Title: Rampaging Libido 
Date: January 2002
Author: The Pimpernel
Rating: At a guess PG13 for bad words, sexual 
situations.
Summary: Our heroes with no control - never happen.

Disclaimer etc. in part 1

Part 5 of 5

Paul started to fuss, he picked up what was left of his 
clothes and started up the stairs. He dumped his 
clothes in the basket and was about to go get Paul 
when Scully emerged from the bathroom. 

“I’ll get him, you shower and put some clothes on.” 

He sighed ‘yes ma’am, no ma’am three bags full 
ma’am.’ 

“Hey, you stole my shirt.” 

The fact that she’d been wearing his shirt suddenly 
clicked in his brain. Should he read anything into that? 
There’d been a lot of buttons on the kitchen floor so 
probably not. She looked cute in his shirt though, he 
smiled. 

When he came down from his shower suitable attired, 
Scully had almost finished preparing Paul’s bottle. 
Mulder’s stomach growled in sympathy causing 
Scully to turn towards him. Mulder shrugged 
sheepishly. 

“Here you feed Paul I’ll check on dinner.” 

Mulder’s ears pricked up as he accepted the bottle 
reflexively was he going to get some dinner then. 
Scully turned to the oven giving nothing away and 
checked the casserole. Then she busied herself with 
the salad. Mulder tried to concentrate on Paul but he 
was feeding contentedly giving Mulder plenty of 
opportunity to admire Scully’s ass… er… he meant 
grace, around the kitchen. She turned round just as he 
was mesmerised by the little jiggle she gave… the wet 
lettuce. Oops busted. Fortunately Paul was still 
feeding contentedly otherwise he could have been in 
trouble. Don’t make any playing house jokes, don’t 
make any playing house jokes. 

“What you cooking Scully it smells good?” 

His stomach gave loud secondary approval from the 
sidelines. 

“Lasagne. Are you hungry Mulder?” 

He nodded his head hopefully, he was probably setting 
himself up for a jibe here but he could live in hope. 

“You want me to take Paul now while you get your bit 
of dinner ready?” 

He sighed he knew it was too good to be true, he’d 
have to get his own dinner. 

“No. Fortunately I know the pizza delivery number by 
heart.”

Her eyebrow went up “You don’t want lasagne? It’ll 
only be half an hour.” 

He nodded confused. 

“You promised me chocolate mousse for dessert 
Mulder. No chocolate mousse no lasagne.“ she 
pouted. Scully pouted. The penny dropped one of their 
conversations last night, he’d lost a few brain cells 
since then. 

“Ah chocolate mousse, my part of dinner. I didn’t 
realise you wanted that today.” 

“You said it was quick and easy but divine. We had a 
wager on it.” 

“We most certainly did. It’ll need to chill.” 

“You’ve got half an hour plus the time it takes to eat.” 

“Take Paul. I’ll get right on it.” 

Mulder scurried round the kitchen, rich dark 
chocolate, marshmallow, eggs, not so easy on the rum 
and a microwave. He blessed his memory and Josie, 
one of the girls he’d shared digs with in Oxford. 

He cast his mind back to that occasion, he and Josie 
had met at the front door both so engrossed in their 
own problems, her boyfriend had dumped her, Phoebe 
had just stabbed him through the heart, they hadn’t 
noticed each other until they collided on the door step. 
They had taken one look at each other and decided 
misery needed company. She’d hefted a bottle of rum 
under his nose and said I need comfort food, 
something more exotic than a bar of chocolate. She’d 
proceeded to make chocolate mousse the easy way 
using some of the rum. They’d eaten half the mousse 
while it was still runny and finished the bottle of rum 
and generally managed to get over the ‘hump’ 
together in a cloud of chocolate rum euphoria. 

A few weeks later she’d made the chocolate mousse 
again so he could try it set and told him it wasn’t the 
way to a woman’s heart but it might open a door or 
two. What he did once the door was open was entirely 
up to him. Surprisingly whenever he had a taste of 
rum now it didn’t bring back bad memories of Phoebe 
but of a shared experience with a friend. They hadn’t 
even talked about their problems. As she’d taken a 
swig of the rum and offered it to him, she’d said ‘Girl 
trouble?’ he’d nodded and said ‘boy trouble?’ she’d 
nodded. They’d said ‘bastards’ together, that had 
caused them to laugh at each other. He taken a swig of 
the rum then handed it back. They’d never discussed it 
beyond that. They’d talked all evening he couldn’t 
recall what but a bottle of rum and a chocolate mousse 
later the world wasn’t quite such a miserable place.
Scully almost chuckled as Mulder scampered round 
the kitchen. In someways Mulder behaved like any 
other man. Offer food to get good behaviour, offer sex 
and he agreed to anything. Obviously a sweeping 
generalisation it probably only worked ninety percent 
of the time. A little wicked part of Scully grinned 
evilly to itself. No she couldn’t do that. They needed 
to talk and come to some mutual, rational decisions. 
They’d start after dinner and she wouldn’t think about 
a bare chested Mulder covered in chocolate mousse 
and her licking it off. No. No she wouldn’t. 

