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Genesis II

A Stargate Slash Zine Anthology.  

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"DANIEL!"  Jack yelled, his voice carrying down the hallway and probably two levels above and below where Daniel paced.

What now?  Daniel stopped in the middle of the corridor, turning to face the irate Colonel.  And judging from the look on Jack's face, the SGC was about to find itself minus one resident archaeologist.

"Yes, Jack?"  He sighed, waiting for Jack to get to the point.  Daniel just wanted off-world, to get away from Jack and whatever managed to set him off this time.  Since Jack had been released from the hospital, it was one argument after another over the smallest things.  The SGC had become their own private war zone and Daniel had had enough. 

"Don't play the innocent with me, Daniel."  Jack was livid.  

"So what great crime have I managed to commit now?"  Pissed in your territory, Jack? Daniel thought to himself. "Did I drink the last of the coffee?  Leave the toilet seat up in the head? Oh, I know!"  Daniel snapped his fingers.  "I'm breathing in your air space again.  Excuse me.  I'll leave."  Daniel stalked off down the hall. 

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  • The Fire Sermon by JayEm -

Heat.

Running.

Heat.

Stop to breathe scorching air.

Run again.

Not enough moisture left in us to even sweat anymore. Not a spare moment to speak - and not a hell of a lot to say even if we could spare the breath or energy for it.

No time, no time, no time….

Funny how you always think there’ll be plenty of time to say and do all the things you put off for the good of the team, for fear of things your imagination can turn into huge walls of distance that only serve to play into the fears themselves.

"Jack…" Daniel’s voice rasps out; it sounds so harsh and would hardly be recognizable if I didn’t know we were the only two people alive on this planet.

At least - we are for now.

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"Vodka."

And Daniel Jackson can hear the drink being poured, but doesn’t look up as the glass is slid in front of him. Doesn’t look up as he stares down at the clear liquid filling the glass. Part of him knows he shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be sitting in this place with the hope of getting so drunk he can’t even remember his own name, can’t even remember the week he’s just had. And to think, only a few days ago his life was running along just fine. Running along with no hint that it was about to change, with no hint that he was about to be hit with the fact that he can no longer deny that he’s in love with Jack O’Neill. Fuck! Knocking back the vodka, he slams the glass back onto the bartop.

"Another."

The barman raises an eyebrow and Daniel can almost see what he’s thinking. Can almost see him calculating how quick it’s going to take Daniel to get drunk if he continues with the pace he’s just set.

And he knows the guy is right, knows that he should go home, knows he should leave before he takes the second drink, the third, the fourth. But he’s been looking at the four walls for days and if he has to see them for one more minute he’ll throw something. Hell, he might just throw something anyway, just to see it shatter. To watch it fall to pieces, just like the illusion that he was in control of his life did. "Another." The glare that accompanies it would put Teal’c to shame.

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The buzzing in my ears was getting louder, synchronizing with the pounding in my head. I fumbled open the plastic bottle of super strength Tylenol, and poured out four of the tablets. The cold dregs in my mug weren’t the best way to wash them down, but I wasn’t too sure I could trust my legs to carry me to the coffee maker. 

Janet had ordered me to get some rest after reluctantly releasing me from the infirmary. I was bone weary, but I knew trying to sleep was out of the question. There were too many ghosts haunting my dreams to let me rest. 

The pain in my head flared white hot, taking my breath, then settled down to a dull scream. I tried to ignore the little voice that said I ought to go back to the infirmary, but the thought of spending another night hooked up to a monitor while nurses rotated through checking vitals every half an hour was enough to squash that impulse. I was tired of Janet hovering over me, flashing that damn pen light in my eyes, telling me, again, how lucky I was that this last bout with the Goa'uld hand device hadn’t cause any permanent neurological damage. I was tired of the sympathetic glances of the infirmary staff, of their whispers, of the well-wishers dropping in to see how I was coping with yet another loss. I was exhausted, but not enough to guarantee a dreamless night. So instead of lying on a bunk staring at the wall, I was in my office trying to get some work done and failing miserably.

