SquidgeWorld Archive

A Fine Mess
by Danii

You don't think when you're in love. You don't. You don't consider the consequences. You don't consider whether your parents will like him or not. You don't think about how your curfews going to have to be changed a bit so that you can date the guy of your dreams because he happens to be a vampire. Okay, maybe the last one only applies to me really, but you get the drift.

The vampire in question was Joe, my boyfriend. We'd met in a bar a while ago, and become friends. By our second meeting, the friendship had gone far deeper, and what had once seemed like a little crush became a full-blooded romance. The two of us were more then boyfriend and girlfriend. I didn't even like using that term; it made what we had seem so ordinary, so commonplace, when it really wasn't. We'd met only last month, but it felt as if I'd known him forever. And when he kissed me...well, it felt as if the earth and sky switched places, allowing me to fly with my feet on the ground. This was the real thing. Don't mistake me here; I don't fall in love once a week. I'm not like that at all. I'm a tough nut, one hard to crack. And Joe had taken the time to do it. I loved him for that.

Well, I loved him for everything. For his kindness, his manners, his sense of humor. The warm feeling in my heart that I got whenever he got near me. I even loved him for what he was, a vampire. Not that I had any firm ground to blame him, being a werewolf and all. 'Yeah, don't we make a fine pair', my mind constantly reminded me in a nagging tone. But to be perfectly honest, we did. Despite, or perhaps because of what we were, we had a lot of similarities. Such as an interest in books. And hot chocolate. And art. And a whole bunch of other things I can't think of on the spot. We both knew we had something special, something lasting, and I didn't want anything to go wrong.

But, as I said, you don't think of the consequences when you're in love. Nor do you think of how you're going to explain to your parents that you plan to attend your high school prom with a card-carrying member of the undead.

I wasn't worried about my mother. I knew she'd understand. According to her, she had once dated a vampire. Said he was a nice guy, never hurt anyone, with good taste and a kind soul. She'd added "kinda hot", but that wasn't relevant. In fact, my mother told me, it would have worked out, except for that fact that her family was forced to move to a different city. So no problem expected on that side...

My father was another matter entirely. He was the alpha of the pack/family, and the idea that his daughter was going to be dating a blood-sucking creature of the night instead of a nice normal werewolf boy was not going to make him a happy guy. Lord knows he'd probably be at the door with a stake and a wooden club next time Joe came to pick me up. I didn't know how I was going to break this to him, but I knew that it would be a bad idea to have Joe there when I did. Daddy would probably smash the dining room set apart and stake him with a chair leg. And wasn't that a nice mental picture?

Anyway, I told all this to Joe, and he took it well. As I said, he's a nice guy.

"Do you think it would hurt matters or help them to mention your age?" I asked.

"Probably hurt..." he answered with a pensive headshake, "Being a vampire is one thing, but a 300 year difference in age is going to tip the scales against you in any circumstance."

"You've got a point there, don't you? Though I can't think of another instance in which there would BE a 300 year age difference." I said teasingly. I was nervous, and when I get nervous, I start getting silly.

"But it might be a good idea, should he mention the blood drinking, that I drink blood only from cows. No humans or werewolves or anything..."

"Right" I said, listing the things in my head that I intended to use for my argument in favor of Joe. When I got through them, I walked over and sat in his lap. Joe took this opportunity to start nuzzling my neck. I leaned into his nuzzling, letting the loving gesture calm me.

"I'm worried, Joe. I want them to like you..."

He put his arms around me and everything was better.

"Don't worry, Luna..." he whispered soothingly into my ear, "It'll be all right. You said your father was fair, and a good man. I'm sure he'll understand..."

"But what if he doesn't" I wondered aloud, squiggling nervously in his embrace.

"He will..." Joe told me, again in that soft whisper, "And I love you, so it'll work out..."


I turned to face him. His lips were curved in a smile, but the smile seemed hopeful, as if he truly believed it. And his eyes were so full of love for me. It made me think I should believe it too. And maybe, deep in my heart, I did. I mean, why not? If a man who has lived for more than 300 years could believe in happily ever after, I certainly could.

"I love you too, Joe..." I said, putting my hand over where his heart had once beat, "And I want everyone to be happy for us."

