Title: Rampaging Libido 
Date: January 2002
Author: The Pimpernel
Rating: At a guess PG13 for bad words, sexual 
situations.
Summary: Our heroes with no control – never happen.

Classification:  SRH
Keywords: MSR PWP - fluff
Spoilers:  Anything’s fair game up to season 8.
Feedback: I’d be stunned but if you want to I promise 
to reply when I’ve picked the keyboard up off the 
floor. - thepimpernel@waitrose.com
Archive: I’d be even more stunned but go ahead. It’s 
written to be read.
Disclaimer: Fanfic is a self indulgence of the non 
fattening type for neither body nor bank account.
In other words any reference to characters created by 
Chris Carter real or imaginary is purely deliberate but 
they’re not mine. 

Part 1 of 5

“I think we should get married Scully.”

Her heart, usually a most reliable organ, despite abuse 
in the past best skimmed over at this moment, was 
behaving in a very uncharacteristic way. First it leapt 
into her throat creating a tight restriction before 
plummeting back down to her chest where it started 
thumping so forcefully she felt breathless and 
somewhat flushed. The reason for this uncharacteristic 
response was not so much what he said but that he 
meant it, not as a backhand compliment to something 
she'd said but actually meant it. Then she was annoyed 
that he would treat something that he knew she would 
take seriously so cavalierly. 

He must have seen the indignation on her face because 
before she could get a word out he continued with

“This isn’t just for Paul, although he may be the 
catalyst. If he was the only reason I wouldn’t be 
asking.” Alright so not cavalierly but maybe 
conveniently.

“What reasons Mulder because from where I’m 
standing this sounds like your own self interest here?”

Mulder was the one now astounded. “No. No, how 
could you even think that!”

“It’s probably got something to do with the fact that 
we have never thought about… a personal relationship 
let alone marriage with each other before this 
conversation and given the circumstances you are 
going for the most convenient solution.” Her voice 
was strained as she tried to keep control.

“That’s not true for either statement.”

“What!” was surprised out of her.

He looked resigned for a moment before letting out a 
sigh.

“I am ruefully aware that your sentiments are 
glaringly different from my own and under most 
circumstances I keep my own feelings carefully 
wrapped to…. for various reasons. But I think that I 
have expressed my own feelings more than once.“

Scully looked  slightly uncomfortable shifting her 
weight from foot to foot, her mouth opened a little in 
surprise but no words came out. He watched her for a 
minute then quoted

“How I do love thee, let me count the ways. I love 
thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can 
reach...”

She crossed her arms and pursed her lips giving all the 
signals of an unimpressed Scully.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He was in 
earnest but she was right he’d never seriously 
considered marriage before basically because he knew 
that she didn’t regard him as husband material. Oh, 
she cared about him; was fond of him; respected him; 
considered him her friend; forgave him his trespasses; 
defended and protected him when he needed it; 
administered medical care or kicked his ass as and 
when required; encouraged or challenged him as 
appropriate; was everything he could expect from a 
long term partner and friend. However some where 
along the way, probably early in their partnership he’d 
obviously failed her criteria for life partner and Scully 
had filed him away in her mind as ‘friend’. Well he 
had been married to his work, obsessed with his 
search for his sister; he’d told her as much after all and 
he wouldn’t even think of all the less favourable 
personal habits he sometimes displayed. He found 
himself shaking his head, internally, no point chasing 
these thoughts at the moment.

Having made her diagnosis and being a creature of 
habit, every time something changed in their 
relationship or something eventful happened to them 
Scully added to her Mulder file but there at the front 
was ‘friend’ and that’s where he stayed. Most of the 
time it was enough because most of the time he agreed 
with her.

Their widely varying characters worked wonderfully 
for the job but as a couple it could very well be 
disastrous, not that that stopped him from occasionally 
trying to break into that file and remove the offending 
classification. He had these impulsive tendencies with 
flights of fantasy about how they might become a 
loving couple, perhaps fortunately he’d never 
succeeded in being reclassified in Scully’s mind 
because most of the time he jealously guarded what 
they already had and wasn’t prepared to risk 
everything. He snorted at that little irony, almost a 
change of habit for him, that must be Scully rubbing 
off on him.