"Daniel, why is your door locked?" The rattle of the doorknob was accompanied by one of the voices that echoed in my dreams. "Daniel, answer me." I ignored it. "Daniel, the doc said you're restricted to base and I've already check the sleep quarters, Sam's lab, and the cafeteria, so I know you're in there. Open up."

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The last image of the dream flashed back to him, and he shivered, letting his hands fall into his lap, staring into the shadows of his bedroom, trying to bring the framed pictures on the far wall into focus. Without his glasses, in the dark, it was a pointless exercise, but it gave him something else to think about.

Something other than the fact that this time, the people crushed in the collapse of the exhibit in his dream had been not his parents, but Jack, Sam, and Teal’c.

And he, true to form, had been able to do nothing to stop it.

He shuddered again. So much for sleeping. He automatically reached out for his glasses, disentangled himself from the sheets, and sat on the edge of the bed.

2:00 in the morning.

God, it was going to be a long night.

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He’s been drifting away from us for weeks now, and I haven’t a clue what to do about it. I’m not sure exactly when it started. Maybe it was with Anise and her damned Xerox-detector machine, maybe it was before that – I know he felt kind of left out when Carter, Teal’c and I were up on Thor’s ship without him, but we had no choice about that. It wasn’t like we planned it; like we got together and figured out a way to make his appendix burst so we wouldn’t have to take him with us. Hell, I would’ve liked to have had him there – could’ve done with the help.

But that doesn’t change the fact that he’s been drifting. I already said that, right? Said it, thought it, whatever. It’s a good description though. These past few weeks he’s been spending what is, in my opinion, way too much time off world with other teams. We hardly see him. I hardly see him. He’s always got some excuse these days, a ‘good reason’ why he can’t spend any of his time with me. I know they’re excuses, I can tell. I can see him thinking them up as he stutters out thanks for the invitation to spend more than five minutes in my company. A guy could begin to get paranoid.

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Daniel sat at the table, nose firmly placed in the book that he had been reading for the past few hours. He wanted to get this book finished before the briefing tomorrow so he could tell Hammond what he thought the symbols on P5W-835 might mean. They looked vaguely familiar to him when the MALP’s first transmissions came through late last night, and he was sure he would figure it out if he poured over the several texts that lay before him on the table.

As Daniel turned the page, he barely acknowledged the feeling of someone behind him coming closer. Just as Daniel was automatically reaching out for his cup of coffee, a hand gently landed on his shoulder, startling him and causing him to spill the liquid. An elbow automatically sought out its target and a small ‘oof’ was heard in the quiet room.

"Damn it, Jack. I need to finish reading this before tomorrow. Take a cold shower or something," he stated irritably, not in the mood for a horny colonel right now. He didn’t even look up from his book, but continued reading while absently flicking his other hand out to his side in a vain attempt to dry the coffee that had spilled over his fingers.

He quickly wiped his hand on his pants and reached out for his drink again, never once removing his eyes from the page.

He was completely unaware when the door to his apartment softly clicked shut.

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When he finally got back to his house, having driven down the mountain in the teeming rain, Jack entered the door to silence. The house itself was dark, an empty feeling its only inhabitant as far as he could tell.

"Daniel?"

Methodically, Jack searched the rooms, finding Daniel's USAF-issue coat, even his shoes, but no sign of the man himself. It was then that he found the back door standing slightly ajar, the occasional gust of wind blowing rain into the house.

Suddenly, all he could think about was Charlie.

Even though there was nothing similar, not even the location, the same cold feeling that had ripped through him when he heard the gunshot made Jack's heart clench inside him. No. Surely...

"Daniel!"

The wind whipped away the word almost before Jack uttered it, his shout smothered by its fury.

"DANIEL!"

That cry too, was swept away by the wind. Jack's eyes raked the garden, searching for any sign of Daniel's passing, but the gate was shut and bolted, which meant...

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Everything changes. People change. Worlds change. Enemies change. It all evolves; turns into something else for better or for worse. Sometimes you see someone else. Sometimes you are someone else.

A smell you've never noticed before tickles at the back of your mind, its presence comforting, known. A smile, a walk disrupts your thoughts. You get lost in the change wondering where do you go from here.

And it gets to that point where you really have to ask yourself…did it ever happen at all? Do you really want to know if it hadn't?

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