Chapter Text
Title: Even a strong man
Author: Ceindreadh
Email: Ceindreadh@eircom.net
Website: N.A.
Permission to archive: Yes to WWOMB, anybody else ask first.
Fandom(s): NCIS
Genre (general, hetero or slash) Slash
Pairing/Characters: Gibbs/McGee
Rating: FRT 17
Summary: Sometimes even the strongest of men needs somebody to lean on.
Warnings: Slash, hurt/comfort, spoilers for Twilight, little bit of angst and maybe tissues required.
Disclaimer. I don't own the NCIS characters, I'm only borrowing them, and I promise to return them in good condition when I'm finished.
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Even the strongest of men sometimes needs somebody to lean on.
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Gibbs was the strongest man that McGee knew. Maybe not the strongest physically; McGee had seen plenty of bodybuilders who could have probably lifted Gibbs over their heads one handed. But not all strength was of the physical variety, and while Tony might have had the edge over Gibbs in an arm wrestling contest, if McGee was asked off the top of his head to name the stronger of the two, he'd have picked Gibbs straight away.
But Gibbs didn't look strong either physically or emotionally right now. Hospitals tended to drain the strength out of a person, especially when you were just sitting there waiting...waiting to see if your colleague...your friend...would live or die.
It seemed to McGee that they'd been there for hours...days even, waiting for the surgeon to finish operating on Tony.
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The case had gone badly from the start. With few leads in the investigation, Gibbs had been forced to put Tony in undercover, in the hopes that having him pose as a prospective seller of stolen goods that he could find the property they were trying to track. Not that the property itself was that important, but the owner - the wife of a marine - had been injured when she'd interrupted the burglars.
So Tony had put on a wire and a smile and 'Gus Bricker' had been resurrected to charm his way into the good books of a fence who was reputed to be the guy they were looking for. Unfortunately Tony's charms had failed, and he'd been outed as a cop before he could get the fence to incriminate himself.
Things had gone from bad to worse, and by the time Gibbs and McGee - who'd been listening to the proceedings - had fought their way through assorted lowlifes, Tony was lying on the ground, bleeding from a pair of gunshot wounds.
"Dammit DiNozzo, don't you dare die on me!" Gibbs was yelling as he tried to stop the bleeding.
"Guess...guess I messed up, Boss," Tony forced a smile onto his lips. "Sor...sorry..." He groaned in pain as Gibbs applied more pressure to Tony's abdomen.
"Shut up, DiNozzo," growled Gibbs.
McGee had phoned for paramedics, and now he crouched down beside Tony, wishing he'd paid more attention in the first aid course that both he and Tony had attended the previous year. Tony hadn't been paying much attention either, but whereas Tony's attention had been focused on the pretty young paramedic who'd been assisting the lecturer, McGee had been focusing on trying not to lose his lunch as the lecturer detailed the type and treatment of all the injuries they were likely to sustain in the field.
All he could think to do was shrug off his jacket and place it under Tony's head in an effort to make Tony more comfortable.
"Tha...thanks, Probie," said Tony, weakly. His hand moved sluggishly and McGee grabbed it, squeezing it as if in an effort to lend some of his strength to his friend.
"The ambulance is on its way, Tony," said McGee, as reassuringly as it was possible for him to be, with Tony bleeding all over the floor in front of him. "Just hang in there, it won't be too much longer..."
It was only a few minutes, but it felt like an eternity before the paramedics arrived and took over. One of them tried to examine Gibbs, seeing that he had a gash on his head that had been sustained during the fight to reach Tony's side. But Gibbs just glared at him and said that Tony was the one needing all the attention so the paramedic backed down.
And now they sat in the hospital waiting room, both of them wondering if they'd ever see Tony alive again.
McGee was the first one to break the silence, "Um, Boss...you've got Tony's blood on your hands..."
"I know," said Gibbs, his voice more subdued than McGee had ever heard it. "God, do you think I don't *know* that? I should never have sent him in there alone, and without even a vest. God, what the hell was I thinking?" He pushed himself up from the chair and started pacing back and forth. "Of course I know what everybody will be thinking if Tony doesn't...doesn't make it." He laughed hollowly. "Gibbs the jinx. Two of his team down and only one to go." Gibbs stopped pacing and looked at McGee. "You want to transfer to a team where the guy in charge takes better care of his team, be my guest. Hell, you obviously think it's all my fault anyway."
He stalked over to a wall, and for a second McGee thought he was going to put his fist through it, but instead he just braced himself against it, looking as if he wanted to push it down with his bare hands.
