Title: Dangerous Liasons 2 Forgiveness

by Morgana

Fandom Babylon 5

Pairing: Marcus/Naroon

Rating: NC-17

Sequel to Dangerous liaisons.

Summary: Eight months after Neroon watched Marcus become Shakiri's mate, he sees Marcus again. Nasdak finds a lost crystal containing the message in which Marcus confessed his love for Neroon. Seeing the bad state Marcus is in after living at Shakiri's home for eight months, Neroon acts on his feelings

(Warning, male pregnancy.)

Eight months later.

Nasdak thoughtfully considered the crystal in his hand and knew he had to show it to his father. Battling a guilty conscience, he entered Neroon's rooms and waited for his father to address him.

"Nasdak? Yes?" Neroon looked up from the report he had been reading and smiled at his son. Nasdak was the only thing his late wife had left him. He had gotten married early in life, before the Earth-Minbari war had come about, and his wife had served on the Ingata as well. He had mourned her death for years. Nasdak had inherited her blue eyes and reminded him of the love they had once shared.

Nasdak nervously cleared his throat; dreading the outcome of this conversation. "Eight months ago I misplaced a data crystal that contained several calls. One of them was Marcus contacting Delenn. I almost forgot that call had taken place, but then a guard discovered the crystal and... I watched it. You should watch it as well."

Neroon frowned. "And why would I want to do that?" Marcus was now Shakiri's official mate and although the sting of betrayal had somewhat softened, it still hurt. Why was Nasdak reminding him of Marcus now?

"It contains a very important message, one I never saw before. We may have acted too quickly, judging Marcus too harshly." Nasdak placed the data crystal on Neroon's desk. "Please watch it, father, or you might regret it for the rest of your life."

Nasdak's agitated tone finally registered with Neroon. "I will watch it later." He gave in, trying to reassure his son. "Is there anything else?"

"Actually, yes there is." Nasdak shuffled his feet, but met Neroon's gaze head on. "There are rumors."

"Rumors?" Neroon placed the report on his desk, unable to concentrate any longer. "What kind of rumors?"

"About Marcus and Shakiri," said Nasdak, trying to gauge Neroon's mood. His father was hard to read at times.

Neroon's expression grew unreadable. "I do not wish to hear any 'rumors'." So far he had managed to keep away from news featuring Shakiri and Marcus. His heart still hadn't healed properly.

Nasdak drew in a deep breath. "Uyi, the leader of the Moon Shields, visited Shakiri two weeks ago and she caught a glance of Marcus..." Neroon glared at him, but he continued nonetheless. His father couldn't intimidate him. Neroon tried to appear authoritative and controlling, but he had never met a gentler man, even though Neroon seldom showed that quality in public. "She told me that Marcus appeared ill. His face was badly bruised, he was limping... and he was pregnant with Shakiri's child."

Neroon jumped to his feet. "What?" He knew that Shakiri's wife had died before she could bear him any children, but this news stunned him. "Pregnant?"

"Marcus is the only one who can carry his child. Marcus is Shakiri's official mate and although Shakiri hates Marcus, he needs the Ranger."

"Hates him?" Neroon turned away from Nasdak, not wanting his son to see his emotional turmoil.

"One of the guards told Uyi that Marcus was repeatedly beaten and exposed to verbal and emotional abuse. It seems that the only reason that Shakiri keeps Marcus alive is the promise of offspring. Shakiri wants a son to follow in his footsteps."

Shocked, Neroon shook his head. "This is Delenn's fault. This does not concern me. Marcus played me, he might be playing Shakiri as well."

Nasdak bowed his head. "Watch the data crystal, father. Just do it." He quietly left the room, knowing Neroon was waging an inner battle.

Neroon's eyes came to rest on the crystal. Nasdak had sounded extremely concerned and sincere. Maybe he should watch the crystal. He had no idea what was on it, but it had clearly shaken Nasdak.

After placing the data crystal in the player, he searched the index, accessing Marcus' message. His heart missed a beat, finding Marcus staring back at him. He had forgotten how gorgeous those green eyes were and how they deepened to the darkest blue just before climaxing. Pushing back those thoughts, he focused on Marcus' words.

"Alit Neroon treats me very well. He's the perfect host," said Marcus, looking very pleased.

Neroon only heard Delenn's voice, as he didn't have a visual of her.

"That pleases me. Don't wait too long to contact me again, Marcus..." said Delenn, pleased.

So far Neroon had no idea why Nasdak felt it was important he watched this. He expected the conversation to come to an end, as Delenn was saying goodbye and he almost removed the crystal from the player, when Marcus' voice sounded again.

"Delenn?" said Marcus, "Something unexpected happened."

Neroon's heart suddenly leapt in anticipation. What unexpected thing had happened? And why did Marcus feel it was important enough to mention it to Delenn, knowing he wasn't on a secure line?

"Marcus?" Delenn sounded confused.

Although he didn't know why, Neroon held his breath. The expression in Marcus' eyes had turned gentle and caring.

"I'm in love with Neroon," said Marcus. "It started subtlety and at first I didn't realize it was happening. If you hadn't ordered me to seduce him I would have done so anyway. He's a gentle and kind man and he even gave me this."

Hearing those words shattered the little calm Neroon had left. Marcus was telling Delenn that he was in love with him! Marcus had been in love with him! Yes, he admitted to Delenn’s order to seduce him, but he had already known that. A gentle and kind man? And he is in love with me? Valen... Neroon's hands grew into fists, seeing Marcus uncover the necklace, which had symbolized Marcus' importance in his life.

"You put yourself in danger by admitting this," said Delenn, "You know Neroon monitors all calls."

Oh, yes, he did monitor all calls, but this one had slipped by! The most important message of all had never reached him! Why had they misplaced this particular data crystal?

"I know that. I'm fully aware of the risks I'm taking, but I can't lie anymore," said Marcus, "I'll tell him tomorrow."

Neroon flinched, hearing those words. This message had been recorded two days before he had found out about Marcus' 'assignment'. Why hadn't Marcus told him then? Why wait? Looking at Marcus on screen, the Ranger seemed determined to tell him the truth. What had happened? He thought back to those days when Marcus and he had still been together. There was this one night when he said he wanted to talk to me... I was annoyed and silenced him with a bruising kiss... It never came up again...

"Marcus, he won't easily forgive you." Delenn's voice trembled.

How right you are. I cannot forgive him, even if this is true... He came here with the intent to seduce me, use me.

"I deserve his anger, but I can't manipulate him any longer," said Marcus. "That never worked. Delenn? I think I have found the other half of my soul. We fit... perfectly."

Guilt began to claw at Neroon. The other half of your soul? Fit perfectly? Valen, what have I done? Why did I not give him those five minutes he asked for? Maybe things would have developed differently had I known how he really felt about me.

"I am very happy for you, Marcus," said Delenn, "Let me know how Neroon reacts when he finds out?"

"I will. Thank you, Delenn."

Neroon stared at the now black screen. Marcus had revealed his love for him to Delenn, knowing damn well that he was being monitored. It had been dangerous for Marcus to make this admission, Neroon could have called him on it, but the crystal had been lost... until now.

Valen, what do I do? What if he told Delenn the truth? What if he really fell in love with me? Should I have given him those five minutes? Was cutting him out of my life the right decision? It drove him into Shakiri's arms... Neroon sighed deeply. And Nasdak told me about these 'rumors' going around, stating that Shakiri is abusive toward Marcus... Knowing Shakiri, it is the true. His wife died under suspicious circumstances. Can I stay here and pretend I never watched that crystal? Or do I leave for Yedor and see for myself if those rumors are true? If Uyi was allowed to see Marcus, Shakiri will allow me that same privilege; he does not know Marcus was my lover once.

Restlessly, Neroon got to his feet and paced his rooms. His conscience wouldn't allow him to block out the message and the rumors, and he cringed, realizing he would go to Yedor to check on these rumors. But what was he going to do if they were true? Could he turn his back on Marcus, knowing the Ranger thought of him as the other half of his soul? Nasdak said Marcus is carrying Shakiri's child. I would not be surprised to learn that he plans on keeping Marcus alive until his child has been born and then lets him wither away.

He accessed the comm system and contacted Nasdak. His son didn't seem surprised to hear from him. "Contact Shakiri. I want to talk to him, personally."

"Are you traveling to Yedor?"

"Yes, tell Shakiri I want to discuss clan matters with him. He does not need to know my real reason for visiting him." His hands shook and he clasped them behind his back, hiding his vulnerability as his guilt deepened.

"And the real reason is...?" Nasdak had a very good idea why Neroon suddenly wanted to talk to Shakiri.

"Marcus of course..." His son had made him say it! "I watched the crystal and..."

"You believe him."

"Maybe I do," admitted Neroon. "I have to talk to him and ask Marcus if he was being truthful."

"And you want to check on the rumors as well. Do not look at me like that. I know you, father. You cannot bear the thought of Marcus being subjected to such humiliation and abuse. I feel guilty myself. May I accompany you?"

Neroon considered the request. "Yes, you may. Now contact Shakiri, mask your feelings and hide our intensions well." He terminated the contact and walked over to his desk, opened a drawer and uncovered the necklace he had given Marcus. He had always kept it close...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Neroon managed to conceal his unease as Shakiri welcomed him to his home. Trying to act casually, he took in the other man's appearance. Shakiri hadn't changed since their last meeting and Neroon deemed Shakiri perfectly capable of tormenting Marcus on purpose. The tricky part was to get Shakiri's permission to see Marcus. If he didn't get it, Nasdak and he would find a way to gain access to Marcus' quarters, even if that meant misleading people. "Shakiri, it has been too long since we talked about clan matters." He had to keep it formal as he didn't want Shakiri to grow suspicious.

"Neroon, it is true. We lost touch during these last few months. I was very pleased when your son contacted me and informed me of your visit."

Shakiri gestured him to sit down and Neroon seated himself in a comfortable chair in front of Shakiri's desk. "Tell me, what has happened since we last met eight months ago..." He paused just long enough to appear spontaneous when asking his next question. "How is your mate? The Ranger? Do you not yet regret your decision? I could not imagine having a human, an inferior human, as a mate..."

Shakiri sighed. "He is a burden. He never learned to obey orders. One would think that Rangers would excel at carrying out instructions. I had to teach him obedience."

"I heard he is also carrying your child?" Neroon's anger increased, hearing that Shakiri 'had to teach him obedience'. That was probably the reason why Marcus had been covered in bruises during Uyi's visit. He hoped that his words would reassure Shakiri that he shared the other man's views on humans.

