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2020-11-04
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Ghost

Summary:

Rating: language and innuendo
Content: Slash /Law and Order Universe. Light fun stuff.
Alex returns from witness protection for one episode to save the day. Abbie gets smashed. Olivia is not herself.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to L&O and Mr. Wolfe. Our apologies to Mariska and her hubby. This in no way reflects on their REAL life. We are just having fun. No money is exchanged. I pay homage and steal from old movies, fairy tales, WOOz, Mommie Dearest,Airplane, Star Wars, Sybil, the outer limits, Jessica Rabbit, the cold war, and a pathologist I once knew at Saturday morning autopsy in Jefferson Parish. Mostly congrats to M.H. and her recent honor from the foreign press. Those aliens have great taste.

Work Text:

Ghost
by raginhoops

 

"Liz, buzz them in will you while I finish cleaning up." Dr. Rodgers was alternating squirting palmolive and hosing the oily, bloody mess off the morgue slab and chasing bits of tissue down the drain at the far end.

Donnelly leaned back as a gurney careened wildly though the double doors, Abbie and Novak clinging on for dear lives. The sheet covering THE BODY began to move and moan. The remifentenyl/ativan combo was wearing off. "Jesus, we nearly got caught in section F," Casey took over guiding the gurney to the corner.

Abbie hoisted a briefcase onto the counter, opened it, and pulled out bottles: Old Bushmill's, Grey Goose, Bombay, olives, and shaker. "Sweetcheeks, did you get the beer?"

Liz motioned to the far end of the counter at a passel of three-liter suction canisters, coronas planted like tulips in the ice. The doc took a swig from the hose. Liz cringed, " That's disgusting! I wish you wouldn't do that. Look where your hands have been."

"Don't be a nag. I had gloves on. Besides, I don't remember you worrying about where they were last night." Rodgers stared at Liz defiantly as she made short work of her ham sandwich. "Be a love and get the limes from the frig for Abbie. I'm going get the contraband." The ME adjusted her shoulder holster before she went out.

Casey piped up, "Let me, let me! I'll get `em! " It was right out of `Election', Flick on crack.

Abbie sighed, "What did I tell you about the concept of `cool'? Like this, `I`ll take care of it Liz'. " She demonstrated the correct sultry manner in which to answer. This is a show about dark shit, not `Little House on the Prairie'. Now, what will you have from the bar?""

Abbie rolled her eyes and stamped her feet when she heard `Smirnoff'. She could have at least said Stolie. "Liz, what are we to do with your girl here? She's killing the show. I can't possibly get her a decent cool quotient in just one week. Riding the bike to work,ok. Burnt orange bike shorts, no. Casey, remember the color wheel? You are autumn, not dead of winter, not halloween. You are to only wear clothes that match the wheel. While we're at it , loosen up, will ya. You need to drink more. All that clean living and healthy lifestyle stuff that you do, not good for the ratings. Athletic funky lesbian, fine/dull perky jock dyke, not sexy, not sexy one bit."

Liz called out, "How could anyone be in the opening credits and not have a drinking problem. It's unlawful. And for heaven's sake, when are you going to win a few cases? Come to think of it, when are you going to be in more than one scene in an ep?" She got out her cell phone. "Did your girlfriend let you out of your apartment dressed like that? Give me her number. Right now. Stand up straight! You do that the courtroom. Drives me batty. The slouching does not inspire confidence."

Casey cried out petulantly, "For the last time, it's not my fault. I'm just written that way!"

"Hey, honey. This is Casey's boss. That green blazer in the closet, get it out and burn it immediately."

Huang emerged from the shadows. "We've got to move on. There isn't much time and lots to accomplish if we're to save this season. We've brought her in from the cold." He opened a drawer and out climbed Alex.

"It `s colder in here than it was in there." She gingerly approached the gurney. "She's under here isn't she?"

"What's left of her, " Huang explained. "The trauma of it all: your shooting, death, departure, and your replacement Casey sent her into a fugue state. It fragmented her personality. Brace yourself. This is not your Olivia. We hope that you can shock her back to reality." With a Copperfield flourish, he flung the sheet from Golden Globe Night Olivia.

There was a collective gasp from the room. It was worse than they imagined. It's hideous, it's girly, and it's pink.