He lifted his arm and stroked my hair tenderly. "I know, Luna, I know..."

"Thanks, Joe...thank you for being so damned nice..." I said. The tears, which had been forming inconspicuously in my eyes for the last few minutes, finally released and I could feel the warm, wet streaks as they ran down my face.

Joe looked upset for a moment, then, as he whispered loving, encouraging words to me, pulled me in and kissed me. It was sweet and loving and it sent a wonderful rush through my entire body, like living fire, but soft and cool; I wished it would never stop. It was decidedly satisfying. If Joe had been trying to make me feel better, he had done very well.

When we parted lips, Joe looked up to me with a wolfish grin. "Don't thank me, dear, I got just as well as I gave, thank you..."

I smiled back at him, the tears no longer there, then gave him a big hug.

"I love you, you know, Luna..." He said at last, "And when you're upset, it upsets me, so we can't be having anymore of this crazy unhappiness stuff...I won't have it, you hear me?"

"I heard you, you great lug!" I answered with a small chuckle. Somehow, he always managed to make my whole world better.

"Good" he told me with mock severity, "Because if it happens again, I shall have to give you a sound kissing!"

I tilted my head and gave him a look.

"Well," he admitted, "I shall have to do that anyway, but..."

"Go ahead," I dared him, "Make my day!"

"I don't do days..."

"Then make my night!"

"That I think I can pull..."

.............

"Hi, Mom."

"Hi, honey...where have you been?"

"With my boyfriend..."

"That's nice," she said, "but when are you going to bring him here to introduce him to us? This one seems serious...a whole month now..."

I didn't want to take the bait, but I did. "Oh yeah, Mom, I just date any loser I meet in a club..."

She looked a bit stunned, then continued. "I'm sorry, dear. I know you're extremely choosy and you have very good taste...I expect you got that from me. Anyway, I know you can take care of yourself, but could you at least tell me his name?"

The plea in her voice got me. I love my family very much, and I really did owe them an explanation, which I planned to give them tonight.

"Joseph Cohen." I answered shortly. Hopefully, Dad wouldn't use the information later to track him down and stake him with the dining room table leg.

"That's a nice name, dear. And if you're spending all that time with him, he must be quite a catch...what about his looks?"

"Well," I said in a labored voice, "He's tall, around 6'2", with dark brown hair, and deep green eyes. Classic good looks with added character from a broken nose. He's sort of lean, in a muscular way, and his hands are soft and gentle. His voice is smooth and deep, but-"

"You really love him, don't you?" asked my mother. She was either using maternal intuition, or I was being REALLY obvious. I think it was a combination of both.

"Yeah, Mom..." I said seriously, "I really do. And I really want you to like him..."

I don't know why, but my mother suddenly came over and put her arms around me. As she did, I could feel that familiar warm moisture running down my cheek, following the path of the tears that had gone before as they slid towards my throat. My mother's eyes widened as she saw my tears and she pulled me closer to smooth down my hair with a tender touch. It was so like what Joe had done earlier that I couldn't stop the sob from escaping me.

"It's all right, dear..." she whispered to me soothingly, "No need to cry. I'm sure your father and I will love this boy. He's obviously stolen your heart, little moon, and we know how locked up you keep that part of yourself, among others. Besides, it can't be all that bad..."

I looked up from my tears into eyes so similar to my own. "But what about Daddy? He'll never approve! I know it!"

"I don't know why you say that..." My mother said swiftly, "But, no matter who, or what, he is, I'll make sure your father gives him a fair shot, okay?"

I didn't have the voice to speak anymore. I was so touched. I just nodded and pulled away from my mother's arms. She let me go willingly, despite her instincts to hold me till I was all better, and I quickly rubbed the tears off my cheeks. When I felt like I could face the world, or at least my own mother, I put my head up and looked her in the eye.

"Thanks, Mom..."

She smiled at me warmly and I grinned back as best I could. When the emotion in the room calmed a bit, I grabbed my things and headed for my room.


"Mom! Dad! Can I speak to you two for a minute?"

I was sitting in the living room. Everything was set. I had all my points and arguments set in my mind, and I was confident, and above all, I knew I was right. Everything would be fine. That confidence remained with me until my parents walked into the room.

