Addicted

By Kena

not beta read just spell checked

takes place after TSbyBs so he is a cop in this story

ADDICTED

By Kena

"Jim calm down." Said Simon as Jim paced back and forth in Simon's office.

"Where is he Simon? I don't know what else to do or where else to look. I just feel so damn helpless."

'' We all do, Jim,". said Simon.

"No you don't," yelled Jim. "I'm his partner. Me not you or anybody else. I have felled him. What if he doesn't come back, Simon ? What then? What will become of me. I love him, Simon."

"We all do Jim. He is like family to us all here in Major crimes."

"No, Simon I'm in love with him. I'm in love with Blair."

Simon didn't say any thing at first. Finally after taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly Simon said "Jim, I had no idea"

"Don't feel bad, Simon Blair doesn't know either."

"Jim when did this happen?" said Simon.

Jim rubbed a hand across his face. " When I saw him in that fountain. I thought I had lost him. I felt like my world was over. I knew if I lost him my life was not worth living. "Simon we have got to find him. I feel like I'm dying inside. I can't take much more of this not knowing."

Just then Jim's cell phone rang.

"Ellison. Roses are red violets are blue your partners addicted and it all because of you."

"Who is this? What have you done to Blair? Answer me you son of a bitch"

All Jim heard was laughing. Jim turned up his hearing trying to hear anything in the background that could lead him to Blair. Jim finally picked up Blairs voice.

"Please give it to me please. Please I need it."

The voice then said " Will be in touch. Oh and have goodnight Ellison"

"What did they say Jim?"

"Some poem said that Blair was addicted and it was all because of me. I picked up Blair's voice in the background. He was begging for something. They said they will be in touch. Oh God Simon we have got to find him."

*********

"Please give it to me please. Please I need it." said Blair.

"What do you need Sandburg? Come on say it or you want get it." The man was teasing Blair. By holding a needle with heroin in it in front of Blair's face. "Come on Sandburg look at you. You don't look so good poor baby. All you have to do is so what you need."

"I I need the heroin."

"Now that wasn't so hard was it ?" The man then turned and handed the needle to one of his men. " Give it to him.

"He is out of it. What now, Mr. Beckett?"

"We will keep him one more day. Then will dump him out on the street. To bad we will not see Ellison's face when he finds Sandburg here is a junkie. And it is all his fault. I hope it eat's him up inside. Just like when I found out that my baby brother was killed in prison after Ellison busted him ."

************

"Jim you have got to go home and get some sleep. you are dead on your feet." said Simon.

" I can't Simon. I know Blair's out there and he need's me."

" I know that Jim, but you are only human. You have to get some sleep, so when we find him you will be there for him."

"You don't understand Simon It's not home without Blair there, I I can't sleep without him there. I miss his heart beat. It's just I can't explain it Simon. "

Simon just shock his head. "You have got bad don't you Jim?"

"More than you will ever know."

***************

"How is our poor little junkie doing?"

"Not to well Mr. Beckett He's really hurting."

"Good I think it's time we send our friend here back into the world."

"Where do you want us to dump him?"

" Put him out in the warehouse district. That way we will be long gone before he is found."

"Let me see him one more time before he leaves."

Blair was already starting to go into withdrawal. Beckett jerked Blair's head back by his ponytail. " How are you doing my friend?"

"Not to well by the way you are looking. Isn't that to bad?" he laughed.

"Pl pl please give me so some I need it ."

"Sorry, my friend. You are on your own. Get this trash out of hear."

Blair fell forward as Beckett let his hair go.

**************

Blair was put into the back sit of the car.

"He's really hurting, Hugh?"

"Yeah. You get in the back with him make sure he doesn't try anything."

"Hey, cop, what do you think your friends are going to think of you when they find you? Answer me, cop"

Blair was then slapped across the face .

"I'm talking to you "

Another slap.

"What.... what..." said Blair.

Blair then grabbed the doorhandle open the door and jumped.

The driver slammed on breaks. "What the hell happened?"

"He jumped. Let's get out of here before we gather anymore people's attention."

They spead off.

***************

"Ellison" Jim yelled into the phone.

"Look to left, look to the right, your partner's in real trouble, and your no where in sight. "

Listen to me you SOB I ."

"No you listen to me. It's not to fun when your freinds are in trouble and you feel helpless to do anything. Pay back is hell, isn't it, Ellison." The phone went dead.

"What did he say this time, Jim?"

"Pay back is hell and Blair is in real trouble. " Jim kicked over the chair he had been sitting in.

"Listen up, Jim you have to take control of your emotions. If not, you are just playing into their hands. Got it?" Simon yelled. "I said ."

"I heard you, Simon And yeah I got it."

****************

Brown and Rafe were driving back from lunch when the spotted Blair stumbling down an alleyway.

"I'll go after him . You call Simon, Rafe. Don't put it over the radio. That's all Blair needs is more things people can hold up against him."

"Banks."

" Captain? Rafe, Brown and I spotted Blair in the alley behind Wonder Burger."

"We are on the way "

Rafe took of in a run to find Brown. Rafe went into the alley. There he saw Brown looking behind a dumpster.

