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"Hold me. Please, just hold me for a minute and then I'll..." Nick's voice in the darkness stopped, but Gil could hear the resignation, the guilt and shame of needing to put his friend and boss in this position. The guilt and shame of a child afraid of the dark and what might be hidden in it. "Then I'll go back...to sleep..."
*Back to Her in your nightmares, you mean. Ah, Nicky. Nicky, don't you know I'd never leave you to face her alone? Too many years you had to see her in your dreams, feel her in the one place where you couldn't escape, the only place she could ever have power over you since you became an adult. Your dreams, your nightmares; they're all in your fears, Nick. You'd never have to fear her again, if only I could step into your dreams and banish her once and for all. But until that day comes, Nicky, all I can do is what you ask.*
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have..."
"Shush, Nick." A sight shake of his head to clear the fog of too many thoughts, too many consequences of where this might lead, Grissom knew what he was going to do; never had he tried to fool himself into believing otherwise.
His body moved toward the bed, slowly as if not to startle, a hand reaching out to lift the covers on one side, body shifting in to lay facing him on the edge, leaving plenty of room for Nick to back away. Or move closer.
"Gil?" Brown eyes looked at him in the dark.
And blue eyes answered back. "I'm here."
The brief smile was instantaneous, unsure with nerves and relief. "You sure you don't mind?"
"It's okay." Lying under the blankets, pajamas, robe, slippers and all, Grissom held out his arms, and heard the small sob as the younger man lurched into them.
"...thanks..." Muffled, small and watery, Gil almost missed it. Would have if not for the lips moving to form the gratitude into his skin. Head buried in his neck, Nick held on tightly, releasing all of the emotion that had woken him in the first place, and Gil just held him.
"It's okay." One hand cupped in the short, dark hair, the other stroked lightly along his spine, tshirt shifting up and down with the movement of his fingers. Silently he offered his presence, his support while softly crooning nonsense words of comfort he knew Nick longed to hear. "I'm here. You're safe and I'm here. It's okay..."
That it was okay to want - to need to be touched. To want and need human contact.
It was okay to not want to be alone.
*All I can do is hold you.*
End