SquidgeWorld Archive

Lucky...that's what everybody has been saying to Don Flack this past week.

After all, how many people survive having a building explode around them?
Oh yeah, Don's been one lucky bastard all right...lucky to have ended up with a hole in his belly and half his insides on the outside. Lucky that he's lying here in the I.C.U., tubes going every which way around his body. Lucky to have countless stitches holding his insides in place.

Don knows on one level that he *is* lucky. The blast could have easily killed him outright...he could easily have bled to death before being rescued. Heck, if Mac Taylor hadn't been there on the spot and known what to do, then Ma Flack's little boy would be resting in a hole in the ground right about now. Baby blue eyes shut forever. A nice big policeman's funeral, goodbye and R.I.P.

There's been times though he wishes he hadn't been quite so 'lucky'. Like when his doctor told him that his recovery could be measured in months rather than weeks...or that it was likely to be a case of 'if' rather than 'when' he could return to work. Don's trying not to think of the implications of that. Trying not to think about what it might mean to be off the job for good, or at best confined to a desk and getting intimately acquainted with the Precinct photocopier. He's had enough of photocopiers. Having one practically land on him has put Don off the things for life. But hey, he was 'lucky', wasn't he? The thing could have smashed him flat instead of just cracking blue toner stuff all around him. And if it hadn't been for the blue stuff, they'd never have figured out who the bomber was. Yeah, looks like they all got lucky with that one.

Danny told him all about it last time he visited. How Mac and Stella figured out who was doing all the bombs, how he and Mac had to defuse one of them, how Mac was able to talk the bomber into surrendering. Don likes to think of himself as a fair guy, but sometimes he can't help but think that maybe it's a pity Mac was able to talk that guy down unharmed. Don doesn't like himself much for thinking that sort of thing; after all, he's a cop. Sworn to protect and serve etc. Even those who don't necessarily deserve it. But when he's lying here all alone, with only the beeping machines for company, and wondering if he's ever gonna feel like normal again, Don's mind tends to go to dark places.

Not that Don is alone a hell of a lot. Seems like the nurses are checking up on him every five minutes, and it feels like he's had a constant stream of visitors what with friends and relatives and colleagues and everything. Sometimes Don wishes they'd just leave him alone. He's tired of having to keep a smile on his face and pretend like everything is gonna be just fine. He wishes they'd leave him alone...but a part of him doesn't want to be left alone...a part of him is afraid that if he's left alone too long then he'll wake up and find himself back in the rubble, his guts falling out, and nobody there to save him and all he can do is lie there and feel his life's blood draining away.

And Don knows that it's something that could easily have happened. He admittedly sort of zoned out a bit when his Doctor was explaining his injuries, but Don knows that if it hadn't been for Mac's quick thinking that he'd have bled to death before help could have arrived. A part of him is still just a little resentful that of the three people in the building when it blew, he's the only one who didn't get to just walk away. But it's only a small part, because Don knows that if the positions had been reversed, then he would have had to stand there and watch Mac die and that wouldn't have been lucky for either of them, no way.

So Don knows that in spite of all the evidence to the contrary, he can still count himself lucky. Maybe not so lucky as to not get hurt in the first place, but that's part of the job and he's always known that it came with a price. And he *was* lucky not to have been killed outright, and doubly lucky that Mac was in the right place at the right time. Heck, maybe he's even lucky that that office kid was wearing lace up's to work that day.

And Don knows that he's luckier than some of the poor suckers in the hospital with him that don't got nobody to look out for them. The way his friends and family and fellow officers have rallied round. He knows that with them to back him up, he'll be able to face whatever the future holds for him. He knows it's not gonna be easy, but he's Don Flack and he can take whatever life dishes out.