"I did not have a choice in the matter!" Shakiri banged his fist into the desk. "It is humiliating to know that a human is carrying my child, but once my son is born I plan to dispose of the human."

Neroon thanked Valen that he had followed his instincts by coming here. "You will have him killed?"

"I will not need to actively end his life," hinted Shakiri. "The pregnancy has worn him down. I doubt he will live much longer after the child is born."

I have to act quickly! Time might be running out for Marcus! "He must be a truly pathetic sight," said Neroon, "A pity that he is not here." He demonstratively looked about.

"You may visit him." Shakiri leaned back in his chair. "You want to gloat? I do so regularly. He is staying at the old wing, where my wife used to live."

Neroon bowed his head and smirked, trying to convince Shakiri that he was merely visiting Marcus in order to gloat at the Ranger's misery. "I am honored..."

Shakiri laughed. "And now let us eat and drink! Will Nasdak join us today?"

"He is taking care of some personal matters, but he will join us for dinner." Privately Neroon couldn't wait to leave these quarters and see for himself what kind of state Marcus was in. What would he do if Marcus really was in such a bad way? Marcus was Shakiri's official mate and there was only one way to do away with the threat the caste leader posed; challenge Shakiri to Denn'Sha, end his life, and then take Shakiri's place as caste leader. He would automatically 'inherit' Shakiri's mate. And Shakiri's child! Neroon didn't know what to do about that little complication... Not yet anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I have Shakiri's permission to see Marcus." Neroon entered his temporary quarters, which he shared with Nasdak. Looking at his son, he caught Nasdak's dark expression. "What upset you?"

Nasdak nearly hissed his answer. "I spoke to one of the guards. They keep Marcus in a drugged state so he does not bother them. It is very likely that he won't even recognize us when we visit him in his rooms."

"They keep him sedated?" Neroon frowned. "We need to act now. We no longer have the luxury of waiting for the right opportunity to come along. We will leave now."

Nasdak nodded once, completely agreeing with his father. "I know where we can find him. The guard I talked to, Kaleen, will even leave us alone with Marcus for a few minutes. But we must be careful; another guard named Sallis is personally responsible for Marcus and we cannot let him grow suspicious."

"Should they find out our real motives for coming here we will find ourselves in problems," agreed Neroon, "That is why we have to act now."

Not wasting any more time, he headed for the doorway. Nasdak followed him and together they left for Marcus' rooms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Neroon couldn't remember a time when he had been this nervous! After watching the crystal, he had started to regret not giving Marcus a chance to explain his actions. That guilt ate at him and it even affected Nasdak. He had seldom seen his son this distraught; Nasdak probably blamed himself for judging Marcus too quickly and keeping the Ranger away from him. But feeling guilty wouldn't get them anywhere!

"We’ve arrived," said Nasdak. "I will get Kaleen and make sure it is safe for us to continue."

Neroon let his son scout ahead, too busy dealing with his own feelings. He had to get a hold on them. If Marcus was really in such a poor state, he had to get the Ranger into safety.

"Father, Sallis is not here. We can proceed."

An elderly warrior greeted them. "Alit Neroon, my name is Kaleen. Do not stay too long. Sallis is due to return in a few moments."

"I understand," said Neroon. "We will keep this visit short." His heart pounded, stepping into the spartanly furnished rooms.

"Valen..." He swallowed hard and his face contorted, seeing the helpless Ranger strapped to the platform. "I barely recognize him."

Marcus' hair had grown long, but his beard and moustache had been removed. The bruising was only now starting to fade and the handsome face looked ghostly white. The Ranger was hooked up two IV's and one feeding tube. He lay motionless and Neroon had to strain to see Marcus' chest rise and fall. His eyes nearly popped from their sockets, seeing Marcus' growing belly. It was true then; Marcus was carrying Shakiri's child, a son, accordingly to the caste leader. All weight seemed concentrated around his belly, like the child was sucking the life out of him. "He looks..." Words failed him.

"I know what you are trying to say. The words elude me too." Nasdak stepped back, letting his father walk over to the platform.

Neroon studied the Ranger closely. "He is dying... It is only a matter of weeks, maybe even days." He was at a loss for words to describe the feelings coursing through him. Was this his doing? Had he driven Marcus into Shakiri's arms? "Does he really love me?"

"I cannot answer that question," said Nasdak, "but I do think he cares about you. If his words on the crystal are true, he loves you."

"Nasdak, we have to do something. I cannot let this continue. If I do not stop Shakiri, Marcus will be dead within the month."

"What are your plans? Shakiri is caste leader and Marcus his mate. Are your hands not bound?" Nasdak managed to hide his fear that the Ranger might die before they had a chance to think of a plan. "Marcus does not have much time left and I doubt Shakiri will listen to reason."

Slowly, almost hesitantly, Neroon raised a hand and placed its palm on Marcus' brow. He hissed, surprised how cold Marcus was. "Is there not some kind of blanket?"

"Father, we cannot help him. Sallis would wonder about the blanket." Nasdak hated pointing this out to his father. "How do you want to proceed from here?"

Neroon was surprised to find that he actually liked the cleanly shaven face better than all that facial hair. Although Marcus looked even younger, his jaw line was more pronounced now, emphasizing his strong features. "How do I want to proceed from here?" Tonight was a formal dinner, which all five clan leaders were attending. He would make his move then. If Shakiri didn't agree to treat Marcus respectfully, he would challenge the caste leader to Denn'Sha. He would instruct Nasdak later on what to do should he die during the challenge.

"Father, we had better go now. Sallis will be back any moment now and we cannot allow him to find us here." Neroon's emotions were all over his face. Sallis would realize the truth at once.

"You are right," said Neroon. "We will leave now and act later." He waited for Nasdak to leave the room and then gently stroked Marcus' icy brow. "I failed you once, I refuse to fail you again. I will take you home with me or die trying..." After making his promise to a strongly sedated Marcus, he turned around and followed Nasdak back to their quarters.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Neroon was still brooding when he joined Shakiri and the other clan leaders for dinner. He would make his move tonight. He had instructed Nasdak of his wishes should he die during the challenge. Looking about, he tried to gauge the clan leaders' mood. Would they back him up or support Shakiri?

Uyi, the leader of the Moon Shields was probably on his side. She had expressed her concern about the way Shakiri was treating his new mate and she had been the one who had talked to Nasdak, informing him of Marcus' bruises. His gaze traveled to Barin, the leader of the Night Walkers. The elderly Minbari warrior was an excellent tactician and would probably agree with Neroon's views. But what about Zoun, the lead of the Fire Wings? Shakiri and Zoun had been friends for most of their lives. He needed at least three of them to back him up! Weyr, the leader of the Wind Swords, didn't really get along with his clansman Shakiri, but Neroon doubted Weyr would favor him over his own clansman. Did he have a choice? No.

Nasdak had taken up position at Marcus' quarters and had taken Neroon's personal guards with him. If everything went according to plan, Nasdak would free Marcus and take the Ranger to their home, getting him away from Shakiri. Now he had to make his first move. "I visited your mate," said Neroon. "He was in a poor state." Trying to read the expressions on the clan leaders' faces, he definitely noticed Uyi's approval of him bringing up the matter.

Shakiri froze. Neroon's remark obviously puzzled him. "A poor state?"

Neroon's eyes grew hard, unyielding. "Keeping him sedated is not acceptable. You are not treating him according to custom. What do you think will happen when the Rangers learn of the way you are mistreating him?"

"He did not tell them," said Uyi. "No one is allowed to contact the human." She nodded her head once. "I agree with Neroon. This will destroy the treaty we so carefully built."

Zoun remained silent, watching Neroon, but Weyr's angry voice echoed through the old hall. "Our clan is displeased as well. Your behavior is dishonorable."

Neroon grinned privately. He hadn't counted on them to openly agree with him! Zoun didn't look too happy and Barin was still analyzing this new situation. "This cannot continue," said Neroon. "You need to make some changes after your son is born."

Shakiri pushed his plate away from him. "My healers assured me he won't survive the birth."

The healers had to perform surgery on Marcus to deliver the baby and in case of danger, they would do anything to save the child's life, even if it cost Marcus' life. Valen, if I do not act now Marcus will be dead within the month! Neroon made eye-contact with Uyi and Weyr, surprised that the Wind Sword was agreeing with him. He once more addressed Shakiri.

"You do realize that the Rangers will break the contact, proclaiming you did not honor it and they would be speaking the truth. Our people need this truce, their support. The Rangers strengthen our defenses, protect our people from the Raiders. Do you want to risk it all because you cannot stand the human's presence? Honoring the contract is in the best interest of our people."

Shakiri got to his feet, trying to look regal and in command. "Are you questioning my ability to lead the caste, Neroon?"

The tension in the room was palpable. Neroon met Uyi's eyes and she closed them once, so did Weyr and Barin. The clan leaders backed him up. Zoun decided to stay neutral, not getting involved in the conflict. Neroon pushed back his chair and got to his feet, uncovering his pike. There was only one way to claim caste leadership, by battle. "As is custom within our caste, I challenge you to Denn'Sha. The Warrior Caste needs proper leadership. We cannot afford to lose this alliance because of your hate for humans."

Shakiri exchanged a look with his personal guards. Now that the challenge had been spoken, they were no longer allowed to interfere. He had to fight Neroon himself. "I am not giving up my position." Shakiri uncovered his pike as well and extended it.

"To the death..."

"I would rather not kill you," said Neroon, "Minbari do not kill Minbari, but I will respect your wish. To the death." He had four witnesses who had heard Shakiri's demand. Opening his pike as well, he moved away from the dinner table to create some distance between him and Shakiri. Reaching inside his pocket, he pressed a button, giving Nasdak a sign to move in and secure the Ranger.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nasdak signaled his men to move down the corridors and climb the stairs. Their plan was fairly simple; disarm and disable Shakiri's men and then take Marcus to Neroon's personal flyer where a healer was waiting to take care of him. Once Neroon had joined them, they would leave for home. And if Neroon does not join us, I will honor my father's wishes and look after Marcus myself.

His men moved in. Nasdak immediately noticed that several of Shakiri's guards were putting up a fight, trying to keep them from reaching Marcus. Sallis fought ruthlessly, injuring two of his men. Nasdak moved at once, fighting Sallis himself. "Gahen, secure Marcus!" His second in command reacted at once and headed for the platform. The fighting continued. Shakiri's guards refused to back down and Nasdak watched Gahen carry Marcus to the doorway. The Ranger was sedated, unconscious and couldn't take care of himself. "Gahen! Leave!"

