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“Dude, take some Dayquil.”
“Huh?” Sam looked up from the laptop to see Dean stuffing clothes into a duffle bag.
“You’re sniffing again. Which means you’ll be sneezing again soon. Do you think I wanna catch your cold? Take some Dayquil or, better yet, take some Nyquil and sleep in the car and maybe you can shake that bug before it gets worse.” He slung his bag over his shoulder. “You ready to go?”
Sam downed the rest of his coffee and smothered a yawn into his shoulder. The exactly seventy-eight minutes of sleep he’d had the night before was taking its toll. His eyes felt like they were on fire and trying to squint at the laptop screen wasn’t helping. “Yeah. Sniff! Ready.”
Dean eyed him, reached into his bag, and tossed Sam the Nyquil. “Two gulps and you’ll sleep like a baby, Sammy.”
*
Sam slid the key card into the motel room door and managed to gather up all the grocery bags and turn the knob before the little green light turned orange and locked him back out. He walked in the room, sniffling as the warmth of the room hit his cold nose. He coughed, cleared his throat. He wasn’t in the room three seconds before he sneezed. “hahh-Hahshoo!”
“Hope you bought a lot of Kleenex.”
“Sniff! ‘Scuse me. Sniff, sniff!” Sam had, in fact, bought a box. But he’d also bought a six-pack for Dean, who was just as happy to see that as Sam’s Kleenex box. There were cans of soup and bandages and all manner of supplies; you could never own too many lighters in this line of work. Sam put down all the bags and settled on his bed to blow his nose.
“Long lines at the grocery store?”
“What’s that?”
“You’ve been gone an hour and a half, Sammy.”
Sam checked his watch, surprised. “Yeah, I guess so. Long… loh…”
“Oh great. Another sneeze.”
“Jer… hah-hah-Chuhhhh! Sniff! Jerk.”
*
“Ehh-Choo!”
“You still got that cold?”
Sam had tried his best not to sneeze that particular sneeze. He’d scrubbed his finger at his nose repeatedly. He’d pinched his nostrils. He’d held his breath. Nothing had helped. Dean had heard. And it was stupid, really, because after a spectacular sneezing fit, he’d managed to go almost twenty minutes without sneezing. Sure, his nose was still kind of tickley and his eyes didn’t feel quite right. But he’d thought maybe the worst was over for now.
“Dude, it’s been weeks. If you keep this up, I’m going to drag your ass to some free clinic and let them poke you.”
“I’ll be fine, Dean. Sniff!”
“You’ll be annoying.”
Sam blew his nose and tried not to sneeze again.
*
“heh… heh-Shoo!”
“God bless you.”
“Th-thanks, Cas.” Sam blew his nose and tossed the tissue away. It didn’t go very far because his arms, along with the rest of his body, were tucked beneath Castiel’s arms as the angel embraced him from behind. He felt warm, protected, cared for. Just as importantly, he felt sated and relaxed. “Dean’s gonna figure this out pretty soon.”
“He has not yet.”
“I know. So far I’ve managed to hold back my sneezes a little and he thinks I have a cold. But he’s not stupid. Sniff! He’s going to notice that I sneeze whenever you’re around.”
“If I could clip the feathers from my wings for you, I would do so.”
“I knuh-know. hehh-EHShooo!” He blew his nose again, tossed the tissues again. “I wish they dih-didn’t make me sneeze so much. I can’t even see your wings, but they still tickle… me… heh-IHSchhhh!” Though unable to perceive them visually, he could feel the wings wrap around his naked body from behind, cuddle him close. Wings like satin, soft against his cheek. Wings so big they covered his body like a heavy blanket. Even with the sneezing, he’d never felt so good.
“Why would your sneezing indicate to Dean that you and I engage in sexual relations quite regularly?”
Sam smiled. “It’s Dean we’re talking about here. He’ll notice you make me sneeze sniff! Sniff! He’ll figure out I’m sneezing because I’ve been secretly meeting you. And he’ll put two and two together because the only things he ever thinks about are hunting, food, and sex.”
“Hmm.” Cas made a sound of understanding and agreement. “You’re right.” He hugged tighter then kissed the back of one of Sam’s ears. “We’d better find you someone to catch a cold from so you’ll start sneezing from that instead.”
Sam’s eyes widened. “Um, Cas. I don’t think that’s a very g—”
But the angel vanished, leaving Sam alone in bed and sure this new plan was an even worse one than trying to hold back his sneezes.