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Pussycat, pussycat
by Lilithangel
“I was not a tortoiseshell,” Owen said through gritted teeth.
“What’s wrong?” Gwen said as she joined them.
“I was probably a tabby with red markings,” Owen went on. He was pacing and his hair was in disarray. “A tiger or a moggy.”
“Owen’s just found out that tortoiseshell cats are normally female,” Tosh said.
“Or on rare occasions sterile males,” Ianto added with a smirk, “which he should be glad of considering the number of female cats in my neighbourhood and how pleased with himself Owen looked when he came in from outside.”
“I didn’t,” Owen protested, “oh god.” One last tug of his hair and it was totally standing on end.
“Should we be doing paternity tests?” Jack said. “If you weren’t a tortoiseshell that is.”
“Trust you to tomcat around Owen,” Gwen said with a roll of her eyes.
“No, no, no,” Owen said, “a thousand times no.”
“That’s actually a bit disturbing,” Tosh said.
“Having the taste of mouse in your mouth is disturbing,” Owen said, “waking up naked in Ianto’s bed is disturbing. That is bloody insane is what it is and it did not happen.”
“You were naked in Ianto’s bed,” Jack said with interest, “where was I?”
“So you were a tortoiseshell then?” Ianto said innocently, although it was ruined by the gleam in his eye.
“We will never speak of this again,” Owen said through gritted teeth and he stormed off.
“Next week I’ll tell him Isis the Burmese from down the road is pregnant,” Ianto said.
“Sweepstake for how he reacts?” Gwen suggested and money was put down.
Jack won, he always did.
END