Author: AngstPuppy
Author Email: sweetsorrow@populli.net
Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Jim/Blair
Status: Complete
Date: 10/10/02
Category: First Times, Humor, Romance
Author's website: http://sweetsorrow.populli.net/index.htm
Disclaimer: If I got paid for this I would have lost my job a long time ago. I don't own em, I don't make money off of em, but I'm also not giving them back anymore when I'm done. So there.
Author's Notes: This started out as a challenge: "Under what circumstances would Jim call Blair "Big Guy""? Then JR said it needed sex. So for JR I present the sex scene than wouldn't(oh god, I'm gonna say it) come to an end. sorry. I would also like to thank the wonderful and wacky Mongoosians without whose friendship and encouragement I wouldn't even be attempting to write. Here's to you ladies.
Story Notes: No spoilers, very little angst, just Sentinel Silliness and Guide Goofinessoh, yeah.and sex.
Summary: Jim is a cute drunk, then he wants to talk and Blair doesn't.
Warnings: m/m
Soon
by AngstPuppy
Hearing Jim's keys in the door after the third try, Blair took off his glasses and looked over to see a thoroughly skunked sentinel.
"Please tell me you didn't drive."
Jim started to shake his head, obviously thought better of it and said "Nope, Siiiiiii'mn dropped me off."
Blair headed out to the balcony, leaned over and gave Simon a thumbs up to let him know that Jim had made it into the loft OK. Even without Sentinel sight he could see the grin on Simon's face as he drove off. *Sure laugh it up Simon, you don't have to deal with a drunk, or hungover, Jim.* A loud thump and a muffled "shit" brought him back into the living room.
Blair did have to admit to himself that a drunk Jim was a cute Jim. The sentinel was sitting in the middle of the floor staring owlishly at his shoes as if getting them off was an exercise in quantum physics and he hadn't studied. He looked up at Blair and sighed. "Hey Big Guy." and then frowned. "When'd you get so tall?"
Blair laughed softly, reaching down and running his hand through Jim's short silky hair. "Well, Little Fella, they say that alcohol stunts your growth, and from the smell of your breath I'd say you lost at least two feet tonight."
Jim sighed again and leaned into Blair's leg, resting his head on a convenient thigh and wrapping his arms around the calf.
*Uh, oh. Seems a drunk Jim is also a cuddly Jim.*
"OK, Jim. Time for all good little Sentinels to be in bed. Uppsy daisy!" It took a few tries, but they finally made it up the stairs and Blair efficiently stripped his unhelpful partner and got him under the covers. Just as he was about to turn and leave Jim shot a hand out and grabbed Blair's wrist.
"Stay."
Blair swallowed around the lump in his throat and met Jim's blurry eyes as best he could.
"No."
"No? You don't want to?"
Blair smiled, Jim had never sounded so much like a petulant four year old. "Oh, Jim, you have no idea how much I want to."
"Then why?"
OK, maybe three. "Because you're drunk and I won't let you use that as an excuse in the morning."
"Oh, OK." He let go of Blair's hand and rolled over on his side. "Soon?"
"Yeah, soon." He headed back down the stairs and just as he got to the bottom he heard his sentinel speak softly one more time.
"love you Blair"
Blair's smile could have lit up the darkened loft. "Love you too Jim. Love you too."
***
Blair had been up for two hours before the first tell tale groan came floating down from upstairs.
"Dial it down Jim." Blair knew he couldn't keep the smirk out of his voice, so he didn't even try.
After a few more groans and some thumping and shuffling, downstairs came his much worse for the wear sentinel, looking as if the garbage truck had come back for another round...and this time it had won.
"Do you have to yell?"
Gravel had nothing on Jim's voice, and since Blair knew he had whispered his one line of instructions he came to a sudden realization. A drunk Jim may be cute, but a hung over Jim was just....pathetic.
He tiptoed over to Jim with a mug of hot fresh coffee, which the man immediately tried to inhale, and turned and gave him a gentle shove toward the bathroom.
"Shower, Mr. Congeniality, then more coffee."
"ghsoueffakdmphhhph."
Blair was pretty good with languages, and he was even becoming quite adept at 'Sentinel-speak' but he had to admit that that last phrase could have meant either "Fuck you" or "Thanks Buddy." He was really hoping for the latter.
