Title: SWEET LOVE

Author: Candy Apple

Email: blair_lady@yahoo.com

Website: https://www.squidge.org/~candy_a

Direct to Nip/Tuck Page: https://www.squidge.org/~candy_a/NTPage.htm

Permission to archive: Yes

Fandom(s): Nip/Tuck

Genre: Slash

Pairing/Characters: Sean/Christian

Rating: FRAO

Summary: Sean's and Christian's first date reaches its conclusion, Christian makes a decision about his relationship with Kimber, and Matt is confronted by his two fathers.

Warnings: Sex. (Is that a warning or a promise?) Language consistent with Nip/Tuck.

Notes: This story only takes into account canon through the Granville Trapp episode. It is a sequel to "The Night and the Music." I don't own the song "Sweet Love" or I probably could have quit my day job by now.

***********************

SWEET LOVE

by

Candy Apple

//Your heart has called me closer to you

I will be all that you need

Just trust in what we're feeling

Never leave 'cause, baby, I believe in this love,

Sweet love...//

Christian brought the car to a stop in the driveway in front of Sean's house. Both men sat there a few seconds, silent. Chiding himself for letting the moment be so awkward, Christian turned off the engine.

"Are you going to invite me in?" he asked.

"Sure, if you want," Sean responded, his tone innocent and neutral, as if they hadn't just been tonguing each other's tonsils in a gay club an hour ago. He was either that relaxed and trusting even with the shift in their relationship, or he was using that approach to lure Christian inside to have his way with him. In any event, Christian was game to give it a try.

Sean unlocked the door and they entered.

"You want a beer or anything?" Sean asked, taking out a water for himself.

"Water's good. I think I had enough to drink if we've got a surgery on the books before noon."

Sean took out the second water and handed it to Christian. There was a long, awkward silence as they stood in the kitchen.

"This is ridiculous," Sean said, shaking his head. "What do we have to be so uneasy about?"

"Things are changing between us, whether we want them to or not. I don't think it's a matter of choice anymore." Christian took a drink of his water. "This whole thing is...new to me."

"I know being with a man is new, but how is dating someone anything new? It's not like either one of us are monks."

"I never loved someone first and then took her out on a date. The date was always about getting into her pants. And how much fun I had when I got there determined how I felt about her in the long run - - whether I asked her out again. I'm not used to taking it slow."

"I want to know if we're doing the right thing or if we're destroying our friendship. I want to know if I should trust what I feel. I want to know if this is an experiment that's going to end badly," Sean said, his face troubled. Then, he finally admitted, "Besides all that, I really just want to kiss you again." He finally looked up at Christian, looking horribly self-conscious, and more than a little nervous.

Christian closed the small distance between them and inclined his head toward Sean, as Sean did the same. Their lips met and pressed against each other, then their arms slid around each other's bodies and mouths opened, the kiss deepening. Christian wasn't quite prepared for the surge of desire he felt from Sean, a growing hardness between them, Sean's hands grabbing his shirt and pulling it out of his pants, then sliding under it, up his back. If he'd been a woman with long nails, he'd have left fiery trails in Christian's skin. As it was, everywhere the eager fingers touched seemed to burn in their wake.

Finished being responsible or conservative, Christian pushed Sean's jacket off his shoulders and when it had fallen to the floor, worked the buttons of Sean's shirt, never allowing their mouths to separate. He managed to pull Sean's shirt off one shoulder and partway down his arm before Sean ceased cooperating and went back to pulling at Christian's shirt. Faced with a bared neck and shoulder, Christian left Sean's mouth and moved to his neck, sucking and kissing his way toward Sean's shoulder.

"Bedroom," Sean gasped before Christian covered his mouth again, thrusting his tongue deep inside.

They stumbled a bit awkwardly and very hastily into the bedroom, falling onto the bed, still tugging at stubborn clothing, kicking off shoes, and all the while barely missing a beat in their hungry shared kisses. Lying atop Sean, Christian finally came up for air and looked into Sean's eyes. There was a little wonder there, a little fear, but more than anything else, there was love, and there was that something special that Christian always saw in Sean's eyes, just for him.

"I love you, you know," Christian said, unable to resist holding that eye contact a bit longer.

