In Remembrance of Times Past

by Shamenka

From: Shamenka@aol.com

Disclaimer: Not my show, just my story.

Sex: None what so ever ... well, one a little hint or two!

Archive: If you really wish to at Herc-slash



In Remembrance of Times Past
by Shamenka

It was a freak moment, suspended for always in his memory. The very moment of his death. The cold that filled him soul deep was beyond mortal words to describe. The pain it was pushing away was fading to a distant memory. Death, his death, something he had never feared, in truth never envisioned happening to him.

This had been a fight like any other fight. The bad-guys surrounding him, swords drawn, Attacking in ones and twos, striking out and running away. What else was new? Nothing, this was a battle like any other he had had in his long career as a hero. A hero? That was not how he saw himself. Least of all as a dead hero.

If this was his destiny, to spill out his life in a lonely wood, trying to save some peasants too frightened to fight for themselves, then it sucked, royally! Not normally given to bitterness this was perhaps his last chance in life to give vent to his inner anger he had kept suppressed for so long. Denying himself the extremes of emotion, love was as dangerous for him as anger ever could be. But who could deny him now? Now that he was knocking on deaths door.

A voice called to him, he could hear it, understand it and could all but ignore it too! Yet, it kept drawing him towards it. Forcing him to think about answering it.

"Herc? Herc, you still with me? Stay with me buddy, stay with me! You listening to me? Stay here with me!" It was Iolaus. And he was upset. Why was he upset? Life began and life ended, why should he be any different?

Suddenly he became aware of another presence. Who else had been there? A couple of the villagers, the villains of course and ... and who? Oh, Joxer, yes, he remembered now. And that voice he could hear was Joxer talking to someone, no, he was praying to someone, some God infact. What was he saying?

"....your last chance, you gotta take it. You told me what you remembered, now sort it out. Please! Only you can do this now. Only you know what happened back then. Only you have the power to sort it all out! If you don't what'll happen when he's dead and it's too late to do anything?"

Hercules lay back not caring to whom his erstwhile friend was talking to. Not really caring that Iolaus was still trying, in vain, to stop the bleeding. The cold gave way to a sudden burst of pure warm energy. A light filled his eyes, his heart, his very soul. So bright, so powerful, so silent.

Vaguely, in the distance he could hear Iolaus' astonished voice cry out in alarm.

"Ares?"

"You have an objection to me helping MY brother? Huh?" Ares was helping him? Why? Granted they were brothers but they had never been close. Bearly tolerated each other in fact. And now Ares was helping him? Saving him?

Another voice spoke out, angry. He tried to place it and succeeded all too well. It was Hades, he was shouting at Ares. Annoyed with him. That was nothing new, sometimes it seemed like everyone was always annoyed with Ares. Sometimes he wondered how his brother put up with it. All that bad feeling, no wonder he was bitter. Had he always been bitter? Ares was talking, arguing with their uncle for him. For his life!

"Look Hades, I agreed to not take anymore souls out of your domain. But my brother was not dead yet. And if I have my way here, he won't be dead. Okay? You can try taking this to dad, but hey, for once he'll be on my side. Fancy that, he'll be so happy to defend me for saving his precious Hercules' life. What sweet irony."

"Don't bandy words with me Ares!" Hades did sound more than angry with Ares. Not that he cared, he was still alive, Ares was right. And he so wanted to go on living. "His soul was almost out of his body, only a God could save him at that moment. You interfered."

"Wait a moment here. I saved my brother at the point of death, because I'm a God and only a God could do this? What is your problem here?" Oh his brother sounded so angry, so confused. Didn't Hades see he was trying to help? If he could get his tongue working he'd soon tell Uncle Hades.

"But why did you save him? What's he to you? That level of interference is reserved for avowed believers. This is Hercules we're talking about. Hand him over, let him die. He is mine." His Uncle would really do that to him? What argument could Ares have against that?

"I interfered as you put it, in my own brother's death at the request of my truest most avowed believer. Okay? Protocol taken care of?" If he could laugh he would, the sarcasm simply dripped caustic flames from Ares' lips. What did it matter why he was doing it, he was saving a life. His or someone else's, Hades shouldn't be trying to dissuade Ares, he should be encouraging him to do what is right more often.