Quickly arranging a high protein breakfast for his hung over friend, Blair was just putting a plate of bacon and eggs and a glass of orange juice at Jim's chair when Jim came back out of the bathroom. "You're looking better, shower must've helped. Hungry?" Blair pointed to the cholesterol fest he had prepared.
"Oh, yeah." Jim nodded enthusiastically as he sat down and practically dove into the food in front of him. "You're a prince among men Chief."
"Yeah, that's me, Prince Blair." He contemplated his coffee. "So, if I'm the Prince, that makes you the court J..."
"Don't even go there squirt." Blair marveled that Jim could throw out insults and shovel eggs into his mouth at the same time.
"That's not what you called me last night."
Blair was sure those little pieces of egg were going to be a bitch to get out of his hair. Hiding a grin behind a paper towel he chanced a look at Jim and considered the impromptu egg-shower very much worth it. Jim's eyes weren't exactly bulging but they were open very wide, and those two bright red spots high up on his cheeks made him look like some demented Raggedy Ann doll.
"Um..."
*That's my sentinel, always so eloquent.*
Jim cleared his throat and tried again. "Umm, uh..." Taking pity on his suddenly incoherent friend Blair threw him a bit of a life line.
"So, Jim, why'd you get drunk last night?" Blair could actually see the man's walls going up. It was rather like watching the armor cover the Bat Mobile. Slip, slam, bang, boom and soon he would be impenetrable.
"I'm a cop Sandburg, I have plenty of reasons to get drunk."
*Oh no, not this time James Joseph Ellison. You can put those walls up for everyone else, wrap chains around yourself until you're more steel than man. It won't do any good this time. Last night you said you loved me, and though you may not remember I do! Now, if I can only get you to admit it...sober...*
Blair moved to try and take control of the situation, to take the hand of his retreating sentinel. Both were so intent on the game of advance and retreat that the sound of the phone startled them. Jim leaped out of his chair and toward the phone like it was a lifeline, but from the look on his face he wasn't liking the phone conversation any more than he had been liking the one at the table. Without sentinel senses, Blair couldn't hear the other end of the conversation, but he figured out it was Simon from Jim's first clipped "Sir?" And even if he couldn't hear the other end of the conversation, Jim's side was indeed fascinating. Blair found himself mentally inserting Charlie Brown Teacher noises for Simon's side of the conversation.
"............."
"Yes, sir, I'm fine, a little hungover, but...."
"............."
"No, sir, I didn't, at least, I don't think I did..."
".............??"
"Soon, Simon. You know this penchant you have for nosing into other peoples..."
".............!!!?"
"Um, that would be you sir."
"............."
"Twice? Oh, once in the bushes...."
"............."
"...and once in the parking lot, beside your car. Terribly sorry about that sir."
"............."
"I will sir."
"....."
"Yes sir."
"....."
"Yes sir."
"....."
"Yes sir. Simon? Thanks."
Blair had taken the opportunity of clearing the table to try and school his face into a more serious expression. The combination of "wah-wah-wah's" in his head with Jim sounding like a teenage son being dressed down by his father, *Daddy Simon? Oooh, don't even go there Sandburg...*, had nearly sent him into a giggle fit, and now was definitely not the time for an attack of the giggles. He heard Jim put the phone back on the charger and then cross the floor to stand behind him at the sink. He imagined he could almost hear the creak of Jim's reluctant jaw as he opened his mouth to speak.
"Sandburg, about last night..."
*Oh, shit, there's a kiss off line if I ever heard one.*
"Just tell me you missed his shoes man."
"Huh? Oh." Jim's chuckle vibrated down his arms and through the hands he had placed on Blair's shoulders creating interesting vibrations in Blair's own arms.
"I must have, he didn't tell me I owed him a new pair."
"That's good, it's way bad karma to hurl on the boss's shoes." Blair dried his hands off and turned to go back to the table but was prevented from doing so by a large brick wall that looked suspiciously like Jim. He tried an experimental little push, but the wall stood strong. Jim hadn't taken his hands off of Blair's shoulders when he had turned, just switched sides, and now he was running his thumbs lightly back and forth over Blair's collar bones. Coherent thought for Blair was fast becoming an impossibility. His hands were working fine though. He brought them up to Jim's robe covered chest and lightly petted, unsure yet as to wether he had been given leave to touch.
"Chief, you with me here?"
"yeaaaaaaahhhhh...."
"Blair, I...kind of....lied to Simon.
