Work Text:
End of Denial
by BJ2
vze2ndvx@yahoo.com
"Didn't your mother ever tell you-" The rest of the comment was lost as Ro gasped loudly. I whip my head to the side to look at her and the pain I see mirrors my own.
Those words were meant to wound savagely and from the silence that follows I know that they've done the job. The girl knows his past, she knows his mother abandoned him to a life of slavery and worse! She knows it's the best way to hurt him and she uses it without thinking twice.
I start to move forward to intervene but I'm stopped by a cool hand on my arm, "Let them go. This has to happen for him to finally see the truth." Ro's words are frosty as she glares at the closed door of the Den. I can see that it's taking every ounce of control she possesses to keep from moving herself. The temperature in the room drops noticeably as she tries to regain her composure. She loves Remy too, and hearing those hurtful words made her heart ache for her adopted brother.
"But Ro-"
"No, Logan," she says, "I have been a witness to too many of their fights. Now is not the time to step in, when it is over, that is when you need to go to him." She looks me in the eyes and raises a hand to caress my face, "You will be there for him this time, won't you? You will see to it that the abuse ends?" Ro knew before I did that I love the boy, it was she who made me face the truth. Now she's counting on me to stop the endless cycle of break ups and make ups, she's entrusting her dearest friend to me.
Her hand falls to her side as we hear muttered words and the door across the hall opens as Rogue comes storming out. We wait a few minutes before Ro gives me a gentle push, "I'm getting worried, he should have come out by now. Please Logan, help my brother see what love truly is?"
I look into her eyes and nod, I'm tired of watching from afar as the boy I've fallen in love with gets pushed around again and again. I won't stay quiet any longer as his heart is used as a punching bag in whatever sick game the girl's playing. I step silently across the hall and peer into the dark room. It takes a moment for my eyes to adjust enough to see him sitting on the floor in the corner of the room. It doesn't take a genius to know that's where he was standing when she hit him with the killing blow in this particular fight, "Rem?"
His hand quickly moves to wipe the evidence of his broken heart from his face as he stands up and turns away from me to face the fireplace, "Didn' hear y' come in, Logan. Y been standin' there long?" The kid and I have been friends for years, he's usually comfortable in my presence but there's a stiffness about him now that makes me cringe.
It break my heart to know that he intends to carry this pain alone believing there's no one else he can turn to. He loves Ro more than anyone else in the house but even she would never know if she and I hadn't happened across this latest fight. "He tries to protect me from all the ugliness," she told me tearfully on the day I finally confessed to her that I love the boy, "He doesn't want to pollute our friendship with his mistakes," she said in a shaking voice.
I take a step closer and close the door, his sadness is driving the beast inside of me mad. **Remy should never hurt like this!** It screams **Make the pain stop!** It cries out desperately.
I learned long ago to listen to that voice so instead of speaking I stride forward and pull my secret love close. He stiffens in my arms, probably expecting more of the pain his girlfriend seems only too happy to supply, but I just hold on to him tighter. As I'm finally getting my mind wrapped around the inconceivable idea that he's *in* my arms, and that I'm actually *holding* him, I hear him take a ragged breath and then he's holding onto me as if I'm the only solid thing left in the world. I close my eyes, torn between feeling ecstatic because holding him feels so incredibly *right* and devastated by the weight of his hopelessness as it washes over me in waves.
My hands move unconsciously up and down his back as I make soft soothing sounds I had no idea I was capable of making. All I know in this moment is that I have to make this *better* I have to make it *right* again. I turn my face and reverently kiss his temple reveling in the fact that I can as we sink to the floor, all strength gone again from his legs. "I'm here, darlin', I'm here now and I'm gonna make it alright, you'll see." I don't know where the words are coming from, or the bravery to finally say them out loud for that matter, all I know is that my love is hurting and I have to make it stop.
He's shaking badly as he starts to pull away from me, and for a moment I'm terrified that he'll leave me completely, I'm getting ready to tighten my grip again when he stops and stares into my eyes.
Remy never uses his empathy on anyone without asking first because he's afraid people will think he's abusing the gift he thinks of as a curse, but he lets it go now, mostly out of shock I guess, and I take a deep breath and welcome it. Time seems to stand still as he searches my eyes for the truth. He gasps as my secret is revealed; disbelief and fragile hope shining in his eyes. "It's true," I whisper as I slowly raise a hand to brush back damp hair. I've never let myself believe I would ever have this chance, but here I am sitting on the floor of the den with my boy half draped across my lap. I take his face in my hands and dare to do the unthinkable... I kiss him.
My poor kid is still reeling, unable to take in all that has happened to him in this short amount of time, so I gently pull away and allow him the opportunity to move away from me and catch up. His hair is a tangle of damp russet curls, his eyes wide and unsure. He's panting; tiny puffs of breath that bathe me in heat and hope. He's still unable to find his voice, but he isn't running, and all I'm feeling from him is confusion, so I take the chance to try to explain. "I can't help it, Remy, I can't just sit still and stay quiet any longer." I slowly reach toward his face and his breath catches; his eyes drift close as I make contact. "I love you, kid. I don't know why it took me this long to act on it but it's true and I do and I *can't* watch her hurt you anymore. I *won't* watch it."
He pulls away from me and lets his head fall back against the wall, eyes still closed, "But I love her," I hear his heartfelt whisper and then I hear another shuddered breath.
"I know, Baby," I tell him quietly, then I prepare to watch as I have to add to his pain and break his heart even more, "But darlin', she doesn't love *you.*"
His closed eyes squeeze tightly and dampness forms but he holds onto his tears. He wraps his arms tightly around his stomach in a vain attempt to hold all the pent up emotions inside.
The beast erupts inside of me and I find myself fighting to keep my own pain in check. It physically hurts to watch him be torn apart like this. I hear another shuddered breath and then, "Logan?" It's all the invitation I need to open my arms and wait as he leans into them. This time he doesn't hold back the tears and the sadness and emptiness he feels forces my own to fall. I hold him for what feels like hours as he finally releases everything he's let build up inside. I take it all, glad that it's me here to save him at last.
He dozes in my arms as the light outside of the pulled drapes fades and the house becomes silent; sniffling and burrowing deeper into my arms as bad memories invade his sleep. I turn slightly and kiss his hair, closing my eyes again to better appreciate the fact that he's really here in my arms. This definitely isn't the way I saw our coming together being. He's still hurting and restless, and it'll take him a while to finally officially let her go, but I silently vow to him that he will never feel this way again if it's in my power to prevent it.
The door opens a crack and Ro's scent assures me that we're still safe. She enters silently and kneels beside us. Remy is lost in what I hope is peaceful sleep as she gently touches his face. She smiles at me as she places the throw from the back of the sofa over her brother. I hear the lock on the door turn softly and she silently leaves us again.
I pull my boy a little closer to my chest and settle in for the night if need be, I won't wake him just for my own comfort. I take a carefully soft but deep breath and smile because I am suddenly aware that that was the last time he'll ever be sad, or lonely, or feel unloved again.
I'm here with him now.
I'll make sure it's alright.
end