By Rebekah Black
This is just a parody, no more, no less.
WARNING: Written at midnight, while under the influence of an OD on Pamprin, and Un-betaed. But thanks are due to Ihk and Jo Ann for telling me the name of the movie this is sorta based on (hint: I modeled the title after it), and to Ihk again because her chat room beach story is what gave me this cute little plot bunny.
Oh, and a disclaimer: I own nothing but the words. Jim, Blair, and simon are all property of Pet Fly Productions, Paramount (uck), and/or possibly Scifi. I don't know. From Here to Eternity is the property of some movie studio or another. No infringement intended.
FROM HERE TO THERE
By Rebekah Black
Blair smiled dreamily. The grainy sand felt...grainy against his feet, and the gentle ocean tide lapped at his calves like the blue-green tongue of some great beastie. The warm summer sun caressed him gently, and so did the wind. The idyllic scene was quiet but for the soothing sound of the waves - the beach was deserted on a perfectly nice day, for some reason or another. It was a perfect place for "making up" with his lover Jim. Repeatedly.
Turning, he saw the man of his wet dreams at the other end of the beach. Jim looked resplendent in a snug blue speedo that left little to the imagination. He was smirking in that sexy way of his, and attempting to look impressive. And Blair was impressed - particularly his dick, which had begun to sit up and was waving at Jim. Blair grinned, and began to run towards Jim, and Jim did the same (uh, only he was running to Blair).
They were running more slowly than usual, of course, but neither of them seemed to mind. For they knew that soon their bodies would be entwined, their tongues touching, their hands exploring...
But then, Blair slipped on a wet rock. It was a tiny rock, really, about the size of one's fingernail, but it was in the exact spot that would send Blair sprawling, head first, onto the sand.
"Ow!" Blair shouted. "GodDAMN it."
Jim ran to his side, simply dripping with concern. "Are you ok?" he asked, running slim hands over Blair in order to check for injuries.
"Sure," Blair murmured, accident forgotten. He pulled Jim's head down to his for a kiss. Jim pounced on Blair, and they began rolling on the sand, buffeted by the surf. Blair could hear swelling, dramatic music in his ears if he listened hard enough, but that could have been a result of his fall.
Then, a tiny snapping turtle attached itself to Jim's speedo-clad ass. Jim screamed, in a matter not fitting with his usual macho demeanor. (Rather like a little girl, in fact.) "Get this damn thing off me!!"
Blair grabbed the turtle by its shell, and gently pulled him off Jim and set the creature in the surf. "Chill, man, it's just a little turtle."
"You wouldn't say that if it was biting *your* ass."
Blair grinned, and stepped into Jim's personal space again. Soon, they were making out in the surf again. This turned out to be a mistake: a jelly fish, carried by the waves, landed on Blair's upturned back. And bit him.
Blair was in too much pain to scream, but he let out a really loud moan. "Damn it, Jim," he muttered through gritted teeth. "I'm never having sex on the beach with you again."
"Sorry," Jim said, picking Blair up and starting back for the car. "But it was my turn to pick the scene, you know."
"Next time," Blair promised with a devilish grin, "we're reenacting a scene from Pulp Fiction. And you, my friend, will be the gimp."
END!!