Rafe yelled, "did you....?"

Brown motion for Rafe to be quiet.

Rafe walked slowly up to the dumpster.

There he saw Blair wide-eyed, shaking and rocking back and forth. "Damn H look at his arm's . There track marks."

***************

"Jim slow down before you get us both killed."

Jim never slowed down. Jim was out of the truck before it came to a complete stop. Both he and Simon ran down the ally where Rafe and Brown were standing.

"Chief." Jim knelt down so he was eye level with Blair. Jim reached out to touch Blair.

Blair jerked backed and whimpered.

"Oh God chief what have I done to you ?"

Blair was hugging himself and rocking back and forth staring at nothing.

"H, go call an ambulance."

"Simon, no," Jim snapped. "Simon, if this gets back to the brass, Blair will not have a chance in hell of staying with the department. You know they are just waiting for Blair to screw up.''

"So what do you propose we do then? Look at him, Jim. He's already in withdrawals. From the look of the track marks they had him pumped to the hilt."

"I'll take care of him."

"Jim do you know what you are saying?"

"Yeah, I do."

" It won't be easy."

"I know that, Simon."

"We both have vacation time coming to us we will use it know so no one will be any wiser."

"Jim, whoever did this are still out there. You can't go home they could be waiting for you."

"Just give me a minute to think, Simon."

"Jim, I don't think Blair has a minute to spare."

"My Dad has a cabin I...I can use. Blair and I went fishing there last year. It's in the middle of nowhere. It will be perfect. "

Jim called his Dad. "Thanks Dad."

"Well?'

"Said it was fine. Said that he had it restocked last week . So we are good to go."

"I'll drive you Jim and Rafe and Brown can follow in your truck."

" Thanks guy's. OK chief let's role."

Blair never looked up at Jim. He just keep rocking. Jim reached out for Blair he jerked away.

"Come on, Chief. It's me. Jim. "

"No...No....No."

Jim picked Blair up and carried him to Rafe's car. Jim sat in the back seat with Blair laying across his lap. Blair was sweating and shaking. Every once in a while Blair would moan. "Just hang in there chief, Just hang on," Jim whispered as he stroked his hand over Blair's head over and over again.

Jim gave Simon directions to the cabin. Neither Simon or Jim spoke for a long time.

Finally Simon spoke. " Jim, are you sure about this? Do you think you can handle Blair on your own?"

"I have no other choice, Simon. You know the press would have a field day with this. We just got the press to quiet down about the sentinel book stuff. I don't want put Blair through that again. No way, Simon No way"

"Ok as long as you know what you are getting yourself into."

" I know it is going to be hell, but he is my life and we will get through this together."

Blair started gagging.

"Simon pull over Blair's getting sick."

Simon pulled over a fast as he could. Jim helped Blair out of the car and onto the side of the road. Blair threw up until there was nothing left and he was dry heaving. Simon helped Jim get Blair back into the car.

"Come on, kid, just hang in there You are tough," said Simon. ""He doing better Jim?"

"Yeah," Jim said as his voice cracked.

Simon looked in the rear-view mirror at Jim . He saw tear's running down Jim face . Simon just shook him head and kept driving.

***********

Blair was moaning and starting to thrash about.

"Hang on, chief, we are almost there."

" Jim do I need to pull over again?"

"No, Simon. The sooner we get there the better."

"When we get there I'll send H and Rafe back to the store we just passed to get you and Blair some cloths."

"Thanks. I didn't even think about that."

"We still have no idea who did this, Jim, and you can't hide up here forever."

"I know. When Blair gets with the program so to speak I'll get what I can out of him. See what he remembers, but my main concern right know is just to get him clean of the drugs and then I'll go from there. I will get who did this, Simon. Mark my word but Blair comes first."

****************

"Simon the extra key to the cabin Dad say's is hidden under the rock to the right of the front door."

Simon gave Jim a look like you have to be kidding.

"I know not the smartest thing to do."

Simon found the key and unlocked the door. Jim carried Blair into the cabin and laid him down on the couch. Jim wrapped Blair with the blanket from the back of the couch.

"Jim you go make up a bed for him and I'll start a fire. Don't worry I won't leave him alone for one minute. Scout's honor "

"Simon I know you were never a scout," Jim laughed. "I Don't know how to thank you for helping us. For understanding what I feel for Blair and not being judgmental of me. It really means a lot to me you are a true friend." Jim gave Simon a hug.

"Anything for a friend Jim anything for a friend. Now go make up that bed so I can get a fire started. So you two don't freeze."

********************

"Here come Rafe and Brown time for me to go. Are you sure you will be ok out here?"

"Yeah. Remember I have survived for 18 months in the jungle. How hard can this be?"

Simon just looked at Jim.

"Simon, I'm not fooling myself it's going to be a living hell. Blair has the hard part."

"I don't know, Jim. Seeing someone you love hurting and there is nothing you can do to take the pain away sounds pretty hard to me."

"Here you go, Jim. Rafe and me got you guy's a couple pair of sweat suits underwear and tooth brushes ."

"Thanks guy's for everything and I mean everything."

"No problem Jim. Just take care of Hairboy."

