Work Text:
He knew the rumors had gone around, both about what had happened in interrogation and on the bus. He was on administrative leave for a few days, had been physically kicked out of the office by Vance and SecNav. He guessed he’d pushed his luck with Domino and there was that whole getting shot thing, despite the fact that it was a minor flesh wound and a badly broken finger.
He sighed as he heard his front door open and close. “Leave it on the table. If it needs to be cold, find room!” They’d been coming by all day, first Ziva, bringing donuts and double-strength coffee for breakfast. Then Ducky, checking on his hand. McGee brought sandwiches and coffee for lunch. Abby’d brought over some gumbo for dinner. So at ten pm, this would be Vance or Tony. He was banking on Tony. Vance was still too pissed.
Tony had been there when Lee had brought up Kelly. And Tony knew him well enough to know just how shaken up he’d been. Tony’d been on a rampage of his own and Gibbs had known his senior agent would need to process everything before coming over.
He lifted his glass of bourbon, toasting himself. “Showtime.”
“No chilling needed, Boss. Brought pizza, beer. You’re not on any pain meds, are you?” Tony’s voice was soft—deceptively so. Gibbs remembered those flashing eyes and the growl in Tony’s voice from earlier all too well though.
“Flesh wound, broken finger, black eye,” Gibbs retorted, rolling his eyes. “I’m fine, DiNozzo.” He wanted to ask if Tony’d calmed down but he didn’t dare. Tony had been volatile lately, both on and off the job
“Yeah I know. Why’d you take the time off? Cause SecNav asked?”
Gibbs smirked. “Tony, SecNav doesn’t ask. He tells. He orders. And I’m not his favorite person right now.” Gibbs had gotten a dressing down from both SecNav and Vance for his “irresponsibility”, but they hadn’t threatened his job, at least. And McGee was safe. Gibbs hadn’t wanted McGee impacted for what was his decision.
“Guess so,” Tony replied, putting a couple of slices of pizza on a plate and cracking the twist top on a beer. Gibbs took the food and drink without complaint and gave Tony a look.
“Ya joining me, DiNozzo? Hate to eat alone and this is your favorite, not mine.”
Tony leaned against the workbench, taking a long drag of beer and Gibbs knew he was working out what to say. After all this time with Tony, he knew the man better than almost anyone else.
“You gonna ask?”
“Ask what?” at least Tony had the good grace to look shocked.
“If I would have gone to the lengths Lee did if I could have saved Kelly. And the answer is yes. You don’t know what losing a child is like until you’ve experienced it.” Gibbs paused, drinking down one gulp of the brew, and met Tony’s eyes again. “You have a kid in danger, you do anything to save ‘em. That includes treason—or murder.”
Giving voice to that loosened something in Gibbs’ chest. On some level, he understood.
“So you don’t fault her for committing treason?” Tony arched a brow.
“I fault her for killing two innocent men,” Gibbs shot back. “According to Vance, I committed treason.” He looked into the corner of the room, shaking his head. “Don’t you start with me, DiNozzo. You can’t understand.” He set his jaw and stared into nothingness, trying to master his emotions.
“Boss?” Tony asked uncertainly. “You okay?” Tony looked very concerned as he reached for Gibbs’ beer and Gibbs shook his head, draining the drink. He supposed word had gotten around that he’d been drinking most of the day.
“Don’t worry about it, Tony. It’s okay. It’s really okay.” It wasn’t right now, but it would be. He’d get through it.
Tony rested a hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently. “Gibbs, think you need me to take you to bed.” Tony blushed at the clear meaning behind the words and Gibbs shook his head.
“I’m okay, DiNozzo. Like it down here.”
“Why? You’re not working on the boat right now.”
Gibbs looked into the corner again where he’d laid out of few things, a favorite sweater, a couple of forgotten little dolls, on the other workbench and this time he saw Tony’s gaze follow. “Just comfortable down here.” His breath caught as Tony drifted across the room, bringing a hand down to almost touch the items before pulling his hand back. When Tony looked up at him, his eyes were very bright.
“Gibbs?”
“Yeah, Tony?”
Tony regarded him, nodding. “You live down here in memories. What’s haunting you? Your mother? Kelly and Shannon? Kate and Lee? Langer? Pacci? Some of your men?”
Gibbs stepped closer, covering Tony’s hand and pressing it lightly against the sweater. “Got a lot to say and it seems like down here they might be able to hear me. Talk about a lot of things, especially you.”
“You talk about me?” Tony asked with a hopeful look.
“Yeah. You, the team. Jackson…” He shrugged. “I think well down here. And I have a lot of thinking to do.”
“Thinking about what, Gibbs?”
Gibbs leaned against Tony, resting his chin on Tony’s shoulder. “You and me.”
Gibbs swallowed hard, having given voice to whatever it was between them. A kiss, a couple of forbidden touches that nearly turned sexual. They’d never acknowledged what was brewing between them, then Jenny had died and everything changed. And he wanted whatever was brewing between him and Tony to come to its natural conclusion.
Turning to Tony, he slipped his uninjured hand into the other man’s. “You said something about taking me to bed...” He hoped that the promise was shining in his eyes. This wasn’t just about comfort; his desire was rising by the second.
“My pleasure,” Tony said quietly. Gibbs let out a slow breath of air as Tony led him upstairs. Down there was Gibbs’ past, but the man he walked hand in hand with was his future. And for the moment, he felt complete.