The huddled figure uncoiled and stretched. She squinted at the attentive group. "Where am I? Who are you people? Where's my husband?"

A cacophony of helpful words assailed the vision of femininity before them. They helped her up off the gurney and out of her Jimmy Choo's. They relieved her of the Harry Winston's and replaced it with a simple chain necklace and studs.

"Hey, stop this! This is kidnapping and grand larceny. It's across state lines. I can tell I'm not in LA anymore. This will be a federal offense. I know. I've memorized this dialogue before."

Abbie took a sip of her whiskey, "Liv, I am the FBI along with the shrink over there. This is a full court intervention to get our best girl back... Umm, that *is *some tasty ol' bush!"

"Hey,hey,hey,watch it! I resemble that remark, chicklet." Dr. Rodgers entered balancing a large box, third season wardrobe / BENSON emblazoned across the side. She rescued it from the dumpster behind the commissary. "Olivia, we're here to help you remember who you are. If we fail, this season's doomed."

Abbie rolled her tongue around her mouth. "This tastes gritty." She examined her empty glass. "There's some kind of powder in this glass."

Doc looked guilty as she extracted clothes from the cardboard. ** Damn, that bone dust gets into everything.**

Dark slacks were pulled up and shimmied up Olivia's legs. They simply overpowered her as she slapped at them ineffectually. "You are all making a terrible mistake. My name is Mariska. I am an actress. I have a husband who must be worried sick about me. I was at a party. I won an award. My mother was a screen goddess, forchristsake...." The rest was muffled as her dress was pulled over her head.

Huang sat nearby intoning quietly in the lotus position. "We want Olivia to come back. She is needed. You are a detective on the special victims unit. You live for your job. You are single; and, your mother was an alcoholic. You witnessed a traumatic event that fragmented your psyche and created this multiple called Mariska. We will help you deal with the pain. You must trust us. You can return to us. You will be whole again."

Abbie swaggered over and leered suggestively. "Better cover those golden globes soon or somebody's losin' an eye."

The familiar grey gap sweater slid over the rich dark brown head with the perfect highlights. She reached out to steady herself. With her next sentence, her voice was an octave lower, the shades darker. "Nothing is real. This is a dream. I need to sit down."

Huang quickly placed his watch on Olivia's wrist. "Better now?"

Surprise and relief washed through her, "Yeah, ...maybe I could use a drink." Her hands fell to her knees, subconsciously they abducted. She looked at Abbie, "Do I know you?" She started to sway and wrapped her arms tightly around herself. "Can you get me a daiquiri?"

"BLASPHEMY." Abbie cried. "No More Sissy Drinks! Don't like `em. Don't make `em. Don't believe in `em. A cosmo is as sissy as it gets here." Her face pale as a kabuki revealed true concern for the first time that night. "We're too late aren't we? It`s hopeless. She's too far gone...we're losing her." Her ranting was cut short by a slap from Rogers.

Liz offered a well-worn pair of Frye boots. I couldn't find the Doc Martens. These are mine from the 70's. Maybe...maybe they'll do?"

"I'll put them on." Alex parted the company and knelt in front of Olivia, seated and rocking, muttering incoherently. She carefully placed Olivia's right foot in the boot. It slipped in like butter. The swaying stopped. Encouraged Alex pulled the left boot on. The stammering ceased. Dark eyes grew brighter like a rheostat gliding upward.

"Alex, you're here. You're not dead." She reached for her temple and ran her fingers through her hair. "This pounding? ... What happened? Where are we? Why is my hair so long?" She surveyed the room. "You're all here. Why are we all in the morgue? Did someone die?"

Suddenly, Serena burst through the doors. "Am I too late to help?" Dick Wolf just told me that I had to get down here right now."

*Why is she here? * Slithered from one brain to the other.

Olivia continued to search everyone's face. "I was having a dream; and, you all were in it." She looked at Casey. "You wanted a brain. You wanted courage, Abbie. And, you a heart." It's obvious where her eyes rested. "And all I wanted to do was go home."

Huang said softly, "You always had the ability to come home, Olivia. May I speak to Mariska?"

"George, who the hell is Mariska?"

"Say Liv, how about a drink?"Abbie drawled happily and slapped her on her back.

Absentmindedly the recovered Olivia answered, " Yeah, that sounds good. Get me a beer."

 

END