"Your 'avowed' believer? Don't make me laugh. And which of your blood thirsty Warlords would want Hercules alive?"

"Ah, but I never said my 'avowed' believer was a Warlord did I?" He could hear his brother taking a deep breath. "It just so happens my avowed believer is Joxer. And Joxer is here, he asked for my help and in answer to his prayer I'm helping."

"NO!" Hades raged at Ares. Why? What had his brother done in trying to save his life? What wrong could be seen in that?

He could feel the crackle of energy as Hades pulled a massive amount of energy together. He could feel the buzz of that same energy as Ares pulled his together too.

"Do it Ares! You have to do it now!" What was it Joxer knew about this situation that he himself didn't?

"Stay out of this mortal!" Hades snarled at Joxer.

"See you on the other side!" With those cryptic words Ares kissed his brother's startled face and he felt the War Gods power infuse him. He blacked out at the intensity of it.

****
When he awoke he was still in a wooded area, but not where he had been injured. Checking his belly he saw that he was healed and clean and his clothes were fixed up. Was this his brother's way of helping? Getting him away from Hades, far away until their uncle could calm down? Why had Hades been so keen to see him die? He thought he had had a good relationship with Hades. What had he missed?

Getting to his feet he took stock of his surroundings. He looked, he listened and was amazed to hear the sounds of a child crying. Not crying. Screaming was closer, hysterical was another good word. Without conscious thought Hercules, the hero, headed for the source of the distress.

Once there he saw a young boy, perhaps four years old, perhaps a little older, he was facing Cerberus. Hades' dog? What was he doing there? The child was backed up against a tree beating at Hades' evil beast with a hide wrapped package. Screaming for his father. Looking around him, Hercules saw no one else. The child was screaming in vain. Where ever his father was, he was nowhere near to hear him in his moment of greatest need.

With out further pause for thought Hercules looked around and saw a slim tree branch, broken off to a sharp point. Picking it up he advanced on the Tartaran guard dog and when close enough he plunged the sharpened end into the dog's chest, piercing its black heart.

Cerberus disappeared in a shower of golden sparkles and the child slumped to the ground. Still crying, but never letting his bundle drop from his hands. Hercules stood there, for some reason unable to speak to this child, at least until the child would speak to him first.

"I thought, this time I'm dead!" The voice was light, strangely adult sounding, teasingly familiar. The child looked up at him and Hercules was more than certain he should know this child whose pale face was shrouded with thick, black curly hair and contained a pair of hypnotic, dark, lively eyes. Then the child spoke again. "A goner, for sure, ya know?" And the way he said it. Hercules had hear it said so often before. 'See you on the other side.' Were exactly Ares' words.

"Ares?" The child's head shot up, alarm clearly visible on the child-god's face. "Easy, I won't harm you. But, you are Ares, aren't you?" The eyes that looked at him, searching his face, his heart, even his soul were not the eyes of a normal four or five year old child.

"Yes. How did you know?" The language for one thing, his level of comprehension was way too advanced for such a young child.

"Believe me we've met before, but no way would you remember me. My name is Hercules." And so saying he held out his hand to his brother and waited to be either accepted or rejected. Ares slowly took the pro-offered hand as if unused to such courtesy. At least from strangers.

"Hello Hercules. I'm Ares, God of War, well ... will be, when I grow up a bit. Dad says I'm still too small. Mamma says I'll still be too young if I was twice as big!" Ares would-be-God-of-War grinned at his rescuer. His rescuer couldn't help it, he grinned right back at him.

"So, what was with Cerberus going for you like that? You been in Hades' domain tormenting the beast? Or what?" Hercules had meant to make his 'little' brother laugh or at least smile, not bring back a ghost of his former terror.

"No. Hades wants my sword. It's mine! I was born to this sword, and he want's it." Ares held his scruffy, leather bound bundle tighter, and as he spoke Hercules realised this was Ares' actual sword of power the child-god was almost tripping up over.