The sound of Jim admitting he lied to someone brought Blair part way out of the sensual haze just being this close to Jim was creating. "You obfuscated?" He looked up at Jim just in time to see him nod. "How?"
Jim's hands were now making their way up the sides of Blair's neck to sink fingers in his hair. The slow massage they started was both soothing and arousing and Blair nearly missed Jim's next words.
"I remember everything I said last night."
"oh." Blair let that sentence fly through his mind a few times before the prompter took the cue card it was written on and made him read it....slowly....and....carefully. "OH!"
Blair knew his eyes were wide, wide as saucers, but all he could see when he looked up at Jim again, was a set of lips that had figured prominently in his dreams for the last few months. Those lips came closer and closer, stopping only a hair's breadth away from his own.
"...and blair?"
"mmmmmmm....???"
"it's soon. now."
*Huston, we have lip lock!* Being kissed by Jim was everything that Blair had ever dreamed it would be, and more. Jim Ellison had this kissing thing down! His lips took over Blair's with such command that Blair wondered just when it was that he had lost control of this situation. He'd had a plan, really he had. Get Jim to confess his feelings and then slowly introduce his shy sentinel to the delights of male/male love, the wonders of which Blair had only tasted a few times himself. He wasn't going to let his relative inexperience stop him from teaching Jim everything he knew,
though, and he was sure they could make up a few moves on their own. He had a sneaking suspicion that his plan had somehow been thoroughly fubar'd somewhere along the way. He opened his mouth wider and Jim's tongue invited itself in and proceeded to learn the make and model of every tooth in Blair's head. When that talented tongue slid lightly across the roof of his mouth Blair couldn't keep in the moan that bubbled up from deep in his chest. Then they were gone. Those lips and that tongue with which Blair wanted to become much more intimately aquatinted were suddenly taken awayfrom him. He hoped he hadn't whined out loud. He was sure that he was gasping, could feel himself trying to draw breath into starved lungs.
"But first," Jim grabbed a dazed and confused Blair's hand and drug him toward the couch. "I'm going to tell you why I got drunk last night."
They stopped in front of the couch while Jim brushed the hair back from Blair's scowling face. "What's wrong Chief?"
Blair shook his head and stared up at Jim, looking straight into his eyes as if trying to see through them and in to the heart and soul of his sentinel.
"This...isn't...what....I don't know!" He threw his hands up, exasperation radiating from his body. Jim continued to run his hands over Blair's hair. He sighed, never taking his eyes from Blair's as if knowing that the eye contact would verify the truth of his words. "There's a...few things you don't know about me Blair. If you'll let me, I'll tell you now." Finally, Blair nodded. "O....ooof!...K!" As the man in front of him sat, he found him self unceremoniously pulled down into Jim's lap. "umm...Jim? The lap thing? I'm not a poodle."
Jim held him tenaciously by the waist, the wriggling he was doing trying to escape only serving to make the sparkle in Jim's eyes grow hotter. "I don't know Chief. The hair...the eyes...."
"...the teeth I'm going to sink into you if you don't stop..."
"This would be bad, how?" The question had been muttered quietly, but Blair had heard and the flush that the question caused came from Blair's toes. He grew quiet and his pants grew tighter. Serious and still now, he nodded for Jim to continue.
"I've known that I was bi-sexual since I was 16, and the captain of the football team decided that he'd rather have me than the head cheerleader." Blair only realized that his mouth was hanging open when Jim put a finger under his chin and closed it. "But...."
"Please Blair, let me tell it all, or I might not have the guts to finish it." Another silent nod and Jim continued.
"I had been with a couple of girls. While it was ok, satisfying in a way that only your first experiences with sex can be, they were really nothing to write home about. But when Alan looked at me, just looked at me...phew... It took a lot of guts for him to come to me, I was his size, maybe even a bit bigger, and I could have easily beat the crap out of him, and made his life a living hell in and out of school. But I didn't, I said yes, because even with my upbringing and society and what all, it just felt so....right. We saw each other his whole senior year. Dated a few
girls to help keep the rumors at bay, even took a lesbian couple to the senior prom as our dates." Jim's eyes said his mind was somewhere far off for a moment, in one of the few happy times of his past. "That was a fun night..."
Blair hit Jim lightly on his shoulder, to bring him back to the here and now. He was thrilled that Jim was sharing part of himself with Blair, and he knew that this was very, very important for Jim to be speaking this much in one sitting. But he really, really wanted to get back to the kissing thing, and more of the touching thing, and maybe even some moving this up to the big bed thing...
