Title: Nooooooooooooooo!
Fandom: The Sentinel
Author: Ornery
Summary: Simon has a BAD morning!
Spoiler: none
Warning: Spew, Drabble, rampant silliness.
Disclaimer: I am not, have never been, nor do I ever intend to be ANYbody's Pet Fly.
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N ooo ooo ooo ooo ooo! #1
By Ornery
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Jim woke slowly, his mouth feeling like the inside of a cottonball, tasting like stale vomit. His head pounded, his whole body aching, and he was moaning.
<<giggle>>
//???// He dared to raise his head and felt his stomach lurch. //oh my god, never, ever again to i ever do what i did last night.//
*pause*
//what *did* i do last night//
<<giggle>>
//stop laughing at me//
<<giggle>>
//that's not Blair's voice//
*pause*
//that's Simon's voice//
*pause*
//Simon?//
He slowly but surely sat up, dialing down the ache in his skull and the taste in his mouth. He eased to his feet, and staggered downstairs to see his captain carefully shoving his skirt to one side so he could sit down comfortably.
*pause*
//skirt?//
"Uh, Simon?" Jim's voice was forbidding when he saw the huge rent along the hem, and beer stains on the bodice. "Tell me that's not my best dress!"
<<giggle>>
<<Snore>>
********************
TWO HOURS LATER
******************
Simon blinked blearly around at what appearred to be the loft. His eyes burned, his lips felt tacky, there was some sort of crub on his eyelids and smeared on his cheeks...it felt horrid. The sheet was tangled around his legs in what felt like a knot as his mind slowly and carefully came online. He sniffed himself, then gagged at the combination of sickeningly sweet perfume, alcohol-filled sweat, and stale beer.
//eeeeeeeewwww//
A threatening rumble in what sounded like Ellison's voice said something about a dress. //dress?// He looked down and froze in horror. //dress! i'm *wearing* a dress! oh god, i can't be wearing a damned skirt!//
Suddenly Jim grabbed him, stood him up and stripped him. He moaned in what sounded like sorrow at the rip in the hem, and glared at Banks.
"You tore it. My best watered blue silk dress! Do you know how much this *cost*?" Jim snarled. "You are *never* wearing my *good* clothes again!" He heard the younger cop tell him before he flounced to the bathroom, muttering what sounded a lot like endearments to the battered gown. "Now that I remember what we did last night, I'm going to make sure you wear cheap clothes. You get destructive when you're horny!"
Simon stood in his underwear in the middle of Jim's livingroom and tried to figure out just what the HELL was going on. Jim emerged from the bathroom bearing a basin in which he was soaking the disputed dress and glared woundedly at Simon.
"You stink. Go take a shower. Just for this, it'll be a lonnng time before I let you fuck me again! You'll have to make do with Rafe or Blair."
"I don't remember." Banks whispered, horrified.
"You don't remember? Simon, Blair took videos for the Gay Cop Performance Awards! YOU registered them and mailed them off at 3 a.m.!
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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Noooooooooooooooo! #2 NC-17
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Simon sat in a lump on the living room floor, his mind still reeling. He stared at the amused expression on Jim's face in growing horror as the other man grinned at him.
"It's really too bad you got so soused you can't remember last night, Simon. Your cock felt soooo good in my ass, mmmm." Ellison told the big captain, humming a bit in memory. And those little moles on the head rubbed right *on* my sweet spot!"
"Oh. My. God." Simon breathed.
"I was on my back with the backs of my knees pinned behind my elbows, wide open for you to have...are you sure you still don't remember?" Jim said as he fondled himself openly. Only then did Banks reaalize that Ellison had been quite naked all along. He licked suddenly dry lips as he watched Ellison stroke his already hard flesh, pulling at his balls with the other hand. In a trance, Simon slipped his hand inside his underpants to touch his own hardening shaft.
"Take off your underwear, Simon, let me see your dick." Jim commanded in a soft tone. He watched as Simon exposed himself, touching his dark length of aroused flesh. "You ate my ass for a long time last night before you buttfucked me." Jim informed him, "And your tongue felt sooo good in my hole. Blair sucked your balls while you ate me, and Rafe had his penis in my mouth...and you watched him fuck my mouth while you reamed me."
Banks crawled on all fours to Ellison, mouth opening and tongue reaching for the Sentinel's cock. He sucked it for a long time, on his knees between Jim's feet he serviced the younger cop. Wetly he slurped at Jim's sex, the loud moist sounds filled the loft. Soon, his dark head dipped lower to reach Jim's balls, licking and laving them eagerly as he listened to and savored Jim's pleased cries. He began to slowly back Jim toward the armchair, stopping at the last minute to look up into Jim's dazed eyes.
"Turn around, spread yourself." He instructed watching as Jim obeyed, a moment later Bank's huge hands had Ellison's buttocks spread wide and his tongue deep in the other man's hole.
He ass ate the detective for a good half an hour before mounting him in urgent need of his own...hips thrust his nine inch dick deep into Jim's tight ass. Both of them were too far gone to be gentle and Banks' fucked Jim Ellison HARD....
"Oh God!" Simon gasped.
"Simon."
"Sooo close...."
"Simon!"
"Gonna cum!"
*pantpantpantpantpant*
"SIMON! Damn it, wake up!" A loud voice finally got his attention and Simon Banks opened dazed eyes to stare up at Sandburg from where he lay on the couch at the loft. "Are you okay, man? That must've been one hell of a dream!"
"NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"