"Why does he want the sword?" Hercules placed a gentle hand on the child-gods shoulders and eased him away from the tree he still sheltered near. "I think we ought to get away from here before Hades comes to see how you killed his precious pet, or he re-animates him and sends him back for another go!" And so saying he directed his brother to safer ground.

"He doesn't want to be God of the Dead, he want's to be God of everything. He hates daddy, him and Poseidon. They hate daddy just because daddy beat grandfather, and they couldn't!" The hero worship Ares' voice held for 'his daddy' warmed Hercules' soul. Something they both shared, if the child but knew it, they both loved and worshipped their father.

"How do we get you home then?" Safe ground. Safe topic Hercules thought.

"I don't know where I am. Unless I know where I am I can't get myself back. Hades dumped me and sent his dog to eat me." His brother began to tremble under his guiding hand, making Hercules feel uncharacteristically protective of his brother.

"Well then, we walk until we find someplace you do know! Can't you contact da .. your daddy? He could get you home!" He looked down into the upturned earnest face of the young will-be God of War and saw tears forming, but unshed in those so achingly familiar eyes.

"I can't 'feel' him. I think Hades has done something to the world around here. I can't feel daddy, and daddy won't be able to feel me!" Ares was doing his best to not cry. He scrubbed at his face, as if to wipe away all his unshed tears. "War Gods don't cry!" He was so adamant that Hercules had to laugh, softly.

"They do if they are what, four, five? Frightened, just survived an attack by Cerberus? Oh, I think even heroes would cry under those circumstances." He smiled, letting the warmth reach his eyes.

"What are heroes?" Ares just looked perplexed. Hercules was confused, was this so long ago? Before the Age of Heroes?

"Extra strong and brave mortals and demi-gods. People who fight for those weaker than themselves, or who have no one else who would speak up for them. You never heard of Heroes?" Hercules gave an embarrassed laugh. "Never come across others like me?"

Ares peered at his rescuer, closely. "You're not a normal mortal, but you're not a God either, something in-between. Are you a Hero?"

"Some say that. My mother was a mortal woman, my father a God." Hercules wanted to go no further in this conversation, he was already feeling embarrassed enough with out getting into the breeding habits of Gods and mortals.

"Oh, that explains it then." Even though Hercules could see that Ares was still confused he could see too the same compulsion his brother had as an adult to never admit he didn't know something. "So how did you get here?"

"My brother threw me here, getting me away from, would you believe, Hades. My brother saved my life, at the risk of his own injury." He looked at the child-god and saw a distant look in his face. "What is it Ares, you're thinking something, planning something?"

"How did you know?" The dark haired imp beside him, titled his head to one side and pouted. So like the adult God that Hercules couldn't help smiling.

"Us Heroes know everything.." He kept his face straight with difficulty, but more or less managed it. Ares might be more 'adult' than a mortal five year old but he was still a child and saw the world as a child would. Until proven otherwise he'd believe what he was told by an adult.

"Oh, must be handy then." Ares lost interest in the conversation and struggled on, carrying his sword.

"Would you let me carry your sword for you?" Hercules couldn't remember having ever seen his brother without a sword with him, ever.

"I can't." It was that simple, Ares wouldn't even think about it.

"Why?"

"I'm gonna be the God of War. I gotta carry my sword, it's what I am. Daddy said so." The child had no choice. Even though the sword was a massive burden to him, and kept tripping him up, hurting him he soldiered on.

"You hungry?" It had been almost an hour since they had started walking, almost as long since they had fallen into a comfortable silence. Hercules was amazed any child could keep that quiet that long. "I've never met a boy that could stay as quiet as you, for this long, you okay?"

"Daddy says quiet is best when judging someone. You get to know a man by what he doesn't say as much as what he does say. My dad knows everything!" The trust was absolute between father and son, that much could clearly be seen.

"He should know everything. He's omniscient after all!" The way he said it had his brother giggling, a high pitched sound he knew wouldn't change all that much in all his life, right up until he knew him as an adult.

"At least that's what he tells us!" Ares was still giggling, the hero joined his brother's laughter.

"The question remains. You hungry?"

"Yeah. Could eat a dragon!" Ares looked around him, peering through the trees. "Don't suppose there would be a dragon around here?"