Now though there had been a change in circumstances 
and he needed her to re-evaluate him for active 
husband duties. He’d had time to think about this and 
had decided this was the best way to go. Making the 
commitment wasn’t really the problem, making the 
compromises was going to be more difficult but he 
was ready to negotiate. However, he had hit Scully 
with this out of the blue. He’d meant to try and lead up 
to it but there wasn’t really an indirect way to 
approach it, so in the end he’d just gone for the 
straightforward approach and hoped to convince 
Scully that it was a good idea. Unfortunately nobody 
just planted ideas in Scully’s head, which was usually 
a good thing despite how aggravating it could be at 
times, they had to be presented for review with lots of 
supportive data. She would need proof that this was a 
viable plan, that he loved her, that a marriage between 
them would work. And how did you provide proof for 
emotional arguments? He tried not to think about her 
breaking out into hysterical laughter and giggling all 
the way home.

He’d tried to approach this from Scully’s mind set, 
logically, with a rational argument at each step. 
Marriage was a practical solution to several 
problems, not just his, although he must admit it was 
his current dilemma that had triggered his proposal. 
But not the only reason, he wasn’t that mercenary or  
that manipulative or that shallow. He wasn’t. But first 
things first he needed to get her to go to the Mulder 
file in her head and reanalyse every bit of empirical 
data she had about him and get himself reclassified as 
at least a possibility. No need to aim for the 
impossible at this point just go for a minor miracle. If 
he got that far he could then work towards the 
definitely. 

“Let me try to explain this logically.” he tried.

“Logically Mulder? Marriage isn’t about logic, it’s 
about couples who are in love agreeing to spend their 
whole life together. It’s…”

He put he hand up to interrupt her.

“ Love isn’t always enough. Marriage needs 
teamwork, compromises, respect and commitment.”

He looked at her for confirmation and she nodded.

“It needs compatibility, trust, shared interests and 
plain old affection.”

“Yees” she agreed cautiously expecting Mulder to be 
leading her into some carefully phrased word trap.

“I think we have all those things and more Scully.”

“Compatibility?” she said in amazed amusement. 
“Mulder we’d kill each other.  Remember how we 
were in Arcadia. At a basic level I’m ordered and 
you’re a slob. A bone of contention before we even 
start.”

Mulder convinced himself that this was good, at least 
they were discussing it, just keep it going.

“Some of that’s just habit Scully. I’m a forty year old 
bachelor living on my own, there’s no reason for me 
to remember to put the toilet seat down. Anyway in 
our equal opportunities society why doesn’t the 
woman leave the toilet seat up?”

Moving quickly on as Scully didn’t look impressed 
with that argument.

“And sure squeezing the toothpaste from the bottom is 
not natural to my slobby mind but with the new 
materials they are made from these days it’s not so 
much of a problem and if it really bothers you we’ll 
buy a pump action one....”

“Yeah, so you can let it drip on the counter. You’re 
just generally messy Mulder.”

“We can compromise…” 

“Oh can we!”

“I am prepared to make concessions and succumb to 
domestic tyranny… I mean bliss for the right 
incentive.” He smiled suggestively at her but before 
she could comment he continued with

“And I guess that Paul is a good incentive. On the 
other hand, you don’t have to be so rigid about being 
neat and tidy. I can learn new habits Scully, put my 
clothes in the laundry basket especially if I get 
rewarded for my good behaviour.”

“Rewarded?”

“Home cooked meal, a kiss, sexual favours for a really 
shipshape effort.”

“Sexual favours?” she parroted. 

What happened to her verbal skills, maybe her brain 
and heart had swapped positions, neither was 
behaving reliably.  Mulder gulped, he’d been on a roll 
and that had slipped out. Maybe he’d mentioned sex a 
bit early in the conversation, should have held that 
back. Still now it was out…

“Works both ways Scully. You get sexual favours for 
ignoring a messy pile of sun flower seed husks.”

“Oh do I?”

“You don’t want sexual favours?” 

A part of Scully’s anatomy she thought might have 
atrophied suddenly twitched into life. Great now 
another organ was behaving erratically she thought.