"Nasdak, look out!" Gahen warned him, but Nasdak didn't see the blow coming.

Sallis' pike impacted against his back, catapulting him toward Gahen and Marcus. Eyes widening, he realized he was going to crash in to them. Horrified, he stared at Marcus as the impact knocked the Ranger from Gahen's protective hold, causing him to tumble down the long stair case.

"Valen, help him!" Shocked, Nasdak stared at Marcus' lips, which were turning red; blood dripped onto the robes he was wearing. "Deal with Sallis," said Nasdak, instructing his men, "And get a healer in here!" They couldn't move Marcus until they knew the extent of his injuries. But his insides contracted, fearing the worst. Marcus was bleeding internally and in danger of suffering a miscarriage.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The clan leaders had risen from their seats, monitoring the duel closely. Neroon felt their eyes in his back and straightened his shoulders. He had to win this challenge; losing meant certain death for him and Marcus. Launching a classic attack, he aimed at Shakiri's feet, trying to catch his opponent off balance. But Shakiri realized his tactic and moved away. Neroon chased Shakiri through the room, occasionally managing to land a blow on the other man's head. "Surrender!"

"Never!" Shakiri now attacked himself, and landed a forceful blow against Neroon's right temple. A victorious grin appeared on his face, tasting victory.

Neroon gathered his strength, and recalled the evasive moves Marcus had shown him during the Ranger's stay at his home. Executing them, he saw Shakiri's surprise. Mimicking Marcus' tactic, he managed to disarm Shakiri. The other man's pike flew through the air and hit the floor with a loud thud. "Surrender!" Neroon quickly moved into position, swept Shakiri's feet away from beneath him and aimed the butt end of his pike at his fallen opponent. Rage burned in Shakiri's dark eyes; Neroon nodded his head. "You lost, renounce your position."

"No, never!" Acting out of pure desperation, Shakiri lunched forward, grabbing Neroon's legs.

Cursing Shakiri's action, Neroon lost balance and he tried to support himself by leaning on his pike, but the pike moved and slipped.

Shakiri's roar cut through the old hall. "No!"

Stunned, Neroon stared at Shakiri's chest. His pike had buried itself in the other man's flesh, penetrating Shakiri's heart. "Valen, taking your life never was my intention." He had known one of them could die, but he hadn't set out to kill Shakiri cold-heartedly.

Uyi and Barin moved toward them. Uyi knelt beside Shakiri, holding his stare will the dying man released his last breath. The injury was too severe and help was already too late.

Neroon sought out Shakiri's eyes. "It was an accident."

Shakiri was no longer able to reply; his fists released its tension and they opened, palm upward. Shakiri, caste leader, was no more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nasdak ignored Sallis and let his men deal with Shakiri's guards. Followed by Gahen, he descended the stairs. Kneeling by Marcus' form, he glared at Gahen. "Marcus needs a healer! Get one!" Once they knew how badly Marcus was injured, they might be able to transport the Ranger. Should he sent Neroon a message? No, not yet. His father was probably still fighting Shakiri. He didn't know if the other clan leaders supported his father. If they didn't, they would apprehend Neroon and take him to the High Court. My father entrusted Marcus to me, I cannot fail them now.

He cradled Marcus' head in his lap, gently stroking the long locks. I regret acting too quickly and I will try to make up for my past mistakes.

"Nasdak, I found a healer!" Gahen ran down the corridor, dragging a young healer behind him. "This is Jalai, a healer."

Nasdak grabbed Jalai and pulled him down. "Examine him, and if he is fit for transport take him to the medical facility."

Jalai, who had been surprised when Nasdak had grabbed him, now realized why they needed him. He had heard rumors of the human Ranger, but hadn't been part of the elite group of healers whom Shakiri had entrusted with Marcus' pregnancy. Jalai sucked in his breath as his hands examined Marcus' abdomen. "I can no longer feel the child move about. The fall might have killed the fetus. Whether he is fit for transport or not is no longer important. The child has died and if we do not act quickly, the Ranger will die as well."

Nasdak and Gahen gently pulled Marcus to his feet and together they carried the Ranger to the medical facility, following Jalai and hoping they still had a chance to save Marcus' life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Neroon looked up from Shakiri's corpse and met Barin's eyes. The old Minbari was well revered and his reaction would determine if the others continued to support him or not. "Barin, I do not wish to be caste leader, I merely wanted Shakiri to treat his mate respectfully."

"But our caste is now without a leader," said Barin. "The four of us will confer and we will let you know if you are acceptable as new caste leader. If not, one of us will take Shakiri's place."

Neroon nodded once. "I understand, Barin, and I will accept your decision."

"Leave us now. We will also tend to Shakiri's body." Uyi tried to sound reassuring.

Neroon headed for the doorway, wondering about his feelings. Right now, he felt empty, but then Nasdak appeared, running toward him. His instincts kicked in and he realized something was terribly wrong. "Nasdak!"

"It is Marcus, father. During our rescue attempt he fell down the stairs and... The healer thinks that the fall killed the child. They are now operating on Marcus, trying to save his life."

"Where is he?" The shock was too big and too unexpected to register properly. Neroon acted on automatic pilot; his feelings still had to kick in again.

"In the medical facility. He was not stable enough to transport to our home."

"Take me to him. I need to see him now." Neroon followed his son; setting aside the way he felt about Shakiri's death. The other man had deserved to be punished for treating Marcus like that, but Minbari did not kill Minbari! Now the hand of fate had guided his pike, ending Shakiri's life. Pushing back all thoughts about the now existing void in leadership, he rushed through the corridors, desperate to find out if Marcus was going to live.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why are they not working on him?" Surprised, Neroon noticed the large group of healers who stood in the waiting area. "Nasdak, find out what is going on."

Neroon resolutely marched toward the operating theatre and glanced inside through a window. His own trusted healer, Valorum, was working on Marcus, assisted by a young healer who he didn't know. Unwilling to disturb them, he watched silently from behind the glass. Marcus' abdomen had been opened and he cringed, seeing the amount of blood Marcus was losing.

"What did you find out?" Neroon looked at his son, when Nasdak joined him, and he immediately noticed the cold rage in his eyes.

"They refuse to help him because Shakiri told them to save the child at any cost. They believe the child could have been saved, but that Valorum and Jalai sacrificed the child to save Marcus' life."

Neroon frowned. "You told me the child had died."

"Accoring to Jalai and Valorum the child is dead, but Shakiri's healers fear his wrath."

"Shakiri is dead," said Neroon, informing his son. "He died during Denn'Sha and the other clan leaders are now choosing a new caste leader. Marcus is safe now and he has to survive! I cannot believe they are willing to let him die!"

"He is human, father," said Nasdak softly. "They do not care whether he lives or dies now that he suffered a miscarriage."

"And they call themselves healers?" snarled Neroon. "Healers? If it were not for Valorum and this young healer Marcus would be dead by now!"

"His name is Jalai. He does not seem prejudiced and is more than willing to assist Valorum," said Nasdak. "Jalai also told me that Marcus won't be well enough for transport for some time."

"Then we must stay longer." Neroon nervously licked his lips. Valorum was closing the wound; surgery was almost over. "Go to Uyi and explain Marcus' condition to her."

Nasdak nodded once and then turned about to leave, but he didn't. "Father? Any word on Marcus yet?"

"No, but here comes Valorum." Neroon watched the healer's face closely and read worry in Valorum's eyes. "How bad is he?" Valorum sighed. "Bad. We removed the fetus. Jalai was right; the child did not survive the fall. Marcus was bleeding internally and he suffered a ruptured spleen, which we removed. In addition, he suffered two bruised ribs and a bruised wrist. We feared he had also suffered a concussion, but we did not find any evidence to support that theory. He is stable now, but I suggest you wait another twelve hours before moving him."

"That is merely his physical state," said Neroon, worried. "What about his mental state?"

"I cannot answer that question, Alit." Valorum moved a little closer to his old friend. "He lost a child. We are men, we are not meant to carry new life inside us. I do not know how he will react when he finds out the truth. He should be monitored closely, twenty-four hours a day. We cannot take any risks."

"And once he recovered sufficiently, I will take him to my home." Marcus would feel more at home there, where the memory of Shakiri didn't haunt the Ranger. "I will return shortly. Take good care of him." Valorum nodded and Neroon signaled Nasdak to wait. Now that his son knew Marcus would survive, the young Minbari was on his way to see Uyi. "Wait for me. I will join you. I need to talk to Uyi and Barin."

Nasdak waited for his father to join him and together they made their way to the conference rooms where the clan leaders were deciding who would be the next caste leader.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Neroon, Nasdak, please join us." Uyi smiled and gestured them to step inside.

Nasdak stayed one step behind his father and followed Neroon inside. They came to a halt in front of the four clan leaders.

Neroon quickly scanned their faces, trying to gauge their mood. "Marcus was injured and is currently in the medical facility. Shakiri's healers refuse to treat him, so I called on my personal physician Valorum and he operated on the Ranger. Marcus is stable now, but needs rest." He didn't know if they cared about Marcus' well-being, but he wanted them to know how close the Ranger had come to dying.

"We regret that he lost the child. Children are sacred to us now that the number of Minbari is declining, but we are relieved to hear that the Ranger is recovering."

The fact that Barin was taking control didn't surprise Neroon. He reckoned the old tactician had assumed temporary leadership and Barin would decide his fate. "I ordered Valorum to inform me should the Ranger's condition deteriorate."

Barin nodded once. "We made our decision."

Neroon tensed; unable to read Barin's facial expression. "When I told you that I did not desire leading the Warrior Caste I was being truthful. When I traveled to Babylon 5 to stop Delenn from becoming Ranger One, I learned a valuable lesson. I thought Delenn was a religious zealot, but it was I who was obsessed. I no longer have the ambition or the desire to attain such a powerful position." He was content being the leader of the Star Riders. Uyi would make the best caste leader; she was compassionate and wise and the clans would accept her without objection.

An approving smile appeared on Barin's face. "And that is exactly why we chose you to succeed Shakiri."

Barin's revelation stunned Neroon and he quickly exchanged a glance with Nasdak. "What?"

"You will succeed Shakiri. You challenged and defeated him," said Barin. "You granted him his life and had it not been for that most unfortunate accident Shakiri would still be alive. You do not wish to be caste leader; you let go of that ambition. You are the right man to lead the caste." Barin rose to his feet, supporting his old bones by leaning against the wall. "We will inform our clansmen of Shakiri's passing and that you will take his place. I advise you to stay here; we will need to confer with you. We also looked at the contract that binds the Warrior Caste and the Rangers."