"I know," Sean replied, laying his hand on Christian's cheek. "I love you even more than I thought I did," he admitted, smiling when Christian pressed Sean's hand closer against his cheek. "I spent half an hour picking out the right shirt," he said, and Christian laughed out loud then, appreciating the thought but glad the shirt was in a pile next to the bed, and he was able to feel Sean's skin pressed against his.

"Is this okay?" he asked, one hand on Sean's belt buckle.

"It's better than okay. No limits," Sean added.

"No limits," Christian agreed, before divesting Sean of his pants and boxers in one smooth move. He didn't offer Sean any resistance when he returned the favor, and they were finally able to lie there together, struggling to get as much skin against skin as possible.

Christian found himself smiling into the eager kisses they were sharing as their legs tangled together and their hands explored places off-limits among friends. Even Sean's hand sliding over his hip, fingertips skimming near the seam of his buttocks on its journey down to the back of his thigh didn't unnerve him the way he feared it would. Sean was making love to him everywhere he could reach, and noplace in particular.

Sean's mouth found Christian's nipple, licking and sucking it, startling him with the intensity of the sensation. He reached down and gripped Sean's semi-hard cock, pumping it, loving the way Sean's head tilted back as he gasped, his heart touched by a stray tear that was trickling from the corner of Sean's eye. He kissed it away, pressing his forehead against Sean's for a moment, waiting to share a gaze, then smiling until Sean smiled back. All that distracted Christian from that wonderful moment was Sean's hand wrapping around his cock, mirroring the pumping motion his own hand was making.

The physical sensations were intense and amazing, and all the love he'd felt was missing in all the years of cheap encounters was right there, shining back at him from two moist blue eyes. He felt himself heading for an explosive climax, and he didn't try to resist it or prolong it. He found himself actually looking forward to the afterglow, when he could concentrate on holding Sean close and sealing this new connection with as much love as he could show him.

Sean surprised him by coming first, the sounds he made a combination of pleasured gasps and little sobs, as if the intimacy was something he'd almost physically needed and had been denied too long. Watching Sean come was more than Christian could take without joining him, crying out as he bathed Sean's hand.

When their shared climax had passed, Christian pulled Sean into an almost desperate embrace, wanting to be so close that they nearly melted into one body. He loved the feeling of his lover's embrace matching his own strength. It was an amazing thing to hold and be held at the same time, to not be quite certain who was holding whom, and not caring. He wanted to share that thought with Sean, to tell him everything he felt, the way he did about so many things, but the words just weren't there.

"I love you, Christian," Sean said, his voice hushed and a little muffled against Christian's neck. "It's always been you," he added. Christian hugged him impossibly tighter, unable to respond with anything but kisses, on Sean's cheek, his neck, his shoulder.

"Just so you know," he finally said, his voice husky, "I've loved you the most, too, always."

Sean pulled back just far enough for their lips to meet again, to share long, deep kisses that were expressions of their love, and wonderful ends in themselves as their bodies cooled and hearts settled into a shared beat for sleep.

********

Sean opened his eyes, and for a moment, his heart sank when his questing hand skimmed nothing but cooling sheets. It was still dark, about four in the morning according to the clock on the night stand. It was comfortable in the room, but his body felt cold without Christian's next to it, wrapped around it the way they'd been when they drifted off to sleep. He closed his eyes for a moment, afraid to call to Christian and be greeted with the silence of an empty house.

His fears were dispelled a moment later when Christian walked back into the room, his smile visible in the shadowy gray moonlight. He climbed into bed and wrapped his arms around Sean, rolling them so he was atop his partner.

"Why the grim expression?" he asked, before kissing Sean and delaying his answer.

"No reason," Sean lied, smiling now.

"Did you think I had left, when you woke up and I wasn't in bed?"

"I thought maybe you came to your senses and went home to Kimber," Sean said, trying to keep his tone light, though there was nothing light in the fear he felt that it would someday happen, and Kimber, being the forgiving soul she was, would take Christian back in a heartbeat.

"Why would you think that? That I'd just sneak out and leave you here?"

"I suppose it was the worst thing I could think of happening," Sean admitted, still worried that when Christian realized what this all meant in the cold light of reality, he'd find himself alone again, trying to claw his way out of a pit of depression that seemed dark and bottomless. "I've gotten a little pessimistic lately when it comes to my love life...or lack thereof."