The after dinner talk never happened. She’d tasted the 
mousse. It wasn’t a soft light mouse, it was sticky and 
chocolatey and rummy and she had to admit heavenly. 
She was trying hard not to squirm out of the bet, she 
believed in fair play but she couldn’t quite believe 
she’d agreed to a naughty story. About her. To the 
King of Porn. He’d laugh at her somewhat docile 
naughty stories. It’s not that she’d never been game, 
just cautious and she’d attracted fairly conservative 
boyfriends and lovers. Either that or complete 
psychopaths. And she wasn’t sure she was ready for 
such personal revelations yet. Then again left to her 
own devices she probably never would be.  She 
looked at Mulder. He was waiting patiently, not 
pushing on this. He was prepared to drop it. She knew 
he would let her off the hook after a bit of teasing but 
that wouldn’t be fair. Scully liked to play fair. She 
took a deep breath and prepared to be mortified. 

But was saved by the phone. It was Bill, damn her 
mother for never keeping anything from the family. 
She went to take it upstairs, giving her some privacy 
and leaving Mulder the television. She saw Mulder 
smirking at her in some amusement at the irony of Bill 
saving her from the story telling. Truth be told she 
probably rather face Mulder than Bill at the moment. 
By the time she’d finished her conversation with Bill 
she was exhausted. She laid her head back on the bed 
to give herself a few minutes respite blowing out a 
huge breath of air. She closed her eyes for just a 
minute.

Mulder found her dead to the world. He removed her 
shoes and covered her with a blanket, smoothing the 
hair from her face tenderly before heading for bed 
himself.

The following morning was hectic as Scully got called 
in for a consult on an autopsy.  Mulder stayed at home 
with Paul. He was still on compassionate leave. When 
Scully came back in the evening Mulder had cooked - 
again. Nothing special but he’d made the effort and 
not ordered in. Scully was secretly surprised and 
pleased. She’d been on her feet all day again. She was 
looking in on Paul while rolling her shoulders and 
rubbing her neck. Mulder came up behind her with a 
glass of wine for her. 

“I don’t usually drink wine as an every day occurrence 
Mulder,” she said taking it from him. 

“You should, it’s recommended. It’s full of 
antioxidants. One glass a day has proven beneficial 
effects on the heart. Paul’s been good today, hardly 
fractious at all. He’s almost into a pattern.”

 Scully smiled “That’s good, just in time for him to 
start teething and screw the pattern up again.” 

“Oh. Your shoulders stiff?” 

“Yes and my feet ache,” she hesitated “I don’t 
suppose there’s a massage left in the free sample?” 

“I think you’ve used up the free sample Scully.”

 Scully nodded her head in understanding, in 
resignation. She had no idea where to go now, she just 
couldn’t sort her own feelings out. It ought to be so 
simple, yes or no but she was dithering. Mulder saw 
her dilemma, he had no intention of letting her back 
out or pushing her too fast but he did need to know 
they were moving forward. He’d made some progress 
he knew, just the fact that she was here, prepared to 
stay and not bolt home after a bad day was proof of 
that. She’d tested the waters, got her feet wet and not 
found it unacceptable. Actually he suspected she’d 
slipped off the side and got completely immersed, 
scrabbled out again, stood on the side dripping and 
then decided that it actually wasn’t that bad. Jumped 
back in, found herself out of her depth and scrabbled 
out again. Now he had to entice her down to the 
shallow end. Come on in Scully the water’s lovely. 
Once he’d got her in the water he’d worry about 
enticing her to the deep end. 

“If you want a better sample you have to get the trial 
size now.” 

“Trial size?” she asked curiously.

“One you have to buy into but you usually get 
coupons towards buying the full product.”  

“Buy into?” she asked momentarily perplexed. Then 
she realised he meant some form of commitment but 
not the whole enchilada. Could she do that? 
Tentatively her mind wrapped itself round the idea.

Scully nearly dropped her wine when Mulder started 
massaging her shoulders and she certainly couldn’t 
prevent the blissful moan as his fingers started to 
unknot her muscles. Mulder smiled at his success. 

“Come and lie down. I’ll give you a back rub and a 
foot massage. Then you can have a relaxing bath 
while I finish dinner.” 

