Work Text:
You're telling Nina!
Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS; it is the property of its respective creators.
In a bar near Ohio State...
"Hey, Tony!"
Conner Lance called to his fraternity brother, Tony DiNozzo. Tony looked up at him and grinned. When Conner reached him, he stood up and clapped him on the back, followed by a high five.
"Nice of you to join me," he ribbed. "I was starting to think Nina had locked you in the bedroom again." Tony stared at him, a leer on his face.
Connor shook his head. He had made the mistake, two years ago, while drunk, of telling him just what Nina locked in him there for, and he still hadn't shut up about it!
"Are you jealous?" Was all he said instead. It wasn't a secret that Tony thought Nina was hot. Not to mention since Shelia had dumped him he had been a bit …how had Nina put it?
"He's acting hornier than a tomcat in heat!"
That sounded about right. Tony made at face at him.
"Me? Jealous because you have the divine Miss Nina Phillips all to yourself?"
He shot him a look.
"Are you smoking something? Of course I am!"
Connor laughed. As Bob the bartender served Connor his regular shot of Jack Daniel's and a beer chaser, a beautiful sight caught his eye. There in all her cheerleading outfit glory was Lila Simmons. A smirk spread across Connor's face.
Looking back at Tony, his smirk grew wider. His friend's eyes' were glued to the sandy-haired cheerleader. Motioning to Bob for a shot of Johnny Walker Red, Connor pushed it in front of Tony. He leaned in close to him to whisper.
"You should ask her out."
Connor almost got his face in a collision with Tony's for that remark. Large hazel eyes stared at him, incredulous.
"Are you positive you didn't smoke something? There is no way in hell I'm asking Lila out now. It will set the plan back months!"
Tony's voice had a panicked edge to it, and he grabbed his shot of Johnny Walker Red and gulped it down, slamming the shot glass onto the bar.
Connor rolled his eyes. He quickly signaled to Bob for another shot for Tony. He put that in the place of the first one.
Tony's "plan" usually consisted of "accidentally" running into the object of his affections and lust of the moment enough times that she would give up ignoring, avoiding, or playing hard to get and just go out with him. The "plan" took time though, and Connor didn't have much of it.
"Tony, man, I think your plan went down the drain when you almost missed the ball in the last game of the season because Lila wasn't wearing a bra!" Connor sighed.
Tony avoided his eyes.
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
Eager not to have to look at his friend, he grabbed Conner's Jack Daniel's and gulped it down. Conner looked at him outraged. Oh, if he didn't need tonight free…
Now slightly irritable, and drink less, he tried a different approach.
"So, Lila's not pretty enough anymore? Am I going to have to tell Nina you're been holding out on us?"
As he said it, Conner could sympathize with Tony's now ashen white face. Nina was hell to deal with if you kept information from her. Tony had been at the end of that before. So had he, and he had no desire to be locked out of the bedroom tonight.
"So, is Tom McClay right in what he said to me? Are you losing your touch?"
He let that and the threat of an overprotective, annoyed Nina hang it the air for a minute. Tony's white face grew red, and his eyes flashed. He stood up, grabbed his last shot, and gulped it down. He looked at Conner.
"I haven't lost anything. I'll show you. And don't tell Nina anything. There's nothing to tell!"
Conner watched as Tony marched over and mingled with Lila. He had on his best smile, the one that could blind you easily. She was blushing at whatever he said to her.
Conner looked at his watch. When he looked up, Tony was helping Lila with her jacket. He grinned at Conner as they walked out the door. Conner watched and when the door shut behind them, laughed. He stood up, paid Bob, and walked out.
He looked up at the barely visible stars and grinned.
"Ten minutes to spare, nice."
Tony would be busy for awhile, and he'd have Nina all to himself. Just the way he liked it. He was almost to his car when he heard a voice behind him.
"Conner! Conner! Conner Lance!"
He turned around and was met with a sorry sight. Tony stood before him; his hair messed up, lipstick on his nose and cheek, and a hand print on the other. Conner stared at him.
"Dare I ask what happened?" He wondered.
"Lila forgot to mention her boyfriend was in town. Slapped me when he showed up with roses." Tony looked very unhappy. Conner looked him over, looked at his watch, and back at Tony.
"Get in the car."
Tony didn't need to be told twice. He all but ran to Conner's car.
"Oh, and Tony?"
"Yeah?"
"You get to tell Nina why you look like you were in the middle of a cat fight."
Tony looked at him, and started to bang his head against the car he just reached. Conner sighed. So much for some bedroom fun with Nina.
Valerie Portolano