"I guess I've got my work cut out for me then, convincing you that I'm not going anywhere."

"It's not you. It's me," Sean said, smiling faintly.

"You could just as well be the one to figure out this isn't what you want. We're both taking a risk here."

"You're not taking any risks, Christian. I'm not going anywhere. I've been here for twenty years."

"It took me twenty years to really see you. I'm not going to throw it all away now," Christian said, grinning devilishly, before kissing his way down Sean's chest, his hands stroking Sean's hips and thighs as he moved downward.

"Christian - - " Sean began, but one of Christian's large hands covered his mouth.

"Shh."

The hand moved away from his mouth and back down his side to his hip and then down his thigh as Christian moved into position between his legs. Sean moaned and relaxed on the bed as Christian began kissing the insides of his thighs, moving up to his groin, the feather-light touches driving him mad as they teased the base of his cock.

Sean had to raise up so he could see Christian. He had to be sure he wasn't dreaming, that he was really seeing Christian there, that the sensations of Christian's lips on the skin in his most sensitive places weren't part of some cruel dream or illusion that would shatter with the shrill intrusion of the alarm clock. Christian paused for a moment and held Sean's gaze. Then, with the hint of a smile, he engulfed Sean's cock in his mouth.

"Oh, God," Sean gasped, grabbing the sheets. His body was needier than he expected it to be, and the emotions that seemed to rise to the surface by someone making love to him this way warred for dominance with the physical sensations.

He knew there were tears on his cheeks, that he was moaning and muttering nonsensical things, that part of him just wanted Christian to hold him while the other part greedily took in every second of the sexual ecstasy he was feeling. He came way too soon, regretting that he couldn't hold off the inevitable to preserve the incredible moment, and all that it meant, just a while longer.

Christian moved up next to him and pulled him close, whispering against his ear.

"Go to sleep, sweetheart. I'll still be here when you wake up."

Sean knew there was so much he should say, that what had just happened between them was... life-altering. But the feeling of being held and treasured, his body wrapped up with the body of the person he'd always loved most, was so intoxicating that he just let himself drift, savoring the warm contact of skin against skin, and the feeling of being completely loved and utterly desired.

********

Christian looked across the table at Kimber. She was blonde, beautiful, fashionable, and she'd turned several heads when she hurried into the elegant restaurant to meet him for lunch. He took another drink of his wine, wondering if he was insane. She was exactly what he wanted - - or should want - - and yet all he was thinking about was getting Sean alone again. His cock twitched a bit at the sight of Kimber and the hint of cleavage visible in the neckline of the two-piece suit she wore. Maybe his cock was smarter than he was. Maybe it knew he couldn't give up a generous pair of surgically perfected breasts for a flat, hairy chest and morning stubble. And yet, when she'd kissed him before sitting down, he'd almost recoiled because the lips that touched his weren't Sean's.

"Sorry I'm late," she said, all smiles. "We did ten takes just to get this one scene right, and I couldn't leave until we wrapped it."

"It's okay," he said, returning the smile. "You're not that late." He poured her a glass of wine.

"This is such a nice surprise," she said, looking around at their elegant surroundings. "I don't think you've ever invited me to lunch before just out of the blue like this. I admit I was beginning to get a little worried with you staying out all night, and then making excuses to do it again. I still don't know what you were doing."

"I told you I was with Sean," he said. And it was the truth. Both times.

"At least I don't have to be jealous, then. But why were you staying over with Sean? Is he okay?"

"He's fine," Christian said. "Well, not fine exactly. He's been going through some rough times with Matt, family stuff."

"It's so good of you to be there for him like that," she said sincerely, touching Christian's hand where it rested on the table. "You're such a good friend."

"Kimber, there's no easy way to say this."

"What?" she asked, immediately, frowning. She slowly withdrew her hand.

"There's someone else."

"I don't understand. You just got done telling me that you spent those nights with Sean."

"I know." He looked up at Kimber. "I asked Sean out last night."

"Okay, so what?"

"I asked him out on a date. I took him to a nice restaurant, we went dancing at a gay club, and then we went back to his place and I spent the night with him."

"Just wait a minute," she said, a sour little laugh of disbelief tumbling out with the words. "You're not gay. I know Sean might not be as...active as you are, but he's definitely not gay either. I can attest to that."

