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Neighbor's Viewpoint: "Interview with a Pirate"
by Pirate Turner
Reporter Trish Tilby ducked as a body sailed over her head and the ship's railing and splashed into the water beyond. She hurriedly straightened and shoved the microphone back into her interviewee's face. "You've helmed the British superhero team Excalibur, been a member of the X-Men for years, and saved the world countless times. I'm sure the question on all our viewers' minds is: With all the exciting new avenues open to you, Nightcrawler, what are you going to do next?"
Nightcrawler stood before Trish with his arms out to either side, each blue hand wielding a sharp sword. His tail jerked wildly behind him as he swept through one on-coming opponent after another with the sword it held while never even so much as bothering to look over his shoulder. Mischief gleamed in his yellow eyes and seemed even to spark from the shining points of his glistening fangs.
"I vill never abandon Professor X's dream. His is a dream of peaceful coexistence for all races. It is one I have always believed in and have dedicated mein life to. Zat vill never change. However, I find another dream opened to me now, and it is one I feel I must venture after."
Somewhere out on the deck, a cry sounded. Nightcrawler whipped toward it, all three swords held high and at the ready. He saw one of his new friends going down and heard Barbossa's laughter. He reached out for a robe, grabbed it a split second before a tanned hand could close around it, and swung away.
Trish grabbed the opportunity to move on to the ship's Captain. "Captain Sparrow," she asked, "is it true that Nightcrawler has signed on to be a member of your crew?"
Jack paused and glowered at the reporter and her camera. "Now's not really the time to be askin' questions, luv. Don't you see me ship's under attack?"
"It's just another attack by Barbossa."
"Every attack," Jack countered, waving a solitary finger through the open air, "must be taken seriously."
"Isn't it true that he attacks you every day?"
"Aye, an' we defeat him every day!" Fury blazed from Jack's eyes, but Trish stood strong before him while hoping that the camera was catching every exciting inch of his body. "An' somehow the bloody bastard keeps comin' back! Now be off wit' ye! We've a fight to win!"
"But what of Nightcrawler?"
"What o' him?"
"Is he or is he not a member of your crew?"
"Maybe he is," Jack hiccupped for emphasis, "maybe he isn't."
"What do you think of him?"
"What do I think?" Jack repeated, swaggering back and forth while never taking an actual step. "I think . . . ," he gestured with his head to where Nightcrawler was busily fighting five men at once. He bamfed several times amongst the scurvy lot, matching swords swiftly, easily relieving them of their weapons, and ultimately knocking them overboard. "I think he's a mighty fine asset to the crew, one heckuva good chap, and bloody hard to keep up with, and," he continued, swinging his head back to glower once more at Trish and her crew, "I think it's far pass time ye got off o' me ship!"
"Captain, surely . . . "
Trish was left with her mouth hanging open, facing the wall of the cabin, as Jack swung off into the battle. He landed beside Will, and the camera turned to where they fought with their backs to each other. They moved with perfect synchronicity, defeating every opponent that came their way. {Now there's a story I'd love to set to bed!} Trish thought.
"Ya heard the Capt'n, girly. Now are ye movin' or di ye have tae be moved?"
Trish whirled in the direction of the voice to find a short, bald man draped across the end of a cannon. She gulped, her color draining, when she realized that the cannon was pointed directly at her. "Su-Surely you wou-would-wouldn't?" she stuttered out.
Danger flickered in the little man's eyes as he reached out and struck the cord, setting it to flame. Trish's eyes nearly popped out of her head. "We're leaving! We're leaving! We're leaving!" she screeched and out ran her camera crew as she left the Pearl.
The End