Neroon saw the sudden gleam in Barin's eyes and grew cautious.

"Marcus was Shakiri's mate because Shakiri was caste leader. Now that you are taking his place, Marcus will be your official mate." Barin nodded his head once. "You seem to care about his well-being and you will treat him according to custom. We will officially proclaim you new caste leader in twenty-four hours. Until then, I suggest you ponder this new development. You are restricted in your movements until the proclamation; do not leave this residence. The caste needs to know it can count on its new leader."

Neroon was shocked; he didn't want this promotion! He hadn't helped Marcus for personal gain! He had helped the Ranger because he cared for him and now Marcus was his official mate. He grew enraged. This contract was a monstrosity!

"I want to view the contract." He would contact Delenn later and tell her what he thought of her manipulations! It was unheard of that Marcus was handed to the next caste leader because a contract stated so. But in this case, he could use the contract's stipulations to his advantage; they allowed him to take care of Marcus, to be near him. Looking Barin in the eyes, Neroon tried to remain calm. "I accept your decision, but do not think it is wise."

"Who would be more suited as caste leader?" asked Weyr curiously. "Name one."

"Uyi," said Neroon, "she would lead the caste wisely."

Uyi smiled and shook her head. "My place is with my clan. Neroon, I am growing old, I witnessed your birth and in time I realized your leadership potential. Do not underestimate your abilities. You are more capable of leading the caste than I ever was. Accept your rightful place. You acted honorably when you challenged Shakiri, you fought him well and you earned the right to be the new caste leader. You could do so much good for our people. Do not throw this opportunity to the wind."

Neroon gave up now that they were teaming up against him. "I will do my best."

"Good," said Barin. "You may leave now. I am sure you have personal matters to attend to and you might want to consider visiting the Ranger; it would strengthen the bond between the Rangers and our caste."

Neroon bowed his head and so did Nasdak. The two Minbari left the hall and stared at each other. Nasdak didn't know what to say. Congratulating his father didn't seem right as Neroon appeared displeased. "What will you do now, father?"

"Accept," sighed Neroon. "I cannot allow another to take the place of caste leader and take Marcus as his new mate. Marcus and I have unfinished business."

Nasdak grinned. "Not to mention that you love him..."

Neroon glared at his son.

"And he loves you back, remember?"

"I wish I could be completely sure," revealed Neroon, "but the seeds of doubt are still inside my soul. What if that call to Delenn was a mere tactic, and he counted on me to listen in and admire his 'honesty', which would conveniently convince me that he truly loved me."

Nasdak shook his head in disbelief. "I sometimes think you spent too much time talking to Shakiri and the other clan leaders. Did you become paranoid? Marcus sounded sincere when I listened to his message and he tried to talk to you when we found him out. He seemed driven to explain everything to you. Delenn might have ordered him to seduce you, but I believe that his feelings deepened during those weeks."

Neroon cocked his head. "I wish I could believe that."

"You should talk to Marcus and find out." Nasdak started walking toward the medical facility, knowing his father would eventually follow. "Talk to him."

Neroon felt tempted to follow Nasdak's advice, but still felt hesitant. He didn't want to be manipulated again, but talking to Marcus would do little harm so he gave in. Nasdak stayed in the corridor and Neroon stepped into the exam room in which Marcus was asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Valorum? Can I sit with him?" Neroon's tone was soft and gentle, mindful of the fact that Marcus needed his sleep.

"Yes, you may, but do not try to wake him. I had to administer him certain meds to take away his pain. Wake him up now and they lose their effectiveness. Let him heal in his sleep."

"I have no intention of waking him," said Neroon. "I merely wish to sit with him and watch Marcus."

"That is acceptable." Valorum adjusted the two IV's Marcus was hooked up to and injected fluids, which the Ranger badly needed. "He is malnourished."

"That surprises me." Neroon frowned. "I thought Shakiri wanted his child to live."

"The child was well taken care of. The feeding tube took care of that, but most nutrients strengthened the child and not Marcus."

Neroon pulled up a chair and sat down. Marcus' face was only a few inches away and he caught the trembling of the Ranger's eyelids. "Is he waking up? Did I speak too loudly?"

"He is fighting his way back to consciousness," said Valorum, "But you are not to blame for him waking up. He has been having nightmares since he arrived. He even called out your name several times."

Surprised, Neroon studied the Ranger. "My name?"

"Yes, he was pleading with you. I was not able to make any sense of his ramblings, because Shakiri haunts his dreams as well and then he starts raving."

"Is there anything I can do?" Neroon raised his right hand and rested its palm on Marcus' brow, staying clear of the fading bruises.

"Your presence seems to soothe him," observed Valorum. "Stay, talk to him, maybe the sound of your voice will ensure a peaceful sleep."

Neroon nodded his head and Valorum left the room, giving them some privacy. Neroon inclined his head and closely studied the pale face. Yes, he liked the beardless face, but he would gladly have Marcus with the facial hair as well. Both had their charms. "Marcus? I am sorry I never gave you those five minutes. If I had listened to my heart instead of my head I would have talked to you. I let my pride get in the way. You were not acting, were you? Do you love me? For I love you..."

Marcus stirred and Neroon privately cursed talking aloud. "I am sorry, you should be resting." But the doubts never left him. Did Marcus really love him? Stroking the sweaty brow, he recalled the first time they had made love. Back then, Marcus had told him that he had never had a male lover before, but the Ranger had accepted him.

"Ne...roon?" Marcus stirred again, shifted in the bed and released a pain-filled moan.

"Yes, I am here." Neroon leaned in closer and checked the latest readings. Marcus was still asleep, maybe even dreaming, but the Ranger had no idea he was really here. "You are safe now. I am here with you and I will keep you safe."

A weak smile settled on Marcus' features. "Ne...roon..." His eyes remained closed and his deep and regular breathing confirmed that he was still asleep.

Neroon's throat constricted. "Marcus, I regret the fact that Shakiri..." Marcus began to trash at the mention of that name and Neroon acted quickly, afraid the Ranger might pull out the IV's. "Marcus, it is I, Neroon. You are safe, believe me, you are safe." As he stroked the now burning brow, Marcus calmed down. Valorum appeared in the doorway and ran a quick check on the Ranger.

Neroon used that time to mumble reassurances. "I will keep you safe, Marcus. I will give you a chance to explain yourself. I won't turn my back on you again." He held his breath as Marcus' eyes flashed open. The amount of hurt and anguish in them made him cringe. What had Marcus been subjected to these last eight months?

"I will give him something to make sure he goes back to sleep," said Valorum. "Continue to talk to him, Neroon."

Marcus' green eyes kept him prisoner and Neroon swallowed hard. He wasn't even sure if Marcus was coherent or not. Was the Ranger awake enough to understand him? "Marcus, you are safe, you are with me now." He desperately searched for other ways to reassure Marcus, but didn't find any. "You are safe."

"Ne...roon?" Marcus blinked and the sedative began to move through his blood stream. "Nice... dream..."

"It is not a dream," said Neroon firmly. "I am here with you." Eventually, he gently took hold of Marcus' right hand, the one without the IV's, and rubbed the hot skin. Marcus had developed a fever, which was not a good sign, considering his weakened state. "This is real."

Marcus' smile suddenly faded and his breathing quickened. He tried to push himself into an upright position, but failed as his strength had deserted him. "I need... need to tell... tell you..."

"Marcus, you need rest." Neroon did his best to calm the injured Ranger. "We can talk later, once you are feeling better."

"No... no! This is my only chance! I... I...I love... love you! I really... do. Love... love you... I love...you..." Making this admission sapped the last of his strength and his eyes closed, succumbing to unconsciousness.

Neroon's eyes swam with unshed tears, hearing Marcus' words. Any doubts he might have had were gone now. Marcus was in no shape to lie, to pretend. The Ranger hadn't counted on ever seeing him again and that explained his pleading tone. "Valen may help me, but I believe you." Bowing forward, he placed a single, chaste kiss on Marcus' brow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nasdak, who had been watching from behind the window, smiled.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Neroon spent the next twenty-four hours alternating between his quarters and the medical facility. Now that the clan leaders had made their decision, he had to prepare for the ceremony. Whenever he got too edgy, he left to see Marcus and sit with him. Valorum had shown him the incision on the Ranger's abdomen, the bruised ribs and wrist and had talked to him to reassure him. Physically, Marcus would heal, but what about the Ranger's emotional state?

"Neroon," said Valorum, "do you wish to see the dead fetus?"

Caught by surprise, Neroon stared at Marcus. "I do not know..."

"Shakiri's healers will take the child away at sunset and maybe Marcus will want to know what his son looked like. If you do not look at the child you won't be able to tell him."

Neroon left his chair and joined Valorum. "Let us get this over with." He followed the healer to a secluded room at the back of the medical facility. Two of Shakiri's healers were already embalming the dead body. They stepped aside to let him pass and Neroon's glance hardened, looking at the little corpse. There was no sign that Shakiri had allowed the Ranger's DNA to affect the child's appearance. The dead child was a copy of Shakiri. "I have seen enough."

Valorum nodded once and guided Neroon back into the corridor. "According to the contract Marcus has no rights to decide what will happen with the body so Shakiri's healers stepped in."

"They can have the child," spat Neroon. "Shakiri only used his own DNA when creating it. There is nothing of Marcus in there. I want to sit with the Ranger a little longer."

"Of course, Neroon." Valorum watched Neroon head for Marcus' room and rubbed his brow. Neroon was too concerned for Marcus' well-being. Could it be the rumor that Neroon was in love with Marcus was true?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Father, they are expecting you. The ceremony is about to take place." Nasdak joined his father at Marcus' bedside. "I can sit with him while you are gone." Then he would miss the ceremony, but he knew how much Marcus meant to his father.

"Thank you, my son. Sit with him until I return." Neroon got to his feet and straightened out his uniform. "The ceremony is merely a formality and will only take one hour."

Nasdak could tell that his father wasn't looking forward to attending the ceremony. "You never expected to become the next caste leader when you challenged Shakiri?" Knowing his father's scheming, he found that hard to believe.

Neroon shook his head. "I did not. I only acted to secure Marcus' safety. I was not thinking rationally."

Nasdak's eyes widened. "That is honest."

"It is the truth. Now stay here and watch him closely. I do not trust Shakiri's healers. They feel personally responsible for losing the child, and even though Shakiri is not alive any longer, they may act foolishly."

"Marcus is safe with me," promised Nasdak. "Now do not keep them waiting."