"All right..." his sentinel, *Mine! Mine!* his mind was screaming at him, took the hint and went on with his story. Jim seemed to be very good at splitting his attention, as his hands were exploring Blair's back and sides, once again making concentration difficult. "When Alan left for college it hurt, but I knew that our...relationship...had so many strikes against it from the start that distance would be the final straw. So, I bottled it all up, like always and went on. Then came the Army and that certainly was not the place to let the cork out of the bottle." Blair's mind helpfully supplied him with a ridiculous image of Jim's sexuality as a genie rising from a cobalt blue bottle. He only just held in the snicker that must have shown in his eyes because Jim chose that moment to sink his hands into Blair's hair and bring his face close. "What's so funny short stuff?" He felt each puff of air from Jim's mock growled words fan across his lips. He bit his own lips to keep the snickers at bay and shook his head. "Nothing big guy, honest. Just over active brain cells. But Jim, why didn't you tell me? I mean, before?"
Jim sighed, but didn't let go of Blair. "Chief, I need you in so many ways. You know it's not easy for me to admit that." Blair nodded as he felt a flush of warmth go through him. "In the beginning it was the Sentinel thing, then a Cop thing, but now..." Blair watched Jim take a deep breath as the truth fought to hide itself from his partner's expressive face. "But now I need you. You've given me so much, you keep me sane. You're the best thing in my life and I wasn't about to lose you over sex. That's not what this is about." A slight smile flitted across Jim's face before he added; "Well, mostly..."
Blair bent his head until his forehead rested against Jim's. "God, I love you Jim. The forever, 'til death do us part' kind of love. I know that it seems that I'm not real good at that, but with you I can be, I know it, and...." Now that Blair was speaking he couldn't seem to stop. Jim's confession of his need for him had broken the dam that had held his feelings back for so long. He only realized he was babbling when another soul searing kiss from Jim made him stop. The kiss stopped just short of asphyxiation as Jim drew back and looked deep into Blair's eyes. "I love you too Blair. With all that I am. Neither one of us has ever done well in the relationship department. Maybe it's because we weren't in the right relationship?" Blair felt he would either melt or burst into flames from the love and honesty pouring from Jim's eyes. He buried his head in the side of Jim's neck and held on tightly. When he could speak through the lump in his throat, he did so with out raising his head. "Upstairs now?" He heard Jim reply in the affirmative before he was lifted off his lap and placed gently on the floor.
The trip upstairs would be forever lost in a haze to Blair. The early afternoon sun gave a golden glow to the loft bedroom creating a surrealistic feel to the moment. When they reached the side of the bed, Blair's nerves gave one final showing and he became very interested in his shoes. Jim lifted his chin with a gentle hand and smiled at him. "I love you and you're beautiful. We can be beautiful. Let me show you?" Blair nodded.
Jim stepped back and for a moment Blair felt bereft. Then he watched in stunned silence as Jim's hands when to the tie of his robe, undoing it and letting the robe fall free of his body. Blair gasped at the perfection revealed to him. His hands reached out instinctively but stopped just before making contact. He had had to purposefully keep his hands off the body in front of him for so long, and old habits died hard. Jim, as always, seemed to understand his predicament and spoke softly. "That's it babe, touch me. Please."
Blair shuddered at the desire in those soft spoken words, and did just that. He gently laid the palms of his hands flat on Jim's chest and began to map the different textures to Jim's skin. He might not be a Sentinel, but he hadn't developed all those tests for this modern day version for
nothing. Silky smoothness covered hard muscles. A different texture on either side as he let his fingertips ghost over tiny wrinkled bits of flesh that hardened to dark pink points as he repeated the gesture. A small gasp that ended in a low growl above him made him raise head and hands. His eyes never lost contact with Jim's as he smoothed his hands across the beloved face. Soft, soft lips, hard determined jaw, smooth from recent shaving, fine hair cut short enough to feel like the most exquisite fur.