"Dragons are kinda big, how'd you cook it?" He remembered tales of dragons and how his brother kept a few as special guard creatures for certain areas he held as extra special.

"Silly, you don't cook dragons. You hit them right and they cook themselves as they blow up!" Ares supplied a dramatic sound effect for en exploding, self-cooking dragon. Hercules couldn't help but laugh. He liked this Ares.

"Let's see what we can find." He began to look around them. "I suppose you still can't contact your father?"

"Uh Uh, keep trying, keep failing." Ares' shoulders slumped.

"No, you don't fail! You just can't succeed just yet. You will, we will get out of here. Trust me I know."

"You think!" The cynical child corrected him.

"Wrong, you are so wrong Ares. I know so!" Hercules wanted to impart some of his belief in their survival into his brother, but couldn't just say what he was, when he was from or any such thing.

"Okay, you know. Sheesh, seems everybody's omniscient around here, but me!" The young God was rather cross that all his tirade got him was an hysterical half mortal.

They hunted, found shelter, lit a fire and huddled together for warmth.

"Can't you make us some blankets?" Hercules tried to be teasing, he didn't want his brother to think he was criticising his abilities.

"No, sorry, they're made things and I can't do made things yet. I can do natural things, and unreal things but not made things yet. I'll be getting those lessons after my next birthday. That's when I'll have to do my duties for the first time too. I suppose Hades is running out of time to get away with killing me." The matter of fact way he said it shocked Hercules. Why should his brother be so accustomed to his uncle wanting to kill him. Where was his protection?

"Why, why can he kill you now and not after your birthday?" He pulled his brother closer as he felt the slender shoulder shudder, either from fear or the cold. He couldn't tell which.

"Because I'll be six next birthday and will be given the rest of my powers, I'll be the God of War for real and Hades can't kill a God, it's against the rules."

"You're a God now, surely." Still holding on, feeling those shudders lessen, Hercules worried about his brother.

"No, not really, not till my next birthday. In three days time I'll be a full God, until then, I'm fair game!"

"How can you be so calm about your family wanting to kill you?"

"They don't. Just Uncle Hades and Uncle Poseidon. If I can avoid them till then I got it made!" This child-god was so much like the adult version that Hercules winced, luckily Ares never noticed.

"What does your daddy say about all this?"

"They're his rules. We gotta have rules, keeps things straight. Gotta have rulezzz..." Ares fell asleep. When all was said and done about what or who he was right then, he was still a five year old child with limits to his stamina. And they had found his.

Hercules knew Ares couldn't reach his father but what about him. He wasn't a God, he didn't have the Gods ways of communicating, did the same thing apply to mortal prayers? He'd have to concentrate to reach just Zeus, or heaven help him, Hera.

"Zeus, eternal father, aid your child this night." He pictured his father as he knew him. Even attached the word father to that image. "Come grant me your aid as I strive to protect my brother, Ares, from those that would harm him. Grant him a safe and peaceful slumber." And he took one more risk. "Father, I need your help, please!" And did put his whole heart in it, all his feelings towards his father.

And then he waited.

He was almost asleep when a bright light brought him awake and alert again. It also woke Ares who saw who was there and squealed in delight.

"Daddy!" Ares launched himself into his fathers arms and was crushed to his fathers chest.

"Oh son, I was so worried. Why didn't you send for me? Why didn't you come home?" He cried with joy, his favourite son was alive.

"Can't, is a dead area. How did you find me? You really do know everything!" The awe in that childish voice for his father almost brought Hercules to tears.

"I heard a prayer. From my son. I thought it was you. Maybe it was about you! It was vague and distant. If this is a null area, then that would account for it. What happened to you?"

"Cerberus happened. Hades let slip his dog to kill Ares!" Hercules spoke up for the first time since his father had arrived. Zeus looked at this strange not quite a mortal before him.

"Who are you? What are you?" He put his son down and slightly behind him, the better to protect him from this stranger. He was amazed when the stranger smiled broadly at his action.

"Ares, could you be a good boy and get some more of those fruits we had earlier for your daddy?" Hercules looked at his brother and smiled. Ares gifted him with such a warm smile he felt his heart almost break at the pleasure it gave him.

