Work Text:
A Simple Kiss
by Pirate Turner
Blue eyes intently watched the figure standing at the window. Although her forehead pressed against the cold glass, she did not even seem to notice the chill that swept through her body from the touch. Her emerald green eyes gazed out onto the snowy grounds of Xavier's Institute For Higher Learning, but she did not see her friends outside as they enjoyed the gentle snowfall.
Tonight was the anniversary of the first time he had ever kissed her, and it pained her already-broken heart even more to know that she would never again feel his gentle lips. She remembered that night as vividly as if it had been only the night before, and she clung to those memories of their beautiful but tragic love even more desperately than she did the memories of the rest of their times together for that night had been the most perfect night of her life. Much to Gambit's chagrin, Joseph had swept her away from the others to take her on a magical carriage ride through the city.
Looking back at that night together, Rogue realized, not for the first time, that Joseph had always treated her like a lady, a Princess even. Whenever she had needed him and had allowed him to be, he had been right there for her. He had always been incredibly gentle with her, even when he had been angry at Gambit, and had never purposefully treated her with anything other than the upmost respect. Sure, they had had their problems, such as when they had first met and she, having mistaken him for Magneto, had attacked Joseph or the misunderstanding they had had when she had learned that he had been peeking into her window while she had slept, but through her entire, no one had treated her more gently or with more love and respect than Joseph had. Her only regret, when it came to that part of their relationship, was that it had taken his death for her to truly realize how much he meant to her and how incredibly lucky she was to have his love.
As her mind turned back to that Winter night together, she remembered how he had gazed at her in the carriage. Even the memory of his eyes, the bluest eyes she had ever seen, still stole her breath away. She recalled his deep, soft chuckles as they had laughed though over what she could not remember, and her ears ached to hear his warm laughter again.
He had taken her to a private spot where they could be alone, and it had been there, while underneath the beautiful, star-swept sky with only the stars and the brilliant moon to bare witness to their moment, that he had given her the most treasured present she had ever received. He had tried to explain it to her, but when that had failed, he had asked her a question that was both simple and incredibly complex at the same time. He had asked her if she trusted him, and it had only been when she answered him that she had realized just how much she did trust him.
Rogue had led a very hard life, and before that moment, she could have counted the number of people who had never let her down on one finger. That single finger would have represented herself for everybody else she had ever cared about and dared to trust had done something, rather intentionally or unintentionally, at one time or another that had hurt her. She had thought she had learned that she dared not trust any other living soul, but Joseph had healed her broken heart as well as her shattered spirit and faith.
Although his death had pained her, she had eventually came to understand that he had not let her down in even that. The others knew he had died to save the world and its people, but Rogue knew the real reason Joseph had died. After he had died, she had eventually been elected to go through his belongings as she had been the closest to him. When she had found his will, she had also found a letter written to her. Since joining the X-Men, he had known that his death might come at any time and so had written the letter in preparation of such occurring. He had poured his heart and all his love for her into that letter, but while doing so, he had also told her not to be sad if he died for if he was dead, he would have died to have saved her for she was the only thing that truly mattered to him in the world and nothing else could have possibly torn him from her side.
Though she still feared what might happen if he touched her for the thought of losing him, especially through her own fault, terrified him, Rogue had still trusted Joseph. When she had told him that, he had gently held her in the secure safety of his strong arm's tender embrace and had softly pressed his lips to her bare forehead. Her hand rose to touch the exact spot his lips had kissed that night, and she softly breathed his name as the tears began to fall.
She was crying again, and Joseph cursed himself for the thousandth time. He hated for her to be so sad, and he hated himself for making her so heart-stricken and being unable to do anything to reassure her. He loved her more than anything and with a depth beyond anything that he had ever thought himself possible of before meeting her, but for all the immense, endless love he had for her alone, he could do nothing but stand and watch her cry.
Although he no longer knew what day it was, Joseph could feel in his heart that tonight was the anniversary of their first kiss. It was supposed to have been a joyous celebration. He had already been planning exactly how to sweep his beloved Angel off of her feet when he had gone to face his final battle. Not for the first time, he wondered if Rogue hated him now for dying and leaving her. The realization that he had not had any other true choice for anything less would have meant Rogue's doom no longer offered any reassurance.
Although his sacrifice had saved her life, it had also broken her heart. He had seen how greviously LeBeau had harmed his beloved, and he had sworn to never hurt her. Even when he had been frustrated with her for being unable to turn a blind eye to Gambit even after all the pain and heartache the accursed Cajun had put her through, Joseph had still been gentle with Rogue. He had built his entire life around her and had dedicated himself -- heart, body, mind, soul, his very existence -- to her and to giving her the happiness that she had always deserved but had had to go without for so long before they had united.
He would have gladly done anything to make her happy and would have gone to the very bottom pits of Hell itself to keep from harming her and to assure her safety. Although he had long ago realized that he might be killed and had taken the appropriate preparation measures for his own death, Joseph had never once stopped to think that it might one day come to where he would have a choice between breaking her heart and letting her die. He wondered for a second if he could give up his life, breaking her heart in so doing, in order to keep her alive if he was given a chance to go back to that time again, and Joseph realized that he would. Even though her heart was broken, at least she lived, and as long as she lived, there was a chance, no matter how slim, that she might one day be happy again . . . even if it was not with him.
"God, Ah miss you, Joseph . . . " The sound of her beautiful voice, though ridden with heartbreaking pain, returned Joseph's mind to the present. "Ah love you," she spoke again as he watched her crying at the windowsill, "an' Ah'd do anythin' ta be wit' ya."
"Oh, Rogue," he whispered, his own heart breaking in sympathy for his soul mate. Although he knew she could not hear him, he spoke again, "I love you too."
As she turned from the window and he saw the grief and misery clouding her beautiful face, he wished desperately that there was some way he could make her know that he was with her. As she stepped closer to where he hovered, unseen by all human eyes, Joseph fluttered closer to Rogue and reached out for her only to have his hands pass right through her body. Joseph's head lowered, and he tried desperately to press a gentle kiss to Rogue's forehead. Even as the clock struck the exact minute that they had once shared their first kiss in, Joseph's hovered against Rogue's forehead. In that minute and with every inch of his being, Joseph willed Rogue to feel him and to know how much he still loved her. Closing his eyes, he tried frantically to send her his love.
Something invisible brushed against Rogue's forehead in the exact spot Joseph's lips had once touched, and in the next second, a feeling of warmth cascaded through her body. "Joseph?" she whispered, her voice hushed. Her green eyes darted desperately around the room but saw no sign of him though she felt his presence as strongly as if he was standing right before her. She closed her eyes, letting his love flood her soul, as she whispered quietly, "Ah love you too."
The End