All the sensations overwhelmed him and he had to pull Jim's head down to his level for another kiss. As his mouth opened to invite his Sentinel's tongue in to play he felt Jim start to unbutton his shirt. Deft fingers made short work of the buttons and he had to untangle his hands from the back of Jim's neck so that he could be divested of his outer covering. Jim took advantage of the momentary separation to swiftly pull the t-shirt that had been under the flannel over Blair's head. Blair felt his hair fall back to his shoulders as the shirt was pulled free of his body. His skin was already exquisitely sensitized from Jim's heated gaze and the feather light touches the man's hands were trailing across his chest and upper arms. His own curls felt like a lover's caress as they tumbled down his back. His head tipped back and his eyes closed, the better to catalogue and enjoy the feelings. Suddenly his world canted gently backwards as Jim lay him across the bed. He felt the bed dip under Jim's weight and he opened lust heavy eye lids to see Jim above him, smiling down at him with so much love and need shining from his eyes Blair thought his heart would burst from the sight. Then he felt Jim's naked groin rock down onto his fleece covered one and he thought that maybe it wasn't his heart that was going to burst after all.
His startled "Oh!" was caught by Jim's mouth covering his. That same mouth began a nibbling, kissing journey towards his ear where a talented tongue swirled around and dipped in and out. Then he heard Jim begin to whisper in a low sultry voice, one he had never been the recipient of but wanted to hear much, much more of. "Gonna love you soooo good Blair." More tiny kisses and nips down his throat and around his shoulder. "Gonna touch you everywhere." Down further to a hard, aching nipple that was treated to a tongue bath of its' own. "Gonna make you scream." On that final word the bud was giving a small nip as Jim's hand snaked down and cupped Blair's balls, rolling them gently between his hard hand and the soft fleece lining of his sweats. The double stimulation was too much and Blair's world exploded as he arched and came, Jim's name a desperate brief shout from his lips.
Blair flung his hands over his face and felt the heat from his embarrassment warm his fingers as he tried to catch his breath. *Oh God. Off like a fire cracker, a short fuse and a big bang. Just let me die now...* After a moment he peeked out between slightly spread fingers, needing to see Jim but unwilling to face the derision he was sure to find. What he saw was Jim leaning over him with a huge, almost smug, grin on his face. Blair didn't know whether to kiss him or kick him and simply settled for mumbling behind his hands.
"Oh man. I haven't come in my pants since I was fifteen."
"I'll take that as a compliment.
"Please do."
Blair didn't realize that Jim had been neatly divesting him of his sweat pants during this exchange until Jim's head disappeared and seconds later he felt his Sentinel's tongue cleaning the evidence of his embarrassment from him with long cat like licks. When that talented tongue reached his balls his cock valiantly rose to the occasion once again.
"Woah!"
Jim stopped what he was doing, much to Blair's chagrin and looked up at him with a frown. "Woah?"
"Oh, no not woah as in "stop!" Woah as in I haven't gotten hard again this fast since I was fifteen either!"
"I'll take that as a compliment too."
"Now you're just being greedy. Get up here."
Jim slid up Blair's body until he was laying full length on top of him. Looking up into Jim's eyes, seeing that combination of fire and ice in their clear depths, he felt a rush of love and lust so overwhelming he simply couldn't contain it. He had to share. He reared up and latched his mouth onto the one above him. The taste of himself on Jim's lips and tongue only added fuel to the fire burning through him. He threw his head back, gasping for precious air as he spread his legs and wrapped them around his lover, drawing Jim's groin down to meet his. Two hard cocks, perfectly aligned, met and slid against once another in delicious friction. Blair felt as well as heard Jim's long low moan as it vibrated through the lips and teeth attached to his throat. As they moved in the simple harmony that governed their entire existence, Blair clutched at Jim and babbled words from his heart. "Love you Jim! Loveyouloveyouloveyou..." His heart soared even higher as he heard Jim's passion filled reply. "Love you too baby. Love you so much."
It lasted forever and was over all too soon. Jim thrust against Blair as if trying to physically meld with his Guide and Blair thrust up to meet him, giving as good as he was getting. At last with two short hard thrusts Jim went still and then shuddered as Blair felt his cock being bathed in Jim's warm seed. The feel of his lover's essence spreading between them triggered his own release. He collapsed back onto the mattress never letting go of Jim the hold of his arms and legs tightening as they rode out their earth shattering orgasms together. Long minutes later Jim spoke without raising his head from Blair's chest.
"We're gonna stick together."
Deliberately misconstruing Jim's words, Blair smiled as he petted the resting head. "Damn right we are."
Jim's soft chuckle followed him into the gentle darkness of sleep.
### The End ###