"Sure, for daddy!" And so saying the child-god skipped away into the gloom of evening.

"Not too far!" Hercules called out and waited till he heard an answering okay from his rapidly vanishing brother.

"My name is Hercules. My mother will be Alcemene, my father will be yourself. Earlier today? Future tomorrow? I don't know, let's say today anyway. So earlier today, I was in a fight helping some villagers and I was mortally wounded. One of my friends called on Ares to assist me. And when Ares came and saved my life, Hades came and tried to kill me. Ares kissed me and said, 'see you on the other side.' And when I woke up I was here and now and just in time to save Ares from Cerberus. And he's been with me ever since." He didn't know if his father believed him or not, it was hard to tell through that shuttered expression.

"Who called on Ares to assist a dying man? He IS the God of War isn't he? Not swapped roles with Apollo or somebody like that?" Zeus was indeed confused.

"No, he's God of War. Hades and he were taking about avowed believers but I was kinda out of it at that point. My friend prayed to Ares and he turned up. I'm just glad that he did, granted a bit of explanation would have helped; but he's Ares. He's never easy to figure out."

"Your friend is Ares' avowed believer. A great Warlord is he?" Zeus was calming down, he could feel the absolute truth flow off his future half-god child. A handsome man he had to admit to himself. Rather like Ares in a way.

"On the contrary. Joxer is a really bad fighter. Tries to be a noble warrior, his hearts in the right place but that's about it!" Hercules laughed. That was the second time today someone had asked if Joxer was a Warlord.... "Why do you think he should be a great Warlord? Hades asked much the same question."

"An avowed believer is usually a lover. It's kinda an obvious assumption that War's avowed believer would be a Warlord not a whatever he is!" Zeus cocked his head to one side and listened. "He's safe enough, climbing trees. That boy would live in a tree if I let him!"

"You love him, don't you?"

"What kind of fool question is that?" Zeus was actually cross with his son's rescuer. Hercules realised there was no doubt in Zeus' heart that he loved his son. But what had happened by the time he was born?

"Just that you don't seem to even like Ares by my time. He's War and you've made sure everyone knows he's fair game for any kind of treatment. You let him down somehow, father, and it was in a big way!" Hercules didn't wait for an answer, he cupped his hands about is mouth and called out. "Ares!" He strained to hear his brother scrabbling down a tree and running towards them.

"Daddy! Look! Fruit for you!" Ares gave his beloved father his prizes and sat huddled at his feet as Zeus ate his son's gifts of fruit.

"Ares, my love, thank you!" Zeus stroked his beloved boys hair, wondering for himself how he could ever let his son down. Looking up to his future son's face he asked. "You sure?" Certain that Hercules would understand his meaning.

"Positive, the jealousy he has for me is unbelievable. I've spent a lifetime fighting against him. And he ...." Hercules stopped talking and looked at his father, who was sitting there, petting his little boy, still smoothing that unruly hair Hercules recognised as just as bad in the future.

"Or was he keeping you at a distance till your memories caught up?" Zeus saw Hercules flinch at that accusation - question.

"Or even keeping me away from Hades? What would happen if Hades gets to know I killed Cerberus today?"

"Quite, quite." Zeus fell silent. "Come my lamb, time we were getting you home, your mamma is frantic with worry." He let his son climb onto his knee and lifted him as he stood.

"Love you daddy." A sleepy childish voice announced to the world.

"Love you too sweetheart. Forever and always love you too." He looked at his future son, "You'd better come too, Hercules, we've got to get you home."

"I thought this place was a null place."

"Oh, it is, for the children, but adult Gods can work here, just takes a lot more effort." And as he spoke he distorted the space around them so they finally stood on Olympus. In the great hall where Hera was waiting.

"Ares!" She screamed and woke her son, snatching him from her husbands arms. "Are you safe my little one?" She checked him over, thoroughly. It pleased Hercules that his brother was so obviously loved by his, their father and that he was as equally loved by his mother. Hera dashed him from the room, carrying him in her arms as if she would never let him go again.

