man has simply never felt the need to experience in his proper Christian marital bed, something that he never felt was necessary for his own pleasure or, of course, necessary for procreation. - So many things Colleen
wanted to try. So many things I'm beginning to think I was foolish not to. -

"Maybe it's enough for you," Star smiles, thoroughly enjoying his charming innocence now that so often used to only annoy her. "But it's not for me. Not with you anyways. Everything is so different, better with you." - Hardly ever do this. Better take it while you can. -

"I know what you mean," he agrees, closing his eyes and letting her push him back. "Everything is so amazing with you, Star."

Within moments, enveloped in the warmth of her mouth, Graham is clutching desperately to the carpeting, not realizing, until now, just what it was he was missing all those years in his moral stubbornness. "Oh God Star, I love you!" he's crying, thrusting into the deep wet suction of her throat, on the verge of release when his eyes suddenly open to see a picture of Merrill on the wall; Merrill and Star on their wedding day.

- Oh My God! What have I done?! WITH MY BROTHER'S WIFE! - Gasping in agony, he jumps to his feet. "I'm sorry! I can't! I can't!"

"Graham?" she looks up at him with pain-filled eyes, watching in disbelief as the man quickly zips up his straining, unfulfilled desire.

"Please, Star," he cries, fleeing to the bathroom. "Forgive me!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

- I didn't orgasm! I stopped it! Never touch her again! Never! Never! Never! - he's thinking frantically, grasping desperately to the very weak fact that if he didn't actually finish, then he didn't actually commit adultery, a sin so horrible to this man of God that he's just not sure that he can deal with it too.

Listening to the shower pounding down in the bathroom, knowing that the man she loves and needs is once again purging himself of his passion for her, Star throws herself onto the bed and sobs her heart out, wishing with all her might that the world would just end now ... end the pain forever.

The very next day .... Star gets that wish.