My mother, as always, looked cheerful and bright, her amber eyes shining with mirth. My father, on the other hand, looked as if he had gotten up on the wrong side of the universe. His black hair was disorderly, as if he had been putting his fingers through it all day, and his deep gray eyes held a look of annoyance, though I knew it wasn't for me...According to what I'd heard through the floor of my room, he'd had to deal with my Uncle Lupus today, who'd gotten himself into jail once again. It happened about twice a year, sometimes out of state when Uncle Lupus got really wild, though it was never anything more then charges of Disturbing the Peace. But it always bothered my father and left him in a bad mood. Which was, the little voice in my head said sarcastically, just perfect...

"What?" They both asked at the same time. It was uncanny, but I had learned that despite their differences in upbringing, size, and personality, that my parents had an almost eerie connection to each other. It was something, I figured, that came with loving someone deeply for a long time.

"Well, you know my boyfriend, Joe?" I asked nervously, squiggling in my seat.

"No, we don't. You haven't introduced us to him yet, and we thought you said you were going to soon..." My mother answered, her voice calm, yet questioning.

"Well, um..." Oh, crap... My mind was blank. Blank! Every single argument I had, every point, every stirring word I had formulated this afternoon had flown out of my head, leaving me with nothing but a great deal of nervousness. Crap...

"Yes?" My father prodded.

"Well, um, there's a really good reason why I didn't want you to meet Joe, and well..." My voice gave out. Damn, but this was hard. I mean, I could do public speaking no sweat, but telling my parents about Joe was proving much more difficult then the oral report on destructive cattle grazing I'd had to do a day ago. Much more difficult.

"Yes?" My mother asked with a helpful smile. She was trying to make it easier for me, but in all honesty, she was making it worse.

"Joe's a vampire and I love him!" I blurted out. Well, the load of crap was in the air. It was up to them to decide if it hit the revolving blades of death. I prayed silently that the wind was blowing the opposite direction. Not that they were giving me any indication.

Finally, after an eternity, my father's large tired gray eyes looked into my mother's amber ones. He did it sluggishly, as if the announcement had slowly time for all of us and not just me as I'd thought.

"Dear, our darling little daughter, the one who we've raised for 17 years, the one who we used to change, and wash; the girl who you taught to hunt and track, the girl I taught the Old Knowledge, our little girl has just told us she's in love."

My mom nodded solemnly, and my parents shared an unreadable look. Huh? Had they missed the big announcement? Didn't they hear the whole vampire part? They better have, because I didn't have enough courage left to say that bit again.

"Didn't you hear the first part, Dad?" I asked, more than a little nonplussed.

My Dad gave me a look, as if I was insane, and then gave a short chuckle. "What, that the boy's a vampire?"

I nodded violently. What the hell did he think I was talking about?

My mother looked at me, and then began to laugh. Laugh! My father joined in a moment later and they sat on the couch cracking up, for who knew what, while I was trying to admit to them something which could make or break my relationship! This was SO not cool.

"What the hell" I fumed, "are you laughing about?"

They stopped laughing for a moment, and looked me up and down. Then they began to laugh again, harder this time.

"What's so funny!?"

Finally, they sobered up and sat down properly. My father, who was wiping the beginnings of tears from his eyes, looked me straight in the face and, nearly laughing again, asked:

"Dear, sweet Luna, is that why you haven't introduced us to him before? Is that what you were so worried about? That the boy's a vampire?"

"Yes" I said icily.

"Honey, don't you know that one way of the ways to become a vampire is to die a werewolf? Your Aunt Dendra has been a vampire since you were ten!"

"No, Dad, I wasn't aware of that fact..." I said, the chill in my voice stemming straight from the deep pit of embarrassment in my stomach, "Of course that could be because YOU DIDN'T TELL ME!"

My father looked nonplussed for a moment, then looked to my mother. "You didn't tell her?"

My mother looked just as lost. "I thought you did..."

"No, you said you would tell her that."

My mother shook her head. "Nope. I was to take care of teaching her The Hunt. You said you would take care of the Old Knowledge."

"Yes, well... " My father flustered, "I just thought it was something that a mother should tell a daughter and..."

I glared at him.

"Well, you know now, sweety, so it doesn't matter does it?"

