Wide Awake
by Marguerite Muguet


Category: Angst
Disclaimer: No my name is not George Lucas so I'm not making any money on this thing. In fact I'm an alien from the planet Xjoieur and money doesn't exist in my world. I have abducted the characters and cloned them and I'm having a lot of fun with the clones. I put back the originals in their place ( I think they're the originals.) Also, the lyrics are from the album 'Famous, Rich and Beautiful' of the philosopherkings (lyrics and music by Jon Levine) I didn't ask for permission, but since I not making money out of this...
Pairing: Well, Han/Luke, kind of
Rating: PG-13
Summary: No way, you'll just have to read it :)
Warnings: Well, this hasn't been betaed because I lost my beta-reader some time ago and I should also warn you that this isn't a happy fic. Yes I know I promised a funny one, but I just can't. It's just not me. Oh, also I messed up with the canon big time. Callista is in this story, but Han and Leia don't have children. There, take it or leave it.


maybe I was dreaming when I saw your beautiful face
but now I'm wide awake
but now I'm wide awake
and I can't fall asleep again

"I don't think this is going to work Han."

"Leia.."

"No! I don't have time for this, the New Republic needs me."

"I need you too."

"Maybe, but you don't love me."

"Leia..."

"Don't try to deny it Han. It hurts enough already. We both know who you really love. Yes, you need me, to forget him, but I refuse to be used any longer."

(sigh)"I didn't know, at first. I swear it, I never meant to hurt you Leia."

"I know. I... I think you should go now, give me time to heal."

(whisper)"I'm sorry, but now I'm wide awake."

I have loved you long before we met
but I didn't know
now I'm wide awake
now I'm wide awake
and I can't fall asleep again

"Luke! I've been practising and I feel like I'm feeling the Force again."

"That's great Callista."

"Just great?! It's fantastic. Soon we'll be able to be really together again. Luke? What is it."

"Callista we need to talk."

"What is it Luke? Luke, look at me in the eyes please."

(he does)

"I...I've been having dreams Callista. It's like all this time I've been sleeping and now that I'm awake I know where's my place. I'm no longer confused, I no longer feel like the world is a strange place and that I have no control over my life."

"What are you trying to really tell me Luke?"

"I've discovered my one true love."

"No..."

"Callista...Come back."

Maybe I was sleeping every second of my life
I was in a daze
but, now I'm wide awake
but, now I'm wide awake
and I can't fall asleep, asleep

"Come on, Chewie, we're leaving."

"RRrrrRRR"

"Don't ask right now. I just have to put some space between us and Coruscant."

"rrRRRrrr"

"I'll tell you later O.K.? And no I don't think we'll be back."

I'm sorry Leia. God, I can't believe that I've been deluding myself during six years. And now what? I admit it, I love him. I love Luke, but I can't do a thing. He's with Callista, the woman who's his soulmate.

"Take us to Lielos will you."

"RRRrrrRRr"

"Just do what I tell you. We'll find something to do when we arrive."

Oh God. It hurts, I love you Luke. I wish we could be together, but I'll content myself with the thought that you are happy with her. I'll probably never see you again. I wish I could feel the Force to be sure that you're alright. Good bye Luke, I'll always love you.

now my eyes have opened on this world
and I can see there's nothing in it
for me, and I'm so tired

"Callista.."

"Tell me, did you ever love me."

"I don't think so. I cared about you, I still do, but..."

"It's not enough."

"No, it's not enough."

"Who is she?"

"It isn't a she."

"O.k. Who is he? Tell me Luke, I deserve the truth and It can't hurt more than it already does."

"It's Han."

(shaky laugh from Callista)

"Your sister's husband? Well good luck, dear, he's married and I'm sure they're thinking of children."

"Callista, I know that. There's no need to..."

"To what? To be mean? Oh no, Luke this is my right. If I'm going to hurt you're going to hurt also. It's a little late, don't you think Luke, to discover your feelings? You're going to be as miserable as I'm going to be, because you couldn't hurt your sister and tell Han how you feel, could you?"

"Stop it, Callista. I never meant to hurt you."

"No, you didn't but that's not going to change a thing."

"Where are you going?"

"I'm leaving, I can't stand being near you."

(whisper)"I'm sorry Callista, but now I'm wide awake and I can't delude myself any longer."

Luke stood there, looking at the retreating form of Callista. But all he could thing of was that if he was no longer dreaming, then real life was a nightmare. He had just condemned himself to an eternity of loneliness. Maybe he shouldn't have awakened.

Maybe I was sleeping when you brought your pretty face into my world
but now I'm wide awake
and I can't fall asleep again


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