“Yes.” Slipped out quietly before her brain was 
engaged. “No!” she stated more forcefully. 

“You don’t think sex would be part of our marriage?”

“No.” she returned meaning the marriage not the sex 
but getting the conversation and the subplot 
momentarily confused. 

“Oh.” His shoulders slumped and a general air of 
disappointment came over him. “Well I suppose I’ve 
managed without this long, a few more years wont kill 
me… as I get over forty I guess I’ll start to lose 
interest right?”  

“Mulder….” Her arm waved aimless in the air as she 
sought for words. “How did we even get on to this 
subject?”

“Because it’s the easiest.” he replied simply.

“The easiest?” Oh good, parrot mode again.

“Yes. All the other personnel subjects that need to be 
discussed are private, emotional, intimately revealing. 
Sex, although it can be all those things can be 
discussed at a purely physical level.”

This conversation feels surreal thought Scully. It 
seemed to have developed a life of it’s own and was 
charging onward completely beyond control or 
direction. She felt completely at sea having been 
swept unexpectedly off the beach by a huge wave. She 
saw that Mulder was about to speak again and she 
held her hand up.

“Mulder just stop a minute. I need some processing 
time here.” 

He nodded in acknowledgement and she went to flop 
down on a chair, rested her head back and closed her 
eyes. She tried to calm her rampaging endocrine 
system, swirling thoughts and general confusion. She 
cast her mind back a few weeks to give herself a sense 
of perspective.

A few weeks ago everything was normal. She snorted, 
well as normal as it ever was for someone who 
investigated paranormal phenomena. They had just 
finished a case and were loading their bags into the car 
when Mulder’s mobile phone rang. When the 
conversation ended Mulder had a perplexed and 
apologetic look on his face. ‘Another case?’ she’d 
asked dispiritedly, she really would have liked to go 
home after nearly three weeks on this case. ‘No. Not a 
case, at least I don’t think so but we need to detour via 
the hospital.’ She’d looked quizzically at him. ‘Some 
woman called Elizabeth Roberts has been trying to 
reach me. She left a message with the bureau 
apologising for using the FBI to relay a personal 
message but that it was urgent. She’s asking me to 
visit her in the hospital which just happens to be in 
this town. Does that seem a bit odd to you Scully?’ 
‘Do you know this woman?’ He’d shaken his head 
‘No, not that I know of.’ ‘Maybe it’s a fan of yours 
from the internet, heard you were in town and just 
wanted to meet the great man himself’ she had said 
dryly. He’d narrowed his eyes at her but let it go and 
they’d gone to the hospital anyway.

They had found Mrs Roberts’ room, knocked and 
entered. Mrs Roberts had first looked at them 
enquiringly, then as Mulder had started to introduce 
them, she had looked Mulder up and down, smiled and 
said ‘Well Hello Fox. Long time no see but I’d 
recognise you anywhere. You’ve matured a bit but 
you’ve still got that distinctive face with the adorable 
eyes and kissable lips.’ Scully had automatically 
glanced at Mulder. He’d looked sour when she called 
him Fox but there was no sign of recognition on his 
face. He began to look positively alarmed when she 
got a bit more personal.

The woman in the bed looked in her fifties, was 
carrying a substantial amount of weight, her hair was 
dyed a platinum blonde, her skin was decidedly 
wrinkled despite the makeup trowelled on to try to 
hide them. 

At Mulder’s confused look she had chuckled, causing 
her double chins to wobble. ‘You don’t remember me 
do you? I’d have sworn I was your first. You’d think 
even a man would remember his first wouldn’t you?’ 
she’d asked Scully melodramatically. 

Mulder had looked aghast, then recognition had 
dawned and he’d gone from aghast to astonished. 
‘Lizzy Norton?’ he’d spluttered out. 

‘Ahh you do remember me.’ she’d said meaningfully. 
Mulder had blushed and tried not to catch Scully’s eye 
which meant he had to continue to look at Mrs 
Roberts. ‘How gratifying. That will make this so much 
easier.’ she’d continued smoothly. 