I glared. "I guess not." I was trying to sound friendly and forgiving, but it wasn't working.

However, as I was about to lecture my parents on the importance of communication and providing me with all information, the doorbell rang.

My father, looking for any excuse to get away from my rightful vengeance, ran to the doorway, with me right behind, and without even checking through the window, opened the door. I nearly dropped dead.

"Hi, Luna!" said Joe in a friendly tone. He even waved.

"Hello, Joe..." I answered, my voice lifeless.

My mother immediately caught on that he was THAT Joe, and ran to the door. She had the charming hostess smile on, and her arms were open. Dear God.

"Why Joseph, how nice of you to-" but for some reason she stopped.

"Dear GOD! Joseph! Joseph Fairmont?"

.........

Joe looked confused at my mother's reaction, but then looked at her a bit closer. A few seconds later, his befuddled expression changed to that of joy, and he immediately ran past my father and gave my mother a big hug. It seemed that I was asking this a lot but, what the hell?

"Oh my goodness, Lupina Lobon! I haven't seen you since the 1973! What happened to you and Mike? He said you left!"

My mother hugged him back. "Dear lord, that was a long time ago! My family moved, Joe!"

Meanwhile, my father and I were putting together the pieces and getting a picture. Mine wasn't complete, and so far it was taking me to a scary place.

"Mom, don't tell me you used to go with Joe!" I cried in horror. That would just....no!

My mom looked amused, then saw the expression of dismay on my face and quickly shushed my concerns. "No, Dear. But I was going with his protégé, Mike...it was pretty serious. But then my family moved here and Mike couldn't follow for certain reasons, so we broke up. But, oh dear, it's so nice to see you, Joe!"

Have you ever had your worldview completely and totally flipped beyond comprehension within minutes? Have you? Well, I will tell you now that it is one of the most unpleasant experiences in the known universe. Especially when it involves your lovelife and your parents...

My father waved a hand before my face. I blinked, and then grabbed it irritably.

"So, I'm guessing you have no problems with me and Joe going out?" I asked in a stupor.

My father cocked his head sideways. "Well, we'd like to have a nice sit down dinner and all with him, but we have no problem with you and he having a relationship. He is one of your mother's old friends."

I soaked that in, then turned to Joe. "Isn't that great?"

"Of course, dear" he answered, disengaging from my mother. He then walked over to me and pulled me into a comforting embrace. It did help, but I was mad and remained stiff instead of leaning into him like I always did.

"I'm awful sorry, Luna..." he whispered to me, "I just wanted to meet them. And I knew you'd be able to sway them to your side and...and I never knew that your mother was...who she was. I'm sorry to upset you, honey..."

I couldn't stay mad at him. I couldn't. I mean, I knew he loved me, and that he'd never do anything to hurt me on purpose. And I loved him. I allowed my body to melt into him, telling him without words that I accepted his apology. He smiled a small smile, then began to rock me soothingly with his arms, slowly pulling me towards the couch. When we sat, I nudged him, telling him to loosen up for a moment. My parents were in the room, and if he did that any longer, we'd end up kissing and then.... Not a good way to sway parental units in favor of your boyfriend.

I was about to speak, but my father spoke first. "Honey, you don't have to say anything. We understand. It was the same way with your mother and I" they held hands, "They thought we were too young, but eventually they understood. Seeing you two right now, holding one another, Joe comforting you, Luna, we knew just what that was like. We know this is no teenage crush, but real love. And, looking the man up and down, I trust him. You have our full support in this."

Damn good thing I taught him to dress then...If they'd seen him like I saw him our first night out, I doubt they would have let him in the door, let alone trust him. But, my mind was shouting with joy, they liked him. They liked Joe! They had no problem with him. Sing the Songs of Joyous Praise for the Lord; they liked him!

I turned and looked at Joe, who was smiling his head off. "Told you so..."

"What do you mean, 'told you so'?" I asked with a grin.

"I told you that, because I love you, everything would be okay...Told you so."

Well, to my mind, there was only one way to shut him up. I kissed him hard on
the lips.
My parents laughed. When I stopped kissing him, Joe smiled up at me.

"Not a bad night, eh?"

"No, not at all..."

Fin