SquidgeWorld Archive

We bought my son a 94 Ford Tempo when he was seventeen. It wasn't a great car, but better than anything I had when I was growing up. But now five years later, the Chihuahua, as it had been dubbed, needed to be replaced. We had told the youngster when we gave him the Tempo that it would be the last vehicle we purchased for him. The next one was on him.

For the last year or so we had been talking with him about selling the Chihuahua for a few hundred dollars and getting a loan to purchase something newer. Alas, the Chihuahua beat us to the punch by dying a sudden death on the side of the highway on the way home from the grocery store with ice cream melting in the backseat. Now instead of getting a few hundred out of it, we paid someone seventy-five to haul it off. I guess the Chihuahua got the last laugh.

My husband is a retired car salesman, so with my son in need of a car it made sense for my husband to go along and help him out. Of course the best thing would be to go to one of hubby's friends who still sold cars, but seeing that my son has expensive tastes, none of these friends sold anything that the child would even consider driving.

So the kid got online and found a dealership that had a 2000 Volkswagen bug. He and Hubby drove to the far side of town to check out the car. This is where the fun began.

"This car is a program car that been on the lot for fifty three days so we just discounted it by two thousand dollars." The salesman told my husband. "It also has four brand new tires." Now anyone could tell by looking that the tires were not new, but they were in good shape so Hubby decided to let this slide, for now anyway. As for the length of time on the lot, fifty-three days is quite a bit of time in the car business so it made sense that they would have discounted to move it.

The son took it for a test drive and fell in love. Husband noticed that it had a slight rattle. "Make sure you write up a 'we owe' so that we can bring that back for you to fix later," he insisted.

The kid was in love with the car, so they agreed on a price and headed to the finance department. "If we get this car certified we can get the kid qualified as a first time buyer and have him on the loan by himself, other wise we need a co-signer." My mother had already agreed to co-sign if needed her, but it would be so much better if we could avoid that. Plus, having a pre-certified car would mean that he had a better warrantee, and since my son barely knows how to check the oil, a warrantee is pretty important.

Okay, see this is when we should have noticed things weren't right. Well, to be honest, Hubby did notice, but he knew the kid wanted this car so bad that he let a few things slide, like that one of the things that needed to be done before the car could be certified was that it would need two new tires. So much for four news ones that the salesman said it had.

I don't understand how a car gets certified, but I guess there's a time limit on either how old the car is, or something like that. Anyway this car missed its deadline by three weeks so it couldn't be pre-certified. So now we are back to the finance guy. He finds he can still get the deal done without anything down as long as there's a co-signer. The kid is happy and the deal is just about finished when in walks the manager. He shakes Hubby's hand and says, "Oh, you're buying the bug. We just got that in six days ago."

Now that changes everything. See if the car has only been on the lot six days then there has been no discount and suddenly we are not getting that good of a deal. Hubby really considers walking away from the deal right then and there, then he thinks about how much the son likes this car, and then he thinks about having to start all over looking for another car, and he decides to keep his mouth shut. That was our first mistake.

By now it is getting late and Hubby needs to get the car he is driving home to me so I can go to work. He and the kid part ways, Hubby to go home and Son to go get his grandmother to co-sign his loan.

My son calls me later on his cell phone while he is driving his car home. "They had to change something so they had different papers for me to sign when I got back with Grandma," he tells me.

"What did they change?" I ask.

"I'm not sure, but they said it was nothing to worry about."

Again, warning bells are going off, but it seems a bit late to do anything. I mean, the car is bought, the papers are signed, nothing to do but hope for the best.

I speak to my son on the phone most everyday and now with a new, or should I say newer car to talk about, we are tying up the phone lines.

"So how are you liking the car?"

"Oh, it's great. I go to the window and just look out at it," he gushes. "But I do wish I would have gotten a CD player installed."

"I thought you were going to add one later."

"Yeah, well, I looked and they are five hundred bucks. Oh, and I checked on getting another key made, the key is a hundred and the fob is two hundred."

"What? Why? How can a key cost so much?" I am shocked.

