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Peja's Wonderful World of Makebelieve Import
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Published:
2020-11-05
Words:
447
Chapters:
1/1
Kudos:
4
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1,625

A Yogi's Delusions cause Confusion

Summary:

Summary: Tony vs. Yoga

Warnings/AN’s: A funny oneshot based on my real life Yoga teacher although the psychic farts are all mine.

Work Text:

Tony shakes his head to clear away the sweaty haze he’s surrounded by. Maybe it had been one of those weeks and he was hearing things, it certainly wouldn’t surprise him after being around these yoga crazies. Stretching his neck about he looks around to see if anyone else was fazed. It was hard to do while in the downward dog but he had to be certain the teacher had actually spoken. He was about to lose his balance, he was holding in his laughter or trying to at least.

 

Ever since he had been injured again and the doctors had caused Abby to have a freak-out when they mentioned his too speedy heartbeat she had been dragging him to these classes. With the full support of Gibbs and Ducky, of course neither of those two men would be caught dead here. At least he wasn’t in a pink or purple leotard again, those years in ballet while good for his figure had been tough on his psyche.

 

But man what a nut Tony thinks to himself. He has never shared those thoughts with Abbs though because the two women are pretty tight. But god when he had to sit through hours of listening to hear go on and on about pelvic bowl and chakra energies he wanted to stab himself deaf. But that had been normal from the get go but tonight’s spiel on how stinky farting was not appropriate in class about had him rolling out his relaxed and waiting dog pose and onto the floor. And after hearing her say once more to the young man who had been behind the so called stinky farts that only psychic farts were allowed in her yoga class he was about to die. He couldn’t wait to try that one on McGeek at the office and Jethro in bed one night. We’ll see what Gibbs thinks about this Quack’s class after that.

 

Shandi as the yogi wannabe was called really had some crazy ideas. Hopefully Abby wasn’t too fond of them otherwise, he’d hear about his sneaky stink attacks in her lab tomorrow. But what was he to do, really, he couldn’t just keep coming to this class and listen to her delusions of yogi grandeur he would rather wear a tiara and dance to the nutcracker in a pink tutu then listen to her crazy psychic talk.

 

“Shit,” Tony yelps as he looks up and sees the yogi herself staring at him. He blinks though as she pats him on the butt and smiles. Damn Abby and her psychic girlfriend anyway, he’d rather bear the wrath of Gibbs than this any day.