Title: Distracting Jim

Author/pseudonym: Margaret Newman

Fandom: The Sentinel

Pairing: Jim/Blair

Rating: PWP, PG-13

Status: new

Archive: sure, just let me know where

E-mail address for feedback: mereridkat@aol.com

Series/Sequel: no

Other websites: nope

Disclaimers: I don't own these guys, not making any money, just having fun.

Notes: not beta'd, the first TS story I've posted.

Summary: Blair distracts Jim with "Great Truths About Life That Little Children Have Learned" list.

Warnings: Wrote this for fun. Nobody dies, no actual sex.

Blair looked over at Jim who was reading some policeman's newsletter thingy. He was frowning, body looking rather tense. Blair nodded to himself, yep. Just what the doctor - or at least, former grad student who almost had a phd - ordered.

"Hey, Jim. This is funny. Did you know that no matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats?" He stared at the computer screen, but he could have read this list from memory. "Who would want to baptize a cat? Except maybe a really devout Baptist."

He heard Jim shift around on the couch, probably throwing him a disgruntled look. He kept the smile hidden.

"I never really experienced this one. Did you? I imagine you must have had some hair as a kid. When your Mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair. Now if that had said 'when your mom is mad at her live-in boyfriend, don't let her brush your hair', I could relate. Been there, done that. It's why I learned very early to brush my own hair."

"Sandburg." Jim growled in frustration.

"If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person." Blair frowned as if considering this. "Neither one of us had a sister. Maybe it works for brothers too?"

"I am reading an article over here, Sandburg." Jim grumped, turning the page on the newsletter. "Shut up."

"Never ask your 3-year-old brother to hold a tomato." Blair laughed, leaning back in his chair. "Now, I don't have a little brother, but I have experienced this one. When I was dating Julie, you never met Julie because she was someone I dated in my undergraduate years, but she had a little boy, Jerry. He was cute little guy. We were going to make a salad-"

"Sandburg." Jim hissed, throwing the newsletter down on the coffee table.

"-and I handed him the tomato to carry to the counter, and before he got halfway there, it was mush." He laughed, shaking his head. "You ever have a pet growing up? Mostly, we had farm animals. I had a pet bunny once. Never had a dog. You think-"

"No." Jim growled.

"Okay, okay." Blair sighed. "Well, I believe this one without having previous experience. You can't trust dogs to watch your food."

"Can't trust your best friend either." Jim grumbled. "He'll stick sprouts in your Wonder Burger."

"Hey, that was a one time thing. And you asked for it." Blair glanced around at him. Jim was leaning back against the couch now, hands clasped behind his head. "How about this one? Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot."

"What list is this? Are you done yet?"

"Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair." Blair laughed.

"Shut up." Jim warned him for good measure. He knew there was a Jim-hair joke in there somewhere.

"Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac." Blair laughed again. "So do donkeys."

"I don't want to know." Jim sighed.

"Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time. Yow! I can imagine!" Blair gave up the pretense of reading the list off the computer. He turned in his seat to watch Jim. "You wanna test that theory?"

"No." Grunt.

"Oh, this one I have experience with. School lunches stick to the wall." He scooted to the edge of his seat, his right leg jumping as his foot did nervous tapping.

"Yeah." Jim sighed, short nod of his head. "Me, too."

"Really? You?" Blair gave up and stood, walking over to the backside of the couch.

"Yeah, and no. I'm not telling you about it." Jim opened one eye to look up at Blair.

"You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk." Blair smiled down at him. "Can't hide sprouts in it either."

"It was only the one time." Jim sniffed disdainfully, closing his eye.

Blair eased a little closer to the big guy. "Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts. No matter how cute the underwear is." He chuckled. "I learned this one but not with polka-dot underwear. I believe they were black with red hearts on them."

"You don't have any underwear like that now." Jim frowned, mentally reviewing Blair's underwear inventory. "Though you do have an interesting pair of black silk thong..."

Blair grinned mischievously. He leaned down to whisper in Jim's ear. "I have those on now."

Before he could pull back, he was grabbed and expertly flipped. The next thing he knew, he was laying across Jim's lap on the couch. A questing hand was plucking at the top button of his jean cutoffs. Jim arched an eyebrow at him. Blair smiled back, clasped his hands above his head and winked up at the big guy.

"Double dare ya." Blair challenged him. It was the quickest he had ever been de-pantsed in his life.

END