Work Text:
Everything I Need To Know I Learned From Batman
Senior Thesis
by Aya
AyaJJ@aol.com
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes this really was my Senior Thesis for Advanced Compostition, yes it was a college class, yes I passed, and YES this essay earned the only A in the class :) Hope you like it.
The Dark Knight. The Caped Crusader. Batsy. Batman is what most of us, at one time or another, have wished we could be: a hero. He doesn't have super powers, like invulnerability, but is just an extraordinary individual doing the best he can with what he's got; an average guy with above-average expectations of himself. In short, he's a great role model. I remember watching Batman on TV when I was younger. I loved the adventure, action, and (after I started reading the comic) the humanity of the character. Over the years, I can say I learned a great deal from him. I say 'him' because I see him as one of my mentors, and often see myself much like Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, and Tim Drake: learning as his protégé. He has taught me a great deal, much of which I use everyday. While some of his lessons were quite exotic (how to survive direct impact with a wrecking ball), the bulk of them helped to make me the person I am today:
Basic black is suitable for all occasions, from museum openings to crime scene investigation.
Make sure your accessories are functional yet fashionable: a yellow utility belt dramatically sets off black or red kevlar.
Always be physically fit: let's face it, spandex and flab just don't work together.
Remember where you park: voice recognition does NOT come standard on most model cars.
Brains have it over brawn 95% of the time: what makes the Joker dangerous is his mind.
The other 5% of the time, strategic retreats are acceptable: running has saved everyone's life at least once
Never underestimate your opponent: arrogance has doomed many a villain.
Women are NOT the weaker sex: Harley Quinn and Catwoman have come closest to eliminating him.
Remember to think of a Plan B: Nine times out of ten you don't need it, but...
Never be afraid to ask for help: even Batman has Robin.
Call home often: it gives Alfred time to find Bactine.
Be prepared: sometimes one grappling hook isn't enough.
Everyone needs a break now and then: let the police handle things for the night.
Never trust exotic plant life: you never know when you will develop a 'killer' allergy.
No one is above the law, not even the hero.
Yes, there is justice in the world. It may take a while, but it does exist.
One person can make a difference: Batman never wanted to change the world as a whole, just his part of it. Along with other superheroes, changing the world is possible. We just need to work together.
I don't have super powers, I am not independently wealthy (yet), I don't have an armor-plated car that goes Mach 10. But I can make an impact in my little corner of the world. As long as I remember to do the best I can with what I've got, who knows? Maybe someday instead of a bat, you will see a giant J in the sky.
Hey, anything's possible...
END