"Kimber, I'm in love with him."

"You can't be in love with him. He's your best friend. You're not gay. How can you be in love with him?" she asked, her composure starting to crack just a little. Her voice was rising just enough to make Christian uneasy.

"I don't know," he said, honestly. "I just know how I feel, and I don't want to sneak around anymore. I want to spend time with him, and I want to explore this feeling and follow it wherever it leads."

"You've had sex with him?" she asked, pinning Christian with an intense gaze. When he looked away, she smiled and shook her head. "I don't know what's going on here, but I do know that you'll be back. You're not good at celibacy, Christian. Not even for Sean."

"Who said anything about celibacy? Besides, maybe it's the first time I trusted my heart instead of my dick when picking out someone to love."

"So with me, you were just following your dick?" she asked, her voice shaky. "I think that you're running away from me because you know that we were meant for each other, and we have a future together. You're running scared to Sean, but deep down, you know that for all he is to you, he can't give you the kind of orgasm that I can. You're trying to make yourself love him that way, too, so you can have it all in one safe little package. No marriage, no commitments. Just a handy buddy fuck when you need someone to scratch an itch for you."

"There's no need to get ugly about this, Kimber. This isn't about you. I only called you here because I thought you deserved an explanation - - "

"Oh, please! You invited me here because you were afraid to face me alone and you figured this fancy restaurant would stop me from making a scene."

"Considering you tied me to a bed and threatened to slice my nuts off the last time you got really angry, yes, I preferred not to cross you one-on-one again."

"I can't believe you brought that up." She picked up her purse and stood. "Sean can have you. I hope you'll be very happy together. I'll have my things out of the apartment this afternoon." She stormed out of the restaurant, turning heads again, only this time because of her dramatic exit.

********

Sean kept his concentration on the midday traffic, not really looking at Christian as he drove toward Matt's school. Still, Christian's mood had been more than a little odd since he'd come back from the errands he had to run at lunch.

"I broke up with Kimber," Christian said, finally, breaking the silence.

"I didn't want to pressure you into doing that," Sean responded, though a part of him was enormously relieved to hear that it had happened.

"You didn't. You didn't even bring it up." Christian looked over at Sean, who returned the look, now that they were at a stoplight. "You made love with me even when you thought I might get up and go home to her in the middle of the night."

"I didn't want you to be with me because you felt guilty we'd slept together and that you owed me. I want you with me because you want to be here."

"I want to be here, Sean." A honk from behind them prompted Sean to notice the light had changed, and he moved forward to the relief of the cars behind them.

"Thanks for doing this today. With Matt. Every time I talk to him one-on-one, it's a disaster. He gets rude and I get angry and nothing is accomplished."

"He's our son. I want to be involved."

Sean smiled at that response as he located a parking spot near the high school. At least Ms. Wentworth was used to dealing with both of Matt's fathers, so the two of them showing up together wouldn't require long, awkward explanations. The principal greeted them and showed them into her office, then made the necessary call to have Matt summoned from his class to meet with his fathers.

"Gee, this must be important," Matt said sarcastically as Ms. Wentworth escorted him into the office.

"I'll leave you three to talk," she said, taking her leave.

"It's about your sister, Matt. It's very important. When you refuse to return our calls, you leave us no choice," Sean said.

"What about Annie?" he asked, a little unnerved.

"I don't care how much hate you want to spout off at me, but when you start poisoning your sister against me and scaring her away from having a relationship with her father, you're not just hurting me. You're hurting her, and that's where this nonsense of yours is going to stop," Sean stated firmly.

"Nonsense? You did break my nose, *Dad*. That wasn't nonsense. It was the truth. I was just warning her not to piss you off."

"You know I never laid a hand on your sister. Before you decided to shove your mother across the room, I never laid a hand on you, either, even when you asked for it."

"Well there's a first time for everything, obviously. Social Services warned me that you'd try to threaten me. When I dropped the restraining order, one of the social workers contacted me and told me I shouldn't give in to threats or intimidation from my abuser."

"Sit down and shut up," Christian snapped, pointing at a chair in the office. "I have something I want to say to you, and you're going to listen."

"Or what? You'll hit me, too?"

Christian took a hold of the front of Matt's green army jacket and physically sat him in one of the chairs, then leaned on the arms of it, towering over him.