Scully wanted to protest as he propelled her towards 
her bedroom, but she wasn’t quite sure what she was 
objecting to except that this level of attention was 
uncomfortable, unexpected. Despite the fact she’d 
asked. Before she could get her thoughts together he 
had her sat on the bed, her shoes off and was rubbing 
her feet while kneeling at her feet. It was blissful. 

“Mulder, my feet probably smell, I’ve been on my feet 
all day and…” she tried to pull her foot away. 

“I’ll live” and carried on massaging. Scully put her 
drink down and flopped back on the bed. Some part of 
her mind was sounding alarm bells but they were 
drowned out by the sighs of contentment. Mulder said 
nothing but carefully watched her face for signs of 
discomfort. When he finished her feet he stood up and 
touched her shoulder to get her to turn over. Scully bit 
her lip in indecision. 

“Mulder we need to talk.” 

“Sure, later, after dinner when you’ve put the day 
behind you.” 

He raised his eyebrows at her and nudged her shoulder 
again. Scully was still undecided but something 
nagged inside to give in gracefully. Mulder was being 
kind and attentive she should take advantage of it 
now. It would probably wear off once they were 
married. Oh God married. She turned over before she 
went too far down that track. She still had her jacket 
on, it would be better to take it off, but she was going 
for safety right now. He’d discovered her sensitive 
back and once again her libido was already up and 
prowling. 

As Scully rolled over her libido had in fact rolled out 
of her bed and was looking at the new barricade that 
Rational Scully had erected in her door way this time. 
It looked like a filing cabinet. As Mulder started to 
massage Scully’s shoulders her libido pushed at the 
barricade experimentally. When Mulder finished with 
her shoulders he started to stroke her back. Scully’s 
Libido stepped back as far as she could then barrelled 
forward into the barricade. It tipped forward and 
seemed to hang in the balance momentarily before 
crashing forward onto the floor. Scully’s Libido 
clambered over the debris with a smug smile.

“We said that yesterday Mulder. We can’t keep 
ignoring it.”

Mulder dragged himself and his libido away from 
Scully. 

“I know. Go have your bath Scully.” 

“You not going to bathe me Mulder?” 

Scully’s Libido was now wagging her tail standing in 
front of Mulder’s Libido, ready to play. 

“Don’t tempt me. I’m going to finish dinner” he 
squeaked trying to back out of the bedroom. 
Fortunately this time he had attached his libido’s chain 
to a stake in the ground. It wasn’t getting out of 
control this time. Scully was removing her jacket. 
Mulder’s Libido was barking excitedly at the end of 
his chain. 

“I’ll start running the water for you.,” he said as he 
bolted into the bathroom. He tried not to think of 
Scully undressing in the next room. His libido was 
now yelping excitedly and running round in little 
circles trying to get off the chain. Mulder was so lost 
in his thoughts that he didn’t escape the bathroom 
before Scully came in dressed only in a silk robe. She 
was slightly surprised to see him there thinking he had 
escaped to the kitchen. 

Rational Scully was giving Scully’s Libido a serious 
talking to. We need to wait, this doesn’t solve 
anything, it just clouds the issue, makes things more 
complicated. Scully’s Libido looked at Rational Scully 
as if considering her words then having lulled Rational 
Scully into a moment’s complacency Scully’s Libido 
dashed round her and started to dig at the stake 
holding Mulder’s Libido chained. Mulder’s Libido 
had other plans however, it didn’t care if it was 
chained so long as Scully’s Libido was close enough 
to touch, lick, nip, frolic and play. 

Rational Mulder saw his libido out of control again. 
Well he could try and break this up or he could just 
adjust to the new rules. He’d just have to accept this 
overwhelming attraction he had to Scully and while it 
was new and exciting he was going to have trouble 
controlling it. He laughed at the irony of new and 
control, there was nothing new about his attraction to 
Scully and he’d been controlling it for years. He just 
couldn’t fight two libidos. Well if you couldn’t beat 
them might as well join them. At least he might stop 
his libido getting its ass kicked again.

Some time later the libidos lay collapsed side by side. 
Mulder’s Libido was at least the right way up this time 
but it was panting heavily and was too tired to raise its 
ears let alone its head. And this time Scully’s Libido 
was at least looking tired although she did have her 
head raised and the tip of her tail could still manage a 
wag. She was looking a lot sleeker now but she still 
had loads of stored energy. Rational Scully looked on. 
She was somewhat disconcerted by what she saw. 
Although she’d had no control over the libido she had 
been secretly proud of the fact that it had stuffed 
Mulder’s Libido. Twice. But now Mulder’s Libido 
had reinforcements. Well two could play at that game. 
Next time…. Oh God next time.