At this point Scully was feeling somewhat amused, 
Mulder was embarrassed but there was nothing nasty 
here. Presumably some youthful folly with which she 
could tease him later, good naturedly of course. 

‘Make what easier?’ he’d asked. 

Mrs Roberts had actually paused at that but then 
launched herself into the fray ‘I have neither time or 
the inclination to be tactful or diplomatic here, so I 
apologise in advance for being blunt.’ She’d paused 
looking at Scully before speaking to Mulder again. 
‘Having said that, this is personal to you Fox. Is it okay 
for your partner to hear?’ Mulder had looked 
uncomfortable for a moment then nodded his head 
slightly. Scully had asked him if he was sure, teasing 
him was one thing invading his privacy another. In the 
event it was probably as well she was there, it meant 
he didn’t have to explain it later. 

‘Right then. Fox you have a daughter and are about to 
become a grandfather.’ Mrs Roberts stated baldly. 

To say Mulder was stunned was severely 
underestimating his level of shock. Whatever he might 
have conjectured he wasn’t even close. He was 
shocked practically speechless, his notable powers of 
oratory deserting him. ‘What!?’ was all he managed.  

‘Our… liaison of over twenty years ago resulted in a child, 
a little girl. That little girl is all grown up and 
pregnant. Unfortunately there have been some 
complications... Complications such that I have no 
option but to call on the father from whom I have kept 
a daughter’s existence a secret for so many years.’ 

‘I don’t believe you.’ 

‘I didn’t expect you to even though she bears a 
remarkable resemblance to you’ she replied reaching 
to ring the bell ‘so I arranged DNA testing so you can 
check for yourself.’ 

When the nurse poked her head round the door Mrs 
Roberts asked her to page Dr Jones and for him to 
bring the data with him. By this time Mulder was 
beginning to look severely annoyed. Mrs Roberts 
forestalled any outburst. ‘I’ll explain it all Fox, just 
give me a few minutes.’ He didn’t nod but she took 
his silence for acquiescence. ‘I was due to be married 
the week after I left my aunt’s. I swore to myself that 
I’d be faithful to my husband after we were married 
but when I saw you that weekend looking so cute and 
adorable I just had to give myself a little gift before I 
assigned myself over for life to Donald. It wasn’t as if 
you were my first… Now more than twenty years 
later, four husbands and several lovers later it’s just a 
fond memory. But I do remember you with fondness, 
not like some of the others who have fortunately faded 
into the bin of losers in my mind. Anyway I found out 
I was pregnant a few weeks later by which time I was 
married to Donald. He accepted her as his and I never 
saw any reason to tell him otherwise. Sarah had a 
father, she was provided for, it would just have stirred 
up trouble. He doted on her, thought of her as his little 
princess. I admit it prayed on my mind a bit but when 
he was killed in a car crash two years later I was glad 
I’d never told him because he’d had all that joy for 
two years. In the subsequent years we never lacked for 
money, all my husbands unconditionally accepted 
Sarah as their stepdaughter.’ Mrs Roberts had to pause 
as a coughing bout over took her. 

As she calmed her breathing Mulder piped in with 
‘You didn’t think that I might have wanted to know?’ 

‘Fox, you were young just on your way to University. 
What would you have wanted with a baby? She was 
lavished with love and affection, she was healthy. She 
didn’t miss out from not knowing who her biological 
father was. I saw no need to upset the apple cart.’ 

‘So what’s changed now. Some medical complication 
and I’m needed to donate a kidney?’ he spat out. 

Mrs Roberts’ face creased in consternation. ‘It’s… it’s 
more… it could be viewed as more serious than that.’ 

‘Do go on.’ he’d said sarcastically. 

‘Sarah is in a coma. She’s not expected to recover. 
The medical staff have her on life support trying to give 
the baby a chance of survival.’ she said with a hitch in 
her voice. ‘Sarah took a drug overdose. The baby is 
expected to have withdrawal problems and possible 
medical complications. The doctors’ report that the 
baby is likely to become stressed shortly and decisions 
need to be made about what actions to take. On top of 
which…. I have lived my life to the full, over indulged 
in everything, shopping, cigarettes, alcohol and sex. 
I’m dying and all my money comes from trusts and 
allowances, there will be nothing to leave for my 
daughter or grandchild. Sarah doesn’t have any 
medical cover. That leaves a baby with compromised 
health in a vulnerable position. To put it bluntly, I’m 
expecting that you’ve got family medical insurance 
cover or that your family can stump up the money for 
your grandchild’s medical needs.’ 