McGee stood and walked over to Gibbs. He warily put his hand on the older mans shoulder. "Boss, I don't blame you for what happened to Tony. He was the one who made the decision to go without a vest because it would have looked odd wearing a jacket on a day this hot." McGee took a deep breath before continuing. He knew he wasn't great at this sort of thing. Tony would have been much better...he would have had Gibbs feeling a lot more like Gibbs with just a few quick comments. Kate would have known what to say as well, but she was dead and Tony could be dying and McGee knew that he was the only person that Gibbs had right at that moment to lean on. "I don't blame you for Kate's death either. Neither does Tony. Ari was the one who made the decision to pull the trigger, and nothing you said or did would have changed his mind once he'd made it up."
Gibbs looked at McGee. "Yeah, right. Kate's blood is on my hands, just like Tony's." He started to push McGee away, but the younger agent caught him by the wrist before he could touch him.
"I was talking *literally*, Boss," said McGee, keeping firm hold of Gibbs's wrist with one hand and pulling out a handkerchief with the other. "You got his blood on you when you were saving his life." He started wiping the blood away. "I'm surprised the E.R. nurses didn't clean it off when they sutured your head." McGee looked up from his ministrations just in time to catch a sheepish look flicker across Gibbs's face. "Ah, let me guess. You glared and yelled and made them so nervous that they gave you a needle and thread and told you to do it yourself?"
This time there was a definite uplifting of the lips as Gibbs said, "Close, but I didn't make them cry until *after* they'd stitched me up." He sighed heavily. "Dammit McGee, I should have made Tony wear the vest. I should have gone in with him...or instead of him."
"This isn't your fault," said McGee.
"No, but it's my responsibility. Just like Tony is, just like you are...like Kate was..." Gibbs took a deep breath. "Whatever happens to somebody on my team, happens to me. Or at least it feels that way. The bottom line is, I'm the one in charge, and I'm the one who should take the hit. That's why they pay me the big bucks." The last was said in a more sarcastic tone than McGee had ever heard Gibbs use before. "I'm the one who should have been in the firing line."
"No," said McGee, firmly, with more authority in his tone than he'd ever used when contradicting Gibbs. At the back of his mind he was thinking that maybe disagreeing with Gibbs and pissing him off wasn't the best thing he could be doing right now, but he couldn't let Gibbs wallow in guilt any longer.
"No, Boss," repeated McGee. "You're the guy in charge, the guy who has to send us into situations that we may not come out of...but you're also the guy who'll move heaven and earth to get us out of there in one piece, and whatever the dangers, I know you'll always have my back. Tony knows that as well, there's nobody we'd rather have looking out for us than you."
There was silence between the two men, and then Gibbs's expression changed, and McGee was sure he was going to bite his head off...and then he saw that Gibbs wasn't looking at him, but at a point over his shoulder...where the surgeon had just walked into the room.
McGee could hear his heart pounding as they waited for the surgeon's verdict.
"How is he, Doc?" Only somebody who had spent the last year working side by side with Gibbs would have noticed the slight waver in his voice. "Is he..."
"He's fine," said Doctor Harte, his voice calm and reassuring. "Or at least he will be once his injuries have had time to heal."
McGee zoned out slightly as the Doctor recited the list of damage the bullets had done to Tony's body. All he could focus on was that Tony was going to recover. Oh sure, he'd be battered and bruised and probably off work for several weeks if not longer, but the main thing, the only important thing, was that he was still alive.
"Can I see him?" McGee tuned back in to hear Gibbs ask this.
"Not tonight," replied Doctor Harte. "He's still very weak from blood loss and the anesthesia. I don't expect him to be ready for visitors till at least the morning."
"Then I'll wait here until morning," said Gibbs. He took a step towards the chair he'd been sitting on earlier, only to sway slightly.
McGee caught him quickly and lowered him to the chair. Doctor Harte crouched down in front of Gibbs and quickly took his pulse. Or at least he tried to; Gibbs pushed his hands away before he could count more than a few beats. "I'm fine, dammit," he snapped, sounding more like his usual self.
"You don't look fine to me," said Harte. "I should have one of the ER doc's take a look at you."
"They already did," growled Gibbs. "It's just a bang on the head, mild concussion, if that."
"Hmm, well I think it might be no harm to admit you overnight..." Doctor Harte saw the look on Gibbs face and added quickly, "Or at the very least you should go home and rest. There's nothing you can do here. I promise I'll have the nurses phone you if there's the slightest change in Agent DiNozzo's condition. But really, you'll do him no good by making yourself sick."
It was probably the head injury, but Gibbs agreed to the Doctor's suggestion without much argument. Possibly the fact that the Doctor threatened to have him admitted forcibly, on the grounds that he wasn't able to look after himself properly, was a contributing factor.
"And you should have somebody stay with you tonight," said the Doctor. "Get them to check you every few hours."
"I'll do it," said McGee quickly, seeing that Gibbs was about to argue. "There's a spare bed at my place, Boss. It's nearer to the hospital as well...just in case..." He didn't need to finish the sentence.
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to be continued