Neroon nodded once and headed for the great hall.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One by one, the clan leaders swore him allegiance and Neroon discovered that Nasdak had been named the new leader of the Star Riders now that the position had become vacant by him accepting caste leadership. His son wasn't present and would swear the required oath later. As Neroon's eyes scanned the crowd several warriors seemed to look relieved, even pleased. After the ceremony he turned to Barin. The old Minbari looked smugly pleased as well. Neroon finally voiced his thoughts. "No one seems to mourn Shakiri's passing."

"Why should they?" Barin met Neroon's eyes. "Shakiri was a harsh man and a leader without compassion. Most clans wished Shakiri would meet with an accident and then you came along and challenged Shakiri because of his dishonorable behavior. Most of them wish you had done so cycles ago. They lacked the courage to stand up to Shakiri, you found that courage. They admire you for that and they are hoping for better times."

Neroon found himself in a most peculiar situation. He had set out to save Marcus and now he was the leader of the Warrior Caste as well.

"What will you do now?" inquired Barin. "Stay here or move back to your residence? Shakiri's home is yours now. It became yours when he died."

"I won't stay here. The place holds too many unpleasant memories for my new mate. I will take Marcus to my home where he can recover." Neroon suddenly felt an uncontrollable urge to sit with Marcus and he started to excuse himself, but Barin interrupted him.

"You care for the Ranger," said Barin. "We approve of that. We discussed this arrangement while we decided whether or not to name you Shakiri's successor. The fact that you already care for Marcus weighed heavily in your advantage. Take good care of him. To my knowledge he never showed any dishonorable behavior and he deserves to be treated respectfully."

Neroon nodded his head. "It is true. I do care for him and I would like to check on him now."

"Then go, join your mate and prepare for your trip home. Uyi, Zoun. Weyr and I will be in constant contact with you. You will also need to instruct Nasdak in his new duties as clan leader."

"I will take care of everything," promised Neroon. "May I be excused now?"

Barin smiled contently. "Yes."

Neroon quickly turned around and headed for the medical facility.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You will be pleased to learn that Marcus is fit for transport," said Valorum, "Provided that it is a smooth trip and does not last longer than one hour."

Neroon nodded once. "Flying Marcus home will take less than one hour. Prepare him for transport." Looking at Marcus' haggard face, he blamed himself for not interfering sooner. Even despite his anger he should have made sure Shakiri was sticking to the contract. His hurt pride had kept him from doing that.

"Father?" Nasdak approached Neroon. "Is it true? Valorum told me that I am the new clan leader of the Star Riders."

"He told you the truth. I will tell you about your duties we are back home." Neroon looked at Nasdak, pride shining from his eyes. "You will make an excellent clan leader."

"Thank you." Nasdak fought his nervousness. "I will contact one of our flyers and it can take Marcus home. Are you staying or will you join us?"

"I will stay close to Marcus. I am accompanying you." Neroon's fingers itched to make contact with Marcus' skin and he did. "Has he regained consciousness since that one time?"

"No," said Valorum, "The medication is keeping him under. He will stay asleep until we have him settled down at home."

Neroon sighed. "I want to do this now. Nasdak, contact the flyer. Valorum, we will prepare Marcus for transport." A young Minbari healer stepped up to him and Neroon studied Jalai closely. "What do you want?"

"I want to accompany you. Yes, I am a Wind Sword, but I find Shakiri's action despicable. None of the healers wanted to help Marcus and I... I do not want to stay here. May I continue to care for Marcus?"

Neroon considered the request. Valorum could use an assistant and although the healers at his home were preparing for Marcus' arrival, they didn't know about the nature of his injuries, Jalai did. "Yes, you may join us. Now give me a moment alone with Marcus."

Valorum, Nasdak and Jalai left the room and Neroon sat down on the side of the rigged platform. "We are going home, Marcus, home. And this time I won't let you go again."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"How is he doing?" Neroon personally supervised Marcus' transport. Carrying out his wishes, his servants had made a comfortable bed in Marcus' former quarters. They had taken a soft mattress and tucked pillows around the edge. Lying on a hard platform would only increase Marcus' discomfort while his ribs were healing.

"He never noticed he was being moved," said Valorum pleased, "but he should not be moved again."

Nasdak and Jalai gently lowered Marcus on to the center of the mattress and Jalai proceeded to cover the Ranger with warm blankets. "Marcus should be comfortable like this," said Jalai, "Do we take turns sitting with him or...?"

Valorum nodded his head. "Yes, that would be wise. We need to sleep as well. I will stay with him for the next few hours. Get some rest, young Jalai."

Jalai left, and Neroon turned to Nasdak. "I want to have a word with Valorum in private and I want you to contact Delenn. I will talk to her soon. Tell her what happened, but don't answer her questions."

Nasdak bowed and left as well. Neroon and Valorum exchanged concerned looks. "Tell me," started Neroon, "what must I expect during the next few days?"

"Marcus has not yet realized that he lost his child. Once that happens he might suffer shock. It is important that we reassure him, make him feel safe and wanted."

Valorum's words made sense to Neroon. "I want to sit with him as well. Work me into your schedule."

"As you wish." Valorum walked over to the improvised bed and examined the Ranger. "He is peacefully asleep. Do you want me to call you when he wakes up?"

"Yes, I want to talk to him." Neroon didn't want to leave Marcus, but duty called. He had to talk to Delenn.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Father, I told her what happened. She seemed... shocked." Nasdak didn't know what to make of Delenn's reaction. He had expected her to be a cold hearted woman, but she appeared genuinely concerned for Marcus' well-being.

Neroon's eyes fastened on Delenn, who was still on screen. "Nasdak, leave me now. I need to talk to Delenn in private." Nasdak obeyed and Neroon faced Delenn.

"Neroon! I did not know that Shakiri was mistreating Marcus. I heard rumors, but..."

Neroon raised a hand, silencing her. "This is all your fault to begin with. How could you let him sign that contract, knowing damn well that Marcus was a helpless hostage once he set foot in Shakiri's residence? When I got to him, he was barely alive!"

"Neroon..."

"No, you will listen to me now. I condemn your original plan as well. How could you send Marcus here with the order to seduce me? Was it because you needed my support and my help in locating the traitor?" Neroon shook his head and felt pleased when Delenn's eyes grew big. "You knew I had feelings for him and you decided to use that against me. That is not fair play... but then again you are not a warrior so you would not understand. I want the text of the contract changed. Marcus is my mate, not the caste leader's. Do you understand? I won't risk losing Marcus in the future."

"You still love him..."

"Yes, I do, but you cannot use that against me any longer. You delivered Marcus into Shakiri's hands, knowing what lay in store for him. Marcus has been hurt enough. He will stay with me now. Do I make myself clear?"

Delenn nodded her head, feeling nervous. "How is Marcus?"

"Nasdak probably told you that he lost the child?"

"Yes," said Delenn, "and your son also told me that Marcus is in a bad way. Can I talk to him?"

Neroon laughed embittered. "Talk to him? Talk? Marcus is heavily sedated, and the one moment he was awake, he was feverish. He is stable, but his recovery will take weeks, maybe even months. I do not want you bothering him with Ranger affairs. He needs to heal!"

"I did not know he was that badly hurt," revealed Delenn. "I am to blame."

"Yes you are and you won't contact Marcus any time soon. He is too weak to deal with this. I will contact you if there any new developments." Neroon abruptly terminated the connection and checked in with Valorum. Before he went to sleep he wanted one last update on Marcus' condition. "Any changes?"

"Not yet, Neroon," said Valorum. "And let us hope it stays that way. He needs rest."

Reassured, Neroon left Valorum to watch over his charge and headed for the bathroom, where he took a long hot shower. Shakiri had managed to land a few blows and he was sporting bruises himself, but none as bad as those that marred Marcus' skin. After drying his skin, he slipped into some comfortable black robes and lay down on his tilted sleeping platform. Knowing Marcus was safe helped him sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Neroon? Marcus is waking up."

Neroon immediately rose from his platform. At least he had gotten a few hours of sleep. "I am on my way, Valorum." He wanted to be there to reassure Marcus when the Ranger finally came around. As he put on black trousers and a long sleeved shirt, he decided against putting on the epaulettes and armor. Marcus had been around some very unfriendly warriors these last eight months and would probably react with hostility to seeing a uniform. After putting on his boots, he walked in to the bathroom and splashed some water on his face, fully waking up. After checking his appearance in the mirror, he left for Marcus' rooms.

The door opened and he stepped inside. Valorum stood next to Marcus' improvised bed and ran a scanner over the Ranger's body. "How much longer?"

"He will wake up within the next five minutes," said Valorum. "I will stay close, just in case he needs medical attention."

Neroon nodded once and sat down on the side of the bed. After taking Marcus' hand in his, he rubbed it soothingly. Marcus' eyelids fluttered hesitantly and then the green eyes finally opened. The startled expression in them urged Neroon to act. "Marcus, you are back at my home. Shakiri cannot hurt you any longer." He decided against telling Marcus just yet that Shakiri was dead, uncertain how the Ranger would react to that news.

The large, startled eyes stared at the ceiling, preventing making eye contact. Suddenly, a shocked moan left Marcus' lips and his other hand went to his abdomen. His eyes grew even bigger, finding a flat abdomen.

"I am sorry, Marcus, but you took a fall and the child did not survive. Valorum fought hard to save your life, but he could do nothing for the child." Even though the child had existed merely of Shakiri's DNA, Marcus would feel some connection with the child after carrying it for seven months. He gently squeezed Marcus' hand, but the Ranger jerked away from him, drawing away his hand. Helplessly, Neroon wondered what to do. "Marcus, would you look at me?" Maybe talking would help.

But Marcus remained silent, staring at the ceiling and rubbing his abdomen in small circles. His loss was visible in his blank stare and Neroon cringed, realizing how hard helping Marcus heal would be. "Marcus, you do not have to worry about Shakiri ever again. I took care of him. You can stay here, with me, as long as you want. Is there anything I can do to help?"

Neroon was desperate for a word or sign from Marcus, but the only reply he got were a few tears, sliding down Marcus' cheek as the Ranger finally realized that he was no longer pregnant. Valen, he hated being this helpless and useless. He reached out, planning to take Marcus' hand in his again, but the Ranger kept it tightly against his abdomen, not allowing Neroon to comfort him. "Marcus..." The Ranger was locking him out.

"Maybe he needs more rest," suggested Valorum. "He will talk to us when he is ready."

Neroon had monitored Marcus closely and noticed the rigid tension in the Ranger's body as Valorum approached. "Marcus, this is my healer, Valorum. He is responsible for your recovery. He won't hurt you." Shakiri's healers probably hadn't been gentle with Marcus.

