Tittle: Dance with you
Author: Selena
Fandom: Sentinel
Pairing: Jim/Blair implied
Rating: Gen
Warnings: Jumbled thoughts, introspective. Slightly AU. This is my first ever songfic, I don't know if it turned out right, I just know it turned out. Plus it's my first ever S2 fic, you have been warned.
Summery: This is inspired by the song Dance with you by Live. I always thought I would never write a songfic because I was never sure quite how. But this song moves me and I think it is kind of fitting. Lyrics follow the story. These are Jim’s thoughts on the beach at Santa verde. Both Alex and Blair are present, but they don't say anything.
Disclaimer: They all belong to petfly, I bow to the gods for creating them.
Dance with you
by Selena
I'm sitting here and this all but deserted beach, looking out to the ocean. This last week has been nothing but a nightmare. When I think just how close I came to losing everything, to losing Sandburg.
I want to scream.
But right now, in this moment it all feels like a distant memory, and all I feel is bliss and love. I am here with the two people I am most connected to. My fellow Sentinel, Alex, is asleep. Her head cradled in my lap. All the anger and rage she clings to in the waking hours, slowly ebbed out of her as she gave into exhaustion. Now she looks like an Angel, and a warrior Goddess all in one.
Blair sits off to my right. I can feel his presence and am grateful for it. I know that all of the demons that I collected within myself since my Sentinel journey started, have been cast out. And replaced with real love.
Oh God would you listen to me, I sound like one of those corny hallmark cards. If only Sandburg could hear me now, he would probably gag. Especially if he knew the source of the love I now feel. I thank every Deity that I have ever heard him mention, and I bless my spirit guide for giving him back to me. I know that he may think this the other way round, but I know that he is the one that saved me. If he had died at the fountain, I know without a doubt that I would have died too.
In the distance I can hear music, the gentle lullaby soothes me and I can feel myself start to sway in time with the melody. Blair watches me quizzically, but I just smile back at him. And I am hit with the urge to gather him in my arms and dance with him. Dance a lovers dance, follow the stars home to a world where people can live and die with grace and never fear of being judged because of who they give their hearts too.
Blair is always talking about his past lives and karma. Well I must have done something damn special in my last life to deserve him in this one.
Hah, listen to me, I think I've gone soft.
No not soft, I'm in love. I know that now. But it shouldn't have taken something like this to make me realize that.
Blair has been very still, very quiet since I took the gun away from Alex. I can feel the trust he has in me. He thinks that I will not let Alex hurt him again, and I hope to all the Gods that he is right. Because right now, the urge to protected her is as strong as my love for him. One look into Blair's blue eyes is enough to tell me that I don't know anything about what will happen when she wakes up. I don't know what will happen in the next few days, the next hour. Or even the next moment. But I do know that whatever I do, it will be with Blair Sandburg at my side.
In my life I have been every where, done many things. But I never would have guessed that I would find my greatest love and my boldest hope right at home, in my own back yard. Blair found me a sick and twisted mess, a man who threatened him with bodily harm. And still he saved me, showed me the way. I don't know of another human being who would do that for me. And I repay him by letting the woman I am holding so gently now, kill him.
But here now, on this beach we are together. Alex shifts slightly and smiles. She is free now, there is nothing left for her. I know somewhere deep down I love her. But when she wakes up we are going to have a little talk about nerve gas. I will let no harm come to her, but she will never be allowed to harm anyone I care about ever again.
One last time I look at Blair. And in my mind we are still dancing together. When we get home I am going to make sure that he knows exactly what he means to me. Well maybe not exactly. But I am going to make sure that he knows that if he even thinks about dying on me again, I will kill him.
Lyrics.
Sittin' on the beach
the island king of love
deep in Fijian seas
deep in some blissful dream
where the goddess finally sleeps
in the lap of her lover
subdued in all her rage
and I'm aglow with the taste
of demons driven out
and happily replaced
with the presence of real love
the only one who saves
I wanna dance with you
see a world where people
live and die with grace
the karmic ocean dried up and leave no trace
I wanna dance with you
see a sky filled with stars
that changed our minds
lead us back to a world we would not face
The stillness in your eyes
convinces me that I
I don't know a thing
and I've been around the world
and I've tasted all the wines
a half a billion times
came sickened to your shores
you showed me what this life is for
I wanna dance with you, etc
In this altered state
full of such pain and rage
you know we've got to find away
to let it go
Sittin' on the beach
the island king of love
deep in Fijian seas
deep in the heart of it all
where the goddess finally sleeps
after eons of war and lifetimes
she is smiling and free
nothing left but a cracking voice and a song of love
I wanna dance with you, etc.