Whatever Mulder was about to say was cut short as 
the doctor walked in. There had been an 
uncomfortable exchange of pleasantries then the 
doctor had waded straight in with ‘So you are Sarah’s 
father?’ Mulder had replied that he had yet to be 
convinced of any such thing, he was probably thinking 
it was some convoluted plot by the consortium. The 
doctor accepted that Mulder would need some time to 
confirm the DNA analysis and have his own done but 
somehow managed to convince him to see Sarah. He 
wanted to discuss the medical details so that Mulder 
could begin weighing the implications while he was 
waiting for test results and be prepared to take the 
decisions when the results came through. The doctor 
was obviously convinced that Mulder was the father to 
be discussing private medical matters and once they 
went to see Sarah, Scully could understand why. 
There were some remarkable similarities. Mulder 
seemed overwhelmed, a strange state for him. 

When the doctor started discussing the medical details 
Mulder had interrupted turning to Scully and saying 
’Scully I can’t…. I need a breather… will you do this 
for me?’ he’d asked waving his hand vaguely at Sarah 
and the life support equipment. 

‘Of course Mulder’ she’d replied and he turned and 
left the room. Scully had been confused and concerned 
at what was going on and Mulder’s reaction, whether 
they should even be doing this, but assess and collate 
the medical facts she could do. If she was going to 
have to advise Mulder later then she needed all the 
information she could get. She’d asked about the 
baby’s father, shouldn’t he be here making these 
decisions. The father was apparently unknown, Mrs 
Roberts had not even known Sarah was pregnant when 
she overdosed and was unaware of anyone special in 
her daughter’s life. This had all come as a bit of a 
shock to Mrs Roberts, she thought her daughter was 
doing well at college, had nice friends not in with the 
drink and drug crowd. Mrs Roberts health, which was 
already compromised, had taken a nose dive when all 
this blew up although she now seemed to be coping 
well mentally she was given only a few weeks to live. 
Scully could empathise with Mrs Roberts’ need to 
provide for her grandchild but to pick out Mulder after 
all these years seemed a bit calculated. Scully felt sure 
that Sarah must be Mrs Roberts’ first husband’s child 
and Sarah’s physical similarities to Mulder were pure 
coincidence.

She found Mulder slumped in a chair in the hallway. 
She thought he might have been back questioning Mrs 
Roberts but it looked like he’d been sat here all the 
time she had been with the doctor. ‘Mulder can I ask 
you a personal question?’ He’d looked up at her and 
shrugged a sure. ‘Did you have… I mean is there a 
possibility Sarah is your child?’ Jesus how did you ask 
your partner of seven years if he’d had unprotected 
sex as a teenager. 

Mulder had sighed and looked down at his feet before 
smiling ruefully and replying ‘Scully would you 
believe me if I said I was trying to remember. Come 
on I’ll take you to lunch. I’m going to be embarrassed 
explaining this and I’m not going to do it in a hospital 
corridor.’ 

‘You don’t have to explain Mulder...’ 

‘I’m not sure yet if this is entirely personal, someone 
having a joke at my expense or a wider conspiracy 
Scully, but something tells me I’m going to need you 
on this.’ The last part he’d emphasised as a question. 
It didn’t cross her mind to refuse she only thought to 
spare him some emotional turmoil. ‘So I’ll give you 
all the gory details over lunch.’ 

Scully sighed a bit internally, didn’t look like they 
were going home today but she didn’t dwell on it, 
Mulder was more important. Instead she’d returned 
‘All the gory details? Can’t you summarise?’ He’d 
leered at her then ‘What. You don’t want to live 
vicariously through my past love life?’ Ahh down but 
not out. She quirked an eyebrow at him but before she 
could respond he’d followed with ‘Don’t answer that.’ 
Spoilsport she thought as she proceeded him out the 
building.

End part 1 of 5