"I will. I promise." Jim waved to them as the drove off. "Well chief I guess it's just you me."

***************

Jim went into the kitchen to fix some coffee when he heard Blair moaning. He went to check on Blair. He found Blair tossing and turning Turing to throw the blanket off of himself. "Easy chief."

"Hot ...m...hot."

"Let me help you get it off."

Blair was sweating profusely. Jim went into the bathroom and got a cool wet towel to wipe Blair off with.

"Hot hot "

" I know, Chief. This will help make you feel better."

Blair tried to push Jim's hand away.

"Easy, Chief. Let me get you cleaned up a little. You will feel better."

*************

"Come on chief you need to drink something so you don't get dehydrated."

Blair slapped the cup of tea away from his face.

"Chief, you really need this. you will feel worse if you don't get something into you stomach." f

Finally Blair drank a few swallows of the tea.

"Now, don't you feel better?"

"No, I don't just leave me alone."

"Sorry, no can do, Chief. I'm in this for the long hall. Now drink the rest of the tea for me and I will leave you alone for at least a little while."

Blair drank the rest of the tea. "Happy? Blair snapped.

"You bet, Chief."

****************

" Jim help me I think I'm going to be." At that Blair rolled over and threw up on the floor by the couch.

"Chief, hang on."

Jim carried Blair into the bathroom. Jim held Blair's hair out of his face as he preceded to throw up into the toilet.

"Oh, God, it hurts, Jim. Make it stop." Blair started to dry heave.

"Chief, if I could make it stop I would. It's just going to take sometime to get this stuff out of your system." Jim gave Blair a glass of water to rinse his mouth out with. "Think your ready to go lay back down?"

"Yeah, but no more tea."

"All right, Chief. No more tea, at least for a while."

*************

"Alright chief into bed you go."

Blair collapsed onto the bed.

"Just rest chief. I'm going to go clean up the bathroom and living room then I will come back and check on you. Think you will be OK for a few minutes ?"

Blair just moaned.

"I will take that as a yes." Jim cleaned up the mess and took a quick shower.

******************

"Did you miss me chief?"

Blair rolled over and looked at Jim. He then went into convulsions.

"Oh Jesus Christ, chief, hang on." Jim got onto the bed with Blair and wrapped his arms around Blair. "Just hang on chief it will be O.K. You just hang on. Don't you leave me. Do you hear me? Don't you dare leave me. You are my life Blair. Do you hear me?"

The convulsion finally slowed then stopped. It seem to Jim that it went on forever. Jim put both hands on Blairs face. "Chief, are you with me now? Can you hear me?"

Blair just moaned and tried to push Jim's hands away from his face.

"That's right chief you just keep fighting. We have a long way to go, but we will make you can bet on that.".

Jim stayed with Blair for the rest of the night. Blair was in and out of conscious through out the night. Jim didn't sleep. He held Blair all night long. He talked to Blair in a calming voice. " It's OK chief we will get through this. Your strong you can make it. Don't let the basterds get the best of you the best of us. I know I'm your blessed protector and that I have failed you. I am so sorry chief. I would take the pain for myself if I could. I'm here for you. Just like you have been there for me."

At sunrise.

"Jim y...you awake ?"

"Yeah. How are you doing chief?"

" I'm still here if that means anything ."

"To me chief that does mean a lot."

"Oh God, Jim I feel like shit."

"Well, Chief, I hate to tell you this to you, but you do look like shit." Jim started to get out of the bed.

Jim where are you go...going ?"

"To the bathroom. Would you care to join me?"

"Jim, could you help me? I don't think I can make it on my own."

"Sure take it nice and easy. Up we go."

Blair swayed a bit before he got his feet under him. "Man this really sucks. Thanks, Jim, but I think I can handle the rest myself."

Jim helped Blair get set on the couch. "You OK, Chief?"

Blair just shrugged his shoulders.

"How about something to eat?"

Blair just shook his head no.

"You have got to eat something."

Blair turned over on his side and pulled the covers up to his shoulders.

Jim just shook his head and went about fixing breakfast for the both of them. "Breakfast is served." Jim brought a tray of toast and oj over to Blair. Jim noticed that Blair was covered in a fine sheen of sweat. "Come on Blair you need to get something in your stomach."

"Just leave me alone. If I wanted something to eat I would ask for it or fix it myself.' Blair yelled as he flung the cover off himself as he tried to stand up and staggered and fell to the floor.

Jim ran up and tried to help Blair but, he pushed Jim's hands away.

"Oh, God, Jim, it hurts."

"I know chief."

"Then get me something."

"I can't Blair."

"I thought you c...cared about me." Blair yelled.

"I do care about you. I...I lo.. ."

"Make this stop Jim. I can't take this anymore. Please help me."

Jim helped Blair up from the floor.

Blair shook himself from Jim's grip. "I can take care of myself."

I can tell Jim thought to himself.

"I don't need your help." Blair stormed into the bedroom and slammed the door.

Jim listened as Blair threw himself on the e bed. Blair's breath evened out. Jim knew he was asleep.

"Dammit." Jim said as he sat down on the couch.

END PART 11