"Do you want to talk about child abuse, Matty? Because your father doesn't know the first thing about being an abusive bastard, and you don't know the first thing about what it's like to live with one. When you heard your father's footsteps in the hall in the middle of the night, the most you had to fear when he came into your room was that he'd kiss you goodnight or watch you sleep, because he loved you so much. After you've spent several years feeling sick from fear at those footsteps because you're not sure if you can satisfy him with a simple hand job or if this is a night you'll have to endure him raping your mouth or your ass before he lets you go back to sleep, you come back and talk to me about being abused! Try shaking and pissing yourself when you knock something over because you don't know whether you'll get his fists or the belt, or something worse. That's abuse, Matt. When you call your father an abuser, that's the company you're putting him in."

"Christian, that's enough," Sean said, touching his shoulder.

"I don't think it's anywhere near enough! You've spent your whole life feeling safe and loved and protected, and knowing that no matter how badly you fucked up, that man was going to be there to pick up the pieces, pay for the damage, and stand behind you no matter what," he said, pointing at Sean. "You've never been abused a day in your life!" Christian pushed himself away from the chair, causing it to rock a little. Matt stared at him, stunned.

"You think it's normal to break your son's nose? Maybe you do, if all that dramatic bullshit you just dished out is true."

"I'll tell you what's dramatic *bullshit*, Matt," Christian said. "Shaving your head, getting rough with your mother, and scaring the hell out of your little sister to get back and your father because you finally managed to push him over the edge into slugging you."

"For what? Pushing Mom? He's such a hypocrite."

"It was wrong of me to ever treat your mother that way, no matter what the circumstances were. I wasn't in my right mind, and that's no excuse either. If you'd seen me shove your mother, what would you have done to me?"

"I'm just sorry I wasn't there."

"Because you'd have done what, exactly? Come on, tell me," Sean urged, moving closer.

"I'd have kicked your ass!" Matt shot back, angrily, standing and sending the chair skidding behind him.

"You wish you'd been there so you could hit me for grabbing and pushing your mother, right? Now you know how I felt when you did the same, asinine thing. We didn't raise you with violence, Matt. But all the answers you're coming up with for your problems involve violence. I know you're confused, and you're angry at me about keeping Ava's secret from you - -"

"Don't even mention her name," Matt said, glowering at Sean.

"It wasn't Sean's decision to keep the Ava situation a secret. If you're going to hate everyone involved in it, at least spread it around. We all knew it, and we all were afraid it would destroy you, that it would do just what it's doing."

"There's plenty of hate left over for you for screwing her!" Matt shouted.

"Matt, you couldn't have known about Ava. There's nothing for you to feel embarrassed or confused about," Sean said, hoping to de-escalate the situation just a little. "One of the reasons she had affairs with very young men is because their inexperience was in her favor. The final surgery we did on her was very minor. No one suspected anything - - not even your mother, in the time they were friends. She fit in as a woman in every possible way."

"Don't try to explain away what you did. You lied to me. You put your patient's confidentiality over me."

"Welcome to the reality of living with doctors, Matty," Christian said, crossing his arms over his chest. "Your father didn't keep the secret for Ava's sake, he kept it for yours, because your mother and I thought it was the best thing to do, and we convinced him of that. But even if he'd kept the secret for Ava, it would mean he was an ethical doctor, not a bad father."

"He's not my father at all. Which is just fine with me." As Matt walked past him, Christian grabbed him by the arm and pulled him back, though he wrenched his arm away quickly.

"We're not finished here."

"I am."

"You're finished when we tell you you're finished," Christian retorted, and his tone left no room for argument. Matt exhaled and curled his lip slightly, standing there with his arms crossed over his chest, watching them.

"The bottom line is that you can hate me all you want," Sean said, "but don't take it out on your sister. You know perfectly well she's in no danger with me, and messing up her chances to have a good relationship with her father isn't doing her any favors."

"Opening her eyes to what you really are is a favor."

"If anyone needs his eyes opened, it's you," Christian said. "You want to be treated like a man. Let me tell you a secret, Matty. The test of what kind of man you are is in how you deal with the shit life throws at you. It's time to start growing up and quit expecting your parents to be perfect. Your parents are as flawed and human as you are, get over it. That's reality."