"'Cause it's electronic," he answered.

"Damn, and they only gave you one? That's not good. Not with your history of losing your keys."

"Yeah, well, the car is cool though, Mom."

"Glad to hear."

A few days later...

"The sun roof is really hard to close once you get it open, and the rattle is back."

And then ...

"Maybe this car wasn't such a good idea. The windshield leaks and the body has more hail damage than I thought."

"Shit, have you called them on the rattle?" I ask.

"I called the service department to make an appointment to get the rattle fixed. I told them about the windshield, sunroof and the key, they said they would take care of it all."

"Well, that's good. So you'll be down on Tuesday?"

"Yeah, hopefully they can fix everything in one day. I don't know, Mom, the car is starting to make me nervous. I mean, what else am I going to find wrong with it?

The next day my husband and I are sitting around the house when the phone rings.

Hubby looks at the caller ID. "It's the dealership."

"Oh, shit," I say.

He answers. I hold my breath.

So it seems that the bank has kicked back the loan because the car isn't a program car, it is a used car. The bank won't do the loan without a down payment. Which means we are paying over loan value on the car, not a good sign. Again I'm not sure what the difference is between a program car and a used one, but Hubby says it's a big deal so I believe him. The dealership has found another bank that will do the loan without anything down but they need the son and Grandma to come back and sign different papers.

This is not good. Hubby is pissed. He has been lied to, he has been cheated, and he has been taken for a ride. It is bad enough to fuck us over, but to do that to our son, well you know what they say...

So I call the son to see just how badly he wants this car since it seems as though we could walk away right now. They have misrepresented the car they sold us, and the kid is driving the thing with no signed loan papers.

He and Hubby have a long talk and decide that on Tuesday, when he is to bring the car down for the service department to fix, Hubby will go with him and they will have a chat with the general manager. This should be good!

After my husband met the general manager and explained all the things wrong with the car and all the lies the salesman told, there really wasn't much the manager could say. So, after my husband's great negotiating skills they settled on the same price for the car, but with a factory CD player installed, the rattle, the windshield and sun roof fixed, the hail damage repaired and a new key and fob, plus a loaner car for the son to take back with him until his car was fixed.

Hubby came home feeling that he had at least gotten the kid a better deal, maybe not a great deal, but definitely better than the one he had almost ended up with.

But no, the fun wasn't over yet.

A couple of days later the son called. "Mom, I need to talk to Dad, the dealership just called and they aren't going to put the CD player in now."

"What would be their reason?" I ask.

"That it's going to cost them too much, they won't make any money."

"Oh, that's bullshit. I'll go tell your dad. We'll call you back."

Husband was lying down in bed, not really sick, just not feeling up to snuff, so he was less than thrilled with my news. After looking up the phone number he grabbed the cordless phone and trucked off to the other room for some privacy. I not sure what he said to them, but he brought the phone back and told me to call the kid and tell him that the car would be ready next week and the CD player would be installed.

So then the absolute kicker happened...

I was at work a few days later when my husband called, "Are you ready for me to make your day?"

"Um, my DVD's finally arrived?" I ask

"Better yet, the kid just called, his loaner car was stolen," he tells me.

"You're kidding? Right?" I can't help but laugh, my son just can't seem to catch a break . Now I know he lives in a rather questionable neighborhood, but still, this is a bit much.

"He said he had been having trouble with the alarm on the car so he didn't think much when it went off earlier, then he walked out to go to work this afternoon and the car is gone."

"Did he call the police?" I ask.

"No, not yet. I told him to call the police and then the dealership and then call me back," Hubby says.

"Okay, let me know what happens." I hang up the phone and begin telling my co-workers the latest in the saga.

A few minutes later my phone rings again. This time it's my kid. "Do you have a phonebook handy? I can't find the number for the dealership."

"Yeah, hang on, I'll look it up. What did the police say?" I ask while I grab the phonebook.

"That they won't do anything until I can give them the VIN and tag numbers. So I need to call the dealership to get those."

"Okay, I'm looking. So how did they steal it? I thought that was the purpose of those three hundred dollar keys."