It would happen again, there was no use trying to deny 
it. Unless she was prepared to pack it all in and move 
to the other side of the country. She ran that through 
her head a couple of times, no, not going to happen. 
There was going to be a next time, and another and 
another. So time to scheme. Scully swam towards the 
deep end, the water felt wonderful.

“Mulder we’re not solving anything here.” 

Somehow they’d ended up on her bed, soaking wet 
she might add. 

“Oh I don’t know Scully. I guess we’ve established 
that we are sexually compatible” he grinned at her. 

“Mulder…” 

“Scully, we’ll work it out. We always do. We’ve been 
friends, close friends for years. We know how. And 
I’m ready, able and willing.” 

She gave him a sceptical look. 

“Well not quite this minute, but I love you, I want this 
to work, I need this to work. Do we really need to go 
through everything point by point?” 

“Mulder… it’s just that, well some things will change 
and I know that’s not necessarily a bad thing but there 
are things you do that I can accept as part of a 
friendship but which I would find difficult to cope 
with in a more intimate relationship.” 

He looked questioningly at her. 

“You know I’m a private person, but to do this I have 
to open up more, I’m more vulnerable… you could… 
you might…”

“It would be very easy for either of us to hurt the 
other, we know enough, we are close enough and 
sometimes we will despite our best intentions. Now I 
know you know that I would never hurt you 
deliberately, so you must  be thinking of something I 
might do impulsively?”

She nodded. 

“I can’t change my nature Scully.” 

“I know.”

 “I can control it… occasionally.” 

They both smiled at that. 

“There are times I’m going to do something that pisses 
you off, despite how hard I try to remember I now 
have responsibilities other than to myself. And no 
doubt we’ll argue, especially to start with as we both 
jockey for our own space but you can call me on it 
Scully. You can even set me penance.” 

At her raised eyebrow. 

“So long as it involves make up sex. I succumb to 
your domestic despotism and submit to whatever 
forfeits you give me,” he teased.  

She narrowed her eyes at him but inwardly sighed. He 
was right they’d just have to suck it and see, now 
there’s a thought. And the make up sex - oh the 
possibilities, however she kept her face neutral as she 
said. 

“In that case, as we don’t have a kennel, it’ll have to 
be a month’s worth of laundry. And I believe you 
were about to slave over dinner while I have a long 
leisurely relaxing bath.”

His shoulders slumped and his face dropped but his 
eyes still twinkled. He got up and slouched towards 
the door saying 

“Condemned to a life of culinary drudgery.” 

The hairbrush caught him on the ass as he walked out. 
He yelped and turned back towards her narrowing his 
eyes. 

“And don’t put your clothes back on just wear the 
frilly apron.” 

He picked up the hairbrush and stalked towards her. 

“Mulder…” she said warningly “You said you’d 
accept the penance.” 

She tried to dodge round him as he rushed her but his 
arms were too long. She squealed as he caught her 
round the waist, hugging her to him. 

“Mulder let me go!” she squirmed. 

“Should we be discussing disciple relationships 
Scully?” he said waving the hairbrush in front of her 
face. 

“No!” she wriggled and squirmed to get away from 
him. 

“Let me go Mulder or so help me I’ll hurt you! And 
you’re supposed to be submitting to my will.” 

“True, but I did say I was bound to do things wrong in 
the beginning. It’ll give you chance to test your 
penance setting abilities.” 

He dropped to the bed bending Scully over his knee in 
one fluid movement. There was an ear shattering 
squeal.

 “Mulder don’t you dare!” she threatened, then 
realised that was a mistake. 

“You’re daring me Scully?” he said stroking a hand 
over her buttocks. He knew he was taking his life in 
his hands if Scully took this seriously, he was praying 
her sense of humour would assert itself.

“No. No let me go you great…” 

He patted her bottom in a warning gesture. 

“But you have such a tempting butt Scully.” he ran his 
hand over her again before bringing her upright and 
setting her on her knees beside him. 

“Kiss and makeup?” he grinned mischievously. 

Scully scowled indignantly then caught up with the 
moment. They’d been so tense and serious around 
each other. There was more to life than that. There 
were teasing, happy moments, there’d be soft, gentle 
loving moments, frenzied passionate moments, angry 
screaming moments, pissed off irritated moments and 
just plain common or garden peaceful content 
moments. She smiled as she leaned in to kiss him. 

“Okay.” It was easy really, she just had to believe! 

The End part 5 of 5

Author’s note: The quote 

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.

I love thee to the level of everyday's 
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right; 
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise. 

I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith. 
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose 
With my lost saints,--I love thee with the breath, 
Smiles, tears, of all my life!--and, if God choose, 
I shall but love thee better after death. 

How do I Love Thee? Elizabeth Barrett Browning 
(1770-1850)