"Don't worry, he'll be well guarded for the next three days." Zeus broke into Hercules' reverie.

"And then? Six is way to young to handle being God of War!" He snapped back at his father.

"You think so?"

"I know so. Ares was-is-will be whichever, a cold hearted ... well bastard is the only word I can describe him with." Hercules shrugged, embarrassed.

Zeus stood there before his future son and played out two images before his eyes. Ares takes his powers at six as was destined. And Ares takes his powers later, as was Hercules' request. Ares was safe versus Ares was a continued target for his Uncles desires for greater power. His beautiful son was safe or in danger. What would any father do?

"If he doesn't take his powers in three days time, he will continue to be a target for Hades and Poseidon. And you can not stay here to look after him, you are out of time and out of place here. What would you do if he were your son, your son whom you loved beyond life itself?"

Hercules looked at his father and knew that in three days time Ares would be given his full powers.

"The same I guess." And it was the truth.

"I'll make sure he knows I love him. Now make ready to go home, son, and thank you for Ares' life." As he raised his arms Hercules had a sudden sharp and truly clear thought.

"Wait, don't over love him. Because he will be so jealous when your other demi-god children are born, me included. Just be there for him, until his avowed believer gets here. Joxer, his avowed believer. I just can't imagine it!" Hercules smiled at the thought and saw his father nod his agreement as the world misted over and cleared again.

Once more Hercules was lying on the ground, in the wood he had been in earlier and Iolaus, Joxer and Ares were still there. All looking at him. Hades was nowhere to be seen.

"Welcome back, little brother." Ares grinned at him, smirked might have been closer.

"What happened?"

Ares raised a sardonic eyebrow at that particular question. "Then or now or both?"

"Both!" The great hero struggled to sit up, Ares helped him into a more comfortable position.

"Then? Hades was punished for trying to kill me. Not by dad, no, much worse, he let mamma do it!" Ares giggled that high pitched sound Hercules remembered from so very long ago. "Now? Hades was punished, not by dad this time either, but by mamma. If you had died, I would have died. And she never knew that until today, boy is she pissed. You'd better keep your head down for a while, then she'll calm down and will claim she never tried to hurt you ever! Mamma's like that. And three days later I got my full powers, not that they did me that much good. I had to live at home for centuries."

Ares grinned at his little brother, a warm grin. He looked up at Joxer and shrugged in the direction of the thickest part of the wood. For his part Joxer, Ares' avowed believer patted his God's shoulder and smiled. For the first time Hercules noticed that Joxer wasn't wearing his hodge podge armour. That Iolaus wasn't wearing his pendant, and that he himself bore a ring on his right hand. A ring that avowed him as protected by Ares, God of War.

"Where am I?" He couldn't help but ask.

"On the other side, of course!" Ares, kissed his check and bid him farewell. "You be more careful in future. And for my sake, when Iolaus says duck, damn well DUCK! Okay!?" It was all Hercules could do to nod. "See you Iolaus!"

"See you Ares, Joxer take care." And as his friend waved to his brother and Joxer Hercules looked around him at the changes the world had known. Wondering what else was different.

"Wonder what Xena's doing!" He casually observed.

"Who?" Iolaus asked.

"Xena: Warrior Princess?" Hercules prompted.

"Xena was never a warrior. Well the only one I know is Ares' priestess, dark hair, light eyes, terrific right hook!" Iolaus helped his companion up. "You okay, really?"

"Fine, just knocked around a bit, that's all. What about Gabrielle?"

"Who would she be? A Warrior Queen?"

"No, Xena's, well .. companion, paramour, friend, whatever."

"Never heard of her." Iolaus gave his best friend a real close look. "Maybe I should call Ares back and have him look at you some more? Or we could go home and I could just love you some more?" The look he shot the hero raised the ambient temperature by several degrees. It looked, to Hercules, that in this version of now, he had gotten his greatest wish. One denied him before.

Thinking of things to come Hercules watched Iolaus swinging his hips as he walked away from him, in the direction of home. And not for the last time would someone in these circumstances mumble to themselves, the only appropriate response.

"Oh, boy!"


END


Okay so it was kind influenced by Quantum Leap,