"I know, VW's aren't supposed to be able to be stolen. There's no broken glass or anything, so I can't figure out how they would have taken it. Maybe one of my neighbors called and complained and had it towed."

"Complained about what?"

"The alarm has gone off a few times."

"Well, that would be better than being stolen. If it was stolen you're going to have to have a talk with your roommate about getting you some off street parking, like maybe in the back yard." We are both laughing at the absurdity of the whole situation.

"Okay, here's the number. Call me back and let me know what happens."

It's not too much later when he calls back. "The dealership couldn't tell me the info on the loaner car. They said that they would have to go figure out which one I had."

"Really. It seems they would want to keep track of that," I say.

"Yeah, so now I have to wait for them to call me back, and in the meantime someone is driving the loaner car around. It seems that maybe the police could at least look around my neighborhood."

"Have you called into work yet?"

"Yeah, and my boss is going to quit believing me one of these days. I mean no one has this kind of luck," he sighs.

I have to chuckle. "Yes, you seem to have bad car karma."

"No shit," he laughs.

"So call me back when you hear something."

"'Kay."

It was a couple of hours later before he called me back, but when he did....

"The police just called, they have my car," he announces.

"Great, where was it?"

"In impound. The dealership reported it stolen."

"No way!"

"Way. It seems the police were patrolling the neighborhood and called them to see if they were aware of the car here, I guess since it's a different town, anyway, the dealership said it was theirs, so it must have been stolen and then someone asked that it be towed."

"And the dealership didn't tell you this when they called you back with the info on the car?" I ask.

"Nope," he says.

"So how do you get the car back?"

"They have to fax something in writing to the police saying that it is okay to release the car to me."

"So this is what you are working on now? Getting the car back?"

"Yeah, my roommate is on his way to pick me up and take me to impound. I have a call into the general manager of the dealership to tell them where to fax the letter."

"Well, call me once you have the car back. Maybe you can make a sign to hang in the back window."

"That says what? 'This car is not stolen'?" he snorts

"Yep."

Oh, but now it gets even better.

"Mom, it's going to cost one hundred and thirty dollars to get the car out. They won't take a credit card over the phone so I'll have to put it on mine, but the dealership says they won't reimburse me."

"What? Why?" I ask.

"They said that if I had wrecked the car it would be up to me or my insurance company to take care of it, and the same with this."

"But they are the ones that reported it stolen."

"I know. I have tried to get a hold of Dad so he could call them, but he's not answering the phone," he says.

"No, he's outside working," I take a deep breath. I really don't want to do this. "Okay, I'll call them. Don't get the car out until I call you back. If they won't agree to reimburse you then you'll go rent a car and leave theirs in impound. Have you asked if your car is ready yet?"

"Yes, I asked, and it's not."

"Okay, call you back." Now I am getting pissed. I hate to have to call people up and be a bitch, but it seems that's what this is going to take.

I dial the number to the dealership. "I need to talk to the general manager."

"One moment."

I wait.

"This is Sean, how may I help you?"

I explain who I am and ask him why he won't pay to get the car out of impound.

"I offered to pay half."

"Half?" I ask. "Why only half?"

"I don't see why I should have to cover this."

"I don't see why you shouldn't," I reply.

"The police officer told me the car was abandoned on the side of the road. I asked if the keys were in it and he said no, so I asked if they could leave the car there until I could come get it and he said no, so what else could I do? They told me to report the car stolen."

Okay, now the general manager is telling me lies. . Time to turn into Uber Bitch. "I don't want to say you're making this up, but why would the police say it was abandoned on the side of the road? It was parked, legally, in a residential area, in front of my son's house. Did you check to see if it was maybe a loaner car that one of your customer's had?" I ask.

"I don't have any way of checking that."

Yeah, right, now I want to get them to loan me a car. "See, now, I'm just having a hard time understanding why the police would tell you this. The car was in no way abandoned. And I really have an even harder time believing that you don't keep track of who you loan your cars to."

"That's what they said, so I don't see why I should have to pay for it to come out of impound," he argues.

