Work Text:
Neighbor's Viewpoint: "Live with Gaston"
by Pirate Turner
"So, what do you think of your new neighbors, Mister Gaston, and the merger between the Marvel and Disney worlds?"
Gaston jumped back instinctively as the strange thing the woman before him called a microphone was thrust into his face. He patted his hair down once more as his sidekick hurriedly straightened his clothes, then smoothly booted LeFou out of the picture. He flashed the thing she called a camera his most charming, tooth-filled grin and heaved his chest up to it. He gave an extra mighty heave, and a couple of buttons popped off to reveal the first of his chest's manly hairs.
"I think," he spoke with a deep voice, waggling his eyebrows suggestively at the camera and reporter alike, "that whatever brings new women to our realm is a good thing, and I'm sure that you ladies out there can agree that any time you get a shot at a man like me is your lucky day." He held his arms up and bunched his muscles together, showing off. "I know you're already lining up to meet me," he continued, looking into the camera, "but don't fret. There's plenty of Gaston to go around."
"G-A-S-T-O-I-- uh . . . Gaston!" sang his sidekick as he tottered back into view. Gaston once more kicked LeFou off screen, then shot another huge smile at the camera and resumed flexing.
Trish Tilby faced her cameraman and rolled her eyes. "That's Trish Tilby reporting for ABC News with another Neighbor's Viewpoint." She waited until the red light went out, then whisked her hand away from Gaston, who had grabbed it and started kissing it. She made a face at the slimy marks left on her hand, wiped it off on her slacks, and called, "Let's roll! We've got a hundred more to do!"
The End