Disclaimer: The boys are not mine. Neither is the armadillo.

Notes: A friend told me about a stuffed animal that somebody gave her... It gave me an idea...

WARNING!!!! Make sure you don't have anything in your mouth or hands before you read this. Otherwise, I won't be responsible for the consequences.


"Armadillo"

by Winds-of-Dawn


"Sandy? What's this?"

Blair sighed. "Somebody gave it to me. She had to go to San Antonio for a job interview, and asked me to take care of her lizard..."

"A lizard?" Megan frowned. "Your friend has a lizard? For a pet?"

"Yeah," Blair nodded. "Anyway, when she came back, she gave that to me, I guess, as a way of saying thank you..."

Megan turned the thing around in her hand, studying it closely.

It was about 11 inches long, from the tip of the nose to the tip of the tail. It had a brown body with dark stripes, and the head, legs and tail were tan. It had beady black eyes, and a long, thick, protruding, cone-shaped tail, which extended prominently from the round, furry, lump of its body.

"I mean, this is real cute, but... what's this supposed to be, anyway?" she finally asked.

"Armadillo."

"Looks like a dildo, to me," said a voice from behind them, making them both jump.

Grinning, Jim took the stuffed toy out of Megan's limp hand and plopped it down on top of the computer monitor.

"Norma got back ok?" he asked Blair as he lowered himself into his chair.

"Uh, yeah, she came by just now to pick up her lizard..." Blair said, as Megan beat a hasty strategic retreat.

"Thank god," said Jim, as he pulled the keyboard closer to himself.

"um, jim?"

"hmm?"

"You, um, going to leave that there?"

Jim cocked his head and contemplated the stuffed animal on top of the monitor.

"Why not?" he said. "I think it's cute."

"Jiiiiiim."

"We can call it Norma Dildo," Jim said, smiling at Blair's discomfiture.

Just then Simon passed by the desk.

"What's this?" he asked as he swept the stuffed toy up from the monitor.

"Jim, so help you god, if you say it's a Norma Dildo..." Blair whispered fiercely under his breath.

Jim smiled reassuringly at his partner, then turned to Simon.

"It's a Blair Dildo, sir."


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