Marcus' eyes closed again and his head lolled to the right. Only now did Neroon notice that Valorum had injected a tranquilizer in one of the IV ports. "His reaction scared me. He won't even acknowledge me."

"Marcus needs time, Neroon. He just lost his child, finds himself in new surroundings again and he does not know what to make of your and my presence. Is there a reason why he should feel uncomfortable in your presence?"

Neroon flinched; feeling guilty. "I threatened to kill him if we ever met again. He probably thinks I will carry out that threat once he feels better. Why did I say I would challenge him to Denn'Sha and not stop short?"

"The next time he wakes up you have to reassure him that he is safe," said Valorum. "I suggest you concentrate on your new duties as caste leader for the next few hours. Marcus won't wake up any time soon."

"Will you notify me when he does wake up?" Neroon got to his feet, trying to act soundlessly. When the door opened, he frowned, displeased with more visitors, but his expression softened seeing Nasdak walk up to him. His son found himself in unfamiliar territory now that he was clan leader, but so far Nasdak seemed up to the challenge.

"Uyi sent you a message and expects a reply," said Nasdak. "Any changes in Marcus' condition?"

"He just woke up again," said Neroon, "but he did not acknowledge me. I do believe he realizes that the lost the child. He is in some sort of shock."

"You need to be patient, Neroon." Valorum sighed. "Losing a child is a very traumatic event, give him time."

Neroon nodded his head. "But I worry about him."

"And you should." Valorum smiled reassuringly. "Go, attend to your matters and I will look after Marcus. Jalai will relieve me in two hours so do not be surprised when it is he and not I who contacts you."

"Thank you, my old friend." Neroon smiled thankfully and then gestured his son to follow him.

Valorum took his seat again, sitting close to the bed and he watched Marcus' vital signs carefully, expecting nightmares to torment the Ranger.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Marcus didn't dare to breathe too deeply. His lungs hurt and his abdomen felt tense. His right hand rested on the bed; IV's were attached to the skin. With his other hand, he rubbed circles over his abdomen. My God, I lost him... I lost my son... Although he knew that he wouldn't have any rights to the child, it had become an essential part of him. When Shakiri's healers had implanted the embryo in his body he hadn't known how to act, how to feel, but once his belly had started to grow, he had felt the child inside him, felt him kick and move about. Shakiri had told him that the child was a boy and that he would never see the boy again after birth and it had made carrying the baby even more important, because it was the only time they could spend together.

His memories of the last few days were very vague. At one point he had thought he had heard Neroon and Nasdak's voice, but he had dismissed that absurd idea. Shakiri had kept him in a state of near unconsciousness since he had talked back to the caste leader. Shakiri had lost his temper and had backhanded him across the room. When Shakiri finally realized he could have hurt his son, he had fussed over him, but then he had ordered the healers to keep him sedated until the moment of birth and now he had lost his child. Knowing that Shakiri would take the child away from him, he hadn't given his son a name, trying to control the hurt that would follow after Shakiri moved in and took their son away.

Neroon said I took a fall and lost my child... A fall? Why don't I remember taking that fall? But then again, my memory isn't what it used to be, must be the drugs... I lost my child, lost him before I had the change to look at him. He's dead now... why am I still alive? Why couldn't it be me? It's not right, a child dying... it should have been me... Unable to control his sorrow any longer, tears dripped from his chin.

The healer, Valorum, had fallen asleep in his chair and wasn't paying him any attention.

Before his pregnancy, Shakiri had delighted in calling him names and humiliating him. Then the beatings had started. When he was with child, Shakiri had aimed his punches at his face, not wanting to accidentally hurt his son. These last eight months had been hell and he couldn't believe the torment was over.

Suddenly, Valorum stirred, opened his eyes and got to his feet. Marcus sighed, relieved, when Valorum turned away from him. He used the back of his hand to wipe away his tears. Closing his eyes tightly, he tried to ignore the images of a screaming baby, calling him a murderer. It was an accident... an accident! I wanted you to live!

Two strong arms suddenly pulled him upright. Startled, expecting to see Shakiri loom over him, he peeked at the man. My God, where did Neroon come from? I didn't hear him enter...

Neroon offered him his shoulder to cry on, but he froze, unable to show his pain and sorrow with someone close. Neroon held him, muttering soft reassurances, but they didn't register with him. Neroon had threatened to kill him if they ever met again... or was this a dream? Had to be a dream. Neroon would never hold him like this after learning about his mission to seduce the Minbari. His tears refused to fall and he grew tense, barely keeping himself from freeing himself of the embrace; he lacked the strength to do so.

"Marcus, you are safe. Shakiri can no longer hurt you. You are safe here. I will stay with you."

No, go away! Leave me alone... I don't know what to make of this, please... But his vocal chords refused to work properly and his protest came out as a series of grunts and moans.

"I do not pretend to know how you are feeling, Marcus. I do know losing a child must hurt tremendously, but I am here for you. I want you to know that there is peace between us. I won't challenge you to Denn'Sha because you lured me into a trap. I am furious with Delenn, not with you. Please let me comfort you."

Slightly reassured, Marcus rested his head against Neroon's shoulder, soaking up the other man's warmth and closeness. Looking down, he stared at his flat abdomen, only hidden by a blanket. He wore some loose, blue robes and the improvised bed made him frown. Why a bed? Why not a platform?

"You should rest, Marcus, or do you wish to talk to me? I will answer your questions honestly."

No, I don't want to talk to you. I want my child back... Fighting back his tears, he buried his fingernails in the fabric of Neroon's shirt. He felt relieved that Neroon wasn't wearing the uniform, which he had come to hate so much. Marcus had quickly closed his eyes, unable to meet Neroon's gaze.

Neroon exchanged a troubled glance with Valorum, who stood in the corner of the room, keeping his distance. The old healer nodded his head and Neroon took charge of the situation, deciding to be completely honest with Marcus.

"Nasdak found a data crystal, which contained a conversation you had with Delenn. You told her you loved me; that I was the other half of your soul, that we fit perfectly." Marcus stayed tense, but he could tell that the Ranger was listening. It encouraged him to continue. "I regret not letting you explain things to me and... Nasdak told me that Shakiri was mistreating you so I traveled to Shakiri's residence. Nasdak and I slipped inside and we found you sedated. I had to act and challenged Shakiri to Denn'Sha."

Marcus stirred, groaned and buried his face against Neroon's chest. What? Neroon couldn't be serious! Shakiri was caste leader and Neroon had challenged him to Denn'Sha? Over him?

"Shakiri lost the fight and died... It was an accident. I wanted to let him live; Minbari do not kill Minbari. The Council elected me new caste leader and I took you here, hoping you would recover here faster than when we had stayed at Shakiri's residence." My God, does that mean I'm your property now? Do you expect me to carry your children as well? I don't think I can do that... I feel dead inside.

Marcus trembled in his arms and Neroon frowned. He had hoped that Marcus would feel more comfortable, knowing Shakiri couldn't hurt him any more, but he had been mistaken. The trembling grew worse and Marcus started shaking. "Valorum?" The healer approached the two men. "I would prefer not to sedate him again. The medication needs to leave his body. Try to reassure him by words."

Neroon tenderly stroked the dark locks and rocked Marcus in his arms. "You are safe. No one will hurt you."

Marcus forced himself to calm down. He didn't know what Neroon wanted from him and it was best to wait and see what demands Neroon had. He should rest in the meantime, try to grow strong again. Closing his eyes, he let himself relax. Neroon's arms were wrapped around him once more, holding him tight. Concentrating on feeling safe, he slowly dozed off.

"Good," said Valorum, "he is asleep again. You may let go now."

Neroon made sure Marcus was resting comfortably and tucked the blanket around the Ranger's form. "Something I said upset him."

Valorum considered Neroon's observation. "Marcus might realize that he is your mate now and he might fear you will treat him the same way Shakiri did."

Neroon stared at the healer in disbelief. "I would never hurt him!"

"I know that, but Marcus lived with Shakiri for eight months. He might find that hard to believe."

"Then I will convince him!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nasdak had watched Marcus closely for the last thirty minutes. He had relieved Valorum and Jalai was hovering in the back of the room, checking the notes Valorum had made in Marcus' medical file. Frowning, he wondered why Marcus refused to meet his eyes or talk to him. It was obvious that Marcus was awake; the Ranger's breathing gave him away and yet Marcus pretended to be asleep. His father had told him of Marcus' isolated state, but he still hoped they would find a way to get through to Marcus.

Leaning in closer, he cocked his head, launching another attempt to communicate with Marcus. "I know you are awake, Marcus. Why won't you talk to me? I know you are probably angry with me for keeping you away from Neroon, but I thought I was doing the right thing. I apologize for being that stubborn." Nothing. Marcus didn't react. His breathing quickened slightly, but that was about it.

"Any changes?" Neroon entered the room and joined his son.

"No, I am afraid not. He is awake though." Nasdak frowned. "I cannot get him to talk to me."

"I failed as well," said Neroon, "Valorum told me that Marcus might continue to act this way for some time." Neroon signaled Nasdak to join him in the corridor where Marcus couldn't hear them. "This must stop. We cannot allow Marcus to lock us out." Nasdak nodded. "He keeps rubbing his abdomen, as if..." Nasdak suddenly locked eyes with his father. "What if he blames himself for the child's death? His fall was an accident, but..."

"We need to unleash his sorrow, but how? Marcus has been like this for two days now. It is not healthy and Valorum also worries."

Nasdak suddenly smiled. "I might know something... I will be back shortly... I want to try something."

Neroon nodded once. "Let us hope your idea works. I will sit with him in the meantime."

Nasdak hurried away and Neroon entered Marcus' rooms again. After sitting down, he took hold of Marcus' hand and stroked the icy skin.

Marcus stared outside. The window gave him an excellent view of the gardens and the emerald colored lake. Valorum and Jalai had moved him to a comfortable chair so he could look at the water and the sky. Neroon had left thirty minutes ago and he had been disappointed and relieved at the same time. He didn't know what he felt, what he was supposed to feel when Neroon was close. The man totally confused him. Neroon had been so furious after finding out about his mission and now Neroon was taking care of him? That didn't make any sense.

He wrapped both arms around his waist, recalling how it had felt to feel his son grow inside him. His eyes teared up, staring at the lake. The sun was about to set and he wished he could still flee into a sedated state, but Valorum no longer administered him those meds. The only medication he got was to fight the pain his bruised ribs caused.