"Well, maybe if this was the first thing that had gone wrong, but do you remember who my son is? Do you remember the whole incident of him buying his car?"

"No, I'm afraid I don't.

"Well then, let me refresh your memory." Mega Uber Bitch just kicked in. "You sold the car to him under false pretenses. Sold it to him as a program car, when it wasn't. You changed the loan papers after my husband left while my son was going to get his grandmother to co-sign. Then when the bank kicked it back you wanted him to bring in a down payment. Am I refreshing your memory? So finally my husband went over there and insisted you fix all the stuff that was wrong on the car to begin with. So it is your fault because if you hadn't lied to him and tried to fuck him over then he wouldn't be driving your damn loaner now, and you are the one that reported it stolen and asked it be towed instead of taking the time to see who you had loaned the car out to," I shout.

Whew. Well I felt better anyway.

"I'm sorry to hear that you had so much trouble. I hate to think that you are less than pleased with your experience with us," he says. Less than pleased... ha. Understatement of the year.

He continues, "Have your son pick up the car out of impound and I'll reimburse him when he comes here to get his car."

"Thank you." I hang up, and call my son. "Go get the car, they will reimburse you."

It was the next day before I got a chance to talk to him again.

"Did you get the car?" I ask.

"Yes, but what a hassle. You won't believe this. They faxed a letter that said I could pick up the car, but it was on plain paper. The cops just laughed when they saw it. So, I called the general manager and get this... he told me they don't have letterhead."

"Just how stupid do they think we are?"

"Exactly. So I told him I didn't care if he had to get on the computer and make some. It was almost time for impound to close. I told him he had five minutes or he would have to pay for another day in impound."

"What an idiot," I say.

"You know, you have to practice to be that bad at customer service."

"So is your car ready?" I ask.

"Oh. Yes it is. I'll be down on Saturday."

"Okay, I want to go with you to get it."

"Yes, please."

Saturday arrives and we meet to go pick up his car. The service department closed early and for a moment I thought they were going to tell us that we had to come back on Monday. Finally they find the keys and my son and I go to look the car over and make sure the repairs were done, and done right.

I will have to say that they did a good job fixing the hail damage and the sunroof now works. They also had a new key and fob, so the kid has two, in case he loses one. We open the truck, and no CD player. I tell them I need to see the general manager, but of course he isn't there that day. "Well, then I need to see who ever is in charge."

While I'm waiting the sales manager comes to tell us that they have the CD player, they just didn't get it installed. We can either take it and they will mail us the brackets or we can bring the car back to have it installed. See, the parts department is closed also, so they can't even get the brackets needed to install the thing.

Un-fucking-believable.

Well, I don't want to ever have to deal with these people again so we agree to install it ourselves. It really isn't hard; it's just the principle of it.

Next, I ask who I need to see to get a check to reimburse us for the impound towing fees. Nope, can't do that on a weekend. In fact, the general manager won't be back until Wednesday, which is the soonest I can have a check.

I turn to my son and tell him to go drive the car and make sure the rattle is gone. While he is gone I have a long talk with the sales manager. I tell him the whole long sad story and he has to agree that he would be upset, too. When he tries to play it off as a problem with the salesman I am quick to point out that the general manager told us just as many lies. "It seems to me that the lying starts with your management. For all I know, your sales department is being told to lie."

The sales manager, Don, then said to me, "My daddy was a Pentecostal preacher and he used to always say that in everything in life you learn a lesson."

I had to chuckle at this. "Yes, he did learn a lesson. He learned that people will lie, cheat and try to fuck him over. What a legacy you all have going on here. You should be proud."

It was about then that my son drove back up in his car and declared it 'good enough'.

We then proceeded to take the dealership's emblem off his car. No way we want to advertise for them. I don't even want to admit I went there in the first place.

The kid headed back home, I told him I would mail the check as soon as I picked it up.

Wednesday came and my mother and I stopped in to pick up the check to be reimbursed for impound and I have to say that, although the guy was a complete asshole, he did write us out a check.

As my son said, you have to practice to be this bad.