"Thanks for the tip. I kind of figured you guys were flawed when I found out you screwed my mother while she was engaged to my dad. Oh, wait, that makes you my dad...I keep having trouble keeping that straight."

"Taking care of you when you're sick, planning and saving for your future, loving you and being proud of you - - that makes Sean your father. Biology doesn't change that. Nor does it change the fact that even when I didn't know you were my son, I still loved you as if you were. There's no reason for you to feel alone or alienated unless that's what you want."

"Matt, we know none of this has been easy for you, and if you need to put distance between us to get through it, I'll respect that choice. But Annie's just a little girl, and I won't stand by and let you hurt her and frighten her for nothing."

"What are you going to do about it?"

"Don't try me," Sean said, anger flaring in his eyes that seemed to give Matt pause, at least temporarily.

"Threats? That's great. You wanna hit me again, or I guess not, in front of witnesses."

"I'll do whatever it takes to protect your sister. You want to be a man, and you want to play hard ball, fine. But be very sure that's what you want if you decide to drag Annie back into the middle of this."

"I have to get back to class," Matt said, not exactly backing down from Sean, but seeming a bit unsettled by the ultimatum and the look on Sean's face. When he walked out this time, neither man moved to stop him.

"What are you thinking?" Christian asked, not entirely comfortable with the slow burning anger that had bubbled to the surface.

"I don't know yet, but he's not leaving me a choice. I'll do what I have to do to protect Annie. I still have to sign the papers to release the money from his college fund, so if I have to hit him where it really hurts, to protect Annie, that's what I'll do. I guess I didn't want to give up on my son to save my daughter."

"Maybe he just needed a little jolt to set him straight."

"I'm sorry about the way he reacted to what you told him. I thought it would get through to him."

"I wasn't looking for sympathy or even acknowledgment. I just want him to realize what real abuse is, and that he's never experienced it."

"Excuse me, doctors," Ms. Wentworth said as she re-entered her office. "I have an appointment with another parent in a few minutes, and I saw Matt on his way back to class. Is there anything I should know?"

"Matt's dealing with some personal issues, but we're hopeful we can get them worked out with a minimal impact on his grades this year," Sean said.

"You know his grades have declined a bit recently? He's still passing his classes, but if he doesn't pick up his performance, it will adversely affect his final grade point average."

"We're working on it, Ms. Wentworth," Christian said. "Thank you again for the use of your office."

"Of course. Please let me know if there's anything we can do here to help with the situation. We do have a counselor - -"

"That's a definitely possibility, but we'd probably seek private counseling. Thank you, though," Christian said.

As they walked to the car, Christian brought up the counseling subject again.

"I think we should get him into therapy."

"He'll be receptive to that," Sean said sarcastically.

"He will be if it's mandatory. We need to talk this over with Julia, and force the issue. Matt's so angry and so bitter that I have the feeling he'd self-destruct before he'd let go of this stuff and get on with his life. He's so busy trying to prove something to us that he's going to end up a very sorry young man in a few years."

"You're probably right," Sean agreed, sliding into the driver's seat while Christian got into the passenger side. "You didn't have to take the heat for the Ava thing." Sean pulled out into traffic, driving them back toward the office.

"Wouldn't you have told Matt, left on your own to decide?"

"Probably, but I'm not sure that would have yielded any better results."

"Pull over up here."

"Why?" Sean frowned, though he did pull over in front of the vacant lot as instructed. He was startled when Christian pulled him as close as seatbelts and the console would allow, and kissed him thoroughly, their tongues exploring each other's mouths. When they separated, Christian just smiled, laying his hand on Sean's cheek and brushing his thumb lightly over Sean's lips.

"I just couldn't look at these anymore without having them," he said, then leaned over and kissed Sean again.

"I thought it was just me," Sean admitted, looking a little embarrassed. "I can't stop thinking about it. I feel like a lovesick teenager."

"Let's get take out and go to your place as soon as we wrap things up for the day, what do you say?"

"You have to ask? My last appointment is at four."

"I don't have anymore appointments today, so as soon as you do your magic on your four o'clock, we'll head for home."

"Tomorrow night, I'll be picking Annie up after school so she can spend the weekend, so we'll have to be on our good behavior."

"Only for Annie would I make such a promise," Christian replied, grinning and flexing his eyebrows.

********

THE END...for this time