How could he ever go on with his life? This miscarriage had changed his life forever. He hadn't even seen the child. Sobbing softly, he rubbed his abdomen. A soft mew suddenly echoed through the room. No, he wasn't paying it any attention! Another mew, low and pitiful flowed through the room, calling out to him. A small Gok, a kitten really, stumbled into the room. Something appeared to be wrong with the kitten's legs as it stumbled and fell, stumbled and fell, unable to keep upright. The kitten finally made it to his chair and collapsed onto its stomach, mewing helplessly.

The black kitten's big eyes locked with his and Marcus quickly looked away, seeing the need for affection in them. No, he wasn't going to react, but the mews continued and the kitten awkwardly tried to rub against his legs, stumbling again. Unable to watch the kitten's pitiful attempts to draw his attention any longer, Marcus slowly bent forward and gently scooped it up in his hands. One IV pushed deeper in his skin, but he ignored it. He had forgotten about the healers' presence and stared at the kitten.

"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with your mother? And what's wrong with your legs?" Instinctively he massaged them to increase the leg's flexibility. The kitten mewed softly, trying to get away from the probing fingers. Marcus released the small animal and stared entranced, as it began to gently massage his abdomen with its soft feet. "No, stop doing that, please." But the kitten continued and tears escaped his eyes. Somehow the kitten's action released his anger and sorrow and he clutched it tightly to his chest, ignoring the soft mews.

"I'm sorry, sorry, didn't want you to die... It was an accident. I did love you..." Marcus rubbed his face against the soft fur and the kitten purred softly. "I'm so sorry..." Sobbing violently, he refused to let go of the kitten, smothering it.

"Marcus..." Neroon sneaked closer, pulled up another chair and leaned in closer, folding his arms around the Ranger. "Do not hold her so tightly. The little one won't run away... Release your hold just a little." Watching Marcus shake like a leaf, he rescued the struggling kitten and placed her on Marcus' lap. He held Marcus tightly, rubbing his back with soothing strokes. "Let go. Let go of the pain..." He privately thanked his son for coming up with this idea.

"I didn't want to lose the child... I know Shakiri wanted the baby for himself, but I... Why did I lose the child? I wanted to see him just once. I knew Shakiri wouldn't allow me close, but I felt him grow, move about, kick. I wanted my son to live."

Neroon swallowed hard. "I saw the child."

"What?" Marcus finally looked up and made eye contact with Neroon.

"He was a perfect copy of Shakiri. I doubt he used any of your DNA, wanting the child to be purely Minbari." Neroon slowly raised his right hand and brushed Marcus' lips with his fingertips. "I am so relieved that you are finally talking to me."

Marcus grew pale. "You set me up."

"Actually, it was Nasdak who came up with the idea. This little one's mother does not care for her. The kitten's legs are deformed and..."

Marcus didn't know how to react to the revelation that they had set him up. "All this to make me talk?"

"All this to make you admit your pain." Neroon cupped Marcus' chin in the palm of his hand and raised the Ranger's face, locking eyes with him. "I care about you... I still love you..."

Marcus fought his nervousness. "Even after the things I put you through?"

Neroon lowered Marcus back into the chair, realizing he was putting pressure on the bruised ribs. "I regret judging you like that, and Nasdak regrets not giving you a chance as well. Now we are hoping you will give us the chance we denied you."

Marcus nodded once and stroked the kitten's back. The Gok settled down on his lap and put her little head on her paws, feeling content. "What do you want from me?" It was better to get this over with.

Neroon frowned. "I do not understand."

"I'm not sure I can carry your children, not after... after losing..." His breath hitched and more tears surfaced in his eyes. "I'll try to be the mate you always wanted."

Neroon gently caressed Marcus' face. "I already have a son. If you ever decide to have our child it will be because you want it. I will not force you to carry my child. I am too old to raise a newborn."

"You already have a son?" He hadn't known that, but it did calm him down. His biggest fear was suffering a miscarriage again.

"Yes, and I am very proud of him." Puzzled, Neroon watched Marcus. Hadn't he told Marcus that Nasdak was his son? Suddenly he wasn't that sure anymore. "Do you wish to meet him?"

"Can I?" Marcus felt uncertain, wondering what this meant.

"Valorum, send for my son!"

"Yes, Neroon." Valorum left at once.

"So you don't need me to carry your children?" Marcus wasn't sure what he felt. The Gok felt warm on his lap and one of Neroon's arms was still wrapped tightly around his waist.

"No," said Neroon, "I want you as my lover. I want back what we shared those weeks when you were living here as my lover."

"I'm no longer that man, Neroon." warned Marcus, "I changed."

"And so did I." The door opened and Neroon gestured Nasdak to approach them. "Marcus, meet my son." He carefully monitored Marcus' reaction to seeing Nasdak. At first, the Ranger tensed, but then a puzzled expression appeared in his eyes.

"Yes," said Neroon, taking pity on Marcus, "Nasdak is my son and my successor."

Marcus tried to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat. "Son...?"

"Yes," said Nasdak, "Neroon is my father." He approached slowly, giving Marcus time to get used to his presence. "I am sorry I misjudged you, but I am very protective of my father and I feared you were using him."

Marcus' body suddenly went limp against his and Neroon looked up, alarmed. "Valorum?"

"He fainted. This was too much information at once." Valorum quickly checked Marcus' pulse and breathing. "Let us put him back in bed."

Neroon lifted the Ranger and carried him to his bed, gently lowering him in to the comfort of the mattress. The kitten clung to Marcus, having buried her claws in his shirt. Neroon tried to convince the kitten to let go, but it actually hissed at him!

"Let the Gok stay. She helped Marcus get in touch with his feelings. She is a poor excuse for a child, but she will help him deal with the loss." Valorum made sure Marcus was resting comfortably. "I am confident that his recovery has started. He is no longer locking you out. Now you have to persevere and support him as he deals with the loss of his child."

Nasdak rested a hand on Neroon's shoulder, assuring his father that he would be there for Marcus as well. "We will both support him."

Pleased, Neroon nodded his head once. He was determined to find the free spirit that had attracted him in the first place and that had now been pushed to the background after everything Marcus had been through. I will prove my love to him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Marcus woke again, he found himself cocooned in warm blankets. Nasdak was sitting in a chair next to his bed and was reading some reports. "Why is it that every time I wake up either you or Neroon are here?"

Nasdak smiled, pleased that Marcus was addressing him. "Your health is very important to Neroon and therefore it's also very important to me. I want my father to be happy."

"You never told me Neroon was your father." Marcus grew aware of movement beneath the blankets and curiously, he checked it out. The Gok had curled up against his chest, keeping him company. "She was your idea?"

"Guilty," admitted Nasdak, "I hoped she would help you get in touch with your feelings. I... feel guilty, you know."

"Guilty?" Carefully, Marcus pushed himself in a sitting position. His ribs and wrist hurt, but the pillows supported him nicely.

"It is my fault you lost your son."

Marcus' eyes widened. Why was Nasdak bringing this up now? "Why is it your fault?" Seeing Nasdak's surprise, he explained. "I don't remember much."

"Gahen, my second in command was carrying you and I slammed into you, sending you down the stairs." Nasdak closed his eyes. "When we finally got to you, you looked..." Nasdak tried to push away the memories. "I found a healer and Jalai told me that you had lost the child. I am sorry... This is my fault."

Marcus' heart thundered. "No, it isn't your fault." Hesitantly, he reached for Nasdak's hand. "It's Shakiri's fault for keeping me drugged and it's my fault for ever signing that contract. You merely tried to help me."

Nasdak placed his hand on top of Marcus'. "I need to apologize for Shakiri's actions. The way he treated you was without honor. You do know that neither Neroon nor I will ever hurt you?"

Marcus managed to smile. "Yes, I know that I'm safe here." The Gok stretched and stumbled over her feet when she tried to move toward his face. Marcus gently scooped her up and smiled at her. "What do I do with her?"

"She would make a good pet. If we put her back with the rest of the litter she would not survive."

Marcus gave Nasdak a thoughtful look. "I never knew you're Neroon's son."

Nasdak shrugged. "It never came up."

"Is Shakiri really dead?"

Marcus' question took Nasdak aback. "Yes, Shakiri is dead."

"There were times when I wanted him dead," revealed Marcus. "I... hated him."

"Nasdak? I will sit with Marcus now." Neroon had heard the last few sentences and wanted to be the one Marcus confided in. Nasdak rose from the chair, bowed slightly and left. Neroon took his place and clasped Marcus' hand in his. The Gok gave him a hard look and then curled up in Marcus' arms, feeling totally comfortable resting against the warm body. "Marcus, what did Shakiri do to you?"

Marcus licked his lips and averted his eyes. "Nothing major. He called me names, humiliated me in front of his men...Then he started to beat me up. At first, I fought him, but it's hard to defend yourself when two Minbari are holding you. When I was with child, I merely accepted the blows. I didn't want to endanger the child."

"That is in the past now," promised Neroon, "but I need to ask you one more thing."

"Yes?" Marcus steeled himself for every possible question, not knowing what Neroon wanted to know.

"Are you still my lover? Do you want to be my official mate? I still love you and I want to be with you. I want you to be my mate in every sense of the word. My men will respect you, I will respect you. You will hold the position that is yours by right of marriage."

Marcus smiled saddened. "Neroon, I'm a mess... Shakiri never touched me intimately; don't get me wrong, but... I don't know if I can be around you all the time. You're Minbari, your bone crest, your way of speaking, acting, they remind me of Shakiri. I don't want to exchange being his prisoner for being yours. Shakiri made it very clear that I was his property, that I no longer had the right to make my own decisions. It will take me a while to... to be me again."

"I understand that, Marcus, but I can help you heal. Our love was true, I know that now. It can help you heal. I still want to hold you, make love to you... That has not changed."

"I want that to," admitted Marcus, "but... Bugger, I'm not going to cry again!" When he had been Shakiri's prisoner he had never cried and now he wasn't able to stop.

"Marcus, move over..." Neroon got to his feet and sat down on the side of the bed. "Sleeping in the horizontal is tempting death, but I gladly risk eternal sleep for you."

Luckily the bed was big enough for both of them. It took Marcus some time to move over, careful not to pull out the IV's. The Gok stirred, displeased, but when Marcus moved her closer to him, she settled down again. Neroon lay down as well, facing Marcus, opened his arms and gave the Ranger the time he needed to make himself comfortable.

"I like this," confessed Marcus. "I missed this. When I was lonely at night I tried to remember what it was like, waking up in your arms. This feels surreal. I can't believe I'm here, that Shakiri's dead and that... that I lost..." His hand searched for the kitten and gently stroked the smooth fur.

Neroon tightened the embrace. "You will heal, I promise."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Marcus clenched his teeth, trying to walk for the first time since Neroon had rescued him from Shakiri. Whenever he had sat in the chair near the balcony one of the Minbari had carried him, now he wanted to try on his own. "I can do this..." Marcus accepted Neroon's help, knowing damn well he couldn't make it on his own.

"Slowly, Marcus. Just place one foot in front of the other." Neroon supported Marcus as the Ranger walked toward the balcony. It was a warm day and they had placed the chair outside so Marcus could feel the rays of the sun on his skin.

"I made it..." sighed Marcus. "I wasn't sure I could do it." Marcus released a deep breath and leaned into the comfort of the chair. It felt good to be back in the sun after such a long time. Neroon had pulled up a chair and now sat beside him. The silence and serenity of the sunset made him feel at peace.

"Here, she wants to be near you." Neroon placed the now slightly larger Gok on Marcus' lap. "You should name her."

"I don't know what to call her," admitted Marcus. "I don't want to grow too attached to her..."

Neroon understood. "Goks grow very old. She will keep you company for the largest part of your life." Marcus still mourned his son's death, which was perfectly understandable. "You are recovering, Marcus, give it time."

Marcus patted the kitten, who was kneading his still sensitive stomach. "Stop doing that..." He picked up the kitten and stroked her tummy. She purred appreciatively. "Can I ask you something personal, Neroon?"

"Yes?" Neroon moved a little closer, noticing the cautious tone to Marcus' voice.

"If I ever decided I wanted a child... your child... what would you do?"

Aha, a test... Neroon cleared his throat and gazed into Marcus' eyes. "I would make sure you want to do this and that you are not feeling pressured in doing that. I told you before, I have a son, I do not require more children, but if you really wanted one... I would give it to you. I would stay close during your pregnancy and pamper you. I am not Shakiri. I would not sedate you and humiliate you. I will love you and care for you." Neroon felt relieved, seeing Marcus' pleased smile. "But why would you want to go through that ordeal again? You barely survived your last pregnancy."

Marcus briefly closed his eyes. "I wanted to have this child, my son, even if it was Shakiri's. And I... I'm wondering what kind of parent I would be. Yes, I know that Shakiri would never have let me close to the child, but... I feel cheated, like I lost something really precious and..."

"If you want to have my child in the future, we will discuss that and... you do not have to put yourself through pregnancy again. I can carry the child." Marcus' eyes changed to blue and Neroon loved seeing that particular shade.

"You'd do that for me?" whispered Marcus in disbelief, "You'd..." His voice failed him. "I shouldn't be thinking about this just yet."

Neroon smiled warmly. "You are healing, Marcus. You are moving on." Neroon cleared his throat. "Valorum thinks your recovery is satisfactory and... I was wondering... Would you move in to my quarters? Share them with me? I will understand if you want to stay here where you can have your privacy."

"Neroon, are you serious? I..." Marcus briefly lost himself in patting the Gok, who was purring and rolling on to her back, offering him her tummy. "Do you really forgive me for playing you the way I did? I really fell in love with you... I thought that having sex with you would be horrible, but I loved it, loved the way you touched me..."

"If we are careful we can make love tonight," suggested Neroon. "I won't put any pressure on your ribs and I would be very careful not to cause you any discomfort."

Marcus blushed. "Do you really want me? Really? After everything that happened? I love you too, but..."

Neroon reacted quickly and placed his hands on either side of Marcus' head. "You are my mate, my lover, let me love you. Let me prove my love to you."

Speechless, Marcus stared into Neroon's dilated pupils. "Yes, I want that too."

"And you will share my quarters with me? My life?"

"If you want me..."

"Stupid question..." remarked Neroon. "Of course I want you..."

Marcus smiled brilliantly and leaned in to kiss Neroon. Thank you for coming after me, Neroon. I'll always love you. I'll love you as long as I'll live.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"It's strange to be back," whispered Marcus. "I never thought I'd ever set foot in here again." Marcus followed Neroon's instructions and sat down in a chair, letting Neroon put away the few things he possessed. "Uhm, Neroon? Where did those turtlenecks and shirts come from? I don't remember owning that many trousers and what are those robes doing in my drawer?" Neroon had assigned him some drawers and Marcus frowned, seeing Neroon put away boots, socks and underwear.

"I talked to Sech Turval," revealed Neroon. "He was glad to help and sent some clothes and other items, like..." Neroon opened the duffle bag, "something called shampoo?"

Marcus smiled. "Good old Sech Turval. I always liked him."

Neroon put the toiletries in the bathroom and then joined Marcus. "Are you tired? You have been too long on your feet. Valorum told me you still need rest."

"Neroon, what happened to your sleeping platform?" Marcus wondered about the Minbari. Why the changes?

"I had the single removed and a larger one placed. I covered it with a comforter and added some pillows. I want you to be comfortable as long as you are healing."

Marcus averted his eyes. It had been months since someone had been this kind to him and he was still getting used to it. "You didn't have to do that."

"But I wanted to. Would you like to rest until dinner? I will ask the cook to serve dinner in my... our rooms." Neroon grabbed a blanket and covered Marcus with it. "Are you comfortable?"

"Yes, but where's Legs?" The kitten stumbled up to him. She would probably always be handicapped and Marcus fully accepted that, caring for the Gok anyway. "Come here, you." He picked up the kitten and waited for her to settle down in his lap. "Wake me for dinner?"

Neroon placed a tender kiss on Marcus' brow. "Sleep and do not worry, agreed?"

"Agreed..." His eyes were already closing. The trip to Neroon's quarters had exhausted him.

Now that Marcus was asleep, Neroon started to prepare for a very special night.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A sweet fragrance woke Marcus several hours later. What's that smell? Roses? Confused, he opened his eyes and briefly forgot to breathe. Neroon's quarters had undergone another transformation. Scented candles emanated a sweet smell and graced the room with a soft, warm light. Dinner was already served and Marcus discovered fruits, bread and several other food items on Neroon's desk. He wasn't that hungry and ignored the food, searching for Neroon. In the center of the room stood the large, rigged, platform and Neroon stood next to it. My God, he's naked... I missed him, missed feeling him, seeing him like this...

Confidently, Neroon strutted over to Marcus and extended his hand. "Let me help."

Marcus cocooned Legs in the blanket and placed her safely on the floor. "What?" Stunned, he closed his eyes as Neroon's hands gently caressed his face, throat, neck and then began removing the loose robes he was wearing.

"Do you wish to eat or make love first?"

Marcus trembled. The passionate tone in Neroon's voice told him what the Minbari preferred. "I want to feel you..." Neroon's strong and yet incredibly gentle hands guided him to the rigged platform. He placed one hand behind Neroon's neck and allowed the Minbari to lift and place him on the platform. "I want this, I need this... I had no idea how badly I missed you until..."

Neroon silenced him with a kiss. Agile fingers quickly removed Marcus' underwear and Neroon sighed appreciatively. Most bruises were gone and only the bandages reminded him of the abuse Marcus had suffered at Shakiri's hands. "I love you, Marcus."

"I love you too. I wish I had told you before you found out, but..."

"I silenced you that night with a kiss," recalled Neroon. "You did try to tell me."

Marcus' breath caught. "Yes, that's right, I..."

"Let us not dwell on the past. We are here now and I want to make love to you..." Neroon straddled Marcus' hips, but was careful not to put any weight on the healing ribs. "Let me love you..." Bowing forward, he licked Marcus' lips, suckled his bottom lip and then moved down, licking the Ranger's throat. "I missed you... missed feeling you beneath me..." Marcus tried to raise his hips, but Neroon admonished him. "Do not do that. Let me do the work. You are still healing."

Marcus licked his lips. It had been eight, almost nine months since he had been in Neroon's arms. "I won't last long..."

"Only pleasure, only joy." Neroon showered Marcus' chest with butterfly kisses, slowly descending to the Ranger's groin, finding Marcus hard and eager. "Tell me what you want, my love."

"You inside me..." Tears pooled in Marcus' eyes, remembering how complete he had felt when Neroon had been inside him.

"Your ribs?"

"I can manage." Marcus bit his bottom lip as Neroon's tongue twisted around his leaking cock, lapping, teasing and blowing cool air over the sensitive head. "Neroon, please..." He felt like a rag doll, having lost control over his body. He wanted this union, wanted to put Shakiri behind him. Yelping softly, he buried his fingernails in the blankets as Neroon closed his lips over his cock, taking in more, deep throating him until he was mumbling incoherently. "I love you, Neroon, I really do."

Neroon pulled back and met his lover's gaze. "I know you do." He reached for the oil and generously coated his cock with the slippery substance. "Marcus?"

"Please do it, I need you!" Marcus grabbed Neroon's head, pulled the Minbari close and brutally kissed him. "Now, please..." Taken aback by his lover's need, Neroon positioned himself and slowly pushed past the ring of muscle. He was inside, barely. I should have prepared him, but... Their pace had been frantic, both of them seeking union and he had let passion overwhelm him.

"Deeper, please..." Marcus raised his hips, and pulled Neroon closer. His eyes widened, feeling Neroon ease inside and he finally felt whole, complete. "Yes..."

Neroon stayed perfectly still, not moving at all. Thrusting would put too much pressure on Marcus' mending ribs and he wrapped his fingers around Marcus' cock, stroking gently, slowly, prolonging their union. Licking Marcus' earlobe, he whispered soft words of love. "I love you... Marcus. You are my mate, my love, my life. I will never let you go."

Marcus groaned and climaxed. His come dripped into Neroon's hand and he trembled, sobbing softly.

Neroon released his own orgasm and took a moment to savor the ecstasy before kissing Marcus again. Slowly, he pulled out and rolled onto his side, facing Marcus. "Your ribs?"

"I'm fine, more than fine. I... I love you, Neroon, and I'm so sorry for all the problems I caused..." His eyes were swimming with joy. Neroon had made love to him, still loved him. "Please hold me?"

Neroon carefully wrapped his arms around him, staying clear of the bruised ribs. "We are together now and we will be until the day we die. We will be happy."

Exhausted, Marcus rested his head against Neroon's shoulder. "I was being honest, you know... You're the other half of my soul..."

"And we fit perfectly. Now go to sleep. When you wake up I will still be here..."

Content, Marcus closed his eyes and snuggled up to Neroon. "Lo...ve... you..."

You were right, Marcus... You are the other half of my soul. Now sleep tight. We got the rest of our lives to make love.

The end June 2002
Continues in Burning Bridges